Ep 615 - Slim Goodie (feat. Sheryl Underwood)

23:33I have not been in what I consider a long-term relationship because I can be quite reclusive. I like my alone time. Yeah, I'm similar with that. Yeah. I don't like to sit up with a man and watch sports with him because I'm not talking to him. I'm okay with that. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I'll tell you a story. So this dude I really, really liked, and rarely I let people come around where I live, right? So he was like, so what you doing tonight? What you want to do tonight? He said, I want to watch the fight. I said, why don't you swing by? So I got the fight ready, right? I said, what you want to eat? And I said, text me what you want to eat.

24:12So I got all the stuff he wanted and everything. And then on my side of the bed was a stack of newspapers and magazines. And on his side of the bed was everything he wanted to eat and everything. So he was like, so what you doing? I said, I'm shutting the fuck up so you can watch the fight. And he was like, so you don't want to talk? That's wonderful. Why the fuck am I talking to you? We're going to watch the fight. This is great. Yeah. And it didn't work? What's he doing? No, it didn't. Is he a dumbass? He wanted to talk? It didn't. But that's odd. I don't know why. Like, if we're watching. Okay, what's your favorite team?

24:44I saw all the shirts in. What's your favorite team? Well, it's Eagles and Notre Dame. Okay. Notre Dame football. Okay. Now, Kyle, tell them. I watch college sports. Yeah. when I'm not when I'm working I watch enough of it but when I'm not working Saturdays Saturdays for college football that's right I don't know what the fuck I'm looking at I just know I watch college sports hold on a second I watch college sports and when I was drinking I had my beer and my shit and my snacks but nobody's there with me nobody's there nobody's there nobody's there with me I'm just watching sports now I will text Jim Jim Kelly is my sports guru.

25:24Like when I watch Stanley Cup stuff. Yeah. And I go, Jim, my only question, how do they know where the hockey puck is? I can't see shit. Jim Kelly. Not the football. Okay. If I was that cool. I was like, I have a fun story. I would have told you that. I got a fun story about Jim Kelly. What? So I had to do a, the Super Bowl like two years ago, this guy, this rich guy asked me to go to this dinner and he wanted me to do stand up. But I was like, I don't know if I'm doing stand up. But we just went to this, like, steak dinner at this. It was, like, a long table, but it was just NFL Hall of Famers.

25:57So it was, like, for real, everybody. I was sitting next to Jerry Rice. It was, like, Jim Kelly, Shannon Sharp. It was – oh, Nate was there. Nate twerked.

26:09Who were you twerking for?

26:13Shane Gillis:It was a different mean thing you did to me. You called me a pedophile. Yeah, that's how I closed. so thankfully Jim Kelly led the table in prayer before because otherwise I had no material but it was just Jewish bankers and NFL Hall of Famers but they have senses of humor Jerry Rice is my fraternity brother I'm a member of Zeta Phi Beta he's a member of Phi Beta Sigma the only thing he laughed at was when I called Nate a pedophile then he lifted his head up and laughed and I'm sure you guys saw the Club Shaysha Club Shay Shay interview I did with him. No, I didn't see that. Oh, yeah. Shannon and I sat in a car for hours when he was playing in Denver.

27:00So I was in Denver. I think it was when they first opened, the first location of the improv. And what's the other guy? Is it Terrell Davis? Yeah, TD. Okay, so I thought Terrell Davis was Shannon, and Shannon was Terrell. So he was like, so what do you want to do after this? I said, I'm going to sell these CDs. Back then, I was sending CDs and cassette tapes and posters. So he was like, what do you want to do? I said, okay, I want to go on a carriage ride, right? Because I saw the horse outside. I want to go on a carriage ride. He said, come on, I'll take you. And this is Shannon talking to me, but I think it's Terrell.

27:29And so I go, okay, let me get this money right here. So he starts walking up these stairs of the club and goes, come on if you're coming. I said, who the fuck are you talking to? I said, I'm not these bitches in here. I don't give a fuck about you, motherfucker. He was like, I said, I was like, and I said, motherfucker, I'm already me. Right? Yeah. So anyway. That's great. Come on if you're coming. Come on if you're coming. Yeah. It was sexy. I got off on him when he said, come on if you're coming. I was like, ooh. Then I was like, wait a minute, bitch. Stand up for yourself. So I pack up my stuff after I sell stuff.

28:07Because even the white girls was like, he's telling you to come on. I was like, bitch, get a backbone. Yeah. What the fuck are you talking about? So we get in the car and we can't find the carriage ride. So we're sitting in the car for hours talking about what type of relationship we could or could not have. And fast forward to Club Shay Shay, where we've ever talked about it side by side. That's great. I was definitely wanting to be a Mrs. Shedden Sharp, but it wasn't meant to be. And we all stayed friends. This episode is brought to you by Mint Mobile. Sick of giving all your money to big wireless?

28:46Mint Mobile has high-speed data, unlimited talk, and text on the nation's largest 5G network. And it's$15 a month for the first three months. Like your money? Mint Mobile is for you. Shop plans at mintmobile.com slash drenched. Upfront payment of$45 for a three-month five-gigabyte plan required, equivalent to$15 per month. new customer offer for the first three months only full price plan options available taxes and fees extra see mint mobile for details you know that's awesome yeah that's what you would hope i mean every man i've been with i'm still friends with you know i'm like cool if they are live but you know i'm still i'm still friends i left those jokes there yeah you cannot tell you something can i tell you honestly and that's what i've been doing in the interviews is telling people listen if they had not come with respect and said, these are the topics.

29:41Yeah. But I didn't know what was going to be said. And I did not know that Tony was going to do the George Floyd joke. Yeah. But when he did it, like I was over there, like scribbling on paper and asking God, send me, send me the response. Send me the response, like the response to you. Send me the response, but I don't want to be mean spirited. but with Tony and the George Floyd joke my only feeling is if you don't have the right response that blows up the room even further you've set back the cause so sometimes it's say less if you ain't got nothing good to cut his throat with figuratively about comedy shut the fuck up because you're gonna make it worse in my opinion what do you think I agree I think that's I think you nailed it

30:27Shane Gillis:I feel like the so especially with the late husband talk. It was like this deeply personal, like a tragedy. And the thing no one talks about is horrific to even think about and to be up there and just like laughing and making a good joke. To me, it's like a triumph where you rose above it. You made a big joke out of everything. No one ever talks about that. I thought it was, I watched it. I was like, this is beautiful. And then you came up and I think Shane said a lot of your stuff was kind of like off the cuff the last minute, not even on the teleprompter. I was like, that really blew me away.

30:59Shane Gillis:because I was like how do you do that in that room I would be glued to the teleprompter sweating reading it and to be like all right I have my own notes I just formulated on a stage on live tv in front of an arena of people I really was I was like this is amazing faith in God yeah ask God send me the words feeling safe feeling like I'm not being attacked so I don't have to be defensive I don't have to be thin-skinned um and it culturally uh we crack jokes that when he died uh we did we we caught we cracked jokes i had to call my father and go can you come here and identify the body my father's like why i was like because you're my daddy go on and then look you know but but in stress sometimes humor equalizes stress so for me i when i first got to the talk on cbs one of the first jokes i told was this joke about my best friend peaches now i'm in chicago my husband dies jumps off a building my best friend peaches tries to outcry me at my husband's funeral and we're in a uh what is it funeral home uh 71st and halstead and i'm sitting up front and in my family we don't uh because we from down south and my father is conservative southern but we don't express emotion out out in public but so So I'm sitting up front and we're just wailing coming back from the back of the room.

32:30And it's my best friend Peaches. And she's wailing and coming up and she is showing out. Black people know she is showing out at my husband's funeral. Now her husband is sitting about four pews back. I'm just thinking about my family at a funeral. If one person showed out, they'd beat their ass. They'd be like, what are you doing? Now we all looking around like, who is that? And she's wailing. And so my father is nudging me and I'm nudging him. I'm like, I don't know what to do. She cried. So I walk up to her and I put my arms around her. And I go, bitch, what the fuck are you doing? And we laughing, but it looks like we're crying with each other.

33:11And I said, I'm going to let you go. Because your husband, Ivory Eugene Granberry, is four pews back. watching you cry over my dead husband i'm gonna let you go he gonna fuck you up when you get home and but i couldn't say those words and julie chen moon vass was the one who said let's make it tv friendly but let's put some words in it and get a little seasoning it's very funny but it's it's when you say culturally sometimes humor is the thing it's the most uncomfortable humor that really kind of it kind of lessens the tension and the stress when you say yeah absolutely do you feel you've ever gone too far in something yeah yeah for sure but then you're like you know as soon as you do it in a club as soon as you're wrong you go shit well well but i mean puns are supposed to get groans uh scatological humor is shit jokes you know they make you giggle like a kid you know the analysis of humor uh is what i love but if you dissect the joke so hard it's like a frog you you gotta kill it to dissect it but to me for the people who are upset and on social media i feel like you have a right to be that because now i get to talk about mental illness in men and specifically black men that men feel i don't need therapy i don't need this i don't need that right in this society but people say well how could you sit there or it was offensive well don't be offended for me if i'm not offended but be offended for your point of view and you can have your point of view yeah we're not saying you can't have it have it all on social media because most people trying to attempt to do stand-up will never understand how it feels it's it's like the greatest sex in the world with a bunch of people.

35:11He was just going to keep the high going. Milwaukee's going wild. $50. $50. Now, what did you want to ask me? I'm sure y 'all had some questions. What do you want to ask me?

35:24Shane Gillis:Yeah, well, really, my one question was like, and you kind of answered it, was like, how did you kind of put together that ad hoc response to everything that you said? You just kind of channeled God and just chilled out and relaxed. What do you I guess this is a question I had too when like because I've always wondered this before like you know you suffered this personal tragedy was there part of you that worried like I can't be funny again after this or was like I always wondered that if I befall some like or some like horrible tragedy happens to me will it just like destroy my sense of humor and I'll become like serious and sad all the time I felt like I had no choice yeah for me to survive that's why the book is I'm fat because of you because I had to survive I had to find a way to pay my bills I had to find a way to build a career.

36:08So I just looked at it as, and my father was like, don't worry me, why not you? Like tragedy can't come to your door like it comes to anybody else's door. So the first thing I thought, what is funny about this? What is funny? A lot of people say, well, why would you make a joke about being raped? And after I was raped, I went to the stage with it because that's the place where I'm most comfortable in talking to people about something. You feel? Could have used that one in the roast. Yeah. I thought you were. No. No, no, no. They told me. They told me that you guys might talk about me being raped.

36:45I didn't know. I would. First of all, I would definitely not do that. I would go, hey, this lady got raped. What a loser. Yeah, but I mean, come on. That's crazy. But would you say that is what roasting is now? It's no longer you a hockey puck. Roasting in y 'all generation in this time span of comedy, you hit really below the belt. And for me, I feel like the only thing you got to deal with, you ain't got to deal with me because I'm your colleague. You got to deal with the motherfuckers outside on behalf of what they mad about, right? But to me, if you worry about that, you restrict yourself to great comedy, right?

37:23So for me, every tragedy in my life, I bring it to the stage so that I can show the audience you can survive any tragedy. If God lets you open your eyes the next day, okay survive it because we're talking shit you know if if one of your relatives at the hospital that you hate and we all in the hospital room going if we could just pull the plug on this see how we all laugh yeah that's that's what humor does even though we know we not gonna do it or one of us might but the rest of us not that's what humor is for it's gallo humor it's irish wakes. It's black funerals. It's funny. Black funeral? Hey, dig that motherfucker up and check his pockets.

38:05Why? Because he owed me$50. That's humor that gets you over tragedy. I didn't know. I wasn't certain your late husband was black. The type of the way he died, I was like this sounds like a very white guy thing to do. Jump off a building? Yeah. How so? What do you mean? Because that takes courage? No. God, no. I mean, it does. I'm not disrespecting him. It does. You know, people argued me down when I talked about that. It certainly does. In mental illness, I felt it took him great courage to be in such despair that he would do something. There's no way I could have done that. Yeah. No way. But that type of despair and that type of stress.

38:53and people say well you know because i i had some therapy and um and dealing with some things but my thing is i i did not kill my husband but i may have exacerbated his stress and so now that comes through in my comedy and saying what type of companion i want to be to a man because i've watched the man i love you weren't talking during the game were you no all right not at all not at Now, that is one thing. Now, I might ask you a question in a movie theater, but I don't like to talk. No, that's great. Because I talk for a living. Don't you have moments where you don't want to talk at all? Yeah.

39:32The second I get off the road, I sit on that couch and don't talk for three days. And women don't understand it, do they? They get mad at you. That's where that joke comes from. You are out doing whatever you're doing. Your man is out doing whatever he's doing. and as soon as you come home, you want to talk to him. Give him a minute, let him shit, shower, and shave, and then let him get situated and give you a signal that conversation should come forth.

40:01Shane Gillis:That'd be really nice. That'd be so nice. That's why I tell that joke. That's why I tell that joke. It's literally just like you were talking to everybody else all weekend. I watched you. Right. It's like, yeah, that's my fucking job. That's right. But I don't want to talk now. They don't hear that. But then, is that why you're single? Kind of. Yeah. That's one of the reasons, yeah. Do you, when you finish the show, how do you feel about, because stand-up comedy is the most sexually attractive thing to do, aligned with singing. You got to see me do stand-up. No. It's a sexual, to make a woman laugh or to make a man laugh, it's a sexual thing.

40:45That's why it's so powerful. I'm making a lot of guys laugh. Making all these guys laugh. Fuck. Well, not that guy right there. Get all these guys bricked up. That guy. That's why he's happy. That's why he comes to work every day. I like that.

40:57Shane Gillis:I'll never stop thinking about that. Right. That's nice. But then when you stop doing it, when the show is over, what do you do with all that adrenaline? I drink. Okay. I used to. It's not like I will never drink again. Yeah. But I really want to see how I can reset my body for longevity. But I will tell you this. I drink because I like the taste of alcohol. And it's not that I like what it does to me. I like the taste of good whiskey or the taste of good gin or the taste of a great martini. And I used to smoke cigars, but I don't anymore. But I like that sort of thing. but are you drinking because your adrenaline is up and now you need to pump the brakes because alcohol is a depressant?

41:44Or do you drink because you like the taste of alcohol? I like drinking. Right. And you drink by yourself? No. You drink with bitches? I mean, sorry, women. No, it's almost entirely men. You should see my green room. It's literally... Why you don't slip the mickey and then get what you want? Because I see you looking at him. slip the mic in the drink and then you know finally I got Shane where I want him got your hat turned back got your socks on giddy he's a bad boy for life giddy usually just guys well see but that's the that's the wind down it's the wind down and remember we would go we used to have this thing and everybody goes to it.

42:36It's called the company field trip. And the company field trip is where I would take my entire team to the strip club. And I would bring in stacks of money. We should have a company field trip sometime. You'd love it. You'd love it. It's a lot of fun. A lot of great food. Where are we going? Magic City? Magic City in Atlanta. The wings are amazing. The wings are good. The broccoli. I fucking grub hub them. Yeah. I didn't even go to Magic City. I got fucking lemon pepper wings to my house. The wings and the broccoli. Wings and the broccoli. And the service is amazing. And we would go in there and people would say, well, Cheryl, why do you go in the strip clubs?

43:12One, to talk to the girls about, listen, I came last year. I like to talk to them too. That's right. Your ass still here. Yeah. You said you were doing this for beauty school. Why the fuck you still here? Or college or whatever. But then also, it's the only place where the guys aren't looking at me. they're talking to me about politics and sports and current events or street life. They're not looking at me, they're talking to me. They're looking at her. And then she primes them up and then I just lean over and go, so what you doing after this? It's kind of genius, honestly.

43:47Shane Gillis:It's funny, it takes like 12 naked tits to just focus on conversation.

43:56Sitting next to her just like, so how have you been? I never even asked. What's going on with you? How's little Tay-Tay doing? How do kids? What's happening? Yes.

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45:04Shane Gillis:Stinking Lincoln. I got, yeah, just the stinking Lincoln. July 17th, please come to Lincoln Financial Field in Philadelphia. It's the most important moment of my life. Yeah, that'll be fucking nasty. And if it doesn't go well, I'm going to leave this earth. I'm going to get pyro underneath the stage, and I'm going to tell them, go ahead. yeah just send it flame me i'm out

45:29Shane Gillis:guys i picked up some comedy club dates all summer long we're going to be having fun together i'll be six five uh june 5th and 6th i'll be at the summit city comedy club fort wayne indiana and that is that's in just a few weeks i ran into a buzzsaw over there did you really yeah what did you what happened this is just an absolute negative experience people were just hammered it's a fun club yeah that'll be i'll be there in the dog days of the summer Levity Live, Huntsville, Alabama The Stardom Comedy Club, Birmingham I'm excited for that, and Spokane Comedy Club Spokane, Washington Also, it's not up yet, but I have a bunch more dates, so check them out on metmcclusco.com Goodbye How do you wind down now after the show?

46:10Shane Gillis:That's something I always struggle with How do you like, because I feel crazy Yeah, how did you not drink after the roast? That was fun I kept telling myself you don't want to you I got a goal that I'm trying to get to sure I kept telling stuff stay focused it's like being an athlete most people don't look at us as athletes because it's such a sedentary life and you know it's uh excess right but being a stand-up comic you have to be able to remember what you're doing then remember what joke when it doesn't work to replace it with another joke you have to be ready to if I've been drinking all night now I'm puffy on camera right so it's a it's a lot of regimental type of training but for me after the roast I just felt relieved that's first thing I wanted to get out of my shoes but also I normally don't go to after parties I don't hang out and rarely do I go to what they call Hollywood parties because I'm kind of reclusive but then I thought come on Cheryl you need to engage people because you need you need work I need work especially There's no TV shows, no movies being done.

47:19I was on daytime TV for 14 years. So for me, I thought, okay, do this. And then I would never got representation and the things that happened so fast after that. But also I wanted to enjoy the height of working with my colleagues. That's what I want to experience it without alcohol in my system so I can remember it. Why are you smiling? I just, I had a great time. Yeah. I was fucked up. I love my colleagues. Made me love them even more. When you walked up to me with the Bud Lighting hand, I said, that's the guy. Yeah. That's the guy. And I thought that was the coolest thing. But the chance that we talked backstage.

48:06But then also to have a 45, 30-minute conversation with The Rock about life. Okay, how'd you feel? I've met him before and he's the nicest yes it's crazy how nice he is yes yes when he was making fun of me he was talking about me and him working out together and then sitting in a sauna and that's it was true we really did that yeah and me and him were in a sauna and he was just the coolest yes nicest it was weird yeah it was you know and having our body types sitting across from each other from each other and you look at very funny okay but would you work out with him and would I or did I yeah would you on a consistent basis no fuck no right Mark Wahlberg would you work out with him no he's a really he's up at 3 in the morning working out but he's a really great person I've never met him he seems like it there's a photograph the Pacquiao Mayweather fight there's a photograph of me and Mark Wahlberg on like this some kind of landing and we're just really ragging on Jake Gyllenhaal while he's being interviewed and he's a really good dude.

49:14Spiritually good. Good Catholic. Yeah, but he understands his humanness. Yeah. You know, that's one good thing about being in the entertainment business. You come across people you see in TV and movies and you get to talk to them and you'll find out the good or the bad and go, you a trip or I'm glad you are. I haven't met too many bad ones. Really? Not yet. Of those that are not you, you don't want to name them? No, I don't think I've really met any. rarely do I get my feelings hurt same way but that speaks more to who you guys are than who the person is you know cause you're not gonna track too much bullshit you got hands Shane you put your mirror down as soon as you put your mirror down miss a punch and fall down you're stupid that one I gotta step up and throw these little hands throw these little baby hands No, that's why I keep my squad of hitters.

50:14You keep Big Baby? That Big Baby over there, that Big Baby. Big Baby, LeBare. That's Cuddly Do-Right right there. That's Cuddly Do-Right.

50:22Shane Gillis:You just squeal, squeeze somebody. Just get in there and squeeze them. Our whole squad's drunk. We would lose to almost everybody. So you're lovers, not fighters. No, we try to fight. You're drinkers. We try to fight. We try to fight. It's a swing and a miss, ladies and gentlemen. But I would say I was I would go around, went to the after party. But I was like, come on, Kyle, let's get in the car. Why? Because it's time to go. Yeah. Yeah. Even doing Tony's podcast last night and people go. There's a party after. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And I was like, hey, let me let me do my thank yous. And thank you for having me.

51:02And, you know, you get to a stage in your career where you like, yeah, this is wonderful. You kids have fun. I'm going to go to bed. Turn the lights off. Make sure you put the humidifier on. I did leave that after party. Really? After the roast, I left, yeah. Really? Yeah. But then I was walking out and there was TMZ. Yes. They got me. What did they ask you about? I was trying to find Louis. Our one friend was, I don't think of mine. He was on Mali, I think. Oh, yeah, he doesn't care. And I walked out and TMZ was out there and they're like, what's up, man? How do you think that went? And I was like, I'm trying to find my Mexican friend.

51:35He's on drugs. And they followed me around the corner. And Lewis was sitting there like, and I was like, this is him. Found him. Because right when I walked out, the door guy was like, there's a guy named Lewis who says he's with you. And he keeps bothering us. You got to get him the fuck out of here. I was like, damn. And then TMZ was like, what's up?

51:55Shane Gillis:How did they not air that? That's a great interview. I don't know. I hope they have it. That's a great interview. How often do you come to LA? Never. Really? Yeah. Wow, you don't like it? I only really go places for shows. To do shows. So once a year, twice a year. Really? Yeah. See, I look at L.A. as a small country town with a lot of big inflated people. Yeah. It's really, everybody knows everybody. That's true. It's smaller than people think. It just appears big because it's Beverly Hills, Hollywood, Century City. But if you actually get in it, you're like, oh, you're just like regular people.

52:34You just have maybe a lot of money or a lot of power. Yeah, I'd never go to L.A.

52:39Shane Gillis:Yeah, I like L.A. started out as a puritanical religious community. Funny enough, the movie industry came in and they were like, eh, maybe not. Yep, yep. I like California in general. I just like the climate. It is awesome. Yeah, it's nice. You know what you would really love? What's that? San Joaquin Valley. It feels like the South. There's a lot of farmland. When I went to high school, I went to Atwater High, Castle Air Force Base. We had Aggies. And so the Aggies are kind of like the country and the cowboys and stuff like that. That's nice. Yeah. You would really like it. Yeah. You would like it a lot.

53:17A lot of drinking. I like drinking. A lot of... And farms. I like looking at farms. Yeah. Not working.

53:23Shane Gillis:There you go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to go to Napa. Napa's nice. I was supposed to go this weekend. You can get hammered on farms. I was supposed to go there this weekend. Why? What happened? I was... I'm tired. True. I didn't want to go. It was like a music festival. Yeah. Yeah. You wouldn't feel good afterwards. No. Yeah. Get hammered. So what's the plan then? So you said after the roast, things kind of connected and took off. What's the plan outside of the special? I would say continuing to work on the road because I love working on the road. Me and Kai on I Need a Job Tour. That's why we named it that.

53:55Because like most Americans, we need work. Yeah. I want to get deeper into podcasting.

54:02Shane Gillis:I was just about to say, do you have like an interview show you do or anything? Well, Kyle and I are working on politics and punchlines as the podcast because I want to be able to talk about the politics of all situations, including politics. And the punchline is the humorous thing that comes out of that discussion and move on to interview people. I want to start with just me and Kyle because you can't depend on the interview because the interview either might not show up or might not be good. If you guys aren't good together Your chemistry Then you don't have a show So I want to get into podcasting I want to go back to terrestrial radio I believe in radio Even if I'm just a contributor In all formats Sheryl Underwood's Great American Talent Search We're doing the first one in Lake Charles, Louisiana And I believe that What kind of talent?

54:55Everything Spoons Someone's going to play the spoons? Spoon, spoon, washboard. If you do hair and you can put in a quick weave in 60 seconds, that's your talent. If your dog jumped through a hoop or if it barked and sounded like it's singing, that's a talent. You can do a monologue. But if you are a singer or a singing group or a band, you must master the past. That's classic rock, classic country, classic R &B, classic soul, classic gospel, classic Latin, whatever you're doing. Not classic hip-hop. Yes, classic hip-hop. The guys up there are like, hey, everybody, my name is Jim. Yes, yes, yes.

55:35Because what it does, it brings in the demographic that remembered all that music, right? If somebody gets up and does Ronnie Millsat, wouldn't it be great if a white dude got up and was singing some type of country song, maybe even a George Jones song, but then said to the audience, let me show you what else I can do, and then started singing Keith Sweat. It'd be wonderful.

55:59Shane Gillis:Wouldn't it? And I come out and have my dog jump through a hoop. And I'm like, hey, everyone. Okay, so wait a minute. Some guy with a fucking pair of spoons is sitting backstage going, oh, fuck, I got to follow that. That's it. Wait a minute. I liked it. So would you guys help me pull it together? Matt would. We'll perform, yeah. Really? I like playing music. Yeah. But is anybody doing anything? He's got a blind dog. There you go. I'll have a blind dog playing the spoons. It's hilarious. you can't beat that kind of talent binging that does sound nice though I like the multi genre like let's see it all let's see what you can do but it crosses the reason I want to engage radio with it it crosses all formats and I want to do the preliminary rounds through comedy clubs so it's really an elevated version of the open mic hosted by local comedians and local radio jocks and then when you get to the final round then that's where you really have it's a bigger experience for the community it brings in small businesses it brings in corporations but it brings the community together if your fire department got up and did new addition it would it would really be a great experience for that but the one we're doing in lake charles is doing juneteenth and i asked them while we're tabulating the results, could we do a reenactment of Juneteenth?

57:27I'll be a part of that. Now, what would you be wearing, blue or gray? Blue. Come on, you see the house? I know. I just want you to say it for the people. Right? But don't you think, to me, that's what brings us together, right? And to do something fun like that after we do the I Need a Job tour, my next tour will be Sheryl Underwood's Great American Talent Search. Oh, man, I was going to make a terrible joke. Okay, Reggie. You know what the guys did after Juneteenth? What did they do? They went on the I Need a Job tour. That's shit.

58:02They said, oh, shit, I need to go on tour. Listen to me. Listen to me. For the brothers and sisters that's watching, he means the Fisk Jubilee Singers. That's right.

58:18Okay, so we got you on camera. You're going to help me pull this together? Yeah. Because I think it would be great for the country. And you can find talent. And if you want to put Afrobeat or EDM underneath some classics, you got to do something. I just think we can find the next Styx or Boston or even Leonard Skinner. Yeah. I think because all of that, these kids do not understand the fun we had in forming a group or making a band or, you know, trying to make this music and coming together, you know. as entertainers. How could Michael Jackson be vilified, die, and then become the best-selling movie but all his music is going back up the charts if there isn't something there?

59:06Right? Yeah. And so for me, I just want to bring the country together and I believe in this as something that would bring us together and could possibly turn into something really, really great. That's awesome. That'd be nice. Yep. What else you want to know? Is it time for me to go? Let me look. Oh, look at the time. Oh, okay. Yeah. That's another thing, too, that I have a tendency to do. I could be with a man, and I feel like I'm getting a little too relaxed, a little too talkative, and I go, you know, I think I need to go to the bathroom. And then I'll just sneak out of the building. That'd be so confusing.

59:40Why? I was like, things were going well, and she left. No, once these phones came out, I will text her from the car and go, hey, call me later, or I'm going to call you when I get home. That stops the, oh, she left? No. She really likes me. But I snuck out. I still would be like, I think I scared her. Scared of what? If a lady escaped. Yeah. Well, if I'm lingering, my dad had a saying, linger. Oh, that's nice. Linger long, but die you must. I don't want to linger. That's our country as hell done. We from Arkansas. Yeah. We from Arkansas. So to me, yeah, he said linger long, but die you must. That's right.

1:00:22Time will make a monkey eat red pepper. You know, he had these great southern things. Think about that. That's nice. That's right. It's tough for me to figure out, but I like it. Chicken ain't nothing but a bird and bush, it ain't nothing but chewed up grass. That was my dad, right? So to me, if I feel I'm lingering, I will make a getaway. You know? Yeah. lingering after you hook up? Because that's a great time. If a lady escaped after that, I'd be like, that's wonderful. Clinginess is a problem. Yeah. To me, I kind of resist. Maybe I'm, you think I'm a commitment foe. Wouldn't you say, fellas on my team, I'm a commitment foe?

1:01:05Possibly. Well, listen, I believe in love. I believe in monogamy. I'd like to get married another time, but I believe marriage is, till death do us part. I talk about it in my show, but I want to go through the courtship. Like, I believe you should not live with a man in the house. And I could be married to a guy and not live in the house until we're ready to live together. Because that's what fucks up the relationship, in my opinion, when you rush cohabitation and you're not ready. So for me, like if I'm back in my one and done days, sleep with a guy, I would like wait for him to go to sleep.

1:01:44And I would just borrow my clothes up and sneak out the hotel. It's wonderful. Nothing better than waking up and being like, oh, nice. And if I'm at his house, I would sneak out the house and put my car in reverse and let it coast out so the car wouldn't start. that's another one where I'm starting to get worried no no because hey Kyle do you remember that time that I pulled the young handsome man basketball dude yep from the front row and what did I do didn't I call you and I said and I was like why are you whispering I said shh I was like oh oh I said come get the luggage and he was like why are you whispering shh come get the luggage and don't let the elevator ding cause I'm right next to the elevator because I didn't want to see that pitiful look in y 'all face when the woman leaves.

1:02:37I was like, shh, come get the luggage. You know that pitiful face is fake, right? You know that's fake. Now, some men be looking sad. No, don't leave. Some men look sad. They look, why are you leaving? Where are you going? No, that's fake. I thought we were going to go get something to eat after. No, no, no. I like my alone time. That's good. No. We should do a dating show. I rarely talk about it, but yeah. But you know, because I think women need to hear what men really feel. Nothing. Nothing. See, I think y 'all do feel something. Y 'all just don't believe that women are going to listen. She's stupid.

1:03:22But yeah. Also, you can't be vulnerable to a lady. She'll hold it against you forever. That's not the right girl. I saw you cry, you bitch. Okay, okay. What sporting event did you cry at? So many. So many. Thank you. Yeah. That's right. Who gets the scholarship to walk on? Oh, that's every time. It's over. Down syndrome guys hitting threes. Yeah, it makes you cry. Putting a guy in, yeah, special needs guy on the bench, comes in, hits a couple threes. fuck that's beautiful yeah so why can't you cry in that I could even the one tear that's nice yeah I'm okay with that if she's smart she won't rag you for it she'll understand he does have humanity but shut the fuck up sometimes bitches you ain't gotta say everything to this dude just notice everything that'd be nice yeah

1:04:25Shane Gillis:I feel a lot of feedback myself. Yeah, you get some feedback. I get a lot of feedback. Really? Yeah. I get a lot of feedback. See, I just don't think we need to talk about everything. You know, sometimes when a man is ready to talk to you, be ready to listen. And sometimes don't answer back. Just listen to him and nod. Go, mm-hmm. Yeah. Wonderful. I got it. But sometimes I'll say, are you cool? Are we cool? Are we still together? Yeah. Are you cool? I feel like you need some time behind you before you can eat the proverbial pepper of just not bothering a guy that hard. Time plus distance equals clarity.

1:05:01I'm going to leave you alone so that I don't shoot you. I'm going to let you have your space because you're talking to me crazy. You're kind of flagrant right now. I know you mad about some bullshit. I didn't know that was your father. Motherfucker, why is you in my face?

1:05:19Just listening. You listen to a guy, also figure out what he eats, figure out what his comfort zone is. Make that great, because then he's going to make everything great for you. 100%. Happy home, peace of mind. Makes a man come back. You hear this, LaMare? It's true. That's right. Me and LaMare live together. So will you find the man of your dreams? That's me. He doesn't make me anything. LaMare hasn't cooked once. Actually, he made chicken Alfredo. That was nice.

1:05:54Shane Gillis:there's chicken curry in there from a week ago that's in that fucking jug in there throw that out that's been fucking disgusting he's got a jug of fucking chicken curry in there it's fucking gross i didn't know where to put it throw it out throw it out but how are we doing that's that's good yeah all right thank you very much, Cheryl. Thank you for having me. Thank you. I was stoked when I heard you were coming on. I was like, this is awesome. Look forward to working with you guys. Let's work together and truly bring the country together. I would love that. Do it. I would too. Good stuff. Watch new episodes of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Spotify.

1:06:38Do it.