Pearl-Clutching Beta Males

34:30And so Gavin Newsom was like, okay, tit for tat. Let's pony it up, big boy. We'll gerrymander too. And then I heard Pritzker, the governor of Illinois was like, okay, let's do it. Hochul's like, let's do it. And I'm like, fuck yes. It's time for fuck you politics. And I think we need to package our support for all of these people with a brand of fuck you. We sure do. And you know what? I think it's incredibly important because they've got this insane idea that they're the only patriots, that they're the only real Americans. And let me tell you something. I've been a sharpshooter since I was 12 years old.

35:01I got my first gun for my 12th birthday. And I look at these people and I have complained about this as a volunteer for the democratic politics for 20 years. We show up to a gunfight with a pen and they show up with an Uzi. And I'm at the point where I'm like, you want to have a duel? Let's go cowboy style. Let's go. We have to fight fire with fire. We have to stop believing that someday they're going to wake up, have a conscience and realize that decorum is central to living in a civil society. They don't care about decorum. They're out here trying to earn gotcha points, posting AI of people getting eaten by alligators on social media.

35:40And we think we're having a conversation with people who have a moral compass. no completely and i think they need to be completely called out for the breathtaking disgusting hypocrites that they are we live in oklahoma bible thump dump truck okay not our city it's a purple city and i love the people here but generally the people here brag not as not a county turned blue and i'm like that's not the flex you think it is but whatevs but what what What bothers me about it is it's like they're so forward facing about Jesus. Right. And then at the same time, this guy, I'm not a Christian, but everybody around me is in this state.

36:19And they're always talking about Jesus, Jesus this. Have you been saved? Do you know Jesus? Do you have friends with Jesus? I'm like, shut the fuck up. But nonetheless. So I read up about Jesus. Right. And this Jesus guy spoke out against the accumulation of wealth. He said, I think the quote is something I'm paraphrasing here because I'm not the biggest biblical scholar, as you can imagine, with my aforementioned atheism, but that a camel would have an easier time making its way through the eye of a needle than a rich man would to heaven. So this whole hypocrisy where you have all of these people, like I like to pick on that Scott Jennings, big, big Bible guy on CNN, right?

36:59And he wants to be this big Jesus guy, but all he is, is a cheerleader for a billionaire. He's a billionaire's bitch that brought him out on stage as his little show pony, right? And as long as Scott Jennings doesn't speak out of line, then Trump heaps praise on him. And I just think what a demeaning position to be in, to not believe in anything. And you seek the approval of McCankle's taco tits who can't even blend his makeup. Like that does it for you? Like that's it? I think it's teeny weeny syndrome. I mean, I just think a lot of these men have, they have little dick energy. They have insecurity.

37:37They're overcompensating. And so if any proximity to power, they just quiver. Oh, yeah. And it's particularly why they're so intimidated by liberal women because liberal women have their own big dick energy. Right. I'm like, I don't, we don't need you. And they hate that. They hate and empowered anybody who they think is supposed to serve them rather than be their equal. And it's a particularly perplexing thing for me because I've done all the Bible reading. I grew up in a family filled with Italian Catholics. Literally one of my cousins is a priest in Italy in the Catholic Church. My dad is a raging atheist after the particular brand of Christianity he grew up with.

38:26And the entire rest of my family is Jewish. So I spent my entire childhood going to church, going to synagogue, and then being asked questions about why any of those beliefs should be counted as more true than any of the other. And it led me to study, I'm talking like collegiate Islamic studies, going into theology, studying the Tao Te Ching, reading the Upanishads, the Rig Vedas. I have delved into what faith looks like around the world, trying to find the thing that's true for everybody, and then how that true thing gets bastardized. And whatever it is, whether it's the Bible thumpers next door to you or the people who truly believe they have the word of God anywhere in the world, every quote unquote good book says the same thing.

39:16Love thy neighbor, be generous, give the shirt off your back, share your food with others. The whole point of any faith is to take care of each other. And these people are out here trying to literally starve children to death, take away healthcare, subjugate women, let you die in the emergency room. They're trying to overturn Emtala right now. And they're saying they're following the word of God. I'm like, Oh, bros. If you met Jesus today, you'd, you'd deport him. I think the people that live around us would be shocked to shit of his skin color. Right. That he's not well, you know, because they do, you know, and what's interesting is what they've done, you know, with Jesus, I saw a meme the other day and it was like, it was a picture of Jesus with his abs and he was on the crucifix and somebody wrote, I wish we could get Jesus's workout and somebody put CrossFit.

40:11Then the other person commented, nailed it. That is such a deep cut. It was so good. But it reminds me what they do to Trump. You know, there's all of these homoerotic images of Trump, where he has like a six pack, and now they're calling him daddy, which all the three of us know what that means in the gay community. And I just think that there's a lot of, I have this theory and I talk about it from time to time, but I think with MAGA men, I think that they are very closeted by curious and or closeted gay. And here's my theory. I think when they're, you know, their wife's gone to bed, they're pulling up Pornhub, right?

40:58They got the lotion out. They got the tissue box out. I'm sorry to visualize it like that. I was going to say that's, but I got to paint the picture. So they get on, they're watching porn. And then right when the money shot happens for the viewer, I happen to have been looking at a rock hard cock. Well, if you're some big MAGA guy and you've got a Ford F-150 with, you know, jacked up tires, you maybe got truck, truck nuts on your truck. Yep. On the back. You wear, you know, I'm a big boy with my grenade and I'm a super patriot MAGA coated stuff all the time and then after that orgasm you're like oh god i just orgasmed to the cock the cock did it well then it happens again and again and again and so then they start brow beating gay people instead of just acknowledging that hey yeah i kind of got turned on by the cock big fucking deal right you know it doesn't mean you're completely gay maybe a little bi curious whatever the label we don't give a shit but by the way who cares right exactly but they do and And that's why I think there's such a myopic focus.

42:00Yeah. Because I mean, my real job when I'm not a podcaster is I'm an interior designer. So I've been around gay men forever. And I've never heard a group of men speak about gay sex as much as I have from MAGA politicians. As I have out at a gay bar with men actively on Grindr saying, what do you think? How should I respond to this? I've never seen anything like it. No, they're obsessed. And what's interesting to me is they have been handed essentially a package of shame by our society. And that package of shame they claim comes from the word of God or from righteousness or from patriotism, whatever it is, because these are all fanatical belief systems.

42:45When we're talking about the world of MAGA, it gets it gets cultified. and that shame eats them up and then they take that poison and they spew it on everybody else and people who just are who they are who are open to new information who are open to expanding their toolkit of learning and ways to show up in the world aren't barfing shame all over other people all the time. And it's like, we look at somebody like a Lindsey Graham and I'm like, honey, just be who you are. Like put on the heels, live kind of like Prince did. And maybe you'd be like fun for your constituents to hang out with instead of trying to murder half of them.

43:36You know, it's such a weird thing to me. It's like, I'm miserable, so everybody else has to be miserable too. And I think that's particularly why they're so afraid of us, of queer people, because they see people choosing their inner knowing, which is spiritual, choosing their freedom, which is revolutionary, choosing to love in the face of hate, which requires such moral aptitude and such generosity that, that it makes them feel ashamed that they don't have it. Right. So it's not that, Oh, your love is wrong. Your family is wrong. It's your freedom intimidates me because I'm a chicken shit who could never be free.

44:23And I think there's a jealousy. I think that because when, if you are a gay person in the United States of America, which is a very religious first world country compared to Europe. And you had especially people, the gays that I ran around with in Oklahoma City, they had to first their first bully was their parents and their their peers and their family. So they had to get past so many barriers to be able to have shame free sex, to be able to go to a gay bar and give their partner or somebody they're interested in, you know, a kiss on the cheek without shame. So they had to do so much more work than a heterosexual person does to be able to do that.

45:04So by the time they've done that, they have so much more depth. Then they're having this fabulous shame-free sex. And the inherent problem with religion for me is, well, there's multiple. There's one ad. I could go on all day. But the one I want to talk about right now, one of the inherent problems with religion is that they try to regulate something that we're genetically hardwired to do. were genetically hardwired to fuck to perpetuate the species. But it's the one thing they try to regulate. So if you tell people their whole lives, you can't have sex, you can't have sex, you can't have sex, then all of a sudden you get married and you can.

45:40How are you supposed to like it? I remember my very first boyfriend when I went to Westmore High School in Moore, Oklahoma. Jaguars. Go Jags. My boyfriend's dad was a former Southern Baptist preacher. So his parents were big Bible thumpers. My parents, total atheists. It was kind of weird, like when I was at their house. Well, his name, I won't say his name. He got in huge trouble because his mother busted him masturbating. The most normal thing a 16, 17-year-old boy could do, beat off, right? So he gets in huge trouble. He's grounded. And then he was the person I lost my virginity with. And every time after we would have sex, there was all this guilt.

46:21And he would talk about how wrong it was. And it just wasn't a part of my experience. Like my parents had told me, you and you know who are getting kind of close. Make sure you protect yourself from pregnancy, blah, blah. It was just a very normal conversation, awkward as shit. I wanted to, you know, crawl under the sofa and die. But he had all of this shame about like masturbating or being, you know, screwing a 17-year-old girlfriend. We're both 17 in high school. Yeah. Like what's the point of that? Well, and the shame, that's what metastasizes, right? the shame especially when it's put on you as a young person you look around look at all these ultra maga guys that are out there like release the epstein files down with the with the left wing pedophile cabal three of them have been convicted of of whole of um what's the word i'm looking for i'm gonna start that sentence over sorry for your editor three of them have been caught in the last week and been arrested for having child porn yeah and like what hey i want to say something we all need to do.

47:22You said, you said child porn and somebody brought this to my attention. We have to quit saying child porn and we have to say, uh, photographs of sexual abuse of a child of children. And I just, somebody brought that to my attention just in the last week or two. And I thought, Oh my God, that's so true because it's the same as it's the same as the discourse around Trump and Epstein and everyone keeps saying, uh, you know, underage women. No, underage women are children. Right. Yes. Yes. Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell sexually abused children, children. And these are the corrections that I think are worth it.

48:01These are the corrections when you're talking about people who have been egregiously and savagely victimized and about how the language that we use has normalized and protected the abusers. This is the language I want to be corrected on. This is the language that I think helps protect victims of sexual abuse and further stigmatizes the abuser instead of the other way around. Right. Because speaking of all the shame, sex abuse victims don't come forward because of the shame heaped on them by the people, the predator. And we're doing that right now on a global stage. Donald Trump is victimizing these kids over and over.

48:46I mean, they're adult women now, but they were children at the time. And it just makes me sick that we're all talking about, you know, Ghislaine Maxwell, what's she going to tell? Trump's saying it's a hoax. Like we have real victims here, hundreds and hundreds of victims and nobody gives a shit about them. And that's something that drives me nuts. Just like it's so important. Look, it is incredibly important where we say not underage women we say children the victims were children that's a linguistic correction that's worth it us saying donald trump's a man baby pussy don't correct me on that i'm not wrong but it's like these are the things that help us undo the sort of psychosocial layer the kind of of one layer under your obvious consciousness of, oh, we tell these stories in our society, socially and psychologically, they downplay how bad the stories are.

49:45It's true. That we should be correcting. And they're patriarchal systems that we all grew up in and that you don't realize and you're not consciously aware of until later. Like you have an awakening, especially if you grew up, like I'm sure we all did in white circles and you kind of have this wake up later on in life when you have more diversity and people that had a different experience than you did and you have an awakening. And I think these are the things that are worthy of correction. These are the things that are worthy of the fight, especially like the amount of sexual abuse and depravity that is prevalent in the MAGA movement is staggering.

50:32Okay, guys, I have to share with you dupe.com. My daughter and I were looking at furniture for her apartment and dupe.com saved us so much money and we got incredible pieces. Dupe.com isn't just about saving money on furniture either. Dupe works for fashion, shoes, jewelry, and more. Dupe is one of the most viral shopping hacks on TikTok. Millions of people have already used dupe to save money. Dupe.com is so easy to use. All you have to do is type dupe.com forward slash before any product URL and instantly shows you similar and more affordable alternatives. It's basically magic. Dupe.com, easy to use.

51:18Just type dupe.com forward slash before any product URL in your browser and boom. It instantly finds you less expensive alternatives. They even have an app and a browser extension you can download. No account required, no signup required. It's completely free to use. So stop wasting money on brand names and start saving with dupe.com today. All right, listeners, summer's here and we're all chasing something. I'll tell you what I'm chasing is a better forehand. You all know I think I'm really good at tennis. and my tennis merch and swag that I wear directly impacts my game. That's why I cannot share enough with you how much I love Bombas socks.

52:08Seriously, they are so fantastic. They wick the sweat. They help keep my feet cool. They fight blisters and they make specialized pairs for hiking, tennis, golf, you name it. Bombas is simply head to toe comfort. Plus the best thing of all, they don't just feel good. Bombas actually does good. And this makes me feel so good about purchasing their products. One purchase equals one donated item to someone who needs it. And I think that's just really neat. Listener, head over to bombas.com and use the code HATIT for 20 % off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S.com, code HADIT at checkout. Bombas.com, and be sure to use the code HADIT.

52:57Some might say homes.com is the best home shopping site. Could it be because it has a sleek, spam-free site or the most in-depth school info? Homes.com knows every parent wants the best for their kids. So they're the only ones with school and district details and reviews from multiple sources, including niche. It may be homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent directory, or maybe it's that homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home best. Perhaps it's because homes.com has the most in-depth neighborhood content of any home shopping site that's extensively researched to highlight the personality of each neighborhood.

53:46Homes.com has 22 data visualization layers, seven environmental layers, and allows you to search by commute and architectural factors. It's the home search you've been searching for. Go to homes.com today for home shopping the way it should be. Homes.com. We've done your homework. it's really worth pulling at the thread of certain belief systems. A couple of things. The sexual abuse prevalent in their movement, staggering. 97 % of children, I believe this is the stat. Y 'all can, you know, check it and correct me in the notes on the show if I'm wrong. But it's something crazy, like 92 % or 97 % of kids, children, that get sexually abused are sexually abused by a father or a stepfather.

54:34not by an immigrant not by a stranger not by a teacher not by a drag queen reading story hour right by by a parent or family member then we start to look at where a lot of this shame comes in and you look at you know the the ones who have this illicit material of children you look at the ones who are closeted and doing crazy things behind the scenes and you wonder well what did those messages like, you know, like Jennifer, like your boyfriend when he was a teenager got, if you get broken about sex as a kid, and I don't know this to be true. I'm just asking questions because I'm a curious person.

55:11If you get broken about sex as a kid, does that increase your likelihood that as an adult, you are a pedophile? I don't know. What if it does? Like, what if the unhealthy attitudes that come out of these quote unquote religious institutions that are literally going against what their religious books say in their practice in society. What if that's what's making people sick? And then you start to look at things like homophobia and all of these issues. It's not lost on me. You know, there was a great tragic, I shouldn't say great tragic, but important documentary on Netflix years ago called like the secret keepers, I believe.

55:50Yes. All about the young women. Oh my God. Yes. And, and, and a friend of mine who is a literal theologian, thank God she had the academic know-how to point this out to me, after we watched it, oh, I have goosebumps thinking about it, said, you know, there's rampant sexual abuse of girls in the Catholic church as well. They just don't talk about it because if they talk about the abuse of boys, they can continue to demonize queer people. And it took my breath away that these women who survived it had to make their own documentary because nobody wants to talk about the grown men abusing little girls.

56:25The amount of scandal in churches with children is unbelievable. And I, you know, MAGA, the QAnon sect of the MAGA world, they're like, we support the kids. I'm like, okay, everybody does. Like everybody that I know opposes sexual abuse towards children. Thanks for letting me know. But if they do this, if this is really their number one driving force in the world, look no further than the churches. My husband's a criminal defense attorney. Every time he has a case that involves some sort of sexual abuse, when you look at the list of where this abuser had worked, it's always at a church at some point, at some time.

57:10And these churches have paid out hundreds of millions of dollars from the Nazarenes to the Southern Baptists to the Mormons to the Catholics and on and on and on. And after being around my husband for 25 years and these cases that he's had before, I mean, I just knew number one, I'm never sending my kids to a sleepaway camp ever. I mean, it was, it was already a foregone conclusion that my kids weren't going to church. I mean, that was church camp. That was just an absolute, no, you're not going to church. But, um, cause I went once when I was younger and it was terrifying. The church was, there was all this tongue talking, all this crazy shit going on.

57:46The preacher was in like a white mink coat. It was bananas. It scared the shit out of me. But it's just, it's crazy how if a business had this type of sexual misconduct, it would go out of business. But the fact that the Catholic Church, the Southern Baptists, the Nazarenes and on and on and on are still in business, still not taxed. And to the contrary, now Trump is encouraging people in workplace to proselytize to each other. If somebody walked up to me in my workplace and started laying hands on me, I would punch them in the face. Right. Like that is not appropriate. That is not for me. How dare you?

58:27And, and, and it's crazy to me, you know, again, I feel really lucky that I have the, you know, I'm not going to call it academic level by any means, but I have a pretty decent background in theological study. And then I have a dear friend who is a literal theologian. So I get to, you know, press a lot of questions I have with her. And it shocks me, you know, when we want to learn about something, we want to learn how to fix a system. We do research. We want to learn how to cure a disease. We do research. We get new information. We adjust the findings and we hopefully, you know, get to the answer faster.

59:00And for some reason with religion, people aren't willing to do that. And when you just pull at that thread a little bit, you know, even the Leviticus of it all, my friend, the theologian who went to seminary was like, no, we study when do not lay with a man, the way you lie with a woman, whatever it says. When they shifted in the biblical translations, do not lay with a child to do not lay with a man. And when you think about all of us becoming versions of property to these very mediocre men in charge, that shifted in the evolution of agriculture. When you could buy and sell cattle, buy and sell land, and they essentially wanted you to be able to buy and sell women, people with land wanted to marry their daughters, often child daughters, to men with more land.

59:50So the Bible was changed. Then you start to learn that the judgment, the word homosexual didn't appear in the Bible anywhere ever in any language until 1947, when somebody screwed up a translation and when they caught the screw up six months into those Bibles being printed, they'd printed too many to recall them because they would have lost too much money. So they left it in there. So they have caused, not only did they go back on the supposed teaching teachings of their Lord and savior that you shouldn't be a pedophile, but they've run rampant with homophobia because it would just be too expensive to fix it.

1:00:33And, you know, easier to say, don't be with someone you can't procreate with. Cause you know, you gotta, you gotta give your kids your land. Like it's, it all comes back to money. The mid coats and the churches buying private jets and saying, well, I had a bit, I heard the voice of God and he told me I needed a plane so I could fly around the world and preach? You need a jet, sir? No, you want to be an oligarch. Thank you so much for telling me who you are. Totally. And I talk about that, the religious industrial complex in this country is unparalleled anywhere else in the world. I mean, it is a total grift when you're going to a church and they're taking Venmo and tongue talking and all this crazy shit.

1:01:14And I think another reason that they use what, quote, I put this in parentheses, listener, wedge issues, like abortion, the trans issues, the gay issue, is because for white rural Americans, they are only sold a binary choice in the world of everything. Further, there's no culture in rural America except for the church. And so if they can otherize people, and that goes back to our species way back when, just basic tribalism, then it's like, okay, you can't have nice things because of these two lezzies over here, French kissing. That's what's keeping you from having nice things. And they just drum it up.

1:01:53And then they keep moving the goalposts as to who they're mad at. When MAGA people have to understand the reason you can't have nice fucking things has nothing to do with an immigrant, a woman, a bunch of hot lezzies, a bunch of hot gay men. It has nothing to do with any of that. The reason you can't have nice things is because politicians lie to you. They exploit you and they lie to you and they favor corporations over your safety and wellbeing. 12 times out of 10, both parties do it all the time. And that's the fucking problem. That's why they're so miserable. Well, and one of the things that feels really important here and yes, to everything you just said.

1:02:38And if we zoom out from this current moment of absolute insanity where we feel like we're in George Orwell and they're saying, don't believe your own eyes. Don't believe what you're seeing. Don't believe the videos. Don't believe the photos. Don't believe what you literally see in your own neighborhoods even. If we zoom out, part of the problem, and I'm not going to say I excuse the behavior, but part of what makes me feel crazy is in that sort of we bring a pen to the gunfight and they've got an Uzi analogy. we have to be in a fight with these people are all of our elected officials will lose their seats if they don't raise forty seven thousand dollars a day a day so it's like well how who how are they going to do it and if and if the right is so willing to be soulless and take so much dark money and be bought off by anybody the left is going to be bought off a little bit some of them are going to be bought off a lot.

1:03:34Some of them are going to make millions of dollars trading stocks and it's fucked up. And what drives me nuts is if we start to go backwards, every time we've tried to get meaningful campaign finance reform through, we get beat. Citizens United ruined everything. The fact that we legalized lobbyists in the 1970s, there are 27, no, sorry, 21 lobbyists per member of Senate and Congress in this country, 21, that all these people have to deal with. And so for me, when we say like, grow a pair, have a spine, do something, I'm like, well, we have to figure out as a constituency on a national level, how to get those fricking laws overturned.

1:04:18Because unless we get money out of our elections, this is only going to get worse. and the uglies, the Donald Trumps and the J.D. Vances who will literally sell you and your family down the river for a buck are only going to get worse. And the people who we thought had a spine are only going to get more turtley, which by the way, I'm convinced is why Mitch McConnell looks like that. His dad is putting him on the inside out because he's a spineless sack of shit. Like we have to figure out how to change some of these things by our sheer numbers. But part of the problem is everyone is so algorithmically separated now that they think anybody who doesn't agree exactly with them is one of one and stupid.

1:05:02And they think that they're right. And that's why I get obsessed with the numbers and the stats and the years that the laws were passed and the bills changed and dah, dah, dah, dah. Cause I think it gives us context to why this shit is happening. and it helps us understand how. And then we can really see how it's literally along the calendar timeline, all been by design. And we can get a little less self-righteous about being right and get a little more activated about fixing the fucking problem. And this is why I love this New York mayoral candidate, Zoran Mamdani. He won a large portion of the vote.

1:05:43He won the majority of the Jewish vote. And this is a man who is Muslim who walked in the gay pride parade with a trans flag. He took the most marginalized members of the American public right now. They're bullied nonstop, which are trans kids. And he carried that flag. And this is terrifying for the right wing that they you see a liberal, progressive, non-lying, non-beholden, brown skin Muslim. Right. And so and he got all of these grassroots donations. And I know that, you know, it's tricky. And I 100 percent agree with you with Citizens United. The John Roberts court will go down as the court that ruined America.

1:06:26There's no question. Decision after decision after decision. But when I see the Zoran Mamdani's of the world and you look at the data and you dig into who all voted for him, it's really it gives me hope and it gives me promise because a lot of people that voted for him voted for Trump. Yeah. Which is interesting. And I think what Trump has presented to people, which all three of us know here is a lie. I'm so rich. I'm beholden to no one. Well, they bought into it. They think, you know, that that's true. And these aren't people that follow the news cycle like we do. But then when they see somebody like AOC, which had both MAGA voters and voters for her, and Mam Donnie had Trump voters and people who voted for him, what I think people like across all party lines are politicians that aren't beholden to anyone.

1:07:11Yes. And so I don't know. I get over my skis on how to fix that. But I do think that when you have a candidate that blasts out and does that, it's so refreshing that people pile on and support them and they get all of these grassroots donations that add up to be quite significant. Yeah, it's pretty incredible. And what I think is exciting about it is it feels like a reprieve from the whiplash we experience. And people say, you know what, if the system's broken, let's build a new system. It feels to me like an alternative to this idea of like, well, we have to burn it all down. Well, that's not going to be great.

1:07:50You don't want to burn down your hospitals. You want to make them better. You want to give them more funding. You don't want to burn down your schools. You want to build computer labs for the kids. Like this idea that you can leave the, you know, the tennis mismatch this way, that way, this way, that way, and just start on a whole new court is really exciting and refreshing. And I just feel like we're ready for that. It's gotten so bad. Yeah. It's gotten so bad that people are like, I'm for that. Like we might not agree on everything, but we agree on some things. We agree that children should be educated.

1:08:27Yes. Why is that controversial all at once? But it is. Okay. Sophia, let's play our world-class, world famous game. I'm sure you know all about it. Had it or hit it. Oh my God. Welcome to had it or hit it. I would hit it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. Okay. Had it or hit it. The oligarchy. Had it. Had it. Yeah. Just what, what is the version of like bury it? Had it. that's how i feel about the hierarchy yeah yeah it's bad okay had it or hit it the concept of having to come out that's complicated for me because i think the idea that people have to come out is inherently problematic on the one hand because it suggests that you have to announce that you're different rather than what is true, which is that there are spectrums of experience in the world and you just are who you are.

1:09:35But on the other side, I understand why coming out is so important culturally given where we are in the culture and in the discourse, because every person who is able to safely or has the courage to declaratively say the best and most whole version of myself is the freest version of myself and this is my freedom, I think freedom begets freedom. I think the more people that are out, the safer people are. I wish we were at a point where we could really accept the fact that at minimum one in five people in the world is queer. Right. So like, let's move it right along. Yeah. Let's, let's be a little less fascinated.

1:10:28So it's kind of a both and for me. I think that is just such a beautiful, brilliant answer that you did. I really, I think that speaks to so many people because you have all of these, we went on tour with our podcast and we were really shocked. Number one, that anybody showed up but number two we did this this meet we didn't hell we didn't think anybody'd show up for our tour and by god it was ended up being sold out but we'd go to you know all the big cities and we'd have this vip meet and greet line and one of the most unintended beautiful consequences of this podcast has been we would have these young queer or trans kids that drove three or four miles i mean three or four hours in rural america to get to the city of atlanta or boston or wherever to meet us and to say, I never thought two 50 year old women would champion for my community so much.

1:11:19I'm isolated and I feel alone and I'm bullied by my family. So thank you so much for being an ally. And I've always been just a very outspoken ally. My mother is very progressive and always spoke out about human rights. It was a part of my family identity growing up. And that, you know, comes out on this podcast with what pumps and I say. But what you just said in your answer about somebody like you coming out or some of your more prominent, forward facing public friends, it provides a comfort to these rural queer kids that are not broken. Right. I'm OK. I'm not a bad person. It's OK because this famous person just said that.

1:12:06And after we went on tour and we met all of these young, beautiful people that have been bullied by their communities, I think it's just so important because I'm with you. I hate it. I had a friend that came out and he felt like he had to go on this going coming out tour. And I thought, well, that's fucked up. I didn't have to go around and say, hey, guess what? I'm straight. You know, I get blow jobs. You know, I didn't have to do that. So I kind of felt sorry for him. But then the way you just said it, I really think what you said is so beautiful. Don't you, Pops? I do. And I kind of with you, I stick on the one side.

1:12:43Like you shouldn't have to come out. Everybody should just accept it and you shouldn't have to tell anybody. So I do. I see a nuanced version of it now that I really like. And what I think is important about being able to kind of be between two worlds, to be on the seesaw of that is that hopefully in 10 years, we're having a completely different conversation and people don't have to. But when the idea that people do is still revolutionary, we need to have a revolution. I totally agree. I really agree with your point. And after we were in all of these different states and all of these cities, it's just so important that people feel like they belong and that they're not broken and that they're okay.

1:13:30And, you know, especially the trans community is just, it's so horrible. We have a really dear friend of ours. She has a trans daughter. She and her husband have a trans daughter in Oklahoma where they've made trans care completely illegal and criminalized. And it's just, you know, it's just a really, really horrible, toxic situation in the state. meanwhile the superintendent of school of oklahoma i'm sure you've heard of this ryan waters i would like to smack right across the face oh he's the worst yeah he's he's yeah he's he's such a dick it's just unbelievable okay let's move along oh this is a good one had it or hit it women's sports oh hit it all day i have to say so pumps and i you know we have a mutual friend with you renee steps yeah the best she's the best so we so we pumps and i get all riled up because renee's always off with all these beautiful lesbians doing all this cool shit you're one of them that she's and your girlfriend she's always out doing all this cool shit so finally and i just respond to her stories like oh you're on another trip you're doing other fun stuff but you posted or maybe your girlfriend did or maybe it was renee but it was you all playing tennis in mexico and Renee was teaching you guys.

1:14:46I had capital F O M O neon flashing signs. I was so jealous. I want to be with all the power lessees playing tennis in Mexico. I want to go. I want to be invited. I want to be with, I want Renee's life period. Like I know I want to live her life. I text her that all the time. Like I want your life. What happened to me that I didn't get your life? Oh, I know. Talent. Yeah. It's kind of funny being in love with such an elite athlete and like being surrounded by our friends. Cause we were, we were somewhere recently and I looked at Ash and Renee and I was like, isn't it funny that the asthmatic theater kid literally won't run unless she's being chased.

1:15:31Like I spend all my time with literal Olympians. Totally crazy. crazy yeah and i mean you're like in the epicenter of like women's sports like when i see all of you guys on instagram it's like everybody watches women's sports and i'm just like they're all badasses like i mean and you're around all these like super athletes here's the deal i play tennis every day i'm an average tennis player at best but when i hit the court i think i'm renee stubs And as soon as my husband comes and he videos me so I can watch it, it is such a fucking shit show. It is so embarrassing. Oh, I totally get it. I feel, I'm like, yeah, nailing it.

1:16:11Renee told me I hit a great, a great serve. I was like, and then I saw the video of it and I went, cut that out of the, cut that out of the ring. Cut it out. Don't, don't do me dirty like that on the internet. But I, I get it. It's wild. And you know what's so funny when people are like, wow, why are you so in this world? Everybody forgets that back in 2015, when our girlies were playing in the World Cup, the reason I became friends with them all, the reason I went like out partying with them when we did the glamour women of the year the next year when they won and all the stuff is because I was watching the World Cup games.

1:16:48I got the snake pit, which was my favorite bar in LA to open at 4 a.m. We would all go watch. And I was Instagram storying all this stuff. And all the girls were like, why is Brooke Davis tagging us in video? And I was like, you guys are so cool. And I remember years later, you know, being at this like lunch with all of them in person when so many of us were finally not Instagram friends, you know, we were in-person friends. And they all were like, we were so gagged. And I was like, I don't think you guys get it. Like you think people who do what I do are cool. In my world, you, you gals, and then like three chefs that I'm obsessed with, you guys are the rock stars.

1:17:27I don't care about anybody who does what I do. We're all like anxious, you know, crazy circus performers. You guys have actual skills. No, I, I agree with you. I get so starstruck around athletes just because like the, the, the genetics and the physical ability to, I mean, we're talking about elite, elite athletes. We go to all these NBA basketball games, Oklahoma city, thunder champs. Let's go. And it was, And when you see them, it's just incredible. Okay, last one. Had it or hit it, the United States of America? Hit it. And I mean that for real. I mean that in the way that you get in the arena.

1:18:15You know, you stay, you get dirty, you fight, you do the work, you don't give up. I think about that Baldwin quote that I'll paraphrase it because I won't get it exactly right, but he essentially wrote about how because he loves America so much, so perpetually, so in a forever way, essentially, he reserved his right to criticize America perpetually, to essentially demand that America actually meet the promises that she's made to her people. and and for me it's like it's a it's a lifelong hit it i completely agree i mean sometimes of course i'm just like i have fucking had it as an american you get to that is the gift of being an american you do not have to love america you hear that freak show uh german miller steven miller You know, he's such a freak, a total Nazi.

1:19:18Anyway, he's always like, we're going to train American kids to love America. And I'm like, you're missing the point of America. Right. You want to brainwash people? Yes, they do. Creep. He is. He's the worst. Also, can you imagine being Stephen Miller? That guy literally walks around cosplaying Hitler. Yeah. I'm like, sir. And he's Jewish. And he's Jewish. You couldn't have found a better idol? Like, proximity to power won't protect you, my guy. Yeah. You're going to be the first to go. It's the way I feel about white women cozying up to white supremacy. I'm like, who do you think are the biggest perpetuators of violence against women?

1:19:53Those white guys you think are going to protect you. Baby, get your shit together. Yeah. It's such a good point, Sophia. It's so true. All right. I mean, I just have to say it because it's just obvious. You're drop dead. I know. Gorgeous. I mean, so pretty. And I have to say it. I've been such a huge fan. Are you fangirling? Yes. And I used to record Chicago PD when you were on it because I loved you. Thank you. Yeah. Gals, I love y 'all so much. Seriously, you want to come and play tennis? Come. You're going on tour? Pack me in a suitcase. I'll make you coffee backstage. Like, I just want to hang with y 'all.

1:20:32And we need to make it happen. Also, I have to tell you about something that goes back a little bit to the top of our conversation. and is important for you to know because you are in Oklahoma. I've been really lucky to do some work in your state with the Crutcher Foundation and all the folks who are doing the most amazing work on the legacy of what Tulsa is, particularly for Black folks in Tulsa. And one of the coolest things I've ever seen, there is an art gallery in Tulsa called the Center for Queer Prairie Studies. and they have an exhibition in this space. It's like part of the mass art complex that some very generous funders in your state support.

1:21:17And they did an exhibition on the history of queer writing, media, and art in the prairie states. And one of the things that took my breath away that you need to know about and your listeners need to know about and anyone who doesn't have the luxury of being out in particularly rural Oklahoma needs to know about, There was an artist named Pat Gordon, and he was this sort of high society portraiture oil painter guy. So like, you know, you think of a very traditional wealthy family in the South who gets their painting done. Pat Gordon's kind of not spoken, but known thing was he traveled around the South and painted queer men in drag.

1:22:05Oh my God. And these giant like six, seven, eight foot high portraits of these men in gowns and jewelry would sit in their private offices or literally in their closets at home where visitors couldn't see them, but where they could see themselves reflected. And I'm going to get emotional. Being in the room with those paintings like literally brought me to tears. So next time you're in Tulsa, go see them. They're really magical. I absolutely will. And I mean, look at that. She knows more about Tulsa than we do. Oh, not as well. I write hard for Tulsa. And I just shout out because so many of obviously we have a lot of people in blue cities and states that listen.

1:22:50But if you're a red state liberal, you really, really have to be tough and fight. And, you know, the importance of like you were talking about these people who put on this gallery in Tulsa. And it is so important in states like ours where they don't just try to bully the existence of LGBTQIA plus community. They want to erase them. And that is just a really, really dangerous place. We're going to have to go. We're going to road trip. I want to. And you and the power lessees meet us there. I'll meet you there. Oh, I can't wait. Yes. I have. We got friends we need to see. We have restaurants we need to hit.

1:23:25We're going to go on a whole Tulsa tour. Yes. I love it. All right. I love it. Sophia, it's been so lovely. Thank you so much. I just adore you both. Thank you for having me. Thank you for what you're doing, for your courage and your humor and your don't give a fuck. I just, I love you. We love you back. Thank you, Sophia. Thank you, guys. Bye. Bye. Okay. We went way over time, but she's so enjoyable, smart, fun, witty, throws out an F-bomb, did the C-word, did all the stuff. All the stuff. Which brings us back to Renee Stubbs has cool friends. She has cool friends. And we're friends now. And we're Renee's friends.

1:24:05Friends. So we're in the cool group. But she is so smart. And so pretty. Like, I've always, like, loved her. Like, I used to record that show she was on. Of course, she was a police officer on the show. So she wasn't super doll. But you have a thing for, didn't you say, Kylie? I always said I want to have sex with a cop. Yeah, I've heard that. Yeah, I have always said that. But I never have. And you recorded. So if you're looking, if you're a person in blue or what do they call them? NYPD blue or whatever. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is she is so pretty. It's like makes your eyes kind of like you can't focus.

1:24:41She's so pretty. Really? You know, she's that pretty. Shut the fuck up. You'd have to be blind. Of course she is that. I mean, she's so pretty. No, she's drop dead. She's drop dead. All right. All right. All right. Well, anyway, that's what we have going on here. And I just want to say this to everybody that listens to this podcast. MAGA support is highly fucking exaggerated online. They have all the oligarchs own all of the devices, the platforms that it's put. They have all these bot farms. This is fucking America. People typically don't give a shit who you fuck, who you love, and what you do.

1:25:25And we have to keep fighting for this country with a fuck you attitude because these people are pussies. The people who are trying to take it over are big, whining, titty baby pussies. And we have to keep fighting for this country. Completely agree. Couldn't have said it better myself. And we will see you next Tuesday and Thursday.

1:25:49I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I'm at it with that. Listen up, patriots, gaytriots, and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called iHip News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind. Pumps. Pumps. What does an eagle say?

1:26:30Caw-caw. A little bit more enthusiasm. Caw-caw. That's it. That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.