Welcome to the Horizon 2.3: Two Humans Walk into a Bar

25:34What in the fuck was Ryan doing with a copy of Under the Tusken Sun? Kind of a delightful movie, actually. Diane Lane, am I right? I don't... Yeah, uh-huh.

25:54So... That gun he was using is nicknamed tough luck. Okay.

26:10Because if you get hit with it. I'm just spitballing here. Tough luck. Yeah. Huh. He shot you with it three times. Yeah, I know. And I really love this shirt, too.

26:35What just happened? Don't worry about it. Let's go. Frank! Let's go. You can fix Georgia Adams' washer-dryer next. Frank, hang on. I need to warn you about Georgia, though. She's a day drinker, but she's really defensive about it. You won't even say anything, and she'll start arguing with you about it. It shoots plasma, Frank. That's superheated matter. It can shoot through a Buick. What do you mean a Buick? Yeah.

27:20Clementine Oh shit Yeah She made you immortal too? Two? What do you mean two? There's this guy, Tarek She met him in medieval Jerusalem And he's like 700 years old now Did she kill him too? Kill him? No

27:55So, I mean, we got into an argument on the street. She didn't like what I was saying, and she... She shut me up. She killed you? Yeah. Yeah, and I don't mean she dropped a piano on me. She... My body was gone. She disintegrated me. Oh, fuck. Yeah, but I mean, she didn't mean to. So she tried to put me back together. Oh, no. Yeah.

28:40So... Put you back together with what? It's a good question. And I quote here, errant particles in the atmosphere. According to that scientist friend of yours. Errant particles in the atmosphere. Yeah. Uh, so, considering the errant particles in the atmosphere up here, uh, rocks, trees, and what, moss? I don't know. Fucking swamp thing! Oh, Jesus Christ, can you, can someone come up with a different analogy? I'm sorry, man, it's sitting right there! Okay, got it. You know who I am? I am a guy who lived on a mountain because it was nice and quiet. And right now, all I would like is to watch a sporting event of some kind.

29:49Okay? That's who I am.

29:55Okay. Okay.

30:04Well, welcome to the Clementine Almost Killed Me Club, man. We should get some jackets made. You too? Oh, yeah. I threw everything I had at her and just made her mad. How'd you survive? Friends. Find the vacation you're looking for in Missouri. Whether you're searching for this, wanting something like this. Oh, that's cute. Maybe up for something like this. Or just really, really need something more like this. You'll find the vacation you want in Missouri. Missouri, it's the getaway that gets... You. Plan your fun at visitmo.com.

30:59Welcome to Radio Rental. The scariest stories you've ever heard in your life. All told by real people. Oh, and off we go. On one side of me, I have these people whispering to each other, staring at me. And then the other side, I have this distaste man, girdling. I was afraid that something was trying to trick me and lure me down there. And I had no idea what I would find if I walked down to that pond.

31:34Zach, there are people outside the room talking. That's not normal. Radio Rental is available now. Listen for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

31:57Hey there. Hello. Hi. Welcome to the Sheep's Eye. Thank you. I'm Deidre. I'm Bob. And this is my wife, Kim. So, I haven't seen you two around before. Oh, well, uh... We live on the other side of town. We've just never been in here before. Uh-huh. Okay. Um, can I get you something to drink? Um, well, do you have a soft drink? Soft drink? Yes, we have this. I'll have an herbal tea. Is that something that you have? Yes. Sure, um, I'll be right back.

32:38What'd they say? They ordered a soft drink and an herbal tea. Uh-oh! Mormons. Oh. No, but aren't we in another galaxy? They go everywhere. They're really giving me a weird vibe, you guys. Yeah, I don't know what's going on. They said they live on the other side of town, and they've just never been in here before. That's bullshit! No kidding! Obviously, they're spies, right? I mean, who's spying on us? Okay, is somebody gonna tell me what the fuck is going on with Steve? What are you talking about? Deidre, we're in the back. Can you and the rest of the Scooby gang come back here, please? Come on.

33:24Hi, team. What the fuck is happening? It's so strange. So they walked into the shop and go, and they were just acting weird. They definitely look weird. They look like humans. But weird humans. They look like stock photos. Oh. They said that they were from here in Hood's pocket. They had just never been in the sheep's eye before. How possible is that? Impossible. Could they be wearing those earth suit things like you wear sometimes? They're definitely wearing earth suits, but why? That's your job, Eldon. Get your little computer feelers in there. There are several privacy blocks on an earth suit.

34:02I need to know the manufacturer. There may be a back door, but there's none on record. Where is life? Maybe they're big fans. You guys remember Apprehensive Craig? Oh, Craig. Who is Apprehensive Craig? Very shy guy, but he went through this phase where he wore Spock ears for what? Two years? Three? And we never said anything. Well, he was obviously going through something. He moved to Olympia. He's a librarian now. Oh. Aw, yeah. Hmm. Good for him. Sounds like someone's living long and prospering. Am I right? No. No. Eldon, listen. I don't think we're taking this as seriously as we should. I think somebody's trying to spy on us.

34:55What the fuck is wrong with Steve? What is everybody talking about? Actually, I've decided I don't care. I need Leif here, Trinket. Well, I really think we should wait. He's doing some very important work with Frank right now. Some important emotional work.

35:16Oh, thank you. And what is this called again? CC Carousel. Okay, see in the middle of the field? There's the cannon. It spins around and fires the ball in a random direction. Everybody scrambles for the ball, and then when your team gets possession, you try and push forward. Okay, can they pass? Only laterally. Great. Oh, hey, simple enough. This is a playoff game, though. There's a timer on the ball, And if you don't get it into the safe zone in 90 seconds, the ball explodes. Explodes? Yeah. How often does that happen? Very rarely. I wouldn't worry about it. Okay. Here we go. Ball is out. Here we go.

36:01Okay. Let's go, guys. Push forward. Come on. Don't go that way. Yeah, don't go that way. Right there. He's open. Pass. Pass, pass, pass, pass, pass. Yeah. There we go. Let's go. Oh, yeah. Wide open. Okay, okay. Some defense? Okay, come on now, defense. Oh, shit, they're right on top of you. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Go, go, go, go, go, go. He's going to make it.

36:31Oh. Ah. That's, ah. It's small on the phone, but was that what it looked like? Yeah. Yeah, that was an explosion.

36:45He... He did not make it. No. Well, that's... It's unfortunate. Yeah. I mean, it really adds to the intensity of the game, though. It's fantastic. Frank. Oh, yes. Eldon, what is it? We're very busy. There's a situation at the sheep's eye that I could use Laith's assistance with. Okay. Well, how important is this situation, Eldon? Don't test me, Swamp Thing. God damn it! Fuck off, Eldon! Listen, I run this town. Do you understand me? We don't like people spying on us, trying to get a look at the secret sauce around here. Are you feeling okay? You don't think we can defend ourselves? You really think we're going to let you make us look ridiculous?

37:38Hey, Steve, whatever you're doing, stop it. Oh, see? Now Frank's here. Now you're in trouble. The fuck is wrong with you, Steve? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do I mean? You sound like Stuart Little. He took scrambled eggs. What? It's a drug. Steve, humans aren't supposed to take that, man. I feel fine. I don't know what you guys are talking about. If everything is so dangerous here, why does it all seem so stupid? It's always both. Okay, Steve, get in the back. Right now. Deidre, I was gone for a few hours, and Steve is taking alien drugs. I am only one woman, Frank. I like the tiny boys.

38:20He's like our little buddy. Can we get him to sing Christmas songs? Okay. Yes. Thanks. Doug, what's going on? Oh, they came into the store, and they were acting weird. They look like humans, but there's something, oh, not right about them. Great. Hi. What's happening? I don't know who our new guests are, but we need some information on the Earth suits they're wearing. Life. Any insight? Uh, have they disabled remote access? No. Okay. They're not pros, then. We need to discern the manufacturer. No, we don't. You need to make an open request to the device, but you need to make a thousand requests in one second.

39:02That's the skeleton key. Is that true? Why is that not documented anywhere? Probably so it doesn't end up on someone's Tangle database. All right, I'll make the request. Device info will be on my screen. All right, I'm in. Let me see.

39:19Son of a bitch. Motherfuckers. Wait, what? What is it? I'll be right back.

39:32Welcome to the sheep's eye. Hello.

39:39Drink up. Uh, we don't actually drink coffee. Yeah, it makes my nerves so shot. What it does to you is send your body into shock and kills you within two minutes. You know, I wonder sometimes, if coffee wasn't poisonous to Ted's, maybe they would lighten up a little bit and stop being the hugest assholes in the triad. I know that you fascists have been trying to get your foot in the door in the Iron Quadrant for who knows how long. And I'm sure you look at this weird Earth town as the opportunity you've been waiting for. It's not. It's not what you think. I'll give you two options right now. You come with me, nice and quiet, into the back room.

40:31Or, drink up. Please. Sit down. Did you hear what I said? Please. Sit down. I can explain. Do you have any idea what would happen to the two of you if I told this entire bar full of rogues and criminals there were a couple of Teds in here? Do you have any idea how many people on this planet have had the pleasure of doing hard time in chemical ice? Please don't do that. We wanted to have a child.

41:06What the fuck are you talking about? We're not spies or something. We... I work in waste recycling. I'm a Skybridge driver. We met on her train. We filed cohabitation requests for a few years. Later, we applied for a procreation license. I didn't have favorable enough genetic profile. Please sit down.

41:36My name is Dargo. I'm Greta. What are you doing here? What's with the Earth suits? We got desperate a while ago. We made a plan. In retrospect, it was a pretty stupid plan. We heard there was someone here on Rax Prime that could remove reproductive blocks. But as soon as we arrived, it became clear that we had been conned. You paid up front to an unknown entity. How the fuck did you people conquer three galaxies? I just said it was a stupid idea. We were just sitting ducks there in the city. We were getting a lot of really scary looks from people. But we didn't know what to do next. We heard about this place, and we still had Earth suits in our cruiser from a trip we took to Earth.

42:22We went to Akron. Have you been? It's really nice. Anyway, we decided to come here and try to blend in until we figured out our next move Uh-huh

42:37Well, I can tell you your next move Your next move is to get the fuck out of here and never come back You don't understand Look, I'm sorry that your dream of having a little Ted baby has been smashed But from my perspective, the last thing the triad needs is more Ted's in the world Get the fuck out of town and never come back. You don't understand. They won't let us live together now. What? A procreation license is hard to get, so there are things they do to scare people off. There are consequences. If a couple with a cohabitation license applies for a procreation license, and they're deemed incompatible genetically...

43:16Then we can't live together. It's not just that. You're sent to a relocation specialist and they deliberately split you up. We'd be on opposite sides of the planet. That sounded like a nightmare. I'm not doing that. I can't do that. I'm not going to suddenly move on with my life knowing she's just sitting there on the other side of the planet. How is some renegade Ted baby going to solve that problem? If you're pregnant without a license, then there's some recourse. It happens sometimes. The procreation blocks fail, so your application gets forced through the system. That was our only chance to stay together.

44:00Everything I learn about your planet makes me hate it more. Try living there. Oh, I'm sorry. Is it rough for you? Is it hard up there at the top of the food chain? Oh, the trials of ruling three galaxies with an iron fist. I'm not ruling anything. We're just people. What? Look, we're not stupid, okay? We know... We know we're the bad guys. Yes. There's trillions of us on TED. You really think every single one of us is evil? Maybe you like thinking of us that way. Maybe it makes us easier to hate?

44:45Leave right now.

44:50Leif. What? I'm pretty sure you know what.

45:07Emlyn. What? Emlyn. They can do what you want. Are you sure? I am. They're no fans of the Ted Empire. They might even do it for free. Thank you. Get the fuck out of here. You're going to get yourselves killed. Thank you so much. Go!

45:43Hey there. Hey. I'm Deidre. Leif. Nice to meet you. You too. Deidre, can I get a double shot of Jack Daniels, please? Mmm, I'm not sure. Can you spell Albuquerque? What? That's how I'm able to tell if someone's too drunk. I ask them if they can spell Albuquerque. I can't spell Albuquerque sober. I know, but the drunk people don't know that. That's not bad. Would you mind if I get drunk first and then I'll not spell it for you later? Sure.

46:29So, is everything okay? Yeah. Who were those guys?

46:41Just people.

47:02Don't be the brooding guy away from the party. You're no longer sexy enough to pull that off. Hey! How was your day? I don't know.

47:21Well, it was bound to happen eventually. What? If you keep running into different versions of yourself, eventually you're going to run into one that made all the wrong choices.

47:40I'm assuming that's what your little fix-it tour of Hood's Pocket was all about Yeah, I guess so I met Deidre She's great She is great It's, um I don't know what to do with it all Yeah Don't ask me Oh, I won't

48:09He's not you, Leif I mean, I have no idea who you are But at least I can tell That you're not the most notorious pirate in the triad I have no idea who I am What do you mean?

48:35Leif, get over here and meet the Truscans. Yeah. Okay. Sorry about the grilled vegetable party. I convinced him to throw a steak on. Oh. You're actually cooking your meat now? You really have changed. Shut the fuck up. Leif, this is Bulb. Bulb, this is Leif. Hey, how you doing there, pal? Hey. I'm Bulb. That's my brother, Nob, and that's my other brother over there, that ugly son of a bitch. That's Joel. Hey, guys. I hear tell you're the type of guy who can settle an argument about fusion core containment linings. Magnetic or inertial? Look at Mr. Fancy Guy over here with the inertial containment.

49:22Inertial is always going to be more efficient. Leif, let me ask you. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? That's the hill I'm dying on. All right. We're going to go round and round with this all night. Let's get some roots in here. Get over here, you little son of a bitch. Okay. Uh, hey, Virge? Frank. I think I'd like a debrief tomorrow on whatever this evil twin brother of Leif business is about. Yeah, of course. Um, but listen, Eldon assures me that he won't be able to find us, okay? Okay? We've covered our tracks. Okay. Okay. Good. Hey, uh... I don't know. I think I'm finally starting to feel something.

50:12Oh. Holy shit. Can someone shut him up? When is this going to wear off? Hopefully never.

50:48I am a roving gambler. I roam from town to town. Whenever I meet with a deck of cards, I lay my money down.

51:01Bring them in.

51:10Jesus Christ! Leave us alone.

51:17I hear they picked you up in orbit around Raxius. I think first we should express some gratitude. Isn't that right, Battle Pope? That would be the mannerful thing to do, Bugaboo. We was almost gone for good there, weren't we, Battle Pope? Only a collection of moments between us and the great beyond, Bugaboo. When do you suppose the shattering of our teeth will come to an end, Battle Pope? I'm sure I don't know, bugaboo. For fuck's sake! You have permafrost, you idiots! That's what happens when you float around in the black for as long as you did. You're going to feel frozen solid for months! Do you know why I'm going to hate that even more than you are?

52:08Because it's going to make this ridiculous southern gothic iambic pentameter of yours even more grating on my nerves! So, if you wouldn't mind, in as few words as possible, how in the hell did you get your asses handed to you on Raxius?

52:32Well, that would require us knowing a thing or two more than we do know. There are certainly some unknown quantities in this particular squared hands. Oh my god! Let me be as clear as I can. Tell me what happened on Raxias, or I put you right back in the black where I found you.

53:02Virg.

53:08What?

53:33Welcome to the Horizon is brought to you in part by our Monte Cristo level and above supporters. Wilson, Billy, Bert Bert, Bethany, Second Bethany, Scotty Most Definitely Not Bethany, Starbucks Union Barista Bethany, and the Red Cup Rebellion, three pandas in a trench coat named Bethany, Super Sly Secret Season Sasquatch subtly seeks crazy cool cryptid club created by bravely battling Bethany's badly beating bongos. Introducing Recy Pontiff as the 19th Doctor and the 164 ,364th Bethany, and Sothily's Bethany Maximus, Lord of Kingwood, Texas. The Bethany War will continue until morale improves.

54:09Muffin Madness Cafe Annabelle gives Bethany muffin. Bethany in a Bethany mask. You call her Bethany, I call her Hedphony. The goblins ride to the aid of the Bethany's. Jason, commander of the Bethany hunters, McDonald. The Bethany's demand more Omega Station. Oddkeep the sentient lighthouse watching for wayward Bethany's. The faceless old Bethany who secretly lives in your home. Balian Fair, the knight of silver flames, battled billions of Bethany's. Bethany the Lone Star Edition. There are only 134 MB fan fiction and one Bethany. Lil' Birch and her Bethany's horsing around. CJ's big barbecue bistro for Bethany's.

54:43Joji the Birdwatcher takes off her Bethany disguise to get down on one knee and ask Ollie Bakesoda, will you marry me? The Bethany of Bethany's. Master Oogway has descended from the spirit realm in order to bring peace to the ongoing Bethany war. Physic the Good Bush, definitely not one of the bad bushes funding rebel Bethany's to overthrow the duly elected Bethany's. My milkshake brings all the Bethany's to the diner. Dr. Mojo postulates the end list endlessly splintering off as a Bethany and Bert Bert's caboose until its end list's all the way down. Dave and Buster's server manager ready to serve all the Bethany's a Monte Cristos.

55:20NB Bethany's cut your car in half with a laser saw. I can't believe it's not Bethany. Chase and her army of turtles join the Bethany war. Dr. Professor Reverend Bethany Wethany Lethany Woofie McFlovenberger, MD, PhD, Esquire, and that's not pretentious at all, is looking for a cure to the Bethany mutation that the Society of Bethany's began the war with so many years ago. Topher the Sporadic Gay Bethany. Sir Dredmor Spiva is wondering if Bethany likes night breakfast. Arnold Rumspringa, the demise of the Temple of Bethany's. Bethany reading in a green field. Bubblebutt Bethany has banana breath.

55:51Bethany 2, electric boogaloo. I pushed her. Bethany, that is. Chad Hatter, space mage, in the war against the Bethanies. Kenran, cosplaying as a Bethany. Lady Bethany, a.k.a. Mrs. Turkey Spit. Wilbur Winklewright, wristwatch wrangler of West Worcestershire, bamboozled by the bajillions of bustling Bethany's Bethanies, belligerently blocking his sight of the devious Red Nell. Red Nell, hiding in a crowd of Bethanies to avoid capture by Wiley Wilbur Winklewright, wristwatch wrangler of West Worcestershire. Bailey's Bethany's Burger. It sounds like Bethany, but the Beth is silent. Billy Rose stole my Bethanies.

56:24The Benny Yapper baked a pie for all the Bethanies. Mr. Squizzle-Sizzle-Wizzle-Fizzle-The-Horrendous-Apologizes-For-Conspiring-In-The-Bethany-War, Invites-For-Tea, are being sent now. Alexandre Larocque has brought Le Guillotine to assist the Bethanys in their survival war. Vive la revolution! The Julius Bohannon Foundation, the Coalition for Patrons Named Bethany, and contributions to your TED station from viewers like you. Biro the Motherfuckin' Dragon is willing to solve the Bethany War with Yahtzee. Cernoculus the Space Knight who protects all the Bethanys. Cowboy and Sasquatch hunt Bethanys.

56:54James Harlow saw the claw and named it Bethany. Sonic Boy 99 would like a Bethany butt sandwich, but will settle for a fish in a bag. Kay the Flying Penguin says honk honk to all the Bethany's out there. Wandering Bethany Biscuit. Glorbnar 7, now granting refugee status to victims fleeing the Bethany Wars. Bethany in a Random Place. Jalen Linares, secretly an NB Bethany. The Kells fights with the Bethany's. In the mysterious AZHQ, I'll grant you that we have a multiplicity of mics, a jumble of James's, a trifecta of Tony's, one of whom still wants to be Leif, but sadly, no Bethany's. Eris, goddess of Bethany's.

57:27But Bethany, I made biscuits. Green Mountain Hermit, deaf, allergic to Bethany stew. Lost to Basan Prison, is now an all-inclusive resort for the Bethany's and their family and friends. Bethany-poppity-boom. I'm Eva's evil twin sister, Bethany. The real fairy godmother says, if you Bethany's don't knock it off, I'll turn this audio drama around, so help me. Alphonse Suitperson, knight of the order of Bethany's. Still Casper's number one fan, but now armed with a quantum spatula and ready to

58:17I hope something good happens to you today. Yes, you. Lizard Lee. Rosemary Prim Anthony Lakey Thomas Adams Brett Zimmerman Lauren Benner Dan Gentry Ron Hayden Stephanie Boock Andrea Crowther Luca Vecito Boot Scootin Dave Naya Venturi Ryan Abbey Michelle Hopper Jessica Ingela Kevin Daughtry Meredith Jester Martin Deers Entropy Eigenbasis Robert Savat Matt B Richard Ryan Moschel Dee Flower Kelatee Arena Fall of the Berlin Wallaby Lauren Mayer Jake the Cook Some Days You're the Beetle Some Days You're the Dung Josie Jones V Greenlee Elijah Sharp, Paul P, Neckbone His Imperial Dudeness, Oh Hey, It's Jay, Lou the Ghost, Cinder and Beast of the Maze are in the Deep Freeze, Grimm, off the internet, wants Harriet to know that he loves her, Ernie Brooks, Titan King 707, Rich Francis, Ducky the Therapy Dog, Burger Kaspaspa, no relation, Jedi Shaolin, Smart Alec the Great, Botumbutom, Gas Station Encrypted, Lord Kennedy, Shane Snoke, Bird Bird the Bird's Bird, Cheesy McFish, Papa Goose, Midnight Plumber 2, Electric Boogaloo, A Very Spicy Walrus, Amanda Bills, Diana Nevels, Dax Myers, Flacco aka Johnny R the Disco Spider, It's Batty, Not Crazy, Leaf's Sixth Project, Vicky Hebert, Zen Satsu, and Rohan Will Answer, Murdoch Wang, Caterpillar Farmer, Catherine didn't sarcastically call Fiona a Doctor Who at least once.

59:44Did we really think it would work out? Chimera, Crookham, Donald Moat, Daniela Yacom, the space trucker Chadwick Conan Doyle III, and the Ballsack Fleet is at your service. Jody Green, Michael Peters, Political Knitter, Lily, Physicist, Brendan Shoneman, Bob Lobster, I divided by zero and now I'm undefined. Peter the Horse is here, Mag Tremor, Rod Stewart the Sailor Slayer, James Weebatt the Listless Enjoyer, Emily Catterton, Laika the space dog who should be saved by Gloria. Miss Maxine. Vodka in my blood, bears in my hair, sadness in my heart, party everywhere. Trust monkeys, not rattlesnakes.

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1:01:05I'm a Kung Fu Panda on the Wind. CB Radio. The intergalactic house of cats demand a free Palestine. Electromancer. Chekhov's Space Cannon. Corey Sensus. Surf and Turf Telecoms. I'm a Gin. Red and Dusty with his Garden Goddess. Kobe's Dingleberry. Mystic Monster for Chaos. Ziggy Dreadful. Johnny Texas. G-Wing. Frank One. Figgy Aloysius and the Ooni Moonies featuring Milo Kappa Kaiju. I'm just here to refill the Parmesan cheese. It is Sparks. Damn Scrub. Paratalk the Furbolg. Lost Girl Lou. Christopher Byram, Middle American Penguin, Shauna Welch, Crocheted Cosmos, Jared Patton, Andy the Celestial Penguin, Messino's Lips, Leif's Bathrobe, Misty Lovebug, Bo Nunley, Ariana Castillo, Lisa McElhaney, The Rat Sorcerer, Lita Medinger, Marco, Lethargic God, Friend, as in your best, Lime Ghost, M, Jared Armstrong, Jay the Irascible, The Great and Powerful Spatilda, The Magic Committee, Ian Full, a river otter and their gender-neutral partner.

1:02:07One intergalactic year with BigPotato99, aka The Rat Lady, aka Bumblebee, aka AK-47. Kai, just a little guy. Dale Van Hoos, Ender Wright, Mark Nazawaritz, Exgenia the Capturer of Light, Mucklewang, Duncan Albert, Theoretical Chemist, Xavier Dasher, Chris Loves to Read, Katie Michalik, Greg Andrews Lyons, Just Matt 85, Patrick G, That Girl Gracie, Magnus Von Kaffenheim, Ballbags the Pirate Plunderer of Necropants Gold, Longtime Lurker, Scooter, The Unlucky Son, Jennifer Myers, A Chef Named JJ Wants to Apply to be Gloria's New Line Cook, Lady Lazarus, Anazi, Lord of Stories, Tom, Donnie Darko, aka Darko the Destroyer, Tom Shin, Caitlin and CT's NeverEnding Podcast Adventures, Whisperdan, Alexis Walker Kyo the Panda Puppy Forklift Operator Ruby Cherries Nick Faye Julie and her manservant Olen Justin and Amy Triplett Jin Sims Pen Pen Ring to the Motas The Leathermans Lukewarm Fart Odd Commodity Jen Before Ender Ho Earth Witch Leah Prime Gregory Santoro Mothball Not the Fucky Fried Chicken Robert Drapiza Iono Caitlin Hoagland Jonathan Tolbert Mr.

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1:04:24Kay Kayow, Empress Squishy Face of Greater Catopia. Anna Garcia, Goblin King, Rays of Noop, Ruby Booth, Bubber Duckle, Yegor Luce, Terry Cadds, Leaf Tracks, The Rise of Leaf, Chapter One, Loaf Tracks Retires. Tarian Roundtree, Catalyst for Chaos, Sculliver, Cat Lucido, Sam and Shane, Ahsoka Likes Hugs, Caitlin Hess, V, Ma Dukes, U.S. Marshal Stacy, ooh, chickadee, Terran of the Guild of Free Cartographers, Sweet Chaos 7, Dango Dale, Esty, not the website. At every moment at every corner of every possible world, there is always a way home, and it's already found you. Jao Paulo Lemos, DeShane, Tanya Fisher, Appalachian Death Queen, Anya Teapelt, Zosifer, Doggo of Doom.

1:05:08It's official, they're called TheGronies. Kevin Winans, Marlon C. You could stop at five or six stores, or just one. Madame Barry, Cherish Hellfire, Mistress of Time and Space, Lichen Lady, Midnight Club, Cameron Agnese West, Knox, Lisa Liu, Emmett Hale, The Triad's Baddest Goblin, Emory and Lano, James Miles, Browncoats Love the Diner, House Chaos and the Critter Cacophony, Max and Nia and Ivonne's six, seven, nope, it's Mark, Minion Simone Mimi Davis, Mr. and Mrs. Ronald and Misty Don Mitchell Jr., Gaia Turtle, Wayne Barahona, Jesse the Dragon Rider, We will not rest until Puerto Rico and Palestine are free.

1:05:47Pluto Crow. Nissy's Mom. PokeSplort. Whiskey Rebellion and Gen Riot's Interdimensional Detective Agency. Zephyr Vitriol. Altreon. Slim Nandy. Goth Leif. William Lemoyne. Jen and Brit. Adriana Bartolomucci. Jonah is Gay. The Midnight Ashes. Hornetti. Hood's Pocket Protector. Unpaid intern that can barely afford the$10 a month but fuck it you guys earned it. Valkyrie Storm. Patricia who's always late but somehow on time. DC Squirrel, Ryan, Kyle the Interstellar Highwayman, Shelly Act on the Verge, Gale Friend, Uncle Denzo and Aunt Buffy had the opportunity to try Miss Chris's sandwiches and can attest that they are fire.

1:06:25Rubber Cake, Clover the Clown, The Sparky Tech, Prop the Crocogator, Dakota L, Jazz Punker, Captain Tight Pants and the Companion, Kentucky Cried Frickin, Renee N, Catarina De La Playa, RIP Eloise Waffles, Aki the Space Druid, Phantomland TTRPG Dice, K8 the Curiouser, Moxie, A Blacksmith, Ash Montgomery, Jason HVAC Tech for the Diner's Deep Freeze, Aaron James Tyrone Barlow the First of His Name, SK Phoenix, Glitch the Gamer Error, Zephyr the Weffer Foxworth, Ted Ted and Teddy, Merryface, Luan Cherry, Peppermint Pearl, the Interdimensional Space and Tea Time Witch, Nicole Six Four, Amara Salazar, Banjo Buscalo, Full Beans, Gloria's Forgotten Ford Festiva, Brandon Wright, Night Breakfast at the Midnight Cauldron, Force for Good-ish, Mark Scott, Rosie Mum, The Judah, Slater Morales, Intergalactic Fry Lord, Gravity's optional, but fries aren't.

1:07:21Angel Vasquez, Tara, Stephen Raymer, J. Carp Fishman, The Great Goblino, Low Oxygen, Save the Mungos, Nye, Lilac Marcella, Rachel Krempa, with special thanks to my best friend Lizzie and my husband Steve. Don't worry about the order, honey. Your Majesty, Temporal Hashbrown, Diane Brown, Dr. Flog, Captain No Sleep, The Slim Reaper, Reuben Eden, Smedley P. Snodgrass III, but please. One Mississippi, Two Mississippi, Three Mississippi, Call Me Smeddy, The Shreveport Bohannans, CC the Umbrella Mage, Bradbury's Sasquatch Loads Chekhov's Gun, Din, Cosmic Ketchup, Lack of Lifestyle, August the Schmogest, and Hossfest, Ashley Davis, Mousy, Hood's Pocket Gear and Sprocket Local Repair Cafe, Postmaster General Kwan Sent Me, Mad Maddox, Blake Basmagian, Nitwit 14, Roiled way too harshly, DJ Johnny B, Finley's Evil Clone Who Designs Dresses for Dogs, Marco Montano, Trey B, Trey B, Shiny Fields, Adam Tachek, Christopher Wendell, Unproductive Banana, Pulsifer the Paulist of Paulism, Zombie Spider-Man, Brain Demons is an Anagram of Brandon is Me, Bex823, Auntie Cryptid, Barry Heap, Gas Mask Penguin, In the Hot Seat, Mime Ninja's Ninja Mime, Barry, Dilly is Dallying, Podcast Junkie Wants Gloria's Tamale Recipe, Futile Screaming at the Ocean, Fox Hatlin, Dylan Caroni, Pedro Vibresto, Penny Sparkles, Slider, Dimitri, Julian Rhodes, Maple Emily, the gayest library janitor in Indiana, Jennifer Rae Page, Scout Mistress and Her Phalanx of Intergalactic Eagle Scouts, TED Talks says to the unpaid feds, stay strong, Vapis 10's Big Black Gay Pig Hole, Gubrius, you know, like Lugubrius but without the loo, Bruce, Jessica Gagoma, Cabernet Corsair.

1:09:08Torical. Jenny the Bear. Grr. Bellringer. Sir Dean Thorne. Treech? Josie Jones. Mr. Fibble is very cross. Haute Potato. Blind Time Traveler Convention Date. LA Woman the Phoenix Rising. New Name. God? No, not him. Jeff Andrew? Sure. Jeff Andrew. Miss Luann. A British woman with cute dogs. Cup of Noodles. Schmizzy Two Shoes. Luna Nova. Nicholas Griffith. Matt Grigsby. Justin Smolin, Riku31, Craig Dundee, TheName's Night, With a K, Astral C, IckleMePickleMeTickleMe2, GuyWithTheChops, Sam, Mitchell Yee, BagelKnife, Inmelda and Scott, Courtney Cochran, Lily Starling, Ryan K, Nate, Forklift, LiftsForksForCliff, Vince M, BrickBrick, Chip, RadioFreeRelia, ViolinLovesMitty, Brian Pasley, Subawassa, Grenna, PistonWhip, CaptainDucky, BlitzBell, RetroDagwood.

1:10:02Our overhead is way too high with all these names, and please make sure to turn in all your receipts. Love Josh from accounting. Satsuma, Silliest Goose, Dr. Jones, Coach Shane of Toad Suck Central, Go Cranes, Cole Arthur, Lego Croissant, Cassade, Norwin Murgler. The star set messengers want to know if you've written that four page essay on why you don't think about bugs. Joe Cuppa, We've been chopping broccoli. Icy Fish, The Hacker Known as Ivy DeBurb, Edwin McDonald, a feisty-ass chickadee, Poultry Landmine, The Scrappy Poet, Jenny the Cryptid Paladin, Maverick Artist, Shit, It Was a Mimic, Basil in Their Tea, Waiting to Gossip with David, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Ainsley, Kiwi Lovelybead, Zoe, Michelle Spurgeon, Jack the Sleepy, Garrett Henderson Twote, Still Trapped, But I've Stopped Asking Why, The Freezer Is, I Am, We Chill, Son of Defarge, Wisco Teach, Scott A.

1:10:59Snellgrove, Give Peas a Chance, Casper's Cult, Samalama Ding Dong, Sarah, That's It, Just Sarah, Ricardo Galamba, Kari's Crafty Cloaking Devices LLC, Hashtag We Weave 'em of Gossamer, Deeringer, Penny the Wonder Dog and Bucky Von Buck Buck, Kentex Oridian, Cherry Applebee, Medium Rare Extra Toasted Bun, Saucy Caesar, Belt, Aspen is a Verge fanboy, MickJ67, Ava's favorite My Little Pony pencil says get your mammogram? Is This Thing Recording? Mr. and Mrs. Drifter, representative of the Alaska Midnight Burger Tummy Time chapter. Nathaniel Lee Industries, Lord Entropy, Bok Bok Motherfucker, The Fae Wanderer, Everybody's Favorite Clown Splotchy, Pinstrike Algorithm, Kosher Steak, Gabrielle Strife, Alyssa's Shiny Pants, Gondor Calls for Aid, Muscles for Tits, Alan Berglund says, Hi Mom!

1:11:50Katie McSkull, Raven Stromdans, hapless novelist passenger of the dimensionally impermanent and temporally incontinent bookshop cafe, The Wild-Eyed Prophet, Tessa Craig, Perfectly Personalized Disaster, Richard Schofeld, Jim Turner, Lux Lubinus, Javi De Niro, Big Junk, Gadeeds, Bingo Sticky Rice, Boom Boom's Wooden Leg, Will the Real Muad'Dib, Please Stand Up, Kitty Cat and Lollipop, Can't Get Enough of This, Jillian C, Udon96, Benjamin, Not Franklin, Tracy Baby, Leia, Is That the Chris Hancock Who Traded Weekly Soup for the use of my kitchen table? A Singular Nightbird. I am the lizard frantically firing flechette guns.

1:12:31Bumble Fae. Mr. Epsilon. The Mothman. Long-Haired Matt. DJ. Lenny Harris. Robert W. Briel Zebub. Krasimira. Jessa Lorin. Mayday Hoops. The Bean Wizard. Myth and Stitch Embroidery Loves the Mucklewaynes. Lulu Louise. Dulio. The Brew Crew Family. Bert Ruba. Your most benevolent lord and master of the multiverse. Jeffrey George. Exquisite Whimsy. Ellie, don't tariff me, bro. Oopsie! Evelyn, the wizard mooses hold out their cat for you to pet. Grimlore, Existential Pancakes. Jenny Waboom, Errant Popsicle Stick. M. Horowitz, Isle of Refuge. Cappy, Jack Spider's Mom. Llama Fresh, Jare the Benevolent Destroyer.

1:13:12Valtiel Heller, Revan the Red Beard Wizard. Bert Bert and the Funky Bunch. Corora the Twelfth. Shh, just listen. Damien Flutterjohn, Zomcon. Welcome to the Quan Pound. Pen, pen, pen, pen, pen. Mr. Muchacho Kaiserschnitzel is bringing an anchovy pizza to Lars on Omega Station. The wolves in the deep freeze say, aww! Julie Hammond, Sanctuary Moon's number two fans. Simpson, Jason, Alice Lewis, Simply Amy Sue, Even Older Liz, McBearcat, Grack Pinfeather, Sitican Druidic Scientist, Astro, Your Friendly Neighborhood Android, Moonlight Zombie Fox, Old Doc Racey, The Midnight Missionary, Out There Somewhere Looking For You, Rotten Ronnie sleeps in grandma panties.

1:13:55J.S. Eldritch Ender. Skull-Wonky. Artist Dragonborn. Bigby Garage. Bill Zangana Lester. Joaquin Jimenez. Hello, Big List. I'm Dad. Now let Joe get some rest. It's time for bed. Muffins. Space Wives. Captain Jack Harkness wants Peter the Robot. Oreo? Oreo. No, wait. Pineapple. Actually, never mind. Oreo. Tell your cat, I said. Banana Manaz. A Corgi-Culled Kibble. Cuddly Kraken, Life's a Load Studio, and his wife, Meganator. The Game, Axel Light, Sarge the Bard, Semenity, Rielfan, LL Cool Mint Jams, Travis Roberticus, The Other Original Caitlin, Ken Daddy, Celestiani, Hazel the Jaded Umbra pulls out a marker and approaches Sign My Shovel to Sign Sign My Shovel Shovel, Leah Izadi, Millie Was Taken, Hannes, Ben Camp, Shanman Man Man, Karma Karma Chameleon, Wabajack, Zoe and Her Army of Mice, Briar Longlost, Daniel, Sammy the Baby Seal, I have always relied on the kindness of diners.

1:14:57Dr. Bootyologist the Glutes Doctor, the Hood's Pocket Pants Darts League reminds all players that clean underwear is required. Tobias Ewing, thank you for passing too. Your Anglophone Emotional Support Canadian request will be processed in the order in which it was received. Queen Surly Jess, RIP Lance McClain, you would have loved Midnight Burger. Adam Toklove, Dr. Bitchcraft, Sassy Cat the Space Vixen, Claire Rock, Jekka, Eros de God, The Size 2 Fish You've Been Looking For, E-Yokai, Borgia, Natasha Without Boris, Spiders Are Cuddly, Lafayette Lasagna Lovers 1, The Main Immortal Thinks It Should Be Kendadios, Cheel Neal, Sin City Scuba Steve, Poliwog, Jinx the Cat Would Like To Offer You Biscuits, Michaela White, Elena Pickle, Professor Thaddeus Snookums VIII.

1:15:44Mr. Grin. Glenn Petrovsky. This moment of silence so Joe can catch his breath is brought to you by Rick Tyler, parentheses, audible breath. Elizabeth Hammond. CheapCon. Yeah, you heard me. The real CheapCon, except no imitations. Funch Brunglin. Steam Vision. Conductor of the interdimensional time-spanning hype train. Dave Harreld. Wise Cube. Dirty Diaper Fussbutt and the Piggy Runt. Bro Mine. Pronounce bro. Mine. Main humdinga. Mother of Pearl. Fiona now owns Leif's 18-inch Peter, Seal Face, Rigor Mortis, Megan's Things, Things Megan Makes, Shiny Fields, Magical Maggie, Trebek's Reject, Prophet of the God of the Mucklewains, Matthew with two Ts, the first T is silent.

1:16:26Leif loves laser guns left lying lackadaisically by Labuza, Igneous Burp, Darth Ox. This brief pause is brought to you by Michelle K's wish for Joe to Catch's Breath, Aaron Arnold, Mama Mander, B-Roz, and Sluntmaster J, Alpaca Lips, God, is that you? No, it's Butters, Elliot Paints, Undead Akira, The Lord Reverend, Porgatos Pex, Unselling Wizard, Ryan, Thomas's ten tenebrous tanstaffled tippers treading treacherously tantamount to telling totalitarian trope termination tales, The Lovely Lara Lovely, Kith Gamgee, Sam Wise's flaming cousin, Dariel, Gochi, Hare Hawks, Jacob Mitchell, Swooning for Verge.

1:17:06Zeke in the Box. Stevie Crowhill. How to get Jack from John. Flesh Witch riding a flesh mech through the multiverse. Scrubs. Just some guy from Adelaide named Ryan. Remy. The Panda Crew. Melody Prime. Beardo the Wizard. Captain Benjamin Hawkeye Pierce, the German short hair pointer from Nashville, wants to tell his mom Maddie that he says wolf. Whiskered. Marissa the Ghost. Local snowplows in your area are dying to meet you. Rutherford B. Chesterfield and his dapper companion Winchester. Cheshire Corgi. Stray Cat. Ol' Kelsey No Shoes. Zoldia. Dizzy Flame. Milch Milch Lemonade. Um de Aica Chocolade.

1:17:44Sasha. Bethan Allen Van Gillis. Langston North. Sly Fox, aka Br 'er Rabbit. Pants Darts Champion. The Constantly Lost Geographer. Timothy Aiotis. Chance wants you to know, he cares. Wolf Stark. Adrian Vance. Elliot. Hobbs Decoe. Natalie Bartlett. Rory of Yin. Mubi the Golden Calf, Giovanni Salinas, Rocky G, Perry the Pirate, Aaron Elizabeth, K Narcotics, Solomon Price, A Daydream You Won't Escape, Angela Sanchez, Ava M, Bubba 485, aka Schemmelbach the Christmas Whale, Kaiju Sommelier, Stella Corvus, Jesus Garcia, JP the IT Guy, Candyman Fight, Sandwich, John Peters, you know, the farmer, Barkley on the Holodeck, Dapper Dad, SCP-049, O Magus, Raven the Dreamer, TK, Turtle King, Mike M, Space Based Lasers, Captain B and Lady G with their swabs, Marla Madam, Lotus, still especially loves Fenley, Mr.

1:18:40Steamwave, my friend the rhino says be nice, oop, challenge. Dream Founder, I'm your Huckleberry, Elizabeth T, Ty Ty the Wonder Hamster and her dear darling Duke, Gus, Bombastical Kim Licker, Coco Yumi is Painting Ponies, Hug-a-Muffin, Bigfoot of Doom, D.L., Annie Atkins, Crandyman the Pug Whisperer, Garo, Our Cat Said to Tell You, Meow, Benjamin Ortiz, Happy Early Birthday Alyssa, Pop Rock Quicksand, Abanasso, Adalor, Trans Space Dinosaur, Spooky Spader Storytime, William Kent, Andy, The McJimmy's From Your Local Dimension, Xavier Killingsworth, Reformed Colonel Reb, Mimetic Hygienist, Rogue Art, Aaron Star Joshua Damien and Sentinel of the Star System, Claude DeClauz, Spunky Dan, Rachel Seymour, Chiss Alfridge the Bullheaded Professor, Ed Boy, Ryan Finnelli, Jonathan Kay, Pearl Null, Another Monster, Petabyte Avatar, Tugwin the Mighty, Project Octopus, Ken, Chibs1012, Scotty Oates, Byrotron95, Dan's Granted Clemency by his Overlord Parents, Dance Break!

1:20:09We'll be right back. To leave it alone if you want to live. Must be a witch. Cat with a K. My Thigroni has a first name. Stombenstein El Mustachio. Lukifer Hezekiel. La Chihuahua Brava. Adeline Peets. CC Carousel. Korth the Destroyer. Honest Puck. Casper's Mom's a milf. Scout and Foxglove says the floor is lava. Kordomsky. Craig Armstrong. Plastic Fork. Dulcet Deleche. Get out of my booth. Bug. Propagator? I hardly know her. Sad Angry Crab Man. Chuck McFinley. Effie and Zebulon's trans great-granddaughter, Hazel Hayes. Velocity Girl 42. Little Dragon and a Cauldron of Bats. Ben Carlyle. Flat Steve's Love for Grand Theft.

1:20:54Anna Kearney. Crashly Strange Lilia. The Four Schnauzers of the Apocalypse. Septi and Asha, not Sasha, have the hots for the Mucklewains and would gladly be their unicorns. Starblaze Burnbright. Imzuki Yoki. Spotted Rhino and her Hand-Me-Down Frogs. Red Mafia Panda. Lonely Isle. Kaidalo Headphones. Hinkle. Pikeman Stover. Fondella Stover. Pikeman Stover's wife. Skrizzles. Thwap. Giddy, giddy, giddy. The Firekeeper. The End Is Die. Jeremiah the Cancelled. Librarian Alex. Spike and Faye. Johnny Allen West and the Boys from the Dwarf. Speedy McSpeedy. Wolf. Brandi Gunter. Auntie Becky is owned by five rescue cats.

1:21:32Fermi's Paradoxons. Speckled Unicorn. Jedi Rides Again with Nova the Space Pirate. Tevin Longblades Shortsword. Forget Normal. Oh, damn. CJ Johnson. A Dragon Sitting on Its Horde of Dice, Wendell Whitaker, Fikachu, Smivey, Glowbed Roulette, Andrew Fuller, Dayne and Deb, Ban Mi Hong, The Soup Witch, Bender FTW, Fetishini Alfredo, Amalgamous Pax, Pebbles, Vivi, Effie Rowlings, Megan Hazen, Philip Your Dad Is Not Your Dad, Nick Borough, Midnight Plumber, His Royal Highness Mr. Hamilton Underfoot Kitty I and Accomplice, Princess Penelope the Marchioness of Mischief and Maven of Mystery, Megan Gentry, Mr.

1:22:11Cherry, Our Ass is in the Jackpot, Tubby Teddy, Wayne Heiser, India Inkblot, Slave of Bahamut, Omi Gracie, Dalton Jenkins, Kat Holtz, The True Mega Mike, Fred and George, The What Weekly Media Database, Ava Maddox Jr., Liza Wirth, Cass Williams, Christy, Yeet My Boy, 46 Tool Shed 2, and El Marie Catastrophe, The Image Collector, Blended Music, Definitely Not Kevin, Sitting Squirrel, Patricia E. Melt Missed Everyone, A Round of Yargs on the House, Red the Gray, The Silver Crow, Couch Potato Alex, Neverchild, Dr. Nossos, Interdimensional Biologist, Kiboko Dunord, Lil Kev, Kozamine, Theodrax, Joey B, Lucas Barding, Little Debbie Cupcake.

1:22:54Taryn says, hey, Oreos are rabbit. Sandalwood Mountain is an odd way to refer to Hawaii, but it worked for Henry. Whimsical Fuckery, Megan with an H. Hey, it's Warranty Lady. Look, I've been thinking, maybe it'd be best if we, you know, saw other people for a bit. I need more. Patricia the Time Lord. Is it though? Mango Connoisseur. Britty Bug and The Quirky Jester. The Big Moose is Loose, Aboot the Hoose. That old glory coal. Janelle Miao-Nay's Cat Butler. O'Sheen Liu. Alex Berry. Andrew Oakden. Asymmetrical Exile. Churro Cat the Sun God. Eliza Travels the Universe. Alex Spence. Dr. D. Birdclospe Weather and Mrs.

1:23:30Dubapduwe Birdclospe weather want to say hello to the whole weather family. Galaxy Britches, Angry Ron, Dominus Caesar, Durka Dub, Gloria's ex-girlfriend, Kelly Clickspring, The Wild Thistle, Most Likely Cass, The Sweet Planetary Aroma of Fiona's Grilled Cheese Sandwiches, Jasmine James, Dr. Caber Ant, also known as Omni, thanks Waffle Chateau, Colorado Beekeeper, Fruitcake, Anatha, Zandria, Jennifer Calkins, Guacamoleo, Midday Burger, Don Parks, Throat goatgoat666, oh my god, my dad found out about my Patreon name. Princess Leia, Prime Freak, Protector of the Scottish Realm, Little Lord Stevie Pie, Droid Pirate Finley and his Rubenesque Parrot, Droid Pirate Finley and his Rubenesque Parrot, Stuck in a Pit of Skittles, Sea Squatch, Deflater Mouse, Tony Piekarski, Adrian R., The Devil from Table 12, Javier, Kimberderp, Crazy Thadley.

1:24:24The Harbinger Pulsar. Cremulous is just happy to be here. The Twisted Twigster. The Rural Juror is a massive fan. Faye Queen. Oop Schnart the Probability Demolition Expert. Showtime. CR Iptid. For My Mother. Homer, are we doing crimes? CCTX Girl 6823 Waiting on the Diner. Nicole Studioso. That copy of Under the Tuscan Sun actually belonged to Sign My Shovel. Truck Stop Sandwich, Indigo Escargot, Love My Captain, Joe Mauma, Castriff, Aims Affection for Internet Protection, Retro MG, Night Script, The Gainesville Fear Garden, Before That Wolf Eats My Grandma, Give That Wolf a Lana Banana, Uhtred and Rose's Viking Void Vitals, Fueling the Intergalactic Fight Against Fascism, Not Sure What I'm Doing, Leah Rose, River Brown, Senior Deuce, Scullacy, Warped Writer, Tim Nacy, Ruben Clamso, Turwin, Hugh the Mini Mungo, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Friendly Neighborhood Fire Protection Engineer Skull Bulb Dustin Watson Betty White 813 Randy Supreme and Queen Lancaster The One True Cheap Con Starscribe Lucian Thunderstruck Oh my mama Dooser now identifies as Roman Durge The Other Adele Chef Gal Val Leah Hall Sarah May Cone of Silence Consultants LLC Needs Fresh Towels in Room 3 at the Horizon Silly Willy Bubble Butt Sierra Not from Arkansas Zico, Ebenezer Boob, Caleb Tumiala, Jason Woods, Arnie Arbuckle Esquire, Digital Floof Lost in Time, Potion Maestro, Nebula Nell, Regulators, Mount Up, Kringle Over Coffee, Mad Yogi Eileen, A Cat Named M, Potito Pato, Palace, Big Mo, Demonic Narwhal 8, I Am Annie, I Live Forever and Every Moment I've Existed, I Swear to Every Star in the Cosmos, I Never Forgot It Was a Gift, The Stone Fox, Trisha Schaefer, Solivia, Jusatin, Papitos, Splathower, Jennifer Baumer, Ninja Grim Reaper, Miles Nelson, I am a bomb till I think of something better to do.

1:26:24A-brrr-it-words.

1:26:54Eagle Rock Lobster, The Gabbiest Painter and Her Bird of Fire, Wandering Wenjo, Painted Oni, Q-Del, Pharrell, Emily with Two E's, Spaceman Nathan, Ramsey's Niblick III, Kerplunk Kerplunk, Oops, Where's My Thribble, Mad Goat, Jackie Wavelet, Yayoi Gigerin, Issa the Strega, Dee Greitzler, A Gremlin with the Munchies, Michelle Scaracchio, Genuine Jacob, Andy's Brain is Weird, Space Rooster Randy, Leopard Donut, Poofy Thang, Mellow Nuggets, Keychain Crap, Matt Matt Sharkman, Steelo, Arcadia, Bumbling Lilybee, A Quick Pause So Joe Can Sip From His Tiny Tea Cup. It's like 10 p.m. after I get tea. I'll never get to sleep.

1:27:31You know what I'm saying? That's just gonna have to be whatever beverage I've got next to me right now. Can't be tea every single time, is what I'm saying. Bufordi's Nuts, Panda, Curtis Lelig, Kennedy Allison Farner, Tristan Stolz, Dalen Y, Shadow Rapture, Yet Another Nicole, Hank the Wonder Llama, Arcraft, Russell, Zephyrus Wind, The Ornamental Hermit, Just a Regular Fox, Jeremy Impson, What the hell? Cineplex and all the black people in North Carolina. Just Rachel. Waffles, waffles, waffles. Danger Girl. Atlas Bear. Patty the Ginger. Ava's Cigarette Ash. Hugh Biffed It. Ay Zeus. Anaphylaxis.

1:28:04Scav with Comtax. The shape-shifting sad girl and her girlfriend say, Joe, you've done it again. Bibi Baba. Sarah Nicole. Angry Leafs Lasersaw. Magnus Aerochill. Amy Perry. Christopher Kai. Source Decay. The Space Cowbie. Skeksis. Randy's Amigo. Grimlock. Katie Mermaid and the delinquent duo. Nauman. Nicole. Victor Schauberger reincarnated as White Mountain Hillbilly Glitter Cupcake. Max Dangers. Security Chief Schatzi. The Anxious Peach. Team Michelle and Billy. Naya Nixrino. Frankenator. Nordlebash. Jordan. Arwen X Belasco. Ryan Rosensky. Average height, medium, rage. Audio Monkey. Joe. Team Hefeweizen.

1:28:42Monica and Mason Kay. Rowan. Lady of the Black and Herald of the Stars. REN. Can't Manage Normal. Ryan Burnett. The Joyful Nihilist. Dr. Dr. B, Zo Prez and the Bumble Army, Growing into My Farm Boots, Super Beth Becomes an RN, Alongside My Bootstop Friend, Geneva Boss, Brothers of the Cosine, Uncivil Gnomes, The Rat Queen Evelyn, Great Lunch Conversation, The Other Scott, Letty Lou, He was a shifty one, that Nick Howard. Kinger Was Here, Bobby Ray Winland Jr., Bebop Be Dabba Doo Wop, Warped Echoes, Slabs McTerps, Mama's Time Lord, Jeremiah Franco, Justin, The Nick of Time, Gothic Rainbow, So We Made It, Cody McClure, McHadley, Eternal Companion, Maxine Lizotte, Jingoloss, Hazmatilda, Ditsy Bay, Just Your Average Reese, Kyle Church, I Am A Leif On The Wind, Static Ego, Some Fucking Swamp Wizard, Lolly, Evan M.

1:29:31Dobson, Dave B., Nobby, Your Friendly Neighborhood Pathologist, Going To Be Lit, I Am Shaggy, Captain Emerald L., Wayne Hall, Danny Mars, Eternally Screaming, Scebo and Fuzzle McBumperditz, Neelix Tiny Wolf, Asher the Raven, Christina Senate is teleporting. BRB. Where the Shane's at? Definitely not an android. Seriously, I'm not. The Wandering Welshman, Whatever Tabby, Carolyn Harper, Nikolai Tolkachev, Capo the Sartorius, Z3DT, Shy Sparrows, BLTN, The Kiwi Duckling, Dana Dana Bobaina, Fifi Fofaina, Dad and Aubrey, The Dirt Bike Demons, Tequila Mockingbird, Snuffleupagoose, Dameron the Space Goblin, I So Pale, Oh No, A Bee!

1:30:11I Am Lord Zoltan, Hear Me Roar, Pocket Ghost Max, Mags the Conqueror, Wes and Heather wonder if Derek Adair will join. My cat's name is... A-Beef. Eric. Katie Kate. Get your colonoscopy. Victor Casados. Emily Schmemely. Work for Melvis. Boho go bye bye for Jojo Pogo. That's a no-go, bro. Cody Monster. Collided Mind. Miss Nixie. Baby Baitin' Lee. Charlie Rudel. Kyle Perino. AK. Sid the Sloth on a Bike. Priya Gandhi. The Wandering Mermaid would like you to know that the little mermaid and the creature from the Black Lagoon are the same exact story. Lil Stevie Pie. Two Polar Cat. Carl, the teller of dad jokes.

1:30:47Skylab's multi-dimensional, multi-phasic, intergalactic quantum cyberverse. Verde Soul. Galen Miller. Tess. Geriatric Youngun. Mystic Hippie. Unforkable. Daniel Nitz. Mavis Bacons. Pyro's Calling. Joe Suasion. The Wizard's supercalifragilistic expialidocious. Too many gens. Cat Jot. Pamela Roselle Tierra. Then Steena Says. Thud Tweed. Enigmatic Catbird. Countess of Carbon. Slippy the Squirrel. Luminous Elk. Rhodian Caution. Love is for the nerds. Taz Hernandez, Captain Crash and the surviving crew. Casper needs all the hugs, but Joe needs an O2 tank. Quote says Joe is the writer's room. Awkward Heretic, Devin7777, Troy Aker, Mandy Kane, Northerly K, Kim Sell, Silly Goose Honk Honk, Ad Matha, Astro Unit, Ghost Saberwolf, The Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy, Taters Precious, It's Just Steve, Sweets Martinez, Charnobyl 610, Mere Tender Creatures, Amanda Short, Chut Brimble, Deidre, Mike Whiskey and Your Friend Frosty, Nosaguaro, Benbar, Beastly Death, Sven the Unlikely, Cognito Hazard Expunged, Ted Wassanasen, Virestria, Theosis the Theologianish, Nicole I Love You But I Will Name Kid 2 Brathar, Fernwood Gal, Nellie G, Twinkle Tots, Gemini Sky, Phantom's Moms, Callison, Hornswoglin Daniel Arthur, Mike LeCluzy, It's a It's a Fucking Dog Rapture, Abigail LeHoux, King Humble, We'd Better Ask Dave, Wind Chimes for Safety, Cameron Winterborn Welsh, Fireball XL5, Mackenzie Duna, Alexica The Habanera, Code Stranger, one betty bet.

1:32:18Matt N, Monad Nick sees you seeing me, seeing you, seeing me. Frelp, M. Lin, Feed Me Fish, J.R.R. on SFP, Lahari, Ted's Loves Catherine, J. Spark, Lucid Harbor, Little Mira Leopard Paws, Diet Night, Mars Royalty, Take 20 Damage, Maisie's Bandstand, Kim Bob, Battle Pope and Bugaboo, Snorts Magortz, Fresh Squeezed, Patrick Holt, Atlas B, Hold it now. Hit it! Had it! Hit it! Hot it! Hood it! Bradley Ashby, Peter, Megan Okio, William Dyer, Vicky Hebert, Brad Menear, Jane, Hannah Dale, Phantom Zone, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled, Kilt Shot Betty and Her Steelyed Bow, Turtles All the Way Down, Jackie Lowey, The Little Pigeon, Lily the Planetary Brain, Crazed Bear.

1:33:03Coming this holiday season, Dr. Lettuce Trash Angel action figures restocked. Boot scoot to your local toy shack today. Crafty Lizard Quilts and Knits and Crochets. Noble Barrel. Yes, my brain is weird. Thank you. Megan The Mag Young. Corey Morose. Russell Bunny. Max Savage. Jenny Wren. Apprehensive Craig. Tim Aranetta. Bacon. Nicole Studioso. Rambo. Chaos Squatcher. The Homeless Guy Who Saw the Diner Disappear from Rogers and Gave Up Booze. Lord Than and Lady Sarah. Mary Kirby. Stephanie Sturgis. Kirsten. Hurry Up and Wait. Sarah Farmer and Belladonna. First of Her Name. Criddle. Twilio. Heidelbertie.

1:33:40Tom Webster. Rashmi Vinkatesh, Maclump, Azana the Leathersmith, Salazar the Dome Mage, Katie, The Bard with the Tuba, Hayward's Finest, Garen Elizondo, To My Little, You'll Always Be My Good Girl. You took a piece of my heart and left a paw print on my soul, till we meet again. Sir Shitzalot strikes again, damn animal. Ashton James, Elspeth, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Tonka 2005, Cruisin' B. Anthony, Trick Says Whorp, Tybalt the First, Stephen Schmidt, Xavier Romo, Allifrog, Trey the Turquoise Tortoise, Freya Titmittens, Courtney the Frogologist, Corey and Stephanie Say Hello, The Fawn Tucky Wrangler, Scram Brûlée, Yay, Aaron, The Singing Loon, Zuzanna, Celeste Yos, I'm So Antigone Fun, Katie and Noah, Hendrix the Stink, The Ambergler, Boodles, Osvaldo Simeone, Siobhan Delilah Rose, Ashley Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Barbarian Bloodbath, The Defenestration of Ted's, Corrine Sabrantha, Shadow Daddy, Rubius Fuzzlebutt, K-Mac, The Something Something Detective Agency, Haya Buddha, Eli the Electrician, Sunny D 'Anomaly, Charmé, K-On with Karma, Amanda Nock, The Wondrous Methasaphon, Post-Turtle Evaluation Squad, Hashtag Nissan Acura, Finnegan Robert, Jesse Foster, Samira, Flat Doug, Deary Darling, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole 23, Gracefully Impaired, Tired Pirate Muffin, Steve King, Laura, Roman Ronan, John Pruitt, Camel Pope, Inshuldigan, Rebecca Trossel.

1:35:04See, when I said good God there are so many names, the names weren't their own show yet. Chris from Tacoma, Mitzi Liu, Kelsey Home, Amanda Marie Catherine, Damian the Goddamn Time Lawyer, Matt Mosby, Saint Fu, Harry Fishnuts, Joshua Cody, Astronoweeb, Magno's The Civil Gnome. Welcome everybody, I'm Hydealon and I'll be leading our Midnight Burger emotional support group. Starlight, David Pierini, Techno Ranger Rick, Joe's Weezlaff, Virgo Ares Infinity, Best Buds Danny and M, Charles Q. Choi, A Bug Named Nat, C.C. Ryder, Hunter B, Rudra, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, Al Conconator. Ron Was Here, Magic Pony, Robert Oliveri, Dan Bowman, Jess Gioia, Paul A.

1:35:45Johnson, Killer Odd, Dr. Punt Gusher Esquire promised you a trip to the toy store and he means to get you there. Creator 67, Bejolanth, Leif's One True Love, Mermaid of the Dark Seas, Cosmic Shrug, Incorrigible Ross, Debra Wales, SCRB Mark 11, Maggie's Yarm, Anth Anomaly, Megan Mighty, Haunt, Purple Saline, Three Legs Are Perfectly Good, Drew and LA, Anomalous Death to PSL Vandal, The Ice Queen, Captain Blepp, Ryan, Evie Power, Terry, PJ Says What? Amelia Lucero, et al., Fear Now Doesn't Polish the Shiny Melon, Blargo Blargo Blargo, The Jazz Man, Tonight at 11,

1:36:24Lorac the Barbarianess, Zealous Pragma, Tuba Rick, It's Just Blake, Alice Malice, Disco Barbie Edition, Kelly Jane Dankey, Aaron the Optimist, Thomas Dolan, aka Casper from Another Universe, Shadney Ashra, Lucrezia, Thornis, Tamara Oliver, The Real Dirt Fairy, Marissa, Ava, no not that Ava, the one with an -

1:37:14Ang kinatatakutang pirata na si Fred Fred Burger. What the Chuck, Sono Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Todd Van Voorhis, Naya Deruso, Peachy Zatoichi, Inky the Kraken, Azula the Brave, and their ever-faithful squire Grabthar. Gin Extranius, Dancing Dog Dreams, Trinket Coralie, and Existentially Exhausted Bean.

1:37:42The Fable and Folly Network, where fiction producers flourish. Welcome to Magenta Presents, a new horror anthology hosted by me, Madam Magenta. We begin with the five-part miniseries Ghosted, starring Beth Eyre and Lucy Roslin. Perched on a rain-battered cliff edge is a former lighthouse. It's a charming, quirky boutique hotel. Owner and sole-occupant Beth has spent months renovating, absorbing its essence into her bones. It's an old building. You'll get used to it. But to Beth's horror, her first guest is a figure from a past she has tried to forget. Kira? Beth? What the fuck? Face to face for the first time in years, the pair must reckon with old mistakes, old grievances.

1:38:29Beth, speak to me. Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up. And something else. Oh, I can't bear it. What is that noise? Because the lighthouse has a past too. Beth, he's right there. Why is there blood on your hands? We need to get out of here. Kira! Kira! I can still see him!

1:38:53Subscribe to Magenta Presents wherever you listen to podcasts. See you soon, fans of the esoteric. Bye!

1:39:03Legend presents