In short
Jimmy Carr’s Crowdwork in St. Louis, Missouri, roasting audience members and doing Fuck, Marry, Kill, plus giving blunt parenting advice to a couple expecting a baby.
Guests/backgrounds
Multiple audience volunteers are singled out: Adam (waiter at Great Papa’s Ristorante; Mohican haircut for 18 years); a man named Mark (sells products for reward/incentive programs); a woman who’s a microbiologist; a man named Jason (job interview; cardiac recovery work); Mike (hospital cardiac recovery); and a couple, Jason and Brittany, due tomorrow with a baby boy named Eli.
Key claims
St. Louis is “murder capital” and the food is reheated; day 3 postpartum is the most hormonal/chemical day; “cardiac recovery” implies hands-on cardiac procedures.
Notable examples
Lint-filled belly button jokes; Mohican/punk-rock jokes; Fuck, Marry, Kill choices (Kate Middleton, Ricky Gervais, Gary Glitter).
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOExploring St. Louis and Its Culture
0:00 to 0:27
Jimmy discusses St. Louis culture, humor, and local cuisine.
“DraftKings is now live in all 50 states.”
Exploring St. Louis and Its Culture
0:33 to 1:00
Jimmy discusses St. Louis culture, humor, and local cuisine.
“FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois.”
Exploring St. Louis and Its Culture
1:30 to 5:00
Jimmy discusses St. Louis culture, humor, and local cuisine.
“Louis I know that your city's a sort of dish, your favourite cuisine is a fucking disgrace you can't have as your, oh you've got to come to St.”
Audience Interaction and Roasting
5:00 to 10:00
Jimmy engages with the audience, roasting participants in a fun exchange.
“Maybe you could bring this massive fucking tool home.”
Discussion on Personalities and Jokes
10:00 to 13:00
Jimmy asks the audience about jokes and shares humorous anecdotes.
“DraftKings is now live in all 50 states.”
Audience Interaction and Humor
14:01 to 15:47
Jimmy Carr engages with the audience, sharing jokes and banter.
“Well, it looks like I'm marrying Gary Glitter.”
New Parents and Parenting Advice
15:47 to 17:38
Discussion with a couple expecting their first child, providing humor and advice.
“My wife's due date is tomorrow, so we are trying to laugh this baby out of her, Jason and Brittany.”
Job Interview Anecdote
17:38 to 18:58
A humorous exchange about a job interview in cardiac recovery.
“What sort of thing are you doing at a hospital, Mike?”
Job Interview Anecdote
20:38 to 21:05
A humorous exchange about a job interview in cardiac recovery.
“FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois, 21 and over, void in Canada.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Dave Portnoy here. The wait is over. Football is here and so is DraftKings. DraftKings is now live in all 50 states. One app, every sport, nationwide. New DraftKings customers. Sign up with code SPOTIFY. Spend five bucks to get$200 in rewards within 21 days. Includes all markets. That's code SPOTIFY in partnership with DraftKings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER, 1-800-MY-RESET. Connecticut, call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Kansas, FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21 and over, void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get bonus bets that expire in seven days or trade with DraftKings Predictions to get predictions dollars that expire in one year.
0:44Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable rewards issued as$50. Click to claim every seven days for 21 days. Terms at dkng.co slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on sportsbook predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability. Varies by state. Hello, I'm Jimmy Carr, and this is Crowdwork from St. Louis in America. And I'll be in this one talking about Fuck, Marry, Kill and giving advice to people on their upcoming birth of a child. Pretty good. How do you like the Midwest? Is that where we are?
1:20and it's midwest is it it's not too west you could go too western or if you go any less than this and you're basically in the east so this is the it's the perfect level of west
1:38it's the Goldilocks zone of west the gateway to the west
1:48well I mean yeah you say that, you built an arch, well done it's the tallest arch in America isn't it yeah well done second tallest by the way is like 12 foot
2:05you've really over corrected there I don't know a lot about St. Louis I know that your city's a sort of dish, your favourite cuisine is a fucking disgrace
2:22you can't have as your, oh you've got to come to St. Louis the food's incredible, they'll reheat yesterday's pasta it's not a fucking thing people someone else invented ravioli fucking heating it up again doesn't change anything
2:42Hey, cheer up, murder capital.
2:47Pow, pow, pow.
2:52I don't know why it's the murder capital. It seems a very friendly place. You make very agreeable booze, and then somehow, I think it might be because people arrive here and think it's called St. Louis, and then, yeah, you get annoyed and people get murdered.
3:14Roast me. Roast you? Okay. Let me have a look at it. What's your name, my friend? Adam. Adam? Yeah, there's a lot going on there.
3:33What do you do for a living? Adam, because everything about your look says minimum wage is fine. What do you do? Serve it. What, sorry? Serve it. Serve it. Well, we've all got to serve. I mean, that's... Who do you serve? Family restaurant. You serve in a family restaurant. Funny there was a name for that. Waiter. You're a waiter. And what's the restaurant? What's it called? Great Papa's Ristorante. Something Popper's Ristorante. Are you doing the reheated ravioli?
4:12Of course you fucking are. So talk me through the Mohican. Is it a punk rock thing? A what? Punk rock. Sure. Yeah, Mohawk, yeah. I don't know if he knows. They will sell you punk rock records even with my haircut. 18 years. You've had that for 18 years? Wow. And what was the... It doesn't look as if you were getting too much pussy before, but I... I imagine that is a very effective repellent. You know what? I'll try and hook you up. Are there any women that want to get back at their dad for something?
5:05Maybe you could bring this massive fucking tool home.
5:12You've had a Mohican for the last 18 years, and at no point has that been fashionable.
5:22Wow. Who are you here with? You're making him look good.
5:32He's a very average-looking bloke. He looks fucking terrific next to you. Huh? Wow. What's the rudest joke you ever wrote? What's the what? The rudest joke you ever wrote. Rudest. The rudest joke.
5:59The rudest. You know how it's not pronounced.
6:09The rudest joke. Well, I did. I used to have this bit about speech impediment.
6:18That I think you might find quite rude.
6:28Rude joke. You're not in a cartoon, stop speaking like that. Shout out to my husband Michael for his 46th birthday. I love his belly button.
6:42Michael, where's Michael? Have you got a particularly... No. What, sorry? No, nothing. There's nothing strange about your belly button. Who is it? I'm going to have to ask your other half about this because... Um, what?
7:05It just collects the lint. That's what they're for. Okay. Seems like an odd thing to share, though, doesn't it? Of all the things you could say about Budget the Rock.
7:34I've said worse things to people, yeah. What do you do, sir? I'm a manager. You're a manager. Do you mean you're just coping? I manage. What do you manage? Healthcare. You manage healthcare. In America? How are we doing? You fucked up. You fucked up. And what about you, madam? What do you do? I'm a microbiologist. You're a microbiologist. How small? Very. What do you do, then? What do you do? Grow up and diagnose people who have infections. You grow up the bacteria and diagnose people with infections. I'm a belly button. Could you... From his belly button lint, presumably, yeah. Christ, have you been there the whole time?
8:31Look at the fucking size of it. What? Should you not be holding a door open somewhere?
8:43Imagine the amount of lint in that.
8:48My husband and I agree whoever you insult the worst tonight gets to be on top. He thinks you won't notice us. Now I have to peg him if you do. Where are ya?
9:03Hi. Ah, be gentle.
9:11It'll be your first time.
9:24Well, how delightful.
9:29What's your name, sir? Mark. And what do you do, Mark? I'm insane. And what do you sell? Is it strap-ons? Roll up, roll up. We've got a hell of a demonstration. Go on, what do you sell, Mark? Products for reward and incentive programs. Products for reward and incentive programs. Yep. He's in what? He's in what? Porn. He's in porn. There's an incentive program for porn.
10:03Dave Portnoy here. The wait is over. Football is here and so is DraftKings. DraftKings is now live in all 50 states. One app, every sport, nationwide. New DraftKings customers. Sign up with code SPOTIFY. Spend five bucks to get$200 in rewards within 21 days. Includes all markets. That's code SPOTIFY. in partnership with DraftKings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER, 1-800-MY-RESET. Connecticut, call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Kansas, FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21 and over, void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get bonus bets that expire in seven days or trade with DraftKings Predictions to get predictions dollars that expire in one year.
10:47Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable rewards issued as$50. Click to claim every seven days for 21 days. Terms at dkng.co slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on sportsbook predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability. Varies by state.
11:09She just says things. Yeah. What about you? What do you do, madam? I'm in sales.
11:22What do you sell? Refrigeration products. What do we? Refrigeration products. Refrigeration products.
11:37I don't even know what a refrigeration product is. Is it a fridge?
11:46You keep ice creams cold.
11:54I normally wouldn't say this, sir. But have you considered leaving her?
12:03She seems like she's a lot.
12:10Okay. Well, you can both go and fuck yourselves. Which is, I think, what you had in mind anyway. Has anyone ever told me I look like a sophisticated Pee-wee Herman? Has anyone ever told me I look like a sophisticated Pee-wee Herman? I'll take it.
Read the full transcript
12:29I mean, yeah, sharp-dressed man, Pee-wee Herman. I've got no notes. I do have kind of a weird laugh, yeah, I could... And I'm often masturbating in gay cinema, so this is... Perfect. Not that that's his legacy. He was fucking great, Peter Herman. Your crudest joke. How do you make a gay fuck a woman? Shit in her cunt.
12:58He asked.
13:03What, sorry? That's called an Alabama hot pocket. That's called an Alabama hot pocket.
13:23Reasons to visit Alabama. Minus one.
13:33Fuck, marry, kill. Yeah, that's the order I was doing.
13:40Done. Fuck, marry, kill. That's, yeah. What, what? Sorry, we're now doing, oh, what, you want three specific people? Okay, just give me one at a time. Kate Middleton. Kate Middleton, fuck. Ricky Gervais. Ricky Gervais. I guess he's competition, kill. And then who? Gary Glitter. Gary Glitter? Well, it looks like I'm marrying Gary Glitter. I was a huge fan of Gary Glitter. And then I found out about his music.
14:17Ha! Silly. Are you a red-diner, Mouth is lit! No!
14:31It's reserved. Okay, drill sergeant.
14:37I've got a microphone and 15 speakers in the room. And I feel like I'm the one that needs to tell you to pipe down.
14:47It's a bit too... What's your name, my friend? Bo. Right. Feels like they kept that simple on purpose.
15:03What are we going to call him? Bo. It's a very simple noise to make. a noise you could make even if perhaps you didn't have as much oxygen as they would wish at birth who? who?
15:21you've got something of a of mice and men quality to you
15:32sorry you obviously won't get that reference what I'm saying is You look like a massive retard.
15:47My wife's due date is tomorrow, so we are trying to laugh this baby out of her, Jason and Brittany. Where are you? Where are those? Hi. Hi there. How are you? Doing good. So what, what, is this your first baby? Your first baby. Well, this is, you've got tickets to the greatest show on earth. All right. And now, do we know what we're having? You're having a boy or a girl? A boy. What the Chinese call a keeper.
16:24And have you sorted the name? What are you going to call it? Eli. Eli. What a great name. I love it. No notes. Enjoy.
16:35It's good, right? I'm trying to think if I've got any good parenting advice. Not much. I'd say be very sensitive, sir, about day three. Day three after the birth is when the cholesterol changes to milk. And it's the most chemicals a woman ever has in her. It's like the most hormonal day they'll ever have. And you just fucking take it.
17:11I would venture you won't be doing a lot right on that day. That's fine. These are exciting days ahead for you. Fucking tremendous. Yeah, hey, no problem at all. Happy to help. You'll be in for a while now.
17:32I have a big job interview on Tuesday. Can you give me a reference? Thanks in advance. Mike, where are you, Mike? Back here. Hi, Mike. So what's the job, Mike? I put the first job at a hospital. A job at a hospital? What sort of thing are you doing at a hospital, Mike? Cardiac recovery. Cardiac recovery. I don't know if a reference for me is going to carry a lot of weight. This guy's all heart, something like that. I don't know. What else can I put? Hang on, ease off. Just the mention of cardiology has gone to get...
18:16You'll never take me alive, he's saying.
18:21Spent good money blocking these arteries. Fuck you. Well, good luck. So what's the cardiac recovery? So is that like a nursing practitioner thing where you help people? I think that they're cardiac procedures. You do cardiac procedures? Okay. I don't know. Sounds like he might be a doctor. But he's not saying he's a doctor. It's not a doctor or a nurse. You'll have a look at it, will you?
18:58Wow, and there's me thinking American healthcare's fucked. This have-a-go hero's willing just to roll his sleeves up and, yeah, you've got a problem with your heart, no insurance, fucking all right, I'll get Mike.
19:16Mike, this one's for you, do your best.
19:23Full disclosure, if you mention my name when you buy gold at the Pure Gold Company, they will give me a tiny little bit of gold. That's how this works. I wouldn't lie to you, just being a straight shooter. I am not a grifter. I wouldn't sell you something that I don't use myself. So I use the Pure Gold Company. If you'd like to invest in physical gold as well, just click the link in the description or head to the pure-gold.co slash jimmy to get your free copy of their investor guide. That's pure-gold.co slash jimmy. Mention my name when you speak to them and you'll get six months of storage secure for your bullying absolutely free.
19:58My God, I'm good to you. If you want to be in the room and actually heckle me, you're going to need a ticket. Go to jimmycar.com and buy one. Dave Portnoy here. The wait is over. Football is here and so is DraftKings. DraftKings is now live in all 50 states. One app, every sport, nationwide.
20:26with DraftKings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER, 1-800-MY-RESET, Connecticut. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org. On behalf of Boothill Casino in Kansas, FedTax pass-through may apply in Illinois, 21 and over, void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get bonus bets that expire in seven days or trade with DraftKings Predictions to get predictions dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable rewards issued as$50. Click to claim every seven days for 21 days. Terms at dkng.co slash offer.
20:59Limited time offer. Nationwide based on sportsbook predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability. Varies by state.
From the publisher
Who said romance is dead?
To see Jimmy on tour go to http://jimmycarr.com for tickets.
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https://pure-gold.co/jimmy
Just click the link in the description to get your free copy of their investor guide.
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