In short
Mike Epps and Fat Joe trade childhood and career stories—growing up under strict parenting, neighborhood food stops, fashion pressure, street power dynamics, comedy’s darkness, and wild celebrity/industry anecdotes. They also discuss comedy influences, “biters” stealing jokes, and Epps’s current projects and touring.
Guest backgrounds
- Mike Epps: Stand-up comedian and actor; has worked with major music artists (Jay-Z, Nas, Eminem, Jadakiss, etc.) and appears in TV/film; leads/hosts comedy projects and tours.
- Fat Joe (Coke of the Dawn/Joe and Jada Show host): Rapper and music industry figure; references clubs, New York scenes, and collaborations.
Key claims
- Fashion pressure and “being fly” were survival-like in their youth; money constraints create resentment and violence.
- Drug-dealer “kissing ass” and street hypocrisy: people treat kingpins differently when they fall.
- Comedy is a “dark” solo art form; it can contribute to mental health struggles and suicide.
- Joke theft (“biters”) is common; big names stealing often trace back to smaller creators.
Notable examples
- Mike’s father’s “dictator” rules (whistling to call kids in), and a prank overdose to get Jordan shoes; EMS gives charcoal.
- Ernie’s bodega sausages/cheese sandwiches as a childhood delicacy despite being unsanitary.
- A club shooting incident tied to a payment dispute during a Fat Joe show; the club later shut down.
- Epps’s “Comedy Mount Rushmore” debate: Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Martin Lawrence, Bernie Mac, Robin Harris; Dave Chappelle as a “next tier” exception.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOMike Epps Joins the Conversation
3:16 to 5:39
Mike Epps discusses his life and career with Joe and Jada.
“The only person that phone can ring on the couch, and we don't get mad at him.”
Nostalgic Childhood Memories
5:39 to 6:18
The hosts share humorous stories about their childhood experiences.
“You pull out of old school, you pull out of new school.”
Growing Up and Family Dynamics
6:18 to 7:25
Discussion about family expectations and upbringing.
“Somebody tell you that your mom is called.”
Food and Neighborhood Memories
7:25 to 8:02
The hosts reminisce about local food spots and their significance.
“white people clean you missed the homie I'm missing it don't warm it up you better not dirt warm it up I don't want to have no looming or forest I don't want to have an refrigerator door with none of that shit.”
Supermarket Adventures
8:02 to 8:43
The guys talk about their experiences at the supermarket as kids.
“If you could say one, what's the main store or a bodega in your neighborhood that you would honestly say fucked you up?”
Pressure of Fashion and Style
8:43 to 9:29
Discussion about the pressures of being stylish growing up.
“The man's probably going to be watching this and they raise up like this.”
Navigating Social Status
9:29 to 14:00
The hosts discuss social dynamics related to wealth and appearance.
“the supermarket with my mother with two dollars and they get the rice the chicken, a pack of cigarettes and bread and the milk for$2.”
The Pressure of Being 'Fly' Growing Up
14:00 to 16:58
Mike discusses the societal pressures related to fashion and status during his youth.
“red one and a blue one by the middle of the year.”
Lessons from His Brother's Experience
16:58 to 17:59
Reflecting on his brother's rise and fall, Mike shares valuable life lessons learned.
“He bought their whole crib, like gave it to them.”
Nostalgia for Comedy Roots and the Bronx
17:59 to 19:16
Mike reminisces about his early comedy days and experiences in the Bronx.
“all the way up on the highway that motherfucker follow you all the way back my brother what's it like for you yes sir being a comedian shout out to Country Kitchen Country Kitchen How's that food?”
Show all 39 chapters
Interactions with Comedy Legends and Icons
19:16 to 22:05
Mike reflects on encounters with notable figures in the comedy scene.
“I said, I ain't about to walk up to him and say nothing to him.”
J-Lo's Generosity in the Spotlight
22:05 to 23:28
Mike recounts a memorable experience working with J-Lo, highlighting her generosity.
“I think J-Lo probably the richest person I worked with.”
Reflections on the Pimp Game
23:28 to 26:56
A candid discussion about the realities of the pimp lifestyle, both past and present.
“That shit, that Hunts Point, one way in, one way out.”
The Dark Side of Comedy
26:56 to 32:20
Exploring the challenges and dark realities faced by comedians in their careers.
“Yeah, because you know what they was doing to them girls?”
A Close Call at Fat Joe's Show
32:20 to 40:00
Mike Epps shares a harrowing experience from a club incident involving gunfire.
“You can bet NBA games any night on the app.”
Mike Epps Reflects on His Father's Influence
42:00 to 43:40
Epps shares personal stories about his father and the impact of fatherhood on mental health.
“Man, my dad used to pick me and my brother up.”
The Resilience of Strong Individuals
43:40 to 44:40
Epps discusses the strength and resilience found in people who have faced adversity and loss.
“But my wife is so powerful and resilient.”
Upcoming Projects and Collaborations
44:40 to 46:10
Epps talks about his new TV show with Kenya Barris and his upcoming Netflix series.
“The last season of The Upshaws, me and Wanda Sykes on Netflix.”
The Struggles of Comedians
46:10 to 48:00
The hosts discuss the realities of being a comedian, including financial struggles and the lack of a middle class.
“when I was dating girls, they was like, you got to take that shit off.”
Mike Epps' Journey to New York
48:00 to 50:00
Epps recounts his journey to New York and the challenges he faced as an aspiring comedian.
“And a nigga from Stanky Hall, Texas, cut your head off, bro.”
Encountering the Hip Hop Scene
50:00 to 51:20
Epps shares stories of his interactions with the hip hop scene and notable figures like Jay-Z.
“Oh, see, I wouldn't have came over there.”
The Legacy of Tim Dogg in Hip Hop
51:20 to 53:20
A discussion on Tim Dogg's impact on hip hop and the origins of the East Coast-West Coast rivalry.
“How about none of us in the Bronx know nothing about Tim Dogg.”
A Wild Encounter on Fordham Road
53:20 to 56:00
A humorous recount of a bizarre incident involving a naked man on Fordham Road.
“That nigga was eating in White Castle, man.”
Naked Encounter in the Neighborhood
56:00 to 56:50
Mike shares a wild story about a naked man causing chaos in the neighborhood.
“Like, yo, when I say the ladies walked by and was like, boom.”
Hip Hop Museum Plans
56:50 to 57:52
Discussion about the new hip hop museum opening in the Bronx and the importance of hip hop culture.
Respecting the Journey of Artists
57:52 to 59:06
Reflection on the struggles and successes of Fat Joe and Jadakiss in the music industry.
“But you know, it's people, the older people down in Florida, they don't even know you rap.”
Humble Beginnings and Parenting
59:06 to 1:01:19
Mike and Joe discuss their humble beginnings and the challenges of parenting affluent children.
“I say that nigga deserve that shit cause I seen that nigga poor you see me with the herringbone chain You didn't have nothing.”
Podcasting in the Modern Age
1:01:40 to 1:04:40
Mike and Joe talk about their experiences with podcasting and the evolving landscape of media.
“It's third year and there's more to come.”
Hip Hop Dynamics and Realness
1:04:40 to 1:10:00
In-depth discussion on the dynamics of the hip hop industry and authenticity.
“They can't believe the shit that's going on.”
Imaginary Rap Beef and Hip-Hop Legends
1:10:00 to 1:11:00
Exploring the humorous side of rap rivalries and legendary figures in hip-hop.
“We have rap beef with guys who ain't even here.”
DMX Stories and Spellbound
1:11:00 to 1:12:10
Sharing personal anecdotes about DMX, including a fascinating story about Spellbound.
“That's why I won't get at me, doggy, say, tell that nigga K Solo.”
The Duality of DMX
1:12:10 to 1:13:30
Recounting the contrasting sides of DMX's personality and interactions with others.
“DMX and Big Pun had a show in like a baby arena in Brooklyn.”
Street Tales and Shootouts
1:13:30 to 1:15:20
Vivid storytelling about street experiences, including intense encounters and shootouts.
“He said, I said, I'm going to bring you up.”
Karate and Street Credibility
1:15:20 to 1:17:30
Discussing the effectiveness of karate in real-life situations and humorous stories about it.
“I seen niggas shoot at a nigga one time, one shotgun, two fucking nines, four fives.”
The Influence of the Nation of Islam
1:17:30 to 1:19:20
Exploring the positive impact of the Nation of Islam in community dynamics.
“I've never seen a guy bust out karate to be honest with you.”
Confessions of a Young Thief
1:19:20 to 1:20:40
Recollections of stealing during childhood and the societal implications of it.
“They like babysitters for ignorant motherfuckers.”
Fame and Confidence
1:20:40 to 1:23:40
Discussing confidence in youth, relationships, and experiences with fame.
“You got to steal the ice cream in front of Poppy.”
Fat Joe's Ghetto Experiences and Confidence
1:24:01 to 1:30:14
Fat Joe shares stories from his youth and discusses his confidence despite challenges.
“They used to want to whip my ass out there.”
Discussion on Food Stamps and Responsibility
1:30:15 to 1:31:43
A conversation about the impact of food stamps on responsibility and ambition in the community.
“What I'm saying is the environment we came up on.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00What if your soda actually did something for you? Introducing Sky Pop Protein Soda. Sky Pop Protein Soda has 10 grams of complete protein, zero sugar, and real delicious soda taste. Sky Pop Protein Soda. Reach for the sky. Get your Sky Pop Protein Soda now at Target, Walmart, or Kroger. Amazon Health AI presents Painful Thoughts. I, um, I can't stop scratching my downtown. Mm-hmm. Yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my... downtown, some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing for Amazon Health AI. Chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24-7.
0:41Healthcare just got less painful.
0:47Pool days call for cookouts and lots of laundry. This Memorial Day at Lowe's. Save$80 on a Charbroil Performance Series 4 burner gas grill. Now just$199. Plus, get up to 45 % off select major appliances to keep dishes, clothes, and food fresh. Having fun in the sun is easy with us in your corner. Our best lineup is here at Lowe's. Ballot through 527. While supplies last, selection varies by location. See associate or lowes.com for details. What's up, y 'all? Summer's got a different tempo. Everything's a little looser, brighter. One plan turns into another. You hear something, you stay a little longer.
1:24Next thing you know, you're somewhere you didn't plan to be. It's those in-between moments. That's where the ideas hit. Conversations stretch out. Little memories sneak up on you. Sometimes it's just about what's in your hand. That color. That chill. The new tropical butterfly refresher from Starbucks. Guava and passion fruit flavors with mango pineapple flavored pearls. Yeah, that feels like summer before you even taste it. Funny how one small stop becomes the best part of the day. Start your summer rhythm with Starbucks. Try the new Tropical Butterfly Refresher from Starbucks.
2:05Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts This video I'm talking about you was on welfare I'll never hate on you when I see you in front of them rogue voices with them outfits I say that nigga deserve that shit because I seen that nigga poor
3:01What up, y 'all? This is Coke of the Dawn. Ooh, you know who it is, your boy Jada Kiss. You know what it is, the Joe and Jada Show. Every show legendary, every show iconic, and we got our foot on y 'all necks. Our next guest, self-explanatory. Biggest in the game. Biggest in the game. Well-known name in every household. You see him on stages. You see him on TVs. You see him courtside at the games. You might see him in the suite. The only person that phone can ring on the couch, and we don't get mad at him. Only person the phone can ring. You know what I mean? You see him in some of your best films you ever seen, your best stand-ups.
3:41You bump into him in the mall. You might see him anywhere. He's going to show you that same love. Ladies and gentlemen, make some noise for our brother, Mike.
3:53Man, I appreciate it, man. Two of my favorite guys in the game. You know what I mean? I got to get right to it, Mike. Let me tell you something. This product right here is ammonia-free. Why fight the time when you can rewind the time? Hello, Joe. Why be 53 when you can be 42? Why be 42 when you can be 31? Available at CBS and Sally's and Stop and Shop. I'm just trying to put you on to the shit. This ain't going to break you up. I've had some bad experiences. That's them guys. My chin swelled up like a honey bun. My shoe was... Oh, shit. And it had some pus coming out of it. And I went to the emergency, man, and I was so mad.
4:34I actually called Top Dog Law because I was going to sue it. I was going to sue the hell out of it. You know what? Don't use the product, brother. Don't use the product. We don't need a guy hard profile like Mike Yates talking about. Top dog law. But you know, I love that guy who do them commercials. Yeah, I read the book. You had an accident. They chopped your foot off. You thought you was that guy. Your shit is ending. Your wife thought you was flying. Not no more. When it comes to that time, call top dog law. The guy going to get you out of here. Nah, that guy, he's the best in commercials.
5:15Yeah, he is. Mike Epps, man, you got the young wife, man. Yeah, man. You living a fucking life. My wife wanted me to tell you that she said, man, tell Joe that his family be stylish. You know how the women are. You know how to spend money. They see the families all together. They know that shit. You know what I'm saying? But I see you. I said, damn, this guy, Mike Epps, man, this guy live a fucking life. And you do whatever the fuck you want. You pull out of old school, you pull out of new school. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. You know, hey, man, I was just telling a friend of mine that we all had the pleasure to grow up at the time that we grew up in.
5:52Because, man, I wouldn't trade that for nothing in the world. Because I remember being really, really young and the sun was shining different. It was like when you was young, it felt like the sun was hotter, right? That's a fact. Yo, you had to get, me, I had to get in the house when the shit went dark. Me too. And my mom's a scream and I ignore her. and then my father my father take one whistle everybody knew they was like yo that nigga go upstairs Cuban's called one whistle my mom's a call 20 times Joey, Joey my father hit it with that Cuban whistle niggas just grab the ball he gonna come down here and smack the shit out of you shit that could go all the way for a while to Fordham Road hey there your mom just called me You know.
6:42My house is all the way up the block. Somebody tell you that your mom is called. You better get your ass back down here. She had you with a Jason. Jason. No. That shit is all the way to Jersey Tunnel. Tell everybody your real name and shit. Listen, I used to play with my moms. I used to be like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, keep playing. We playing ball, ball. That shit go. The whistle, niggas. yo yo go stay that nigga you ever came in the house too late and the food was put up you like yeah where the food ain't no food on the stove he said you missed it I was about to sell a house the stove was totally clean white people clean you missed the homie I'm missing it don't warm it up you better not dirt warm it up I don't want to have no looming or forest I don't want to have an refrigerator door with none of that shit.
7:40I'm fat, Joe. They never deprived me of a meal. They left your shit. And I was the type, you know, my sisters, they used to pass me shit because they skinny. So if we had some steak or chicken, they'll back. Give it to Joey. He'll eat anything. Like, give it to Joey. He'll eat anything. I'm over here. They tried to kill you, man. They tried to kill you. Yo, I was fucking everybody's food up. They knew yo just passed that shit to Joe. That shit out of here. If you could say one, what's the main store or a bodega in your neighborhood that you would honestly say fucked you up? Because I know it was one of them.
8:14Well, we had Ernie's. The same 11 in my neighborhood destroyed me. No, we had Ernie's. Order juices. Ernie, now that you look back at it, God bless Ernie. I'm sure he's dead. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure he's dead. The shit he was telling, it's a guarantee that nigga's dead. What do you want me to say that nigga's dead? No, no, but listen. I'm sure he's dead. He's sick.
8:39I'm sure he did. I hope you're alive, Ernie. I hope you're alive. The man's probably going to be watching this and they raise up like this. The man was unsanitary like a motherfucker. He had this hurt fur in his fucking ears. He didn't groom his ears, right? But that motherfucker made these sausages with the onions, with the cheese. Ernie's when your mother sent you to Ernie's that shit was a delicacy it was like going to City Island and some shit it was like yo we gonna cause we either got the 50 cent spice ham cheese sandwich or we got Ernie's Ernie's a buck 25 buck 50 that's when you could buy a whole grocery with that type of money I don't know how old you are but I literally I'm 55 okay we the same age we the same age I used to go to the supermarket with my mother with two dollars and they get the rice the chicken, a pack of cigarettes and bread and the milk for$2.
9:39That's before Christ. When the fuck you can get on? No, that nigga was one and I don't know how you remember that. You was one when that was... We had Royal Farms, Met Food. I love going to the supermarket, man. And the laundromat. You sit there and roll clothes with your mama and shit. Let me tell you something. When my mom's got paid, that laundromat... I paid her. She was, she bring that taxi and she had them fucking bags in her hand. That shit was like crap. We running out to help her with the bags. Ma, let me help her. She had the old school donuts. Yeah. Two chocolate. Vanilla with the power.
10:19Two white. And the white. Two brown ones. Yeah. Joints. That shit was what, motherfuckers? Intimates. Ah, the intimates. You run through that shit with a glass of milk and it's over. Yeah. Yeah. And you come out on the porch with one and one of your friends say, man, go in there and give me one of them. And you know what you're telling? Man, my mother said we can't get nobody nothing. Oh, hell no. Yeah, my mother said that I got to go in the house right now. I can't share no. Man, go in there and give me one of them. My shit different. My father was a dictator. We had like bounty, the tissue bounty.
10:55One of my friends, we dropped some shit and he grabbed the bounty to wipe it. My father was like, yo, what the fuck? He was angry, huh? You know how much the bounty costs, nigga? Use this shit over here, not the bounty. I'm like, oh, my God. I think my friend never came back to my house. He grabbed bounty. So it had to be something really real to use the bounty. Yo, Mike, my father, may he rest in peace. I love him. I love him. But he was different. He was different. He'd take you to the store, buy you the fucking plastic coat instead of the leather. he'll embarrass me at every course. Because he didn't understand your mind frame of what the following designers was because he didn't come from that he came from what the fuck I don't know what you talk like when I got upset because I couldn't get no Jordan my dad was like that made you upset I took and put some pills in the toilet and flushed it and act like I overdosed and I'm laying on the ground and they called my mother was saying, oh God, he killed himself, he killed himself.
12:03And they called the real paramedics. They showed up. I'm laying on the ground acting like I'm dead. I'm like, oh, oh, shit. They're coming in now. They're going to blow the spot. They knew there wasn't nothing wrong with me. They was hitting my face and my eye was blinking. They was like, you okay? You okay? So you know what they did? They took me to, they played it all the way out with me. Took me all on the thing and shit. I could hear my brother. Oh, man. They took me down there and made me drink some black charcoal. That's like what you take if you overdose and take some pill. And I drunk it.
12:39Because I was trying to get some Jordans, nigga. And let me tell you some crazy shit. My mother bought me them shoes. And my dad was mad. It worked. Yeah, I worked. I had to go all the way through that. She said, I'm going to go ahead and buy them for me. everybody had the leather bomber the most disgusting part about it is my mom's gave the man the$150 go get him his jacket I go in there with him in June man and he start arguing with the man like 3-4 hours nigga everybody come up in yo my pops ain't give a fuck I don't know how to explain it to you he arguing with them over $10 yo 130 130 they come out the back they like Akua special.
13:25They came out with the plastic leather bomber. He bought that shit for like$50. He was like, yo, I was like, yo, yo, I don't want the plastic, Pop. I don't want the nigga. Yo, I had the plastic, man. The nigga fucked me up, man. Because he didn't know he was hurting you. He thought you looked good in that shit. Yo, he came back and gave my mother the$100. Look,$50. Is that why you're into clothes like that? Because they fuck with me, man. That hurt you, didn't it? Fuck with me. I was trying to say that. That hurt. I bought three outfits at the beginning of school. I had a green sweatsuit, red one and a blue one by the middle of the year.
14:02I had a green shirt, green pants. I mean, blue pants and red. Every day she was like, they was killing me. I don't know how the fuck y 'all grew up here because the pressure of being fly is on and popping. At a young age, right? I'm telling you, it was a time everybody was fucked up. You might get a pair of sneakers. How did you figure it out? You didn't. Figured it out when you got over. You know, you go in the sneaker store, you can't go to that rack over there. It's like a$40 to$60. It's still like that. It's angry. It's still like that for me and Bell Harbor. That's who end up being criminals.
14:44Yo, it's still like, listen. The niggas that can't afford it. It's criminal. Some niggas are haters, nigga. The niggas that can't afford it. It's still like that. Still like that to this day when you go to Bell Harbor. You know they got the two jewelry stores? A mean, broke nigga. Kill your ass. Listen, Bell Harbor in Miami to this day. I've been both of them. Hey, man, I'm not lying. I've been so broke before when I was younger. It was hard. When my friends be bragging on the nigga, I was one of them niggas to say, Shut up! Stop talking about that nigga like that. This dude's just praising the dude, man.
15:19And I'm like, damn, that's why we can't fucking get nothing. They do that shit now. Because your motherfucking ass, especially the drug dealer nigga. Oh, God. If you ever see somebody kiss an ass, then see the drug dealer kiss ass. That's the king of the kiss ass is somebody. And that's a kiss ass that is not genuine. People that kiss a drug dealer. Oh, Lord. That is the worst. I watched my brother. My brother was kingpin'. I watched him pull up. And niggas used to open that door, carry him out. I knew you'd lie. Yo, listen. A nigga picked him up like this. Meaning acting like this. Like they're in the movie and shit.
16:03He pull up, nigga slap. Everybody acting like he can't even breathe. Like, hey, listen. Yo, money man, chill, car. Yeah. Chill, chill, chill. I'm just watching niggas all through this shit. He fell off. he didn't have a nigga buy him a lollipop or an ice pop I watched the vice versa I watched him pull up like the godfather like the nigga used to wear the white suit walking through the neighborhood my brother used to come and look like they was paws sucking him off so legend when he was fucked up they would not look at this nigga like they was acting like I this this that I seen it with my own eyes.
16:47That's prepared me for the future. So when I come up and I get to the bag, they thinking it's like, yo, the money man all over again. I said, no, I watched what y 'all did to my brother. I watched people that my brother bought the TV, the furniture. He bought their whole crib, like gave it to them. Like furniture, this, this, that. Wouldn't let him in their house when he needed a meal. You know what they was thinking about? He gave us crack money. Fuck him. he gave us the money that he got from a dope fiend fuck him that's how they looked at it that's real shit because that means the whole game is corrupt and filthy that's why I was telling the young dudes they be so shocked about what happens to them in the streets I say man you didn't know that that come with it I said nigga everything anything you could think of motherfuckers that's why the streets ain't really it's really over with all these cameras you be a damn fool they gonna follow you away from wherever you did it I knew this Dominican dude ain't that crazy back in the day you could do some shit and drive off now you get away but now you can't I watch the Dominican dude all the way up on the highway that motherfucker follow you all the way back my brother what's it like for you yes sir being a comedian shout out to Country Kitchen Country Kitchen How's that food?
18:15I've been watching it on the gram. They took me to the white side over there. Yeah, when I seen you at the All-Star, I was running so much, man. But I should have invited you down there. They didn't take me to country kitchen. I'd have been there every day turning up. I was there every day. Fire. Every day. What was the go-to meal? Everything. Yeah, they got everything. Sounded. Fish. Yeah, they got everything. Cornbread was great. man you remember at Jimmy's Bronze Cafe I used to go to Jimmy's Bronze Cafe I used to do comedy in there Jimmy's Bronze Cafe back in them days yeah I used to do comedy in the Jimmy's Bronze Cafe and I used to do comedy at the Sugar Shack with Rob Stapleton that was on Jerome Avenue dang this is 1990 91 me and Tracy Morgan used to drive up I'd be in the car with Tracy he had a little a Mazda And he was riding.
19:12We'd be riding and going, doing them comedy shows and shit. I used to see y 'all, man. But you know how it is, man. Y 'all had a bunch of niggas. I said, I ain't about to walk up to him and say nothing to him. But I seen y 'all at S.O.'s. You remember that club, S.O.'s? S.O.'s. Shut up. My brother Mayor used to own the S.O.'s, man. I seen Mike Tyson at S.O.'s. I seen him outside the club. And I seen you one time. I seen you in a club. It was like in Co-op City. It was back in the day. It was a dingy-ass little spot. Corp. You been all over New York. Oh, man. I used to live in the Bronx. I used to live on a beach in St.
19:54Lawrence. Hold that thought right there. I got to go use the bathroom. Dominique Wilkins used to live on the Bronx, too. He did? No. Dominique Wilkins. Dominique Wilkins never even been in the Bronx. Grand Concourse 165. Did he? he must have had a girl up there yeah if you meet girls in them cities you gonna meet know the city that's a fact I just told my buddy yesterday I went back in the day I didn't even know about the Marcy Project I went a girl invited me over there I went in the apartment and when I came out it was a hundred niggas downstairs and I asked I said damn where the fuck them niggas come from she said oh they live here I said I can't walk out there between them she said fuck them bitch ass niggas And we walked out, and I swear them niggas was talking shit to me and her.
20:42And I swear this is the first time I ever heard a girl say, suck my dick, you bitch-ass dick. I said, what the fuck is it? That's a normal slang for a new year. I never heard no shit like a girl. I said, what'd you just say? You were down in a heartbeat.
20:59Yeah, man, I used to love the Bronx. I used to go to the Bronx, BBQ, Capone. Barbecue, BBQ Capone. What's the white guy? AJ. AJ White. AJ White. I was a fan of AJ White. AJ White was funny as fuck. AJ White was funny. He the one that said, what's Tupac's name spelled backwards? I said, what? He said, kaput. I said, you's a dirty motherfucker. I said, this family gonna fuck you up, nigga.
21:29Yo, man. It was a time where the comedians could say whatever the fuck they want to say. Actually, we wanted you to say some wild shit. Like, to me, as... Def Comedy Jam. You know, comedians, if they censor you or cancer you, then the world is... It don't make sense for us to be a comedian? Nah, it don't. It don't, because your shit is... We got to laugh at ourselves. Joe, what's the biggest artist you work with? Me? Jay-Z. Yeah. I work with Nas. I work with Eminem. You work with all of them. I work with Jadakiss. You work with a lot of them. I work with, you know what I'm saying, Budja Bonton.
22:06When you go reggae, you go Budja. I work with so many people. I was so blessed. The J-Lo's, the... Yeah. I think J-Lo probably the richest person I worked with. Yo, J-Lo go one time. This is Fat Fat Joe. Yeah. And she got a show. Three? Three Fat Joes ago. And she wants me to do a show with her Jingle Balls or some shit like that, right? And she ran... What's the name of it? Is it Jingle Balls or Jingle Bells? What's the name of it? Come on, Mike. It's Jingle Balls or Jingle Balls? I think it's big to the same. I think it's... I didn't make the name up. Anyway, let me tell the story. She asked me to come.
22:51They asked me what was my favorite meal, and I said Burger King. And, man, they went the whole... not first class she paid every ticket on the plane says a hundred something seats it was just us first class fucking Burger King on every chair wow and we came over here to do the show well she don't give J-Lo blow the bag bro you imagine American Airlines shit was empty just us first class she paid for every ticket you think she hasn't been at Sue's rendezvous she might have been I don't think she been Suze Rendezvous at least one time she been there I don't think she she worked there no I'm just saying you think she been in there one time yeah at least once well you she could have been in the wedge you know the wedge that shit was bullet scar what's the wedge like the Rolex is that like Sin City Sin City was a little better yeah it was under the wedge was like I remember I'll never forget I took a scar face in that motherfucker he was looking like yo these bitches like every bitch got a buck 50 or a bullet scar.
23:58That shit, the wedge? The wedge. That shit, that Hunts Point, one way in, one way out. Woo, Hunts Point. Like, I wouldn't go nowhere the fuck near it right now. Did you see that pimp movie that Brent Owens did about Hunts Point? You ain't never seen that happen. Back in the day, like the... Pimp stuff, you ain't never seen that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. With Brent Owens and it had Hunts Point. Documentaries. Yeah, you seen that? It really was like that. And I see... This area, right here was where you see these skyscrapers and all this shit it's called Hudson Yards this is where all the hoes and pimps was like real pimps if you came through here and they were they had a Cadillac down south down south everywhere they came out I seen some shit out here one time yeah this was crazy this was very this was the pimp this was the blade this was Hunts Point was the dirty this was the blade man this was it right here motherfuckers in Cadillacs some pimps and Rolls Royces, all type of shit.
24:56They was getting a lot of money back in them days. Yeah, see, that's the thing about that, about pimping, man, is that you didn't think about New York. You know what I mean? You wouldn't know that unless you came here. San Francisco had a lot of pimps. When I used to go out there, Minnesota had a lot of pimps. Yeah, that's that Midwest. They on the lake, Minnetonka Lake. They was out there on the lake line of the girl, man. Who was in the Minnetonka Lake? Prince and all. That's that famous lake out there. Apollonia and shit? And they be out on the boat. Yeah, you see a boat out there, and you see the girls on the boat, and you see the pimp, his hair with the perm.
25:33He be... The girls... You see his hair float back.
25:41That's one thing, funny thing, man. Like Vegas, if you go to like a diner at 4.30 in the morning, you'll see all the pimps, them and the girls will be done, and they be all eating and he be sitting there talking to them. Yeah, and passing the ketchup right there. And I told you, get back down there because I got to, yeah, put the salt right there and all the girls be eating and the pimps. That's what I was saying in San Francisco. You go in that diner and there be nothing but pimps. Yeah, with all the girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm motherfuckers with dead ass serious. That's Fillmore and Hunter's Point.
26:16They got a Hunter's Point too in San Francisco. Hunter's Point and Fillmore, yep, in San Francisco. on a 100th point here. That shit crazy. Yeah, it's crazy, man. Man, the pimp game. I don't miss those days. I'm evil. That's kind of... That's one hustle... It's like you're scaring somebody to be with you. Like the girl scared the leader. The girls is tough. The girls is tough, though, because that's a hell of a job. It is. It's horrible. It's slimy. That's horrible. It's a slimy job. It's just... I never got it. I used to try to get it when I thought about it. I said, man, these niggas going to hell.
26:56Yeah, because you know what they was doing to them girls? Yeah, because it's really, and that's, I think, why they give them so much time is because the manipulation part of it. It's like brainwashing, like how they did hell. Brainwashing. What's his name? Charles Manson. Yeah. Party hurts. It's kind of what they gave them the time for. Manipulating their minds. Yeah, because if they think you got that much control over somebody's mind, you can make somebody do anything. You're a dangerous motherfucker. Yeah, you like the killer, really. If you're making somebody out of a more control soul, I think that's what that is, you know what I mean?
Read the full transcript
27:33Yeah, that shit crazy. In regards to comedy, did you ever have an arch nemesis? Or what's one show you pulled up to that other people was on the card that you was like, yo, I got to kill this shit? Oh, man. All them motherfuckers. I never really had friends in comedy. I can't honestly say that. You know what I mean? The art form itself is not like rap music or any other thing. It's a one man band. You're everything. Yeah, you're everything. You don't, that's why it's like so dark. It makes you really, really cocky and it's kind of hard. You kind of got to be like in Eddie Murphy in this position to be like, hey, what's up, man?
28:21You know, but coming up in it, that shit is cutthroat. For sure it is. It really is. That shit is damn near worse than the rap gang. I'm serious. The shit that didn't happen, the shit I didn't heard, the shit, I ain't even got to say their names. Them niggas is off the chain. I done been off the chain. So I know what it is. It's dark. It's a dark art form. It don't brighten up until it starts paying you. And you can get therapy with it. You can buy your piece a little bit. Yeah, because I see a lot of the comedians commit suicide, all type of shit. Fucked up lives. These are the guys that make us laugh.
29:01Like, what's my man, Mark and Mindy? Yeah, Robin Williams. He was hilarious, bro. Yeah. And, you know, just every time I studied comedians, they always have like, you know. Dark lies. Dark lies. Well, you guys get shot. Oh, no, we get murdered at our prom. At least we get murdered at our prom. You know how dark that is, shit. Motherfuckers get murdered. Hey, I guarantee both of you motherfuckers got some damn damn life experiences fucking with this shit. Y 'all was in. Y 'all done saying it. I'll tell you what happened to me one time. I know motherfucker didn't try to kill me. Four, five times.
29:36I'm telling you. Straight up. Pull up. There's a club in Manhattan. Ain't I got the ugly ones with me. Like the real ugly ones. They're all in jail for having me, right? Yeah. We pull up Fat Joe show. It's like a thousand people there. Shit is ram-packed, right? When you show up, they give you your second half or whatever the deposit is. We ain't even talking about big money, right? So he said, yo, the man downstairs. So I go downstairs. How much you think you're getting? $4 ,000? $7 ,000 or something. So they had to give me$3 ,500. Yeah. Right? So I go downstairs, the Italian dude sitting there, he mad as hell.
30:16Like, yo, my man, we need our second half. He's just ignoring us. It's me and my man Flex. He's like, yo, he got an attitude. I was like, yo, bro, you know, it's a thousand people upstairs to see Fat Joe. This shit is ran back with my money. so Flex start talking to him you know Flex rest in peace was like live when he started talking crazy this nigga pulled out the biggest gun and we in the the whole club is partying up there we in the bro we turn around he's busting at us
30:51we running and I got the ugly ones outside but they got no clue that this is happening I got the ugly ones I got horrible guys with me outside but this shit is going we run upstairs we go outside then his people close the gate like a happy land with people in there a thousand people they knew the routine if he shoot at you close the gates even with the people in there so we outside like come outside this and that man let me tell you something the next day or something my man big Fred god bless him he used to work security there he came with the 3 ,500 was like, yo, they had shut down the club.
31:32That was going to be the last day. The police came and said, yo, you got to shut down this club. The Italian was tight. I don't know. He was tight over that. It had nothing to do, but he shot at us and we ran the fuck up out of there. That shit was... I didn't even know who he was. He didn't give a fuck who I was. He lost his lick. He lost the bar, the club. He was going to shoot at anything. He didn't give a fuck. And we was talking extra spicy. Fuck you, man. Yo, smack the shit out of you. You don't give me my ass. This is that. Pull that shit out. It was sparking, wasn't it? Them shits was going through that hallway.
32:13We running through that little hallway. Yeah.
32:19Today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Hard Rock Bet. Hard Rock. The NBA is finally back. Where's New York at? Right here. Big expectations this season. You can bet NBA games any night on the app. And if you think you know the future script for this season, lock in your future bets. Is this finally New York's year? Who's going to be MVP? Rookie of the year? If you know ball, bet. There's no better time to try your first bet on Hard Rock Bet. Place your first$5 bet. And if it wins, you'll score$150 in bonus bets on top of your payout. Plus, there's new promos every day on Hard Rock Bet, including profit boosts for football on Sunday and Monday.
33:02So if you're listening to this later, just open the app and check out what you get any day of the week. Download the Hard Rock Bet app and make your first deposit today. Let's get to it. Payable and bonus bets. Not a cash offer offered by the Seminole Tribe of Florida and Florida offered by the Seminole Hard Rock Digital LLC and all other states must be 21 and over and physically present in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Indiana, New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee, or Virginia to play. Terms and conditions apply. Concerned about gambling in Florida? Call 1-88-ADMITTED. In Indiana, if someone you know has a gambling problem and once helped call 1-800-9-WIFIT.
33:48Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLING. That's in Arizona, Colorado, Illinois, New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee, and Virginia. Amazon Health AI presents Painful Thoughts. I, um, I can't stop scratching my downtown. Yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my downtown, some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing for Amazon Health AI. Chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24-7. Healthcare just got less painful. What if your soda actually did something for you? Introducing Sky Pop Protein Soda. With 10 grams of complete protein, zero sugar, and 45 calories, Sky Pop Protein Soda offers four delicious flavors with big taste and real benefits.
34:44Light, refreshing, and ready for wherever your day takes you. It's anytime protein that helps you reach higher. Sky Pop Protein Soda. Reach for the sky. Get your Sky Pop Protein Soda now at Target, Walmart, or Kroger. Everybody knows Shaq, but off camera, he's just a regular guy. People never believe me when I say I'm just like them. I take out the trash, do dishes, and I struggle with moderate obstructive sleep apnea or OSA. And a lot of adults with obesity also struggle with moderate to severe OSA. You know those scary breathing interruptions during sleep? The loud snoring, choking, and daytime fatigue?
35:20I knew I had to talk to my doctor. Don't sleep on the symptoms. Learn more at dontsleeponosa.com. This information is provided by Lilly, a medicine company. And now, another appliance triumph from your friends at Grand Appliance. Meet Jan. Her fridge died days before a dinner party, but she didn't panic. I just called my guy at Grand Appliance. He recommended a large capacity GE profile option with fingerprint resistant stainless steel and a convertible middle drawer. I can optimize for meat, beverages, snacks or wine. Best of all, it was in stock and they delivered next day. Another crisis averted by Grand Appliance.
35:56Shop GrandAppliance.com to learn more. Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public, you can build a multi-asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto, and now generated assets, which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20 % year over year. You can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one-of-a-kind index, and lets you backtest it against the S &P 500.
36:29Then you can invest in a few clicks. generated assets are like etfs with infinite possibilities completely customizable and based on your thesis not someone else's go to public.com slash podcast and earn an uncapped one percent bonus when you transfer your portfolio that's public.com slash podcast paid for by public investing brokerage services by open to the public investing inc member finra and sipc advisory services by public advisors llc sec registered advisor generated assets is an interactive analysis tool output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice complete disclosures available at public.com slash disclosures We The One's Comedy Tour.
37:03Tell us about that. We The One's Comedy Tour is a tour that, this is our third year. And man, we done had some of the best young, hot comedians from DC Youngfly to Carlos Miller, Mojo Brooks. Last year we had Lil Duval, Country Wayne. We switch it up every year, man. This year we got those guys, Mojo Brooks, Carlos Miller, DC Youngfly, me, Jay Ski. I'm headlining this year. I usually host it. But this time, I'm going up last, and I'm going to be the OG on shit. I hate that, though. I hate when you're like, you know, Martin called me a couple of times. Yeah. He do this type of shit, and he'll come out and be like, thank you.
37:43Like, I'm waiting for Martin. No, I don't do that. No, I don't do that. Right? You ever got jerked in one of those? I come in as a bunch of dudes I don't know. No, no, no. He hosts. He fuck them up. I'm doing everything. Yeah. He's there. You see him all night fucking it up. Yeah. And I can go up behind all of them and still do 30 minutes. I got that in me. You know what I mean? I'm one of them comics. For a fact, in the comedy, there's definitely got to be people who, they got to be biters. That is. Like, back in the days, they used to have guys that hear your rhymes and then they go put it on wax before you.
38:13Yeah. It's fucking hits. Like, with y 'all, you ever heard somebody talk of that shit and you was like, yo, what the fuck? That's my joke. Yeah, the whole fucking business. Oh, shit, Mike. Shit. Yo, Mike. Hey, well, I'm going to tell you some crazy shit. This is how you know that when you really own, when a big motherfucker steals something from you. And you like, damn. And you saying to yourself, you know what you say when you see a big motherfucker that steals something from you? You say, he had to hear from a small motherfucker that stole it from me. You know what I mean? He didn't get it directly from me.
38:47No, a small motherfucker stole it from me and got around him and he took it from him. He ran with the wave. Yeah, you know that motherfucker, oh, a thief, he gone. You remember a motherfucker take your bicycle. you might not never see it again. You might see the frame on your... Yeah, the handlebars. Yeah, nigga. Man, them are my forks. Nigga, that bike is dissected and gone. You know what's crazy? I stole a truck once, right? Now I'm going to keep it real. Automobile? A truck, right? I had the same truck, but this guy had the fucking, the wide body kit. Yo, God bless you, man. I gave back so much.
39:29God covered me for that in the karma. I stole a truck. We went to a nice neighborhood. They had the fancy hood. They had a... We took that bitch. Nah, we stole that shit. We took the shit. We took it to the shop. They put the hood. The shit was stated. Y 'all chopped. When they're too chopped, the shit was the flyest truck in the South Bronx. Sound system, this and that. About six months later, they stole that shit from me, man. They found nothing. That's right. Motherfucker took every... That karma come right back. They stole that shit. That's what made me a thief. I got everything that ever happened to me.
40:05I was not that yet until it happened to me. I did not fucking get in the streets until the streets happened to me. They stole my bike and I said, hell no, I'm stealing bikes. They jumped me. I said, hell no, I'm jumping niggas. Motherfucker snuffed me. I said, nope, I'm snuffing niggas. they robbed me I'm robbing niggas I'm not lying it make you it make you do that that's why they say jail's a terrible place cause you go in there for one thing you come back you learn your nails done taught you gotta steal everything moving that's right you run into real career criminals that's why I always said I said I said you know when you young and you go in one of them badass little kids house and you see pictures of him when he young on his mantle he like oh fuck him he ain't that bad but then it was kids that smell like pee that you know didn't have parents they'll kill your ass that's the motherfucker that's he's jealous of you why y 'all together y 'all supposed to be shooting at another motherfucker he's the one that shoots you in the back I seen shit like that I'm telling the truth not in person no not your kiss not in person I seen they smell like pee that's been through shit He killing you, nigga, in a robbery.
41:26You got the gun out. He behind you. He shoot you in the back. Wow. Look, I used to be jealous. Because he already wanted to get your ass. And I had my mother and father, but his relationship with him and his dad, I used to be so jealous because he was just so tight. That's how I was, too. I'd be like, damn, my father wasn't even around. My father don't hug me like that. The nigga don't show me love like that. I was just getting jealous of you just now when you said, I was talking about your dad. I was saying, would he shut the fuck up? But I didn't say that. Oh, so you're saying I was blessed with him even getting the cheap coat.
42:01What? Man, my dad used to pick me and my brother up. And God bless his soul. I love him still. My dad used to go pick me and my brother up and act like he was gone, take us for the weekend, and drop us over another lady house. And my mother said, how was it? I was like, we was over a bitch named Pat House all weekend. she was like, Pat. I was like, yep, we was over Pat. This nigga was out with another lady. I don't know what the fuck he was doing. But what I love about him is that he did make sure he knew who he was. So that part of me, I'm glad I'm not a grown man trying to find out where and who my father was.
42:43That's a whole nother level of the game that I got friends like that. Don't know where. Yeah. They act like I'm their daddy sometimes. your friends act like you well there's ones that don't have a daddy you know when I'm in a position niggas start acting I ain't fucking with these I tell the nigga I ain't your daddy nigga and them niggas get mad I'm gonna kill you nigga you see somebody but I'm just telling you the nucleus of the mental health part of people mentality you know what I'm saying that's some real shit somebody that don't know their father you dealing with a whole another type of person.
43:23It's hard being a stepdad. A lot of them are strong. The strongest people you ever want to meet are people who are missing something. You know what I'm saying? That is the strongest person. Those are the strongest. They have to go through the most adversity. Yeah, they the leaders. Like my wife, God bless her. Her diet passed when she was young. She didn't know who we were. But my wife is so powerful and resilient. and she, I'm the bitch when it come to her, I be sitting there crying about some shit and she say, oh man, that's right. I ain't never seen a woman that's stronger than a man like that.
44:00Every now and then somebody get a flag. What the fuck out of here, man? Every now and then somebody get the flag, huh? He the bitch. I ain't the only one that get the flag. Yeah, nigga, because I have seen some pictures with you and your wife and you looked at humble to the motherfuckers. I look like I was the bitch in the relationship. Y 'all had pink on and everything. I said, she made me put the pink on and pink Rolls Royce and everything. Let me tell you something. Nigga had some flyers in his head. I said, she done melted that nigga, man. All we want is peace and harmony. All we want is peace and harmony.
44:33That's it. I'll do anything for that. All I want is seek the kingdom. Seek the kingdom up. No beef. Well, I got a TV show coming with Kenya Barris. Me and him wrote a million movies. That's so close. I got a TV show with Kenya, too. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, Kenya and Kenya are hustling. Jimmy's Bronze Cafe, baby. Yeah. The Upshaws is coming out. The last season of The Upshaws, me and Wanda Sykes on Netflix. Only on Netflix, y 'all, come out January 20th. I got another movie coming out with Kevin Hart. 75. Some shit. Me and this nigga. I don't know the name of the motherfucker. It was a big budget wide movie.
45:13You know what I mean? I got a little piece of money out of it. Fuck it. Yeah, but... You stay working. You stay blessed. I stay in the game. Because you see them, they're almost, comedians are like America. You either rich or you dirt poor. I don't believe that. I see some... There ain't no middle class, Nick. Nah, it ain't. There ain't no middle class. It's either you rich or you poor. You're either sleeping in your car. Because there's a lot of comedians. Because there's a lot of comedians. And all of our stories are like that. That's what I'm saying. Man, I moved to New York in 1991 and didn't know nobody from Indiana.
45:50And what you thought, like you was going to blow up here? Like that's what the deal was? I came here and lived for 10 years. Rolled the trains everywhere. You know, one thing I did, I said, I got to start wearing what them niggas wear. So I went and bought some Timberlands. I started learning the club, because the shit I had when I got here from Indiana, when I was dating girls, they was like, you got to take that shit off. You know, New York girls, They liked me, but they was just laughing in my accent. They's like, you got to take that shit. I had a long leather trench coat with like a... A peacock.
46:24Yeah, that motherfucker had a three-quarter length with a strap. Cowboy boots. That was strapped. My wife, my girl said, the girl I was with, she said, you got to take that shit off. You know what I mean? Yeah, I had some girlfriends, man, all over in the Bronx. Man, I done been on the train. I done been on the six train with a girl, riding, going to do shows. and that was the crazy thing about my journey is that I was here for 10 years I've been around everybody and everything and I was a ghost nobody even seen me and I said to myself if I was a hit man I could have killed the whole hip hop business yeah you could have because I was at the shark bar I've been in Puffy's restaurant I didn't been I didn't been standing right next to Jay-Z at the Latin Quarter he was about to go on the stage nigga had a had a polo shirt on and a little hat.
47:15I swear to God, I'm not lying to you. And I was a ghost. I was sitting there. I watched everything. But I did a lot of comedy shows. I used to do shows with talent. Man, I used to host the Peppermint Lounge. It was a club in Jersey. Off the chain. Motherfucker be dead in front of it. They still got the show going. Tretch, Naughty by Nature, and them coming there every night. Off the chain. But I'll be telling this story to tell kids that, especially kids that are not from big cities because believe it or not, these small towns and small cities, some of the realest motherfuckers you ever met in your life come from them towns.
47:55I'm talking about stop, down, cohort. The only way you can really find out street niggas is to go to the feds. And a nigga from Stanky Hall, Texas, cut your head off, bro. You know what I'm saying? So you have to understand, there's real motherfuckers all over the world. And I came to this city, man, and I didn't have nothing. I got on Def Comedy Jam. The first thing I ever did that I got on here, I was an extra on New York Undercover. It had Malik Yobo and the little Spanish dude. I was sitting there looking at Malik talking shit, and he laughing at me because I had an accent. He said, man, where you from?
48:35I said, I'm from Indiana. And, oh, man. Tell you, I got some cold stories. I was dating a girl that was in the Marcy Projects. This was before I even knew anything about Jay-Z. Her name was Peanut. And I'm dating her, and I go up. She invited me to the project. Hell, yeah. She invited me to the project. I go to the projects, and I go upstairs. This is the first time I smell fizzy elevator. I'm talking about, damn, I'm in New York. I'm from Indiana. Man, I come downstairs, and when I walk out, I mean, before I walk out, I see a hundred niggas standing. I'm like, where the fuck did they come from?
49:07Yes. They on both sides of the door. And she like, oh, fuck them. Come on. I'm like, oh, no. Ain't no fuck them niggas. But ain't nowhere to go. Gotta go through. They got these skips on Instagram now. Like, with dudes come and take their girl to their crib. And it's in the projects. There's 10 niggas in that. Yo. Nigga. Let me tell you something. When I walked through there, them niggas was talking shit. They must have knew her. They grew up with her. Yeah, they grew up with her. I told him. That was the first time I ever told her to girl. Tell him, suck my dick, bitch-ass nigga. I said, what the fuck?
49:39Because I ain't never heard no girl tell a nigga this. I didn't even know you had a nigga. Yeah, yeah. Shit flagrant out here. That blew my mind. That was a wild shit to me. You know what I'm saying? I said, ooh, Lord. I'm glad they knew her because if they didn't know her, they were saying her real name. They were saying, oh, thank God she wasn't saying it. Because we used to have girls in my building. She probably was. Oh, see, I wouldn't have came over there. Oh, no. The shotgun come out. Boom. Yo, you got to run your jewels. Yeah, you got to run it. But that was all drug dealer shit. That's how that shit went.
50:12Yeah. Comedy Mount Rushmore. Come on, Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, or Martin Lawrence, Bernie Mac, and Robin Harris. Bang! Can't nobody beat that five. That's monster five. Who gonna beat that five? Ooh, wee! Who gonna beat that five, man? Nobody beating that Richard Pryor. No. You know what? Hold up. Yo. there is an exception I didn't hear Dave Chappelle well Dave Chappelle Dave Chappelle is he's younger than me don't matter he ain't up there with them to me that's my opinion now I have to put him in a category that's right after them you can't tell the kids that me and him looking up at the same person see what I'm saying I get it I'm the same way you say it.
51:03If it was hip hop, we would mention LL, Carey Razz, shit like that. We ain't going to mention nobody. Like you would get mad if a nigga tried to say you wanted you to look up to Tim Dog. Let me tell you something. If a nigga tried to get you to look up to Tim Dog. Let me tell you a story, though. That's crazy that he said that. Hold up. Hold up. How about, can I say something? Can I fucking say something? How about none of us in the Bronx know nothing about Tim Dogg. Tim Dogg was the first 6 '9". The nigga had real niggas behind him from the 9, but we never knew where the fuck Tim Dogg was from.
51:42He like, he fuck Compton, I'm from the Bronx, I'm from the... We don't know where Tim Dogg is from. He wasn't from the Bronx? You can't go to a building and say this is Tim Dogg's. Nobody knew where he was from. You lied. Many years later, I don't give a fuck. What I'm trying to tell you is I'm trying to think about... some brave shit though, didn't he? He had dudes behind him that were the real deal. That was the nine live group West Coast in the 90s. I dare you try to call your cousins in the Bronx to tell us where's Tim doing from? Everybody, and he was saying he was from the Bronx, but he had the West Coast niggas mad at the Bronx.
52:18He also had... Listen, that might have started East Coast, West Coast beat. Let me explain something. That was the first one. It's the first blow. I'm trying to tell you. When 6ix9ine was talking that shit, Yeah. I'm asking my mans, who's the guy standing behind him? And they're like, yo, that's such and such. That's such. He's the real deal. Made me think 6ix9ine was real. Because I'm looking at the video. He's talking all that shit. Everybody behind him is the real deal. Tim Dogg was the first 6ix9ine. He was out there. Fuck Compton. I'm from New York. This, that. Everybody behind him was the realest.
52:54I knew Tim Dogg, but I'm just trying to tell you, I try to do the math. after. I thought about Tim Dawg and I was like, yo, where's Tim Dawg from? And I'm asking every nigga in the Bronx. And nobody could point to the building. Or the hood. Like, they knew everybody standing behind him. That was iGod. Rest in peace. That was all the non-guys. They was the real deal. But him... Tim Dawg, because the boy ain't shit. I think they take this death for some shit. Yeah, I'm telling you. Yo, Google Tim Dawg. Where's he at now? I'm telling you the truth. on the crowd. Bing, bing, bing. They do? Castle Hill.
53:33Nah, just kidding. He eat from Castle Hill. I seen him at VIM. Tim Dog died? Oh. God bless Tim Dog. That nigga was eating in White Castle, man. That nigga's eating White Castle. Peace, Tim Dog. White Castle's on the FDR. You remember that White Castle on FDR? White Castle's still popping. I used to eat that White Castle. I used to shop at that Modell's. I used to live in the Bronx. I'm telling you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're talking about by Soundview. Man, I used to, I swear. I used to go on Fordham Road and shop. And my buddies got out of prison. They used to come. I used to fly them.
54:14Y 'all watched them fuck a dude up on Fordham Road the other day on Instagram. You heard? Yeah. Kiss. They beat the brakes off this dude. But he dessert. He was like a homeless dude. Butt naked. and some dude got it into him and he was fighting. He was about to fuck the guy up. How did you wrestle a naked nigga? No, I'm telling you. I swear to God. Some dude got it into him. I don't want that nigga. Yo, listen, yo, Kay. Kay, could you believe his penis is going to touch your leg, nigga? Yo, I'm going to tell you. Yo, hold up. I'm going to tell you. You're going to hear some meat. You're going to hear something doing like this.
54:48You're going to hear something like, something is going to do like this. Can I say this story? That's my fucking point. This shit is flagrant, man. Yo, this shit is foul. Yo, listen. I'm trying to tell you. Yo, all right. I want everybody on here to Google this shit. Listen. Yo, let me tell a story. Yo. Man, you run off the road every time. Okay, now. Yo. Now can we clear the floor? I don't make this shit up. I don't make this shit up. I just tell it like it is. It's a big homeless motherfucker ass naked on Fordham Road. Here we go. He argued. Listen, Mike. He arguing with a dude. The dude tried to fight him.
55:41The dude tried to fight him. He's butt naked. That was horrible. This guy starts fucking the dude up. The nigga nigga. The whole neighborhood, even the Paws, the Frankfurter man. Helped him. The ladies. Everybody beat this nigga's ass. The butt naked dude, the whole four of them rows jumped him. 50 niggas like, yo, get the fuck out of here. Like, yo, when I say the ladies walked by and was like, boom. Like, he was fouled. Yeah, because there's kids around. That nigga about six, seven foot tall. They whooped that nigga's ass. Broly, yo, he butt naked in the middle of daytime. It looked like the morning.
56:20Yo, yo, Mike, he about to beat the shit out of the kid who is one guy who had the courage to be like, yo, my man, what the fuck you doing? He start beating him up. You hear what I'm saying? How do you deal with a nigga? I mean, just even when it go next to a naked homeless person. No, no, but he told them. One thing about police is that it's hard for them because they got to lock a nigga up. Yeah, they got to lock a nigga up. That nigga's ass. I think they do that often. I think they do that often too that's not a far fetcher I'm saying I seen the video y 'all can google it the little guy tried to tell him my man you was woman out here like fuck you I don't know what it was I couldn't hear the volume but they scrapped and the butt naked nigga was getting the best of him man they beat the brakes off this month they hit this nigga with the Frank for the truck everybody got in on this shit you know in the neighborhood they don't want to they tight at this shit the nicest guy in the world walked by and stomped that nigga they all gave it to him like everybody whole neighborhood are y 'all gonna be in the music I know y 'all gonna be in the hip hop museum man they gotta pee yeah yeah I fuck with the I fuck with the uh hip hop museum shout out uh Ruben Diaz no it's gonna be in Manhattan Bronx it's in the Bronx by 149th yo what's up they said they doing a new you don't wanna fuck with it they saying they doing a new one it's in the Bronx man shout out to Rocky shout out to Ruben Diaz we just that's where they gave me the award it's gonna be in the Bronx where hip hop started and the locks man I'm telling you let me tell you something about the locks I thought I was fried my guess he fried the locks got cause y 'all got fans in Cincinnati and shit like that we fuck with all that y 'all touched a lot of Midwest motherfuckers Joe got a lot of Florida they love you in Florida The Trumpers, huh?
58:19Florida, they fuck with Joe Crack, huh? But you know, it's people, the older people down in Florida, they don't even know you rap. They just know you as who you are. And if you say, you ever heard of Fat Joe's song? He say, I didn't know he made music. I say, yeah, that's where he... Then after the music, you say, you know Fat Joe was drunk? I didn't know. And they see them pictures when you had the big black coat. you know you dapper dance shit no this was the army military thought you didn't have no money you was poor as a motherfucker in this video I seen this video I'm talking about you was on welfare that boy never hate on you when I see you in front of them rogue voices with them outfits I say that nigga deserve that shit cause I seen that nigga poor you see me with the herringbone chain You didn't have nothing.
59:14You had a black army jacket and some boots. You were dusty as hell. So when I see you clean, I'm like, oh, that nigga deserved that shit. That's what I'm trying to say. Jadick is too. Damn. Dusty nigga in the first lot. Them first lot, them first motherfuckers. Ooh, that young Jadick was going to prison. That's why when I see Jadick his real father, I said, ain't no way in hell that nice-ass man had that dusty-ass little boy like that. I said, he didn't do nothing that man told him to do. You could tell. I said, how the hell? I said, that nigga's father looked like a principal in high school. How the hell he have a dusty-ass criminal son like that?
1:00:06I think that boy didn't do nothing that man told him to do. That's a fact. Yo, man, but thank God, man, we made it through the— we slipped through the cracks, man, and that's what we be trying to like— I'll tell you the truth. I get up every day, and I can't believe it. I swear to God, I'm telling you all, guys, God is real. Did you get up? No. I can't believe that I own a house. Like, literally. I can't believe I literally own a house. I'm just saying, I can't believe I own a Metro. Yo, this guy's crazy. I can't believe I own a house. I can't believe I got a car. I can't believe, you know, shit was fucked up when I grew up.
1:00:48This shit is the simple things. The littlest things. Do you kind of get mad a little bit sometimes when you see? Do you kind of get mad? I mean, you don't get mad, but sometimes I get a little frustrated with my kids because I wish sometimes. I wish they could live a week. They can go back and do a week. And I said, man, this one week, they'll come back and be humble as a motherfucker. I know, man. You know what the problem is? I can't even explain it to them. You know what I mean? Never going to reach. Yeah, I can't explain it to them. I'm happy that I can do it for them, but I'm mad. We didn't toast, Jada.
1:01:25We ain't toast yet. In fact. This to the tour, comedy tour. Yeah. We the ones, y 'all. We the one store. Get tickets available right now. Well, acknowledge yourself. Make sure you get tickets to the comedy tour, man. Explain something to you. Third year. It's third year and there's more to come. Yo, Mike, let me explain, Cindy. This podcast. Yeah. Then there's the Joe and Jada. Y 'all doing a great job, man. How many episodes y 'all got? Like 50-something now. Oh, you look like me. Oh, no. We hydroplaning right now. Shit. Mike, so y 'all could know. I did Noriega's first one, the drink champs.
1:02:03I did the first fucking drink champ. I was the first one on there. And look at his ass. That motherfucker, I'm telling you, this is the best thing that could ever happen to us. And it's good that y 'all doing it now because it's security to burn out niggas. If you ain't in, it's over with. Because I'm telling the truth. And it's hard to get a good combination. Because they been saying they get in the bag and all that. Now I see everybody's mother and cousin with a podcast. I said, yo, I hope I ain't. It don't work, though. We missed the train. It ain't working. The wire, nigga, the train. No, it ain't working.
1:02:40It ain't working. No, no, no, no. Everybody coming up to yo, congratulations on yours. I got mine. I'm like, all right, brother, because I've never been a hater. Like, all right, brother, no problem. This guys I know, they don't even talk to words. They're like, yo, I got my own podcast. Yo, good luck. Like, get ahead. Well, I'm like, yo, did we miss the golden age? No, the combination got to work. And another thing, too, you got to always remember, you came in the door already made. You already made it. That's the shit you say, too. You know what I'm saying? It's hard to make yourself and then make yourself.
1:03:20You got to, I'm going to make myself. Now, that's like a Stephen A. or something. That's like one out of a million. Somebody that really didn't know that just make their personality just attractive. You know when I knew we was big? Yeah. We had Stephen A. Smith two days ago on here, and he shitted on me on my own show. But you know what that told me when I went home? You was on? I thought to myself, I said, we got to be on fire. He made it his business to come on here and shit on me. Yeah. He see us like the train is coming, baby. The train is. I'm telling you, when somebody that big turn around and snipe you, say Mike Epps is coming up in the game and he get little baby kids to diss him, he said, oh, shit, I must be.
1:04:06They feeling the foot stuff. Yeah, you got to look at that because they ain't going to pick on you if you ain't popping. Get on their radar, yeah. Yeah. He said, hold up. If a motherfucker like to, if you like it too much, you're fucked up. I told him, yo, I want to be the Knicks commentator. He said, nah, nah, nah. That shit ain't going to work. He's like, yo, don't come in this space. Did he say that? Yeah, he said that shit. I agree with him. He said, man, you tell. He said, Joe, you tell him. He said, you tell so much stories. The sky's the limit. Nobody can tell you what you can't do, man.
1:04:33Yeah, yeah, Stephen A was up here, but I saw what it was. We fucking everybody up. Everybody dizzy right now. They can't believe the shit that's going on. Mike, sit me and say, your jaw, I'm in town. Can I pull up? I did. This guy sell out stadium. I did. I did. But he know who the hottest niggas in town. But I like that. Yeah, I always. We got the smoking gun. I always fuck with Jada. And I've been fucking. The shit is in our hands. The weather. It's pop. When you shoot. You know when you shoot and you got the firepower. This is off one sip. Y 'all, if he finish that whole thing, y 'all asses in trouble.
1:05:12Oh.
1:05:18Now, though. Yo, Mike, can I talk my shit, though? Talk your shit. Pop your shit. Pop your shit. I said, I seen them. And they was Milli Vanilli in them. I seen them all and they was Milli Vanilli. If you don't know what Milli Vanilli is, youth, they was faking the fuck. And these guys was out here talking big shit. And they was criticizing motherfuckers and they never did shit in hip hop in their life. And I know. Never sold a record, huh? Never sold a record. I know the day they saw, hey, Joe and Jada, they knew their shit was over. Oh, yeah. I don't give a fuck who you is, how big you is, whatever the case may be.
1:06:02Them niggas knew it's over. Why? We got top five dead or alive. We got Fat Joe. He don't give a—Fat Joe don't give a fuck.
1:06:15Amazon Health AI presents Painful Thoughts. I, um, I can't stop scratching my downtown. Yeah, but I'm not itching to go downtown and tell a receptionist I'm here to talk about my downtown. Some things you'd rather type than say out loud. There's no question too embarrassing for Amazon Health AI. Chat your symptoms and get virtual care 24-7. Healthcare just got less painful. What if your soda actually did something for you? Introducing Sky Pop Protein Soda. With 10 grams of complete protein, zero sugar, and 45 calories, Sky Pop Protein Soda offers four delicious flavors with big taste and real benefits.
1:07:01Light, refreshing, and ready for wherever your day takes you. It's anytime protein that helps you reach higher. Sky Pop Protein Soda. Reach for the sky. Get your Sky Pop Protein Soda now at Target, Walmart, or Kroger. Everybody knows Shaq, but off camera, he's just a regular guy. People never believe me when I say I'm just like them. I take out the trash, do dishes, and I struggle with moderate obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA. And a lot of adults with obesity also struggle with moderate to severe OSA. You know those scary breathing interruptions during sleep? The loud snoring, choking, and daytime fatigue?
1:07:38I knew I had to talk to my doctor. Don't sleep on the symptoms. Learn more at dontsleeponosa.com. This information is provided by Lilly, a medicine company. And now, another appliance triumph from your friends at Grand Appliance. Meet Jan. Her fridge died days before a dinner party, but she didn't panic. I just called my guy at Grand Appliance. He recommended a large-capacity GE profile option with fingerprint-resistant stainless steel and a convertible middle drawer. I can optimize for meat, beverages, snacks, or wine. Best of all, it was in stock, and they delivered next day. Another crisis averted by Grand Appliance.
1:08:14Shop GrandAppliance.com to learn more.
1:08:41I to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you backtest it against the S and P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's go to public.com slash podcast and earn an uncapped 1 % bonus. When you transfer your portfolio, that's public.com slash podcast paid for by public investing brokerage services by open to the public investing Inc member FINRA and SIPC advisory services by public advisors, LLC, SEC registered advisor. Generated assets is an interactive analysis tool.
1:09:11Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com slash disclosures.
1:09:19I'm going to tell you the most powerful thing y 'all got going on. I just told Jay the outside is y 'all totally different. And he's got a whole different story. He come from a similar, but not close, but a different area than you. You come from a different area. And man, y 'all just different. If they would have had another guy that was similar to you or another guy, that shit wouldn't have worked. And that's really what is paired up in the podcast thing. It's like you can't really put the same people around each other. Listen, I thank God for Jaden. You got to have peanut butter and jelly, bro.
1:09:55He brings me back to life. Peanut butter and jelly. You got it. You know what I mean? If I had, imagine my co-host was Yayo. We have rap beef with guys who ain't even here. when we go to heaven, we already know we got beef. Or just like a French Montana or something. He slow me up and be like, yo, chill, crack, chill. Imagine I had a Tony or a LiveWater. We got beef. We can't even come outside. Some of these guys can't come outside. That's another thing. Some of these guys... Yo, kids, come on, kids. You know it's true. A lot of these guys talking this shit. What if you did an interview? What if it was you and Granddaddy IU, rest and peace?
1:10:39It's something new from the Granddaddy IU. You don't know about real hip-hop, right, Tim? Thank God I knew the words, Kiss. Yo, Kiss, at least I knew the words, right? Hey, can I ask you some hip-hop, real hip-hop questions? We here. That's what we here for. Do you think K Solo was the first Redman? I don't know if he's the first Redman. K Solo was really, really, really dope. Spellbound. I don't know what it was. I tell your mom about her business. I thought they was brothers. She and my business. I thought they was brothers. Me too. I thought they was. Spellbound. Spellbound? Spellbound. Spellbound is DMX.
1:11:23DMX? They're at Beasts in jail. Did they? That's why I won't get at me, doggy, say, tell that nigga K Solo. That's all over Spellbound. Damn, that's some shit right there. Spellbound when they was in the mining block in Long Island somewhere and locked up together. And they said DMX did it. They solo got on and stole Spellbound. You know who I thought was related to DMX? Because I was around him one time and the nigga's energy was just like him, Father MC. You remember Father MC? You think Father MC was like DMX? No, I'm saying that I seen him and he was wild. He was just wild. I didn't think he was like him.
1:12:04But I, you know. No, Father MC was the man. But I seen him. I just seen him. I seen him too recently. Yeah, he was wild as hell. Father MC was. Listen, I got one DMX story. DMX and Big Pun had a show in like a baby arena in Brooklyn. We went to the gas station and DMX said, hold up one second. And stuck the guy up for his chain and came back with the guy chain on. and I'm like yo there's just no way this nigga just had the whole world going get at me dog and he stick this nigga up for his chain in the gas station I don't understand how that happens like I'm like yo DMX yo DMX you know DMX more than anybody I see him DMX and he was he was seeing me at the gas station he was yo he was talking shit da da da and man and he seen my eye that motherfucker turn into a whole nother person.
1:13:02Yes, ma 'am. Yes, ma 'am. Thank you. Oh, God bless you. I love you. I said, Dad, what kind of nigga is this that turned into a sweet nigga? This nigga turned, I'm telling you, turned into a church dude. Right in front of, you know what I'm saying? Like, he had another... He came to my show, and he was in the back, and Dougie Fresh was on the stage, and he said, DMX was going up. He had some Popeyes. He had some girls with him. He was eating a Popeye. He was on one that night. Yeah, Max was sexy. He was like, fuck that shit. He said, I said, I'm going to bring you up. He said, well, come on. Bring me up.
1:13:40Tell that nigga to get on stage with all this hibbity-jibbity shit. Talking about Dougie Preston up there.
1:13:51Hibbity-hibbity. That sound like an extra shit. Yeah, man. Let me tell you something. That nigga pulled me over that time. Remember he pulled me over trying to buy my car? and that nigga had a light-skinned nigga that was about 6 '6 that was dusty. He wouldn't even smile. I said, what's up, man? He wouldn't even say that. That was big. Yeah, yeah. What's wrong with his big light-skinned? Had a big square box head. That nigga was dusty. I said, damn, where'd you get this nigga at right here, man? You ordered this nigga. You want to know what's crazy? What's wrong with just being security or holding somebody?
1:14:25Like, when I come and I see Jadakiss Crew, I'm like, yo, what's up? What's good, y 'all? This, this, that. And you see, let's say, welcome home, Max B. Max B just came home. And I see videos of other rappers going to say what's up to him. And his security is like, looking at the niggas like, what are you supposed to do? Like, are you going to beat up the rapper that's coming to say hi to him? Welcome home. They looking like, like, is that your job? Is that the qualification, my nigga? Like, what is the qualification of it? Like, if you know they coming to say hi to the brother, he just came home.
1:15:01Why you looking at dudes like, like, what are you getting out of? As soon as you hear that pop, pop, pop, all that niggas is gone. Yeah, that's a little bit different. Get on ground. Watch out. Watch out, mo. Get on. Watch out. Get on ground. You know that pop, pop, pop. Get it. That pop, pop, pop. Everybody gone. How about you hear the pap? Pap, pap. I seen niggas shoot at a nigga one time, one shotgun, two fucking nines, four fives. They was like having an OK corral. Pop, pop, boom. Pop, pop, boom. They nuts was hanging in the middle of the block. Nigga turned around and went, pat. With the.22, pat.
1:15:39That's just that bing, bing, bing. Niggas dove underneath cars. It was no more, yeah, raw. It's a different thing when you shooting at somebody who ain't got the hammer. the nigga turned around with the smallest caliber gun and said back! Niggas like ah! Diving underneath the cars and shit they don't want that shit back! You remember back in the day them.22s? Oh yeah it's a different story when somebody's shooting back at you. They don't want that. Yeah it's hard. Everybody think when you're shooting back at you Just like the catch up. The catch up? Where the catch up at? Let me tell you a cold story.
1:16:17I had a buddy That guy shot in the stomach. He had the shit pack. No flags for that. Take the flags back. He had a shit pack. Somebody shot him in the stomach. He had a shit pack. Didn't nobody know it, but he still taught karate. He was a karate teacher. Somebody did a back kick and kicked the bag. And the cash bag was... Bust this shit open. You know what the word was? You know what the word was? Shit. You know Master McGee got shit kicked out of him up here at the karate place. Master McGee got the shit kicked out of him. Kick the bag. Bag busted. I told a story on here. I got it. One of them Fat Joe imaginary stories.
1:17:00Let me tell you one of them Fat Joe imaginary stories. But Mayor was there. Well, I tell you, I beat up the karate nigga. They think because they know karate. You beat a karate nigga? Karate nigga used to come to school with the trophy every day, the moccasins. Them little black shoes with the red on the bottom. said some wild shit to me. I said, yo, my man, who the fuck you talking to? Karate? He was like, yo, we, you know, nigga, I beat him up. The karate nigga, that shit don't work in the streets. Yeah. The karate shit do not work in the streets. Grab your foot. I've never seen a guy bust out karate to be honest with you.
1:17:36I know that's for like discipline or whatever, but I've never seen nobody bust out the have you ever seen somebody run out there? Yo, what's up, nigga? What's good? What's good? And he started like, what the way? Can I tell you who'll fuck you up? Can I tell you who'll fuck you up with a suit on? The fucking, the nation of Islam will fuck you up with a suit on. Nigga, I don't doubt that. You be like, God damn, nigga. I'm talking about style, everything. Vests, nigga. And then help you up, brother. You need to get your life together, brother. Yeah, get your life together, brother. Brother, we could teach you some lessons.
1:18:15Yeah, brother, get on up. Don't ever make me do that to you again, brother. In the name of Allah, brother, stand on up. Get on up out here. That's right. That's right. That's right. I'm with that shit. If you ever do an event. No, I don't want to do an event. I know the nation of Islam. You talking to the wrong guy. I know the nation of Islam. Shout out my brother Arthur 4X. Now he the biggest one in the game. I know all of them. Yeah, yeah. Mustafa and yeah. Brother Nuri and all them. See, now I'm going to tell you something about the Nation of Islam. If you ever do anything around black people, always call them.
1:18:53Because what they do is they have the ability to neutralize color people. I'm serious. Yeah, they do. I don't know what it is about them. I don't give a damn. And I live in L.A. That Crips and blood shit, if you bring them around each other, they're going to fight and kill each other. But when the nation of Islam is there, I don't know what it is. It's almost like caretakers for the niggas in the streets. I'm serious. It's like babysitters. They like babysitters for ignorant motherfuckers. Because you know what? When you got somebody. An ignorant motherfucker just calm down when they see that time.
1:19:30When you got somebody who takes people and transform them and give them jobs and fucking do positive for their people. and they was just like you, you respect them off rip. The respect level is all about everything in life is the respect. Have you ever stole something from Models? Well, I ain't steal nothing from the nation of Islam, not a bean pie or nothing, bro. Models, man. Models. Have you ever stole something from Models? I stole stuff from a lot of places. I'm going to be honest with you.
1:20:05I stole from a lot of places. When you was hungry, man. I got my ass whooped for stuff. When you was hungry. Hungry like a motherfucker. We used to play spades in the hood. Where did y 'all go swimming at? Katona pool. Katona pool. We didn't have no pool. And you was hungry as hell when you was done eating. Katona pool? Right. Let me tell you something. After you go swimming, you be hungry as a motherfucker. If you play spades, whoever lose spades got to go to the bodega and steal. You be like, yo, I want some sweet salt and vinegar chips. I want some Chef Boyardee. then they tell you to steal the ice cream.
1:20:40You got to steal the ice cream in front of Poppy. You will get your ass whooped. Right? So, but we had to, that was the shit. If you lost the spades game, you got to go in there and steal whatever's on the list and come back with it. When they do catch you, you getting your ass whooped. Like, whooped. Like, I've been in places where they'll beat the brakes off you for stealing some shit. And then they won't put you in jail. Yeah. They'll just whip your ass. Did you ever see Jeff Redd when you was a kid? You ever heard of Jeff Redd? Hell yeah, I see Jeff Redd all the time. That's a player, ain't it, man?
1:21:16That's right, my man. Old school Jeff Redd used to sing. That was from Mount Vernon. What was the song he sang? You don't know Jeff Redd. I called... You called me from the night. It was Andre Harrell's, one of his first artists. Yeah, his first artists. What about Tee LaRocque? Did you ever meet him? I know Tee LaRocque. Let me tell you about Tee LaRocque. Let me tell you about Tee LaRocque. commentating, illustrating, description, giving. Let me tell you something. He still comes to my store and shops. Wow. Like, he ain't a bum. They used this song, bro. So many people used this song. Teela Rock was ahead of time.
1:21:53He come to my store. You know who else? R.L. from Nex. Whenever he in town, he come drop$4 ,000 or$5 ,000 in the store. I could tell you. Where's the store in Miami? No, we got three stores up here. The Bronx, Harlem, and Washington Heights. They just sold me a 10 and a half and a 8 and a half. I went in and I said, tell her, man. They had to meet a quota. I won't be going to your store, sir. Yo, Mike. I appreciate that. Yo, Mike, up on my seat. I was just thinking about going. Yo, Mike, and I go there. They had to meet the quota. I said, yo, I need 10 pairs of Tim sold today. They sold Kiss the size 12 and a 8 and a half.
1:22:32That's the oldest. You know what? I blame you. I blame you. You shouldn't have got God like that. When he told me that shit, I knew it wasn't a mistake. He told me that shit, I went like this. He flipped the box up. That shit said... When he told me that shit, I said, damn. But they did it. The kids, I call a nigga FaceTime. They over there laughing and shit. I said, yo, this kiss is my partner, man. How y 'all going to do it? Fucking kiss. It used to be... They act like I have this one big leg. You know what I'm saying? you had the Abraham was there any girl that you wanted and you couldn't get when you wasn't famous and when you got famous you kind of went looking and when you seen her you couldn't believe you wanted her you know I don't want to lie to you guys I never had a confidence problem so even since I was a young nigga I always had I thought I was the shit and I would go into the spot and I would rap to the baddest even when you was fat fat fat Joe fat fat Joe was walking around thinking he was Prince Charming, my nigga.
1:23:38Like, are you kidding me? I never had a confidence problem. I own the name Fat Joe since I'm fucking three years old. Hey, Fat Joey. I never thought I was like, I'm walking out there with the best in them. I got green eyes. I'm fly. Smell good. Army jacket. I ain't give a fuck. I'm proud of you. I'm happy for you. For real, man. Bear Timms, you in trouble. I'll tell you one thing. They used to want to whip my ass out there. Why? because I always had the baddest chicks so what I'm telling you is and I was the most ignorant ghetto nigga you ever seen in the history of mankind like I'd be like I had this one girl and the whole neighborhood want to kill me over and I'd be like yo was you mad you was fat such and such come down niggas is tight like they mad you even talking to now niggas is looking at me like yo it's a movie did they make you fat mad because you was fat?
1:24:36I used to drive around the Bronx and Harlem with no shirt on and 10 chains in the Jeep with the top off. I never gave a fuck about me. The girl from SWV, Coco. Coco from SWV. She from my projects. She tell me all the time, yo, I'm no fat, fat Joey. No shirt on in the summer. Don't give a fuck. I never gave a fuck. I never looked at it as a disability. No drawers on, nothing. I ain't saying that. No drawers on. Just shorts, crack his ass, gold chain. Don't mind. I'm not saying that. You know you ain't had no drawers on, man, under them basketball shorts, man. You know you ain't had no drawers on up under them basketball shorts, man.
1:25:17You know you had them Knicks shorts on with no drawers on up on them. Sweaty. Stuck on the motherfucking Bronx, on the FDR, sweating. Went 10-10 on, chest hot. This ain't that, man. This the biggest in the fucking game, you hear me? Yo, listen, listen, yo, Mike. Yo, Mike, I don't give a fuck, Mike. Like, listen. Fat Joe, Fat Joe. I've never been scared. I've never been unconfident. You're right, because you have a beautiful wife. Oh, my God, listen. You have a beautiful wife. And I'm not going to lie, when I first seen y 'all together, I was like, how the fuck did he get her? Hey, I got up broke, too.
1:26:03I was broke like this big. I don't give a fuck, man. I never gave a fuck. You know what? She must have seen that you was going to lose the weight one day. Nah! She said, I'm going to get a good Joe out of this nigga one day. She would have to be a scientist to predict the Ozempic was coming out. She would have to be a fucking fortune teller to predict, yo, one day there'll be a drug called Ozempic. He'll lose weight. This old Zepic shit out of control, huh? And these niggas made everybody mad at Puffy. I was like, the locks made everybody like, why don't he leave them niggas alone? Let them go.
1:26:43God damn. Let them go. They were smothering you, man. And then by the time you got on that versus, it was like vindication. It was like, damn. What about when they start hitting animals with those Zepic? What, to go get skinnier? Animals? It's to hit them with. Listen, let me tell you something. They need Olympic. They need to change that shit for liquor, too, and whatever. You know how many fat niggas I knew got shot and survived for being fat? Yeah, me too. My buddy got hit about 12 times. The doctor told niggas the same shit. Yo, if you ain't have this fat, you wouldn't have survived right now.
1:27:26You would have died. But let me tell you something. They died fat niggas. It said that Ozempic is a transforming drug. That shit saving lives. Like, you know, they trying to get that, give that shit up for cheap. You know that, right? Because you know what I was thinking about. Because you know, that saved so many lives. All of this stuff is linked together. Like, when you think about, I mean, like, people are really, really upset with Trump. But if you really, really think about it, if you think about the whole grand scheme of things, what he's taking away from people is really a trickle effect of unhealthy shit.
1:28:04Yeah. The food stamps, I know nobody is, I've never seen nobody spend no food stamps on Whole Foods. I heard they accept them, but I ain't never seen nobody pull none out at the fucking cash register. It ain't enough for that. Well, you got people. Because the place is a healthy place to eat. I think people buy Cheetos and bullshit with, and I'm just saying this for black people. I know motherfuckers get mad, Spanish, but black people they said there's more white people on food stamps than black people it may be but black people let the fucking shit go I'm tired of seeing three generations of mothers on fucking food stamps it's over with let them take that you taking away from food stamps let that be guess what this is the start of I don't need that shit no more I'm gonna tell you something cause I was there when food stamps came out the projects and food stamps they came out in our era.
1:28:58They temporary. They should have been temporary. So what happens when you're stuck in the projects? Everybody thinks they're paying cheap. Yes. But it stops you from getting a good job of competing or becoming a real boss. So all this shit is gimmick, it's systemic to hold you back from competing. You know what I'm saying? But I'm not. I'm not. There are some people that really need it. There are some people that need it. There are some people that really need it. I'm not saying the people who worked all their life don't need it. Now they're old. They need some food stamps or whatever the case may be.
1:29:29I get on single parent moms. The pops don't give a fuck. They need that food. And you know that at the time we needed them food stamps. Really came in handy for me, man. So it's like I'm going to buy some now. I got a plug. Or I'll take you up to the safe house. They start selling Lucy's I sit out there in the parking lot. You bring the groceries out. The Lucy's. But you know what? It's time for everybody get healthy. It's time for everybody to be independent. It's time for everybody to work for their future. If you're dependent on these things for too long, you're out the game. And think about the potential.
1:30:06I grew up in the projects. Jay-Z grew up in the projects. We grew up eating the worst shit ever. But imagine if Jay-Z would have said, yo, I want food stamps. I don't want to compete. I don't want to show how smart I am. I don't want to show him I'm a genius. I'm cool with the$100 rent. Then all this shit went down. Hold on stamps? I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. That's what you said. What I'm saying is the environment we came up on. You said imagine hold Jay-Z on stamps. I have family members who told me I have family members. I have family members spending the stamps with their same lab.
1:30:45I have family members who told me they don't want to be they want their stamps. I can't imagine it. I got family members who told me, yo, all we want is the stamps. We don't care. I rent this, pay this, this, that. Yo, but don't you want to go to college? Don't you want to get ahead? Don't you want to, nah, I'm comfortable here. I've literally, I swear to God, I have family members who don't want to be nothing more but then on Section 8. You know why, Joe? Because the responsibility is too great. The most, the scariest thing in the world is responsibility. and people don't understand that you can manage it but you gotta manage your personal life too people don't know all of it's connected you drinking water you're being healthy all of this is connected to you being responsible that's right and that responsible connected to you being a businessman that responsible connected to you you missing one link out of that motherfucker ain't nothing ever gonna work you got to cover every base of that and that's what and they don't teach the kids that they tell the motherfucker go do one of them and don't teach the other three of them with guys in jail there's a lot of guys wash your ass first I've been out too long I gotta catch a case and go back in there cause they don't wanna pay your house wash your butt this ain't that that ain't this this cracking kids got stuff make some noise for Mike Atchard that was hot right there man we really
1:32:23What if your soda actually did something for you? Introducing Sky Pop Protein Soda. With 10 grams of complete protein, zero sugar, and 45 calories, Sky Pop Protein Soda offers four delicious flavors with big taste and real benefits. Light, refreshing, and ready for wherever your day takes you. It's anytime protein that helps you reach higher. Sky Pop Protein Soda. Reach for the sky. Get your Sky Pop protein soda now at Target, Walmart, or Kroger. And now, Superhuman Shack. I keep telling them not to say that. I'm no superhuman. Believe it or not, I struggle with moderate obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA.
1:33:04In adults with obesity, moderate to severe OSA is a condition where breathing is interrupted during sleep with loud snoring, choking, gasping for air, and even daytime fatigue. Let's just say it can sound a lot like this. sound familiar learn more at don't sleep on osa.com this information is provided by lily a medicine company lots of places can expose you to identity theft that's why lifelock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second for threats to your identity which is way more than anyone can do on their own if we find anything suspicious like new loans or changes to your financial accounts, we alert you right away.
1:33:43All through text, phone, email, or the LifeLock app. Save up to 30 % your first year. Visit LifeLock.com slash iHeart. Terms apply. And now, another appliance triumph from your friends at Grand Appliance. Meet Jan. Her fridge died days before a dinner party, but she didn't panic. I just called my guy at Grand Appliance. He recommended a large capacity GE profile option with fingerprint resistant stainless steel and a convertible middle drawer. I can optimize for meat, beverages, snacks or wine. Best of all, it was in stock and they delivered next day. Another crisis averted by Grand Appliance.
1:34:21Shop GrandAppliance.com to learn more. Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
From the publisher
Fat Joe and Jadakiss are joined by legendary actor and comedian Mike Epps. The 'Def Comedy Jam' star tells Joe and Jada all about his years in Brooklyn coming up in the comedy scene, being the first guest with N.O.R.E. on Drink Champs, his 'We Them One's Comedy Tour' with 85 South's Karlous Miller, DC Young Fly, and Chico Bean, the final season of his Netflix show 'The Upshaws' with Wanda Sykes, his upcoming film with Kevin Hart, and why Dave Chappelle ISN'T in his all-time standup comedy top five alongside legends like Richard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, and Martin Lawrence. They also kick back and trade hilarious stories about Jay-Z, DMX, Big Pun, Tracy Morgan, and more from their experiences in 1990s New York City.
5:00 - Hilarious stories from childhood & '90s NYC
17:30 - '90s standup grind with Tracy Morgan
21:15 - Biggest artists Fat Joe has worked with
27:00 - Why Mike Epps didn't make a lot of friends in comedy
37:30 - We Them One's Comedy Tour
45:00 - Upcoming projects with Kevin Hart, Wanda Sykes
50:30 - Comedy Mt. Rushmore
58:00 - Hip Hop Museum
1:02:30 - First guest on Drink Champs
1:13:30 - DMX stories
1:24:30 - Fat Joe never struggled with confidence
[Timestamps may vary due to advertisements.]
All lines provided by Hard Rock Bet
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
