651 - Stoner Thoughts (420 Blaze It)

28:52What? What? I went to you, I had much of a gag reflex. And you went, later on, we'll get that. And I was like, we'll test that out later on. I was going to say, later on, way later, near the end of the video, we met a couple of Geordie lads. Right. And obviously everyone got to choose anything we did. And we were watching Champions League in a pub. and these two lads just come over and give us our drinks and like buy us a drink because they're like we have to have whatever you give us and it was a fireball shot mixed with a jager bomb jager meister shot and it was he refused to do it bottler again yeah i'm not doing that why literally let everyone choose every element of our day but he wouldn't have a shot i'd rather a shrimp than a fucking double shot of that shit yeah really yeah yeah and also one of the lads when Jack, he was a fan.

29:40He's only human. He went, can you put a bet on for me? And he gave me his Betfair account. And he had£20 in there. And Tottenham were playing, Atletico Madrid. And I did Archie Gray to score an assist. I did Pedro Porridge to get a card. And I did Julian Alvarez to score. Put a tenner on for him. Then, because I was drunk, accidentally put it on twice. And I went, oh shit, sorry I've done that twice. he said do you want to just send me a tenner and you can have the bet and i went now and just cash it out and whatever the bet come in he won 510 quid wow and i could have uh i could have had a bit i think like drunk bets are the best way to do it because i think when you're sober you do you think like oh you overanalyze yeah you do but then if you yeah yeah i mean look down that camera and say if anyone's got a betting account get drunk and bet No.

30:27Probably not going to do it. But drunk bets are the best way to do it. I guess. Right, should we leave it there? The whole app. No. That's it. Was that shit? Was that shit? Yeah, you're really letting us down there. Happy outfathers back. Fucking hell. Oh, I will quickly say on this. Sierra has all the best active and outdoor brands you need. From athletic stuff, like a full court pickup game. Swish! to athletic-ish stuff, like a half-mile stroll. Get those steps in. And for morning hikes up the mountain trail, good pace. It's a nighttime ghost choice from the camping chair. What a twist. Whatever level of active, Sierra loves it all.

31:08Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. Propel Fitness Water. With Gatorade electrolytes, zero sugar, and vitamins, Propel hydrates better than water. to help you get the most out of your workout and get back to your best self. What propels you? Propel with Gatorade Electrolytes. Fall has never looked or tasted this good. Sweet Greens Fall Harvest Menu is back with seasonal favorites dressed to impress and made to be devoured. Warm roasted sweet potatoes, crisp apples, maple glazed Brussels, and crave worthy flavors in the Autumn Harvest Bowl, maple glazed salmon plate, and roasted bacon Brussels side.

31:52the season's most desirable menu has returned to Sweetgreen, featuring Fall's best dressed. Make your move. Order on the Sweetgreen app. Well, as we said, we didn't get to pick a single element of our day. These lovely boys, we were going past, and we were trying to find out where to go for food that evening, and Jack asked him, well, where do you think we should go? And he went, oh, do you mind if we have a few minutes to talk about it? And we're like, okay. Like they're on Dragon's Day. And they walked away from us and had a little chat with each other, and we're like, we don't know what's happening.

32:22And then they came back over. They were so lovely. And they got really excited to send us to a place called Lido or Lido. Yeah. And mate, it's the school panteen. Everyone goes on about it in Latvia. It's literally school. You go through like these little metal things. You grab a tray and a plate and then you just put your food on. Slop. And it's like everything has a price. And then when you get around to the end, they just look at what's on your plate and you pay. My dad even texted me and he said, I've got a Latvian mate at work. And she said, go to Lido. Sorry, Latvians. Right. I think you're a beautiful country.

32:51you've got plenty of scenic places and the people there were immaculate they were lovely lovely human beings with all the time in the world 10 out of 10 for people your food's shit in my opinion and also yeah I'll put you down to 38 for now on the list fucking hell behind 10x I know that's fucking bollocks above me well I'm just gonna work out who that could be but now you're doing alright right we're all caught up baby all caught up why didn't you join in? I don't know I don't know I didn't want to it started then I could have joined in halfway through oh have you been up to anything well we've done the all caught up jingle we put a lid on it what about oh sorry we never even asked him yeah you didn't add you alright go on what have you been up to we're not caught up yet we're not caught up but the thing is because we're running on this is going to be a long episode that's fine but we've done the all caught up that's done like the moment's gone we can move the goalpost yeah they can have a longer episode we're still going to do that's what I was going to say We're still going to do a theme of what we wanted to do.

33:51We'll have a longer episode. We're going to do a longer episode. If people hate you, they'll gut it, because this could be a one minute 30-er. Yeah, but they'll just turn it off. One minute? One minute 30? No, I mean one hour. They'll love you. They'll love you. Let us know. Psychoanalyze everything Jack says today. It's going to be a nightmare. What have I been up to? Right, okay, let's do this. Let's do this. Already covered Colchester's. Act natural. Yeah, he's covered Colchester's, eh? Um, covered Colchester Zoo. That was our light. We did find out what he did. He didn't go to San Francisco.

34:24went to San Francisco. Oh yes, you did. Went to San Francisco. Any dead animals? Um. Did you go with Danny? Yeah, went with Danny. Uh, we went for a brand trip. Uh, very good fun. Um, yeah, that was interesting. To be honest with you. Anything to report from that? anything to report from San Francisco. Saw the Golden Gate Bridge. Yes. Yeah. Brilliant, isn't it? Yeah, not asked. Not asked whatsoever. so I put a picture up I thought get it on the ground a few engagements to the old dashboard right get it on there and put it up he replies yeah that's me by the way pointing at me oh god oh yeah sorry that's Jack Dean right yeah so he replies to it Jack Dean with I said Golden Gate Bridge whatever Instagram put a filter on I just put the San Francisco filter on I think it was or LA LA filter oh you put the wrong one on no no LA filter there isn't a San Francisco one Los Angeles filter right when in Rome yeah you're not though you're in a different exactly that exactly that so I put that on um he replies damn no anyway why's he putting your voice on I can't what did I do a voice now did I yeah you you VN'd me right VN'd me uh and you said the colour of that bridge no because I put didn't I I put not that golden really is it the golden gate bridge yeah yeah yeah which you've got a point yeah and which you responded to it's saying the colour of that bridge was made for that bridge and I went back to him I said that is the most over 30s comment I've ever heard in my life all I've I haven't asked him I haven't asked for anything off him right he's come back give me a little fact about the Golden Gate Bridge's paint it's just so old Jack likes a little fact yeah I love a fact man I know but that just shows your age mate nah do you not like a fact did you not then turn to Danny Aarons and go Danny did you know no no So he don't know?

36:16He doesn't know. What can you voice let him down and tell him? I know, I left my phone over there, but he's professional. He's working. Because I want to know what he's got to say about that. I don't think he'll be arsed, mate. He won't be arsed about stuff like that. Not many are, unless you're over 30, which I am not. How old are you? 29. When are you 30? September. You're going to love a fact. I'm going to ring you on the 24th and tell you that fact. No, I'll tell you a fact because I'll be in my 30s. I like it. Were you not fussed by the bridge? I thought it was all right. I don't really get the hype.

36:50I really don't. I thought just, if it wasn't in so many films and TV shows, then it's just a big bridge. I thought it was incredible. If no one spoke about it, you would go past it and not even think about it either. I love a Wayne. I thought Alcatraz looked really cool. Yes. That did look cool. But that's all part of the bridge, mate. That's all part of the story. That's all part of the scene. You're on the Golden Gate Bridge. You're looking down. You've got the coastline. You've got the ocean. You've got Alcatraz. You think, wow, prisoners escaped from there and swam three kilometres to the shore.

37:21Yeah, fair enough. I think... He still doesn't care. He still doesn't care about the facts you're giving him. San Francisco, cool place, though. I did a driverless car. Got in a driverless car. I saw you did that. Yeah, driverless car. How was that? I think you were on only 300 because it got fucking views. I did a driverless car. It didn't pop up on my feed. I accidentally had to go to your page. There you go. Did a driverless car. That scares me. No, see, this is what I thought. This is what I thought. Boomer. And honestly, it's actually quite good. After five minutes, you completely forget about it.

37:52You completely forget. I got in that. Fine, happy, great. What, you forget there's no driver? You genuinely just... What, so you just start talking like there's a driver? Being on long... Oh, God. No, no, no. I just sat on my phone, chilling out, whatever. Then, right... Do you have to put your belt on? Yeah, yeah. Oh, they boot off. They boot off. Do they? They do have their belt on. I promise you. The non-existent driver. Yeah, it's got a belt on. I really wanted to take it off and see what would happen. Yeah, it's good, man. How much did it cost compared to like a normal? Cheaper than Uber sometimes.

38:22It was like fluctuating. You know how Ubers fluctuate? It was like that. But sometimes it was cheaper to get the Waymo than it was the Uber. So that's why I kept doing them by the end. Is anyone allowed in the driver's seat? I don't. I can't imagine. Why not just have a driver then? Well, I suppose... Why are you not allowed in the driver's seat? I guess maybe you could mess with the pedals and stuff. Maybe you could pay for the pedals, maybe. What? They're still pedals? they're still pedals couldn't they just take them out why is everything there but it was interesting to watch the wheel but by the end of it I then went to an Uber the next day I did an Uber because it was cheap or whatever did you get in and say you drive what are you doing no I got in this geezer was fuming right he was kicking off he was on the horn I thought I feel more safe in the robot car and he goes I said to him what do you reckon to them Waymo's and I've never seen them and he went oh I hate them but you know I hate more people who put money in their accounts and go in have you been in one I went nah not me He went, I don't trust robots and shit like that.

39:16He went, no, you're right, you're right. I was just looking out the window. Oh, you're bad, mate. But that was San Francisco. I want to know more about this car, though. Is it not, are you not just shitting yourself the whole time? No, genuinely. After two, three minutes, you're absolutely fine. Does it go fast? It picks up pace. But in San Fran, it's like, isn't it? Really hilly. And it's just climbing up, climbing up, climbing down. and I was only in it for like 10 minutes or whatever, but it sticks to speed limits. It goes to what the others are going to. Does it overtake cars? Yeah. Yeah. I only did like ones that were on the side, but it would go over and stuff like that.

39:54How did it park up? Did it reverse park? Oh, it parked up a beauty. Did it? Yeah. Every time parallel. Did it? Yeah, I knew what it was doing. Weren't messing about. It was good. That's pretty fucking cool. Yeah, I'm telling you, they're good. They're good. They are good, but they've got shitloads of cameras on them all around. Why do they want to do it? Surely that costs loads to have all the cameras and have it auto-driving. You say that, it's probably more expensive to have someone in there for eight hours a day. You'll have to pay the driver then, won't you? Once you've bought the cameras, you've bought them.

40:21Say you pay the driver€10 an hour and you do€30 an hour. He's taken€10, you're getting€20. If you're a driverless car, you're getting an extra€10. I've explained that way too. We're getting rid of humans then, though. We're not getting rid of humans. We're just saying, you be unemployed and we'll let the ghosts do it. The ghosts are ghosts! Oh, it's a ghost driving car. With his belt on. He's got it in the same drive. We'll let dead humans do it instead. Oh, right. It's 4.20. Blaze it. What are we doing? You're doing it, mate. Don't ask me. Well, I've got some... A few months ago now, maybe...

40:59I think it was last year. We did shower thoughts with our mate, Alfie Indra. So I thought today what we would do is I've collated some of the... Basically more shower thoughts, basically. Stoner thoughts. Stoner thoughts we're going to call these. Have you ever been so high that you start to ask yourself questions of the world? Because it's 420. I haven't. No, you haven't. I've never been so high. Last time I got stoned was 2017. It was. Yeah. Are we going to go Amsterdam and do a video getting high? We think of Jack and Stevie going to Amsterdam and either smoking some reefer. Ah. Or having some magic mushrooms.

41:37Oh. Although you can't do magic mushrooms over there, but you can do magic troughs. You can do troughs. Have you done troughs? No, I never touched, never dabbled. Not my scene. I kind of want to, but only in the right circumstances. I'd be really scared to do any of it. Well, I've heard a rumour you're supposed to eat them with dark chocolate to take away the taste. Yeah, and apparently if you get too high, and I think this works for weed as well, and you're like, shit, get me out of this bad trip, homie, you can just drink loads of orange juice. Wow. How would we film that? Well, we need someone else.

42:08And that someone else wouldn't be allowed to do anything because we'd need them to babysit us, basically. You'd have to stay sober like a fucking geek, bruh. Fine by me, bruh. We'd be blazing it up for 20, man. That would be interesting to watch, like watching someone like super hard. I have a sneaking suspicion I'd prang out. Yeah, I'm scared. I don't know if I'd like it. Why the fuck is that guy filming me? He's been following me for hours.

42:35so apparently when because genuinely like we're not we're not we don't partake in the weeds i know a lot of people that do um and apparently you it makes you think deeply about the world and its surroundings yeah like i said the last time i saw it was 2017 in california uh genuinely uh i tripped out i smoked one joint and was pacing back and forth in the airbnb kitchen for about an hour my cousin was watching Premier League years and I thought he was slagging me off to Alan Shearer I was like really? Why is he fucking telling him all that? And then I went to bed and I slept for 14 hours so I didn't like it I don't like it, it's not my back Maybe we shouldn't do that video then because that doesn't sound enjoyable No but it might be funny for the content And we're allowed to do it if we're in a country that it's legal Yeah We're not just going to be breaking the laws over here No, but like I'm saying, Spotify won't mind us going to do that.

43:31No, we're not smoking it here. We'll do it in lands that allow it. That's behind a paywall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Now, I've come up with some questions. I've got some from online. Shall we discuss them? Yep. 420 Blazers. Let's move that. Let's entrance into the episode. If humans laid eggs, would we eat them? I assume not fertilised. like we're talking like the same way chickens do we don't eat fertilized chicken eggs mate that's what i'm saying so i'm assuming the human eggs that we'd eat would be unfertilized yeah and we're saying they're not it's not like a human lays an egg every 99 months we're saying like if they just laid eggs like chickens would we eat that a woman would lay an egg once a month wouldn't she yeah i think he's right well i think he's but i'm associating it with babies yeah but rather Laying an egg is different to having a baby, though.

44:25It's, yeah. I know, but we're doing human, but yeah, okay. So we're going through the cycle here. Yeah. So would we eat? I don't think so. Well. Although I said I wouldn't eat anything. You'd try it, wouldn't you? I'd have mine scrambled. You'd try it once, wouldn't you? No, I wouldn't. Well, yeah, it's like you wouldn't try breast milk, would you? No, apparently it's really sour. Oh, see, that's a good argument, though, because I was going to say it's cannibalism. Ah. But... Would you try to breast milk? Not anyone's. Like, not anyone's. Just your mum. My permission. See if she's breastfeeding mother and getting in prayer.

45:05She's kind of stood in line. She moved the baby up. Whose would you drink? My girlfriend's. Give it a go. Give it a pop. I probably would. You know, if I have a baby, I'll have a pop. What about placenta? Oh, yes. You want a bit of that, do you? You seem excited. This is an interesting one. Now, apparently there's loads of good shit in there, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. Some people freeze it and have it on the year when the baby's won. But the thing is with that... That was wedding cake, isn't it?

45:41Well, maybe they'll start making that a thing. Robbie's had it. Yeah, but you get so few opportunities to try it. Yeah. So few. You can't ask some random woman for their placenta. No. You just can't. The problem with that is, is that a good enough excuse because you get so few opportunities to try it? And also, here's the other issue with that. I can go from my life never trying it and I'll never know if it's nice or not. There's two things that I could get out of it. I could try it and go, that was gross. Or I could try it, really like it, and I could never have it again. Yeah, well, you could have it again.

46:11Could. Unlikely to ever have it, like to have it as much as I'd like. What I want to know is when you have the placenta's there, right, for the record, I don't know what that's looking like. I don't know whether that's looking like a ball, whether that's looking like sausage meat or gunk. I don't know what that's looking like. But how many portions can you get? Like, it don't say like serves 12. Do you know what I mean? Like how, how many, one placenta, is that one dish? Is that million? Can a million people suck along that? Well, there's not a million, is it? Look how big the body is. Well, it's not a million, but it could be a grand, a thousand.

46:42How big is it, Steve? I don't know. Should I find the average measurement of a placenta? If you have triplets, will it be a bigger placenta? Oh, you'd hope so, wouldn't you? You'd like to think. Yeah, three times. What's the point? We've only got a third of a placenta each year, mum. How big is the average human placenta? I'll go 7 cent. Give me the answer, Google. Yeah. At full term, it weighs just over one pound. Five to 600 grams. Five to 600 grams. Approximately nine inches in diameter and one inch thick at its centre. thinning out at the edges. So how big? Nine inches. Yeah. You think that's nine inches?

47:21Fucking hope so.

47:26It would be the other way around, Jack. Oh, it's just a gag, mate. It would have made more sense if you said that and then said I fucking hope so. Nine inches. Yeah. One inch thick. There we go. One inch thick. Oh, nine. Nine by one. Yeah. And then thins out at the edges. Nine by one. Like a UFO. Right. What colour is it? It'd be like red and purple, wouldn't it? Blue, maybe? Maybe a shade of blue? God, this is horrible. Why are we... Shall I just find a picture? Yeah, let's have a look. This'll be easy. Not great for the pod. Not nice. There is shades of... Oh, that's a loading bar. What is that?

48:02This looks alright. Let's have a look at me. Let's have a look at that. It's just... Oh, shit. Yeah, it's just a lot of blood as well. Oh, wait. That looks like a rotisserie chicken. But the blood would... Up close, looks like a... Placenta. Yeah. With a sausage coming out of the top. Yeah. No, I would try it, but I think you fry it. You don't just eat it raw. No, no, no. Yeah, you'd probably put it in the toast. But yeah, Rob, we've spoken about it before because Robbie's... Placenta and beans. Robbie's tried it. I don't think I'd ever try it. I just don't care enough. What about if Ariane really wanted you to?

48:36Why would she? Why would you eat my placenta? If she did, this is hypothetical. We're not eating human eggs either. It's all of game. Mate, I couldn't eat the shrimp in Latvia. Oh shit, you couldn't. That's what I'm saying. I didn't like venison that much. I don't want to try crocodile or kangaroo or anything. It's a waste if you don't try it though. Would you have a pop? I'd have a little nibble on it. Would you? Yeah, as long as it's cooked and seasoned, we'd put some pork seasoning. Just looks like it'd be porky. Okay. Do you think that looks more porky than white meat? This is gross. Yeah, it looked pork.

49:08I think it's white meat. Do they say humans taste a bit like pig? A bit like chicken, I think. Chicken? Chicken. No, it is pig. It is pig. It is pig. We are pork. We are pork, aren't we? Humans pork. Are we? I think we are. I don't know what we are. I'd say we're more like pork. If you tattoo a pig... They do always use... They do, yeah. Apparently that's most like... Yeah. ...resembles... And Mythbusters always used pigs as their example on, like, acid on... There you go. So there you go. There we go. That's the answer to the question. What was the question? We would eat the placenta? No, it was eggs.

49:37Oh, yeah. Would you eat... Maybe we are high, you know. 420 plays it. I don't want to do that again. So would we eat the eggs? I think no. I think we would. I think you'd try it. I think we would. But it's different because are you talking like you get them in Tesco? Yeah. Do you know that sort of thing? It'd be in Tesco by the mangoes, I imagine. I think if you know them, like your partner, I think you would. I think you'd have a go. I think I'd be less inclined to eat my partner's eggs. You'd have a stranger's egg. Yeah, because if you can be as strange as eggs, that's removed. Do you know what I mean?

50:08like if you said right eat this fish i'm going all right i'll eat a bit of cod if you go look that's your fish that you grew up with that's nemo i'd go oh dad yeah i see a logic i don't think it's great logic i do see the logic would there would there be like a woman farm of just words of women popping out the eggs yeah that's a whole nother question now we're getting to the ethics of it yeah no we don't need to worry about that no i want to know if you go get him in like a six pack. No, this is like a dream world. So... I'm going to say we wouldn't eat the eggs. I'm going to say the grossest thing ever said on this podcast.

50:43Fucking hell. Do they look like eggs or do they look like periods inside a shell? I think they look like eggs. What do you mean? What does a period inside a shell look like? What do you mean? You're just saying there's blood inside a shell. I don't know what... Oh, yeah. I think it'll look like an egg. I think it'll look like an egg. The same as like... But I guess all the other eggs... More spherical, though. What do eggs look like from... What other animals lay eggs that aren't... Lizzie's? Birds. So what does a lizard egg... Do reptile eggs crack open and fry? They'll be green then ones, I imagine.

51:16What, a little yolk? Let me have a lizard egg. Platypus? Platypus? Lizard egg. Because I'm thinking all the other eggs that people will eat, like ostrich egg and stuff, they're like eggs from other bird creatures, poultry and stuff. So will... What's that? if people eat those mini eggs that's not that funny you've just shown him a picture of small lizard eggs and mini eggs and cracked up no i've googled mini eggs oh have you yeah oh i thought you're just showing him lizard eggs no they are lizard eggs for fuck's sake yeah they are oh they are yeah lizard eggs yeah so like if if a reptile eggs were cooked in the same way we do it to chicken eggs yeah would they look the same because if they do two completely separate animals look we can't stay speaking this long about the eggs i've got hundreds of these okay i wouldn't eat them uh you try it i'd try it but i wouldn't eat them regularly i'd give it a go i'd try it i'd like it sort of over easy i think so i like my eggs cool yep you've got to say 420 blazer no like you're high 420 blazer okay and you get progressively more high every time i can't that is the most high I've ever been.

52:25Nat. You're cool. LA 2017. If time travel is invented, it already exists. Yeah. Do you agree with this one? Well, I think you have no choice, do you? Because we'd know about it. Because even if it's invented in... What? No, because if someone came up to you right now and went, I'm from 2048, you'd lock them up, wouldn't you? Yeah, potentially. But even if... Say it takes another 3 ,000 years to invent time travel, would they... Surely we'd know if someone has genuinely gone back to a certain time. But I guess if they're really secretive about it... Well, there's all that Charlie Chaplin stuff, isn't there?

53:04What's that? On YouTube. There's like a Charlie Chaplin video and there's a geyser behind it wearing like a suit. Smartphone. Fuck. All right. Fucking facts, mate. It's not a fact, is it? I'm gooey with this. It's not a fact. This is not a fact. Charlie Chaplin, iPhone. Chaplin. You know how Chaplin is, don't you? Yes. Yeah, of course we do. Godfather of comedy, mate. Charlie Chaplin, time travel. Time traveller. I'm watching it here. Charlie, I'll describe it to you. Charlie, Chaplin's time traveller, analysed. Might be a bit long, so you might. So, 1924. No. Hang on. Oh, that was a quick reaction.

53:44No, no, no, no, no. He's like holding his face like this, but one, it doesn't look like a smartphone. It looks like, he's on the blower to be fair to him. That's what I mean. Do you want to see it? It just looks like he just walks past and he's like, but he could just be itching his ear. Yeah, he could be itching his ear. Anything could be happening. Look, grainy, grainy footage. There's nothing to confirm that. And every time we see someone who tweets or tries to do these things about how they're from the future, they're all bullshit every time, aren't they? But that's before AI. Because AI now, you can't trust anything.

54:16Oh, no, AI is fucked in it. Yeah, but we're saying he's just itching his ear. You don't need AI to get someone to itch your ear. You don't need to itch your ear the whole time walking, are you? Depends how itch your ear is. It's like the munchkin that killed themselves. What? You know that? What? You seen that? You know Wizard of Oz? Yeah. Apparently they were worked so hard on the set. One of the munchkins. I don't... What are you on about? What's this got to do with anything? Yeah. Actually, where's this going? No, I'm talking about grainy footage from back in the day. Can't prove nothing. What?

54:46How is this your job? I don't understand that made no sense you still couldn't get your words out are you high Wizard of Oz yeah the film there's munchkins in that aren't there I don't know a little bit like kind of like the Oompa Loompas in Willy Wonka okay there is a theory that one of the munchkins was so overworked on the set of Wizard of Oz they killed themselves right okay and in one of the scenes of Wizard of Oz you can see like Dorothy skipping down the road and you can see a munchkin hanging from a tree no I've heard about that oh yeah I know what you're talking about I don't know what's that got to do with Charlie Chaplin's phone.

55:19I'm just saying grainy footage. It was probably a munchkin hanging on a, like literally hanging off a tree. Like to climb the tree. But grainy footage back then was so bad. That guy's itching his ear and someone's gone, oh, it must be a time travel. Yeah, I think that's bullshit. I don't know where I was going with that. Okay, I actually do disagree with this stone of thought. Because they're saying if time travel exists, we'd know about it. I think if they invented it, if they invented it in like 2000 years, what benefit will they get of coming back to this year for one yeah that's a good point so yeah yeah why would they come back to 2026 yeah something something crucial might be about to happen in this year like imagine if they did it just before covid yeah yeah but i mean but i think there'll be rules there'll be rules if time travel is invented you can't go back and change yeah but there's always the backhanders in no i know but it will have to be someone because if they came back and stopped covid that could have caused something else worse so the butterfly effect but fuck it.

56:15Yeah, but then with that, what's the point in time? If you're not allowed to go back and do anything, what is the point in going back? To what? To experience it. For science, for research. Somebody asked Brian Cox, you know, the scientist guy. Not the actor. They asked him if you could go, if you could travel faster than the speed of light, could you see the dinosaurs? Yeah. And do you know what he said? Yeah. He said, if you could, then you could, but you can't. so irrelevant so let's not answer any of these questions do you know what i mean by that not a clue i don't know what you're on about what do you think about this time travel one do you think time travel has been invented uh do i think time travel i i don't i don't i'm gonna put that to bed straight away what do you reckon i don't because i think that people would use it for good i think humans are inherently good you obviously get some evil cunts yeah but i think they would have come back and they'd have gone whoa, don't eat that bat.

57:18But I don't think you can use it for good because changing one thing you don't know what else it could cause. Because even if you were to learn some information then you'd then tell the information to someone and then it affects everything, doesn't it? Yeah, it's the butterfly effect, isn't it? So what is the point of the interview? Also if it has been invented that implies that right now what happens in 2000 years time is also playing out right now. to them. Which then makes it... I feel stone now. So we're saying... Right, so this one is some debate I saw online recently. I think you might be best at analysing this one, Stevie.

57:57Okay. You know maths a lot better than I imagine. Yeah, I don't know. You don't know. Let's let him do it. Give us a sum. See who goes first. 33 times 11. 363. That's close though. You're good. It's close. That's patronizing because you won. Come on. 24 times 8.

58:23392. Yeah, it is. Is it? Yeah. Because it's 10 times 240 minus 48. That's exactly how I, yeah. Okay. I could do this all day. Sorry. I'm doing one more. I'm doing one more. Okay. Then we'll do whatever. I'm so intrigued. I guarantee after he does all this, this really has nothing to do with maths. 26 times 50. That's such a weird one. 13 ,000? Or 1 ,300? What was it? 26? 1 ,300. Times 50. I've got to accept your first answer. Okay, say 1 ,300. It's 260 times 5, which is 1 ,300. Correct! No, right, so I need to know the maths, right? So, Mo Farah versus Luke Littler. Okay. I love this. Yeah. so we don't know if Mo Farah can play darts but for the sake of the argument let's assume he can't he's never he's an average he's never friended up so he's not average no he's same as Jack Smith why are you getting so many strays what the fuck's going on I have to time out of my day alright I have to get two trains this morning change at Ely I'm just getting shit lovely cathedral great cathedral yeah Yeah.

59:38Yeah. Mo Farah versus Luke Littler take each other on on a half marathon. Who wins? Mo Farah. Correct. However, what about if after every kilometre they have to check out a game of 5.01? Okay. Factor that in. Who wins the darts run marathon? And how are you working it out? What's this got to a stone of thoughts? No, I just thought I saw that online. I thought that's someone who's stoned sort of that. Okay. So half marathon. Every kilometre or mile, did you say? Comma. Every kilometre. So it's 21 kilometres. Yeah. So he's got to do it 20 times. He's got to check out 501 21 times. Okay. And he is an average dance player or just never thrown, you said?

1:00:25He's never really thrown. Let's say it takes him five minutes per 501, which is a lot of time. I think... No one else throwing. He's the only one going every single time. He'd just throw three as quick as he could at the board every time and just chip it away until he's on double one. Yeah, but you've got to bear in mind Littler's also doing it and it'll take him at least a minute each time. And he's shattered. Mo Farah's not so shattered. Littler doesn't even want to walk back and forward to the board at this point. He's not a runner, is he? He can't even walk to the board. When in the middle of a half marathon, He's not going to want to be going back and forward Is he Wait when do you mean he doesn't want to walk Do you mean just like now No but in the middle of the run I'm sitting at the Premier League I'm talking about mid run Someone's grabbing it for me I'm talking about mid run For fuck's sake Start to attach a string to the darts No I'm saying like mid run He's not going to want to be doing it I think even if we made...

1:01:33Sierra has all the best active and outdoor brands you need. From athletic stuff, like a full-court pickup game, swish, to athletic-ish stuff, like a half-mile stroll. Get those steps in! And for morning hikes up the mountain trail, good pace to nighttime ghost stories from the camping chair. What a twist. Whatever level of active, Sierra loves it all. Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. Propel Fitness Water. With Gatorade electrolytes, zero sugar, and vitamins, Propel hydrates better than water to help you get the most out of your workout and get back to your best self.

1:02:15What propels you? Propel with Gatorade electrolytes. Fall has never looked or tasted this good. Sweet Green's Fall Harvest Menu is back with seasonal favorites dressed to impress and made to be devoured. Warm roasted sweet potatoes, crisp apples, maple glazed Brussels and crave worthy flavours in the autumn harvest bowl, maple glazed salmon plate and roasted bacon Brussels side. The season's most desirable menu has returned to Sweetgreen featuring fall's best rest. Make your move. Order on the Sweetgreen app. If Mo Farah took five minutes every single time, I think it took longer. I think you would.

1:02:55I think you'd have been at 12 minutes. Yes. Yes. That's exactly what I said We wouldn't take anywhere near that We've thrown a dart We've got a bit about us Okay so what 12 minutes 20 times 240 minutes Yeah 2 hours What? 4 hours So he's adding 4 hours onto what's his half marathon That's got to be an hour 45 minutes So less than an hour About an hour 5k in 13 minutes So we're saying five hours. I think Littler would run a half in about three to three and a half hours. Oh, yeah. Three to three and a half hours. See, I think Littler would win. And he's taken... I think Littler would win. Potentially, yeah.

1:03:41I reckon he could check out 21 games of 5.01 in half an hour. Easy. Because even if he just walked it... Maybe not easy. He would just walk it. Yeah, yeah. 5.01 it. Everyone seems to think this is Farrah's all day long. I'm back in Luke. Let's say he walks it. That would be, what, 12 kilometres an hour probably walking it. No, what the fuck? A kilometre every 12 minutes it could take. Yeah, you know what? I think it'd be tight. I think it'd be closer than you think. That's a brilliant question. And it's not out of the realms of possibility to be seen. I'd pay to watch that. Yeah. I'd pay to watch that.

1:04:18Yeah. I think it'd genuinely be quite tight. Can I get you scores on the doors then? What are you going for? I think Luke I think Luke most people think Farrah you know we asked this on my double tops pod and the general consensus was Farrah are you doing it under the assumption Luke could complete the half marathon well he'd walk it if he wanted to wouldn't he still a feat yeah I'd probably say Luke but on the assumption Mo Farrah doesn't have any natural ability of throwing because I don't think it should take 12 minutes to finish a 501 leg when you're the only one throwing Fair enough. When people have...

1:04:57People you... What? I wrote these. People you... Come on. People you haven't seen in years still think of you as the person you were back then. That's deep. That is deep, isn't it? So, like, how mad is this, by the way? Blind Tobes, who we had on the pod a few years ago, obviously blind. He'd be a mad name if he weren't. Not blind anymore. He very much is. He says that when he pitches himself, he pitches himself as 15 years old. Yeah. That is weird. Sad, isn't it? Yeah, it is. Yeah. There's people, yeah, there'll be people I went to uni with that still think of me as the uni version of me. Or kids as well.

1:05:41Like friends when you were a kid who you went to school with and stuff will only ever have known you. Obviously, it's different when they can see you online and stuff. No, but it is true, isn't it? If you think of someone from college, like just random you didn't have much interaction with you'll think of them as the 17 year old yeah you can't picture them as an adult but they are like a foot they've got and every now and then they might pop up on Facebook or something you're like oh they've got a wife and kids now or whatever do crabs think fish can fly? great transition that's an amazing question that is good there are crabs walking on the bottom of water just looking up look at these cunts but then it's the majority of doing that so wouldn't the fish look down and think they can walk.

1:06:26Oh my God, that's great. Fish will look at crabs and go, they've got legs. Most people, yeah, just put them popping up. And do crabs eat fish? Like, are they grabbing them? What do crabs eat? No, I think they might. Algae and shit. I've never seen a crab come like that. Why are you underwater with a crab come? I've never seen that. That would be pictured in cartoons. Yeah, in Finding Nemo, there's a scene when Nemo goes down the sink and he's coming out the tube and as he comes out of the pipe, he flies up and there's, are there not two crabs waiting to grab things that are flying out of it? No, he's right.

1:07:04Yeah, he's right. He's right. Is that not crabs? Do crabs grab fish that are swimming above them with their pincers? No, that's not typical crab behaviour. Most crabs are scavengers or opportunistic predators that forage for food on the sea floor. They typically feed on algae, detritus, small invertebrates or dead animals. While some species can be active hunters, especially on smaller prey... Yep, yep, yep. How is Stevie's hairline at the moment? I'm not actually able to see anyone's current appearance unless you're showing me something on camera. I thought you were about to take a break.

1:07:42Oh, God. I like Jack's thought there as well, though. Do crabs... No, do fish think crabs are mad for walking? Yeah, I think it's a complete polar opposite, isn't it? That's good. They're like, shit. If a crab gets pissed up, will it walk forwards? That's a shower. That's a stone of thought. There you go. 420 blaze it. There you go. If heat rises, why is there snow at the top of a mountain? Work that one out. I went on holiday once. It was proper hot, boiling. Went up a mountain, snow up there. I thought, the heat down there is probably getting up it. When I was in Tenerife, You could see the snow on top of the peaks.

1:08:23That's where I was. Yeah. That's where I was. I went up that mountain in Tenna. Well, heat only hits a certain point, doesn't it? Because we're so warm down here because the sun is hitting the earth. It's not just like the rays of the sun. The sun's also warming up the earth. Hang on, Antarctica would be boiling. No. It's miles away from the equator. Yeah, because the sun... So heat rises, but it's also hottest in the middle. So you have a hot ball in the middle, in the crust, in the core, and then you have the earth, and then it gets hot again. We are so not equipped to talk about this. Yeah, I was thinking the issue with shower forts can be like, talk about the fish and the crabs.

1:09:04Funny. That's where we're good at. This stuff involves, we need to get a scientist on here one day. Yeah, Brian Cox. We need more. Email Brian Cox. Yeah. I'm right here, and you're just already planning your next guest. I'm fucking here. Yeah, I changed it. Ely. Well, you should email Brian Cox, though. Imagine that episode. I will, I will. If you buy a bigger bed, you get more bedroom, but less bedroom.

1:09:33You look so confused. Yeah, but the thing is, it's just shit, isn't it? It's just shit, because, yeah, all right. That caused me real issues in my current house, because I bought a Super King. Did you measure first? Super king for a super king. Thank you. I bought it before moving from my old house to my current house and I left it in the box and then when we moved into the new house, put it in. The only way to make it fit in the room was take door off hinges. Why are we talking about that now? Because we're talking about more room in the bed. Yeah, that was a shit one. I was just doing it for bounce.

1:10:08I had no bedroom, but fuck me, did I have room in bed. You had plenty of bedroom, but no bedroom. Yeah, loads. Too big. I've gone back down to double now This one is pretty good This is more of just like a chatty one I was really fat at the time though as well So that was quite helpful to have More room if you're chubby How weird is Jack's t-shirt today? I was going to say about that What? He's very short Like cropped Stand up for the camera You're winding me up What? Stand up? Stand up for the camera You've done a little planning thing have you? What, over an hour into the episode? Yeah, yeah.

1:10:47No, I trust you would do that because you'd think that'd be a way to pull the wool over my eyes. You look so angry. Why are you so angry? What's wrong with my t-shirt? Stand up and everyone can judge. You stuck sat on my back. Have I got cum on my back? Yeah, but I've got nothing to do with this.

1:11:05Now, don't pull it down as natural. That's quite short, isn't it? And you're quite tall. It is short. It is short. What the fuck is going on here? I was just thinking it when I was looking at you then. I was like, that doesn't look right. That doesn't fit. Okay. Is it yours? No. What have I done then? Wrong. Bought a t-shirt that doesn't fit you. All right. Maybe do that off the pod. Hey, don't look at me. No, but you're fucking buying into his bollocks, mate. It's not bollocks, is it? It's not bollocks. One more of them. You're out. You're on a yellow. I got a pep out there. Okay, that's all right.

1:11:47Your jumper fits you That's fine Primark, five pounds We've got the yellow and the red card on the wall there mate There you go Don't know what that was about listeners But there's surely some kind of scheme to make me have a complex You don't have a bum do you? What the fuck? Is this like that thing when you said the other day When you were eating vagina? No you were telling me earlier That you used to get bullied for it Wait what? No I want to hear more about that What are you on about? We did a thing off the pod where I said when we came back in, we'd try and wind up Alfie. Before this pod, Fiona told us to bully you about your T-shirt.

1:12:24I didn't want to do it. Let's do less of these because it's making the... I mean less of these. My first time being... I'm doing it every week. Fiona told us to and I got scared of her. That's because somebody in Pret said to me this morning, came up to me and said, out of nowhere, said that my T-shirt was too small for me. and I don't know who they were or why they said it and then it gave me a complex. Yeah, I thought bringing it up again would make you feel better. No, thanks mate, it really did. You're welcome. It really did. You're welcome. Can we actually, you were telling me that you've got no...

1:12:53I don't bring up bad things that's happened to you in your past, do I? No, I'm actually really sorry about that. Yeah, good. Yeah. Can you actually tell us about your bum? What? He was telling me, I don't know if you were there, but he was telling me that he used to get bullied at school for not having a bum. I did. What, you did have a bum? I did get bullied. Well, I would say bullied. Playful. Playful. I don't really... Basically, right? Here you go. So I'm a bit bigger than the average man, right? BMI is a little bit high, right? So I struggle in some trousers, right? The reason would be my trousers fall down an awful lot.

1:13:27And you'd think, well, that doesn't make sense. You're saying it the other way around. Yeah, that doesn't make sense. I tell you why, because where do your trousers lie? Above my bum. Above my bum, yeah. No, other side, like belly button. No? Oh, no, below belly. Below belly, yeah. Below belly. Just above the... Well, basically, what happens is I'll get my trousers on, right? So I've got no bum. My friend used to call me two-back Jack, right? No bum. So it's just back and then more back. Oh, two-back Jack. Iron and board, anything, right? Genuinely, it's bad. My girlfriend laughs at it constantly.

1:14:00Well, she laughs at your bum. Yeah, it's one of them, isn't it? Anyway, so whenever I buy trousers, because my belly's big, right? Because I'm a chubby man. But I have no back. If I pull them up, you can't put them... The belly pushes it down, but then the back, they just fall. So most people put it up there because they don't have a massive belly. You've got a backwards body then. Yeah, I've got a backwards body. You've got an arse on the front. I'm like an upside down speed bump. I like it. What size are you? So 34 waist, 32 leg. Oh, okay. You? I'm 33, 33, and you can very rarely get them. you're 30 you're an inch but you're like six foot four no i'm 33 34 sorry i always get them not talk not long enough the only voices to me trousers aren't big enough i say yeah you sound like the fucking brick in brett i'm 33 30 little little legs in stone or kick we weigh the same right do you want some more of these bad boys yeah what was the last one go to the next one it was Bedroom Bedroom wasn't it some shit didn't like that one nah shit you're better than that I know oh yeah this one is a chatty one that we can have a chat about and I actually thought of this one myself I'm not saying it might not already be out there on TikTok but I remember thinking of this in assembly when I did a fart once right so it's just unnecessary information isn't it asking a bullet to make you believe you more you know in The Sims when you play as a character and what do you have above your head a little diamond little green diamond yeah I thought imagine if like your farts like when you fart a diamond appears on top of your head so when you walk down the street you just know everyone that's farted what be horrible be horrible how is this one we're gonna have a discussion about be horrible wouldn't it I've got a chatty one for you yeah I've got a chatty one yeah it would be that's that's the same as like if you said what if but farts had a colour and you could just see but what's the shower for?

1:16:10what do you want from us? what do you want from us? no no no but what would be the worst stat if you could see if you could click on people and see stats above their head life stats what would be the worst stat to come up? oh

1:16:31not you just you know fucking that's a hard one to answer isn't it Do you have, you just saying total farts? No, I don't think we're talking about farts now. No, no, so it could be anything. So it could be farts this day. Imagine that. So farts today. So I could click on you, 26. Fucking hell, he's a fart, isn't he? Get away from him. Or it could be like lovers, ex-lovers, what they call it. What do kids call it? Not kids, but what are street kids? What's your numbers, bro? What's your numbers? Body count. Body count, body count, body count. I'd quite like to see how many times someone's washed their hands that day.

1:17:04Why? Because I swear every time I go to the toilet, men just don't wash their hands, ever. And I've got to think the amount of times. I'm not a serial hand washer. Why? Just wash them. I've got a theory here. What? This is a shower thought. Go on. My penis is clean. I like this. Yeah. Okay, look. I get your point. Sometimes you can go and have a wee and you might not feel in that moment I've not really touched anything. However... Sometimes I have a handless wee. Yeah? fine as well and then you're thinking I definitely don't need to wash my hands but how often are you in a bathroom throughout the day so realistically even if in that exact moment you don't need to wash your hands because of the wee you've just had it has been three hours since you've touched a million different things since then it's just worth washing your hands whilst you're in there it's the only opportunity you get really what's the problem with it what's the problem with having germy hands it's dirty and germy but what's the problem what's going to happen I do think you need a few germs in you when you're a kid yeah Oh, yeah.

1:18:06You get used to it, but then once you're an adult, you don't need it. I think if you're just constantly exposed to filth, you kind of... It's like these people you see on these extreme, horrible TV shows. They've often got mental conditions, but they're living in their own filth for years. How are they not dead? They're not showered in years. What, the hoarders? Yeah, like the big... Yeah, I know the... What? The what? What's that? What's that, then? Well, I actually don't know what that's meant to be. They lay in bed and they're just like in their field, like sea lion people. Do you know what I mean?

1:18:39And they're like covered in cigarettes butts and stuff like that. And they just drink. And like these people that have obviously clearly got a lot going on. They're on the verge. Nothing going on, but a lot going on up there. They're on the verge of death though, aren't they? But they're not. They're pushing towards. They live. They live. If I did that, if I live like that for a month, I reckon I'd be on the ropes. Like piss and shit and stuff like that. These people are so exposed to bacteria that I think they sort of become bacteria. It's the immune system, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because they say as a kid that you shouldn't be...

1:19:10I think they... I remember reading something years ago where they were saying like this 99.9 % bacterial spray is really bad for kids because you're getting rid of every opportunity for them to get sick. Yeah, they've got to get it. It's like chickenpox. Yeah, you have to force it. You've got to have chickenpox. You've got to get it, yeah. And vaccines as well, they give you a little bit of the virus so your body learns how to fight it. So I think every day, have a little bit of piss in your mouth. Mouth? more hands mouth okay there we go yeah we should all have a little bit of piss in our mouths yeah so what stats were to come up well I thought that and now I'll tell you the one let's be honest go on time since last masturbated imagine that imagine going to see your mate and it says 45 minutes and he's been around your house for two hours

1:20:06that's very good yeah wouldn't that be horrible that would be horrible that would be the worst one you'd get a complex you just never do it would you right here's one what's weirder if you if you met your mate and it said you just met him then and there and it said time since last masturbation one hour or if it said 20 years does it what one are you most likely to question 20 years Yeah, right. Have a go, mate. Because then off that logic, that would have been like, say for you guys, you're 33. Yeah. They'd have done it at 14 or 14. Not for me. But there are people like that. You know what you like young?

1:20:48Yeah. You said some questionable things on this episode. I know, I know. Yeah. How many more do you want? Loads. Loads? I like it. You like it? I'm enjoying myself. Yeah. uh why are kids bullied for being different while adults are praised for being different i just think this one is an easy answer and it's a bit of a serious answer but i think it's because adults we learn from our mistakes so when we're younger we try and fit in and the way to fit in is not by fitting into like-minded people but excluding those that don't fit like you see like you do you know i mean whereas so like at school you might go oh why is that girl shaved her hair off it's a bit odd because all the other girls have long hair but when you're older you actually embrace that she had the courage to be different like that do you know what i mean yeah i think that is the thing i think with kids i think there's also a lot of aspects of envy i do generally think some kids can be quite envious of other people's like different like being being slightly different being more out there having other passions and interests when you have like most people that just go with the grain and everything like that and they might look at someone and they mind say like you're 14 15 you still like you know pokemon but you're trying to be one of the cool guys you don't want to talk about it you might sort of give a bit of bully take the piss out of someone that's still like some other form of anime because they want to they want to sort of say that they do it but they don't want to break their image yeah i think there's a lot of that aspect to it that's a good answer i think yeah we hit a point where we just don't care about being cool anymore as well as you get older though i think it goes like this i think young children are inherently kind yeah because they they don't they genuinely that it's a cliche but they don't see color do they no they're like there's wasn't there like there's a cartoon or something that really explains what i'm trying to say here i can't quite it's like an anti-racism advert or something but kids really don't see color do they unless they're brought up in a fucking wrong household and then even then if they see something they'll ask it will be innocent any questions they ask yeah yeah and then when you go i'm not talking about racism now i'm talking about more sort of like trivial things like haircuts and shit like that but when you get to high school you have that desire to be you're like a pack animal so like i said you will start to some people will exclude people to try and make themselves yeah but then when you become an adult i think you just like i'm a lot more of a kind of person now than i was when i was at high school yeah i know who i am now i've got nothing to prove um so i think that's probably just the reason why i don't think being different should always be celebrated though should it well it depends what your difference is if if your difference is that you enjoy murdering people then no but like so i remember when i was at high school like every everyone at that age really outwardly is straight yeah you don't even if there are gay there's probably lots of gay people at high school but not often do kids have the courage to come out there was one girl in i think year six or seven that was like openly gay.

1:23:45And I was like, that was encouraged. That was really cool. And you're saying it shouldn't be. No, no, I'm thinking fair enough. Fucking hell, that's brave. Because the school's like a battlefield, right? Everyone's ready to take the piss out of whatever. I look back on that girl now and think about it. And I think that was fucking cool. However, there was a girl who barked and I still think nutter. Yeah, that's weird. Do you know what I mean? Speed barks. Yeah, I think that's weird. He's loved all around the world. Don't get it. I don't get it. I don't get the barking. Should we sit here now and go, fair enough, she was brave enough to bark?

1:24:16No. No, I think there are limits. There's limits. But it's not harming anyone. Yeah, but you don't have to celebrate it either. You can't leave. No, I agree with that. I think you can do both. What, harming? I don't know. It's not nice, though. Did it harm you, though? How old are you when she was barked? When she started pissing up my leg. Yeah, it's fair enough. That's one step too fucking far. No, she was a... Oh God, I can picture her. But she used to sit... How old are you when you're picturing her? Good girl.

1:24:52You had a couple of good quotes here. You had a good five. Where is he on the list now? Good point. I'll tell you. I'm going to put you somewhere. I'm going to put you somewhere. And at the end of the episode, I'll reveal where you are. All right? All right. I like it. Above Robbie. Yeah. Cool. Got you there now. Got you there. Where were we, guys? You were talking about a girl who's a dog. Yeah. Should we actually be thinking like, oh, fair enough to her? Like... No, I don't think it should be... You could just... I think, look, some people are different. Let them be that. Yeah. I always think that.

1:25:33I just don't... Sometimes I'll look at things and I don't get it personally, but also like, if it doesn't affect me, I don't care. But now, and I'm not trying to say this to look good, I genuinely am like this. If I see somebody who is an expert in something niche, right? Or somebody who has such a deep passion for something that is so far removed from what I would like, I love it. I think you are so fucking cool. Like if you see someone online and like, as a kid, I'd take the piss out of people who went to paint Warhammer at the weekend. My mate Mark, I used to call him a nerd. If I walk past one of these games cafes now and see them all in there, All these people in there, and they're all painting Warhammer.

1:26:07I think, fair fucking play to you. You know what you're like, and you're going after it. You did say any adults that go to Disneyland are nonsense. Yeah, apart from that, they're paedophiles. Okay, there's a limit there again. You don't like adult Disney? Right, so how can I explain this? How can I explain this? Because there's a big cult following of that. There's loads of them, isn't there? I think if... I don't know. I think, yeah, that's a good point. That is a good point. I think if i just the only reason what so okay let's be let's be honest get my cards out on the table i'd oh like away from the podcast persona this is what i genuinely think i think if you love disney that's absolutely fine right if you love the films if you love the merch if you love going that's absolutely fine but my point what i'm actually trying to make is i think there is a high percentage of people that have that interest right that could be pedophiles right and that is not me judging people who like disney i'm just saying i reckon on the venn diagram it's very heavy in the middle because disney is heavily aimed at children we don't know about michael jackson we don't know whether he was a pedophile or not it's been discussed and he's been accused of it for years he had this neverland shit right he had this obsession with the childlike things i think there's more like and i don't know it's just my opinion i don't know i think there's more likely to be pedophiles of people this is so bleak of uh people that love disney than there are uh pedophiles that love um beer very broad that one

1:27:44or could have said warhammer like you building yeah say warhammer nah

1:27:53you were just saying that when you see him in the window you've been going on I go in there with all that good life but you always bully me for liking things like Rocket League but you don't live by it if you wore Rocket League t-shirts and went to Rocket League this is not making me look Gregon he's a he's a he's a as a kid I want not a kid there's a I can't stop saying there's a bloke I watch on TikTok. I've spoken about him before. He does flight simulator. Yeah. I could not think of anything more personally for me, more boring. Yeah, I'm the same. But I watch him and I love how into it he is.

1:28:31And he's going, we need the extract of 8-1-2-1. Oh, come, we're coming in on the northeasterly winds like that. And I think, fuck me. That's cool. Because you are Francis Bourgeois, loves trains. Boring for me. But when I see him get passionate about it, I think, go on, Francis. Because he gets excitable. Yeah. He's an interest. There's a guy on TikTok that collects hind sauce packets. You seen him? Yes, I have seen him. He's got a binder. He's got them in a folder. He's got a proper binder, right? And he collects and he keeps buzzing. People send him rare ones from across the world. But he gets some mad rare ones as well.

1:29:02It's like Honeysuckle Sweet Texas Barbecue. It's like, I can't believe I finally got it. And he puts it in his binder. It's unbelievable. He travels and gets them from places. Yeah. Properly pays off. I think it's cool. I think people have a passion in something. Yeah, I think that the thing with things like that is if everyone suddenly decided they want these sources, it's completely normal. It's like football cards. Like if you were the only one who went, oh, I want this card of this player that's been signed by that player, you're then the weirdo. It's only because loads of people do it that it's normal.

1:29:32Go steady because obviously, what was it, the Kabuto King? Yeah. The Kabuto King. Yeah, but he's the odd one there because it's like, oh, you're doing this strange thing. Everyone now wants a Kabuto. Yeah. Yeah, so exactly. It then gets to a point, at first everyone's gone, that's weird that you're collecting all them. It suddenly got popular and everyone's going, oh, I want to do this. No, you're right. How has he got? I don't know, but he's got a shit load. Shit Pokemon as well. Well, you say that, not now. It's one of the most desired ones. It's right up there with Chazazard. So for anyone who doesn't know, there's a guy called Kabuto King on socials and he's bought all of the first edition Kabuto cards.

1:30:08It's a Pokemon card that not many people liked when it came out or cared about. It's like a fossil, isn't it? Yeah. it's not even the evolution no yeah he's bought thousands of these cards but that is that's what's it called manipulating the market though isn't it it is yeah you're buying all of one as a monopoly he's got that monopoly on that card it's clever it's but it's it's scarcity that's what he's done he's created scarcity but it depends it depends whether it's weird whether the reason he's done it is just because he really loved Kabuto or if he saw a gap and was like I'm going to do that could be a bit of a which then changes it completely I think it's more so the gap so that's a business thing I agree yeah It's a smart one.

1:30:44It is a smart one. And he's built social media off it. Yeah. Just haven't loaded Kabootosh. What was the question for this one? It was stats on the head, wasn't it? No. No. We've moved on from that. It was... God, I'm so stoned. It was... Oh, why are kids bullied for being different? Okay. I think we've answered most of that, yeah. I'll give you one more because I feel like this is a long episode. Okay. Okay. How can your body replicate the feeling of falling from high altitudes in a nightmare if you've never fallen like that before? That's for you. I ain't got a clue. He's honest. I'd... I'd...

1:31:21I guess it depends. I've done rides that replicate that feeling. Yeah, actually, this is a shit one. Maybe that's the reason. I've actually fallen over as well. You know when you're a kid and you're running and you trip and you fall and it gives you that belly. That's not the same though, is it? Well, no, the belly, he's right. Dolphin Bridge. Dolphin Bridge. How fucking cute is that, by the way? What, that you fell over? No, no. In Norwich, there's a bridge called Dolphin Bridge. Yeah. And you never think of it, do you, when you're growing up? That's cute. There'll be people who have never been to Norwich going, Dolphin Bridge.

1:31:52That's lovely. I didn't even know it. I've never heard of Dolphin Bridge. Have you? Have you? Yeah. Yeah. And it's like, it's probably a smack head bridge, isn't it? Yeah, where it is. Why are there always smack heads near bridges? Where is that? Near Waterworks Road? Yeah, yeah. That way. Because that gives you the flittery stomach when you fly over there. Yeah, when you're driving, there's like a big hill that suddenly goes back down. why do we get that the belly thing is that our organs going up growing up that was one of my favourite rides at Pleasured Hills loved the pirate ship because every time you went back down your belly proper goes did it ever make you cum no what I said as a kid at Pleasured Hills and that's what you've asked no but what's happened to you today I don't come at theme parks what the fuck's happened to you today I'm always like this aren't I yeah you clearly don't I went on a pirate ship you know them pirate ships me and Danny went on one in Saudi Arabia.

1:32:43We went to Winter Wonderland, Saudi Arabia. They have it throughout the year. It's weird. Oh, yeah, because they weren't traditionally followed Christmas, were they? Do they have winter? Yeah, it's not like a crit. No, it's a desert, isn't it? It's going to be boiling all the time. Well, they're called Winter Wonderland. Yes, it's called Winter Wonderland. Just Wonderland. Yeah. Are you sure it's not the Mr. Beast games thing? Nope. Nope, it's just pre all that. Anyway, went there. It was like August or whatever. We went there, and there was no one there, right? but me and I just went in I say no one it's probably like three people in like this whole we just went on all the rides but it was pretty much just us so we went on the pirate ship and we were having a laugh whatever the bumper car you know going up all that then we went on the pirate ship it just took a turn why?

1:33:26because it was just weird because we went opposite ends and we were just staring at each other for like five minutes that is weird just going like that and we were just like and then you're just like but you can't really like when you go up you can't really go like that's good you bring that up because when I go on roller coasters and I don't go often I don't make any noise and I think that's odd really? it's like having sex without making any noise you don't want to do that wait what? why do you keep associating roller coasters with like cumming? no it's got all that sort of body genetic like biology sort of thing in it like roller coasters you're going to let out your inhibitions It would be weird if you saw, like a group of 20 people all on the same roller coaster and all of them are just.

1:34:12Yeah, he's right. He is right. Well, so you don't make any noise. Look, look at that photo of me and Jack on hyperspace mountain. Yeah, but that's part. No, he fucking hates him. He hates rides. Is it Rita Queen of Speed? Yeah. Yeah. You reckon you do that just dead face? Yeah, I'd be like that. I don't know. I mean, I honestly could not care less. Yeah, but you can't. That one pulls all your skin back. quite as a mouse just eyes popping out he hates rides I love a theme park I love a theme park I think they're great 27 times 7 what? oh shit now you

1:34:58it's 189 270 54 we'll leave it there we'll let him work that out I don't know what is it 199 what was it I don't know I don't fucking know I'm just asking no 189 that's what I said first time I'm just asking there you go guys this has been Jack Mate's Happy Hour Podcast with me Jack Mate Jack Smith and Stevie White enjoy your 420 whatever you're doing whatever you do be safe blaze it blaze it up you didn't say blaze it after saying enjoy your 420 I know but that was implied you said you always have to say it I know what are we calling this stoner thoughts in brackets it's 420 blazer. Go get high.

1:35:40If you're in Amsterdam. If you're in England, don't touch the stuff. Illegal. Thanks, Jack. Cheers. Cheers, Jack. You say cheers. Cheers. Now I've granted that for mine. Yes, yes. Cheers. That was fun. That was a laugh, wasn't it? We had a giggle. We had a giggle. Yeah, you had a couple of good quotes.

1:36:05Jack makes happy hour. Hour and 40 minutes. You said a couple of good moments. Fall has never looked or tasted this good. Sweet Greens fall harvest menu is back with seasonal favorites dressed to impress and made to be devoured. Warm roasted sweet potatoes, crisp apples, maple glazed Brussels, and crave-worthy flavors in the autumn harvest bowl, maple glazed salmon plate, and roasted bacon Brussels side. The season's most desirable menu has returned to Sweetgreen, featuring fall's best dressed. Make your move. Order on the Sweetgreen app. On September 25th. Me, me, me. No one's coming for us. It's just you and me, boy.

1:36:4958 miles. Heart of the Beast is the must-see adventure of the year. An incredible story of survival. I got you. One of the most extraordinary on-screen bonds you'll ever see. Only the greatest dog to ever walk the earth. Brad Pitt. I'll get you home. Heart of the Beast. Pauline Theater, September 25th. Rated PG-13. May be inappropriate for children under 13.