Premier League humbled in Europe, nightmare nights for Spurs and Chelsea goalkeepers, and Champions League second legs: European Nights 03/17/26

0:00You're listening to the Men in Blazers Media Network, Suboptimal Radio. English Premier League, nine teams in Europe, one win, five losses, three draws. We're really the best league in the world? Money can't buy your love, Rog. Two London clubs give surprise starts to two debut goalkeepers, darkness ensues. Was there any reason for this act of self-destruction? Sometimes it's nice to feel things. Like being alive. who will win the Royal Rumble the former Real Madrid bosses Rafa Benitez Panathinaikos or Manuel Pellegrini's Real Betis in the Europa League Great atmosphere two teams in green what more do you want I think this one's one for Pellegrini

0:50It's European night Roger and Roury ahead of the second leg of the last 16 of the Champions League Europa League and Conference League. And what a match week we just lived through, Raw. One that gave us a whole new meaning to Brexit. Oh, we'll get to that in one second. First, Real Madrid versus Manchester City. A game that was a sequel to the sequel of a sequel that lived up to the hype about the same way as the Godfather 3 did. 3-0 Real Madrid romp that was over before the 45-minute mark. Pre-kick-off, thick with a pungent centre-pep tactics. He trotted out a line-up. It looked like it was stolen from Mike Leach's Texas Tech playbook.

1:25Four forwards, Haaland, Savino, Semenyo and Doku. To mention forward-pressing full-back Nico O 'Reilly. We know what happened, Roar. City opened potently, but they then withered. A Federico Valverde hat-trick. That third goal, just utterly exquisite. Did Pep overthink this one as he so often charged in Champions League mishits? Or did he simply get out-coached? By the no-retreat, no-sherenda Alvaro Albaloa. I do like the fact, Rog, that Pep Guardiola is the only manager in the world, possibly in football history, who loses games because he's too clever. that is the ultimate compliment to paid Wadiola.

1:58He got the line-up wrong. It was too open. His ambition, apparently, his aim was to win the game in the first leg, to try and get the tie done and dusted. Because he'd looked at Real Madrid and thought, well, they're weak. They're missing Jude Bellingham, Kylian Mbappe, David Alaba, Edemir Littau, all these players weren't there. Their form has been patchy in the lead. Aboloa is a rookie manager. he must have thought it's all there for me to go to Madrid and I don't think win like 5-6-0 but maybe win 3-1 blow them out the water make the second leg of formality hold them at bay maybe rest a few players ahead of the Carabao Cup final with Arsenal and the problem with all of that is that it runs into Real Madrid on a Champions League night and there's just no accounting for it so yeah in those first 10 minutes you looked at City and thought okay they're going to break through at some point they look really threatening Madrid were teetering and then they get one break they have one brilliant finish from Valverde and the whole mood around everything changes and suddenly there's loads of space.

2:59There's no cover. There's no assistance for Rodri in the midfield. City are being overrun every time Real go forward. By half-time the game is over and the second half becomes an exercise in damage limitation and making sure City have something to play for. I don't know whether he overthought it. I think he just called it wrong. I want to give huge thanks to Bank of America, official bank of US soccer and the FIFA World Cup 2026 for supporting the men in blazes media network. Discover what's possible in sports and in life. What would you like the power to do? Bless, almost a new quasi-trope for Erling Haaland.

3:34Impotent, held shotless for the first time ever in a Champions League game since he joined the club in 2022. Also, already the second time this calendar year, he's been blanked on shots as just three goals all competitions in 2026. someone get that man a glass of raw milk is this a Haaland problem or is it really a larger systems problem for Manchester it does seem like Pep can't quite square the circle of playing all of his new signings and keeping the big man fed within that system it's a really tricky one isn't it because I guess you could say that Haaland is service dependent he needs players who can provide him with the chances that he finishes regularly he's entitled to not be quite as prolific all of the time everyone has peeps and troughs in their form which would make you think that it's a system issue that basically the system's not working and Harland is the is the kind of avatar of that system breaking down but then is there another argument that actually the issue is that Harland is off form this is a team that has been built to service him and therefore if he's not playing particularly well if he's not being quite as deadly as we've become used to that the whole system falls apart he is so maybe it's a system problem Rog but he is the system maybe that is the problem that City have got.

4:48The story of the Real Madrid first leg, of course, Federico Valverde, the Uruguayan, who Trent Alexander-Arnold was quick to call undoubtedly the most underrated footballer on the planet. His first-off hat-trick was honestly part football, but part performance art. It was stunning. The pièce de résistance, that 42nd-minute poem of a goal. I mean, I watch a lot of football. I do feel like I'm dead inside. I got out of my seat and applauded thousands of miles away. and I know I wasn't alone, a Brian Diaz flick into the box, Fede with a touch that can only be described as wizard filth, rainbow over the head of a quite befuddled Mark Gehi, volleying home with the smoothness of Uruguayan Yerba Mate.

5:30Valverde stole the headlines, deservedly so, but it was the names we didn't see that may own the long-term narrative coming into this game. There was no Mbappe on the field. There was no Jude Bellingham. Five players, 21 and younger, were on that field, including the three starters, Dean Housen, Arda Gula and Thiago Pittarch. Our old friend Trent, again, he turned into quite the quote machine. He said, a lot of people just expected us to get battered. But as we all know, when it comes to the Champions League, Real Madrid are often, but kind of always, the ones who knock. So, Roy, you've got Kylian.

6:06One minute they're watching in the stands, Kylian's back in the squad. But they know Real Madrid made sense last week. What do we make of that? Alvaro Albalo has said the mission is for Mbappe to be back for the second leg today. But is that a good thing for this Real Madrid? Do they secretly work better without the Superstar? It can't be a bad thing because it's killing Mbappe. And especially in the circumstance of this game, if you've got one of the best, fastest, most dangerous strikers in the world, one of the best players of his generation up front, that will make you more dangerous on the break.

6:41but you are right Rog that in that game against City what you saw was a balanced team it was a team that Arbeloa could name because Bellingham wasn't there because Mbappe wasn't there that that kind of fitted together where you could play maybe players who aren't as talented as them but you could play them in positions that they understood where they could kind of make the most impact and that's always the battle for any Real Madrid manager and it's the battle for Arbeloa is how do you try and craft a side that has some sort of inner coherent logic to it out of resources that are not built to do that.

7:13They're signed, those players, because they're talented and famous and glamorous, and your job is to try and make it make sense. So I often think that, in Real Madrid's case, one injury sometimes is a bit of an advantage. You don't want it to be serious, obviously. No one wants anyone being long-term hurt, but sometimes it helps if the manager's hand is forced. It gets harder and more kind of risky to make those calls when everybody is fit. that's the really dangerous thing is if you go into a game and think actually the best thing to do is to start this game without Mbappe or without Vinicius or without Bellingham that tends not to mean you last very long as Real Madrid manager so it may well be that having Mbappe back for this game is an advantage longer term maybe makes our below's life a bit more complicated now you saw that with Valverde the hat trick obviously got the headlines but it was his work spelling supporting um you know covering for Trent Alexander-Orland in key moments that really, really bloody impressed me.

8:12But we need to zoom out for one big second, Raw, because there's been so much talk about the Premier League as our trademark best league in the world. In a historic night in which six English teams were in the round of 16, the road to the Champions League final looked like it was paved with chip butties. But that's until the rest of Europe went on Norman Conquest on our... And as we all know, no wins from any of those six British clubs in the Champions League, last week. Only Newcastle and Arsenal escape withdrawals, while Chelsea, City and lowly Tottenham were humiliated. Liverpool beaten in Turkey.

8:49In fact, Chelsea's collapse at PSG, City's Madrid disaster, were the first time ever two English teams have lost by three or more goals in a single day in the history of either the European Cup or the Champions League. If we told Opta the Spurs also lost by three goals the day before, their computers probably will explode. Best quote to emerge from the rubble of last week was from Villa manager Roger Unai Emery, who simply said, wow. Lots of reasons given. In the tabloid postmortems of fatigue, the fact the Premier League teams kick the crap out of each other week in, week out, so they're actually shattered by the back end of the season, whereas the European teams in the weaker leagues that they dominate are still relatively box fresh.

9:29But there's something more is in the raw. You know, a week after the smoke's cleared, how do you understand it? There's a lot of stuff going on, I think, Rog, is the short answer. So part of it is that you have to remember that, all right, six teams in the Champions League. Arsenal, a one-all draw at Leverkusen. It wasn't a great performance. It's not a great result. But it is an away draw in the Champions League and there is nothing wrong with that. That sets Arsenal up to go through. Newcastle, with a better side against Barcelona, will have been very disappointed not to win and only drew because of, what, a last-minute, 94th-minute penalty after the end of the allotted injury time.

10:02So again, not a bad result. Spurs are rubbish. That's why they got beaten heavily by Atletico Madrid because they're not very good. They are the team 16th in the Premier League. It's not a massive surprise that they went to Atleti and got beaten heavily. The way they did it was unusual, but the outcome, maybe not a shock. I'd say the same for Liverpool. Liverpool are not very good. Liverpool had the decency to go to De La Tassaray and play in exactly the same way as they did when they went to De La Tassaray earlier this year with exactly the same outcome. There was a great tweet from someone complaining that TNT Sports had accidentally shown the game from September again, which I really enjoyed.

10:40TNT Sports being the broadcaster here for the Champions League. And I guess that leaves you with Chelsea and City. Chelsea were playing the European champions and to be honest, matched them for 75 minutes. And City, all right, that one's fair. Guardiola gets it wrong. Real Madrid kind of tear away from them. But even then you need an incredibly good Federico Valverde hat-trick. So there are kind of individual circumstances. is but the broader pattern I think is true that if you look back over the last 10-15 years of the Champions League the Premier League's got so much more money than everybody else that it feels like it's not really enough that only three English teams have won it since 2013 that is unusual given the dominance that the league has economically I think it's taken 10 out of 40 semi-final slots in the last 10 years which isn't a bad record at all but again it doesn't really kind of bear out this idea that the Premier League is the Super League.

11:32And I think fatigue plays a part in that. I think the stylistic difference in the Premier League over this year and last year is maybe a bit thin as well, that I'm not sure how well set up English teams are to play against sides who want to play football anymore. They're not used to it. And that, I think, is a challenge for them. I mean, I wrote about this in our newsletter last week. The Premier League, we've talked about it week in, week out. It's become almost a wasteland for open players. It is trench warfare as football. And suddenly, last week, we saw face the creativity, the spontaneity of opponents like Valverde, Dembele, Varadona, Griezmann.

12:10These teams look shell-shocked, flat-footed. It's almost like the Premier League clubs have been grappling away with each other in their jiu-jitsu dojos, working on the ground game. And they forgot that in Europe, aka in the real world, someone can just kick you in the downblows. Premier League is richer, as you say. The teams are better. The squads are deeper. But we're less reliant on individual brilliance than ever. And faced with that weapon, individual brilliance, like all these teams were in moments last week, we looked truly, truly outclassed. So the question for you is, what happens? Where does England go from here?

12:47As a Premier League, have we cannibalised ourselves out of dominating the continent because of the style we play? Do we have to change so that we can dominate in the Champions League? Or will we eventually drag the other Europeans down and wrestle in the mud with us? That's what I thought would be really interesting about the knockout rounds of the Champions League was would England's kind of set-piece approach basically work to grind its way through Europe? And you saw that really clearly in the first couple of games last week. The referees have decided it's not going to happen because the glee with which the continent's finest officials were pointing out fouls in the penalty area.

13:24I don't know if there's an official thing gone out, like an edict, or whether it's just kind of culturally accepted. They're not going to let them do that. They're not going to stand for all the pushing and the shoving and the blocking that we see week in, week out in the Premier League. What happens, I don't know. I think Miguel Delaney, my friend and yours, Rog, made a really good point in the Independent last week that because Premier League squads have to be built for that war of attrition that the domestic league is, they tend not to have massive superstars. Liam Rossini said the Premier League doesn't have a Desiree Dwey, it doesn't have an Ousmane Dembele, it doesn't have a Kvitsa Tverest-Gellier.

14:01Players of that individual talent, they're still at PSG, they're still at Barcelona, they're still at Real Madrid, they're still at Bayern Munich in the form of Michael Alisse, who might be the most informed player in Europe at the moment. you can't run players on those contracts in the Premier League because you need to spend that money across three, four, five players because you have so many games, they're so physical, the fatigue is so great so it might be that this is kind of what we have now is what we will have in the next five or ten years which is the Premier League is without question the strongest league in the world it will send five or six teams to the Champions League every year they will sail through the group phase and then once they run into the absolute elite continental teams, the playing field is much more level.

14:43And I think part of that is to do with style. The Griezmann flick for Julien Alvarez's last goal for Atletico Madrid, I can't remember the last time I saw something like that in the Premier League. I think that will genuinely have surprised Tottenham's defenders because he didn't bring it down and run it to the flank and set play again. He did something inventive and spontaneous. But I wonder whether the other thing that we ignore a little bit is the economics of it. because the Premier League is the richest lead in the world, but the four richest clubs in the world are Paris Saint-Germain, Real Madrid, Barcelona and Bayern Munich.

15:14So maybe it's not a surprise that when the Premier League sides reach this bit of the Champions League and they start playing those teams, those ones can match them. Rory Darmus, it is time to spoiler alert with predictions. Let's go to these English teams, the precious ones who are left in the Champions League. You tell me, are they going through to the next round? Yes or no? Are you ready? I am ready. We'll start with Manchester City, Real Madrid. Doku, for his part, still believes. He said they scored three goals against us. Why can't we? Pep Gordiola sounded slightly less optimistic. He said the chances of a comeback were not much.

15:49Keep your chin up, Pep. What do you think, Roar? Can City pull off the miracle? Early goal, restorative performance, great atmosphere, ultimate failure. I think City go out, but I think they go out narrowly. Next, a nightmare on Tudor Street. It's on the Motspur, which we'll get to more in depth in a minute. Will they see the light of the next round? Why am I even asking? No. Sneaky under the radar team right now. Newcastle United poised 1-1 with Barcelona going into the Camp Nou. Probably deserve to win that game more. They were the better side. They will go to Camp Nou with confidence. But I think they'd go out 2-1 to a soft penalty.

16:32Club World Cup champion Chelsea bring their circle in the centre spot. Stylings down and out in Paris and London. High store in draw at Stamford Bridge, but I think Chelsea go out. We all know the answer to this one in my heart, but my head has to ask. Liverpool 1-0 down from that away leg at Galatasaray. Galatasaray win 2-1 at Anfield. Liverpool go out. Everyone forgets that all this game is for is to work out who PSG put out in the quarters. God, are you really, are you just now starting to say Liverpool? but you're doing a me with Liverpool football. Rog, you keep achieving this, but last Friday, you said this again, and you were like, oh, you're only predicting that Spurs will win at Anfield because you're trying to be too negative.

17:13What goes and happens? Spurs should have won at Anfield. A draw that felt like a loss, and the big one, Arsenal. Gasp, outset, pieced by Bayer Leverkusen in that first leg, a 1-1 draw. Yeah, I think Arsenal will go through. the sole English representative in the quarter-finals will be Arsenal, who will win, I think, quite easily against Bayern Leverkusen. There you have it. It is written. We just save you the hours of heartbreak having to watch all those games. You're welcome. Manchester City host Real Madrid today, March 17th, 4pm Eastern Time. We'll be back to delve into two of these games in deeper, deeper probings.

17:51Ask who'd even want to be a goalkeeper after the break.

17:58Like everything in life, you can choose how to see the situation. So you can stay and cry or you can fight magic on the club, like black magic and this and other b****, you know. That was for now. Spurs manager Igor Tudor saying, you can cry or you can fight. Remember, those are the only two options. Choose tears. It's the only way to get through the day. But the human agony of the first leg of the round of 16 when Tottenham visited Atletico Madrid. Tudor opted to give out the blue. Then 22-year-old Antonin Kinski, his Champions League debut and his first start since October. As you say, it was a whirlwind.

18:39Minute five, Kinski slipped, kicking the ball off his left foot and Atleti pounced. A few minutes later, Micky van der Ven slipped. Seeing a theme here, Anton Griezmann scored the very next minute. Kinski slipped again, assisting Julian Alvarez for the fastest any team has been down 3-0 in a Champions League knockout game. 15 minutes, Kinski buried his head in the grass, prone face down. It's hard to watch, even as Alvarez scored. And he howled in frustration as the substitute board was read with his number on it. First starting to remove his gloves and then wiping away his tears as Vicario replaced him on 17 minutes.

19:20Tying the fastest a goalkeeper has ever been pulled in a Champions League knockout. It was hard to watch him trudge down the tunnel. Three of his teammates following after him to console the young man. Honestly, humanly harrowing for anyone capable of a jot of empathy. Former Manchester City and England goalkeeper Joe Hart said, it broke my heart. An agony to witness, let alone experience. I can't imagine what went through his mind, what went through his veins, what went through as he sat there in the locker room in the wake of that. I get a little choked up just thinking about it days later, Roar.

19:56Can you describe that surreal, crushing cocktail of emotions that this moment brought up for you? Yeah, it was intensely awkward, intensely difficult, incredibly painful to watch because none of us have ever been Champions League goalkeepers. None of us have ever been professional footballers. But I think it doesn't take a huge amount to realise what it would feel like to have something that you must have wanted for so long play out that badly and then to have the humiliation of being withdrawn. And the actual decision of withdrawing him, I think is slightly more complex than it was presented as.

20:30I think there was a case to be made that Tudor did the right thing in taking him off. It's not necessarily what I'd have done, but I can understand the logic behind it. That it could even be seen as kind, I think is not impossible. But for Kinski himself in that moment, you just kind of think what he must have been, as you say, like in the locker room, just playing it through in his head over and over and over again and if anyone in in any form of their life has ever just had a real kind of nightmare kind of professionally privately just something has happened that has been trying to embarrass you to your core to have to sit and wallow in that humiliation is is brutal and how he recovers from it i don't actually agree that it has to be kind of a career killer or that you know a lot of the reaction over here certainly when it happened was, well, that's Antonin Kinski done.

21:18Effectively, he will now have to retire. I think that's totally overblown. I think he can recover. I'm sure he will recover. I really hope he does recover. But for a long time, that moment is going to haunt him. And kind of getting over it will be an incredible psychological test. I mean, let's talk about that response. Because the whole thing has been fascinating to witness Tudor defended his decision to start Kinski and the substitution, saying that he had to, quote, protect the lad. He offered no solace or even a glance as Kinski went off. Said later, didn't want to hug him just in case it didn't go well.

21:50And that would become a talking point. But nature abhors a vacuum. And so does the goalkeepers union, which kicked into gear almost instantly. David De Gea, now a Fiorentina, but he spent 12 years. By the way, with his own share of incredibly tough moments as Manchester United goalkeeper, immediately posted online, no one who hasn't been a goalkeeper can understand how difficult it is to play in this position. Keep your head up and you will go again. De Gea began his career at Atletico Madrid. Real Madrid goalkeeper Thibaut Courtois came to prominence. He Instagrammed DM Kinski to offer his support.

22:27Couldn't hit to him, quote, Atletico's pitch causes problems for every team, every being in all caps. Paul Robinson, former Spurs and England goalkeeper, called it, quote, confidence-destroying Peter Schmeichel. Denmark and Manchester United legend was incredibly explicit on Paramount's coverage. He blamed Tudor for, quote, killing Kinski's career, going on to say that's going to have ramifications for the rest of his career. This will be a moment that everybody in football will always remember every time they see or hear his name. A bit like Laureus Karius, if you want an example of that. raw um all of this fallout layers upon layers mostly driven by goalkeepers reacting to this moment we know this must have been one of the worst set of well 70 minutes of the young gents life what stood out to you about the coverage of this moment this kid who turned 23 just this past friday the 13th i've got to say roger i the sympathy i think there was a real it was really notable how how quickly everybody not just goalkeepers but led by the goalkeepers pointed out how tough this experience would have been for Kinski it was it was actually quite a humane response in lots of ways there was blame directed at Tudor not just for the not just for playing him then removing him after 17 minutes but particularly for not going to him as he came off the pitch I think that was the thing that really really struck people was that Tudor didn't seem to to want to empathize or commiserate with him at all that that looked an awful lot like a like a sort of abdication of responsibility and i know he's explained that and again you can kind of see the logic but i think i think that's the wrong call but there was a lot of sympathy for kinsey because i what he went through was so obviously harrowing that it hits something in your core you can understand how awful that would be to go through even though you have never lived through anything like it, you know that that feeling of humiliation and embarrassment and sadness and sorrow is so kind of deep and painful.

24:31You know what that feels like and you've got to see it play out on your television screen. Summed up by Joe Lazo on Twitter who said, if I had a nickel for every time a London club started their second choice goalkeeper in the Champions League knockouts and it backfired this week, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, which is true, because Chelsea went and started 23-year-old Swede, Philipp Jorgensen, and it went well. Well, for 74 minutes, the game tied it to all. Really competent, cagey, prudent away performance in the Champions League against the holders, and then with Jorgensen playing the ball out of the back, we were told he was so good with his feet.

25:13Paris Saint-Germain's ferocious pressing came, and the ball out to Vitinha, who produced, as Barney, Rene and the Guardian put it, quote, a finish that felt like a moment of slapstick, like custard pieing someone who's already been bonked in the head by a man turning around with a ladder. Confidence immediately sapped. Jorgensen conceded on all of PSG's shots following that in the game as PSG ran up the score 5-2. Chelsea manager Liam Rossini called it, quote, a crazy finish to the match, where Jorgensen coughed up the ball cheaply again. Thank God this one has actually ruled offside. But he had World Cup winning midfield, his own teammate, Enzo Fernandes, openly screaming in his young goalkeeper publicly in his face, gesturing to the wings as if to say, kick it away.

26:02Don't kick it right back to them. Rosinha says he doesn't want an established number one, calling that thinking, quote, old school. Oh, Liam. I want to broaden this discussion, Ru. I want to talk about all goalkeepers. I spoke to the quite mythical, legendary Hakeem Olajuwon in Houston a couple of weeks ago on World Cup Countdown show. A man who's won two NBA titles, Houston's first ever major trophies, but he grew up as a goalkeeper in Nigeria. He told me his favourite part of the game was blocks. He'd gone on to make an NBA record, 3 ,830 of them. And I asked him, most people want a score to create joy.

26:40you know ultimately blocking stopping preventing it is like reveling in denying mirth so who would even want to be a goalkeeper you know whenever I think about this question I think about the quite brilliant book A Life Too Short about the deeply talented German international goalkeeper Robert Enker who is prodigiously successful ultimately the mental pressures of the game which we do not see, that invisible darkness that can descend. He suffered from depression, ultimately took his own life under the hidden demands and fears we put on top of top-tier athletes. According to a psychotherapist, this gentleman who did suffer from depression and, quote, a deep melancholy, was publicly hung out to dry after failing at Barcelona, particularly after the death of his two-year-old daughter, Laura.

27:32It's a terribly challenging read. I urge you all to read this book. And you'll understand that every pressure, every weakness we laugh at, that we mock, that we deride is amplified a thousandfold for a goalkeeper. They feel everything, every little mistake, punished ruthlessly, blown out of all proportion. Schmeichel talked about this, how a moment like this can define a goalkeeper's career. Well, how does one get back from an event like this? Or will we see these young dents just trickle out a career that ultimately is always in the shadow of these dark moments. Yeah, I think that with Kinski in particular, that was the one thing that you kind of thought when Tudor did take him off the pitch, was you've denied him the chance to atone for it.