Why Jimmy ALWAYS Wears a Suit - San Francisco, California

0:00Hello, I'm Jimmy Carr and this is Crowdwork, a podcast where I do crowdwork. This time you find me in San Francisco wearing a suit, as always, and I'll tell you why. I went to you exactly 15 years ago at the Olympia in Dublin, Ireland, as part of your Rapier Wit tour. After the show, you did a meet and greet behind the bar. I met you and you offered to sign something for me. I opened my bag and the only thing in there was my passport. You proceeded to sign my passport and handed it back to me. to my surprise, inside the passport, you wrote, Katie is a drug dealer. And while handing it back, you said, good luck leaving the country with that love.

0:3715 years later, I've just left the country, and I'm here to see you again today.

0:49Where's Katie? Hi, Katie. Great to have you here.

0:58What are you doing over here, Katie? I came over from work about 12 years ago. About 12 years ago? And what... Did you meet a fella? Several. Several.

1:12She can't go back because of the shame. She'd be in a laundry working. You're standing up to talk to me like... like you're about to do the river dance or something. It's cute. You're adorable. Thanks for coming, Katie. I appreciate it. Thanks, yeah. Once every 15 years, you keep it regular. All right, what else we got? Prop 15. What, sorry? I've no idea. Prop... Zero, what does that mean? Okay, Prop 50. What is it? What's it? Why would I know? I don't know, but it's a what's it? Anti-rigging the election. Well, I'm not sure that's going to work. How do we know who's going to fucking win? What are we going to do?

2:11Just count them up? What is it? The 1880s? Grow up. Circumcised. Am I circumcised? No. No, why would I be so... I mean, a European male.

2:29Well,

2:34now we have a finale to the show.

2:41If you could make everyone in the world understand one thing, what would it be? Ooh. that's a fucking who's asking that? that's a very deep question

3:05I think it would just be I think it would just be critical thinking, right? that's it that's, you know people are overly impressed with the AI machines, but AI is very left-brained, and we live in a very left-brained world, right? And the left brain is very good at doing complicated things, and complicated things, like going to the moon, sound impressive, but are they? It's just one thing after another. The right brain is what humanity does brilliantly. The only thing we do better than doing things logically and in order and making lists is the gestalt, the whole. Art and music and comedy and laughter and love and joy, sports all the things we really fucking care about AI can never fucking go near we're very special

4:01that or like proper fingering

4:09two in the pink, one in the stink that's how that's done, yeah it's very light and shade my show three

4:21dream force is it what is it it's a it's a sales conference yeah

4:34well how long is the conference what is it three days long it's a week long okay all right well i'll quickly for anyone that's not the dream force conference, I'll sum up what they're saying. I know fuck all about it, but like every sales conference there's ever been, they're going to be saying, we had a great year last year. Next year, we're going to smash that. That's it. Ladies and gentlemen, Metallica.

5:02The government shutdown? Well, I think it might be permanent.

5:11This again, the government shutdown is like, yeah, within reason. Like, people think, oh, my God, the government's been shut down for four weeks. Go to Italy. They've done fuck all in 20 years.

5:27They're having an Aperol spritz on a balcony. Don't fucking worry about it. Am I a what? I think you probably should have gone with puppet. I don't want to critique your heckling style, but Marionette was a weird reach.

5:50Yeah, we get it, you're gay, but Marionette.

6:00Star Wars or Trekkies? I hope Star Wars Boo Do you like Star Trek? Well alright That's fine Hang on How old are you my friend? No but go on 46 Look at the fucking mileage on it Jesus Bit of good news Star Wars and Star Trek wise You can watch both

6:35it's like being bisexual fucking have it he's not well done this guy fucking knows

6:46am i bisexual in your dreams

6:56san francisco stop trying to fucking turn me jesus i I regard you as the greatest comedian of this generation, yet after hearing your podcast conversations, I've come to see a deeper layer, that of a true philosopher. Your insights have guided me through difficult periods. I hope one day I can share the stage with you. Any advice for a comedian trying to find their voice? Where are you? Where's this fellow traveller? Where are you? Oh, hey there, how are you? What's your name? What's your name? Arkit. Arkit, come say hi. Come say hi, man. It's very nice to meet you. How long? You want to get a photo?

7:38Yeah, let's get a photo. Hi, it's good to see you. Where are you from, man? India. India, which bit of India? Hyderabad. Hyderabad, yeah, I played Hyderabad last year. I did gigs there. It was fucking incredible, man. Incredible. I love my Indian guys.

7:58I mean, look, I'll just take two seconds, right? So comedy is self-assignment. Life is self-assignment, right? So that thing of going, you have to write every day. People focus on performance. Performance is like, it's nice, it's fun, and you'll get better at it as you do more, but writing is everything. Just write jokes every day. And everything that isn't doing that isn't doing the thing. The life that you want is on the other side of the work you're avoiding. Good luck, brother.

8:35That's not my standard advice to new comics. Like, if I meet one backstage in a club, it's, suck this, we'll see how you do. I thought that would be inappropriate this evening. Very best of luck, my friend. What inspired your awesome wardrobe? I'm always impressed on how snappy you look. Who's asking? Where's the... Oh, hey, man, how are you? One of my best friends is my tailor, a guy called Luke Sweeney. So he makes all my clothes. And basically, I said to him about a year ago, I said, I'd like to look as if I'm about to rob a train in the 1930s.

9:11I think mission accomplished, right?

9:17It's, yeah, it's weird. I kind of think it's a weird thing with, like, just how men dress in America. I think you've over-solved for comfort.

9:27I'm never comfortable. And I'm fine with that. What was your name? Chris, what do you do, Chris? You're a building contractor. Well, you've got a proper job, like a man. Fair enough, you're allowed to wear denim. What was that? You're a marionette! He's back. Wait a second.

9:58As you said that, I was doing that with my hands.

10:04I am... I am NOT a marionette. I just like to walk like this sometimes. The best day of my life was the birth of my first child. And that's because that was the day someone told me you don't pay capital gains tax on selling gold coins. That's why I partnered up with a pure gold company. I buy gold with them as a store of wealth and to protect against inflation. And, well, you can do that too. This is an advert. I'm suggesting you do that. But I'm not a financial advisor. Don't take my advice. Go and, you know, seek a professional financial advisor and then do what I tell you. Go and buy gold at the pure gold company.

10:44They'll tell you it's a good idea. I am not a grifter. I wouldn't sell you something that I don't use myself. So I use the pure gold company. If you'd like to invest in physical gold as well, just click the link in the description or head to the pure-gold.co slash jimmy to get your free copy of their investor guide. That's pure-gold.co slash jimmy. Mention my name when you speak to them and you'll get six months of storage secure for your bullion absolutely free. My God, I'm good to you. I hope you enjoy the clip. I just want to say this. The best presents are never things, they're experiences.

11:18So if you're having difficulty in your relationship, if the passion is fading, then don't get her flowers or chocolates or jewellery. Buy her tickets, take her out, come and see me live. Give her the best gift you can give anyone. No not the gift of laughter. A night with a real man. Click below for tickets. You cuck.