In short
Jimmy Carr performs crowdwork in Kristiansand, Norway, focusing on heckling and audience interactions. He repeatedly tries to keep the show going while dealing with an aggressive heckler, then resumes crowdwork with other volunteers.
Guests (audience members)
Lee (a hostile, angry heckler; named “Lee” by Jimmy; escorted out by security). A man whose mother is 70 (Jimmy jokes about his divorced parents and asks about poly relationships). Aspen (another audience member; Jimmy teases his name and “baby steps”). A woman named Joanna (complains her boyfriend bought a smelly, rotten camper van; Jimmy advises scented candles/perfume). Multiple other unnamed volunteers are briefly referenced (e.g., a bachelorette party story, dating/couple anecdotes).
Key claims
Lee is “too chippy” and “killing the vibe,” so he must be removed. Jimmy says he avoids kicking people out but must protect the whole evening. He jokes about divorce “statute of limitations,” poly relationships, and “dick pics” being unflattering.
Notable examples
Lee is removed after demanding “show us your penis” and shouting insults; Jimmy later asks about divorced parents, poly dating, and taint/rim-job shock jokes; Joanna’s smelly camper van and bachelorette-cancelled wedding story.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOConfrontation with Heckler Lee
0:46 to 7:05
Jimmy Carr deals with an aggressive heckler named Lee during his set.
“See, are you here for the Magic Mike tribute?”
Discussion on Engagement and Comedy
7:06 to 9:10
Jimmy reflects on audience engagement and the nature of comedy after removing the heckler.
“Can you stop sending my girlfriend some dick pics?”
Dealing with a Heckler
14:21 to 16:48
Jimmy addresses an aggressive heckler and his approach to crowd control.
“Let's not take as long as we took with Lee.”
Cultural Observations
16:49 to 18:34
Jimmy shares his humorous take on British culture and making no effort.
“It's like exotic birds talking to each other.”
Audience Interaction
18:35 to 20:35
Jimmy interacts with a member of the audience about their family and background.
“She doesn't have to be today, that's fucking great.”
Exploring Relationships
20:36 to 23:08
A discussion about polyamorous relationships and personal dynamics.
“Oh, I feel like we're the first ones to have taken an interest.”
Bachelorette Party Story
23:09 to 26:50
A humorous exchange about a canceled wedding and a memorable bachelorette party.
“How old were you when you first jerked off?”
Bachelorette Party Story
27:27 to 28:08
A humorous exchange about a canceled wedding and a memorable bachelorette party.
“If your partner moans on at you that you never do any fun stuff anymore, then why don't you click the link below and buy a ticket to come and see me live.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:29We'll see you next time. Hello, I'm Jimmy Carr. Welcome to Crowdwork, my podcast about Crowdwork. This is me, well, losing my patience with a very aggressive heckler. I, well, I hope you will enjoy. Are you happy? Are you happy? Taxes, you cunt. Are you paying your taxes, you cunt? No, my friend, you are paying my taxes.
0:56This, uh... I mean... I have something. It's my turn now. Hang on one second. Let me just deal with this guy. I'll be back with you. What's wrong with you? Go on, Jimmy. Go on, Jimmy. Okay. You seem a little bit chippy, sir. You okay? What's wrong with you? Hang on. I'll be with you. Show us your penis, Jimmy. Show us your penis.
1:28Are you here on the wrong night, sir? See, are you here for the Magic Mike tribute? You're thinking, what the f... This is the worst thing I've ever seen! Where's his penis?
1:44Ah! What's your name, Chief? Lee. Lee. And what do you do, Lee? A lot more than me. He seems angry. You seem angry, Lee. Are you alright? I'm sorry. I'm just a wee bit touched on your fucking story. You're a wee bit touched on my story. What, go on? Fucking you go on. I think you might need to fuck off, Lee.
2:22I think.
2:28You seem a little bit aggressive, mate. What, sorry? Could be a legendary question. I think we're going to kick him out. Let's kick him out.
2:47I'll get some security up there. It's quite exciting.
2:57Hi! What, sorry? Why, my son? I imagine that someone will be coming along in a minute. It's quite exciting though, isn't it? You don't expect that in Christian's hand. We don't get many visitors.
3:14I suppose it's a bit confusing with the day and the night drinking here, because it never gets fucking... dark. It's all fucking day drinking.
3:29No, no, I'm serious. You can fuck off, Lee. Deadly fucking serious. You're way too fucking chippy.
3:40Hang on, we'll get someone to... Yeah? How is it being a legend? How is it being a legend? I will ask Lee when he's left.
4:00Where is Lee? Which one's Lee? Where am I looking? There. Hi, Lee. Lee, you've got to fuck off, mate. What, sorry? You've got to fuck off out of the show, mate. No, I'm just telling you, you've got to fuck off out of the show, mate. I have to fuck off. Yeah. You've got to fuck off, all my... You misjudged this so badly, Lee. I feel bad for you. Come back and see me another time when you've not had as much to drink. You're just being really chippy and killing the vibe. So you have to fuck off.
4:42I believe a nice young lady is going to escort you from the building now, Lee.
5:01Lee, you can leave now, or you can leave in five minutes having embarrassed yourself more.
5:09Yeah, no, you're leaving. Yeah, you're being removed by two young ladies. Be polite.
5:18Bye.
5:27Fuck off.
5:33You paid to be in a room with me, Lee. It just didn't work out for you.
5:41Thank you.
5:53This is a... don't get chippy, Lee. It's alright.
6:04Look, we've all... we've all had a couple of drinks and misjudged things before. Are you catching?
6:17Some people get how to join in and then there's that. Well, let's resume. And don't... Don't for a minute... Don't for a minute let that put you off joining in. I love it when people join in. It was just very aggressive off the fucking bat. And I've done this enough times to know when... Oh, is that his mate? Sorry, fella. Have we fucked you all night? I'm sorry, fella. All right. You're a good friend.
7:01I feel so bad for you. I'm sorry we fucked up your evening, but I wasn't going to deal with that. Good luck, man. All right, yeah. You've got to go with your mate. Yeah, I'm a good guy. I would do the same, I think. Yeah. All right. Let's get back to this. All right, take care of him. Oh, no, he was the nice one. What did you have over there, sir? Fuck him off. Fuck him off. Well, we did fuck him off, yeah. There's no getting away from that. Can you stop sending my girlfriend some dick pics? Can I stop sending your girlfriend dick pics? All pictures of you are dick pics.
7:50the thing about dick pics is they sort of don't want them
7:57let's face facts the male genitalia is it's not photogenic i mean it does a job but it's not there's no angle that that looks It either looks a bit sad or angry.
8:12I don't like it. It's pointy and it spat at me. No.
8:18Any other? What else we got? Yeah? I just want to say, I'm not the first person to put through college, but thanks to your comedy, I wrote my bachelor thesis. You wrote your bachelor thesis? Ooh. What was the... Who, what did you write the bachelor thesis on? On you, your comedy. What?
8:46Well, no offence my friend, I'm both flattered and also thinking, this sounds like a Mickey Mouse degree you've got. This is, I mean, this...
8:57It's all very well writing your thesis about me until you hit the real world, and I imagine there'll be a clash of civilizations when your CV is... I see you've written your thesis on some comedian telling jick jokes. Ah. We're looking at other candidates. Where was this? Which university? Here. There's a university here? Okay, it's all news to me.
9:29Fucking great. I'm going to Google you.
9:35How can I tell you different from a friend's village? How can I tell you different from Vrllllllquest? I thoroughly approve this message. it feels like your reach should always exceed your grasp and you've sat there and you've thought to yourself I can say ventriloquist
10:04swing and a miss I think we can agree but a bloody good go ironically you said ventriloquist like a guy trying not to move his lips
10:22Okay, weird looking inbred guy.
10:27What, I don't know his name. What am I going to call him? What you got, my friend? So, my parents are divorced. Your parents are divorced? Okay, that explains some of that. If only Dad had taken an interest. Go on, your parents are divorced? Yeah, can you tell me why? Can I tell you why? I'm going to go ahead and say your fault.
10:58So you look like a grown man. How old are you, sir? I'm 30. You're 30. Okay, the statute of limitations on complaining about your parents' divorce ends at 21. You're out the other side now, my friend.
11:24I don't know why his parents broke up. I presume disappointment.
11:32Who knew this gig would be so much fun? Ha! Meghan Markle is, of course, a lifelong feminist, which she's demonstrated by marrying a prince. Tuck ball! What, sorry? You heard me. Fuck off. What, do you like Meghan Markle? No. You don't? I don't. Are you saying fuck off to Meghan Markle? Yes. She's not here.
12:04Sorry if that spoilt things for you. What, sorry? You heard me. I heard you. Yes. You shouted it. You've got to be super careful shouting fuck off. Squeaky. Yeah. What's he? What? Who's not here? Your dad. My dad's not here. No. The fuck are you talking about?
12:43What's your name, my friend? Aspen. I'm going to guess that's a name, is it? And is he saying it right? Well, that's great. Baby steps for you. Now, there's two ways you can learn things. You can learn them from personal experience, or you can learn from example.
13:18How do you see the rest of your evening panning out? A good one. What, sorry? A good one. Okay. We've got you at a ten. We need you at a seven. A little sprinkle of shut the fuck up, yeah?
Read the full transcript
13:37Jesus. They're all in. So, um, hmm. I'm not going to talk about the whole trans women in sport thing because, frankly, I don't know enough about the science. What? Roll out! Pros, find the right flooring for the job in Lowe's newly redesigned flooring showroom. Shop our expanded assortment of trusted brands and get up to 35 % off style selections. Stainmaster and Stainmaster Pet Protect special order carpet. And while you're here, Save$100 on a DeWalt 20V Max 6Ah 2-pack of batteries. Now just$179. Get more of what you need faster, and save more where it counts, from the ground up. Our best lineup is here at Lowe's.
14:17Battle 3.826, while supplies last. Selection barriers by location. Clear. Okay, you're gone. Up the lights. No, no problem. Put up the lights for a sec. There's the guy. Let's not take as long as we took with Lee. Just up and out. Sam, spin. Up and out. Just get up and get out, man. Get up and get out. Super quick. Super quick.
14:48Sorry, man. You've just had too much to drink. It's fine. Don't worry. It's okay. You just get up and go. You don't need to say anything. You're good. Don't worry. You've just had too much to drink. It's fine. Don't feel embarrassed. It's okay. Go and have a pint. You'll be fine. Can we have a quick round of applause for our security this evening, who are doing sterling work? Thank you.
15:19Sorry about that, people that were disturbed. I think we gave him enough goes, though. I'm always like, I'm very reticent to spoil... I mean, I could spot that straight away, but I'm very reticent to kick anyone out. because imagine what it's like being me, right? People have bought tickets to come and see you live. It means the world. I'm literally, I've got my dream job. It's all I've ever wanted to do, and you guys come out and see me live. So I never want to kick any individual out, but my service has to be to the whole evening.
15:53It's not like I, you know...
16:01Who's next? Alright, let's get back to this. Yeah? What's my personal best? How many? No, it's like two or three. People normally get the message after one. Normally, if someone's a horrific cunt, people go, alright, yeah, I see what happens here. But strangely, no. Depends how good the security are.
16:34And we're all being very nice in here, those guys are both dead in a ditch now.
16:45What, that's an expression. I'll tell you some dating stories, make you feel better. Are you alright?
16:57Fucking treat yourself. Have a nice night out. Oh, my God. Ooh.
17:20It's like exotic birds talking to each other.
17:30I feel like David Attenborough.
17:36Join us as we watch the... lesser-spotted Norwegian... its mating crime.
17:51Like a retarded cuckoo.
17:59What the fuck is going on? Do you know any Norwegian? Do I know any Norwegian? Uh, no. None at all. Literally fucking none. I've made no effort. And actually, before you say anything, before you think, well, that's, I mean, he tours a lot here, he should make an effort. It's actually part of my culture, I'm British, is not to make any fucking effort at all. It's actually quite important to us.
18:33The only concession I'm willing to make is to speak English louder.
18:42My mum is 70. Your mum is what? 70. Your mum's 70? What, today? Hi! This... this... She doesn't have to be today, that's fucking great. Nice to have you here. Hello. You've raised a nice boy there, haven't you? Brought you out to a show on a Saturday night and made her fussier. I remember you. Son!
19:17That's right, I'm a motherfucker.
19:22Mr. Sam, I need to hear you. Hang on, I'll chat to this guy first and then we'll get to you. Go on. Is my mum? Yeah, yeah, your mum. Go on. Can I make a good joke without making her a slag? Can I make a good joke without making her a slag? I base a lot of my comedy in fact, so it's...
19:45Super difficult for me to...
19:53No, she's, I mean, I try and do better, but I mean, let's face it, your mum, your mum is something of a gilf. It's like a milf, but.
20:06If that's the best you've got, then I'm not good enough for your mum. Well, that's the fucking attitude I want to hear. What a good boy.
20:20What a nice man. I want to know about his divorced parents. You want to know about his divorced parents? Okay. I'll ask him. You all right, sir? Why did they break up?
20:44Oh. Oh, I feel like we're the first ones to have taken an interest. Thank God you asked.
20:52You all right, big fella? I think interest... Oh, he's actually answering. Okay, well... I don't think you need to really answer. I'll assume there was a huge custody battle. Neither of them wanted you.
21:18Oh! Such a dick. What's your take on poly relationship? What's my take on... Poly relationship. Like two boyfriend, girlfriend. Oh, poly relationships? Yeah, give it a go. I mean, give it a go. Let's see if that works out. The whole of human culture is sort of designed to pair bond, but you fucking go your own way. Good luck to you.
21:46You don't look like a guy that could get one girl. So... It feels like this is an academic inquiry.
22:00He's the one that has to share. Maybe, I'll ask. Are you the one that has to share?
22:10It's alright. Sometimes it might be a very comfy cup chair.
22:21It's a very fun gig.
22:26Yeah. Do I have any stories about the place between your balls and the arse crack? Do I have any stories about the place between my balls and the arse crack? The taint, I believe we're calling it. Because it taints your balls and it taints your ass. Um, yes, once upon a time...
22:52in Norway... there was a repressed homosexual man... who dreamt of one day... giving a comedian a rim job. What the fuck are you talking about? Who has stories? What the fuck are you talking about?
23:17Crazy! How old were you when you first jerked off? What's that? How old were you when you first jerked off? How old was I when I first jerked off? Myself or a priest? It's two different numbers. Ah, this is boring. I want to watch cartoons.
23:41This time last year, I had my bachelorette party and today I'm here with a man who is the reason why I cancel the wedding. This is good. Where are you? Where am I looking? Here. Hi. This sounds like a story. So where was the bachelorette party? Oh, it was here in this town. It was here and you met him on a night out? I met him a couple of weeks later. You met him a couple of weeks later and then you cancel the wedding? Yeah, like two weeks before the wedding. Two weeks before the wedding, you cancel the wedding. Sir? Yes. Nothing but respect for you. That might be a magic dick. She just went, it is.
24:36Fucking great. That's a very brave thing to do, I think, to cancel it. Two weeks before that, that takes a lot, I think. but you made the right choice, right? You solved for happiness and you got it. Oh. You're so sweet. This is lovely. Great, good. My boyfriend just bought a smelly and rotten camper van. I fucking hate it. How do I support him?
25:04Where's the... Hi.
25:10You bought a smelly, rotten camper van. It's not so rotten. It's not so rotten. It is smelly, though.
25:19And why do you hate it, madam? It's nice, isn't it? No. You don't like it? You don't like camping? Yes, but not in the camper van. You don't like camping in the camper van? Not a smelly one. Not a smelly one. Okay. Well, buy a fucking scented candle, you dizzy bitch. What the fuck? Jesus.
25:47He's bought a camper van. You could fucking buy a Jostick. Some incense. Fucking something.
25:58I don't fucking know. Maybe wear some fucking perfume.
26:04What's your name, madam? Joanna. Hi, Joanna, how are you? How long have you guys been together? One and a half years. One and a half years? And you don't mind about the almost-moustache? No, it's a guy who's trying to grow a moustache. It's best you hear it from me, sir. Stop it. She doesn't like smelly, dirty things.
26:34When my grandmother was a young girl, She could have a weekend up in London, visit the theatre and have a three-course meal at the Savoy for less than a pound. In fairness, she do always put out. Reading between the lines, I think she might have been working as a prostitute. Anyway, I'm getting off message. If, like me, you buy gold at the Pure Gold Company, you can decrease the risk of your savings shrinking into oblivion by owning an asset that historically has increased in value. In all seriousness, if you are looking to protect your wealth with physical gold, then I highly recommend The Pure Gold Company.
27:07Just click the link in the description or head to the pure-gold.co.com to get your free copy of their investor guide. That's pure-gold.co.com. Mention my name when you speak to them and you'll get six months of secure storage for your bullion absolutely free. I'm very good to you. Well, I hope you enjoyed that clip. If your partner moans on at you that you never do any fun stuff anymore, then why don't you click the link below and buy a ticket to come and see me live. Not only will you have a laugh, but also that's two hours that they can't be moaning on at you. Because if they talk, I will destroy them.
27:43Close your eyes, exhale, feel your body relax, and let go of whatever you're carrying today. Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-CONTACTS. Oh my gosh, they're so fast. And breathe. Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order. Oh, sorry. Namaste. Visit 1-800-CONTACTS.com today to save on your first order. 1-800-CONTACTS.
From the publisher
Jimmy Carr deals with an increasingly aggressive audience member whose attempts to join in quickly derail the room. As the situation escalates, Jimmy draws a very clear line.
To see Jimmy on tour go to http://jimmycarr.com for tickets.
If you are looking to protect your wealth with physical gold, then I highly recommend The Pure Gold Company:
https://pure-gold.co/jimmy
Just click the link in the description to get your free copy of their investor guide.
Mention my name when you speak to them and you’ll get 6 months of secure storage for your bullion absolutely free.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
