Meet Holiday Happy Activist Lindsay Morehead-Oates

0:03Thank you for joining us for episode 550 of Live Happy Now. The holiday season is a season of generosity and reflection, and a time when we're reminded to look beyond ourselves and think of others. And that's exactly what this week's guest is here to talk about. I'm your host, Paula Felps, and this week you're going to meet Lindsay Morehead-Oates, a graphic designer from Dallas, Texas, and a happy activist who decided to kick off the holiday season by brightening the lives of others. Let's have a listen. Lindsay, thank you so much for joining me on the show this week. Thank you for having me. I am really, really excited for our audience to meet you.

0:40You're doing some very cool things. And on Live Happy Now, we talk a lot about how good volunteering is for us, but that's not why people start doing it. So tell me a little bit about you. Tell me about your background. What made you first get involved in volunteering? Like how old were you and how did that part of it come about? I think this would almost go back to whenever I was very young. My mom and me used to always do the angel tree. And I liked the idea of like picking a kid and then we'd go shopping for them and get them clothes, get them toys, like try to fill their wants and their needs that they needed.

1:17And it just always kind of brought me joy to do that every year. It was something that we looked forward to. I've always had a passion for animals. I mean, as far back as I can remember, we've always had multiple animals. I've always had a passion for animals because then I do like to help people, but maybe I'm a sucker more for animals than I am for people. But I've tried to venture more back into helping individuals now. But there for the longest time, I then turned around and started volunteering with rescues. I did some pro bono work design-wise for them. And then I'd also help out at events, try to like load up stuff.

1:57I fostered there for a little bit, but then I kind of got out of there and started focusing more on work again. But then I hopped back in when I met one of my family members and didn't realize that she worked at a wildlife refuge. Oh, wow. So I've currently been volunteering and I just got voted a board member there. it's called Pride Rock Wildlife Refuge in Terrell, Texas. They literally have lions, tigers, bears, hyenas, other types of animals. But yeah, so I've been out there. I've met the different animals. As I do it, I'll have no problem going and getting my hands dirty. So what is it that makes you so willing to give of your time?

2:42We all live in a very busy world and I know that you stay very busy with your design work. What is it that drives you to keep finding time, making time and giving that time to animals and people who need it? I guess just knowing that I'm grateful for the position that I'm in, I realized that I have a roof over my head. I have a car that gets me from point A to point B. I have a job that helps pay my bills. And there are other people that are in need more than me. And I guess I have a big heart. I just feel the need to want to help out whenever I can. I guess I've always just kind of been somebody that's like, oh, you need an extra hand.

3:27I'll come help. No big deal. Do you think that goes back to picking the angel off the tree and shopping for children? Or was it also something, was your family, was that instilled in you as you were growing up that you help others? Or because you are very, very giving. You're doing a lot. Yeah, I guess it was the whole like treat others how you want to be treated was a big thing that I was always instilled with. And then my father always tried to instill in me like there were other people in the world and realized that just because we live in this little bubble here, that there is a lot more out there than you think.

4:04And he always tried to make sure that I was well-informed with the world, to know what was going on, know our history, and just tried to instill in me. And then work ethic is always, I want to say almost that that probably helped drive it too, is because to a Gen Xer of a parent and a boomer of a parent, they were very, like you, you had to have that work ethic. You had to be there, give the extra mile, do the extra effort. And I don't know, I guess just keeping that in mind, like I always, work is satisfying, but definitely giving back feels a lot better. So talk about that. What do you get out of giving to others?

4:47Like happiness and warmth, I guess. I don't know how to explain it. It just kind of brings me joy to help people. You think that there would be some like grand purpose to it or something. I just enjoy it. Like after I did the Thanksgiving meal, I just felt so warm and happy. And I just enjoy that feeling of knowing that like I made somebody else's day. You know, it's more than just a day. You're making a difference that's going to last for a while. I want to talk to you about the Thanksgiving dinner that our listeners don't yet know about. So you had told me that this had been a dream of yours for a while.

5:26So tell us, first of all, what you did, and then let's kind of get the backstory on that. So what I ended up doing this year was me and my best friend cooked three turkeys. We did dressing. We basically made a full Thanksgiving meal and prepped it, made 50 plates out of like little clamshells, did cookies, rolls, and then got water and went around in the South Dallas area and handed out meals to anybody that we pulled up to different places that seemed to have a congregation of people and just kind of asked people if they wanted a nice meal. And a bunch of people came up. They were definitely really willing.

6:12And then we just tried to keep driving around and finding people. We found these couple that was sitting on a bus stop. They were really sweet. He actually let us know that he had no fruit in his fridge. He was grateful to be able to take that home with him whenever he got home. And it was just kind of warmed my heart. It was sweet. It was incredible to me that you would take this, not just the time that it takes to go out and deliver all this, but to go out, put the whole thing together, all the cooking, everything that goes into it, that is no small feat. So how did you and your best friend start having this discussion?

6:47How did it go from something that you had always wanted to do to then y 'all talk about it to then boom, it happened? Can you kind of walk us through that? Yes. So we've talked about it for years, honestly. The idea, I can't remember where it fully started, but it was like she grew up in South Dallas, is my best friend Shonda. And so she grew up around a lot of that, saw those type of people, knew the type of help that those individuals kind of needed. And I just felt like, I was like, well, you know what would be neat? We were sitting down eating Thanksgiving and it was like, we could cook another meal.

7:27We could do this. We could cook an extra meal. And she was like, yeah. And go like, hand it out. And I was like, yeah, we'll do that. And we've probably talked about it for three or four years now. And it was finally, I was like, you know what? I was like, this feels like the year. People are in need. Certain people have lost certain benefits. People have lost their homes and different things. And it just feels like it's kind of been a tougher year for just everybody in general. We decided that we were going to do it. I went to Sam's Club. I had my little membership. I went and bought turkeys and stuffing and all the fixings.

8:03We sat down one day and we were like, okay, we got to put a grocery list together. What are we cooking? I was trying to like, okay, we need seasonings. We need this. We need that. I had everything put together. But honestly, what was the most surprising is as big as it sounds like it was, between the shopping, the prepping and the cooking and delivering, maybe three days worth of work. Yeah. You know, I think in total to feed 50 people, I maybe spent$300. I don't even think you could go to McDonald's now at this point and buy enough meals to feed everybody. Because it wasn't like I just bought them burgers.

8:43Like we made a full meal. They had stuffing, cranberry sauce, turkey, fried cabbage, mashed potatoes and gravy, a roll. And then I made some of my homemade cookies that everybody loves at the holidays. So it was like, we made sure that we were going to feed them the same way that we'd feed ourselves. See, I love that because sometimes even when we're giving back to others, like we give them a little less than we would give to ourselves or to our family. You know, and I love that you took that approach of, if this is someone I'm having into my home to serve them dinner, this is what I would serve them.

9:20It's not like I'm just throwing a sandwich together and taking it out there. We'll be right back with more of Live Happy Now. If you've ever wished your brain had a switch you could flip to be more positive, we've got good news for you. It kind of does. Neuroscience tells us that you can actually train your brain to look for the good. And once you start practicing, it gets easier, faster, and a whole lot more fun. That's exactly why every Tuesday in our Live Happy Weekly Newsletter, we give you a quick little workout for your optimism muscles. The look for the good word search. It's a tiny puzzle with a big purpose.

9:57Every week, you hunt for words that spark gratitude, joy, resilience, all the good stuff your brain loves to build on. It takes just a couple of minutes, feels like a win, and gives your brain a gentle nudge toward noticing what's going right. Think of it as a microdose of positivity disguised as a game. So if you want to get better at seeing the bright spots, even on messy days, subscribe to our Live Happy weekly newsletter by visiting us at livehappy.com and play along with our Look for the Good word search. your brain will thank you.

10:32And now let's hear more from our happy activist, Lindsay Moorhead Oates. I love that. I love that you had that kind of concern. It wasn't like, eh, you know, it's good enough. You know, you didn't. You took this really to heart as really like these people, you were serving them. They were your guests and you were going to make sure it was a fantastic experience for them. Talk to me when you were pulling up and you would say, hey, do you want something to eat or however you did it? What was that first response? Because that's not what they're expecting. No. And I wasn't honestly sure what I was going to expect, like to just hop out of a car and be like, hi, like you don't know me or anything, but would you like food?

11:14And people were overwhelmingly me like very excited about it. Like one place people kept, I guess they were in the alleys or different places. And all it took was one of them to go like, Hey, somebody's got food. And every time somebody came up, bless you. Thank you so much. We greatly appreciate it. And you could tell like everybody just pretty much found a spot, sat down and started eating. And what I also love about this is that you weren't afraid. A lot of times people get nervous about going into areas that have a large homeless population and that sometimes holds people back from serving others.

11:55So what was it that just let you go, hey, let's like go down here because that's where they are? Well, I mean, and I'll admit I had nerves behind it because I didn't, you know, of course you You always hear people that'll make homeless people out to be scary individuals when really all they are is just like me and you. It's just they have fallen down on hard times. Things didn't pan out the way. And it really doesn't take much. Right. I mean, the sad part I always put it is all it would take is me to have one medical emergency and I'd probably be in the same situation. Yeah, there was a song a few years ago called A Very Thin Line by a woman named Natalie Archangel.

12:36and it talked about that, that exact thing where it's like, it is a very thin line between me and that person who doesn't have a bed to sleep in. And I think it's hard for us to think about that. And so maybe that's why we don't, but I think it is important for us to remember that, that there is a thin line that separates us and a certain twist of fate, things going just a little bit differently than planned. And we might be in those shoes. Yeah. I think one thing that also kind of shaped this is back in 2015, my apartment had caught fire and I lost everything that I had owned. And pretty much the only thing I had was my car and what was on my back.

13:16I was very, very blessed. I had a mother and father that lived by, that had no problem taking me back in and me moving back into my parents' house. Like that wasn't an issue. And I admit that I was extremely blessed to have that opportunity, but it also put into perspective that none of this really like fully mattered. I had three animals that I lost in the fire and that was, I would have traded anything to get them back over any type of substance or anything, but it really did. It put into perspective that it really doesn't take much. And then I I no matter how much sometimes like you get in your head and you almost have like those silly first world problems that make no real sense if you actually fully think about like what you're complaining about.

14:12My iPhone is too slow. Why is it moving? Oh my God, the Wi-Fi is lagging right now. And it's like, I do. I have to catch myself sometimes. You know what? You're grateful. You got a fridge full of food right now. You have a family that loves you. You have a home. You have a bed. just try to remind myself and ground myself that I am extremely grateful and why not give back? And that's something too, like, I feel like if I can give back, knowing that I'm not, I'm not rich, I don't make a shit ton of money, I run my own business. If I can do it, anybody can do it. And it doesn't have to be a huge gesture.

14:52I mean, it can be something small that we do, like meet them where we're at, like financially, whatever it is that we can do, that small amount makes a difference because it's also the intention behind it. I think people really recognize that too, that when it comes from a giving heart and when you're really doing it because you want to help someone else, just that intention means a lot to the people. I think making people smile too can go a very long way just to like brighten somebody's day. And that doesn't cost you anything. It doesn't cost you anything to be kind. And females, maybe I'm biased, but females, I'll be like, you look pretty today.

15:30I like that dress. Or you look cute. And that could bring somebody's whole day up by just letting them know, like, you look good today. Or just, I like your smile. Just something to bring some joy to somebody could really go very far. And it don't cost you a thing. And just for them to feel noticed. That's huge too. Making somebody feel noticed. We've gotten so much of, we're not even looking at other people. We don't even look at our loved ones, let alone strangers. Yes, because we're sitting there with our face in our phones and we don't see people. And when you do something like that and you make that gesture, that compliment, that goes so far to people.

16:10So you've done a lot of good already this holiday season. Do you have other things planned? Anything else up your sleeve that you're going to do? they don't have anything at the moment as far as a plan for a next like good deed I guess it just kind of randomly pops up that I'm like you know what we should do this this would be really nice yeah I know we really thought out the thanksgiving but sometimes my good deeds just kind of randomly come they present the opportunity and yeah jump on it yeah and so what would you say to someone who's listening and is like, man, that sounds cool, but it's too much work, or I don't know how to get started, or like, what would you say to anyone who's thinking of doing something like this for others?

16:56I feel like even starting small, the whole thought process that you couldn't do it, that's just you in your own head. You can do it. You can do anything you set your mind to. You could do whatever you want to do. Just set your mind to it and set it as a goal. Doing and giving back to people, though, is much easier than what it comes off to be. It really doesn't take a lot of money. First off, kindness is free. Right, right. Kindness is free. That doesn't take much to help somebody. If you see, even if it's a coworker or somebody that's down and just needs a hand, give them a hand. You know, if you want to help back with your community, try to see where maybe your community needs the extra help.

17:44If you live in a very small town like I do, you can go with a lot of the historical organizations are very good places to start. They love a good volunteer. And especially if you're young, oh, my God, the old ladies will absolutely love and adore you because you're the one that can go lift the tables and go set out all the chairs. They will put you in work. You know, old people will absolutely love and adore you for coming out and helping with that. And that's a big thing. The next generation really does need to help continue this along because you do have a lot of the older generation that spent their time donating.

18:27And if we can get some of the younger generation involved in this and be set up for their life to just continue to give back, that's a long way of going is getting somebody young to start just realizing that giving back is easy. You know, if you don't have the money for it, it's okay. You can find other ways. But you know, if you're blessed for a little bit, you got a little extra cash, like I did, why not? My bills are taken care of my stuff's taken care of. We're gonna have Thanksgiving dinner. I got this little extra money. Why not? I love that. I love it. I love your attitude. I love your approach.

19:05I love what you're doing. And I really appreciate you sitting down and talking with me about this. I think I'm just excited to see what you decide to do next. Thank you, Paula.

19:18That was Lindsay Moorhead Oates, our December happy activist, sharing how she's brightening the lives of others. If you know someone who's making the world a better place, We would love to hear about them. Email us at editor at livehappy.com and tell us who you think should be our next happy activist. That's editor at livehappy.com. That is all we have time for today. We'll meet you back here again next week for an all new episode. And until then, this is Paula Phelps reminding you to make every day a happy one.