Revenge is Best Served Publicly with E. Jean Carroll

24:05Yeah. That's a bust. It's what you call a B-U-S-T bust. Kylie, what do you think about that? Oh, I'm all for this. A hundred percent in.

24:15Jen:I think it's just, I think it's like, if you're going to fuck around, then you're going to find out. Yeah. And if his wife wasn't with him at the Airbnb, he should have never left a review to begin with. Because. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. Right. I mean, he was not trying. He thinks he is hot stuff. He is big dick in the big city. He has got his girlfriend at the Airbnb. I wonder if the girlfriend was bitching about it. And so he's like, okay, well, I'm going to, you know, I mean, I don't know. I don't know what his deal is, but he's. Well, you know what he did? He fucked around, found out.

24:45Jen:Yeah. Kylie, do y 'all ever stay in Airbnbs? We do. We're trying to do that less because they actually are way scarier than a hotel room. I feel way less safe. I agree. Someone could live in the walls. They could have cameras. I don't know. I've seen a lot of reporting where the host house has these little hidden naming cams. And then they're watching the footage of you having sex or changing clothes. That's really like... That's got to be a crime, right? Well, you are America's greatest legal mind. Well, but I mean, people aren't... I mean, I get ring camera kind of thing, but being surveilled in the home, I don't think that's legal.

25:20I wouldn't think. I've also heard sometimes the host stays in the house with you. Well, that's a partial rent.

25:26Jen:so you can like rent a room on Airbnb. So like you right now, being an empty nester, you could rent out your bedrooms. Yeah. But I mean, some people, it's a way to, you know, in large cities. One of my daughter's friends is doing that in New York City and loves it, loves her host, loves everything about it. It's an affordable way to meet people, to get connected. So it's not, I mean, obviously at our stage and season of life, that's not something we do. I don't want my kids to live with me. Emily was telling my friend who was in town yesterday, yeah, my mom makes no bones about she can't wait for us to all be gone after summer.

26:02She can't wait. She likes it a lot better when we're not here. Yeah. I'm like, well, I kind of do. What'd you say? I said, I kind of do. I like my routine. I like my space. I like my dog. I like just being in charge of everything. And I like everything being about me all the time. And when I'm at home by myself with my dogs, it is.

26:22Jen:Yeah. Yeah. How did Emily take that? She knows it. I mean, I don't try to hide it that well. Yeah. All right. Well, you know, I have to say I enjoy when my kids are home. But we, listener, there's a difference. Pumps, when her kids are home, she refuses to, in real time, draw boundaries to take time for herself. No, I'm better. But for years, it's them all piled on top of you 24-7, 365. Breastfeeding all the time. Yeah. That's true. Yeah. But anyway, I'll be, I mean, you know, I'll be glad when everybody goes back to college. I think that's good. It's good for them and it's good for you, but you've enjoyed them.

27:05I've, I've totally enjoyed it, but you know, I've done that for 25 years. I'm ready for a little space.

27:14Jen:Pumps and I need to share with everybody that we have written a book. It's called Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwiches. And believe it or not, Pumps and I have not always been so rock solid. And we talk about all of our trials, tribulations, most of all our fuck ups. Yes, because fuck ups are relatable and a part of the human experience. I have gotten so much feedback regarding the book that because of my situation with the religion and addiction and all that, that people relate to that. So I do think there's something to take away that's comforting about it because we've all been in very difficult situations.

27:50Jen:And listener, what we want you to do, this is the it book for summer reading. So please get your copy of Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwiches and take a picture of yourself with the book in really great places and tag at I've Had It Podcast. And we will share your images with our summer it book. You can buy it in bookstores. You can buy it in the link in our bio. You can buy it at Target, Walmart, Amazon, et cetera. All the retailers. Happy reading and happy summer.

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29:11Jen:You know that viral red vibrator that's all over your Instagram feed retails for$89, but you get it for free. That's simply iconic. All you got to do is click the link in the episode description or head to bbvibes.com slash had it pod. That's bb v i b e s dot c o m slash h a d i t p o d. The Whisper vibes will stay completely silent. But the big question is, can you? This is an ad by BetterHelp. Listener, I have to tell you, I know we all probably share this same experience, that sometimes we just have like a lot of workplace stress, job stress, and you go home and the stress of your job goes home with you.

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30:47Jen:Our listeners get 10 % off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash had it. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash had it. All right. We have a guest that we are incredibly excited about, and it is none other than E. Jean Carroll. She's a journalist and the author of five books, including a biography of Hunter S. Thompson and the New York Times bestselling book, Not My Type, One Woman Versus a President. She has written for Rolling Stone, The New York Times, Outside Vanity Fair, New York, and Esquire. She was named one of the most influential people in the world in 2024. She throws the ball for her dogs at her cabin in the mountains in upstate New York.

31:34Jen:And considering she's so influential, it's no coincidence that she has arrived at I've Had It podcast. Let's welcome E. Jean Carroll. Oh, my God. The two of you, you just crack me. up. I love it. You brought me up. You're so funny. You were Carrie Bradshaw before Carrie Bradshaw. Thank you. But you have a bad influence on me. Now, they said, E.G., before you go on, I've had it. You have to think of things that you've had it with. And I like to grab joy. I don't like to think of the annoying thing. Well, God damn it. This morning, getting ready for your podcast. I'm not, I've had it with this team.

32:16I take a, I can't do my eyeliner. I've had it with this eyeliner. You have bad influence.

32:21Jen:Oh, we're terrible. Rotten to the core. Oh, I mean, I don't know if I'm going to get over it. I'm now seeing everything that irks me and pisses me off. Oh yeah. Let me ask you this. What do your friends call you? E-Jean? Yes. E-Jean. Okay. All right. E-Jean, what have you had it with since you've been deep diving into grievances? What comes, was the very first thing you've had it with. Braziers. I hate them. Oh, oh, okay. It's a python gripping you around your chest, pushing your chest up. So your nipples are grazing your eyelashes. Right. And then you constantly have to open your shirt and jerk it down like it's Phoenician blinds, it's impossible.

33:14And I don't even have a bosom. I have a tiny little bosom. I don't even know. Uh, uh, uh, Angie, I'm looking at you. Yeah. Oh no. Sag and dragons. It's a constant reboot. The only good thing about it, E-Jean, is that when I go somewhere, I can put all my items that I need. I don't have to take my purse. I can put my credit card, my phone, my vape, everything in my bra so that I'm hands-free. That's the only thing about it. But if I don't have on a bra, my boobs, they're hitting my knees.

33:44Jen:We've got apples in a tube sock situation over here. Yes, for sure. E.G. One time, peak COVID, peak COVID, we're heading to Mexico, right? And we're sitting in, our planes have gotten delayed. So we're all scattered all over the flight. And I look over at Angie and she's sitting next to this woman who's like double masked up, right? And all, next thing I know, her, she takes off her bra all the time, particularly on airplanes. This bra comes out, slaps this woman who's clearly a germaphobe with two masks right in the face. And I could just, I could feel the disgust. And she's just like, oh my God, I'm so sorry.

34:22Jen:And then she's hitting her vape right on the plane. And that's just kind of how she rolls. Oh, yeah. You're bad. And wait, and then you, what is the title of your book? Oh, I'm glad you asked. Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwiches. available at your local bookstore like i said bad influence bad influence i mean that's a genius title thank you and here's the end you live up to it you live up to it so i'm just saying um i should not be around the two of you because bad combination i'll tell you what we're a lot of fun you know you know what i can you know what i see eugene you're making these declarative statements y 'all or a bad influence.

35:10Jen:I don't want to be around you, but I can tell you're dying to get right here in the middle. I mean, Barack Obama, I tuned in the other day and you've got Hakeem Jeffries on your show. And I'm thinking maybe everybody should title their book Shit Check. Maybe this is the secret. You want Hakeem Jeffries on your podcast? Well then start title in your book. Let me see. With the cuss word. Life is a lazy Susan of shit sandwiches. I mean, that is, it's genius. It's genius. Well, thank you. You know what I think it is. I think it's people are really just in the post Trump era. I just want authenticity, you know, that especially combine that with a split screen of all the influencers on social media and this toxic positivity, sometimes it's okay to be in a bad mood.

36:07Jen:Sometimes it's okay to say, I think that inspirational quote is stupid. Sometimes it's okay to feel frustrated because you have to feel it to get to the other side of it. And so that's kind of, we call our little audience asshole island. You know, we're a bunch of cynical optimists is what I would say. Yes. And I think you're doing a lot of good. I think you're helping people get off their lazy asses and stand up and maybe leave their houses, maybe actually leave their houses and start to organize. I agree. We have to. We have to. We've got to. We've got to. E.G., when we were emailing with you before, you've got to dive into this whole thing about you've had it with people telling you that they're not getting closure.

36:58Oh! No, no. You know, when the chap does not text you back, that is closure, right? When you don't hear back from the company you wanted to work for, you've had the job interview, you hear nothing, that is closure. but if you're dying for closure you're just dying for closure then text that chat and say screw you it's over i'm done done if you want closure you shut it down you close it if you want closure you close it now this is symptomatic of what's going on right now in the country we all want closure from Donald Trump good God I know and all we do have you noticed is sit around and bitch about it we want to shut him down if we want to close him down like we were just saying we have to be the ones to close him down we you Angie we have to be the your your listeners we have to be the ones to shut him down, to close him down.

38:22There's one enclosure. It's it doesn't work. We have to close him down. We have to be the ones.

38:29Jen:I completely agree. And I feel like, you know, we have a large audience, a lot of LGBTQ plus people. And the thing that I see about this MAGA movement that bothers me is, you know, Trump's not a spring chicken and he's not in the best of health. so you know the clock's ticking on that thing right you know oh no he's gonna go to 100 no no no 103 104 that's what i tell her and she gets so mad at me i'm like no no he's he's here for he's here we no he will be he's gonna be emperor he's here unless we shut it down jennifer and she's gonna live post 100 because mean people live forever no mary trump's my good friend i love her oh empress she's been on the pod before oh i gotta look up that episode it's great it's great yeah um so she's gonna live forever and we've talked about her family donald's gonna live forever we have to close him down that means after your podcast, we actually stand up, get off our lazy asses and walk outside and look to see, maybe organize a little something with our neighbors.

39:45We just have to start, right? I mean, micro level.

39:49Jen:I think, you know, we talk about this a lot because people ask all the time, what can we do? What can we do? And when you think about that, you think of something big, but what we advise our listeners to do is there are small things that we can do. Like if you know somebody that's an independent, that's the most helpful person to talk to. Somebody who's voted both ways, maybe out of the three times they voted for Trump a couple of times. So that's the most helpful person to talk to. And I think about you need to make the case for humanity and humanizing people. Because what we were talking about before you came on is the MAGA movement, at first they're like, okay, we want to deport people, right?

40:24Jen:And so they want to deny them due process. All of that, set all of that aside. But now that's not enough anymore. Now they want them eaten by alligators. So we have to be allies with our brothers and sisters of color and that maybe don't speak English as their first language to humanize them to say, these people are human beings. They're not criminals. And they're escaping violent, you know, dictatorships to come here to work, to do the work that your fat ass won't do. And so let's help these people and support these people. we need to start painting a picture of humanity and defending humanity.

41:01Jen:And that can be done on a person to person level, I think more effectively than the large picture of, you know, a big giant organized march, which is also helpful. I like the idea of giving our fellow humans dignity. Right. Dignity. They crave it. That's why he's so attractive because they feel like they belong to this cult, right? If we give them the dignity of recognizing that they're valuable human beings, I think you're onto something. I think that is psychologically the key. Not giving them facts because they can't hear facts. You realize that half the country does not know that Donald Trump was held liable for sexual assault.

41:45Half the country does not know that. Half the country does not know he has to pay me$83.3 million. They don't know it. It's not their fault. They do not know it because we have, you know, the Berlin Wall in this country with, you know, the Trumpers here and the, okay. They just, their Facebook feed doesn't tell them, they don't listen to your podcast. You know, they don't read the times and they just, so it's up to us and they won't listen to facts. They just won't believe it. So dignity. I like your idea. We treat them like human beings and we give them a place to belong because they need to belong because

42:29things aren't so good right now and they're feeling that. So if we do that, I think we're on the way back. I think that small step is brilliant. Yes, I agree.

42:41Jen:Can you share any, during the lawsuit, were you ever in the court with him? Or no, did he just send lawyers? No, no, no, no. My book, Not My Type, is about the two trials against Donald Trump. It's about how an old lady, 81 years old, beat Donald Trump. And if I can beat Donald Trump, anybody can beat Donald Trump. No, the book is a high comedy. We've got to get it. No, it is a high comedy. I was surrounded by characters that Jonathan Swift himself could not have created. And so, of course, he was in the courtroom. We were sitting so close that if I reached back like this and leaned, I could have grabbed him by the hair.

43:36I wish it was. Plus, I wish, oh, listen, we did worse, though. I did much worse than grabbing him by the hair. But it was, I could hear everything he was saying. He was belittling his defense attorney, Alina Hobart, her squire. She is the worst. Oh, she's beautiful, though. She is beautiful. She's beautiful. And I hate to tell you, Angie, pumps, if I may. Yes. she is wildly intelligent she just didn't know diddly squat about the court she just didn't know but don't under don't underestimate alina haba esq she is she is she has cheekbones like tulip bulbs she has eyes like a baby seal she wore in court a diamond as big as a ritz cracker and Trump would sit at that defense table with her and belittle her.

44:43Wow. And say hiss and spit and moaning, groan at her. He'd say, stand up, stand up. Of course she's standing up. She doesn't even know why she's standing up. And my attorney, Robbie Kaplan, everybody stand up and salute. Yeah, she's amazing. Along with Angie, one of the great legal minds of the generation. That's correct. We cannot compare those two for sure. So we were stunned that she defended him as brilliantly as she could. The jury was mesmerized by her voice. Oh, she has a magnificent voice. It's very loud and terrifically arrogant. One of the things was she tried to convince the jury that I accused Donald Trump of sexual assault because, get this, I wanted to be famous for telling the world that Donald I was so dumb as to let Donald Trump sexually assault me.

45:49That was her thing. And so one of her main arguments was penis tweets. She found tweets that I wrote. I was an advice columnist for Elle for 27 years. You were famous. When this went down, you were the one in the public eye. He was just calling to the top. Well, but she used those tweets where I was advising readers about that. Occasionally a penis. And she would get up and she'd apologize. She'd stand up. She'd say, I apologize, ladies and gentlemen. I apologize. I'm deeply embarrassed. I have to do it. And then she'd introduce a penis tweet. So that's Alina Haber-Escar. I love the occasional penis advice.

46:36You've got to have it. We all need it, right? We all need it.

46:40Jen:Oh, I can't. So is your book already out? Girl, where have you been? It's number two on the bestseller list. Okay, I'm getting it immediately after this. You know, I just get so knee deep in this new cycle, E.G. And, you know, I'm just. Do not worry about it. Do not. It's also number one in audio books for women. I'm leaving. I'm leaving town at the end of this week. And that's going to be my summer vacation. But I can't wait. OK. Wait a minute. I heard you on break talking about the kids being home. And Angie actually said the phrase, it's like breastfeeding 24 hours a day. and my kids are adults i know really eugene she had this mothering uh over mothering it was it was something to behold her children and people think we're joking about this she made her children drink out of sippy cups until they were 16 and 17 years old 16 was the oldest because they spilled water and i just was like i can't clean up spills all the time 16 was the oldest though it didn't go into 17 not that that's better I'm not saying that's better oh my god and you're a divorce attorney the original we like to call Donald Trump a titty baby because you know he's always whining 60 Minutes is mean to me Fox News is mean to me CNN is mean to me everybody's mean it's just this non-stop titty baby he would come out During the trial, he would be in the courtroom.

48:13After the trial, he would always go and talk to the press. And one time he stood there and said, I'm the one who's been damaged. I'm the one who's been hurt. I should get the money. I deserve the money. He looked like St. Sebastian tied to a tree with arrows shot through him. It was, that's what he actually thought. That's the complaining, the bitching, the moaning. I don't know why people don't get tired of it. They just don't get tired of him crying and whining all the time. The greatest hits, Russia, Russia, Russia.

48:53Jen:I'm just like, shut the fuck up with your whining and complaining. It's bad enough when a toddler does it, but at least our brains compute. They're a toddler. They don't know better. You're a grown ass man. shut the fuck up with the complaining and i guess he's like the weak man's idea idea of a strong man so they just very strong they just jump on jump on this grievance train oh to me it's so off-putting yeah hearing somebody complain all the time no no he's a strong man he's uh when we were doing jury selection we did mock juries before the trial we held a trial before the trial before mock jurors.

49:35And we discovered that the men love a strong man. We also discovered that all the mock jurors agreed that, yes, a sexual assault could happen in Bergdorf in 1996. And yes, one of those people would be Donald Trump and one would be E.G. and Carroll in 1996 in a Bergdorf dressing room but there was one thing they all disagreed on they all thought that i was begging him for it see i think this is really telling because i think this is the way why he gets away

50:16Jen:with so much impunity because he unlocks the worst impulses of men and then he unlocks the worst impulses and a lot of men think oh everybody wants to have sex with me i'm so great You know, the delusions of grandeur. Then you have the women that suffer from internalized misogyny that support this type of thing. But he unlocks everybody's worst impulses. And I've never in my life seen a person that once he impacts their life, they become worse human beings. Like, look at Marco Rubio. He was a right winger and a Republican. But now he's like, you know, just a horrible person. I never thought Ted Cruz could be any more worthless or any less fuckable than he is.

50:59Jen:But Donald Trump made him even more so, E. Jean. It's unbelievable. We love we changed. We changed our argument totally after the trial. We Robbie was going to present the case. She chose our strongest, most macho male lawyer to present our case. And we had seven men on our jury. Seven. It was. The women all believe me, the men like, you know, so that we chose Mike Farrar, the duke of Farrar, who was so manly and so wonderful. Well, we ended up winning. So, you know, it are two times. Oh, hello. So I'm so glad you reminded me of that. The strong man, the strong man. We want a strong man as a leader.

51:56I guess it's inside of us. I guess it's an atavistic thing. Everybody loves a strong man. I don't know how we fight this, except you are just shutting him down, Jennifer, a few minutes ago with your you had it thing on Trump. if we would all just go outside and say that you know 10 times a day maybe we could get something

52:16Jen:done yeah i do i think on a personal level if you're around a trump or say god he's such a whining baby i've never heard somebody cry so much no wait that this is an idea why don't we all say what you just said and we'll just say it at certain times a day we all go out at a certain time we all scream it and then go in the house that's a great idea and we could do the exact same post you know because a lot of people don't leave their house they're just on their phone all the time we all did a coordinated attack via social media because we all knows he can't get his phone out of his pocket because he's bored to tell let's do this yes everybody posted exactly this time donald trump is a whining titty baby all he does yeah okay do it right let's do it let's do it i think you should step up action angie and jennifer you should step up and lead this.

53:03We will. We'll organize it. It's like banging the pans during the pandemic. Yes. I think it would get everybody some hope too and fill a sense of unity.

53:15Jen:Okay, guys, when Pumps and I started this podcast, it seemed like we had to figure out everything on our own. Scripts, show lineup, setting, filming schedule, logos. It was so overwhelming. And every day seemed to introduce a new decision that needed an answer that Pumps and I had no answer for. So we had to find the right tool that helped us. And what helped us was Shopify. They simplify everything. And it is such a game changer for millions of businesses. And Shopify is our absolute favorite partner, and we would be nothing without them. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world.

53:56Jen:And 10 % of all e-commerce in the United States from household names like Mattel and Gemshark to brands just getting started. If you're ready to sell, you're ready for Shopify. Listener, turn your big business idea into with Shopify on your side. Sign up for your$1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash had it go to shopify.com slash had it again that's shopify.com slash had it listener i don't know about you but as soon as the temperature starts rising i'm ready to swap out anything bulky and uncomfortable in my wardrobe and i start immediately with bras and i have to tell you i have found the best bra from honey love it is called the silhouette bra It's all about staying cool, comfortable, and I feel so supported.

54:54Jen:And Honey Love's innovation with their bras, typically when I get home from work or playing tennis, I cannot rip off my bra fast enough. I've been noticing since I've been wearing the silhouette bra from Honey Love, I get home and then when I go to take a shower or put on my pajamas, I'm like, oh my God, my bra has been on for like three hours. That's how comfortable these bras are. And Honey Love isn't just about bras. They've got shapewear tanks and leggings that are just as comfortable and supportive. Honeylove's best-selling Super Power Short is a must-have. It has targeted compression technology that distinguishes between areas where you want more support and areas that you need less compression.

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57:09Jen:It's the home search you've been searching for. Go to homes.com today for home shopping the way it should be. Homes.com. We've done your homework. Okay, E. Jean, we're going to move on to our mega hit game. It's called Had It or Hit It. Oh my God. Welcome to Had It or Hit It. I would hit it. Had it. I hit it every day, sometimes twice a day. Okay. Had it or hit it, dick pics. Girl, you know, if I wanted a dick pic, I would like to receive a dick pic. But it's like the cat bringing in a dead rat and dropping right in your lap. So I've had it with dick pics. Had it. I mean, what's amazing to me is I have gotten just a very few in my life.

58:06And then I've had friends send me theirs. and i'm just like what the fuck did they think that your response is like oh baby i want to come ride it i mean like it's so shocking wait hold up you've received dick pics yes just one what it was on instagram like a direct message what somebody's dming you dick pics on instagram a long time ago when i first got an instagram i don't even know who it was like it wasn't somebody i knew it was just like a rando no that's right random dick pics that's right it was just like I was like so terrified, but then I have a girlfriend that gets them all the time and she'll send them and we're all just like, she'll send them in a group text with no warning.

58:46And we're just all like, Jesus Christ, why did you put this in here? Well, we know why men send them because they think that women are wired like they are. Men think they would like to get a picture of our breasts. So what we'll do is here's a gift. I'll give you this and then you'll give me a picture of your vagina. That's how they think. They just, if it, you know what, if they'd send us a dick pic of a dick we know and that we have foot warm feelings towards, that would be a nice dick pic. But not a random like Angie received. Not a rando. No. So terrifying.

59:27Jen:Okay. Had it or hit it, Aphrodite. Oh. Love it. Hit it. Aphrodite is the name of my shotgun. which I, uh-huh. Yep. Somebody did their research. Yep. Yep. Old Aphrodite sits by my bed. That's what I do. Yeah. Do you target practice or anything with your shotgun for kicks? Well, I haven't recently, but I have, of course, because I have to know how to shoot. Right. Because they were coming after you like crazy. I mean, it was terrifying. Yeah. Hence Aphrodite. Aphrodite. Okay. Had it or hit it, revenge. Well, I think we've got to...

1:00:18I think we've got to hit it. I think we've got to hit it because I think this is the last stand. It's being torn apart at the seams, our country. Yes. Now, are we going to sit still for that? No. we have to have a little bit of iron in our guts and what gives that feeling revenge i agree okay had it or hit it cheerleading oh can't you tell look at me i'm sitting on a ball right now

1:00:51Jen:keeping your core all tight wait pump the brakes throughout the filming of this whole podcast you've been doing a cord exercise yeah yeah yeah i'm doing this ladies i'm doing this that's what i'm doing i'm doing that's impressive eugene that's impressive i don't have great core strength but that i'm impressed no and also it gives the energy it gives the energy yes i loved you i was get ready to fall and bend to me miss cheerleader usa oh my gosh that's royalty ladies ready okay i mean wow you know 1964 a trailblazer at that you know pumps here was uh all-american cheerleader her cheerleading camp and had a hyper extended toe touch back in the day Back in the 80s.

1:01:49Yeah. Wait a minute. Angie, what? This is the two of us. I knew we were bonded, E. Jean. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. You can do the toad. Now, which one? Back in the day, we called him, I think. A Russian. A Russian is what we called him. Yeah, we called him Russian. And then there was the tiger with the hands behind you. You touch the legs behind you when you do the sea jump. Yeah, no, I never did that. What about a herky? Did you do a Herky? Oh, a Herky. A Herky came to our cheerleading thing. Herky Herkimer. Wasn't that his name? Herkimer. Yes. Herkimer. I did not know that was real.

1:02:26Jen:Yeah. That's why it's called the Herky because the guy that invented it, I think his name was like Herbie Herkimer or Herky Herkimer or something like this. Yeah. He's from my era. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was the contest was down in Cypress Gardens, Florida. And part of the Miss Cheerleader USA contest was we modeled. Are you ready for this? southern gowns shut up so it was a pageant where you did cheerleading and then models yes i love it that is some drag queen shit right there i mean that is straight up drag show i'm here for it i won that man oh i bet you did she wasn't fucking around she went down there she got took names kicked out and we water skied we watered that was another thing in the competition yeah no not in the competition but part of the uh you know thing they got let me ask you this the water skiing were you doing like a pyramid like well that would be the thing but you know half of us could barely get up on the ski so that we did that but they would yeah the water skiing was part of the pageant.

1:03:39It was brilliant. Oh my gosh, that's hilarious. I love it. I got a big scholarship. Oh, wonderful. Excellent. No, and it was the first national championship that Indiana University had ever won. So I was like... Oh, you were hot shit. You were a big bitch on campus. Yeah. Oh, you have no idea. I'm walking around there. HBIC. Yeah, that's it.

1:04:09Jen:Oh, I love it. Okay. Had it or hit it, Jeff Bezos.

1:04:15Boy, I am divided on Jeff Bezos because he's done so much good. He's put books in the hands of so many people who never read before. I mean, your book has been an Amazon bestseller. Your latest has been an Amazon bestseller. And so it's providing you with income so you can feed your families. so Angie can breastfeed 24 hours a day. No, I'm just, I'm upset about his dark turn. Yeah. Yes. I'm just very upset about it. It makes no sense. I just, I mean, Laura Sanchez's boobs make more sense than Jeff Bezos turning dark.

1:04:57Jen:Here's the thing, E.G. This goes back to my point when you were talking about the male jurors. something about trump unlocks the worst impulses in people yes jeff bezos what what does he have two three hundred billion dollars yeah he gives a shit let's say he pays 20 million dollars more a year in taxes it's not going to affect jack shit in his life but something about proximity and interacting with trump makes people worse and or his supporters the more they justify and excuse the titty baby, the whining, the immoral fucked up shit this man done. The worse they become. I've never seen anything like it.

1:05:37Jen:I haven't either. Jeff Bezos, think about it. You could leave your thumbprint on this globe as I was a billionaire and I did all of these things, but I decided to pay my employees more than anybody else and change the way we pay labor. But no, like Elon Musk, him, they call him now MAGA Mark Zuckerberg. Think about this. Mark Zuckerberg, gajillionaire, goes on Joe Rogan. I'll never get over this. I talk about it all the time. And he says, I'm just so relieved that Trump is back in power because I feel like men have been neutered in the workplace. And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?

1:06:19Jen:You neutered? Are you kidding me? the whole system is set up for you to just walk into it. It's crazy how much worse people become after interacting or. He said that. Yeah. Mark Zuckerberg neutered. Wow. This is why we're. Listen, you know that eighty three point three million dollars that I'm being given by Trump. Plus interest. Plus interest. I'm going to be given it to help women get our rights back. That's where that eighty three point three million is going. you know that's it i don't need the money you know uh that is that is not right i just stunned that mark zuckerberg said that that his reality is so war right totally the thing but then juxtapose we were talking about jeff bezos juxtapose jeff bezos with his ex-wife mckenzie salute she's donating money left and right you know what she's donating to a lot of philanthropists don't donate to this.

1:07:20Jen:She's donating to social justice causes. She's donating. Yes. And if you look at the money that she's giving and she's quietly doing it, right. She's not out in the news, having written out the city of Venice, having some circle jerk of a wedding that's just obscene. She's quietly donating. And then you look at Melinda Gates and then you look at the ex-wife or the widow of Steve Jobs. And I can't remember her name, but she owns the Atlantic. She owns the Atlantic and she's making sure journalism goes out. And so here now we add E. Jean Carroll to this list of boss bitch philanthropists that are putting their money where their mouth is and donating to the causes that really lift us all up.

1:08:06Jen:And I love you for that so much. Thank you. Well, thank you, Jennifer. Because you know what? We've got I've got everything I need. I don't need it anymore. What's what do you we don't need more stuff. Yeah. But women need us. We've lost half our rights in the South. We live there. Yeah. Oh, that's right. You're in a red state. Yeah. Oh, what are abortion rights? How are they doing in Oklahoma? There's none. None. Zero. Oh. Are you at the 13-week, the 12-week, or the no-week? No exceptions. No exceptions. Not rape, not incest, nothing. We've got to turn that around. This, we've got... No, this is not...

1:08:47How far do the women in Oklahoma have to travel?

1:08:51Jen:Well, Oklahoma is a big state. It's a big state. So they have to travel to either like New Mexico, Colorado, or Kansas. But here's what's so tragic about these laws. Is there not an attack on, Angie has a daughter. I have two sons. She has a couple of sons too. But out of the two of us, there's only one daughter. If her daughter has an uptocket pregnancy or something that she would need to have, seek care or what, for whatever her own personal reasons, Angie's going to buy her plane ticket and she's going to fly her somewhere and she's going to receive the care she needs. So this isn't, it's not just an attack on women.

1:09:26Jen:It's an attack on poor women. And when you think about what Christian MAGA Christian values. I've heard you do that. Oh, this is your thing. These MAGA Christians, E. Jean, these MAGA Christians, it is an attack on the marginalized and the cruelty. And I'm not religious. And I don't know why my atheist parents raised me in the bubble belt, but nonetheless they did. But these MAGA Christians are so antithetical to the central character of the Bible who was, he spoke out against the accumulation of wealth. He spoke for lifting people out of poverty. He spoke for helping the sick, helping the needy.

1:10:05Jen:And then you look at that dipshit Moses Mike Johnson, the most religious speaker of the house we've ever had. And he votes for that abomination of a bill, which is this whole MAGA movement is an attack on the poor. And if I were a Christian, I would be so furious at these MAGA Christians for. But they don't know it, Jennifer. They do not know it. It's not their fault. They're in their news bubble and nobody can get through. too. That's why, as you say, as you saw the facts and I get through treating them with dignity and then offering them a way out of this cult where we see them will help. So your first idea, that's what we do because it's happening all over the world.

1:10:52You know that. Yeah, no, no. It's happening everywhere.

1:10:54Jen:But there's also been, surprisingly, and this has given me some hope, there's also been ever since this acceleration of Trump's second term. There's also been a Trump backlash globally, where countries that were heading kind of towards an authoritarian, those authoritarian wannabes are losing. So I'm hopeful that we can find the humanity that connects us all because it's just, you know, it's so crazy to watch. I talked about this earlier, we were filming, you know, you go about your life and you hear a song that you like, and you're kind of dancing in your car or something you're throwing a ball with your dog and then it hits you like alligator alcatraz like oh what we're doing that like yeah no and then it hits you and then it's this really weird slow march into fascism and authoritarian authoritarianism because so much of my life can feel the same and i'm doing the same thing it is the same it your life is the same right meanwhile Well, in L.A., they're dragging fathers who are hardworking away from their children.

1:11:58The guys are wearing masks, and they've got bulletproof vests on. We don't know who they are. They come in and drag fathers away. Then they drag their mother away. The kids are left with nobody. And we're not, everybody in the United States is not out marching. I'm really, God, are we fucking lazy. I'm telling you, we've got our phones, and we've got our entertainment. We're watching Netflix and we won't go out because his father is being dragged out. You know, we just put it down. We got it. No, it's something's the matter with Americans. We're been entertained into. We're hypnotized. We just don't stand up anymore.

1:12:44I you know, it's just amazing. I mean, really.

1:12:50Jen:OK, your very last one. had it or hit it, the United States of America? Oh, my favorite country. Oh. I love the U.S. And I wish her well. She's under attack. That's true. I agree. But here's the thing. I am an old lady, and I beat Donald Trump twice. There is hope. There is hope. I completely agree with you. E. Jean, this has been one of my favorite podcasts we've ever been. I just adore you and am just so in awe of your bravery and your positivity and just the overall energy you get put out into the world. And thank you for going down a little bit of a cynical track with us. Oh, I don't know if I can get my old self back.

1:13:41I have to go find the old E. Jean. We need her. We need her. I don't know. Angie, what are we going to do? The dog is staring at me like, who are you? Who's this bitch?

1:13:57Jen:Angie, thank you so much. And listener, you can go get her book, Not My Type, which I'm going to do immediately after recording. Thank you so much. And we'll be in touch to coordinate our online protests. Yes. Got to do it. That's what we're going to do. We're going to do it. This is brilliant. We can start it. Why not? Why not ask? What else have we got to do? That's right. All right. Have a great, great week. And we love you. Thanks, EG. I know. We loved having you. Bye. I loved it. Bye. L-O-V-E, exclamation points, bold print, underlined, italicized. Okay, here's the thing. She was the big deal during the time that Donald Trump sexually assaulted her.

1:14:43She had to call him, ask EG. It was like putting dear Abby to shame. I mean, it was like the cool Carrie Bradshaw column. Yeah. Like she was able to talk about penises and stuff. She's smart. She's funny. She's a badass. Fucking looks fantastic.

1:15:01Jen:81? I think 82 now. She is so attractive. Attractive. I mean, and then what about that razor shoulder? And she did the whole thing on an exercise ball. That's unbelievable. And then just throws out funny lines like I give occasional penis advice. Yeah, I was about to follow. over in my chair. It was just so dry and the way it was, you know, as one needs to. Sometimes it's occasional penis device. All right, listener. Speaking of books, not only get E. Jean's book, get ours. She was so sweet to have researched that. Life is a lazy Susan of shit sandwiches. Pumps, tell them. We will see you next Tuesday and Thursday.

1:15:40Jen:I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I'm at it with that. Listen up, Patriots, Gaytriots, and Natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called iHip News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind. Pumps. Pumps. What does an eagle say?

1:16:21Caca!

1:16:22Jen:A little bit more enthusiasm. Caca! That's it. That's, that's... Caca! That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.