Liverpool's Dysfunction, Chelsea's Firepower, and Rayan Cherki Magic: Men In Blazers 08/31/26

22:57Roger Bennett:It's like, you know what I mean? Maybe people should be forced to celebrate them. Yes, another constitutional amendment. Make it happen. Put the clause in. Credit Brighton, though. I mean, amazing. perseverance and belief. Other teams would have been out for the count. It became stressful. It became a little trembly. And in those moments, it takes a special man to take control of the game, a.k.a. my mate, Cole Palmer. You know him. It's just the world's greatest ice salesman. Swooped in upon that ball in the gut. He's had a quiet game by his standards in this new Cole Palmer 2.0, but he came alive.

23:40And he always does in those places. One of those footballers, not like Cherky, who seem to thrive where the bullets fly, charge around four Brighton defenders. You can always feel him feeding off their fear. And then he just arced home with a lethal precision. He came on our show last week. It was a really singular conversation. I think he gets a kick out of coming on. I love how he thinks. I love what he says. He is very, very different. Never changed, Cole Palmer. He just said, and the interview's linked below in the show notes, the world's not ready for me. Shabby Alonso, you saw the relief, charged down the sideline, jumped into the air.

24:17Brighton scored late, just to underline how vulnerable Chelsea are. Against Brighton, who, remember, did the double against them last season. Second time led to Liam Resignia's firing. They win, they prevail, but the stats were remarkable. Just 26 % possession, and I know this is the season of not wanting the ball, But that little roar also means Chelsea can't control games at all. So yes, relief for Alonso, a joy, first home game, first home game win, signed to the entertaining football that Chelsea fans believe should be theirs by right. But with a game at Arsenal now looming next Sunday, I can't wait for that one.

24:56Where are you in this process? There's potency, there's vulnerability. Chelsea seem both perfect and deeply imperfect. effect 12 goals flying in at both ends in those first two games I think you have to kind of look

25:08Roger Bennett:at the green shoots of progress to be honest that Xabi's come in and he's very clearly imprinted a style of play on a on a squad that until very recently and possibly still now is a is kind of a mess they've still got kind of 40 senior players on their books they've got so many players Rog that several of them are having to train like next to the main first team group so you've got Alonso with the first team players, but because Chelsea don't want to have what we call a bomb squad, you know, a group of players who are allowed to leave. You're not allowed one of those anymore. They've got the other group of players who are allowed to leave.

25:40Roger Bennett:Who are now called not a bomb squad. Who are called not the bomb squad. It might look like a bomb squad, Rog. It might feel like a bomb squad, but it's not a bomb squad. We have to stress that. Yeah, they're not slow horses. No, come on. Be serious. You think that's a bomb squad? They're just training next door, but they are kind of adjacently training to the first team. In that circumstance, Alonso's taken a few weeks and he's kind of built a team that has an identity and that's a really impressive feat of coaching, I think. There are still obvious vulnerabilities at the back. They are still getting used to the system.

26:11Roger Bennett:But given what Chelsea have been through in the last five years, four years, with pretty much every coach, given how low the lows have been for a club of that ambition and a club that has spent that amount of money, I think you really have to look at the positives and say he has got a front three that is the envy of the rest of the league. He's got a midfield that's starting to tick over and he's got a system that's creating chances. That's not bad going in the circumstances in which he's working. Bring on Sunday at the Emirates. From fun, fun, fun to alchemic sorcery. I crap you not. Crystal Palace 1, Manchester City 4, Friday Night Lights in South London, a raucous bear pit.

26:51Palace repeated for the second week on the run. They're quite sick trick of opening with menace and intent and then conceding. Shauna Sarr, Shauna Mateta, both want away. Both were conveniently injured. Let me just say, deadline day. It's a time of terrible, terrible illness, isn't it? It's a borderline epidemic.

27:10Roger Bennett:Yeah, there's a lot of diarrhoea in Britain at the moment, Rog. A lot of diarrhoea. There's nothing much we can do about it. It's ripping through the nation, particularly quite a lot of its footballers. Yeah, I'm not a doctor, but I wish you better, lads. I don't know how to diagnose what can cure what ails you. But I do feel for Palace's new manager, Pierre Sarge, a real thin line between transition and turmoil. News this morning, Munoz off to Forest. As you say, transfer deadline day, going to be pretty definitive, I believe, for his fortunes. The visitors arrived with a new manager of their very own.

27:44Yes, Enzo Maresca, a.k.a. Tesco Pep. And he gave the people what they want, starting that Dude Perfect video in football boots, Ryan Cherky, the man who changed the game late against Bournemouth coming off the bench living two assists. He started alongside former Palace man Mark Gahey, trying to fill that Rodri-sized hole here. A bit like a dragon, launched against his own people. And for all the talk of that midfield, who opened the scoring? 17th minute, it was freshly shorn early in Arlen. A Semenyo-Hart ball to the centre of the box. and Earl, he just rose like a stuffed raccoon off the shelf at Wild Bill's Western Store in Dallas, Texas, dunked on poor Chris Richards in the process.

28:28Why do you have to hurt a man like that? In the moment, Roar, it looked almost undefendable. And I was just saying, watching him score with that new buzz cut, old Earl used to look like you'd just been scored on by a Viking berserker. New Earl, it's honestly even more insulting. It's like you've just been scored on by a giant baby.

28:48Roger Bennett:Yeah, I'm not sold on the haircut, Rog. I'm really not sold on the haircut. I think it does, very clearly, as he proved amply at Selhurst Park, it does not affect his performance, not having the hair. But it's definitely undercut his aura. I don't know how to explain it beyond that, and I'm sure people will disagree. But there is something less intimidating about Harland now that he's cut all of his hair off. Yeah, he wants you to underestimate him. It is. It is like genuinely if he ran around the field with a diaper on, he couldn't look cuter. It's like it's the baby destroyer. I honestly think there's brilliance to it.

29:22It's almost like a pep tribute. I am your heir. Do not be afraid. What was the thing that men fear the most in life? It's not death. It's baldness.

29:32Roger Bennett:You say I don't even fear baldness. Bring it on. I do wonder, to make a semi-serious, semi-ridiculous point. Are you just saying I've just done a... Which one did I just have? I'm being serious here. I think we're in a post-possession world in football, we're in a post-hair world, but go on. No comment. I do wonder to what extent Harlan's haircut is timed deliberately to kind of signal the start of a new phase. Whether it's sort of, OK, like I've done the Viking berserker thing, and now I need to be like a leader, and so I will have a new haircut to signal that rebirth. I do wonder, knowing Harland a little bit, I do wonder whether there's something like that going on, that he's done this on purpose at a specific time to kind of signify that he is now a different person, that he's ready for a new part of his career.

30:17It's funny, you mean like the Joker just suddenly discovering makeup? It's like this is the new me, a whole new era. It's like Tessa the D 'Urbervilles in that beautiful book when she's just finding her whole life brought down by men. she just shaves off her eyebrows to make herself utterly unattractive a whole new a whole new

30:35Roger Bennett:present well look some people would be very attracted to no eyebrows some people don't like it when you can express surprise i honestly with all the botox i've had um i'm amongst them but i do want to say there is something for me it's like everyone else is flying off to turkey and he's just been like you can have your fake hair transplants i'm voluntarily going bald what could be more potent than making that statement in the same way as i read the other day roger and obviously i'm i'm not i'm not a cool person so i have to read this kind of vicariously but apparently people aren't getting tattoos anymore because kind of that's a little bit passe and now the the greatest tapestry of your skin is the is the skin itself are you saying that harland has gone like well like fabian herzler is having what appears to be the most unnecessary hair transplant in human history yep and he's saying well i've got so much hair it's actually a problem for me i'm so virile and so vibrant and so alive that I just can't stop growing hair.

31:32Yeah, the only step he can take more than this is just to get into a post-close reality, wander around Manchester in a loincloth just foraging for Sultanas in the field.

31:41Roger Bennett:That sounds less like a show of strength and more like a breakdown, but let's roll with it and see what happens. It's a thin line, and I'll tell you, it sounds like a 40-goal season loading. Incredible stat, Erling's 24th goal in London. He is the ninth best goal scorer in London since 2022 and who plays his football, in case you know, in bloody Manchester. Second half, all about the Cherkin Essence. French King of Wizard, Phil, said post-game, I played like murd in the first half. I was about to be substituted. He said that he told his manager, give me five minutes. You do not need to make any changes.

32:17That's a terrible accent. It's really bad. It is crazy, though, Roor. and we'll get to what happened next in a moment but it is a reminder, football's such a mental game and the Premier League's greatest entertainer like the man has a residency in Vegas entertaining he was ready to put on a show but he almost had to flick his own internal switch to make it to him.

32:38Roger Bennett:Yeah, I think to an extent that's good management though to see a player who's clearly kind of aware that he's not met his own standards. Strictly speaking, I should be substituting you but you seem to be determined to prove yourself to me So I'll give you a chance and let's see what you've got. And Cherky, he's the sort of player who maybe needs that extra little bit of fire in him to really get the best out of him. Because when he decided to shine, he really shone, Rog. 54th minute, Foden exploded up the gap, fed Cherky on the edge of the area. I think four defenders, five maybe in front of him.

33:11Whatever it was, it was not enough. Changed the game last week, trotted on, created two goals. Just cloaked of invisibility past three defenders. He took the ball outside with one delicious touch. And then Chris Richards tried to body him. But Chris Richards became the bodied, if that's a thing. He went across his direction of travel as he lost his balance. One of the most tender kill shots you'll ever see. It was a deliciously mischievous topo. Raw. I think it's technically called a toe poke of wicked diabolic ability.

33:43Roger Bennett:And it's inventive. And that's the main thing with Churty, isn't it? that he can be quiet in games, but when he does come to life, he does things that nobody else in the league really does, and that's a really precious thing to have, that degree of magic. Without Guardiola there, without that overarching visionary who sees what's going to happen, who seems to be in control of events, you maybe need a little bit of ingenuity, and Cherky has that more than anyone else. He's one of those players who lives to piss off his opponents, thrives off it. I once chatted to him and he talked about how sometimes in a game, a defender will look him in the eyes wrong and he'll just want to destroy them suddenly.

34:22Look at that first goal and you will see, just look at the reaction of the Palace defenders to it. They were seething with just, I think, how slow, how lethal, how impotent they've been rendered in that moment. Cherki lives for that feeling almost as much as scoring. And Palace was suddenly in Hello Darkness, my old friend, my new manager Pierre Sarge. They barely worked the keeper all night until they did. Pino, World Cup winning Pino, stepped up. I think the free kick had Tieno, Barry levels and Whip and Nene. Went in, off Donnarumma. Could have embarrassed him, I think, more if he whipped off his undies with the world watching.

35:00Game on, or so it felt. But the way Turkey's feeling, there's no game. Just transcendence. Took control of the ball immediately on the edge of the area. Palace backed off. Really a deadly decision. Cherky just lashed away, slight deflection, lifted it over Henderson. That first goal, he ran off as if it was no big deal. Second time, ran off roaring, almost calling game, and Palace never had the punch to lay on City again.

35:27Roger Bennett:That felt like it was it. It was a little bit of a flex. It was saying, we have a player here who can settle this, regardless of what you do. That's what the very best players do. They take games by the scruff of the neck. They decide to bend them to their own will. And Cherky did that in that kind of spell after half-time. He basically said, I am going to win this football match. There's nothing any of you can do to stop it because I'm good enough to kind of make the world look like I would like it to look. And if he can do that more, he did it a lot last season, if he can do it more, then I think it served as a bit of a reminder that we've been thinking of this as like Haaland's city, but it could very easily be Haaland and Cherky's city.

36:05Roger Bennett:And that is a different order of threat. Yeah, I mean, not just those two. City brought on their new$115 million cultured Moroccan prodigy Ayubouadi. Got him a couple of minutes. Fascinating human being. Great profile. I think it was in The Guardian. The only boy of four siblings. Studies, did his exams a year early, mathematics degree in his future. Plays a lot of chess when everybody else is on the bus playing cards or just on their headphones. He's like studying away with his maths book. He's a really fascinating kid, and I can't wait to see him eased in. You've got Haaland screwing a second late.

36:43Just 20 touches all game, but bloody hell did he make them count. For Palace, back-to-back losses. Really a lack of depth right now, a lack of cutting edge, which would be, I think, the biggest worry for the fans. But for City, Raw, ends in where Esca starts with back-to-back wins. A crackling surge of optimism building after this one. Feeling a squad is transforming. with the likes of the artists formerly known as Savino and Rinders gone. Gahey looking resplendent, Cherky and Haaland. You know, Foden raising his game, possibly if he can keep them at Cole Palmer style, a kind of rebirth. The possibility of true City menace rule.

37:23Roger Bennett:How would you handicap it? The problem is, Rog, the big question still remains, which is they beat Bournemouth slightly fortuitously, I think. Bournemouth played pretty well. They came within six minutes of taking a point from the Etihad. they beat Palace very easily but I'm not sure Palace are in a great state as you say so it still seems very early to kind of start making bold predictions but I guess what we did see on Friday night was the level of individual quality that City have regardless of who the manager is even if there is the shadow of Guardiola and Moresca can't quite live up to it they still have extraordinarily good footballers and they're adding more and more so it's a real privileged you know to be able to respond to the loss of a generational manager by spending 400 million dollars on midfielders and that's just midfielders you know they're about to sign we think Cody Gakpo from Liverpool for more than 100 million dollars he's a substitute for Manchester City they are spending you know the amount of money that does kind of offset the losses they have suffered in terms of players but also in terms of Guardiola that there is a point where if you just have lots of good footballers on the pitch, you'll be fine.

38:26Roger Bennett:So I think we maybe have been a bit too quick to kind of rule City out based on these first two games. But I'd also say that they haven't necessarily been the toughest challenges they will face this season. Yeah, we're all on Enzo Fernandes' watch also. I will say, over£100 million spent on Cody Gakbo, almost their scouts saying, let's get our transfer bust in. Let's get him in quickly for that. That's a good value for that position. is just one of the greatest madnesses of this transfer window. Also, I mean, we'll talk about it on Big Weekend Preview. After the transfer window, the number of players moving from big teams to another big team, it's as if there's no scouting department looking for value talent anymore.

39:11It is a remarkable world of football we are living in right now. So much of it happening, it's almost become normalised. It is not normal. across Manchester. Manchester United 5, Ipswich. Oh, two. First home game of the season at Old Trafford. And Old Trafford, I have to say, searching before the game with just almost like a willed optimism from the fans repressing recent dark memories, e.g. last week's shocking self-soiling at Hull. Enter another newly promoted friend, Ipswich Town, fresh off shocking, Sunderland themselves. You have Michael Carrick. I love the way he bristles in these press conferences, so eager to dampen that narrative that he's about to enter that same follow-up cycle.

39:56Offered by past iconic player, turned interim manager, turned permanent managers. But I've got to say, Raw, the beginning, not great, Bob. Ipswich, credit them, not over-awed at all. And CISO driving them forward. They won the wings, manifested just before half hour. Fatah Wu, nutmegged Luke Shaw. I think he screamed, rewound it a couple of times. My lip reading, not really at John Boy levels. Pretty sure he shouted, see you later, sad grandpa, as he blazed down the flank into the box, lashed a pullback, which is opposite fullback. I love a fullback to fullback goal. Leif Davis met perfectly on the half folly.

40:34A really well-taking goal that John Woo speeds. A goal of swagger, shocking confidence, and Old Trafford in that moment, Roar,

40:45Roger Bennett:gobsmacked stadium just staring into the abyss we talked about it with liverpool that there is that sense of here we go again basically and that that's what happens at that at that moment at old trafford was that hull was as much as michael character i thought was very impressive in trying to downplay the existential crisis of losing your opening game of the season to hull city there will have been a real deflating of united's hope around that game they went into the season for the first time in a few years, thinking, OK, this could be quite good fun. You then lose at Hull and you feel, all right, maybe this was all an illusion.

41:18Roger Bennett:Maybe we're not kind of where we thought we were. For that to then be compounded by conceding at home to another newly promoted team in what, on paper, looked like a very kind start to the season for United. That's not a great feeling, that you're kind of blowing it in real time. Yeah, let history remember. Davis could have had a second within two minutes. Ipswich were feeling it. They tried to hem in United, but as they did so, this was an agony. Nunes slipped in possession on that freshly laid Old Trafford turf. And the entire up switch-half was open for Cunha to rumble into. I love the ball that he just unleashed deliciously to a speed in Bruno.

41:56Took one touch. The slap shot was honestly, I don't like to be hyperbolic, but it was Ovechkin-esque. Huge relief. Second half, United ratcheted up the pressure. Kobi Mainu seemed to be everywhere, driving his team forward. Marcus Rashford, the prodigal son in his first start since December 2024. He flickered positively. And within a minute and a half, Harry Maguire, Premier League buster Keaton, burst through on the edge of the box, handled the ball to get control, quote, accidentally, and then lashed a shot, Maguire style, off target. It hit grief. Stay with me here, listeners. And went in as an own goal.

42:40If it had gone in via Maguire directly, this would have been ruled off because the score of a goal cannot accidentally handball. That's the letter of the law. But because the ball actually went in off the defender rule, it counted. We've talked about this so many times. Letter of the law, correct. But the feeling, the equity of the law, God, it felt like Ipswich got screwed here.

43:03Roger Bennett:Yeah, it's actually a really good example of the difference between those two things. The decision was the correct one the way the laws are written, but when you read the laws, it's so obviously stupid to anyone who has ever watched a football match or understands football or likes football that you find it really hard to believe they've managed to concoct a version. yeah like it it's not even that if maguire had scored directly it would have been ruled out if maguire's shot had been on target and deflected it would have been ruled out the fact that you need so many like fine gradations to make a decision is totally kind of it's totally unnecessary to be honest i i actually think in this case the more confusing element is all of that stuff only applies if it's an accidental handball i think that one was just a handball he lifts his arms up They are in front of his body, but he very clearly lifts his arms up.

43:53Roger Bennett:You can tell from the reaction of the Ipswich players, immediately they see that is a handball. The fact that the goal stood and that it stood on a technicality, I think to most fans, regardless of how they feel about Manchester United, would feel like it's not really how it's meant to be. But this is what IFAB, the body that decided the laws of the game, and then the various refereeing bodies in each country, they have this tendency to get themselves in these positions where things that should probably just be quite simple are made inordinately complicated. Yeah, I mean, it's one of those, if you've ever played football rules, you kind of know.

44:28And in that case, it just feels like they didn't. I actually thought, you know, when you're diagnosing intent or not intent, I actually think it was, I don't need to be hyperbolic, I think it was manslaughter. Also, you can imagine Mikel Arteta this morning just seeing that loophole and just training his boys on complete handball and then just like lashing the shot just off target off the defender. It's going to be like the new. That's how we get the corners. Yeah, if you've handballed it, shoot wide. Yeah, that's it, lads. One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three. And while Greaves was still, I guess, grieving, he brought down Cunha for a penalty, which Bruno Dispatch passed a quite massive 6 '9".

45:09Sherpen, who is the Nick Voltamade of Yao Ming's. I don't even know what that means, but the goal, the handsiness of it all, so harsh on Ipswich. But that mood changed completely beyond belief. Bruno took over. I do think United without him, even though he's in between generations now in the rebuild. They're like Wrexham without Rob and Ryan. They ended up with 33 shots, most since 2016. And their player of the year completed his hat-trick and ended the route with a quite delicious assist to set up. Oh, a tender and boom-o-lob. We spoke to Bruno pre-season. It's linked below. And he told me I love this, that he wants to get better at every part of his game.

45:51He told me he should have 21 assists every season. He kind of hinted if the players finished off the chances I create, which I also loved. But with that one result, we're all United. They flip, completely mood-changing, the narrative. And Michael Carrick, plain talking, direct. He talked about his team's grit. You look at this squad. You look at the incredible array of talent up front. I really love it. I admire and I fear those forward options. You have the midfield, they've got Belieber, newly arrived who can bed in and give them options there. The back line, man. Maguire, Luke Shaw, does seem unwieldy, does seem cumbersome.

46:33But Roar, I think the football will write United off

46:36Roger Bennett:too prematurely at our peril. Yeah, there's definitely enough there in what looks like a fairly volatile Premier League season. There is enough there to believe that they can be a threat because they don't need to be perfect. They're not like a Guardiola-era City team. They're not a flawless unit who are going to trample all before them. But they can hurt teams, as you quite rightly say, with Bruno in that sort of form and Buemo, Szczesko still to come in. Rashford being reintroduced into the team, which I'm not sure anyone really foresaw. They do carry a threat. Ahmad is still not there because of injury.

47:08Roger Bennett:And then in midfield, I think Beléber's, his energy will be really important for United. He's basically sacrificed a year of his career. He seemed to not be able to get over the fact last season that he was denied a move. So he's got time to make up for. And he gives them that real kind of impulse, that drive in midfield that they've been missing. They had a good summer, United. They looked well set. You're completely right that we write them off at our peril. I think the issue they have is that excitement at Manchester United tends to spiral out of control pretty quickly. As soon as you see a green shoot, you think you see a tree.

47:43Roger Bennett:and they need to keep a lid on that because it may well be that next season when the defence has been reinforced, that's the time that they can start to really challenge Arsenal, maybe City, maybe Chelsea for the title. Break your arm off for a green shoot. Next up for United, Everton. Chuckles. I'm in danger. Ipswich welcome Liverpool, which is going to be genuinely fascinating. To our weekly segment, Tottenham fans, I feel for you. Like Chuka Khan. Spurs nil, Newcastle 2. You know, with modern football, we obsess about the transfer market. You wrote about it in the correspondent newsletter this week.

48:21We talk about which teams have won the transfer window. Spurs have spent, I think, is it$540 million so far and eight players. Omar Mamoosh latest to be conscripted to the brave new Spurs. Before kickoff, there was a ceremony to welcome all the new boys to the club. Spurs have got this PA announcer. He's got, let's just say, a reputation for saying unfortunate things before terrible events. And he chose before kickoff to bellow these words into a microphone. This is a real quote from a grown man. We spent and we spent and we've got lots of top players. I mean, Roar, wax wings and the sun.

49:08Roger Bennett:Yeah, but it's kind of hard to argue with his logic. they have spent and spent and got lots of top players what's weird is that football is quite superstitious and you're not meant to say that bit out loud until you've won some games he obviously didn't get the memo but I admire that Rog I admire that willingness to embrace to embrace danger I'm a coward I have all sorts of superstitions that I like to maintain I like it when someone says do you know what I don't care I'm going to take the risk I'm going to do this anyway I think he said this is the same guy before the Arsenal game he shouted out we're they're afraid we're not you know whatever I mean just and then they got absolutely oh my god I just love on his game notes he must just permanently have written this point one say the quiet part out loud keep doing it man keep doing it he's making a name for himself and that's what's important yeah there you go stand out in your quiet role make sure we're all talking about you look both teams have shiny new pieces four new boys given Spurs starts.

50:10$126 million worth of former Geordie icon Sandro Tonali. At home for the first time, booed with every touch by the Newcastle fans. Omar Marmouche, fresh arrived,$81 million, tried to show that a fresh start's what he needed. Another City reject, Nico Gonzalez. Lining up for the first time for Newcastle, I've got to say a lot of rippled match Tonali, muscle for muscle, in a first half in which Spurs, we should not forget, had all the chances. Created a lot, squandered a lot. And so cue just after the hour when the commentators started to talk about how this game had the record for no goalless draws.

50:4762 games. Hence Newcastle struck stunning, raking Nico Gonzalez dag on a long ball. Knocked down quite superbly by Anthony Alanga. He took it in stride. Two touches to spin like Fernando Mendoza. And that early left foot finish, I think, took Kinkski by surprise as he arced home. a cute beautiful delicious Thierry Henry celebration after scoring on the Spurs.

51:13Roger Bennett:Yeah a great finish and a great start to the season for Alangua who I actually think was a bit of a disappointment in his first season at Newcastle really seemed to struggle in a way that I don't think anyone anticipated because he looked, it made sense as a deal, he'd been good for Forrest he looked like he'd fit in with that team pretty perfectly didn't really happen last season but now he looks really settled looks like he's starting to deliver as Rog does Johan Wisser Yeah, I mean, this is it. When you say he didn't really deliver last season longer, you mean no goals in an entire campaign.

51:45And now two goals in his first two games this season. I'm going to get back to that motif in a moment because I think it's really important. Also, I'll say early hallmark of the Yeisler tenure. And we're going to say, this man does seem to have powers of revitalisation. Because 11 minutes later, from a toon corner, German substitutes, Eutonik Yao Ming, Nick Valtemarda, who I believe may be leaving us in this transfer window off to Juventus, but first touch, header down from a corner. And Wieser, another flat tire of a first season at Newcastle. As you say, this circus tumble of a flip was delicious.

52:19And now, two and two for him too. And it became, however you say, tops off in Geordie. The Toon fans got to sing all the hits. You should have stayed at a big club. They sang at Tonali. and it's happening again as they won incredibly their third straight game at Tottenham. We have to celebrate Newcastle for one second. So many people involved them in a pre-season relegation scrap prediction. They've started strong. Four points against Liverpool and Spurs. They've looked efficient. They've looked clinical. Lewis Miley, local hero, propelling all that's good. You look at Matthijs Yesler, 38-year-old, arrived from Al-Akhali in the Saudi Pro League.

52:58not exactly a traditional proving ground for Premier League managers. But I've got to say, that youth rule, it's almost like we have not quite adapted to the fact that Premier League managers now, they are young. This is a deeply stressful position. The dinosaur legends have gone. The pressure, the crucible, the model of the Premier League manager, it is a young man's game. Tactical brains needed. That is what modern Premier League football management is about now.

53:24Roger Bennett:Yeah, it's been German or Basque, under the age of 45, and looking quite good in a tight-fitting shirt. Those are the three key characteristics for all Premier League managers at this stage. I think Geisler, to be fair, Rog, I think Geisler's a weird case. He started his career at RB Salzburg. He's a coach who's come out of that Red Bull system that plays Red Bull football. High pressing, high energy, high intensity. And when he was at Salzburg, he was really well thought of. They talked about him even within the Red Bull kind of empire as this guy's a really promising coach. And I think if he'd gone from Salzburg maybe into Germany and then come to the Premier League, there would have been a lot more kind of, well, Newcastle have made a real, this is a real coup for Newcastle.

54:08Roger Bennett:This guy's clearly great. He's the up-and-coming, whether it's Klopp or Tuchel or Marco Rose or whoever, he's the next big star of German coaching. Jesse Marsh. Jesse Marsh. the weirdness is that he took the job in Saudi and i mean i i don't know why he took the job in Saudi it's always so hard to work out why people don't work in Saudi Arabia and football yeah why i presume i presume it's the climate by history yeah he just i mean it's the climate it's the um proximity to the Strait of Hormuz i don't know what it is that does it but the

54:46Roger Bennett:Geopolitics in history. What drew you to the Saudi League? I just want it to be close to the centre of action. Falconry. The falconry. It could well be the falconry. But I think what that does is it kind of made Yaisler, it kind of withdrew Yaisler from that trajectory that he seemed to be on. And what's really interesting about him, and I don't know whether this works with players as well, is that it doesn't seem to have affected his abilities. And I guess in Saudi Arabia, he has been coaching high quality players in a relatively low pressure environment. And he may well have been able to hone his abilities in a way that wouldn't have happened for him in Europe.

55:21Roger Bennett:It means that maybe we're underestimating how good a coach Matthias Yaisler is because he's had this unorthodox route to the Premier League. I see the same thing about him as we said about Liam Vecina into the first couple of games of his tenure when everything seemed to be absolutely astonishing. and we should judge this man after he's had his first back-to-back losses. How you handle in this league, the human darkness really defines you. But I love your point. Ultimately, it is looking great in a tight shirt, which is what football management is about right now. We'll save it for another show.

55:55But to do a handsome off in this Premier League is one of the hardest footballing conversations that we have to confront. Do you think, Rog,

56:02Roger Bennett:that there is now a prejudice against elderly managers? are they not getting are the ugly not getting a fair chance in the premier league i don't know because i believe beauty is on the inside so i don't even know who you're talking about fine and i think there is i mean the guendouzi rule that we've talked about in the past that certain footballers who just seem not fit for purpose do seem to make their way into the big leagues just because they look just like the just the epitome of a footballer you're saying that's now creeping into the managers game. Oh, well, I mean, that is an entirely serious point.

56:36Roger Bennett:There is no question that to get a job like that, you now have to look like the platonic ideal of a Premier League manager, which again is to do with looking good in a tight shirt and being either Bast or German. They're the two accepted nationalities now. I like a manager of a bit of a tummy. Give me Daniel Farker any time. For Spurs, oh, let me hug you Spurs fans. Two games, zero points. I think most disconcertingly, zero goals and many agonies. Stay with us, those Spurs fans. Yes, this is the first season which your team have lost first two games since 2012. But remember, you finished fourth that year.

57:14Also, first season going scoreless in two Premier League games since the first Premier League season. For Spurs fans, as well as you, the Spurs public address, man. You expected so much. and you should do, there is great talent in that squad role but now I think so many Spurs fans have like flipped and have just braced for the worst after losing to an opponent who also changed half their squad but suddenly looks so much more cohesive there are worrying rumbles, Roberto De Zerbe who is a very, very temperamental man already kind of soft launching, leaving he muttered at a post-game about the future He said, with me or another coach, and talked about, winners celebrate, losers explain, and I'm explaining, which is just an incredible line.

58:04That's a great line. I might get it on a T-shirt. I mean, is this a matter, Raw, of players needing time to bed in with a manager whose ideas are complicated and do take time? I looked at this game, Newcastle's goal scorers are almost a reminder of how long it can take. neither could make a dent in their first season both uh scoring freely it does take time or is there something in the dna at spurs which just means this club is totally cursed no to the last

58:30Roger Bennett:one i don't think there's a curse on tottenham it is interesting how some clubs and maybe some managers seem able to get a reaction quicker than others so yeah tottenham have been disappointing at the start of this season de serbi doesn't seem to have been able to gel all of those ingredients into like a team cake just yet it's still it's still coming together Gaisler has from to be honest much less promising circumstances he he was not adding players as he wanted to add players he was adding players just he'd lost better players I can't quite explain the alchemy of that and I think to an extent it probably is alchemy that it's just in Newcastle's case if you've got like an overriding motivation if you have something to fight for a point to prove maybe that gets you over that first like hump that first obstacle Deserby and Spurs don't have that but I I watched that game and at the end I felt more positive for Tottenham than I had after the Brentford game because they created chances they looked good I thought my I thought my moves played quite well you can see signs but it is a universal truth Rog that it's not just Spurs that if you sign a lot of players generally it takes a while they football's about relationships, it's about bonds those bonds aren't forged overnight and they're not forged in one pre-season so I think there has to be time and from what I saw against Newcastle compared to Brentford there are little signs of the bonds sort of taking hold it will not be a pleasant process and it won't necessarily be fun all the time and it certainly won't be like a straight trajectory but there's far too much quality in that team for this to last much longer I agree with that by the way, I agree with that more I can say next up for Tottenham Forest And then the good news, Everton.

1:00:11After that, the biannual North-South side off. Remember, Spurs fans, you've won exactly one home game in calendar year 2026. And that one was against Everton, of course. It stayed off relegation on the last day of last season. Here's a stat, Raw. You tell me if this is true or if I made it up completely. Tottenham Hotspur have now lost more league games at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium than Arsenal have at the Emirates. and of course Tottenham moved into their new stadium 13 years after Arsenal did.

1:00:40Roger Bennett:I think that must be true. Because? Because otherwise you wouldn't have made it up. Are you telling me I have a very limited creative mind? It would be a weird thing to make up, even in the service of the great god of content, Roger. I think it's probably not by much, but yeah, they have lost a lot at home in the last two years. Yeah, it is true, Roar. And I'll just say I'm going to crochet your little pillow. home, crap home Tottenham fans. But the beers, they fill upwards. I've got to also say, those two, those two Tottenham, the live casting, are they brothers or whatever? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:01:16I mean, they're just amazing. They're just, I do think the two of them, huge respect.

1:01:22Roger Bennett:They are comedy geniuses. They are adding to the enjoyment of human civilization. I think that's important. I think it's like they're just like constantly licking their fingers, sticking them in electric sockets. And it's just like, it's never not funny, lad. Two other games. Coventry 0, Hull City 1. Coventry lost last weekend 3-0 at Arsenal. Frank Lampard hinted they shouldn't be measured on that result. So how about this one then? This team spent more than$180 million this summer. I can't say they looked in the rain and the fog and the muck of Middle England. They looked incredibly limited. And so did Hull though, to be honest.

1:02:01Everyone who thought Hull might be tasty after that first United win tuned in this one. I think they'll be very confused. Hull were, let's say, gritty, but they didn't want the ball. Game obviously felt like a tree falling in an empty forest until 82nd minute, when Canadian international Liam Miller played two on goal by the excellent Mohamed Baloumi. He slapped home. Q, you've been mauled by the Tigers. Oh, sad Frank Lampard addition. Only three teams have ever been relegated from the top flight, having won their first two matches. Unfortunately, one was Hull in 2017. Ro, Luis scoring on the MIB Discord quipped, Hull are winning the league.

1:02:42Roger Bennett:Rory Smith, care to comment? They're not going to win the lead, but they're having a great time not winning it. That's all you can say about Hull City. There hasn't been a team that's been as written off before the start of the season for a little while as Hull. there tends to be kind of hope that pretty much everyone can survive. No one gave Hull a chance. They were great against Manchester United and I think the belief that will have given them is priceless. To then go to Coventry, a team they will regard as their rivals, to stay up and beat them is incredibly important. Hull probably need 36 points.

1:03:15Roger Bennett:They're already a sixth of the way there, I think. That's pretty good for the first two games. Quick note from GFOP Will Cheney. We're into menandblazers at gmail.com. Guys, on last week's show, Rory described Hull as a gloomy city stuck in the 1950s with an aquarium. So is it the English Monterey, California? It doesn't sound too bad. Also, the aquarium in Hull is just called The Deep, like Prince or Cher. Yeah, good aquariums go by one name only. What else would you call it? What? What's a good name for an aquarium? Well, it's not called the Hull Aquarium. No, it's called the Deep. It's much better.

1:03:56Roger Bennett:If you called it the Hull Aquarium, no one would doubt. It's actually a bit menacing. It is very menacing. It sounds like the kind of place you go to and you don't know if you're ever going to be seen again or if you're just going to be found in a smouldering car trunk burning in the parking lot of the Deep. And crucially, like all of Britain's buildings with ominous names, it can be used as a euphemism for something, a rule that also applies to the Shard. Is it an aquarium or is it a sex act? You tell us. By the way, I think Hull, Iowa is the hull of America, but I don't know. I've not been to Monterey, California.

1:04:29I'd love to do a live show there, but I still believe an aquarium's a toupee of public exhibitional spaces. Talking about toupees, Leeds won. Brentford won. Two incredibly ambitious teams looking to build on the momentum of opening weekend wins. The At Fortress leads. Brentford dominated the first half. If you've not seen this goal, just find the opener. 41st minute, smooth operator Kevin Sharder.

1:04:54Roger Bennett:I think the technical turn is a careless whisper of a flick, which he looped past James Trafford to make it 1-0. If you've not seen it, find it now. Your life will be better for just a sheer impudent invention of the whole thing. But second half, Daniel Farker rang in the changes, brought Ayo Tanaka and Harry Wilson, moved from three to a flat back four. Did they all reverse out? And Leeds surge. Something an equaliser by my mate. Beautiful, beautiful smelling Dominic Calvert-Lewin. One of my favourite interviews from pre-season where he talked, and it's in the show notes, the link, that he just wants to score goals for these normal blokes from Yorkshire because he is one.

1:05:35And with that, both teams stay unbeaten to start the season with four points off, two games raw. My favourite local headline of the week, bar none, is this one. It's a proper one. Something's gone terribly right at Leeds United.

1:05:49Roger Bennett:My favourite stat of the weekend, Rog, is this. That Dominic Calvert-Lewin is the only player to score in each of the last 11 Premier League seasons. Which, if you think about, A, his injury, like his reputation as being injury-prone, that really shows his consistency. And B, if you consider that he spent most of that playing for Everton, it shows his talent. He's the opposite. is the outlier to the Gwendoosie rule. He is both beautiful and forever potent. Sunderland won. Fulham nil. Last Monday night, Jamie Carragher predicted Sunderland might be relegation candidates this season, suggesting that they were, quote, arrogant.

1:06:31And they responded by defanging the club, who I actually do think are relegation contenders. I can say Fulham looked worryingly blunt. Wilson Isidore, Mr. Golden, chants after Trotty on as a substitute and then a turn within minutes to win it for the Black Cats. A home win at first time of asking. Tonight, Arsenal travel to Aston Villa for the Unai Emery Memorial Derby. Even for Villa Raw, with every single major player defecting, I think even if he knows he has one last breath left in him, Unai Emery would use that last breath to plot to beat the Arsenal.

1:07:07Roger Bennett:Yeah, he really likes beating Arsenal. And to be fair to him, his resources look a lot stronger this week than they did last week. Villa have been on a bit of a spree they've now signed an entire first 11 of players I think to reinforce a squad that have been left pretty bereft because of all those defections as you say it will take time same rule as De Zerbi same rule as Iriola this stuff takes time with loads of new players there's probably been more change than they would have wanted in fact I know there's been more change than they would have wanted and they would have expected it feels to me a little bit like the darkness is sort of lifting over Villa but it will take time we'll break down the repercussions of that game in our new big weekend preview show launching this Thursday in which we're all we'll be joined on a weekly basis by our great friend from World Cup Night Cup Fitz Humphrey Carr Busboys Reunite that's amazing news Rod you hadn't talked I'm learning this just for the first time it feels like you should have warned me that's wonderful news I'd be delighted to spend some time with Humphrey again on a weekly basis you could have you could have obviously you could fake joyful emotion that's amazing actually maybe no it's probably better that it's authentic isn't it really yeah just like oh god him again you told me that last week I had to carry him for the whole World Cup is that what you're telling me I was telling somebody the other day about how one of my favourite shows of the World Cup was when he went on a five minute riff about keeping someone in his basement mine was when he went on a five minute riff about his hobby of painting model soldiers yes yeah he does love that that is one of his things but that's great news Rod that's very exciting who doesn't now we'll have three people tuning in we must wrap we're Bournemouth 1 Everton Football Club won and despite the opening victory of last weekend the vibes at Everton I mean this is modern football so dark lack of a right back reports that Everton were about to sell one of their best young prospects local teen Harrison Armstrong caused Everton fans to sing throughout the game don't sell Armstrong Harrison Armstrong you're gonna have a riot on your hands Raw some transfer negotiations are done in the boardroom others are done via slightly menacing fan chants triggering tweets like this one at Alicia Russo's My mum is the luckiest ever fan ever in and in brackets, dead.

1:09:22Roger Bennett:I'm not saying you should threaten to riot, Rog. But it is quite nice that the fans have kind of made it clear that they do have a say in kind of what a club should be and the decisions a club should make. That's not a terrible thing. I think for Everton, as for Liverpool, to have at least one local representative is really genuinely important. And ultimately, they've kind of forced a climb down, haven't they? Because Harrison Armstrong is no longer signing for Nottingham Forest. Yeah, by the way, fans should start chanting, can we get cheaper hot dogs in the cafeteria? Football, though, thank God smothers that.

1:09:56Harrison Armstrong did start. Everton began with confidence. Former New England Rev goalkeeper Petrovic made all the saves, including one, I crap you not, off his testicle bag, which he didn't even flinch off. All of which meant, of course, the War Cherries would open the scoring. Bournemouth under Marco Rosa still carry that DNA of Andoni Arola. They're fast on the counter. You don't know you're dead till you're feeling the body bag zipped around you. Stroke a half-time. God, this goal was so good, it almost didn't hurt. The excellent Ryan Sprangev and Nielsen charging down the flank, fed to Alex Scott.

1:10:31He sent Mikalenko out for, I think it was a chicken key. Every fate one way went the other, Lashlow in the corner. It was such an intelligent goal by a man once known as Guernsey Grealish. I think he's one of the most inventive, creative, coveted footballers outside of the big six. Chelsea said to be amongst those celebrating. His celebration roar, which he's done before, where he puts the phone down, it's now going to be interpreted by Bournemouth fans as if it's a Zapruder film for the next 48 hours.

1:10:59Roger Bennett:Yeah, but the issue is that there's actually a lot of scam calling in Britain at the moment. Is there really? Yeah, that you get these people ringing up asking for your insurance details or whatever. And it might just be that Alex Scott's been played by them, because I know I have been. So it might be more social commentary than about his future. Oh, he wasn't talking about whether he's going to Chelsea, he's talking about spam callers. He doesn't want people getting a hold of his number and trying to get his banking details. Nigerian scammers, I gave you the money once. They're not even Nigerian.

1:11:25Roger Bennett:They're local homegrown scammers. God, come on. I mean, if they're not Nigerian, don't waste your time. I either want the creme de la creme coming at me, or I'm just not interested. Britain can no longer import top-quality scammers. We have to produce... Is that how far the empire's forward? That's how bad things have gone. No, I think it presumably was a thing about I'm not leaving. I lied. I don't know where you stand on this. How do you feel about mime being brought into football celebrations? I'm pro. I didn't. I watch football for the mime. Other people watch for the goals, the passes, just the tactics.

1:11:57The transfers. I'm just there, ultimately. It's like, for me, it's like they talk about NHL being fights with games of hockey welded on. I'm there for the mime with occasional flickers of football, which, frankly, I'm not that interested in at this point.

1:12:10Roger Bennett:In the transfer window, I think all goal stores should have to make it clear through the medium of interpretive dance what their latest transfer situation is. How much they're available for. Yeah, if they're considering a move, they should have to act out uncertainty. And what clauses they need to bolt onto their contract so that they'll accept the club terms. I love, I love, I love. Second half. I did watch, I will admit, in quite a hope-fritted funk. These are my real game notes rule. I'm crapping you not. I wrote, first of all, I hate watching football. Premier League is fully back. I wrote, Mikalenko is a terrorist against our cause, which makes me sound like an 11-year-old.

1:12:51I wrote, can Everton do a Man City and make Bournemouth wobble late? No, because these words preceded imminent death. Everton want to bring on Beto, which the commentator said. I miss you, Beto, by the way. We made a tribute video to you. If it is true that you're leaving for Fiorentina, I adore you. Last week I talked about watching the Bournemouth game. I wrote this into my show notes. Bournemouth are an extraordinary, well-run club. It's just remarkable, the culture and mindset from top to bottom. they proceeded to leak too late so i did this again like a child roar i wrote it 10 times in these game notes to see if it would happen again and it did i know what can you just explain that

1:13:34Roger Bennett:man i mean it did the only obvious explanation is that you have some sort of declarative power of the universe is that is that where we're going to with this i mean is it not genuinely rationally is it not the only i mean there's no other explanation anybody playing ballmouth fans have given you the greatest gift. They may never win a game, but one minute Everton were looking at their lose away in the first game of the season for a fifth straight campaign, which is bleak the next. And by the next, I mean not your first moment. Cherries have a core weakness, corners. We took advantage. 22 times they've conceded from set pieces more than anybody else in the Premier League.

1:14:10And beautiful James Tarkovsky swooped on slot, lashed home and everything raw. Can I just say, it just flipped. One minute I was like fuming, sitting in my own kind of muck. And the next I was up hugging, dancing with my kid again. And everything felt like I love football again.

1:14:29Roger Bennett:And that's the effect that James Tarkovsky has on all of us, Rog. Isn't it pathetic? What a fickle human being I am. Look, only Everton can feel lucky and unlucky at the final whistle. Everton's situation remains horribly volatile. David Moyes quite brilliantly, quite twisting the knife in his Cold War with the owners post-game. Showed he's at odds with his board. He came up with this incredible quote. He was asked, you know, about the situation. He said, all I can say is the managers in Evertonian, which has just completely buckled him to the fan base once again. And that big question, pre-season for us, which is where we compared Everton's Strikeforce 2, the hyena's pseudo-penis, it all feels way, way off right now.

1:15:13Raw. Balogun currently linked. Richarlison maybe coming back raw, who says you can never come home again?

1:15:19Roger Bennett:Well I was going to say to you Rog that this could potentially be quite a good couple of days for Everton, the fact that they've left it so late to strengthen the squad I find baffling in the same way as I find that baffling of Liverpool and Manchester City and various other teams you don't have to run it to the deadline but if the transfer window does shut with Beto at Fiorentina which would be a sad loss to us all but with Richarlison and Balogun and potentially Kenny Tete, the Fulham right back as a kind of reinforcement there They've looked at Olerina as well at Forest. That's not bad, is it?

1:15:49Ritchie Beck, Balogun is an upgrade, I think.

1:15:52Roger Bennett:That kind of makes sense. Oh, I mean, some of this is so fantastical. Like Balogun at Everton, I can't even just compute what human wonder that would feel like in this moment with the fusion of Everton and America once more. But I do think ultimately fans, this is not about Everton, but we're going to get to this overall as we hit this new feature, the sentiment table. I think we'd love to fume. I do believe if your football team is the worst thing in your life, your life's pretty bloody good. I do want to say again, Beto leaving for Fiorentina. I was so moved by this news. I was so shocked by how much I cared.

1:16:29I love that man. Less for his football, more for how he approaches football. We're releasing a tribute video today, so I'll leave it to that. Rumours fly early and die. He's off to Spurs. Sad to say goodbye to a truly maverick surrealist who became, I think the manifestation of the joy and freedom that all football fans want to see on the field. I also loved him because of what he did on the field. My dad, no longer with us, but he was the kind of player that my dad loved. And I loved watching him because I always heard my dad say, Oh, love, I love Lee and I, even though my dad never got to see him play at his peak for Everton.

1:17:01That is the joy of football, making those who are no longer with you speak that narrative during games. And talking about what fans want, so let's buckle this with a question roar, which we're going to do every week. We know who's top of the table. Manchester City as we pod, as we all expected, Hull in second. But I was to ask you for a fan sentiment table. Who are the top three happy fan bases and who are the bottom three wallowing in their misery? Give us the Rory Smith sentiment table. Who's walking on sunshine? Who's choking on doom?

1:17:32Roger Bennett:Well, part of it is obviously related to the lead table itself. And I think at the top, you have to have Hull City. Hull City are in a wonderful mood for all sorts of reasons, not least how unexpected it is. I think up with them, and obviously we're recording this before the Villa game, but even if Arsenal were to lose that game, I think their fans would still be second because they are still champions. They're still in the warm afterglow of winning that title. They have the strongest squad in the league. They are overwhelming favourites to retain their championship. Everything is going well in Arsenal land.

1:18:05Roger Bennett:And third, I'd have Brentford, who could easily have won at Leeds on Sunday. They should have had a penalty, if we're all completely honest. But they look like they are set fair for another brilliant season in the Premier League. They are well organised, they're flexible, they're adaptable. Keith Andrews is really kind of smart and inventive with the way he gets his team to play. They've made some great signings. This isn't just a good time to be a Brentford fan. It is the best time there has ever been to be a Brentford fan. That's worth something. My top three, Hull, Chelsea. I think this feeling of fun is absolutely intoxicating.

1:18:36And Newcastle United, the relief, the sense of joy, the sense of going down south and doing one is absolutely a bully. And your bottom three.

1:18:47Roger Bennett:I'd have Spurs, just for the fear that the massive spending the summer hasn't really changed their fortunes, that they still do look vulnerable. That question mark over whether De Zerbe will be able to kind of turn them into something else this season. I think you'd probably have to have Fulham. You mentioned that they're kind of a team you've earmarked as a relegation candidate. I'm exactly the same. that's what we said in our pre-season preview pods they don't look strong enough to put up much of a fight as things stand I think they're about to sign another kind of youth player from Real Madrid I don't know how much I liked that strategy overall and then bottom and maybe this is just a little bit self-indulgent Rog I think Liverpool and that's because of the giant colossal estuary between expectation and reality the fact that it feels as though Iriola who's a coach that I think most fans are pretty excited about it feels even though as we've been recording they have confirmed the signing of Bradley Barcola it just feels like he doesn't have a squad that's fit for purpose and that is very much on the hierarchy I have Liverpool Everton we love the few and then Spurs and I'm saying that remember as someone that Spurs curious okay you tell us how are you feeling for real all of those fans in the chat but let's finish with a letter from our mailbag menandblazers at gmail.com it's incredible to hear from an icon Iconic GFOP, Stephen Thorne, who wrote a beautiful letter.

1:20:08Roger Bennett:Rod, do the honours. I was pondering the similarities between Pep Guardiola's and Enzo Morescu's appearance and laughing at the number of friends over the weekend who asked me, didn't Pep retire during the Manchester City game? It made me wonder if there was a phrase that described the idea that someone's appearance determined their behaviour, success, ETC. Of course there is. We've touched on this already, Rog. If you're German and looked within a tight shirt, you're a Premier League manager. From my Jane Austen reading days, I remembered physiognomy and it turns out that there is, in fact, an idea called physiognomic determinism.

1:20:37Roger Bennett:Not that we need more pseudoscientific ideas introduced and reintroduced in 2026 on the internet. That's up to you. But here we are. That's the main strategy for Manchester City this year. Physiognomic determinism. Look like Pep. Coach like Pep. More than you believe. Oh, raw. If that was true, I'd be, like, incredibly successful. A slightly pasty-faced English. I'd say a possible stunt double for Pep. To be honest, I once shook Pep's hand last time I saw him, and as he clenched my fist, I realised our arms, like they couldn't be connected to two more different bald men, mentally and physically.

1:21:12But Ro, you're our resident phenologist. Care to comment?

1:21:15Roger Bennett:So I would instinctively flip this, Rog, and I'd say that in most cases it's not physiognomic determinism, but the opposite is the fact that someone who's a politician makes us think that's what politicians look like, for example. But I am struck by how much Maresta looks like Pep. I don't know if I'd call it physiognomic determinism, but I do wonder whether before the end of the season someone might use the term, not me, Rog, not me, someone might use the term the talented Mr Ripley about Enzo Moresca. A lot of people after week one think he's actually leaning into it and acting in peppy in ways, you know, post-game going up to his players and publicly coaching them up on the field in ways that Guardiola have made famous.

1:21:54Roger Bennett:It is really eerie. The whole thing is how much he looks, behaves, like moves like Guardiola. Do you think there's an element that he might be doing if he thinks that's what he has to do at City? I don't know. Well, you know, Slott made it very clear he was not going to do any of the cloppian anything. And we saw what happened to him. So this is maybe the different approach to exactly what they say mannerism-wise. I do find it fascinating. In politics, there is a sheer belief amongst pollsters that a bald man can never be elected president of the United States of America. But is there too virile?

1:22:30Yeah, exactly. No. Americans, after Kennedy beat Nixon, just being so telegenic, you just, as a bald, you immediately... I mean, it's terrible, that. It's like you can't become president if you weren't born here. You can't become president if you're bald. I mean, you can't do a handball if it's... I don't even know anymore. Bollywood A had an incredible line about Tesco Pep. He said, Pep's successor at City, Enzo Maresca, is like the Coolio to his Tupac. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw that, but then I preferred Coolio, so. You did?

1:23:04Roger Bennett:Yeah. It's the paradise, underrated. Yeah, massive. It was just an absolute bannier. No question about that. It is a, I think we said this before, didn't we? It's a really bold strategy, not just to kind of use the visionary guru as your inspiration, but to actively try and look like him is bold, Rog. It's really bold. Yeah, I actually think Enzo is more like the stellar lefty to peps no occur. GFOPs, you tell us what you think. Be in touch with us. The email is, as always, meninblazers at gmail.com. That is it for today. Where are you off to this week, Raw? I don't know yet, actually, Rog, to be fair.

1:23:40Roger Bennett:I'm not sure. I've still got a choice to make. It's quite a good weekend of fixtures. God, suspense is killing me. We're filming with Tyreek George and Ben White. Oh, my God. Oh, gym tan and laundry. We'll be back Thursday for a very special version of Big Weekend Preview. This is Rog saying let's not take a second of watching football together for granted. And courage.