"The State of Free Speech In The UK?!" - Jimmy Responds to American Heckler - Minneapolis, Minnesota

12:21What's your name? Dead parents. Dead parents? You look as if you may have killed them. Did they pass away recently? No. No. A long time ago. Were you orphaned as a young man? No, just my dad died. Just your dad died. Well, I'm sorry to hear that, my friend. Although, a friend said this to me recently. I've got a friend called Eric Weinstein. He's maybe the brightest guy I know. Fuck, he's a physicist. He's very bright. And I was talking about how much I like being a parent. And he said this just over lunch. He just sort of grabbed my arm and he went, you will die and you will be reborn as someone else and you will love them

13:05and I suddenly got reincarnation I suddenly got the whole fucking thing so yeah your dad's dead but you're here that's it

13:21You're now carrying that torch. You need to now just put a baby in someone and it fucking goes on.

13:31Perfect. Hang on, hang on. I'm going to find out what his dad died of. We'll do a joke.

13:41He died of alcoholism on Father's Day. He died of alcoholism on Father's Day. Wow. Let's all raise a glass. Wow. That is... that's... Fucking hell. It's hard not to blame you a little bit.

14:14Daddy, I got you a bottle of your favourite. Glug, glug, glug, out. Fuck, and are you straight-edge? Do you drink a tour yourself? Five years sober. Five years sober? Fucking love it, man. That's great. That's really great. Now, are you in the programme or... You're not in the programme, just fucking... Straight-edge is what the punk rock guys used to call it. instead of like T-Total, which sounds a bit European and faggy. I'm T-Total. Straight edge sounds punk rock. I'd really recommend this. A brilliant book I got recommended years ago called This Naked Mind. Have you ever heard of it? It's a guy called John Sarno, who's a back surgeon, and he wrote The Mind-Body Connection and Healing Back Pain.

15:03Very good books if you've got back pain. But the same technology as that. It's called This Naked Mind. It's a brilliant read. It takes about two weeks to read it. But it's a great sort of thing, like, you know, because it's every day. You've got to remind yourself of why you're not, but taking control of that. That's fucking magnificent, man. Well done, you. Great.

15:27If you could take a photo of any point in time, what would it be a photo of and why?

15:37That's a very fucking good question. Who's asking? Have you... Have you got an answer to this pre-packaged? I change it every time. Go on, what would you go for? What's your thing? I'd like to see when I was born. You'd like to see when you were born?

15:59Yeah, I think we'd all secretly like to get a glimpse of our mother's gaping vagina.

16:09possibly the worst answer you could have given sir

16:15other than your conception i can't think of a less

16:26i thought you were going to go with dinosaurs from athletic stuff like a full court pickup game swish to athletic-ish stuff, like a half-mile stroll. Get those steps in. Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. The crucifixion. Hitler fucking shooting himself something fun.

16:59This fucking idiot it just wants to see a massive fanny.

17:11I think I would, at any point of time, I know this is tricksy, but I would go back, people are obsessed by the Big Bang, right? Everyone's obsessed by the Big Bang, and I would like to go back 30 seconds before the Big Bang and get a photo of that.

17:31What? Because it's interesting, right? It'd be an interesting thing to, like, I don't have religion, but... What's God anyway? My favourite quote about God is from ACDC's Rhodey. Genuinely true. ACDC's Rhodey says, God is the name we give the blanket, we throw over the mystery to give it shape.

17:53Yeah. And fucking ACDC's Rhodey. Cool. Yeah, just prior to the big brang. Let's fucking get a picture of that. I mean, obviously, I'm not sure what you could do to protect the film, but... Tinfoil? What, sorry? Adoption. I'm all for it. Fucking great. Are you... Are you adopted, or are you... You're adopted. Who the fuck would give you away, you gorgeous creature? And have you traced the birth parents, or can you not be arsed with that? No, fuck them Fuck them, they missed out, look at you And what did the people that adopted you What do they do? Played for the White Sox and she was in the Olympics So you were adopted by someone that played for the White Sox And your mum was in the Olympics You hit the fucking jackpot Didn't you?

18:55I would suggest, sir and this is not the motivation people normally have, but I would trace your birth parents and I would explain to them what you've just told me and then just add, so fuck you.

19:16You got a fucking upgrade. Yeah. Adopt it. I mean, used.

19:27You don't like to say second hand. But I think pre-loved is a stretch, because they gave you away.

19:38And have you had kids, sir? You have. And what have you got? What are you rocking? A girl and a boy. A girl and a boy? Fucking brilliant. Another three? You could have one of each.

19:53What? I've only just discovered you've got to have a flame dame now. to complete the set what's we know it's just the trousers are cut tight

20:12rednecks

20:17what's right they're Trump voters well I mean it's it's half the population your Your democracy is on a fucking knife edge in America, isn't it? It's 49-51. People could talk about landslides, but it's, you know, what we need in this country, I feel, is less debate and more deliberation. Well, debates are for winning, right? People win debates against other people, and you hear about people owning other people online. It gets you fucking nowhere. What we need is more deliberation. Agree what the problem is and try and find common ground.

21:00Yeah, I just fucking won that debate.

21:07What was that? Me for president? Yeah, I've hosted a few TV shows. Qualified as anyone.

21:18Welcome to Minnesota, Jimmy. do you have any good jokes that would get you arrested at Heathrow? Yeah. Who's asking? Where's Graham Lindenham? Graham Lindenham. I fucking love Graham. Because whether you agree with Graham or J.K. Rowling or not, you have to admit, the thing that's in short supply in our society is bravery. And he's a fucking brave guy. it's easy now to say yeah men are men and women are women and then there's a very tiny percentage of people that want to live different lives let them do their own thing but at the time when he started saying it it was fucking incredible that he was saying it and he gave up everything he lost his family he lost his career he lost everything and then he's getting fucking arrested at the airport fucking madness you got the first amendment fucking cherish it

22:16What is more worrying? Not having a license to tell a joke in the UK, or fear of being assassinated for telling one in the US. James, British expat living in Minnesota. I would go, yeah, I wouldn't worry too much. I wouldn't worry too much. Do you want my hot take on America? Even as divided as you feel you are, objectively, the best country in the world. subjectively the worst

22:47you think you're having a fucking terrible time and you've never been more divided and you don't agree with the other side and all I would say is as an observer to your fine nation 85 % of you agree about 85 % of fucking everything you're going to be fine don't fucking worry about it

23:12It's good, isn't it?

23:18I'm not allowed to visit school.

23:29Hang on, what was that first one, madam? Prairie dogs. There's some good-looking women in here.

23:43Don't put yourself down. They've got dinner switches now, you'll be fine. I don't know what a prairie dog is.

23:56Anyone? It's like a what? A gopher. It's like a gopher. Okay, I don't know what a gopher is. I'm not from round here. It's an ugly badger. An ugly badger? Well.

24:17It's a rodent that lives underground.

24:25What? I didn't know what one was and it would appear you don't fucking know either, so I don't feel bad now. There's a lot of fucking discussion as to what they're not mystical fucking beasts It's definitely a real thing isn't it but but somehow no one can nail down exactly what this is Ah the prairie dogs

24:54It's a turd you can't hold in

25:06Thank you. Strangely poetic.

25:14Yeah, maybe you guys eat too much cheese around here. That's what it is. The Riyadh Comedy Festival. It's fucking amazing. I was there on Monday. I got to do a... I co-headlined with Louis C.K. Which was fucking great. I loved it. What have you got strong opinions? I liked it. Do you know what I liked about Riyadh? I like the direction of travel. I like what they're trying to be. They want a little bit of our culture. Fine. It's good, right? I think there's two kinds of people. There's people that want to have a conversation, and people that don't want to have a conversation. I want to have a fucking conversation.

26:01It was amazing. It was an extraordinary thing. Because obviously I thought it was going to be some expats, the people that work over there or whatever from Europe or America. No, it was all locals, 8 ,000 people in the room, about 3 ,000 of them women, and laughing at fucking the horrific jokes that me and Louis do. Fucking yes, that's progress. I mean, if you like our stuff. You don't like our stuff, they've gone the wrong way. How many cats do you have? How many cats do I have? Two. What's your name? Ten. It's an eight out of ten joke, is it? Right. I don't know. What's your name, madam? I'm sure we can find something funny.

26:47What?

26:51What's your name? Leslie. Leslie. And what do you do, Leslie? This is Natalie. What's your name? Natalie. Natalie Leslie does Natalie

27:07and that what you're Natalie are you gone Natalie what do you do come on you know this what do you do I have two kids I don't know anymore well you should get to know them you should

27:30Ask them questions, Natalie. Fucking take an interest, you dizzy bitch.

27:40So you're a homemaker, you're having kids? Yeah, that's enough. That'll do. I think it's a weird thing that women sometimes do, not to fucking mansplain feminism to anyone, but if you've got two kids, that's a fucking full-time job. There's no and. Fucking do your thing. If you've got one kid, get a fucking part-time job, you lazy bitch.

28:07If you've got three, give one away. Two's perfect.

28:14What do I think about Kill Tony? I think I'm very funny on it.

28:21I fucking love it. Yeah, I love that show. Again, it's another thing where Tony Hinchcliffe, who I've known for fucking 15 years, is helping all of these people fucking make it in comedy. It's fucking brilliant. What do you think about the state of free speech in the UK? Any way to make that into a funny joke? Well, who's asking? Hi. I would love to comment about free speech in the UK. But I can't.

28:58We don't have a First Amendment, so you could be locked up there for fucking tweeting something mean because the world's gone fucking mad. We'll be all right. I think, I don't know, I think, in all seriousness, I think it's a bit, Robert Frost, I think, said it. Civilization is a clearing in the forest, and we have to constantly fight to hold on to it.

29:31We should have written a fucking constitution. I can't believe we forgot. What else have we got? What is your opinion on ICE? I view it as entirely unnecessary. This is, again, whatever your political opinions are, go with God. But life is about incentives. Human beings are all about incentives. If you take incentives away, you know, put down sugar, you'll get ants, right? So if you change the employment law in America just a little bit and big companies got fined huge amounts of money for employing people that couldn't legally be here You take away the incentive and you wouldn't need to be kicking anyone's fucking door in

30:17Hey Jimmy, thanks for coming to Minnesota. How has therapy influenced your approach to comedy if at all? who's asking? There's a question there. Hi. Like, a lot. A lot. I did quite a lot of NLP, which has got a bad reputation, neurolinguistic programming, but I did a lot of that in my sort of mid-20s, and I gave up my job when I started being a comedian. I think the thing about therapy, in all seriousness, is if you've tried it and you didn't like it, go and try a different type. Therapy's a bit like food, right? But it's like you've gone to one restaurant, and they go, yeah, we do Chinese food.

30:54and you go, this isn't for me. There's fucking Italian and there's Indian. There's all these different types of therapy. And you would imagine it's all just sitting on a couch and talking about what your mum did. And there's some, I would say, cognitive behavioural therapy changed my life. It's a wonderful thing. CBT, even just Googling it online, cognitive behavioural therapy, and looking at the different modes of thought, even that alone helps tremendously. So it changed my life. It's a wonderful thing. I would recommend it to anyone.

31:31And also, you know, sometimes it's nice to get just a massage.

31:41From that kind of physical therapy. I suppose if I had a preference on that, it would be probably from a young, curious lesbian.

32:00Literally looked fucking terrified. What? Hang on. Hang on a second. I'll never make it out alive. When my grandmother was a young girl, she could have a weekend up in London, visit the theatre and have a three-course meal at the Savoy for less than a pound. In fairness, she did always put out. Reading between the lines, I think she might have been working as a prostitute. Anyway, I'm getting off message. If, like me, you buy gold at the Pure Gold Company, you can decrease the risk of your savings shrinking into oblivion by owning an asset that historically has increased in value. In all seriousness, if you are looking to protect your wealth with physical gold, then I highly recommend the Pure Gold Company.

32:40Just click the link in the description or head to the pure-gold.co slash jimmy to get your free copy of their investor guide. That's pure-gold.co slash jimmy. Mention my name when you speak to them and you'll get six months of secure storage for your bullion absolutely free Yeah, I'm very good to you. Well, I hope you enjoyed that clip If your partner moans on at you that you never do any fun stuff anymore Then why don't you click the link below and buy a ticket to come and see me live? Not only will you have a laugh, but also that's two hours that they can't be moaning on at you because if they talk I will destroy them I see you Avatar Fire and Ash is now streaming on Disney+.

33:21It's the film critics are calling the best Avatar yet. A true epic and completely jaw-dropping. This is the only purest thing in this world. Return to Pandora on Disney+. It will be an adventure for the whole family. And watch the Oscar-winning phenomenon at home. This is sick! Avatar Fire and Ash, now streaming on Disney+. Rated PG-13.