Josh Widdicombe breaks up with... HIMSELF??

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2:00Josh Widdicombe:You have got quite a unique voice. I know, yeah. Is that your actual voice? Of course it fucking is. I wouldn't choose it. What? Are you prepared to let go of this obsession with nostalgia and start living in the here and now? No, it's too profitable to my career. I think the Beatles is the best, most important thing that's ever happened to humanity. That is fucking ludicrous. Ludicrous what has just come out. Ludicrously accurate, brother. Are you ready to break up with the past? Yeah, I suppose so, yeah. Bring out 90s Josh, please. Oh, no. Oh, wow. I didn't have that much bum fluff, I'll tell you that.

2:43Hello and welcome to my office. This is Joe Marla. We'll see you now with me, Dr. Joe Marla. This is the show where I mine deep into the heads of celebrities and try to escape before I've done more harm than good. With me, as always, is my trusty assistant, Jake. Jakey, how are you, boy? Joey, how are you today? Ah, I'm sorry. I said Jakey. Yeah, you don't like Joey? I'm not. Does it remind you of being a baby kangaroo? Is that why you don't like it? Wow, that's the same pose you do for George Galloway. When you do your impression, I've gone. George Galloway's this. Would you like me to be the cat?

3:23Whereas when you flip it like that, it's... Boing. Little Joey. Do you like Jakey? I don't like Joey. I do from the... If I know someone quite well, I like Jakey. My mum used to call me Jakey Wakey. Always have a soft spot for that nickname. Jake the Snake... Only in the mornings though, surely. Jakey Wakey. Yeah, or... Well, actually, it wasn't really like an instruction Jakey Wakey. It was just like, hey, here he is, Jakey Wakey. Yeah. That is shit. Oh, well, thanks for sort of tarnishing a core childhood memory of mine. Oh, by the way, that thing you held really close to your heart about your mum, it's shit.

4:01It's shit. I'm sorry. I like being nostalgic, actually. I'm sorry. I like being nostalgic. Yeah, why not? Do you get nostalgic? Not you as well. So you don't like looking back on stuff and being like, oh, I love those bands. I love those TV shows. Kids TV. Do you not look back at kids TV and think, oh, it was fun? Pat Sharp, Fun House. Yeah. I'll go with that. Bernard's Watch, remember that one? Queen's nose Queen's nose these Bernard's watch I loved because I would like fantasise about what I would do with the what he the power to stop time do you know what he did? well you remember because you watched it do the hoovering oh my mum oh my mum's telling me to do the hoovering I haven't done it I'll stop time and do that that's all he would do well good because it stopped him getting in trouble yeah I know but come on why haven't you done your chores boy?

4:43you're 11 you're 11, 12 years old you can stop time like what would you do? you can't drive you can't drive even if you go oh well no it's going to stop you because time well you haven't learnt You can't drive. You can't fly because you've stopped everyone else from making you fly. You can nick stuff. You can nick loads of your favourite fast food from a fast food shop. Well, you can't because it's not cooked. Because you've paused time. Stopping time, you're restricted because you stop everything else from being able to work. It's quite a lonely place to be. Burnley was probably very lonely. And that was what the message was actually about.

5:12It was about we come into this world alone, we live our lives alone, and we leave the world alone. And that is why it's such a profound bit of TV. And it really underrated. It didn't get us enough awards. But you did hint that we do have a guest who might be quite into nostalgia. Yeah, well, we do, don't we? Can you do it? He's obsessed. Can you tell our listeners? Shall I tell them without telling them? Tell them with a voice. Oh, well, hello. My name's... No, you do it. I can't do it. Well, I'm here and I'm very happy to be here. And I'm very good to... It's Josh Willicom. it's Josh Ridicom yeah top top comedian top comedian if you don't know him from his stand up you'll know him from his podcasting if you don't know him from his podcasting you'll know him from the TV if you don't know him from the TV then you will probably not know him you might not know him but you'll still enjoy the episode because my god he's a talent and a half yeah Josh is a bit of a pop culture obsessive you are part of it now what do you mean?

6:13you are part of the pop culture now I don't think everyone has a massive podcast like you No, but everyone has... Not everyone's on the wheel, mate. Everyone goes... What do you mean everyone's... What are we talking about? Oh, if you're a significant... Not everyone goes and has dinner with Nick Grimshaw on a podcast, do they? Have you become that much of a diva that you think, oh, this is just what everyone does? You thought, like, everyone gets a date in their calendar where they go for dinner with Nick Grimshaw. Yeah, no, really well played. I think Josh has spent enough time in Janet's waiting room.

6:45Should we get him in? I would love that, yeah. Janet release the beast send in Josh Widdicom please thank you

6:59Josh Widdicom everybody hello

7:03Josh Widdicombe:how are you hi Josh welcome thank you for having me thank you for coming I like Janet she's nice isn't she is she yeah this is Jake I'm fully aware of who Jake is Oh. Sorry, I should have actually told you, we've got a bit of a shared past. Before you were my boss, Josh was my boss. Quite surprised when I saw him turn up on this and I hadn't been asked to be a referee for him. That was an interesting turn of events. Yeah, this is interesting for me now. How are you, though? I'm very good, actually. Yeah, good. We always get our patients slash clients slash guests because we're not sure legally what to say.

7:45Yeah, fine. or what to be able to call you to fill out the intake questionnaire. Did I just kick your leg then? You're trying to alpha me.

7:59Is that what's going on then?

8:00Josh Widdicombe:Is it working? It is a little bit, yeah. Yeah, I thought it might be. A little bit ruffled. Right, full name please. Josh Michael Whittacombe. Star sign. Aries. Hmm. What does that mean? It's the Ram. What parts of you are ram-like? What personality or physically? It's your question. My woolly hair. Pardon? My woolly hair, my slightly curly hair. Forgive me, I heard willy hair. Oh sorry, not my willy hair. No wonder you looked surprised. Occupation. Chomedian. First comedian we've had in for a session that is just straight up gone, I'm funny. No, I didn't say that. I said I'm a comedian. I think that a lot of people, you feel embarrassed by it, so you have to pretend to be bashful.

8:51Josh Widdicombe:But the truth is, I am a comedian. Really? That's why I'm sat here. And what's the definition of comedian? Someone that's done at least six mock-the-weeks. Biggest pet peeve? Oh, my word. This is more of an opinion one, isn't it? The others were quite easy, because they were just facts. What's the biggest pet you've got? Our oldest cat. What sort of cat is it? It's a Siberian. Tiger?

9:23Favourite decade?

9:25Josh Widdicombe:The 90s, though I've OD'd on it a bit, so I'm going back to the 80s a bit more with my interests. Right, okay. What year were you born? How old were you? 83. So that makes you... 42. 42? You've got such lovely skin. Thank you. Actually, thick hair. You've got thick hair as well. I've had mine done. Have you? Yeah. Oh. Well, why didn't you keep the rest of it then?

9:56Josh Widdicombe:When was the last time you cried? Do you know what? I think it was when I misjudged coming down off antidepressants and went too fast. You didn't do the tapering? Well, I'm now back up to 10 milligrams. Really? Yeah. But I was on 20. yeah but uh and what is it i'm on no i tell a pram that's what i'm on okay here we go here we go there we go what what milligrams are you on i'm on 20. are you yeah and i've experienced that before where yeah because it takes a while to build up for it to kick in doesn't it yeah be taking it for a while and then you seem to sort of level out and then you're on it and then you're meant to taper off but there was so often especially early doors when i was struggling with it all i was like i feel much better yeah yeah of course i'm not lying on the hill anymore they're gone yeah the come down is hard so what happened to me i don't know when it was about six months ago was i was ill and it meant i forgot to take them for three days and then i got better physically but i was in a dark place so i just was crying for no reason so that's that's the answer that one oh wow thank you for sharing that as well it's all right it's so um i think more people should talk about it because i think it's a really normal thing well it's complete and i was really worried about taking them because i thought there was so much stigma attached to it i thought it was a weakness in taking them so did i and i thought it meant i'd do this on my set i could do this totally using my own mind totally to actually fix my broken mind yeah it doesn't I was like, what if it makes me not me?

11:34Josh Widdicombe:And I was like, but me is really sad. Oh, thank you. I really appreciate that. Biggest fear? Obviously, like, things that would be the worst are like being tortured or at war or something like that. Yeah. But that's not something that takes my day up. so really the actual fears that grip me are mundane and probably vain so they are stuff like just career fear, constant career fear they're the things that consume me but I mean I'd rather my career disappeared than I was tortured in Iraq

12:18Josh Widdicombe:she's got to choose one if I had to choose but that doesn't consume me I very rarely think about Guantanamo Bay. So the thing that consumes me would be it all going away. But even after doing it for so long at such a high level... Not as bad as it was. Right, OK. But still there. It's still there. What would happen if it did all go away? I think it would be fine. The truth is... Would your wife and kids still love you? I don't know if they do as it is, John. It's such a sort of question of like, well, I hadn't even considered that was an option until you searched that. And now there's a whole new level of fear about this unlocked.

12:58Josh Widdicombe:Tell me a secret. Good question. One of the side effects of eschatolopram. Oh. I know you're interested. Yeah. It's more difficult to ejaculate. That's not a secret, though. That's on Google, mate. I know, but people don't discuss that. And I basically wanted to see what your reaction would be to saying it. what oh don't tell people that no no whether you that's something you found yeah yeah tell me then you're like fucking hell what's going on here then

13:33do you know what I really like what that you have just come on here and properly I go for it

13:41Josh Widdicombe:comfortable enough to open up I think it's better to just go I've decided in the last few years just to go for it on these things great it's going to bite me on the arse one day. Oh, definitely. Definitely. And I'll be right there beside you. Neither of you coming.

14:06Right. Let me get this straight. Yeah. You are a pop culture obsessive. Yeah. Is that right?

14:13Josh Widdicombe:Yeah. But particularly pop culture of the past. Yes. You've alluded to it, the 90s now you've sort of OD'd on the 90s you want to go into the 80s I dip my toe into the 70s and I certainly dip into the 60s Really? That's ages ago Yeah but I think I think the Beatles is the best most important thing that's ever happened to humanity Right I'm sorry we just need to take a moment That is fucking ludicrous what has just come out of my mouth. Ludicrously accurate, brother. I'm with Joss on that. The Beatles are one of the most overrated things. Oh, what a boring take, Joe. It's not a fucking boring take, is it?

15:01The boring take is they're the best thing ever to come out of this country. Are you taking a piss?

15:04Josh Widdicombe:Not this country. Earth. Bollocks. Name one fucking thing that was good. What, about the Beatles? Yeah. I just feel with the position he set out, he'll find that quite easy. Yeah.

15:19I feel like that would be the challenge would be that would be for you but I mean he's going to find that quite there's not a single song that you go oh that was decent are you high? no they were fucking high thinking the music was good I just think there's too much mate there's so much there's so much there's better music way better music out there I honestly think the Beatles and I I will always love you

15:51Josh Widdicombe:there's one is that the Whitney Houston version or the Dolly Parton one? what do you mean? remember that song? Dolly Parton did nine to five she did do that yeah and then she did Jolene Jolene Jolene Jolene anyway let's not so a little bit of egg on your face two out of the three songs you've just sung there were written by Paul McCartney from the Beatles. What? Whoa. Sorry, what? And such is the power of the Beatles. I can make something up like that and it could be true. And that is the proof that the Beatles are just so incredible. It's so true, Jake. So true. Really well played. Yeah, really good.

16:34That was fantastic. Anyway, back to you, Josh, and away from the Beatles.

16:39Josh Widdicombe:Yeah, if we must. You like old TV shows, old toys, old adverts. You've even got a podcast called Josh Whittacombe's Museum of Pop Culture. Correct. Now, museums don't have modern shit in, do you? So is it accurate to say that you're sort of living in the past? You're obsessed with the past? Culturally, yes. It is a problem. It's an obsession? Yeah. Are you prepared to let go of this obsession with nostalgia and start living in the here and now? No, it's too profitable to my career.

17:12Maybe we should shift it to appreciating the present in equal balance then. Well, unfortunately for you, Josh, we're going to see if we can change your mind.

17:23Josh Widdicombe:Are we going to put personal growth above financial? Definitely. We're here to let go. I don't like that idea, but let's see. It's okay not to be okay. Okay. As they said in a non-Beatles song. Yeah. It was actually Daniel Beddenfield, I believe. What was it? One of the greatest songwriters of our generation. It's the fifth Beatle. And in the words of him, we've got to get through this. so oh here we go first of all I want to know exactly what the Museum of Pop Culture is it's a podcast sure where I like the kind of podcast where it's long stories over a few episodes like Rest is History or Uncanny or Real Dictators or ones like them but they're all quite highbrow I presume there'll be one for pop culture because I like those stories we all watch like the Robbie Williams doc or the Pamela Anderson doc or the kind of Martha Stewart doc or all those docs that were on Netflix or the boy bands one.

18:23Josh Widdicombe:But there isn't a podcast that deals in these stories in a funny way. So I presume there would be, there wasn't, so I've made it. Reading through some of the things that you discuss on your podcast, what's this about David Hasselhoff bringing down the Berlin Wall? So David Hasselhoff, do you think there's a kind of misguided belief that he sung on the top of the Berlin Wall as it came down? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, are you aware of that? Yeah. Is he German? No, but he had a hit with a song called Freedom that was a big hit in East and West Germany. David Hasselhoff genuinely believes he played a part in the fall of the Berlin Wall.

19:04Josh Widdicombe:And he's on record as saying that. As in he helped it actually come down? Well, that he played a role in the... Uniting East and West. The uniting East and West. He performed on a cherry picker above the Berlin Wall on New Year's Eve the year it fell, but he didn't perform on the Berlin Wall. What's your obsession with Mr. Blobby? Well, I'm not obsessed with him, but it was the... Seems like you are. Does it? Yeah. Talk about him a lot. I just think he's one of the great underrated cultural phenomenon of my lifetimes. All right, this, thank you for coming out with that, because that really helps support my argument when you come out with a statement like, the Beatles are the greatest thing.

19:55Josh Widdicombe:Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! So, I really, really appreciate that. Can I defend Mr. Blobby? Yes, sure. Okay, so... Blobby, blobby. Yeah, that's good. Blobby, blobby, blobby. Yeah, although it's slightly like you're doing an impression of me doing an impression of Mr. Blobby. You have got quite a unique voice. I know, yeah. Is that your actual voice? Yeah, of course it fucking is. I wouldn't choose it. Anyway, defending Mr. Blobby. So he started on Noel's house party as a one-note joke to kind of wind up celebrities. People loved him because he was a kind of agent of chaos that would come in and destroy everything and he'd undermine celebrities and he didn't give a shit and he'd smash stuff up.

20:40Josh Widdicombe:But then he got too big. He had a number one single. He had a string of theme parks. The New York Times described him as everything that's wrong with a country gone soft in the head. What? Yeah. Dare I say it? Yeah. Disruptor. Disruptor. We need these disruptors. In fact, weirdly enough, On the Blobby thing... Are you comparing me to Blobby? As a compliment. When they were doing Clash of the Comics and they needed Joe to come on and bang James Acast... Oh, fuck off, Jake! We found out when Russell Howard was on, he let slip what his producer did, that when they needed someone to bash James Acast around their head with a tray on Clash of the Comics, Joe got the job but very nearly lost out to Blobby.