657 - Car Meat, Jaack’s House Got Robbed, & HUGE Flash The Tortoise News! (All Caught Up)

32:15That's fucking Musk. That's Musk's fault. On this one occasion, it is not Musk's fault. And I was eating car meat at the time. Car meat. Yeah. Car meat is bigamist. Yeah. How much damage? Loads, loads. Is it bad? All scraped down the side. Are you going to get that bloke you always mention on Instagram to fix it for you? Tux? Yeah. No, he's a cleaner. He's not a fucking magician, mate. I thought he could buff scrapes. Oh, he had plenty of detailing. I could go to the body shop in Norwich and they'd do it. but last time I had to drive his spaceship for two weeks. Do you remember? That was weird.

32:45Did you ever see that? No. Oh, you would have loved it. Jack had to leave his car, the Tesla, there for like two weeks. And the guy was like, oh, have you got a car you can use? And he was like, nah, not really. So he said... You've missed this chapter in my life. Must have done, yeah. He was like, oh, you can use mine. So I had to drive us to London that week because Jack was refusing to go in this car. Yeah, because Robbie, like, I was driving about in this guy's car. When I turned up, he went, I've got a Tesla. It's metallic. And I was like, all right, fair enough. I don't know what that means.

33:11but I imagine it's like wrapped cool. And it was wrapped, but not cool. Let me show you. People were giving me the wanker sign in the street. They just listened to the pod.

33:24They were walking past going, you tosser, and stuff like that. Oh, wow. Yeah, and the lovely... That's some car. Mate, honestly, the lovely fellow that runs the body shop, he is absolutely lovely, and he listens to the show, but the car is mental. And he actually says, like, he said, did you get any looks? I said, any lurks? I got called a fucking nonce about 20 times again. Did he go, maybe they just listened to the pod? Yeah, that's exactly what he said. What would I search to find this, Stevie? Silver car? Nonce car. Silver car. AI is very good now at finding it. Silver car. Talk amongst yourselves, I'll find this.

33:56It is basically, it's the same car Jack had, a Tesla, but shiny silver, looked like a disco ball. Okay. It's like a mirror. The whole thing is like a mirror. While he's doing that, should we just talk about something else? Yeah, how you been? All right, thank you. been up to much other than skegness and stuff i'll tell you what i've been up to once he's found you silver k oh got it got it got it got it got it got it got it so robbie this this this was the car right so fucking hell i think it's made of tinfoil yeah literally we played football one weekend and jack parked in a car park away from the actual pitch because he didn't want any of his friends to see him yeah i went into into uh shopping center in norwich and um then the next day i saw jack smith who's been on this podcast yeah um and uh he i picked i picked him up and he went what the fuck is that he went i can't i can't even um i don't even want to get in that car and then he went i saw another fucking twat driving a car like this in into yesterday and i went oh that was that was me but the fact that he'd actually remembered that car well you're I'm not forgetting it.

35:02I know, I know, I know. But yeah, I have fucked my car up a little bit now. It's mad that people do get that done, isn't it? Yeah. Someone's... No disrespect to the person who listens to the podcast, but he's gone. This'll be class. Yeah. I also like that Jack said he listens to the podcast and he still trusted him enough to let him use his own car for two weeks. Yeah, I know, because he knows that... He probably wants it smashed up. He's embarrassed by it. I'll give him a chat for two weeks, he'll be fucking written off. No, since you're on his claim happy days. Yeah, you keep... Are you going to stop smashing up cars or are you just going to keep going forever?

35:36Keep doing it, I think. That's a bit of... Like, you can't change who you are, can you? Yeah. No, you can't. That's literally what they're for. I'm a good driver. I'm a bad parker. I always stand by that. Even Fee just went, hmm. Yeah, but she... But you've not noticed how much in herself. Wasn't you usually... Yeah, to be fair, she did drive off once I was ripped your arm off at petrol station. Do you remember that? Oh, yeah. A few times that's happened in your car. I've almost been killed by both of you. I know. I think, why don't you reverse? Nah, I don't like reversing. But you've got actual cameras that even show you the lines to go perfectly into the space.

36:10I was like, quick nipping, I'll nip out like that. I didn't want to fucking do a three-point turn, reverse around the corner. I just didn't fancy it. Anyway, do you want to know about this Darts event? Fucking hell, I forgot about that. Yeah, you beat Scott Williams. Yeah, I've done that. And then Chizzy, Dave Chisnell, wanted to go out in Norwich. Okay. So I took Chizzy to Queen of Iceni. That is the weirdest, like, you two together. Yeah, he was round a flat pit. He looked quite cool, actually. But he was steaming. Anyone recognise him? Yeah, people were going, that's fucking Chizzy. Like, dancing in the middle of Queen of Iceni.

36:41Are you dancing with him? You and Dave Chisnell dancing at the Queen of Iceni as a spoon, by the way. Yeah, well, we got them to put on, Dizzy, I'm feeling dizzy. You spoke to the DJ and told them to. Yeah, yeah. They have a DJ in the spoons. Yeah. Queen of Icenia, they do. Yeah, that's the only one in Norwich that does, yeah. But then after, he wanted to go elsewhere, and I said, the only place, this was about one in the morning, I was like, the only place that would be open now would be like Gonzo's. Yeah. So from, this is very Norwich heavy, but from Queen of Icenia, you go over the bridge, past the waterfront, down to Gonzo's that way, and he didn't want to get on the bridge.

37:15He was on the bridge, but he was going, he was pretty drunk, and he was going, this is not the quickest way. And I was going, what do you mean it's not the quickest way? And he was going, nah, nah. And I went, one, you don't know where we're going. And two, I'm from Norwich. And he was just going, it can't be over a bridge. It just can't be over a bridge. It's the other way of rivers. Yeah, so I said, all right, I'll follow you then. And then I followed him for about five minutes and then he just went, I don't know. Were you drunk as well? No, I was going, I'm from Norwich, shizzy. Yeah, but you've agreed to follow him.

37:45Because I was like, all right, maybe you do know. And he's clearly no stranger to a pub. Yeah. But I was like, all right, show me what you got about you then. And then he sort of walked around Bella Italia and went. and that was it was it a good night I didn't go to Gonzo's I sort of left him outside he was with loads of others he left on his own in Norwich where he doesn't know no but I had football the next day so I had to get home yeah fair enough that is so weird yeah that was an interesting interesting time but I just love the darts Stevie that's me mate you do love the darts that's me and for now what have you been up to you must have done some shit right yeah I went back to Wales for a few days nice so we could see Ariane and Isaac's family yeah Robbie's fucked off already no fucking hell start us speaking for three seconds no I was just playing battle cards hang man yeah don't worry about it don't worry about it you've done loads I was trying to suddenly while the camera was on you just to check because I knew there was something I'd missed out and it feels like we're expanding this into a massive all-court app so we might need to try to extend this because we're getting beyond the bit well I've got a full episode planned but I think we're past the point that we could do that.

38:56So you see, how are they? Yeah, they're all doing well. We actually specifically went back to go to Bristol to see your guys' favourite movie on stage. Can I guess? Yeah. Shrek. Your favourite movie, Shrek. No, I was thinking what's got a stage adaptation. It was the world premiere of The Greatest Showman musical in theatres at the Bristol Hippodrome where we did Round Sheep. Wow. Yeah. Was it sold out? Sold out for, I think they were doing it for about four weeks every single night completely sold out it's not been anywhere else in the world starting at bristol hasn't even been announced yet whether it's even going to go to london but it will because it was completely sold out and they changed the story a bit though oh actually when we first got there the queue was huge so you just stood in this queue and a load of drunk boys went past and it's the first time i've heard it in years but remember when we first started the podcast you'd always start by going stevie white white white a few drunk boys walked past i'm in this huge queue and um they're just going ole ole ole ole and as they go past me they go stevie white white white and everyone in the crowd just turns and stares at me and i was so uncomfortable i so thought you were gonna say everyone in the crowd joined me everyone in this huge queue was just staring at me and i was like i've never felt more uncomfortable because then i just had to stand never there were some years where i'm just gonna say yeah but like honestly i was like everyone just stared at me and i'm stuck in this queue just like that i can imagine you laughing it up i can imagine you going it made me so uncomfortable you bunt you to be doing that oh yeah if i was two bunch steve he's all over that and a little bit campy i guess yeah if i was drunk on a good again everyone else get involved it's like when you i love it sometimes you'll be like the most sombre person ever and then get you to the darts at christmas and like like they'll be coming up the t-shirt kind of and steve would be up on the table fireball dude i like a drink i like a drink you do like a drink but yeah that was really awkward um but yeah we went in to watch it it was quite cool as a show because obviously normally when you go to a theater you're just watching a theater performance and you're kind of knowing you're aware that you're just watching it but because the concept of The Greatest Showman is that it's also a performance in the show, the crowd was kind of immersed in it.

41:18Like he talked to the crowd a lot as if you were his circus crowd. But it was also a theatre show and a circus thing because people were swallowing swords and doing all these mad flips and throwing fire about and stuff on stage. That was quite cool. But the thing I wanted to bring up... That's quite cool. I like a circus. But the thing I want to bring up is The Greatest Showman obviously has quite a big moment on Happy Hour. from Robbie being unaware of why Zendaya's character couldn't be with Zac Efron's character. Yeah, Robbie don't see colour. Yeah, because back in the 1800s, it was frowned upon.

41:49Yeah, yeah. I thought that was going to be a joke about me, like back in 18s when Robbie was growing up. No, no. I've read it for now, yeah. No, so in the interval, I was speaking to... They hadn't approached why they couldn't be together yet. What do you mean? At the interval, they hadn't got to the point in the show where they're going, oh, these two characters, and wheeler and um whatever his name is shouldn't be together but in the interval i'm speaking to matt and i say i don't know how they're gonna do that in this because in the stage show that they've just put on the bearded lady was a black lady and the nine foot tall man was a black man so i was thinking like can they still do that storyline when everyone seems fine with those two yeah but and then the um lady who he shouldn't be with was mixed race yeah that was her only difference yeah so it'd be a bit weird if they're going oh not her but then they're okay so i was i'd said it to matt i was like maybe they will just still do it and just ignore the fact yeah instead they didn't trans no i'm trying to think of something instead they said what jack got something different okay um instead there's like a review from that guy who constantly says their shit in the newspapers and he just says she used to be a lady of the streets yeah so they don't go you can't be with her she's black instead they're just going you can't be with her she was a prostitute and I thought that's so weird to take that element of the story out yeah but especially back in the day because prostitutes were way more common weren't they I don't know I see them walking about all the time how many times have you been walking about in the 1800s I just imagine like old Victorian London or anywhere in the UK they'd be like there's the blacksmith there's the shoesmith there's the whore brothels maybe might have been a more normal thing but yeah i thought that was quite strange murderers would like kill like jack the ripper yeah like if you said to me now go and kill 12 prostitutes in norwich why would i i wouldn't be able to find one what that would be your problem yeah you're getting the internet i reckon yeah i think now you just go yeah so back in the day they didn't have internet no so they were standing on the street like that When I was at uni, apparently the road with all the prostitutes on, apparently.

44:05No, what people would say was down by the waterfront. That was the area, apparently, as you go. And you would see people on the street corner there. Really? Yeah. Wow. That's why Choozie wouldn't walk over the bridge.

44:23He knows. Recognised. I thought you'd like that part of it. But yeah, I really enjoyed the show. Very good. Is it a camp show? Well, yeah, it's The Greatest Showman. It's got the main song. Because it's like two hours 45 with the interval, they've added maybe three or four brand new songs that aren't in the movie. Oh, right. And little elements of the story they've changed as well. One of the baby shark? No, new ones. Kanye wrote one. They've written new songs for it, which were good. But yeah, I really enjoyed it. The main lady from it, I've seen on stage before. She was Elsa in Frozen. so she was now she gets about and she was Les Mis in the Les Mis movie Samantha Barks leave some work for the rest of us I think she's really very well known in the West End and stuff but she was incredible and Propel Fitness Water with Gatorade electrolytes zero sugar and vitamins Propel Hydrates better than water to help you get the most out of your workout and get back to your best self what propels you Propel with Gatorade electrolytes Fall has never looked or tasted this good.

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46:13In the movie, her character, P.T. Barnum's wife, is kind of a nothing character. So my least favourite song in the movie is a song called Tightrope because you don't really care about his wife that much. But she's such a huge part in this adaptation of it that she sings Tightrope and I was like, she's very good. but I just don't like the song. But then they kind of sing bits of tightrope again about another three times. That's my least favourite song. A bit frustrating for me. I often find whenever I go to the theatre, I'm blown away of the talents of the people on the stage because they can sing, dance and act.

46:42So it's like a triple threat. And I think, why are these people not more famous than your traditional movie screen actors? Because when we saw Hamilton, I didn't have a fucking clue what went on from start to finish. Could not tell you what that was about. But the... about the life of Alexander Hamilton yeah but what I wouldn't even be able to tell you what he did do you know do you hear anything about him he's someone who discovered America oh no then I don't know there's a lot of politics I don't know I was watching it going I can't get it I just can't grasp it but every single actor in that performance I think has more talent than Jake Gyllenhaal fucking hell you've gone for such a massive actor as well imagine james with this podcast but can he sing dance and act at the same time we don't necessarily know well until i see him in hamilton he's nothing to me but i think they can't all be in hamilton i think it's a bit of a different type i don't respect anyone unless they're in hamilton okay wow that is i think it's a different type of acting and singing as well isn't it like the the main guy in this sounded and weirdly looked quite a lot like Hugh Jackman as well and he sounded really similar to him both in talking and singing his Petey Barnum I mean but probably a better singer because I don't think Hugh Jackman's the most amazing singer he's more of like a stage singer and I think there is a difference in that yeah yeah but they don't really do like stage singers in movies no but it's like if so like Messi's obviously brilliant at football but if you could do it's like imagine if there was a sport that was like football whilst playing tennis whilst playing golf like the average player that was good at that would be better than Messi at different things yeah I think it's more honing a specific craft it wouldn't necessarily be better than Messi at football yeah that weird sport that you've invented which isn't necessarily good there enough i'm just trying to do sort of big up but hamilton yeah okay so your pinnacle of acting is something that you have no idea what was going on yeah i saw like a 10 year old in school of rock once and i was like that's better than anything is it just you've only seen two things which are the things you think are the best no i i think like that that nine-year-old kid or 10-year-old kid has probably had like has got more about them than dame judy dench

49:22dame now if i and jill and all sat together listening to the pod as they do every week they'll be like oh not now not you too judy we agree though that the people in the theater are incredible yeah like it is insane why don't they get the kind of money that hollywood actors get i imagine they're paid fairly well yeah but i don't know but i think it's mental yeah i think i think good theater actors are probably paid quite well but i don't think it's the same as a move but i think it's yeah economically it's the money they bring in you could do it no not a chance i think it's sometimes like when you're when like you look at tickets and tickets for the theater can be mad expensive yeah but then like there's 40 different people on stage everyone doing everything backstage all the rehearsal time and everything that went into it yeah it must cost so much to put on every night as well.

50:09Yeah. Imagine you guys are talking like this when I've literally just informed you that you're in the presence of an actor who will be on the large stage in a park in a summer performing as a bar. Are you getting paid for that? No. Are you treating it as an acting gig or karate gig? Well, probably a bit of both, really. But mostly acting, I think, really. You'll be in Hamilton next. Yeah, thank you. Is it going to be kind of like a dance routine? I don't really think so, Stevie. I think I'll probably just have about six pints and just wander around the stage a bit. And what are you going to do after you're done with your karate?

50:45I don't know. I haven't really thought that through. Are you staying for the streets? Oh, yeah, yeah. Not still doing it for them. When he asked me to do it, he said, do you want to do this? He said, actually, you'll probably just want to get pissed and enjoy the day. I don't give a shit if the show's good, mate. I'll get pissed and still do it. It'd be fine. It's not my career. What would you do if you came off stage are you going to be wearing the raven wings and everything? Yeah. The raven? What is it? It's called the heron, mate. I think it's a fucking raven. The heron wings. Are you going to wear that and the bird thing?

51:15You're going to be in the full getup? I'm going to be the heron, yeah. What would you do if you walk off stage and Mike's going to come over and go, I like that. Can you do that for our set as well? I'd fucking do it for the all caught up. I wouldn't want to do it. I'd rather go and just drink with everyone. But I would do it just for all caught up. At the moment, when you start watching the streets, it's ruined by me, shit-faced wandering around as a heron i i imagine it was for some reason gonna look like when sasha baron cohen came out as the big fucking eagle and got his ass in him and em's face probably a bit yeah yeah maybe um i'll get maybe pete asked me to do it for baby shambles as well i'll just keep doing it all evening i'll just desperately get off to sneak out and a new musician will drag me up i'm so there for it i'm i'm gonna film it good thank you i appreciate I appreciate that.

51:59It's going to go on here. A couple of other bits of news. Well, one other bit of news. When we were away the other day, we got the phone call. Flash the Tortoise has woken from hibernation. Thank fuck for that. I thought you were going to say something else. I thought he was going to be dead. Yeah, I thought he was going to be dead in a box. Nah, he was in a box hibernating, but now he's out of the box, I think. He should be living forever, shouldn't he? Yeah, he's only 100, right? It's spring chicken. yeah so he's out which means Kitty's going to be taking him for walks again soon how long had he been hibernating for winter mate winter time fair enough when's the last time Kitty walked in yeah people every now and then online go to yeah we've not had that update flash for a while hibernation mate yeah that's what they do so you when winter comes you put him in a box I don't I don't know it's not his it's not his tortoise oh no it's your neighbours tortoise Someone random.

52:55We don't know your neighbour. Bev met him on Walking Flash. And what... Friend did. See, I never really get this about... So Flash, randomly just being walked around. Flash gets taken out. Oh, I learnt some great Flash lore as well, because Kitty was telling me more about Flash. I don't know as much about Flash as Kitty. Yeah. Flash has got a... Flash has got a mark on his shell. Yeah. Didn't know the history of this. Apparently, like 60 years ago or something, Flash fell off a wall went down a waterfall went missing for three months what? how was he found? just wandering around just saw Flash there's Flash did they have like an air tag on it or something?

53:39no not back in the day 60 years ago it's like a really long time ago Flash just yeah just fell off and they thought oh Flash's dead Flash made a comeback wow Flash's a ledge isn't it mental that he was just knocking about 100 years ago? yeah like he'll look at you and go Flash is older than everyone we know and Flash will every child of Flash will outlive me and maybe you If Flash fancied you, Robert, he'd be a P-No Yeah Yeah He would be a non-store of toys We spoke about it on the pod but I met a tortoise the other day a massive one called Titan Picked it up, had all shit all over its belly You shat on it Because I like my arse limit so when are you saying Flash again?

54:27well I don't know it's not really me who do this with Flash because he takes Flash I don't take Flash and walk I will come along and have a little look have you had any progress in seeing if you can get Flash as a future no it's a long game there's no rush Flash can live for ages get Flash up there with Shmerrick yep probably I don't know whether you can just bring do the heron pose on Flash I don't think that's going to be good for Flash how big is Flash? quite small not that big oh this fucker I saw was like that big that's different different species Fash is a small boy and Kitty takes it for a little walk he takes it out on a lead no not on a lead don't think that's possible because then he just put his head in and he'd be off the lead no Fash will just he'll just put it on the grass and he'll just walk around eat grass for a bit Kitty just walks along nearby and then if he starts to go too far away gets picked up moved back somewhere how fast are you walking do you know what I can for a for an animal that's famously slow they're surprisingly not that slow they can cover a bit of ground this one I had, I was giving it a whole cucumber it was proper gnawing on it it makes me realise that dinosaurs never went away fact they are dinosaurs aren't they yeah they're tortoises, a bit of similar vibe while we're on facts sharks older than the north star get that in you sharks 450 million sharks older than trees bet you didn't know that are they?

55:54yeah sharks 450 mil years old trees between 350 and 390 million years old take that and do whatever you want so one day there's been a shark in the sea and he's going to look at it have you fucking seen that over there? what the fuck is that? that's mental yeah yeah you like that? yeah yeah I learned that on TikTok oh so it's probably not true no it is true no the lady that does it fax checks them so she goes if you're hearing it from me it's true Did you say that every clip? If you're hearing it from me, it's true. Oh, that must be true. If she said that she's doing the truth, then she must have the truth.

56:26She wouldn't lie, would she? That's a great update on Flash. Yes, that's good. I went to the barbecue place. Arrogant? Yeah. That wasn't good. Oh, that's one of the things we were going to do on the day, weren't we? That was the plan. Oh, so you still went? I didn't go that day, but I have to. That would have been bad if I'd been walking home and I'd just seen you guys in there together. Yeah, I went. Was it good? It was all right. It's just a new meat gaff that's open. not like Rodizio style. For me, Gonzo's is clear. You love Gonzo's. Gonzo's is clear. If you come to Norwich, go Gonzo's. Fucking unbelievable gaff.

57:01Talking about meat gaff, meat gaff, the idea you sit there and they bring you unlimited meat. Have you been to pizza gaff? We have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pizza gaff's good. Yeah, it's good, isn't it? Unlimited pizza gaff. Face in Norwich where it's unlimited pizza. Moto, is that what it's called? Yeah, Moto Pizza, yeah. Moto Pizza. Very good. We went with Will JC in December. We did, yeah. Yeah, that is banging. What is your fave? Can't remember. All good. That's a banging choice. Thank you. Because we went at Christmas and they had a Christmas dinner and a pizza, didn't they? Yeah, they do like unusual pizza.

57:27They do like your normals and then your unusual ones as well. And they just come around and you can go, I'll have a slice of that. Yeah. And take that. And you can put in requests and the kitchen will take it. Mad. When Becky and I went to meet Santa in Finland. It was just like car meat, but meet Santa. Well, meet Santa. But we were at Santa's village and they sold like pizza with reindeer on it. real reindeer don't know about that but like I get that it's Christmas themed but nowhere in Christmas has been suggested that the centre's fucking eating Rudolph and shit yeah I can't imagine kids would like that either it's expensive as well I had us a bit there good yeah thank you yeah very good yeah so cost a bit of dough your turn Stevie go on Steve's got a good one I went once and I had so many slices I was blitzing it good really good go on stevie you're done he's saving it you got on here i can't think of any of the other ones if you eat it because it's so saucy sometimes you get a little red nose yeah really good jack yeah yeah that wasn't good that was all right yeah yeah go on go on you got one i can't you ain't got one no i haven't no i was trying to think about i've got antlers just do it we won't stag you off because you will have it yeah i'm done stevie go on i've got nothing Really good tweet on a stag do Yeah same David

58:49No I'm done Honestly that pizza it slays That is good I've got nothing We're riffing it I know you've got one He's saving a good one He's waiting for us to run out There's thousands of listeners that are going We've had a shitty crappy all caught up today Stevie will save it with a fucking pan Do it Go on. Go on. Come on, you got this. I don't know the name. Close it back. That's loose. Go on, go on. I've got nothing. It's tag again, mate.

59:27No, you're out. Oh. Oh, no. Sorry. There were so many people with tickets in their basket for cross wires. Close the browser. See, even if I said something, you then would have both been mean to me. Yeah, that's the whole point. Yeah. That was literally the whole vibe of it. Yeah, that's what I was... Whatever, it could have been the funniest thing ever. And we would have held down the laughs just to go, fuck was that, Stevie? That's exactly what would have happened. Yeah, I felt like Hammond, which made me sad. Yeah. I got robbed. My house got robbed. The other day. Your actual house? I got literally robbed.

1:00:05So I was in a spring clean. Yeah. I was getting rid of loads of stuff from upstairs. I had loads of... Like an old computer. like loads of metal bits right and i was like what metal bits like i had an old table with like metal legs on it and i was smashing it up smashing up metal sorry start the story again why are you just smashing up metal you're cleaning out your house right yeah went on amazon i bought like 15 storage like uh full of metal like these stackable plastic things i organized all these things which ones you go for uh i can't remember they were like 30 quid for three and then i I stack them on top.

1:00:42Really useful storage company. Probably. That's the big dogs. Yeah, probably that. And then I had like this table. I had like an old like filing cabinet. I had like a bit of a computer. And I was like, I need to get rid of this stuff. Okay. Get rid of it. So I was going to take it to the skip. Yeah. Which is what you would do. But my dad was like, don't do that. Because he knows a guy that comes around and collects all your scrap metal. Okay. And he sells it on for a prof. Right. Okay. So does this guy give you money or anything? He takes you for free? This is where I've been, I've not so much been robbed, but I've been scammed.

1:01:17Okay. I've been scammed. By your dad? No, but not by my dad, and not by this guy. He's called Clive, by the way. Okay. There you go, right? That's not my dad. So my dad's gone, give Clive a bell, he'll come, he'll pick it up. But there's got to be a fair whack. So I was like, all right, find him bits of metal I don't even want to throw out just to make it work. John the Tesla in there. Fucked anyway. And I'm putting it all outside my house, right? Because I'm like, I'm like that. So we organised for him to come round on last Thursday morning, right? He's called me up, Clive. He's gone, what you got there?

1:01:52I've gone this, this, this, this, this. He's gone, no problem. I'll pop round Thursday morning. I'll give him my address. And he, and the. I know what's going to have happened here. Someone else had the scrap metal, haven't they? Gets worse though. Oh. So in the morning, I get up. Ring doorbell goes. I look on the ring doorbell. Bloke and a woman. Okay, not Clive. I'm like, that's Clive. That's Clive. You don't know Clive. I don't know Clive. Mrs. Clive. Answer the door and they go, hi, we're here for the scrap metal. I go, oh, no worries. Absolutely fine. It's all out here. You can see it all laid out.

1:02:28They're putting it in the back of a car. I thought, I swear he'd have a van. Yeah. But I'm like, I don't know Clive. I don't know what rocks. Right. So I start helping them put it in the back of the car. Yeah. just before I leave and I have been done up like a kipper here they tell me that there's a surcharge and they ask for a 10 what? you give them 10 pounds to put it in their car? they say to get it gone that's just 10 pounds right? 10 pounds they told me the weight of it I was like I don't know how you know the weight because you've not weighed anything why don't you say put it back don't give you 10 pounds I thought well this was my dad's mate I'm doing him a favor he's doing me a favor you still think it's Clive right?

1:03:08I think it's Clive But your dad said he's selling it on for a profit. The profit's from you. So I thought, right, maybe that's to save me a tip to the crib. You think my dad's stitched me up a little bit here? Yeah, that's the tenner. So I go upstairs, get a£10 note, give it to him. They go, thank you. They leave. I pop out, do my day, get back. About one in the afternoon, I'm sat at my computer, editing the video. Yeah. Ring doorbell goes. Yeah. Open the door. Hello, mate. I'm here. Scrub mail. I go, you took it this morning. And he goes, sorry. What do you mean you took it? You took it this morning.

1:03:39No, no, but I'm like, well, your company took it this morning. And he goes, what do you mean? I go, the fellow in front of me. You think it's a company, the people that put scrap metal in the back of their car for a tenner? That's like, listen, the company's house, is it? Did you get us that receipt? And he'd driven from Thetford to mine. And you've just not got it. And he had a van. Yeah, of course he did. He had a van. And then just before he left, he went, oh, I've come a long way. And I felt really gutted. I went, do you want a cup of tea? like what can I do he went and gives a tenner did you show him the ring doorbell of the other two people no I just went mate literally someone came and said I'm here for the scrap metal and took it and he was like I'm so good that's insane I did actually give him I did give him a five so I'm 15 down that is insane yeah I know so I think what has happened is two people have obviously seen it outside and gone let's go and they knew why all the metal was there I think and maybe Clive always does Thursdays and they went if we just go around on Thursday they don't know Clive Clive's come for miles, Clive's not here they've just seen your scrap metal their chances but it's mental that you've not gone are you Clive?

1:04:52so if a boiler man comes if you book a boiler man for a certain day and he's called Sam and then there's a knock at the door at 8 in the morning and they go hiya I'm here to do your boiler are you going to go well Sam can I see some ID brother? did you not no but I probably would have a chat with him go is it Sam I didn't speak to I just was going oh yeah what do you do with all this then what do they do with it all they're going scrap it scrap it on so I don't get are they just going around seeing it and going we'll take that and just ask people who do that people who are into scrap metal go that's free money they don't then ask for the tenner do you know what the worst thing is they've just in a mug yeah you are the mug do you know what the worst thing is what they left some bits they went we can't do much for them left them So they didn't even take everything.

1:05:36Because I was thinking, that's a bit out of order, Clive, because you're asking me for a tenner. So Clive's a bit of a fucking snake there. But it's not Clive. No, but the person who's pretended, the fake Clive is a clown. He's not pretended to be Clive. He's just being himself, and you've fallen for it. Yeah. I'm going to be a little bit risky here. They looked a bit rank. That could have been loads worse. Could have been loads worse. People are allowed to look rank. They look disgusting. And you were like, yeah, my dad's recommended you. I thought, God, Dad, you fucking rub shoulders with some wrong-uns, didn't you, Billy?

1:06:05I'm surprised. Like, you just didn't have a conversation. You could be like, oh, how do you know my dad? No, I don't know. No, not that. I'm quick to fucking take my tea bags and all the pricks. Tea bags? Yeah. What do you mean tea bags? I've done them a cup of tea. What, whilst you helped them with the metal? I've been done up here, haven't I? Massively. I didn't realise how bad this was until I... What have you done with all the stuff they didn't take? Do you still need to go to the tip? I said to Clive, you'd take them bits if you want. Did he? Nah. Nah. I've got a couple couple chair chair legs if you want them if anyone wants them I'm okay thank you alright you're good yeah that was me I'll take them if you give me a tenner oh god nice isn't it yeah it's been a good catch up isn't it yeah it's been a bloody good catch up do we still do the song is that still a thing I think we finish on the song okay we're all caught up baby all caught up now do the other song baby could have been worse could have been worse see you in a few days

1:07:03Jack makes happy hour.

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