635 - This Shouldn’t Annoy YOU… But It Does

27:04why does it know all this like this unlikely to have a longer second toe I don't they're just like that I feel like some of this is a bit of gas work unlikely to find love yeah hair loss say them all these are great likely to get motion sick I get classic all the time I wasn't on the way here were you? yeah I didn't like it I wasn't feeling good I don't know that did you know that psoriatic arthritis may progress over time and could cause permanent joint damage if left untreated?

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28:34I'll be moving in. Let's get started. Sorry, I think there's been a mistake. I bought it from Carvana. You what? Yeah, great price. I even have seven days to love it or return it. So there's no... No, no buyer's remorse. More like buyer's rejoice. I guess I'll let myself out. Congratulations. I mean it. Buyer's rejoice. Buy your car today on Carvana. Limitations and exclusions may apply. See our seven-day return policy at Carvana.com. Gray roots entering the chat? Uninvited? Garnier's got you. Garnier Color Sensation Root Retouch covers up to 100 % of grays in just 10 minutes. No ammonia, no mess, and the color lasts up to four weeks.

29:13It's as easy to apply as shampoo. Plus, it's vegan and cruelty-free. 10 minutes. Sensational color, sensational price. With those savings, your next girls' night is basically free. Find your perfect match at walmart.com or at a store near you. Unlikely to be an optimist. It's hard around you guys. Yeah. that's fair you're not an optimist either are you no i'm not higher pain tolerance that's a lie that's i'm weak oh yeah i can't even have my hair like when a tweeze hurts oh really yeah i'm really i'm a little bitch for pain right so it doesn't know everything it doesn't uh less agile okay Right.

29:55Less flexible. Picky eater. Oh my word. You love all different types of burgers.

30:08Unlikely to remember dreams. I don't often. Slower reflexes. It's to be an obsession, mate. It's to be an obsession. Unlikely to experience runner's high. That's correct. What is runner's high? What? What is runners high? That's correct. I'd run it, but I don't enjoy it. You're after you do, though. Yeah.

30:33Yeah, less speedy when playing sports. That's all right. More difficult to develop good technique in sports. That's so specific. That's a shit of football. And they're all negative. Can't jump by. Can't run by. With running, it says you're more likely to be an endurance runner than a sprinter. I'm better at longer distances than I am running fast. Non-sneezer when you look at the sun? I don't sneeze when I look at the sun. How does they know this stuff? Who sneezes when they look at the sun? What's that about? Do you? Sweet sensitivity, extra sensitive. That's why I don't like chocolate that much.

31:14Likely to be ticklish. Mad ticklish. Are you? Yeah. Not a nap taker. I very rarely nap these days. I did for a while. I used to nap all time. What? Very rarely nap these days. Very rarely nap. I'm likely to run. That's called a sleep. If you nap for a while, that's called you going to sleep. But yeah, there's a lot. How much is that to do that? I don't know. Ariane got it for me for Christmas. You're going to do it, aren't you? Yeah, I'm going to do it. I don't think it's mad expensive. What do you do? Sperm in a box? Yeah, give it to me. I'll sort that out for you. No, I think it was spit. Just spit in a tube.

31:51Oh, that's easy. Likely to have a unibrow? Just sort of had to pluck it. Yeah. There's so much on there, though. Mate. Likely to enjoy watching sports? I enjoy a sport watch. Likely to develop all four wisdom teeth. That one gives me absolute nightmares. Yeah, it's not enjoyable. That probably doesn't hurt at all, but you've just got a really low pain pressure. Probably. Yeah, so I cannot believe how much it's given me on all of that. But yeah, look. Parent, child. My dad. It's come up. What's that mean? 1886 people? Are in his family tree as well. So apparently someone in his family has created a family tree that he's in and she's got his DNA for it.

32:29So now it says, it says 3 ,430 something shared, 50 % shared DNA. What does that mean then? He's half my dad. Oh. My mum's half my mum. Like together they'll be 100%. Your mum's not half your mum. Your mum's 100 % your mum. Full mum, half my parent. Yeah. Yeah. So there we go. I wouldn't even mind 10 % of your mum. What? I wouldn't even mind 10 % of your mum. What do you mean? Just a little bit of your mum from time to time. You're going to see her soon. Good. That's what I want. More than 10 % then, isn't it? That's all of it. What are we doing today, then? There we go. You big fat slow cunt.

33:07Can't even argue anymore. DNA proves it. Yes. Science has proved it. Yeah. But that also shows if I do well in things, I'm defying the odds. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. or that's a load of shit. You do yours. I'm so intrigued. That's the best part of it, isn't it? That is the best part of it. So today we are going to do part two. This shouldn't annoy me but it does. Last time we'll discuss the things that annoy us. This time it's all about you. So this is This shouldn't annoy you but it does. Can you remember the jingle? It's like a grind or something. Yeah, it was like ooh Oh, I don't mind it. Oh, that's a grinder.

33:52Okay, something like that. Something like that. Can I do a new one? Yeah. Yeah, please. Because that was for us. What do they want? Okay. Staring at the bottom of a poo. No. Hang on. That's changed. Straight to the poo. Staring at the bottom of a poo, discussing things that annoy you. I really don't think we should do that. I'll do a different one. For the sake of the show. I'll do a different one. Yeah. Oh. Oh, what's on the spot? Struggling. Right, annoy you. Annoy you. That's annoying. That's not annoying. Okay. There we go then. I crumbled under pressure. Yeah, you did. Okay, first one. Get me home.

34:32So these are things that... Just say it. Mundane things that annoy you lot, basically. I get really pissed off when I see a celebrity's Instagram or social media still posting photos or doing updates but the celebrity has been dead for years yeah yeah is it their family i don't know but like michael jackson's still posting isn't he yeah well he's not is he but i think it's to keep the brand alive because sometimes when celebrities are so big that they become a brand they have an empire and people around them closely connected to them can still be getting paid post-hormously so they're just trying to keep the money going really so trying to keep the money going is there anything wrong with that if that if your family members work so hard in their life they've become a brand should you still keep you getting paid off the back of who's getting paid agents managers dads no i don't think past death agents managers gone unless the family members choose yeah someone that's really death's gotta end the contract.

35:34I don't know. What if they said from 2025 to 2030? But I'd imagine death ends... All revenue earned by Michael Jackson Limited will... I suppose it depends if the contract says company name or human name. Right. I wonder if he's... This is such a weird thing to say, but I wonder if he's still getting record deals? Because those run out. Well, yeah. Like, would they sign a new deal? Or do they just own those songs, the labels? I'd love to know about all that. Yeah, do you think if he... If AI used him to make new songs, who's getting paid for that? The company that made the AI? Or Michael Jackson's kids?

36:20I think they'd have to agree to it. Really? I think they'd have to be some form of agreement. Is that what's going to happen? Yeah. We'll still be doing pods when we're dead. Do you want us to post on your Instagram when you die still updating? When am I down first? If you do. When you do. Leave it. Yeah. Leave it. I quite like the tragic sort of... What if your followers start... It already is. It already is. If anything, they might upturn. You'd have an initial spike. Yeah, or the Zoella fans. They'll be there. Okay. I gotta follow. Yeah, follow. Just a little kick in the... A little kick me when I'm down.

36:56Yeah. Kick me when I'm dead. Well, weirdly, they followed this one up with, I also hate it when a celebrity is gifted. stuff like why not for an ad just randomly gifted stuff like a hair transplant yeah i've got i don't think there's a i get green cola what lovely i went to an away day in forest green and had this sort of more healthy alternative to fizzy drinks it's really nice they send me they send me stuff every now and then well they've said they've said look just randomly gifted shit you're not being randomly although it's not a technical brand deal they're being gifted as a form of advertisement still they're wanting you to post about it so it's still i don't always though no i don't no no no no that's why they're doing it they they think so say say you've got your you could sell an instagram story for two grand they're giving you a product that's worth like 30 quid in the hope that they can get that post so you shouldn't feel bad for not doing it they're just trying their luck if i really like a product i'll whack it on but yeah yeah just because i want more of that product yeah but that's why they're sending it they're just sending it in the hope of a post for free essentially.

37:57There's a product I get all the time. Hell fucking all the time and I've never promoted it and it comes in fucking barrel loads. Is it Prime? No. Huel? No. It's not Prime. It's actually not Prime. I'll say what it is but you bleep it. Go on. It's called ****. Oh yeah. That shit. And you don't use it? No. You'd like it. What is it? It's all like a bit of you. Okay. Can't really say anything because he's bleeped it. I don't want it. Okay. So yeah, so I'm going to say... Gym stuff. Okay. I'd say the gifting stuff, I think, it's just a lack of understanding there. It's not random at all. They're just hoping to get free posts out of it, basically.

38:41Are they saying, though, say not us, right, but they're talking about celebs, big, famous, massive stars. Not you two, yeah. Yeah, so not anyone here remotely. We're not remotely saying anyone. Anyone in this room is nowhere near what I'm saying. Huh? Okay, no. No, like, I'm talking there's levels to this. Okay, right, we're talking. And it's like. Film stars? Yeah. Just give an example. A bit of brotherhood. Stars, they film stars. Not extras, not movie extras. Right, right, right. Yeah. But, so, they're saying, why should rich people get free stuff? Yeah. Because they're hoping that rich person will promote it to rich people.

39:22But I understand the frustration of like, fucking hell, rich people are getting free stuff now. It's rich get rich, poor get poorer. I do get why that's annoying. I don't think the poor get poorer, do they? Rich get richer, poor stay the same. Yeah. But for, like, me, I'm not rich, so give me some cola. Yeah. I'm also not sure how often proper rich big celebrities are even getting gifted stuff. They're getting that and also getting paid. If they've posted it, there's not a chance they're not getting money. I reckon they get shit, though. Yeah, but they're not posting about that stuff unless they're getting money.

39:57Yeah, I used to be against people getting sent stuff and then I started to get sent stuff. That's always the way it works, isn't it? I'm like that with everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait to see what I bring out of this Christmas. That would be so funny. And it's just the same stuff. Yeah. Okay, so what are we saying for the dead celebrities still posting? I agree. I think that's a grind. It doesn't grind me. It's weird. It doesn't annoy me. It's a slight annoyance, but if I say it's annoying, I'm a hypocrite. Why? Because I get sent stuff. No, we're saying the dead celebrities. Oh, the dead celebrities.

40:35Oh, sorry. No, it doesn't annoy me. It doesn't annoy me. It doesn't annoy me. Okay, well, you guys are overruling me. Somebody dying, passing away is tragic. A lot of people grieve over that. If you can keep them, sort of their memory alive a little bit by posting homages to their social media, absolutely fine with me. Okay. say it then that don't annoy me oh that's underwhelming no ring to it there's got the music under that or something no ring to it at all okay at all next one this is not my annoyance but my girlfriend gets annoyed because I keep leaving the toothpaste tube pointing up so she has to squeeze all the toothpaste up from the bottom when it's nearly empty that would be annoying that would be annoying I don't think it's enough to warrant a place on this show today yeah but this is the point We're doing things that shouldn't annoy me, but it does.

41:24He finishes the toothpaste, pops it down, tail down. So head up. Does that happen? The toothpaste travels like that? It's thick, isn't it? Yeah, I don't think that makes a difference. It must, because she's annoyed. I think they're getting bougie paste. Really? Liquid-y paste. Yeah, liquid-y paste. That feels less bougie. Yeah, it does, actually. They're getting shit-paste. Upgrade your paste. My paste doesn't work like that. yeah very standard paste i don't think i've ever had that issue i hate when fiona opens she does it all the fucking time when she opens biscuits right she's weird she can so first of all she can eat any meal cold any meal yeah spaghetti bolognese she'll eat it cold all right not the bolognese she's veggie but biscuits right she will open she can eat them stale that's gross so she will open a packet of biscuits and leave it open to the elements and i go in there i go why are they left like that like and i just get it flick it over put it near the wall press it near the wall yeah yeah that's the exact technique isn't it i thought you were gonna have some fancy clip but you yeah yeah you know what that's just reminded me i started to plan an episode but we didn't know if i had enough legs of unwritten rules that everyone just does but no one's ever spoken about it we have never ever spoken about that that's brilliant you if you twist the top or flip it over, press it up against the wall.

42:47Has anyone ever spoken about that? No, that's what I'm saying. Stand up. I've got a little docs list here. I've been writing a lot recently. So don't go through because we need... Oh, stand up. That's fine. Not the unwritten rules thing. Pressing a packet of open biscuits. I'll work on that. Nice. Thank God. I can now sleep. That's a potential episode idea at some point if there's enough legs in it. But yeah, completely agreed. That would annoy me. Just laugh at it again. That's really nice. That would annoy me. Stale biscuits. That is annoying, biscuits. Yeah. But what are we saying about the toothpaste?

43:26I can't relate. I think it would be annoying if it happened though. Yeah. I'm on the Colgate shit, so I can't relate. Yeah. I'm in a bit. Colgate, yeah. Are you on that? Arm and hammer. What? What? Arm and hammer. It's like a bicarbonate of soda charcoal. thing tastes like fish you don't do anything normal no okay i can't let go i can't let go of what these little rules i put on myself yeah horrible tasting toothpaste every day yeah breath sinks a tuna all day yeah yeah what are we saying about this one then that don't annoy me that don't annoy me that don't annoy me when people don't listen properly to song lyrics like I want to deep lyrics to the point that they cut me open remove my soul and dance with it in the abyss before returning to my body and you're telling me you haven't even considered what in the kitchen one more chair than you need really means and Lincoln Park's one more light what does that mean in the kitchen one more chair than you need don't know because we haven't deeped it what could that mean one more chair one more chair than we need he's got Ikea six pack there's only a family of five but you're not going to buy them individually because they will cost way more makes sense so he's bought that's what that means it's probably more like group of friends one no longer in the friend group for whatever reason chair still there for them right had some dodgy internet search histories is this person not a bit annoying who the person deep in it yeah i actually think they're a little bit of a idiot i can't tell if they're not an idiot too far maybe Maybe they're joking.

45:04Very annoying. Well, give us some of your song lyrics and we can deep them. Up late with a headache and I hate myself again.

45:15You have crushed my dreams by doing that. So mean. What's mean? Giving him his heart back? No, I don't want it back. Holding the mirror up. Don't look nice. They're not the lyrics, though. It is. You've just boiled it down to simplicity. What is it then? I'm up late with a headache. Up late with a headache. No, for fuck's sake. Let's not do it. They can listen. Right. And see how sure it is. Always do this thing. I think some songs are meant to, you're meant to listen to the lyrics. Some are just tunes. Yeah? Like feel the floor. Stop saying my songs. No, just bang it. That's what I'm saying. Just bang it.

46:02lyrics don't matter then unpeel that yeah that's a clever song what did you mean when you wrote that what do you mean I just want to feel the floor if I tell you yeah it ruins the magic does it because at the moment there's no magic so you can only go more plus EV but then you'll get the magic and lose it instantly I'd rather have it I'd rather you never had it and I made it and I don't want to say the lyrics I just want to feel the floor you're making stuff you hope somebody never experiences any magic from yeah huh you know i'm saying i don't give a shit about my songs anymore and i hate them is that what you want is that what you want to hear so for this one i'm just saying music can be enjoyed on a base level i think people who try and take stuff too seriously especially art right one when people try and take these podcasts too seriously when film critics try and review films too seriously, when you deep lyrics too much, like this person's doing, chill out.

47:05Enjoy it to the nth degree, if that's your prerogative, or just enjoy it on a base level, if you want. Yeah. I think it's what's made as well. Yeah. If someone makes something and they want you to do that, then it's going to have that in it for you. I'll tell you this now. I'm man enough to say this. Please. You know Michelangelo, the statue of the man. I didn't think you were going to go there. Yeah. Go for it, man. Yeah. I used to look at that for the years, right, and think, it's just a bloke with a tiny cock. He's got the Dean Willie. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Now I look at it, I can look at it for hours.

47:36The Willie. Why? No, like he's sort of doing this with his hand, right? You picture it. Yeah. Naked muscly man with a small knob. Yeah. He's doing this with his hand. If you look at the detail on his hand and his arm and the veins, right? Yeah. He chiseled that. The guy who made that, right? It is mental. Did that when he was 19. Yeah. Life size. every hair and not hair smooth every hand and crevice is perfect right so I don't think there was any I don't think there's anything wrong with me that sounded terrible what you were saying fuck off man it's a statue no no what are you trying to say I agree with you I consumed it as statue of the small dick yeah now I'm going beautiful craftsmanship yeah sculpted I think I don't think that about anything.

48:31Like, did you see the spoons I posted? Yep, saw it. Looked good. That building on the top has these carvings. And I'm like, someone actually got up there and did that. Yeah. Just like that. Yeah. Not for a spoon, sir. When you were a kid, you'd have gone in there. When you were 18, you'd have gone in there and had a purple rain cocktail and shat yourself in the toilets. There's nothing wrong with either way of that. Does it count as shitting yourselves if you've done it in the toilet? No, he's in the cubicle, but I shit in his pants. Yeah. I've never done that. So what are we saying about this one being annoying?

49:03I don't care if people like the lyrics or not. It doesn't affect us. Don't annoy me. That's just an excuse for them to go, look how clever I am. Artsy I am. Look how artsy I am. Look how deep I am. Yeah. That doesn't annoy me. Let me know what you think of my lyrics. Honestly, do let him know. Actually do. Yeah. Because they're crushing. I don't care. So just let me know. He does care. I really am going to get upset. Yeah. Just like all your friends, because they're depressed. Having to squeegee the shower. That's another one of his songs. Yeah. Having to squeegee the shower after washing every time.

49:33P.S. Professor Pigwidgeon best be working on his fashion this year. Fucking hell. Robbie's taking shots. What do they mean? Squeegeeing the shower. Like cleaning the glass door on the shower. Fee tells me to. And I do it for two days and then forget. I don't think you have to do it after every shower, do you? No, she says every shower. Do you? Yep. See, she put a full stop on it. Mine looks fine. I do it every now and then. Yeah, she reckons if we don't, it's going to get musky. How filthy are you, though? It's good to be house proud like that, I think. Yeah, I'm glad she gives a shit, because I don't about anything.

50:05I'm really good at being like, the room's clean, I'm going to keep this up forever now. Yeah. My new shoes. Whenever I get new shoes, I'm like, I am going to treat these. And then I've got the backs bent in while I'm doing the bins the next day. Yeah. Really bad at that. I'm bothered to put them in your shit. It's nice to have the good intention, though, isn't it? Yeah. I do that's bang on that's something everyone does you clean your room you think it will never get messy again now yeah it's so easy for it not to get messy again yeah you just have to clean things as you go all it takes is leaving one plate and then suddenly can't do it can't do it and then it stacks up I'm tired I don't want to put this pizza box in the bin that can go in the middle of the floor no that's too far for me I would always put that in the bin wait how long are you leaving it on the floor until I go and do a bin run once a week It's four days.

50:55What's the longest a bit of food has been left in your room, do you think? I had some dead skin on my... What, you eating it? On the side for a week. Went well hard. It was like a shard of glass. Off your foot. Yeah. I'm going to be sick because I've seen that. You said food. Every episode I bring this up, it's disgusting how you do that. It's vile. I've not done it for a while. I was trying to get... I don't want to relapse. I've tried to be good. So what did it go like? Hard, hard. Came off, flake, put it on the side, leave that. and then a couple of days later I went to it rock hard sharp like a shark's tooth what?

51:30you put it on a necklace I did happy Christmas yeah that's mad that was years ago but I just thought it would be funny bring it back yeah yeah yeah nice one what were we saying then about I was sticking my bogeys on my wall did you do that? did you? what? when I was younger yeah she had about 30 of them yeah she's fucking on the wall mate yeah yeah yeah what did you say? I said I used to do this big time But carry on Pick my nose Squidge them on Did you? Would you put them all in the same lamp Or just all individual? Dotted around Dotted like braille What's your mum said about that? She never knew Well she clearly did It was by the side of my bed Wasn't it?

52:06It was under the mattress She must have found it at some point Maybe she did Maybe she didn't They're still there now They're not I've moved But they could be Kids are gross aren't they? Why were you doing that? Fall has never looked Or tasted this good Sweet Green's fall harvest menu is back with seasonal favorites dressed to impress and made to be devoured. Warm roasted sweet potatoes, crisp apples, maple glazed Brussels and crave worthy flavors in the autumn harvest bowl, maple glazed salmon plate and roasted bacon Brussels side. The season's most desirable menu has returned to Sweet Green featuring fall's best dressed.

52:44Make your move. Order on the Sweet Green app. Sierra has all the best active and outdoor brands for the super athletic stuff like running gear for cruising up the trail and the super athletic stuff like fishing gear for chilling by the creek nice cast fitness apparel to push for higher reps you got this and golf balls priced so you can afford to lose one or a few head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all from athletic to athletic ish. Sierra's got it. This episode is brought to you by Palmolive. Family time isn't just the big moments. It's weeknight dinners, sitting around the table, everyone talking all at once.

53:27So when the plates are empty and the sink is full, use Palmolive Ultra. Palmolive's most powerful formula removes up to 99.9 % of grease, leaving your dishes sparkling clean. And the new convenient pump makes cleaning even easier, so you can spend less time tackling dishes and more time together. Shop now at palmolive.com Do you want me to be brutally honest with you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this is my truth and I don't want people to say it's gross. No, it's fine. I liked the feel of it to touch him on the wall. I'm not even fucking joking, mate. And that's me. I liked the feel. I liked going back like Braille and giving the wall a little rub.

54:06You'd stroke it. Yeah, I liked the feel of it. That's the bogey I left earlier. They became part of the wall almost. It was really surprising how they stayed on. Fucking gross. Fuck it, mate. You know when I whispered to him? Yeah. I said, I've never done this, but I just wanted to keep him going. Yeah. You didn't even do one? No, never done one. I don't think I've ever done that. I've never eaten a bogey? No, I haven't. I've never. Oh, that makes me feel ill. But you licked your wall. I licked the wall? Mate, I'd literally be sleeping like this, and then my hand would go down. Give a little one of them.

54:37That's a comfort thing. That is top three weirdest things I've ever heard on this podcast. The other two were mine. Yeah. I was a troubled child, wasn't I? Touching wheelies and feeling my bogeys on the wall. What's wrong with me? What was wrong with me?

54:57I'm not sure this is the place to figure it out. I'm so glad you shared that. That is absolutely vulgar. Watch the comments come flooding. I used to do bogey wall as well. Bogey wall? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does your wife know about this? No. I don't do it now. I'm going to tell her. Because I checked on the side of your mattress. No, I don't even pick my nose now. I do. Yeah, I do. Yeah, it's good. You should stick them on the wall. That's my little display at happy hour. It's my little bogey wall. So the question for that one was, is it annoying to have to squeegee your shower? It is annoying. It's annoying having to do it.

55:42But you just don't. Yeah. That's annoying. Yeah. I'm generally a very calm and understanding person, but nothing enrages me, enrages in capitals, quite like when I'm on a run and a fellow runner passes in the opposite direction and completely blanks me when I nod or say good morning to them. I totally get that some people are in the zone and concentrating, but just a nod or a quick smile surely isn't too much to ask. Once I was on a run with my boyfriend and we ran past a man in leggings. Don't get me started. jack wears leggings when he's wrong with that so it's a cunt i'm just saying they're annoyed we said good morning and he just blanked us years of annoyance has culminated in me saying a bit louder than i meant to fuck you then my boyfriend looked at me horrified and informed me that the man had in fact said hello back and i just hadn't heard him i'd like to take this opportunity to apologize to that gentleman who paid the price for all the impolite arseholes who had happened to come before him?

56:41I think this person's a narcissist. Don't. I think this person is a narcissist. Thank you for listening, though. Then please continue. Do you nod at people and say hello and say hello? I always let them choose the vibe. Nice. Yeah. Something like that. Does that mean you're staring at them? I'll run, run, see them coming in my peripheral. Little quick look, quick look. As they get there, I'll go in for the smile. If they're looking straight, I'll reject it. If they look at me, smile, nod. That's a nice smile what you just did. That was good. Ooh, not the second time. I'll write that. I'm very much a fan of just no community whatsoever.

57:18I love the tube. No one looks at each other. Let's just pretend everyone else doesn't exist. Let's do our own thing. Isn't it quite nice though? No. Wow. I think it's quite nice. On the tube when no one's looking at you? No, no. When people do give a little bit of a nod. In my mum's village you say hi to everyone. Yeah. it's people only say hi to each other one when they're on holiday and you think a british person's met another british person yeah when you're hiking yeah hiking always always yeah we're early in the morning yeah if you're on a walk yeah or whatever yeah um and this one runners joggers otherwise if you're if i go to the shop now and there's a bloke walking past down on that road out there yeah like all right he's gonna go what the fuck's going yeah that would be weird but it's i think runners because you're both doing the same thing yeah you're like look at us like yeah a lorry waves to another lorry or a taxi yeah bus driver bus driver yeah well this one we i don't even know if we want to say whether this annoys us or not we want to say to this person chill your beans chill everyone chill spill your beans chill your beans all right maybe it would be nicer about hey oh no shut up i'll tell you shut up it's only ever happened once but when i went for a run in tenerife i was gasped could not run so excited i was i was like fully perfect i could not keep going dying old old fellas running the other way and he goes come on puts his hand out to high five me we high five each other next 20 seconds i was back in it then 20 seconds yeah yeah he didn't give me revitalize me but it gave me 20 second boost and i felt good and it was nice afterwards.

58:59He really helped. I was like, that was nice that he did that. Yeah, yeah. For no reason. Yeah. Which I just said I don't like. I like community. I think you shouldn't be expected to do anything and the reason and the fact that they're getting annoyed at that is unfair. Yeah, I don't think, you'd never think negatively if someone doesn't acknowledge. No. So I think doesn't annoy me. Doesn't annoy me. No. Mixed up. When you're having a debate or argument with someone, could be about something completely trivial and you realize suddenly that you're definitely wrong and they're definitely right i could learn from that but no it's annoying i didn't want to be wrong i don't know i quite i think sometimes if i go fair enough you do do that you're not mature yeah fair i always do this yeah and i think i stick to it for too long double down and then i almost have to fake this like i'm gonna go away and think about this for 10 minutes and then i come back you know what you were right yeah whereas i knew you were right while we were discussing oh right yeah i used to have a friend who would try and gaslight it as if they were right the whole time but somehow turning it back into the thing you were saying do it with me play them i can't remember how i can't remember they'd try and convince me that i was saying the other way around and i'd be like sometimes i'd be going oh no maybe you are and like i'd really question myself and i'd get in my own head who was this someone i don't talk to anymore okay right very good at it as well right master manipulator nas narcissist that's narcissism yeah that's a great name for a wrestler master manipulator oh i think you meant narcissist no master manipulator yeah yeah they just twist twist your words into beating yourself up and twist your eyes you're doing the right thing so So this would annoy you.

1:00:54This doesn't annoy you. Because if you realise you're wrong. Yeah. It's okay if you're having a lighthearted discussion. But if you're in the heat of battle and someone does you, you're like, oh, fuck. You do feel a prick. That moment of realisation is where you go. And then you've got to decide whether you ease into realisation or whether you just suddenly go, nope, actually, you're right. Sometimes it's best to do that. I think it's almost always best to do that. If you truly realise you're wrong, but is it nice to start going well actually no no let me just have a quick think about your point yeah because you're trying to just ease it in if it was the other person I'd want them to go you're totally right yeah I don't think anyone's ever done that to me no I've never been right I might go on about what just like bogey wall yeah do you agree with bogey wall no I don't agree I hate it I hate it it's disgusting when you say I can't think of a single one where you've been right I don't really have any opinions No, you don't.

1:01:52That's the issue. When I do, they are wrong. Can't think of a time you're wrong. All right, though. No, yeah. So this one is annoying, isn't it? Yeah. Realising you're wrong. Even if you can handle it well, it's still not a nice feeling. Yeah. So? That is annoying. Shitter every time. I have no idea if that's even what I said at the start. It's hard to tell when you're doing it or if you're just saying, that is annoying. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, that's the jingle. Yeah. What I'll do from now, crocodile jingle close crocodile that is annoying crocodile jingle close thank you what's a crocodile that little symbol don't know why the bigger than what the bigger than and bigger than and that's that because on whatsapp if you do big i crocodile it goes italics podding why don't you say italics yeah i'll do that yeah okay this one's really niche i think and I'm not sure any of us can relate.

1:02:48When someone sits in my seat at the library, it annoys me. Who the fuck goes to the library in 2026? I should just sit somewhere else. I don't think you call them for going to the library. People can go to the library. The thing there is, how do you have a specific seat at the library? What, they own the seat? Well, he said, when someone sits in my seat at the library, it annoys me. I should just sit somewhere else. Who cares? I care. I don't know. I'm pathetic. I can relate this to you. What? if a group was sat at our table at the murderers you'd be like fuck's sake they're in our seats haven't been there for a while so I've lost rights but like imagine at that time peak time if someone you'd go oh someone's got that table not someone's got my table no you wouldn't you'd go up to Phil and say kick them out no I wouldn't never done that that's what this person's saying oh they're in my seat I always sit it's not their seat they should no I know that's a public place if you want to bring your own seat bring your own seat if you need if you need a seat I know someone who's got a spare one Linkin Park I thought you were going to say your old dealer Yeah I did buy one off of him Don't say old dealer without mentioning his cannabis dealer I'm a looks bad I thought you were going to say about giving a little shout out to my new dealer A complete a dealer that was off drugs completely Because no one says oh that's my dealer and you're buying shawl Art dealer Art's a good one Art would make you seem really good as well You bought the Michelangelo statue Yeah yeah yeah Alright so fee will cut that so off your old dealer.

1:04:15Oh yeah, the guy I buy art from. Yeah. What's the last piece you got again? Oh, Mona Lisa. You bought the Mona Lisa? Or a replica, yeah. I bought the real one. I put it up in my room. How much did that cost you? 48. What? Million pounds. That's really cheap, isn't it? That's really cheap, I reckon, for the Mona Lisa. That's like an average Premier League player, isn't it? I reckon the Mona Lisa. That's cheap. Yeah. I might have bought a fake. Expensive fake. Shall I see what the value, what's the value of the Mona Lisa? It must be priceless. Billions. I saw a fella dressed up as the Mona Lisa at the darts the other day.

1:04:55My friend George dressed up as Halloween as the Mona Lisa. How old is that? Did he have the whole painting or was he just... Whole painting? Yeah, it's good, isn't it? Really good. You're correct. Mona Lisa is considered priceless and isn't for sale. Its valuation in 1962 was 100 million. So that was in 1960. Which adjusts to just over 1 billion today. Okay. Yeah, they think it's worth over a billion. Who's paying that? No one. I'm glad I got a fake now. Just as good. Yeah, I've saved 958 mil. Do you think anyone else would have Mona Lisa up? Just a fake Mona Lisa up? Yeah. Yeah, definitely. There'll be loads.

1:05:33I'd have a few Van Goghs, I reckon. What? You what? I'd have a few Van Goghs. You can do. You can, yeah, and you don't. What do you mean? I'd have. No, if someone said to me I've got this really good replica I'd go for it You can just buy them prints How much are they? Well, it's a replica, mate It's a print It's going to be super cheap Maybe like 30, 40 quid Yeah, I'll do that We're just going to have like Starry Night You like that one? The vase of flowers? Yeah, I like that one It's a nice one Great Doctor Who episode Where he visits It's maybe the best one ever Cut his own ear off No, and he visits his own Have you seen that?

1:06:08Bangor, yeah Yeah, he visits his own like what would you call it exhibition because he died not knowing he was famous yeah that's sad and he goes back and doctor who and doctor who shows him and bill nye's the um like tour guide and he says what do you think of van gogh and he says like oh just gassing him up what loving him yeah and van gogh just cries fucking i wish i wish that happened in real life you want van gogh to appreciate it what yeah it's tragic he only sold one painting didn't he when he was alive one painting. Who's got that? I don't know. Do you know about this? Spenty, isn't it?

1:06:42John Cairns talks about this, stand up. Says Van Gogh only sold one painting when he was alive. That's sad, isn't it? So are we saying the person... He goes, he must have had a mate. Yeah, maybe that was a mate who bought it. That's like you listening to my songs, isn't it? Out of pity. What? Yeah. Yeah. But we do. And when I die, they're going to blow up. I know that. Yeah, they will. They will. And I'll be posting on your Instagram and I'll still be getting 10%. All my friends are depressed under like a grey picture of me you'll be posting. Yeah. Miss you so much, bro. I always love this. Wish I'd told you while you were alive.

1:07:14I do tell you that I love your music. Which ones again? Red Lights. Million streams on Spotify. One more. Let's do one more. Two million. Okay, what are we saying about the sit on the table? Two million. Sit on the seat of the library. Can't relate. Can't relate. Can't relate. No. Someone saying you're welcome after you say thank you. What? That's completely normal. Let's do some quick fires. Right, quick fires. Doesn't annoy me. Doesn't annoy me. Go. Doesn't annoy me. People getting in the shower when I want one and I was just about to go in, but I've also been sat on my bed for 45 minutes doing nothing.

1:07:47Yes, that's so annoying. Same goes for the loo at all. I've needed a wee for half an hour. You know you're going to do it, but you're just in that moment where you're like, oh, do it in a minute. And then someone suddenly goes in there and you're like, fuck, I missed my opportunity, even though you've been there. Good acting, man. Even though you've been there for 45 minutes. that is annoying can't relate what? can't relate too many bathrooms aww what do you want me to lie? oh yeah I hate that yeah but you can surely imagine it well there must be I don't know I grew up in a house where I wasn't even allowed a shower so allow me a two now please when you're driving and let someone through but they don't thank you I went into my bathroom once and the floorboards had been ripped up to be sold on eBay and I got told I can't use the bathroom anymore Cody and Hans what I remember trying to use that bathroom it was difficult at my yeah what yeah sold the floorboards on ebay I went walking in there one day footwear through the floor who's buying floorboards there's good mahogany wood that fucking hell yeah it was like a little obstacle course to get to the toilet council house as well how did you go so I'm not sure how you could do that how did you do poos yeah downstairs little cupboard toilet thing you know what I mean little one yeah yeah I had to go to Menands for a shower what was that mate when you're driving and you let someone through but they don't thank you.

1:09:07Yeah, punts. Irritates the fuck out of me. Big prick. Just that, innit? Yeah. One finger's enough. I sometimes do that when I'm not in the mood. Just that. That's enough. Do you ever... Oh. Sometimes... Yeah, both. That was too much. Can you please do that? You. You. That's you, mate. That's all you. Stop blowing kisses. Fucking hell. My dad went through a phase of sticking his hand out the window. Oh no. Fuck off, mate. That looks a bit... Yeah. Don't you? Well, not him doing it.

1:09:44So we're all agreed annoying, yeah? Yeah. Drivers who get annoyed that you don't let them merge into a lane they should have already merged into prior like everyone else. Preaching to the choir. Yeah. There's times where people should... No, there's... Some zips are correct. Sometimes, like that way, on the way home from London, Get in the queue. You're being a cunt. Get fucked. But do you know when there's two queues, you're supposed to feel bad? Queues? Yes, but we're not talking about that. All the way to the end of one. Yeah. But we're not talking about that. We're talking about very specific places where like on the way out of London, one lane just follows all the way out.

1:10:20Then there's three other lanes next to it. Roundabout at the end. People wait until they get right to the roundabout where there's a red light or a green light. And if the light goes red, they quickly cut. No, they made a mistake. They go down there too quick and they indicate too quick. you know what they're trying to do. They're avoiding the small queue. But the thing is, where the road comes off, the reason this is definitely an issue, where the road comes off, no light at all. If no one cut in, that's consistent, constant, smooth traffic. No reason for it to ever stop. They should have a sign then.

1:10:48Yeah, they do. And people just ignore it. People don't care. Terrible. So, cunts, agreed. Last three quick fire. People singing in front of me and actually trying. Yeah, that's horrible. Why? You do it on stage. You do it all the time. I think that's why I just said that. It's horrible. You're a good singer. am I yeah thanks not annoying unless it's Robbie yeah but he was getting better but in a few months it's going to be great is he yeah what do you know that he sang Chapel Rhone on the podcast as well as he can do it was it good no because he wants to then do training for three months and then he's going to sing it again and see how much better he gets that's amazing he's going to get better no training he had to put his headphones in listen to the QC and sing, I thought the bottle you had.

1:11:35That's amazing. Yeah. I couldn't look first minute. I'm really excited to hear the progression. Yeah. What song did he do? Good luck, babe. Good luck, babe. Good luck, babe. Sorry? That was better. Oh, was it? Yeah. Do a bit more. You're on it. No, no, no. No, go on. You're on it. I'm on a high. I'm on a high, Alfie. I'm going to leave it on a high. Quick when you're in there. Yeah, but prove yourself. Prove yourself. When someone tells... Oh, what are we saying about singing? We're saying, yeah, annoying. No, we're saying not annoying. Not annoying. When someone tells me to do something that I was already about to do.

1:12:06Yes. Worst thing ever, isn't it? Preach, brother. 100%. That's annoying. Okay, that is annoying. Isn't that the weirdest thing? You're literally, if you're about to do the washing up, and you're like... You don't care anymore. Preach, brother. That was good. That was amazing. You've got a bogey wall. What? You've got a bogey wall. Oh, at least I've got a bogey. they look so shocked I'm already through the air last one that is annoying that is the worst feeling ever I don't know what you're about to read but I guarantee you I find this annoying Taylor Swift's music nothing against people who listen to her but I don't know what it is her songs really annoy me think it could be repetitive lyrics and general oversaturation that being said she does have a few bangers Sabrina Carpenter is clear yeah it's correct I'd reverse that what you think Taylor's over Sabby City why I'd go Taylor over Sabby C.

1:12:59Would you? I like it. I think she's got a bit more emotion. Sabby C, not lyrics for me. To be fair, I haven't really listened to Sabby C, so I can't. Put these in order, these three. Taylor Swift, Sabby C, Chapel Rheum.

1:13:14I'd go Chapel, Swift, Sabby. What, you want to say Chapel? She's not proven. Swiftie's proven it over decades. Yeah, but at the very top. Longevity. Chapel one day, not yet. Getting sickened. I'm going Chapel, number one. Good choice. Two, I'm going to go Sabby C. Three, I'm going to go Taylor. Come at me, Swifties. I haven't listened to Taylor's recent stuff. I like that when you're saying Taylor. But old songs, bangers, our song. You haven't heard that, Ophelia? No. Oh, listen. Who's that from? Taylor. TT. Lily Allen, she go in the mix? No, TXCS. She's class. Top jaw. Yeah. Love it. Does she go in the mix, Lily Allen?

1:13:52Love it. Not in that mix. No, we're going for big American stuff. Different range, yeah. What about Onion? Onion. Onions. Selena Gomez. Don't think she's in that mix either, is she? You need to go bigger. Ariana Grande. Yeah, she's in the mix. She's probably the best singer out of all of them. I'll tell you the best one. The best one. The top two for me, my two goats. Adele. Women goats. Lady Gaga. Bang, yeah. The goats. Yeah. See ya. Bye. See ya.

1:14:22I couldn't think of another way to say goodbye. That'll do. people in public who are visibly and audibly in a great mood wow cheer up

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