10-Man Manchester City Prevail in Derby, Arsenal Remain Perfect, and Liverpool Stall Again: Men in Blazers 09/13/26

28:16So it's probably more than the raw numbers would suggest. Yeah, God, that's not as many as Jordan Pickford then, because I'm pretty sure the data says that he's worth 39, and Everton's entire season is about the other boys trying to find that one point on their own that they need. But the conversation crackled as to whether the ball does or doesn't lie. Arsenal just steamed up the other end, a mere 121 seconds. As you say, just an incredible turning point in the game. and who was it? God bless. The Premier League football script writers, Bruno Gimoresh. Of course it was. He went Jordy earmuffs on the Sunderland abuse.

28:53And pretty much like a bazillion Thor pulling out a hammer. Almost no back lift on the shot. He just lashed one. 30 yards out past Robin Roos. Off the bar with a delicious third. Just an incredible way to score his first goal for the club. Raw. I thought they were getting a fighter but it turned out they were also getting a lover. and what a way to give it back to a hostile crowd. His celebration, holding his fingers, nay a part, which has been interpreted, I think quite generously to mean you were a small club Sunderland. It must have felt ecstatic, Roel. I'm not sure that's what I think he was getting at.

29:29I think it was a more personal insult, wasn't it? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Every single broadcast, I was like, he's saying they're a small club. I was like, really? I'm not sure he is, no. I also enjoyed the cupping of the ears I liked the fact that two of his teammates joined him in the ear cupping, the kind of come on, let your abuse wash over me type thing, they had greeted him at the Stadium of Light by chanting fat rat at him, which I think is an odd logic, and I say this as someone with a great deal of respect for Sunderland, so much respect Roger that I think it's not fair to describe them as being north of the wall, the wall is further north, but surely they should like Brendan de Maras, he left Newcastle is that not good should he not be popular on we're he's back with us he's back in human turn I don't think football really works like that I'm glad I'm glad he's weakened our chief our chief rivals but it was the thing about Bruno is that as much as he is a strapper and a kind of leader and that kind of combative presence he's also a brilliant footballer and the the goal was it was a perfect shot it really was and it was the sort of game that needed that I think to break it effectively it was it was a game for a moment of magic a set piece something along those lines and Bruno has it in his locker to provide that you've got tiny Ben Shelton's um this was such a powerful moment and it only just elevated a game which was already robust into just ecstatic levels Jenny C an Arsenal fan in the MIB discord said I need a cigarette and I don't even smoke Sunderland again world like that old-timey boxer who just licks the blood off their own lips and smiles.

31:05It was like watching Raging Balls some of it. They keep throwing those haymakers and in the 84th minute, Granit Xhaka drove one of those irritatingly chafing balls into the box. Goalmouth scramble. Raya forced to claw it brilliantly over the bar. Then there was Concer during with the aforementioned Xhaka. A scene which I think filled every single Arsenal fan's hearts with joy as much as the win. And then that late, the late backbreaker, Sunderland stretched and opened. I think it was Dyslexic R9, Ray Nildo who tickled Saka and King Kai just about beat Robin Reeves 2-0 on the penalty 2-0 to the Arsenal six wins in six games all comps not going to be the first person to make this point but it does have to be made it wasn't the win itself that was impressive here or is the manner of it this Sunderland time were good they were very good they should actually draw strength from the performance despite the loss but this Arsenal team are great they're great to watch there's so much I admire about almost every dimension of play, the solubilist clean sheet, the truly attritional test passed, not with ease, but with an unwavering confidence.

32:10Let me ask you this, Ro, who'll be the first team to take points off Arsenal this season? That is a good question, because it's not immediately apparent that anyone can at the current rate of progress. It always feels like that when a team's on a good run, and we should kind of look back over 150 years of football history and point out that no one's ever won all of their games. So somebody will make Arsenal drop points. I don't think it'll be for a while. I think the most obvious, most immediate one is maybe Forest away, which is October the 18th. I think that's possible. After that, I'd say Newcastle, November the 21st, which is a game that Newcastle will be up for.

32:46I'm not even sure they've assigned it at a time slot yet, but if that's a kind of 4.30 Sunday afternoon kickoff, St. James' Park will be really up for it and it will be a challenge. They will drop points eventually, Rog. But what I will predict is we will still be talking about can they go invincible by January. Oh, God, that Newcastle game. Get ready for a lot of this. That's why we watch Fagima Resh Mimes. Arsenal fans, we've got a magical documentary. Arsenal did us deluding? Question mark. Debuting next Saturday on Network NBC. It's 3.30pm Eastern on the big channel. Be available on Peacock the following day.

33:25And it is a thing of beauty. But back in London, Chelsea 2, Hull 2. Yes, in this fascinating clash. Two teams neither had shown any interest in possession so far this season. One had become the league's best attack in doing so. The other, the league's best defence. We didn't have to wait long to find out who'd saw first. To their credit, Hull kept Chelsea out for a full six minutes, 16 seconds, which I think is longer than any Premier League team has stifled them this season. That's late for a Chelsea opening goal. They netted in the first minute, the fourth and the second. So those who tuned in early probably were disappointed that it had to wait an eternity.

34:07Seven whole minutes. This time, Morgan Rodgers catching goalkeeper Konstantinos sleeping, stomped it in via the near post for his third goal of the season. Four assists also all comps. A goal involvement in each of Chelsea's first games. I don't want to say Xabi Alonso is a tactical genius, Ro. but as Not Goldfinch said in the MI Discord is it that simple that all you need for effective attack is friendship It's a lovely message isn't it? It's beautiful It is And something that's occurred to me over the course of the last couple of weeks actually Rog that at a club where everything is in so much churn as Chelsea like permanently where everything's in flux all of the time where you're as a manager you're constantly having to build those bonds between players to get those connections those relationships working it must be a massive advantage to have two players who've played with each other since they were kids it must just really help that you don't have to teach Palmer and Rodgers how to read each other's movements how to get on the same wavelength as each other they will know instinctively I would think Chelsea are a smart enough club they certainly employ enough people Rodgers to think that in a season where there would be a load of new players in the team because there's always a load of new players in the team it's worth maybe paying that little bit extra for Morgan Rodgers just because he understands Cole Palmer Yeah, I mean, it reminds me of their friendship, just their love, their connection.

35:29When my kids were little, they used to read a book, George and Martha, about two hippopotamuses who just love each other, just live together, just tight. I like to think of them like Morgan Rodgers and Copom, like a Bert and Ernie situ, just like single beds, little night table in between. They're like that tight, and it's showing on the field. It is magnificent. I expected Chelsea to press on, though. I've got to be candid. This was the first time they've dominated possession in a league game this season. And it was honestly just like United, it was as if the expectation of initiative made them synapse.

36:02Because Hull in response dug as deep as their aquarium. See what I did there. Just before the half hour, goalkeeper started the move, fed it through Ryan Giles in the corner. Deep cross caused utter chaos in the Chelsea backline. Is the chaos in the Chelsea backline or is the Chelsea backline just made of chaos? Every defender blew a chance to deal with it. Hato, Gusto, all the O's. And they're quite mischievous. Mohamed Baloumi met the moment. Slapped home. Raw, Chelsea and clean sheets are like some kind of peanut allergy. None in their last 20 Premier League games. It's a 65-year record. This was my favourite goal of the weekend, Rog, because it was the most comic.

36:40You could see from the moment the ball bounced that Jorl Hato had misjudged his jump. And it's not something you see very often in elite football. Normally they figure out how to kind of get their feet in a position where they can do something about it, even if the clearance doesn't quite go where they want it to go. They kind of get rid of it. But I think we've all been in that situation. Anyone who's ever kicked a ball at some pathetic, like, pick-up, scratch game level has had a ball bounce over their heads because they've misread the flight of it. I think it's important that the game remains connected to its roots, and I think we should all thank Jor-El Hato for that.

37:16Five minutes later, blew me again! Man sounds like the Premier League player most likely to sound great on a salad. Corner came out to him. Blashed off not one, but two deflections. Cue the delirious Hull City fans chanting, we're going to win the league. Chelsea fan at R2D2 in our Discord moaned, I hate getting mauled by the Tigers. Boo's at the break from the Chelsea fans at Stamford Bridge. Now, this Chelsea comeback from 2-0 down midweek against Leeds and the Carabao. Started to charge at the Hull back line. who started to live out their manager's prediction for how they would actually live with Chelsea pre-game when asked.

37:51He said, kick them, which I loved, the honesty. And they kind of did down that stretch. Rhys James had a free kick whip, hit the post. Emi Martinez, Synapse spilled the ball in front of McBurney. Chance he didn't take, and that would prove to be a road not taken by Hull. Cole Palmer and Joe Pedro have no time for your Hull City fairytale. Ice salesman ran down the flank, took out, was it, three Hull defenders with quite stunning caress of across straight to Joe Pedro's left foot smashing home and raw the relief across Stamford Bridge in that moment it felt like a blast wave I think and it's testament to Hull I think that they made Chelsea feel that way that they took a game that I think a lot of people assumed would be the point at which Hull's bubble burst and and really had Chelsea sweating yeah three goals three assists four Premier League games for Pedro who I spoke to for an episode we're going to release on Tuesday I asked shall Pedro roar?

38:45What he thinks when he takes possession, he's got Morgan Rodgers and Cole Palmer ahead of him. He just laughed. He said, my job is just to pass it and then run fast. That's all I do, he said. I'm the fast runner. And there were chances for him and his fast running for Chelsea to run it down the stretch. Truth was, it's very odd watching all the attackers, including Danny Welbeck. It kind of over-elaborated, a lot of deference, a lot of over-passing, over-flicking in some cases, trying to score the artful goal rather than just slapping that ball in the back of the net. Hull actually did have the best chance at the death.

39:19I think it was Cho far post. Martinez smothered. Let's talk about Hull City in one second, because they do deserve all the respect after this, as you say. Chelsea, do we file them under remaining work in progress? This unbalanced squad, almost like one of those mythological animals. They attack like a proud bull. Bottom half is made out of pure blobfish. The back line doesn't smell danger, doesn't have to deal with it. Emi Martinez, I've got to say, he looks erratic at times. It is incredible. And this stat, and you might be able to explain it because I couldn't. Chelsea are without a win against promoted sides in five home games.

39:57Why is that? Yeah, it's a weird one, isn't it? And I think it must be a combination of Stamford Bridge being one of those places where teams go and want to make a statement in a way that probably isn't true of let's choose a fan base that won't get offended. Craven Cottage. You know, it's a big place to go and play. If you've come up from the Championship, you want to be at Old Trafford and the Etihad and the Emirates and Sanford Bridge and Anfield. Those are your big fixtures. So you lift yourself and Chelsea fundamentally haven't been good enough for a little while to take advantage of that.

40:27That, I think, makes sense. That there are other teams closer to my heart than Chelsea, Rog, who have been in that position before, where you find that the opponents are really, really up for it. and because of a lack of quality, you can't overcome that greater resistance. I think that's probably what's going on. But also, and we saw this especially on Saturday in the Premier League, everyone's really good. The games are balanced. Hull City have spent more money than Barcelona, I think, in the transfer window, strengthening that squad. They're not turning up as a championship team. They're turning up as a team that is good enough to be in the Premier League.

41:01That makes every game almost a flip of the coin. This was a weekend, I think, in which there were no home wins whatsoever. which is there'll be many, many editors in many, many newspapers commissioning long think pieces into this. For Hull, huge respect. This was a really, really well-coached performance by Jekirovic. Outshot Chelsea, out-XG'd them, made sure his team found moments to break beyond that Chelsea backline without being stretched. Hull efficiently have the same record as title-winning Leicester at this stage in the season. What is really possible for them? Molly McBurney was asked post-game in the interview whether he thinks they can rush for Europe now.

41:43And he just laughed and kind of said, essentially, I bite your arm off for 17th place, which was our goal when we began the season. Should they be thinking about getting their European passports ready and preparing to Duolingo? You'd be mauled by the Tigers into multiple languages. I mean, they should have their passports ready. It's nice to go and sample other cultures, Rog. But I don't think they'll need them professionally. It's been an amazing start. they've done far better than anyone gave them any credit for. Jekirovic, the coach, is a real star. He's a really good character to have in the Premier League.

42:12He's got that very kind of deep, growling, I want to say Balkan voice, I don't know if I'm allowed to, but he's got a really kind of wicked sense of humour. He's got a really wicked sense of humour as well. He's a genuinely funny man. And I've been to two whole games this season and I've really warmed to him. Europe's probably a push, to be perfectly honest, because the lead table, I think, will even itself out. and the old hierarchies will establish themselves eventually. But Hull should not be limiting their thoughts to 17th. They should be thinking, hang on, we can get into the mix for that big kind of mid-table melee.

42:45Because the start they've made gives them free hits for the rest of the season. They've done far better in these first four games than anyone thought. They don't need to be thinking, can we straight by by the skin of our teeth? They can start thinking about asserting themselves in the division. from joy to deeper funk. Liverpool nil, Fulham nil. We told ourselves Liverpool's midweek Champions League performance against Atletico Madrid made them look a little like Liverpool again if you kind of squinted. Enter Fulham, pointless Fulham before this game. But really the protagonist in the early exchanges really tactically were set up to expose Liverpool's vulnerability in front of their back four.

43:26Is it the centripetal force where the defensive midfielders should be kind of sucking that ball backwards. Alisson, one of the team's leaders, played the ball straight into the teeth at the Fulham press early doors. Picked off immediately between Santa Bersh and the heart of the Liverpool area. It's kind of like watching the Liverpool backline pull a pin out of a grenade in their own bedroom. Sheer panic everywhere. Jacquet clearing off the line brilliantly. And we talked about this a little bit in Big Weekend Preview. Watching red fans just eulogise Jacquet as the greatest French import since the Bayer tapestry.

44:02That I'm used to, how quickly they warm to the new characters. But it is a sign of, I think, vulnerability more than confidence. Well, Liverpool fans, not just quick to embrace the new faces, which they love to do and have every right to do, just this new strain of revelling and knocking those who've departed, Canate in this case, or Curtis Jones and his Inter Milan performance midweek. It's just not like them. It's like a tree that smacks a vulnerability. Yeah, do you know what? I think ultimately, Rog, Liverpool fans have spent an awfully long time telling themselves that they are different to other fan bases, that they behave differently.

44:37There's always that thing about Anfield being a knowledgeable crowd. There's this belief that Liverpool is in some way kind of more loyal, more faithful, more communal experience than a lot of other clubs. Last five years really disproved that, I would say. They are, the Liverpool fans are just like every other set of fans. And I think the speed with which the glee with which they've kind of turned on players who won championships and who delivered incredible moments in Jones's case were homegrown were scouse kids in the team I think is I personally and I say this not so much as like a a professional observer of football but as a Liverpool fan I find it really upsetting I don't like it at all I said as we said on big weekend preview I think like I watched the Real Madrid inter game last week wanting Curtis Jones to play really well I want Canate to play well I want Trent to play well because I have bonded to them and I desperately want to bond to the players who've replaced them and they're making it very hard Rog not not admittedly Jacquet who has been outstanding since he came in but most of the others are making themselves quite difficult to love at the moment I would say let's talk about that I mean in that first half Liverpool to me looked like some kind of on a slot tribute band midfield disjointed Fulham played through easily at will.

45:53Forwards felt isolated. Alexander Izak had four touches more than you did in that first half. Bradley Barcola, God bless. Looks like he's in his bedding into English football phase. Got bodied early and often needs time, deserves time. But Roar, the discordance in attack, sourced by many back to Florian Wurtz. I've always felt like he's a little bit of a scapegoat for this kind of Liverpool transition way. But in this game, again, hearing many Liverpool fans trying to lord the distance he runs more than any other player. He kind of looks to me like that one guy at the office who looks busy but doesn't actually produce anything.

46:31There's an internet nickname for him, which I love. Cardio King, which is the door. This is a guy who undeniably has all the skills, the passing ability, the vision, the tactical read. But watching him mess chance after chance in the transition, I find it humanly hard to watch, especially when you've got a kid like Josh King on the opponent, just driving that transition with ease. What is it? Because he can do it. Is it just mental as to why he's not enforcing his will in games like this? So I actually went to Anfield on Saturday to watch Virts, Rog. I'd set myself that brief of, I'm going to try and figure out what I think of Florian Virts.

47:12I'm going to fix him. I'm going to write a briefing to Andoni Arayola and tell him what to do. No, I think he's a fascinating case study. He's become a talking point player. He's the player who was the subject of the analysis. He's not the first. Same thing happened to Paul Pogba. The same thing happened to Trent Alexander-Arnold at Liverpool. Same thing happened to Mesut Ozil at Arsenal, where they were always the player that everyone looked at. And watching versus, it struck me that there's two things. One is structural. And yeah, there is an element of scapegoat about him. but Liverpool have changed their entire structure to accommodate him and that means you have to deliver, ultimately.

47:46This is a team that's based all of its recent success on playing with a midfield three. They have three central midfielders who were bought to play in a three together. They are now playing in a two. None of them are good at it. None of them look like it suits them in the slightest. They're doing it so that Wurz can play as a ten. When the team has been structured around you, you have to make that worthwhile and Wurz doesn't. As you say, he has this habit of underhitting passes, which is a really strange thing for a player to do. Overhitting, I can kind of deal with. Underhitting seems like it lacks self-confidence.

48:18That's a problem. And the other thing is, I do wonder to what extent he's now in his own head. Because he does have talent. It's not a physical problem. The reigning footballer of the year in England is Bruno Fernandes. Bruno Fernandes does not look like Arnold Schwarzenegger. He's not a particularly remarkable physical specimen, Bruno Fernandes. King is very slight but is a wonderful footballer. Cole Palmer is not massive. Again, these players are all tens and they are all thriving. Virts isn't and I wonder to what extent it's because he is on some psychological level aware of the pressure that he's under.

48:52The fact that he is the person who has to make it work. They've signed Bradley Barcola because he needs pace around him. But Bradley Barcola never gets to show his pace because Liverpool take so long to get the ball up the field that by the time Barcola gets involved everyone's standing still effectively watching Liverpool on Saturday and maybe at the end of a long week Champions League game difficult Champions League game against Atletico Madrid maybe there was a little bit of fatigue there but it's a real grind watching them Fulham didn't create a huge amount if I'm completely honest they played through Liverpool a lot but didn't really go anywhere Liverpool had two or three chances but they make everything look very, very difficult and Verts is central to that Yeah, I mean, first, if only the Germans do have a word for it.

49:37We learned it during the World Cup. Kof Kino. Kof Kino. The cinema in your own head that you're just constantly replaying the spool of over and over. I've got to say, it wasn't just him that had Kof Kino. It felt like the entire stadium of Anfield was nervy, was quiet. I've been to Murakami book readings where the crowds are noisier. At T-Cup wrote in our Discord, Fulham will feel like they're playing a home match. It's that quiet. This was Irola's first experience with Liverpool fans leaving the game early, which has become a recurrent under-honour slot, symbol of real malaise, fourth straight draw at home for the first time since 2011.

50:14Irola talked about the fatigue you just hinted at for midweek, the learning curve his team are under. But this is a team with$300 million players in the lineup and somehow still not creative, still no ability to control, still seeming to contain a not insignificant number of players, Kerkes, Simakas and more, who just do not seem good enough for Liverpool football club. The bitter issue to me, Roger, I've got to admit, is how little any of them seem to add up together. I'm not quite sure what the plan is. I don't see why they've decided that a midfield of, in this case, Gravenbertsch and Soberslay will work.

50:56I don't see what the idea of putting Barcola in the same team as Wurtz is meant to do. The big one is I don't really get why they've got Andoni Araiola in, a manager who needs a press, and are making him play with Alexander Izak, a striker who does not press, up front. So much of it doesn't make sense. And to bring it back to Jacquet, I actually think that part of the reason Liverpool fans have bonded to him so quickly is because that's the one bit that looks functional. Him and Van Dijk is a central defensive partnership. It works really well. Van Dijk's not what he was, but he's still a top-class footballer.

51:31That bit makes sense. The rest of it, if I'm completely honest, kind of looks like a mess. One thing Andoni Arola can change at Liverpool, an immediate dividends of result. He can play Dominic Sabaslai, not in central midfield. I'd like to see Sabaslai play on the right. I know he doesn't want to do that. He gave an interview to Steven Gerrard last week in which he said he does not like playing as a right winner. But I did see someone, I can't remember who, online, say that he has two futures. One is as a right back, which I think is probably a bit of a waste. But the other is as Liverpool's version of Rodrigo de Paul.

52:05not in the sense of fighting Robert Lewandowski but in the sense of playing that right wing role an inside right role where he does a lot of the running a lot of the dirty work and I think that would suit Sobber's lie and it might well be that Iriola needs to have a difficult conversation with a player who would like to be Liverpool captain to ask him to kind of sacrifice himself for the team By the way, quick button on Fulham I was quite impressed with them relegated early and often by many including this guy rumoured to be a squad a riff for their manager already. I was surprised by the level of organisation in this performance.

52:38Could have been three points with more composure in front of goal and a first point for Arbelauer back at the stadium. Must have felt magnificent where he played for Liverpool for three seasons. Yeah, he was a good servant to Liverpool, was Arbelauer. And I don't think he really got a round of applause on his return, but he deserved one. And it was a really good performance. It was an encouraging performance. Garcia works really hard as a striker. Josh King's a lovely footballer to watch. He's really promising. and he will play for a Champions League team at some point. Sander Berger is enormous.

53:06I think that can't be understated. They looked organised, determined. They played some really nice stuff. There's no real cutting edge there is what I would say. They looked a little bit blunt, but they made me worry that I shouldn't have predicted them to get relegated. I still believe that hiring Obalo as your manager is a little bit like going to see Milli Vanilli in concert after you find out they're lip-syncing, but we will see. Football always makes a fool out of all of us. Aston Villa 1 what? Nottingham Forest 2 Forest opened the scoring 45 seconds into the second half by the most unexpected of sources Liam De Lapp first for Forest a fine strike first goal in 29 long agonising games Villa equalised ending their own personal torment 372 Premier League minutes without a goal as a team but then an 88th minute Igor Jesu strike after a quite stunning Morgan Gibbs-White back flick in the area.

54:00If you've not seen this goal, find it. It was delicious, man. Forrest won at Villa for the first time since 1994. First win in his new role for Oliver Glasner. Now I'm beaten in his last eight games against Emery and Agony for Unai Roar. That man visits Tottenham next weekend. I don't know if I can watch that game honestly. I just feel sad than the Green Mile. I know Aston Villa didn't win their first five games last season and it all came out great. I know they've got injuries. I know they've got real hope for good reason in Johan Manzambi just beginning to sub in alongside Ibrahim Mbaye. But when you replace Rohr, Morgan Rodgers with Gonaccio and Nico Jackson, you kind of do get one draw and three defeats at home.

54:46That's the new normal to me that you should expect. Yeah, you're asking a lot of Unai Emery's coaching ability as well. What he's achieved at Villa has been remarkable ever since he arrived. but to give him kind of such a short turnaround time to replace half the team that won the Europa League got into the Champions League last season with this kind of mishmash of new players they have signed some really good footballers but it takes time and the Premier League doesn't really allow you time so it all once again kind of comes down to Emery in a way that it probably shouldn't Villa have been established enough at the top end of the Premier League now that they could have been better organised about it I think When should they be worrying Villa fans?

55:23It depends, I suppose, what you mean by worrying, Rog, because I don't think they need to worry about getting relegated. That's not going to happen. They'll be fine. If you mean when should they worry about maybe not qualifying for the Champions League, a lot sooner than that. But then they may well find that the rest of the league waits for them. It doesn't look like a campaign where four or five teams are going to go clear, where anyone's going to start putting huge runs of points together. It's so finely balanced. I think that even if they're 12th or 13th by December, they will still be within touching distance of fourth for quite a long time.

55:58Read the hare and the tortoise. Villa fans, it's all going to be OK. In other games, Bournemouth 2, Brentford, of course, 2. Kevin Shaw, the double, man lives to score on the fruit. Second tied the game and poor new Cherry's manager, Marco Rosa. he saw Ben Gannon take a wondrous blast in stoppage time which looped off a deflection and then pinged off the post so his Bournemouth set a Premier League record of leading in their first four games to open the season and failing to win any of them at least their consistent rule yeah and we talked about this as well haven't we Rog that it does become a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy a little bit conceding late goals not being able to see out games because your opponents know that it's a problem for you and you know that they know that and they know that you know that they know that and all that.

56:49And the more it happens with Bournemouth, the harder it's going to be for them to break that cycle. Fortunately for them, Rog, they play Liverpool next week, so they'll be fine. God, we've got to get, you know, we've got a Wormburner sting, we've got to get a Kopfkino sting because it sounds like a whole squad of Double K. This was, I need to know, a clash of two sickeningly well-run football clubs. There was an amazing article, if you didn't see it in the Times, about how deep Brentford go in their scouting background checks. I think it was Janel, Vitaly Janel, was shown the dossier they prepared on him before he agreed to sign.

57:19And it included an interview, Raw. Did you see this? Would the owner, wait for it, of his favourite restaurant to find out how he treats the waiters? Because he believed that that can reveal the truth to someone's character and they only want the good guys in that locker room. It boggled my mind when I read that, Raw. Because whom amongst us doesn't have, you know, little traits that are a bit dark if you plumb? what's the worst thing about you, Roar, that would kind of scupper your move to Brentford? We all have bad traits. I think it's probably the number of scouting reports I commission on people, Rog, and just how nosy I am.

57:53No, what's my worst trait? That's a very deep question. I don't know if I necessarily want to. What would scupper my move? Yeah. What one thing would you now, you've now revealed that what you're going to say is not the real one, which I love. I was trying to think, what would, what would. Little habit. Do I have a, a trait that's toxic enough to make somebody... I do. I definitely do. I think mine would be my rampant narcissism. No, mine. You're out of control. I was going to talk to you about that after the show. Out of control narcissism. No, I'm very... I have a lot of top key now going on, to be perfectly honest.

58:31I feel like I've got a lot of top key now, yeah. You do. A lot of... You play for Liverpool as a number 10 there. I've got one that I feel like Brentford... I am genuinely embarrassed but can do nothing about how disgustingly perpetually dirty my computer keyboard is because i work like i have my breakfast over i eat my lunch over i'm constantly typing away keyboard is like just i'll be honest i'll look at it sometimes i'll ask my am i an animal am i what separates me from the animals that's what i look at the fact you own a computer well no i'm sure there's that cat meme where the cat's typing away no one shows you what the keyboard looks like when i open it on the phone all over the shop when i open my keyboard on the plane i am just like so self-disgusted if that's a german word um by the way my mum told me i was home in liverpool she looked at my keyboard she goes that looks like you could become pregnant just by touching it i have seen i've sat next to you on a plane rog with you with you having your um your keyboard out and it is it feels inherently toxic and like it's bad for all of us maybe that would qualify you in an administrative role as A lot of clubs will do background checks on players to try and establish their personalities, and most clubs will then sign them, even if their personalities are terrible, as long as they're good enough, because most clubs don't actually care about it.

59:47But interviewing the manager of his favourite restaurant feels not just excessive, but kind of intrusive, to be perfectly honest. It's a bit creepy. Didn't moopy. We've got these photos of you. Vitaly, here in the dossier, we've got these photos of you asleep. They're taken from inside your bedroom. This is, look how much we're interested in you. That's not what you need to know. Northgate season three storylines. Coventry nil. Brighton five. The other team not called Tottenham yet to score a top flight goal or campaign. Coventry had all the first half chances, but Verbruggen's strong Dutch wrists of a young owner in this.

1:00:26Kept them at bay. And then Castales, the young striker, won the score since January. Incredible goal. Pounced on the clearance, nodded it into space, screamed, I'm pretty sure smelly elater in Greek before bounce shooting the ball home brilliantly. Really smart finish you maybe didn't see that you should. Google it. Yeah, it was just Coventry, but God, how they wilted, especially after a 1U was sent off for an elbow to the head. Really an elbow of frustration. Seagulls, God bless. Now in fourth place, rolling at ease in this one, as if to a play in a JV back line. Lewis Dunk's incredible foot shape.

1:01:02You can find that on this shot from way downtown. Q, you're going down with the Palace chance, which I just loved. Four losses for Coventry's start the season for the first time since 107 years. Their first year of founding. Raw, a.k.a. Big Frank in big trouble. Yeah, it feels very much like they are listing fairly badly already, Rog, to be perfectly honest, which I wasn't expecting from Coventry. I thought Ipswich would come up and be pretty competitive. but Coventry I expect to deliver much more than this. They just seem to be unnerved by the chasm between the Championship and the Premier League.

1:01:39I think they'll stick with Lampard. I think that they will find a little bit of rhythm at some point but it's been a really rough start for them. Talking about down there, near the upside down, Crystal Palace 2. What? Ipswich Town 3? The Premier League's two leakiest defences clashed and they always bet the over derby and it lived up to its billing from the off. Palace took the lead 14th minute, held out for all the nine minutes for Ipswich level via record signing. Emerson two ends in a chasm of space. Second goal of the season, I think, for him. Then 34th minute, plot twist. Palace's Axel de Sassi sent off for a high tackle on Ipswich.

1:02:20Jack Clark at Dean Adder's in MIP Discord. You can take the man out of Chelsea, but you can't take the Chelsea out of the guy. Everswich took the lead, but then seemed overruled by the knowledge he had something precious to lose, allowed 10 men Palace to equalise. Jürgen Strand-Larsen spun, fired past. I think he's Jonathan Swift's favourite Premier League player. 6 '9", of goalkeeper Kiel Sheerpen. But this was all prelude for wonder. 90th minute, Everswich's deadline day signing from Burnley. Zian Fleming subbed in, latched onto a rebound to steer home the winner. first top flight win at Crystal Palace for the Tractor Boys since 1980.

1:03:00They've already got half the number of wins too that they had their entire last Premier League campaign. Raw, this is the season of the newly promoted teams. If you spend money semi-wisely, you can almost try and life-fest yourself to safety. I've been calling him Zion Fleming, but I prefer calling him Zion Fleming because it makes him sound like an off-brand Bond author. I'm pretty sure it is Zion. I would never quibble with you, Rog. On pronunciation, are you joking? I have a... My pronunciation, I make up about 97 % of them. But I do have a daughter called Zion. So I'm pretty sure he's a Zian.

1:03:35But Zian Fleming sounds like the guy who... Like the alternative, the sci-fi name of the Bond author. Off-brand Bond inventor. Yeah. Zian Fleming's James Bond. Yeah, it's his alter ego. It's his nom de plume. When he wants to write the books, he calls himself Ian Fleming. When he wants to score the goals. no I and Zian Fleming is kind of it's James Bond in space that's what it is isn't it James Bond for the kids yeah no it's an amazing game it's brilliant for Ipswich they and Hull to an extent have followed the Sunderland model effectively which is you come up throw a load of money at a load of players and that will deliver and Ipswich I think it's been part of the plan they came up last time two years ago and were a little bit more circumspect about their spending I think they were thinking, right, this time we take the money, we go back down, we come straight back up.

1:04:27A lot of their signings were made, I think, with the aim of being able to get straight back out of the championship. They did that, and this time they really went for it, and it seems to be paying off. We'll see. Do you know who Zion Fleming's brother is, what his name is? Go on. It's John Le Carre. That's the worst. Every time I've done the worst piece of podcasting in human history, You plumbed the depth there. This is a John. Yeah, Monday night, Leeds. Welcome, Newcastle, to their nighttime Ellen Road Bear Pit. Two German managers collide with their teams unbeaten. Tough night to be a bear in that part of England.

1:05:04I think a game that will be definitive for both teams' level of aspiration. But it's time for us to delve the depths of Tottenham 0, Everton 0, El Sadico. I just want to say, I was so sure we were going to lose this game. Raw Everton are, yes, we know their make-a-wish in corner. We lost our last five at Spurs by a combined 15 goals to one. David Moyes, one win in 15 there. Spurs, remember, had won, yes, just one game at home in the calendar year 2026. We learned on Thursday, we reminded ourselves, of course, it was against Everton. In fact, Spurs did the double against Everton last season. Everton essentially kept you up.

1:05:45You're welcome, Tottenham. We gave you life. Look, this was a game so bad, it could barely have even been an email. Player of the game, Peter Drury, who just dropped bar after bar. There was a barrage in the first 10 minutes from Spurs, and he said, Spurs look like they mean the beers. And they just said the beers sound so good out of the Drury lips. Everton overwhelmed. Just the excellent Gerard Brantway and his defending masterclass keeping us afloat. But David Moyes, his team are nothing if not resilient. First half ended goal. Everton actually had the chances in the second half. Juice B Hall miss when sent in.

1:06:23There was a poor Brennan Johnson whiff. God bless Brennan. To better days, man. The entire experience was honestly watching two NFL teams try and win a game while turning the ball over six times each. Spurs look so nervy, so psychologically fraught. By the end, Drew was eulogising that search for potency. He said the crowd are arms up in supplication, begging for a Tottenham goal. Again, it sounds better from Drury. He uses the word supplication, not enough in everyday combo. They wouldn't get a goal. Despite a woman, and it was a grown woman in the crowd, grown adult, quite beautifully handcrafted sign she took to the game in oddly cheery script.

1:07:03Please score a goal. Not today, Roar. Very nil-nil, said Drury at the end of the game. First time in history Spurs start a season without a goal in their first four games. Remember, this is a team that they fancy being nothing if not pure entertainers. So this is dirge-like, a reality which is the opposite of their DNA. Spurs are 17th, warmly familiar. We've kept saying, Roar, Spurs should not panic about the$405 million of new transfers not clicking yet. But Roar, when exactly should they be worried? They should probably be starting to get worried, I think. Again, I don't think Spurs are in any danger of relegation, same as Villa, but the fact that it's been so slow, the fact that all of this change has brought about absolutely no improvement, and the fact that an attacking coach with an attacking team can't find a way to break teams down is a genuinely worrying sign, particularly when that attacking coach is so combustible as Roberto De Zerbe, because it does sort of suggest that things could go south pretty quickly.

1:08:07The bright side, I'd say to Spurs fans, you're not in the relegation zone. Your team haven't scored a single goal all season, but you're not in the relegation zone. But you've nailed what worries me the most as someone that does care about Tottenham Hotspur. Here's Roberto De Zerbe. He is cutting a very odd figure post-game. He did this weird rant. In Italy, I'd be the best coach, two clean sheets. He tried to get the Italian journalist from Gazeta della Sport to agree with him, which was, which he said, that's what you'd be writing about. Yeah, it was just an odd bit that fell totally flat. And then he just went all out on Spurs.

1:08:42That came last season when the SHIT was up to here. Hand gesture really high. Started working with this group two Thursdays ago. News to all of us. We have not the physical condition yet. And then he capped it with a, he said there's a word in Italian, I sound like James Horncastle when I do this, slobacassi, I don't know how you say it, SPLA. Splacarsi. Splacarsi. It sounds like an incredible pizza with some really hot meat on it. It sounds like an incontinence cream, but go on. By the way, I love that. I love incontinence cream on my pizza. He said it literally translates as if we unblock ourselves.

1:09:18It's a mental block because four games, no wins, no goals scored. Mental block. Roar, I'm starting to wonder, did we overhype? Did we overexpect Art Easy as like a brilliant transformationalist? his pass is nine jobs 12 years quite combustible spark plug he doesn't stay anywhere for long are we just like projecting glory as a definite? Yeah and in those 12 years he's won two trophies one of which was Seri Chi the Italian third division and the other of which was the Ukrainian super lead with Shakhtar Donetsk which is impressive but Shakhtar are the team that always wins or were at that stage the team that always wins the Ukrainian top flight I think a lot of it depends on context doesn't it?

1:09:59De Zerbe is a good coach in the right context. He's shown that at Brighton. He showed it in patches at Marseille. The question is whether Spurs is the right context for him. But the big worry, as you kind of alluded to, Rog, if he senses the ship is going down, he is as likely to point at somebody else and say it's their fault as he is to try and save it. And I think that's... He saw a hole in the deck, right? I think that's what Spurs have to try and avert. And the problem is they've got, you know, next weekend with Villa, you're getting a team that is in a similar position, has a similar level of concern mounting over it, but is maybe in a much more positive frame of mind because they really trust their manager.

1:10:38Spurs and De Zerbe don't have that. He hasn't done enough to warrant that yet. So it does feel like a very delicate situation at Tottenham, I think. They could really do with a goal and they could really do with a win. God, Spurs just have that awful bruise, that essential angst of managers who crap on the team on the way out of the door, just adding another layer to their Kopfkino. Big point, got to say, in context for Everton, Jordan Pickford's 100th club clean sheet, which is an insane feat when you remember that Michael Keane was in front of him for 45 of those games. By the way, on Peacock Now, a really beautiful version of our first-ever British live show taped at the Hill Dickinson with Everton Football Club starring beautiful, beautiful Kenan Dewsbury Hall and my mother.

1:11:23She's in it too. Everton have not lost. Since we taped that, it's a reverse curse of Rog. Let's end with a whip around the sentiment table. Roar, who have you got as your top three? Not on points, but just on feeling Aura vibes wonder as we finish week four. Well, I think Hull City have to be top, Rog. There's no question about that. And I'm going to go for Ipswich second, because they will also be feeling cock of the walk at the moment to get that away win at Palace. And I think third for the Manchester Derby win, Manchester City. Yeah, I had exactly the same. Hull first, mulling their way to glory.

1:11:57Ipswich Town, we shall not be moved, is just the greatest vibe. I've actually got City and Arsenal tied, both feeling utterly perfect and invincible. Who's your bottom? Just to be clear, Rog, that's cheating. You can't say top three and then be like, well, I've actually, I've got two of them. Again, I'll ask, what Geiger counter are you using to make these rules at Roar? That is a simple code of ethics, Roger. My bottom's right, I'm not being funny. but it has to be Spurs bottom. They haven't scored a goal yet. It would be ridiculous if they weren't bottom. I'm going to have Villa second bottom because they are also feeling deflated.

1:12:34And I think as much as I'm sort of tempted to put Liverpool in there, I think Coventry losing 5-0 at home to Brighton is a worrying sign. I've got 18th place Spurs, but they're 17th, man. They're feeling yefted. League ended today. We're just in the place. So you need to be 19th place Villa. I think it's a bit hard to fathom right now. And 20th, I got Manchester United rule after that loss to 10 men. Manchester City following the Ainsley maintenance and just the whole ticket nightmare. With long-term season ticket holders having their tickets taken away from them and really realising who hates United even more than City fans, they feel like United owners do in this moment.

1:13:20That is dark. To the letter of the week, keep sending yours to meninblazers at gmail.com. We've got a beautiful letter from Suzanne Rose of Portland, Oregon. Roar, do the honors. And Suzanne writes, The race for Europe feels so intriguing this season. Everyone can make it, but even tighter, and no one is talking about it. Handsome manager table, some serious competition this year. Who are your boys' top three and why? Thanks for all your joy, Suzanne. I think the why will be relatively obvious, Rog. I think the why will be because they're handsome. I think that's what qualifies you in the handsome table.

1:13:54No, I mean, we've talked about this. This is amazing days where the dinosaur legendary manager, you know, your Ancelotti, your Mario, those are over. To become a Premier League manager has never been more of a meritocracy. You just seem, as you said, to have to have a giant tactical brain and to be able to simmer with intensity in sparkling white trainers and look great in what you said last week, a really tight T-shirt. And it's like everywhere right now. So it's very hard to unpick. Who's your top three? First is difficult for me. Third, I think, might be Keith Andrews, the Brentford manager.

1:14:24Who is the man? Is it Cillian Murphy who's in Peaky Blinders? Yeah. There's a little bit of Cillian Murphy about Keith Andrews. He's got a lovely, lovely accent. He's got amazing hair. I don't know how he crimps it, but I'd like to know his product. And then in a nod to your kind of ethical chicanery, Rog, I'm going to go for a joint top one. That's nonsense. And they are. Call in the police. So technically, the most handsome Premier League manager, I think, is Marco Rosa. Marco Rosa is a very good-looking man. Classically handsome. But I think if you were to go for kind of handsomeness combined with like a raw sex appeal, it's Xabi Alonso.

1:15:04Finish that sentence because... Well, Xabi just has a... I mean, there's an aura to Xabi, I think, that makes him impossibly attractive. I think it's maybe looks and charisma. Xabi maybe steals it. But Marco Rosa is, I think, probably the most classically handsome person. It's so funny. I wonder if Shabby didn't cross my mind. We didn't talk about this or compare notes beforehand. I think because that back line makes him inherently less sexy. But I've got to say... So it makes him sexier. I think this is the one area in which Pep Guardiola, I think, has possibly left the biggest void, man. I've got to say, that man was so singularly very, very, very cool.

1:15:44He was it for me. I remember doing the handshake, you know, the football people do, that weird popping handshake when we last interviewed him in Manchester. And we looked each other in the eye for a second. And I just, in my head, just flashed. I thought, two bald men, similar height. We could not be more different. Not even human beings, animals almost. One man was like a Mapogo lion and the other was just like total wildebeest in comparison. One man was a Mopodo line and the other man had an awful lot of food in his keyboard. Yeah. By the way, the keyboard and food was the best thing it had going for me in that moment.

1:16:21Look, for me, winning is sexy. I do think Mikel Arteta is an unfathomably good-looking human being in the flesh when you hang out with him in real life. When you interview him and his eyes sparkle and he's just sitting there so poisoned in control, I think he's just an incredible human being inside and out. Of the newcomers, I agree with you. Marco Rosa. I think the technical term is a nice bit of scruff, right? And the way he gifts points made me think he'd be a very generous lover. My top number one with a bullet. We've talked about this before. I love beauty on the inside and out. So I was really torn here.

1:16:56I think Oliver Glassner is fascinatingly complex as a human being, and I adore him. And Donnie Irola with his gorgeous little tummy and his tracksuit. I think Man is a Murakami fan. I think his brain is, he's literature deep, I really love him. But we've got to go. Daniel Farker. Man is just an all-round great human being. He's football-obsessed, yeah, which is good for me in a relationship. He loves his books, loves his music, loves his DJing. I love that. I think it's a long-term relationship as opposed to just a one-night stand, which is what I'm looking for in my Premier League manager relationships.

1:17:32I think Daniel Farker is my Premier League Mr. Darcy. To be fair, if you're thinking about long-term relationships, it couldn't be Arteta just imagine the psychological warfare that he would put you through it would be like 50 Shades of Grey level stuff that's what Mikel Arteta is getting into you can't be having that in a relationship you'd have to have a safe word you'd need a safe word GFMPs be in touch with Gabrielle is the safe word the email oh my god but what do you remember as always meninplaces at gmail.com that is it I'm drawing a line there that's it for today where are you off to this week I am taking I'm a neutral journalist Raj I am taking my son, who is nearly nine, to his second ever night game at Anfield on Tuesday night.

1:18:15We're going to watch Liverpool's reserves lose to Tottenham's reserves. You're a great father. I'm off to Chicago tomorrow, my spiritual home. We're actually filming with Myles Lewis Skelly this week. Send us your questions for that magnificent young human being. We'll be back Thursday for a very special version of Big Weekend Preview with Humphrey Carr. But this is Rog saying let's not take a second and watching football together for granted. And courage.