In short
Jimmy Carr does crowd work in Folkestone, England, focusing on audience members’ personal details, jokes, and heckling. A drunk man (Adam) is repeatedly disruptive and is ultimately escorted out, while his wife stays and becomes part of the banter. Afterward, Carr continues with more audience Q&A, including health/grief and “what TV show would you do” questions.
Guests (audience members) and backgrounds
- Adam Pratt: project manager; drinks heavily; ankle tag scheduled at 9:30; jokes about “Chav Nav”; claims he looks after his wife.
- Adam’s wife: makes cosmetics; stays through the show; answers Love Island/naked attraction questions.
- Other named/identified attendees: Stuart (mentioned as a fan/interruptor), Corey (engineer; complains about his name), Darren (works at Eurotunnel), Laura (factory/testing engineering equipment; has a “hole in her heart” needing further treatment), Ollie (funeral-related), plus several unnamed audience members.
Key claims/examples
- Adam’s wife “trooper” status; Adam is kicked out for chipping in while drunk.
- Health jokes: “four slipped discs,” diabetes, cancer recovery with bald head.
- Grief/palliative care discussion and “grief is the price you pay for love.”
- Laura’s heart operation didn’t close the hole; “cowboys” allegedly didn’t use stitches; possible second opinion/second operation.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOAudience Interaction with Adam
0:24 to 1:34
Jimmy interacts with Adam, a member of the audience, humorously probing his background.
“I don't want to be a dick about it, but Adam's at the early show because an ankle tag's gonna go off at 9.30.”
Adam's Project Management
1:34 to 2:34
Adam shares his role as a project manager while Jimmy humorously questions him.
“I love you too, but I think we should see other people.”
Discussion on Relationships
2:34 to 4:19
Jimmy jokes about Adam's relationship with his wife and their dynamics.
“Jesus, I imagine you've got spotless windows though, haven't you?”
Heckler Ejection
4:19 to 10:40
A drunk audience member, Adam, is humorously escorted out after disruptive behavior.
“I love you being here I love the missus being here Can we get you at a seven?”
Jimmy's TV Show Aspirations
10:40 to 14:00
Jimmy discusses the TV shows he would like to do, including Love Island and Naked Attraction.
“It must be like a wardrobe falling on you with a key in it.”
Cancer and Baldness
14:00 to 16:00
Jimmy interacts humorously with an audience member about baldness and cancer.
“I did a joke about the soldiers, and I think those are both groups.”
Audience Member Interactions
16:00 to 19:20
Jimmy engages with various audience members, including discussions on names and occupations.
“I said this is folks doing this shit is normal, mate.”
Discussing Life and Grief
19:30 to 28:00
Jimmy shares thoughts on grief and engages with an audience member about personal loss.
“So that was one of the 11 cocks you were wanking off, put your back at?”
Heart Surgery and Cruise Ship Adventures
28:00 to 30:22
A humorous exchange about health and traveling adventures on a cruise ship.
“You had to have something put inside it, and they were hoping it would close over.”
The Joy of Live Comedy
31:00 to 31:21
Jimmy Carr shares his views on the benefits of attending live comedy shows.
“It's an excuse to see mates, have a few drinks, you'll be supporting a local theatre and you'll have a great laugh.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00From athletic stuff like a full court pickup game, swish, to athletic-ish stuff like a half mile stroll. Get those steps in! Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. Hello, I'm Jimmy Carr and this is Crowdwork. This time I'm in Folkestone and I'm kicking a guy out of the audience, but his wife stays. Weird. What's your name? No, dear Fiverr. What can... what? Argh! That's literally the joke I just made. Although I like you. Do me a favour. I'm from Central fucking Casting. Oi oi! What's your name, my friend?
0:47Adam. Adam, what'd you do, Adam? Not a lot. It's for the best, Adam. You'd only fuck it up. This...
1:03I don't want to be a dick about it, but Adam's at the early show because an ankle tag's gonna go off at 9.30. Do you even call it an ankle tag? I like to call it Chav Nav. Stop right there. Stop right there. Right, so my surname is Pratt, P-R-A-T-T. Okay. My surname is Adam A. Pratt. Right. It's not easy being funny, is it?
1:31Swing and a miss, I'd say, Adam. I'd say first day of primary school, you're on a fucking winner there. Stuart! Yes. I love you. Sorry, was I interrupting?
1:44I actually love you. I love you too, but I think we should see other people. A messy break-up now. Go on, what did you do, Adam? So, I'm a project manager. You're a project manager? What's the project, on the Romans or dinosaurs?
2:01It's a double mountain, I'm sure you've done a great job. What story? I look after my wife. You look after your wife. Well, those are two different stories. The first story was about project management. That is the project management. The project is looking after your wife. You know what I'm talking about. No. I haven't got a fucking idea what you're talking about. I imagine your wife is also a carer for you.
2:33It's like the human centipede at your house.
2:40Jesus, I imagine you've got spotless windows though, haven't you?
2:53I assume your wife has mental health problems, yes? Yeah. Well, marrying that would be the... That's the fucking tell, isn't it? What do you do, love? I make some cosmetics. You do what, sorry? I make cosmetics. You make cosmetics. Can you buy in? I wish you would, Adam. A lot of people over there, I could feel them murmuring, they were going, Adam's not said anything in fucking ages. When did Adam's go? We bought a ticket to see Adam. Oh, no, wait, I remember. Just one thing. Just one thing. You've got a nephew? Shall I write this down? It feels important.
3:36My nephew worked in the Burlington Arcade in Philly, and he snipped your feet to sell you your tunes. Okay.
3:49Adam, I love your excitement. I think you're great oh has someone gone over to have a word no don't worry I'll deal with this I'm not about Adam he's fucking fine day drinking's not for everyone that's what we've learnt
4:06you sometimes see people in a park with a can of strong cider in the afternoon you think I don't know whether I could handle that he's found out the hard way he can't fucking handle that I've got you a 10 Adam I love you being here I love the missus being here Can we get you at a seven? Look, because I want other people to join in and I think other people might think oh, do you have to be a bit special to join You'd like jokes about please have at it Not you Any other Any
4:48I don't know how large the hot air balloon's going to be, but to carry that won't be easy. What? Just saying, Adam's a big fucking eunuch. Looks like someone's drawn a face on a thumb. And then somehow dropped it on a barber's... No, hand down. No, nothing. Nothing. You're fine. You shush for a bit. Shush. Any other? Do I still make my girlfriend cum? Do I still make my girlfriend cum? What are you saying? What are you saying? I said apart from Adam, do you still make your girlfriend cum? Apart from Adam. These two sentences don't go together. I know you think you're making sense. Shh. You've got quite a red sort of colour as well.
5:46You're a couple of jokes away from a fucking heart attack. I'm going to do my best.
5:53Where are we going to bury it? Any other questions? What else have we got? Yeah, how do you break down when you can't?
6:05I'm just going to look at him. Where's your neck?
6:13Most people have got a neck. What if someone tried to wring your neck? Where would they even start? Shoulders have just tapered off. He's off to get the defib. He's not having a heart attack yet. Da-dunk. We'll try and bring that back. Sit down. God love you. He's having a great fucking night. What's my view on annoying cunts? I'm sort of alright with it. No, no, no. Adam, Adam, you're one more interruption away from ruining your evening. And I don't want you to, Adam. I want you to stay and enjoy the show. But if you chip in again, I'm gonna fuck you out of the place, mate. Thank you for the grace.
7:02Thank you. Look. Security looking a little bit nervous, like, well... Oh no, we've got some DEI hires on security. Fucking hell. I don't know if you can go and get some steroids and come back, but... The fuck are you going to do with that?
7:24You can probably roll it out.
7:30Fine. Any other questions? Shush, shush, shush. Read the room, Adam, shush. any other why do we have to put that with Adam? well hang on these twins over here
7:47Christ
7:51will I do another show with Catherine Ryan? I think I will probably at some stage I like I like go shush shush Adam no no Shush. What's the worst gig you've done in what's happened? What's the word? What's the worst gig you've done in where? What's the worst gig I've done? I don't know. I mean... It's odd. I would say it's not good or bad. It's boring. Boring would be bad. Bad is good. Sometimes. So you go and do a gig and it's fucking rowdy and crazy. Fucking great. Fun. I don't mind it. Sometimes it's just blah. You know, the Milton Keynes can be a bit, meh. This place is going to be, yeah, it's fucking, phew.
8:42This is why you can't have nice things. Have you ever wandered around your town and gone, why can't we have nice things? This cunt.
9:03Ah, you've got to go, mate. I'm so sorry, but you've kind of chipped in again.
9:14Let's be as super nice about it as we can and get him a drink, sort him out. What, sorry? There's going to be a bit of street theatre now. As someone has escorted from the room. It's probably a good indicator. Adam, I really appreciate you being here. Come back another time, mate. We'll sort you out with tickets for next time, when you've had a bit less to drink. Well, thanks for coming, mate. We will sort you out for tickets for another time. I'll be back later in the year. We'll sort you out. Good luck. You need a few fewer drinks. That's all right. Look, we've all had a few too many drinks and made cunts of ourselves at some stage.
9:53Adam's had a few too many this evening. It's not a fucking disaster. He's going to go off and have a pint now. It'll be fine. we'll recover this the show will be five minutes longer than it would have been
10:04bye Adam don't be like that
10:17he's off to find his neck
10:25All right, let's do a GoFundMe and buy a lot of a Zenfic. Like a lot. Did the missus stay? You stayed. You fucking trooper.
10:50What a woman. It must be like a wardrobe falling on you with a key in it.
11:07Lucky to be alive. Is there a TV show that you've always wanted to do but you've never done? Is there a TV show I've always wanted to do but never done? Love Island.
11:23Love Island. Love Island is a very good answer. I'd fucking love to do Love Island. It'd be a very different show. It'd be much more predatory.
11:37Love Island brackets, Lord of the Flies edition.
11:45Um... Huh? I don't know. I mean, I kind of... I loved it. I mean, I love... I'm a celebrity. I think that's a fucking great show, and I love Ant & Dec, but I can't be... I mean... You don't think my suits go with it? Yeah, I would insist on wearing this throughout. I just don't think I'd be very good at it. I don't think I'd be very good at... You know, I've got quite a strong gag reflex. I've not been to prison, but I know. Would you do naked attraction? I would do naked attraction. Yes, I fucking would. That'd be excellent. That'd be fucking amazing, wouldn't it? Just pitched up on that. Jesus, a rogues gallery.
12:33I'm just trying to think what the best one to do would be. Yeah, naked attraction would be fucking excellent. That'd be a great way to end your career, right? Instead of doing like a retirement farewell tour, just do, just get your cock and balls out and make it a little bit. Just yeah, you're done. We're laughing at you but not in a fun way now. I can't think how many people at home would go, that's the man.
13:03Put up a crime watch number at the end.
13:09This is great fun to think about TV shows that I would be absolutely shit at. What, sorry? Jim will fix it.
13:25That's due a reboot, isn't it? Making dreams come true for kids, how could that possibly go wrong?
13:36The joke I've had the worst reaction to? Well, I mean, I'm tempted to say one about, you know, people with something terminal, maybe? Yeah, let's walk into it. Why not? What? I don't think he's on the far right. I don't think that's a shaved head. Let's fucking talk about what's going on. I don't know. I mean, probably the gypsy one got me quite a lot of trouble. I did a joke about the soldiers, and I think those are both groups. one shouldn't get in trouble with. Because they're both trained to kill in different ways. What's going on with the bald head, man? What's happening? Cancer, but you were going bald anyway.
14:17That's a very can-do attitude to cancer. All right. I was going bald anyway, so fucking take that, cancer, you cunts.
Read the full transcript
14:31It's fucking... When you think about it, that is fucking harsh. I love it. You got the all clear now? You got the all clear? A decade ago, but you kept the look.
14:50You rarely get that with the people that have recovered 10 years from cancer going, no, I'm keeping the look, I like it. You do suit a bald head, you've got a nice head. It's a good shape. No problem at all. as opposed to that fat gun.
15:07Terrible shape there. What do you do for a living, sir? Well, I make solicitor software. You make? Solicitor software. Solicitor's software. Like for hookers to advertise.
15:27We'll get you laid and we'll get you paid. Hang on, have I just become a pimp? I think I have. Wants to finger blast your asshole. Your son wants to finger blast my asshole. You seem, sir, like a... From athletic stuff like a full-court pickup game, swish, to athletic-ish stuff like a half-mile stroll. Get those steps in. Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. terrible parents. No problem at all, I have an help. What's your son called? What's your name, mate? Cam. What's that? Cam? Yeah. Okay. All right, Cam.
16:10What do you do, Cam? I'm an engineer. You're an engineer? Okay. That's good. It seems to have skipped a generation.
16:21Jimmy, this shit is normal, mate. What's that? I said this is folks doing this shit is normal, mate. Yeah, I've spent enough time in Folkestone over the years to know this is... Can I do it? Yeah. My name's Corey. No, no one cares.
16:39I'm not your parole officer. What's your question, Corey? I was saying, everybody's taken the piss out of my name my whole life. Tell me a different one. About your name? Yeah, about my name, yeah. Who are you? Corey! We've forgotten your name almost instantly, Corey. Oh, it was more interesting in your head, wasn't it? You said it out. Now we're not in a park nearer Wetherspoons, it seems a bit...
17:13If it was just you and very strong cider, this would be an excellent anecdote. There's other stuff going on. What do you do, Corey? This won't affect your benefits.
17:27Can't judge a book by its cover, You can tell the fucking price, can't you?
17:33All I know about Corey as a name is it's used to sign on once every two fucking weeks, isn't it?
17:42So you go on, what were you saying, the crazy bint? What are you saying? Listen, Jibbo, you look lovely. I've been holding you a lot of fucking days and you look lovely. You look lovely. She's been following you for 20 years. It's the best day. Okay, I'm frightened of you. Because I've seen baby reindeer.
18:14I'm gonna wake up in a fucking basement with my ankles smashed. You're lovely.
18:24Hi. Thanks for sharing. Jimmy? Yeah? Did you say masturbating 11 times in a day is too much? Do you think masturbating 11 times in a day is too much? I don't know who you're wanking off, mate.
18:43You've got to make a living, I imagine.
18:51Listen, you know, it's going to be rough in prison. God love you. What do you do, my friend? Yeah, at the moment, I'm off sick at the moment. You're what, sorry? Off sick at the moment. You're off sick? Yeah. With type 2 diabetes, I see.
19:10Four slipped discs. What are you off sick with? Four slipped discs. What, sorry? Four slipped discs. Four slipped discs. Yeah, three in the left. Four? Yeah. Four? It's like when someone's made up two excuses. You sort of go, well, fucking pick a team. So what? So that was one of the 11 cocks you were wanking off, put your back at? Yeah. Repetitive strain. God love him. So what do you normally do? I was on the railway. You were on the railway? What are you, a fucking highwayman? Say train driver, you fucking lunatic. I was on the railway.
19:56Stand and deliver. The fuck are you talking about? You were on the ground. Were you maintenance? Were you an engineer? Track maintenance, yeah. Track maintenance. It's quite a dangerous job. I think they were trying to, yeah. No, fuck it. Who cares? If you die, eh. He's already got a slip disc. Is it worth fixing it? Four slip discs. Well remembered. Four slip discs. He's in agony. He can barely move. This feels like a story in the sun. Spotted out. Be a fucking jujitsu champion. I'm saying this. What about you, mate? You've got a similar look. Like a before and after photo.
20:44Someone got a beard trimmer for Christmas. That's the only fucking difference. What's your name, champ? Darren. Darren, what do you do, mate? I work at Urethunnel. You work at what? The Eurotunnel. The Eurotunnel. Yeah. What do you work?
20:59The Eurotunnel is not the nickname you've given your vagina, is it?
21:13A lot of asylum seekers come through it.
21:19Er... It's a hell of an ordeal for them. Er... Ha-ha! Jesus, he's woken. Hey! Yes? We are a happy birthday to Seoul over here! No, fuck off!
21:38No! You're not at a work, Stu. Fucking sit down, you slag.
21:49Fucking love my job. What do you do, my friend? I teach English and philosophy. You teach English and philosophy. You don't belong here.
22:03You're better than the others. Huh? I teach English and philosophy. That sounds very good, but it could be he's thinking about reading a book. That's what that could translate to Favourite philosopher, who do you like?
22:22Socrates, wow, going fucking old school Okay, I'd go Kierkegaard But yeah, you do your thing Or Aang Rand, I quite like objectivism I must have a very early, oh thank god you're back You alright?
22:42I... I...
22:46Hang on, that's a different leg.
22:51Slipping with the other one. He's off sick.
23:01Your heart goes out to him, doesn't it? You... Oh, how is he coping? He's wasting away.
23:13We are here rather than visiting my mum in the palliative care hospice. Does that make me a bad daughter? I don't think so. Where's the person in... Where are you? Hi. Hi, how are you? You all right? It's all right? That's okay. It's hard though. It's a hard thing when someone's dying, especially if it's a long time. so what the fuck are you meant to do? You can't pre-grieve. How long's she got? We don't know. Well, fuck it, you can't put your life on hold. LAUGHTER Maybe I've got to take her back to the care home. You've got to go back to the care home? Christ, she's been left on her own. LAUGHTER
24:06You heard what? Daniel Day-Lewis writing a story. She heard Daniel Day-Lewis in? What the fuck was he doing in there? He's alright, isn't he?
24:19Christ. I tell you what, there's a lovely... I've got a friend called Carrie Adloy. Sorry, I'm giving people advice on stuff, but... You know Carrie Adloy? She's a very good sort of comedian. But she's got a podcast called Grief Cut. and it's very good, it's lots of funny people but talking about grief, I did it, but loads of people have done it. It's really interesting to kind of listen to because if you've got that in the post, it's good to kind of arm yourself. Good luck. Well, it's not a terrible thing, grief is the price you pay for love. It's fucking, it'd be sadder if you weren't fucking upset.
24:53But thanks for coming out to this. Because also, I really like money.
25:00Hi Jimmy, would you rather be cremated or buried? Ollie, the funeral guy. Hang on, we can get you a discount on mum. Where's...
25:17Where's Ollie? Ollie, where are you mate? Alright, hi fella, how are ya? We're looking for a discount here. It's not like asbestos poisoning or anything, is it? Just fucking, if it's asbestos poisoning, good luck fucking cremating that.
25:39I think we covered this earlier with my friend down here. Shark food, my friend, shark food. Feed me to the fucking animals, I don't care. Okay, Jimmy, will you sign my stuffed fish? He's called Jimmy Carp. where is this stuffed fish hi is this your vagina is it genuinely a stuffed fish yeah I'll sign it yeah why not why wouldn't I I've got a pen right here oh there's a very good Jordan Peterson thing on the daily wire where he does a is she she's ending it all is she okay talks about depression He's a very good psychiatrist, really worth having a look at. If you just Google, he's course on depression.
26:27Hey, what the fuck is this? It's a mackerel fish. Lee Mackerel. Okay, I mean, you seem like a crazy lady. What's your name? What do you do, Laura? You work as a factory.
26:51Okay. You work out, in fact, what does the factory do? You test engineering equipment. You make the stuff to test the equipment. Well, who makes the stuff to test your equipment? This is like working in a forklift delivery place.
27:12Well, who the fuck delivers that? There's a signed fish for you. Very nice to meet you. Thank you so much for coming. I really appreciate it. All right, can we come up? What else? We came to celebrate my friend Laura's heart review, but she found out today the hole's not closed, so now we're just hoping you're funny enough for us to forget life's a bitch. Where's Laura? Why are you? Laura? Where's Laura? We're looking for a lady with a hole in her heart. Hang on, hang on, I'll find her. Boo! Did we get it? Someone should have fallen over. Where's... What are you, Laura? What? Are you... Hi. So what are you...
27:56How was it meant to have closed over? I had to have something put inside it. You had to have something put inside it, and they were hoping it would close over. You may need a second opinion. These guys sound like cowboys. Yeah. Were they smoking a woodbine when they did the heart operation? Yeah, yeah, no, that'll close over on its own, love. Yeah, don't worry. Stitches? No, we don't do stitches. What the fuck are they thinking? And so have you got to go back and have another op? Hopefully not. You're just hoping it gets better on its own? You, I'll tell you what you are, qualified for sickness benefit.
28:43Got a hole in her fucking heart. Oh, my back's a bit sore. Get to work, you feckless cunt. Jesus!
28:57A lot of people that needed a laugh this evening, thank you all for coming out, I very much appreciate it. Get well soon, everyone. Good luck. Hi, my friend has just passed his oral exams to work as an engineer on a cruise ship getting oily with foreign men all day.
29:20Who's working on the cruise ships? Where are you? Hi. Congrats on the... I mean, we've made this sound like the gayest thing in the fucking world. So where's the cruise ship going? I'll be joining it in Norway, and then I'll be jumping off in Canada. Norway to Canada? I play both Norway and Canada. What, Stravanga is it? I'll be doing it. It'll probably be Stravanger. I mean, they've got a lot of deep water ports, but you'll have a fucking great time. And then Canada, presumably Toronto, but I don't fucking know. You've not bothered to fucking ask. What a magnificent fucking adventurer you are.
30:00Well, fuck it, you'll be great. Fucking what could possibly go wrong? Don't tell him about the North Sea earlier today.
30:11You can be liable. Fucking pay attention. Good luck, sailor.
30:23Full disclosure, if you mention my name when you buy gold at the Pure Gold Company, they will give me a tiny bit more gold. That's how this all works. I wouldn't lie to you, just being honest. In all seriousness, if you are looking to protect your wealth with physical gold, then I highly recommend The Pure Gold Company. Just click the link in the description or head to the pure-gold.co.jimmy to get your free copy of their investor guide. That's pure-gold.co.jimmy. Mention my name when you speak to them, and you'll get six months of secure storage for your bullion absolutely free. Yeah, I'm very good to you.
30:59I honestly think going to see live comedy is the best thing you can do with an evening. It's an excuse to see mates, have a few drinks, you'll be supporting a local theatre and you'll have a great laugh. Also, it's made me filthy rich, like really rich. So click the link below and buy tickets to come and see me live because I like being rich.
From the publisher
This heckler proves that day drinking isn't for everyone.
To see Jimmy on tour go to http://jimmycarr.com for tickets.
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Just click the link in the description to get your free copy of their investor guide.
Mention my name when you speak to them and you’ll get 6 months of secure storage for your bullion absolutely free.
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