2819: You'd Look Better With MORE Body Fat

17:31Adam Schafer:They could do all the extreme stuff, get their body fat lean, and they're going to be great. The average person chases this number, you're going to feel like garbage. Your libido is going to be down. You're overstressed with your workouts. You're over-focused on your diet. And to Adam's point, you don't look as good. You're a little bit of a distorted view on yourself, not realizing you just don't look as good. And what's crazy about this, because I know I've done this before, is you'll have friends. these people listening have had this happen i guarantee it where they're getting really lean and then their friends and family come up like you don't look good yeah but all they hear in their head is yeah it's because i'm shredded yeah it's that drift that you talk about yeah it really does happen and that's the thing is the irony of it everybody wants to look youthful right you look older yeah you know when you're too lean you just look older your skin doesn't look as is vibrant and healthy there's a saying you know there's an old there's a saying in i think it's in the fashion world in italy so and it's not a great saying but they say this to their models they say face or ass and what they mean by that is you pick either you have a round butt you have a round but you have either you can have uh you know you're going to sacrifice one or the other so you get too lean you're going to sacrifice your face your face or whatever so it's like choose one or the other oh that's funny so if you have that if you have the butt you have i don't know anyway it's a saying that they say because they they refer to getting too lean how it affects how you start to look or whatever in your face.

18:52Adam Schafer:And you do, you look older. But this message needs to get out because if you go through Instagram and you go on fitness, even if you go on wellness, which the term wellness has been so bastardized now, wellness is just fitness, but now it's packaged a little different. What I mean by that is all the wellness people now, they're still displaying this like overly lean, body focused or whatever. It just now looks like -

19:16Sal Di Stefano:You know who else is such a great example on our team? I'd love to, I've actually, I got to sit down with her and talk to her about, her whole journey and her calories and stuff like that but i've seen her before and afters and that's danny oh yeah like the her her physique to her that she's built oh yeah she's built a total

19:31Adam Schafer:different physique than what she's so strong she's so strong so strong yes and i'd like to ask her i'd

19:37Sal Di Stefano:like to ask her what she can eat calorie wise today versus what did she come from a place where she was like super restricting i think so yeah yeah yeah like and and just just it looks like a whole different person like totally different person she's so much more muscle on her body and i and i like when i talked to when we were getting ready to do corinne i asked her if she wanted to join that she's like oh not right now i'm eating and doing this and that and like the fact that she can she can eat what she wants and have that kind of flexibility and still have a physique that's like that you know and i think so so many so many people women in particular i feel like where my female clients get hung up on this this look that they remember having or seeing when they were at their leanest.

20:20Sal Di Stefano:And some of them might have had their body fat percentage. And so either it's the scale or this body fat percentage. And I guess the point I'm trying to make is we always talk about body fat percentage kind of being this gold standard. It's better than weight. Yeah, it's better. But it still can be very distorted, especially for women. Because muscle hasn't been promoted so much for women as it has been men for a really long time. So this goes both ways.

20:46Adam Schafer:And they're also advertised from an image perspective or much heavier than that. It's the fashion industry is really, yeah. It's the fashion, the fitness, the health, the wellness. Like everything geared towards women is so focused on how you look. And it's coming from these really body dysmorphic people. Unfortunately, they're the ones that tend to get the voices in our space. You know one of the best things you could do, really? One of the best things you could do, this is both men and women, but especially women, is change your algorithm on your social media. Like consciously change it. When you're going through and you're seeing bodies projected to you, pictures of bodies and how they look and they're, you know, check.

21:26Adam Schafer:Click on the whatever is a little, the three dots and say, I want to see less of this. And you have to do this every day because the algorithm is so smart that it'll revert back very quickly. So every day just say less of this. I want less of this in my brain, less of this in my brain. And you would be surprised at how positively that impacts your heart.

21:43Sal Di Stefano:By the way, I know you actively do that. I actively like the things that I want. Like I actually, I go like every, it's like an exercise I do now where I will look at my Explorer page to see if it's in, my goal, literally my goal is always it to be like all the things that I want. That you actually want. Yeah, yeah, that I want to be consuming that I'm into or whatever that I think is, you know, healthier or better, right? For whatever reason. You actually go and click on it and then say, show me less of this. Yes. Where do you see, where is that?

22:16Adam Schafer:So when you click, so when you're scrolling, when something comes up, you can click on. The picture? I think there's like little dots. Yeah, the little dots. And you can say less of this or don't show me this.

22:28Sal Di Stefano:And so it's like literally on the, like in my feed, I have like, I'm on Instagram right now. Okay, here's perfect. I've done that on Facebook. I haven't done that on Instagram. Yeah, so I've done it. Why you're seeing this post, request community note.

22:39Adam Schafer:Yeah, so I've done it on X a lot because that's the one that I'll be on. and that one bro their algorithm's fast on x oh my god that's so quick dude you you look at one thing and then you get five more i have a hard time with x just because it's so raw sometimes

22:54Sal Di Stefano:i forget that you're mostly on x right now i'm trying to figure out how to do it there's a way

22:59Adam Schafer:to do it on all of them it's a good thing right now i'm going through my thing right now i've yet to see something i don't okay here's you could also do with ads by the way oh yeah i do that all

23:06Sal Di Stefano:the time yeah so okay here okay not interested that's right okay so so not interested okay here's why this is don't suggest these posts anymore don't suggest posts with certain words snooze all suggest posts and okay that's right now the reason why this it's so important to do this this post made me feel uncomfortable yeah so and you know what that's i think that's the strongest

23:26Adam Schafer:one i think that's the strongest signal is that one right there yeah yeah because i've done that it's and it's stronger because you have to like repeatedly say don't show me this don't show me so the algorithms are so sensitive that it picks up micro fractions of a second longer that you hover oh it tracks your eyes yeah yeah so if you're like scrolling through oh no

23:47Sal Di Stefano:that's so i know pause for so you're longer so your your your point this is why i have to check back on my explorer page is because i only like these the things that i want but to me but even if i get caught looking at something for a minute even if i don't like it it'll still start to it'll to still change my explore page and feed it back to me again yeah so that's why i was asking you why like how you do because the way i do it is like i get good at just really liking all the stuff that i want but you also have to say don't yeah because if you don't it knows that you pause

24:18Adam Schafer:for a second it's bad it'll it'll feed again it's it's a self-adjusting in the moment on the fly kind of brilliant when you think like from their point you know it's brilliant yeah and it's and you that means you have to bro you have to i'll give you guys an example hack your impulsive nature i told the story already but i saw it so my wife will be it's okay with it but i'll tell it again so there was uh there was a period we're going somewhere and i was like like oh maybe i should get some like it's like sexy lingerie for my wife right so i went and looked up like you know i've told you about this happened to me and so as soon as i did that bro some of those emails so hold on so as soon as i did that when i would go on social media you know the little ads that post underneath little ads would post for lingerie but they're like bro it's like yeah it's like a half naked chick like right and i don't want to see that because soft porn for sure i just don't want to see that i've had issues with like you know looking at stuff in the past and so i just consciously now look away and so i had to go don't show me this this is offensive i had to do like four times yeah before it stopped like i kept getting ads and i have to i had to keep doing that i've bought a lot of like it'll be so i can't get away from like there's probably at least six

25:23Sal Di Stefano:different brands that i've bought from and so they all they've all got me you know what i'm saying they find me dude wherever i'm at oh dude try to unsubscribe from those emails and then you get

25:32Adam Schafer:one of those emails like wow i can do this but i tell you what just for people listening like if you you have to consciously do this every day but change your algorithm because it shifts how you view the world but more importantly how you view yourself are you guys are you guys

25:47Sal Di Stefano:noticing with your teens um any news any like new like behaviorals around it like them organically not what you're restricting or telling. Do you think that you're seeing an increase in their addiction to it? Or are they naturally starting? Because one of the things that we predicted - Oh, like generally? Yeah, that this generation coming up is becoming, it's more common that they're like -

26:11Adam Schafer:I put really strong restrictions on my daughter. So she only gets 10 minutes of Instagram. She has no TikTok.

26:19Sal Di Stefano:Do you find yourself, so where I guess I'm getting at with you guys, because you guys both have teens, that were part of the height of this stuff. Is it always a battle? Is it something that's getting easier? Is it getting harder? What's it like managing it for the kids? It's getting a lot easier. It's getting easier. You just got to stick to your nose. He's a lot more mature with it than he was. It was a battle, dude, for a while. Yeah. I didn't want to give him a phone at all. And that was really hard for me to reconcile.

26:47Adam Schafer:That was a mistake I made, was I gave my daughter has a phone. Yeah. Like my younger kids, they're not getting one. They're not getting one until it's absolutely necessary, which I don't know. We'll see.

26:56Sal Di Stefano:What were the two? How early did you do your daughter and how early did you do your boys? So let's see. Did I get my daughter eighth grade?

27:03Adam Schafer:Eighth grade? I think it was eighth grade. Yeah, Ethan was 13. It might have been eighth. Is that when you were 13? He was seven. Seventh grade. I think, yeah, in the seventh grade. It might have been seventh grade for me, too, because I think it was right on the same age. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So, I mean, yeah, here's the thing. Ideally, in the ideal situation, you know,

27:21Sal Di Stefano:if you can you know wait that would be you know what i get what i mean it's real easy sitting from my seat right to say but i understand uh and i can only imagine how difficult it was for the two of you at the the timing of it is that because i already see it with my son's age uh parents that like like his best friend and uh we're really close to him like they they don't they restrict tech from his kid or their kid their kid doesn't get an ipad like like ours and so it makes it easy when the best friend doesn't too i was just gonna say that's the that's the

27:56Adam Schafer:easier way to do it is if you if you have cultivate the fringe yeah yeah no i mean that's

28:01Sal Di Stefano:what katrina and i have talked about and plan to do and it seems uh and i don't want to say it's easy but it's probably easier for me than it was for you guys when nobody was really paying attention when everybody thought it was everyone i mean your guys's generation or meaning your guys kids generation you were probably told if they don't learn tech they're going to be behind if they don't they don't learn to use it those the computer the outliers by waiting for sure yeah he had to wait right you know a couple years to catch up to his friends text messages you know

28:31Adam Schafer:what helps too a lot and i'm sure justin could speak to this uh when they're busy doing things like sports and stuff that's when they're when they have nothing to do uh i preach that from you know the mountains dude i'd have to keep them busy you know it honestly idle hands the devil's work it for real whoever like said that like that is such truth yeah i said a long time ago too that's what's crazy who said that find out i don't know who said that but philosopher and i mean i because even with my oldest it's like you know he'll he'll do a good job with tech but then you know he's roaming around town and all these things and it's like he's getting bored and it's It's like they find their way into mischief.

29:13Just like, you know, and it's like now I'm battling that. And it's like, it's just one of those things.

29:18Sal Di Stefano:But you prefer that, right? I do prefer that. It's funny you say that because my buddy Mike, his kid's similar age, right? And we talked a lot about this for the last couple of years and everything. And he's really active dad. He's into cars, always trying to get his boy to come do the car event. His kid's not really into it. He'd rather stay at home on the computer or on the games and stuff like that. and he recently has got into those electric dirt bikes. Yes. And he's like hardcore to it, but he's like, he rolls around with a group of kids that are like getting in trouble. And they don't just go.

29:48Sal Di Stefano:The cops have busted them because they go past where they're supposed to. Way farther than we ever did when we were kids. And so he's so - Because they're electric. Yes. And they go like 50 miles an hour, bro. Yeah. And so he's like so conflicted because he's like, for the last five years, I've been fighting to get him out of the house. Now he's out of the house, but then he's getting into mischief and I'm like, you know, I think I'd rather have that. I'd rather have him learn the consequences of the cop getting you in trouble for riding that bike where you're not supposed to than sitting plugged into a game all day.

30:18Adam Schafer:Can we just say straight up? There's always something. Raising kids, especially teenagers, is hard. It is. It's hard, dude. It's anxiety riddled. They want the independence of an adult, but they have the mind of a child, and they're rebellious by nature. I got this. You don't even know what you're doing? yeah dude you actually know nothing you realize you know nothing i love to i love arguing with teenagers yeah i mean it's crazy how early that is

30:47Sal Di Stefano:how ingrained that is because i my son said that to my wife last night mom i got this you know it was over something you know whatever but it's like the fact that they they're they already start doing that it's an independent mind coming through you know i'm saying like i got this

31:00Adam Schafer:mom it's so hard too because when you want you want to tell them like no no this is this is how it works yeah you know like half the time telling them is like makes them harden even more yeah and you got to let them work through it too so it's like i've had to really check myself a lot of times with that uh because i i will be like you know try and squash his energy with that like well you don't know what you're doing i'm like let him figure it out let him work through it let him stumble my favorite is you have every one of your kids try to like tell you like figure out how much it would cost to like live on their own they have no idea oh yeah oh well if i made this much money oh yeah you you you would be able to pay rent in a room bro i know you know but that's

31:40Sal Di Stefano:that's why i really liked uh what book was that that i read i wish uh it's i've ever i've recommended it on the on the podcast before but it talked about the the four stages of oh yeah yeah yeah oh i gotta read that one yeah and you guys and that's you guys are coaching phase and really when you think about it that's good coach it's like you you tell them a game changer for me yes you know that yeah when my daughter it's been a game you're like a coach you're not daddy mode anymore you're not telling them what to do all the time it's like hey you do this this and this this will help you you play that you show the play here's a potential consequence that's right you show the play i'm gonna let you figure it out yeah and you know we're gonna you encourage why they should run the play this way and then when they veer off and do their own thing and they get tackled behind the line or they get hurt or then the thing happens like that's why dad told

32:26Adam Schafer:you this is the play it's been such a game changer for lessons for me and my daughter because i actually had to verbalize it to her like listen we're moving a new phase it's the coaching phase and there was a period there where it was like is this actually working because she's but then i'd sit down with her said look uh i'm not going to tell you you have to do this right remember we're in the coaching phase but you need to hear me because if i feel like you're not hearing me and if you feel like you're just shutting me down yeah then we're going to go backwards and we're going to the other phase where i force you yeah and it's actually it's actually improved our I think it's a great idea to communicate even to the kid,

32:56Sal Di Stefano:like letting them know that. I think that's a great, I didn't know you did that. I think that's a great idea is to be like, hey, I recognize that we're transitioning from me being daddy, tell you what to do all the time, to you want to learn things, do things on your own. And I can appreciate that. I love that. The language is more like, might I make a suggestion? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

33:15Adam Schafer:That's like my new verbiage. Yeah, yeah. Or let me tell you how that played out for dad. But then go. I definitely gave him a lot bigger area that he can venture out and have adventures and do his thing but it's at home we're just like I mean and we're also that's because you track your kids you also track your kids nobody knew where we were going I don't my wife does and then I find out I'm like oh what's the other way over there

33:39Sal Di Stefano:yeah that's the part that trips me out is like how much my buddy Mike they have air tag on his kid too so it's like so they can see when he's going beyond where he was told to with that so it's like this now you're challenged with this like do i say something do i say something he's not you know it only affects me because like then it gets dark and like i have to go pick up on my truck because he gotta take the bike and put it in the truck and his friend and you know it becomes like i'm like look you brought me into this the whole idea is for you to have that freedom and independence you come back you do the right thing then you get to do it again now you know we're not going to have that much freedom and you have to earn it back

34:15Adam Schafer:yeah yeah i think about some of the stuff i did when i was a teenager like when we would ride off now we'd have electric bikes but we had a regular bike but we would take off and we would do things

34:23Sal Di Stefano:man i look back i'm like you know how do you guys both make peace too how do you guys both make peace with this also because you also know that so imagine you have the kid who's the opposite who listens to everything doesn't go beyond because i think about this from my perspective because my kid seems to be different with a lot of the stuff and my fear is i also know that the those traits that you guys both have and you see in your kids are also the things that made you great entrepreneurs and successful at life because you are willing to stretch the boundaries, to think outside the box, to not just fall in line with what the other people say.

34:58Sal Di Stefano:Like there's some characteristics that come with that.

35:01Adam Schafer:More than that, Adam, when you look at the data on it, because that could definitely happen, but you know what the data shows more often than not is that they're going to go through a rebellious phase. And so if they don't do it as teenagers, then they do it in college. yes or or i'd rather it be now or i have a lot of friends like this i have friends like this who are doctors okay so they were very regimented very disciplined call it and they wow out when they and then when they finally are done with medical school off the rails now i'm gonna go through my

35:29Sal Di Stefano:rebellion figure 30 that's i mean that's a recipe for peter pan syndrome right i mean that's like how that ends up happening to a lot of probably now how did it so we're doing the perspective from the husband right i imagine this is even more difficult for the wives to let to let go and let like a lot of the risky stuff especially too and like he it's funny because like i love it because he's back into climbing on things and and you know like he'll go on these uh bridges and things are super sketchy and i'm like uh you know like and courtney will find out about it but you know i i'm just glad that he's adventuring and like being in the world and doing these things so i'm like you know i'm okay with some of these risks he's taking you know that it's dangerous you can get hurt and this and that but so that i would prefer that that that's an example of where you can be more laxed and she's probably more freaked out yeah where's the flip of that where is she more laxed and you're a little more and she's like hey dude calm down he'll be okay like is there is there an example that or she almost always that way and you're almost always the one who's more like that and same thing for you so like is there a push and pull for you guys where there are certain things she's more laxed about and you're more like over and she's like, hey, chill out, let him figure it out.

36:43Sal Di Stefano:Or is it all things? Because obviously the risk thing - I'm trying to think of an example.

36:49Adam Schafer:I'll guess, I'll guess. I bet it's probably when you show a lot of anger then she needs to calm down. I'll bet that's probably when it kicks in. Oh, when I'm angry with him? Yeah, when you start to lose it, she's probably like, well, okay. Oh yeah, she calms me down when it's like, I use that as something to like capture attention and like snap out of like his state like so I don't I don't raise my voice unless it's like very intentional uh but yeah I do do that sometimes she it freaks her out scares her you know sometimes because I'll let that out just to let everybody know I got teeth you know it's like you know there's consequences there's value

37:27Sal Di Stefano:to that though too I think uh a great way to communicate that is to when you do it intentional and you're detached from the emotion, it's a very powerful tool. When you do it in a response emotionally is when it's bad, right? So that's - Remove the reaction of it. Right, right. But that's hard. Oh, of course. That's a discipline. Yeah, no, that's a - That's a discipline. No, that's a very difficult - I think that, I was trying to think of an example with girls in a relationship and all that. And I'm more like, don't even worry about all that. That'll come down the road. And I'm not trying to make it happen where he's going to hang out and go on a date or like, you know, and she's all like, yeah, how's it going with so-and-so?

38:08And, you know, she gets all into the relationship side of it. And I'm just like, dude, stop asking about that, you know. Yeah, yeah. He'll figure it out. Yeah, this is a distraction. You don't need this right now, son.

38:18Adam Schafer:Yeah, that's like my energy. I think you're right. You're the right one, dude. With that kind of stuff. Yeah, that's a total distraction when you're a kid. Oh, totally. Yeah, I mean, she loves the idea of him, you know, having a relationship with a girl. And I appreciate that. Until the girl does something mean to him, I'm sure then Mama Bear is going to come.

38:36Sal Di Stefano:Now, are you the opposite of your house? So my sister-in-law and brother-in-law are the opposite here. My sister-in-law is the one who lets the kids climb the trees, fall, bruise themselves, whatever. And my brother-in-law is more like boundaries, overprotective that way. You seem like that to me.

38:54Adam Schafer:It depends. I mean, it really does depend on the situation, I would say. We have a different dynamic with the little ones than we do with my daughter because my daughter's with us every other week. Plus she has her mom who's also involved. So Jessica has a parental, definitely a parental role with my daughter, but she's also got this, which I think it's an advantage, is she kind of gets to be the cool stepmom, where she can kind of step in and have those conversations.

39:20Sal Di Stefano:Right, she almost fell naturally into the coaching phase versus you had to transition from being daddy, daddy everything.

39:27Adam Schafer:And then also just being divorced, having her half the time. Like that causes its own challenges. Like, you know, you want to discipline, but I see you. I didn't see you last week. And so now you're here. A window. Yeah. And like, what do we do?

39:39Sal Di Stefano:Well, how often does that happen where, and what's more like where, because you have that, since that's an interesting dynamic for me to ask about, is that, you know, you're wanting your daughter to explore something or you're wanting her to fall on her own or allow it. And then your ex is like, no. Like how often does that happen where you don't, you guys don't agree with like, like either restricting, restricting something or boundaries or like.

40:08Adam Schafer:Oh, I got to be careful what I say here because I don't want to put too much out there. But I would say like right now we're looking at colleges, even though she's not, you know, she's not going to be going for a couple of years. But I'm much more interested in the culture of the college than I am how cool it is or how nice it is or even what she thinks she wants. I'm interested more in the culture because I think it's super influential on a kid whereas my ex-wife is more like where she want to go yeah where she want to go and this is a great college maybe that's the one she wanted to go to that she didn't go to maybe there's a piece of that so there's some disagreement oh that's an interesting one bro

40:48Sal Di Stefano:I feel like you lose that no matter what no

40:50Adam Schafer:no because I pay

40:56Sal Di Stefano:boom Boom. That's a great response. My first initial was like, oh, bro, you definitely lose that one. Well, actually, I write the fucking check.

41:07Adam Schafer:I don't want to pull it, but if I have to, I'm like, cool. She can go to that one if you pay for it. I don't care. She can go to that one. Oh, my God. What a good point. Oh, my God. I was like, you think you're going to win that one, bro? You're losing that one for sure. I write the check. Yeah. So ultimately, that's the trip card. I'll weigh all that out. You know, don't get me wrong. It's a little while from now, so maybe things will change. That's funny. Yeah. We're going to go look at some, in fact, in a month. I won't say where they are because it's just out of privacy. But we'll be looking.

41:37It is the time though because, yeah, my oldest is the same age and he's interested in looking at colleges right now.

41:42Adam Schafer:Yeah. But you know, there's a culture on campuses and different colleges have different cultures. Well, that's school in general. Totally. Yeah, that's school in general. But I heard this argument. I'm very particular about that. I was talking to friends about this and I heard this argument like, oh there's bad cult kids and good kids in every college yeah i know that's true okay i get it you can go to the best culture but still run into the wrong crowd but the odds are better like let's not

42:04Sal Di Stefano:forget like the odds are better i think as a dad i'd rest what i'd have a hard time with um is if my daughter or son is wanting to go to school or like their three best friends or two or three best friends are going and they want to go to that school even though it may not be my favorite school for them to go to but it's where their best friends are going that they went to high school with and grew up that makes a difference because that would make a hard versus she's going off to somewhere where she's starting all over no matter what and she really wants to go to this place and i'm like i don't know about chico state or arizona state or whatever the state is i think either you go this direction that's good for them though you know it's also that i think because i mean for me it was transformative it was like i think we don't have that rite of passage anymore and i think if we can look at college as like maybe an extension of that it's like you got to go off and reinvent

42:51Adam Schafer:yourself that's there's there's so much potential value in that yeah i mean as a kid you can yeah

42:56Sal Di Stefano:but i also think that has a lot to do with probably you both evaluating their friends currently too though of course like i don't want you to like oh yeah i mean i mean they'll still reconnect like i you know i don't know it depends of course my my my best friend and i go all the way back to fourth grade so and so and my other one all the way back to ninth grade so of course you can so i'm definitely somebody who believes that we can and i went different states all the things right so but i think that if i if i liked my son's you know core group of buddies and they're like hey we're all going to santa barbara yeah you know college after high school uh and he really was a huge pool yeah i would i would have a really hard time and let's say it's not my favorite you

43:37Adam Schafer:know there's another piece here that we're not even talking about which i've never i kind of had this opinion before but now even more so especially in two years or four years uh is it necessary oh yeah no i definitely is it necessary to go to college yeah this is what i fight with court oh yeah because the roi i don't think it's in a lot of cases is not worth it like in a lot of situations the degree you get is not worth the cost that you spent you would have been better off maybe not going yep and there's a lot of things now you can go learn in college that i'm looking at ai and i'm like bro by the time you graduate it'll be interesting they better Their shift, yeah, their options.

44:15Totally.

44:16Sal Di Stefano:Well, that's what I was going to say, Justin. It's going to be interesting how you tackle that. It's a weird time. Especially if your kid tells you that they want to go do and study. Yeah. Right. Right? Because they give you some. That matters big time. Yeah, I feel like that totally matters. Yeah. Because it's like that. Oh, yeah. I'd rather get them in a mentorship, internship somewhere where it's a direct placement for

44:36Adam Schafer:something that they want to do. I think it's such a better path. Yeah, I've been talking to my daughter about businesses that require people. So like, do you like, cause she kind of wants to work with people. So I'm like, okay, those, those, there's certain careers that will probably always need that. Like occupational therapy, physical therapy, maybe even, you know, you know, cognitive behavioral therapy where you're working with a person. And I'm sure regulations will prevent AI from doing that kind of stuff. Like that, that I could see that potential, but like, bro, it was just, just six years ago, going to school for coding was like, this is the best thing you could do.

45:09Adam Schafer:Now they're like, don't do that. Irrelevant. Did you know that I'm watching interviews, I've seen a couple of interviews or clips of people in tech who run these big companies, and they're like, oh, our coders haven't written a single line of code since December. What?

45:23Sal Di Stefano:It's all AI. I imagine one of the most popular degrees in the next two to four years is going to be AI degrees. Degrees in the ability to program, run, and - By the time they graduate, that's going to be irrelevant. That's what I'm trying to say, dude.

45:39Adam Schafer:But it's changing so quick. I mean, maybe.

45:42Sal Di Stefano:Bro, you know, each four years? Yeah, but the ones that studied it are going to be on the front line of knowing how that's going to impact.

45:48Adam Schafer:Either that or if you love it, why don't you go learn it? Yeah, but then the CEO will just be able to do everything. Yeah, why don't you just go learn it? Go learn it on your own right now. Because whenever they come out with another version, which is like however months later, six months later.

45:59Sal Di Stefano:That's easy for 40-something-year-old us to say, tell that to a 17-year-old. Yeah. Go teach yourself this. Yeah, good luck. Well, I mean, if they're into it. That's part of the big benefit too. I mean, I remember when I was 17, I didn't know for sure. I had ideas. I mean, I went through, I'm going to be an architect. I'm going to be a lawyer. I'm going to be a physical therapist. I went through a lot of different things I was going to be or what I wasn't sure. I almost went almost enlisted. So it's like part of the good part of the college, I'd say, still is that ability to still try different classes, meet different people with different opinions and views and maybe backgrounds with different dads and moms that have jobs.

46:41Sal Di Stefano:It's like, and just being exposed to other things that maybe you and your little bubble would have never thought you would.

46:49Adam Schafer:God, I wonder if the future of being enlisted is they're going to look at your resume and you're going to be like, Oh, how good are you? Call of duty level? Yes. Oh yeah, bro. 100%. Dude, it's going to be like, Oh, you're level 56 in call of duty. Yeah. You're in. You're in dude. That's going to be so wild. It's weird to think about. All right, let's change directions here real quick because I was looking up the toxins that they find in farmed fish versus wild caught. Oh, wow. It's pretty bad. It's so bad that the fish changes sex in there? Sometimes. Yes. Sometimes. So like higher in heavy metals, pesticides.

47:28You can't really win though, right?

47:29Adam Schafer:Say what? You can't really win because even the ocean, like deep sea fish, They have to find better ways to farm fish, I think. And you're right. It's the one place we get meat in the wild. We don't do that anymore anywhere else. We don't hunt cows.

47:44Sal Di Stefano:Doug, can you pull up a screenshot too? Because I know that they do this with farm fish. You know, they dye the fish so it will look like it's wild. Oh, yeah. Like how different does it look if they didn't dye it?

47:57Adam Schafer:What's crazy to me is there's a dramatic difference in the taste of just farmed salmon versus wild salmon. Yeah. If you put them next to it and I ate each one and I didn't know any better, I'd be like, this is a different fish. And it's like the fat content. It's the fat content, the fat amount, the fatty acid profile. Yeah, the profile. It's all so different. That's crazy. That's not saying it's unhealthy, but it's definitely better to go farmed salmon or not injected with diet. They are fed pigments. That's what it is. Ah, okay. They're fed pigments. Interesting. Yeah. But while some, often synthetic, pigments are added to feed, Oh, so there you go.

48:31Adam Schafer:Same difference. Give them red number 40. Well, I mean, one of the unknown things that ButcherBox does, because we talk about grass-fed meat all the time, their heritage pork, they have a great selection of farmed fish.

48:46Sal Di Stefano:I still got to smoke mine. I've got -

48:48Adam Schafer:Farm fish, wild fish. I'm sorry, wild fish. Sorry, thanks, Doug. You have a great selection. I have to read. That was terrible. You have a great selection of wild caught fish. They don't sell farm. It's all wild.

48:58Sal Di Stefano:I have some in my freezer right now that I got from them that I have I've been telling Doug I want to I want to smoke it yeah I want to I haven't I haven't

49:04Adam Schafer:I haven't personally smoked salmon when you smoke salmon you're not cooking it right or you are it

49:09Sal Di Stefano:is it's just it's a slow cook with with smoke yeah yeah yeah it's a slow it's a slow I mean in my opinion it's the I rarely ever use my gas grill ever almost only if I'm like if I'm in a hurry to cook cook meat for something or maybe because I'm smoking on one and I'm using it for something else that i'm using the gas grill for but slow cooking meat over smoke is such a you know what

49:34Adam Schafer:you know uh doug taught me in regards to salmon years ago we went to an advertising uh like i don't know what it was convention or something like that a course down in san diego and he was ordering salmon i never heard somebody say this before you order steak what do they ask you the temperature right medium rare whatever yeah he'd be like i'll have a salmon uh and i want it medium rare. I'm like, you can say that with fish? And so I started doing that. Oh my God, it's way better. Oh my God, it's way better. Yeah, they don't even ask you. They just cook it. Bro, salmon cooked medium is delicious.

50:06Sal Di Stefano:Because overcooked fish is dry. Yeah, it's dry. Yeah, yeah. And you can eat fish raw. I mean, if you like salmon sashimi, then why not have it on almost the raw side and you're probably better off. Again, too, this is why I want to smoke it because I smoke it to kind of a raw. Juicy? Yeah. Before we got on air, I didn't even know today was ButcherBox. Doug and I were talking about salmon, asking where you can get it like that. I'll do it. I'll do it, and then I'll report back. My goal is to do it before the next season.

50:34Adam Schafer:I got to show you guys. I'm going to share this with you, Doug, so you can put it up on the screen. Do you guys want to see the coolest? This is not AI. This is a reel. It's confirmed. It's a Russian wrestler. I can't even say his name. Forget it. I'm not going to say his name. Doug, put on the screen, this move that he did with three seconds left in the match. So it's three seconds left. He's down. Okay. And he does this move, bro. And by the way, I will argue this all day long, that I think overall general athleticism, I think wrestlers, high-level wrestlers, are the best displays. I can't disagree.

51:12Sal Di Stefano:Well, we see that in UFC still, with all these mixed martial arts. The guys that have the high pedigrees in wrestling almost always are top. They're just animals.

51:20Adam Schafer:Okay, click on that, and then... You're a different kind of human. Watch this. This is with three seconds left. Watch what he does. Ready? Jumps. Oh. What? Boom. He flipped over him? He jumps over him, gets him in a body lock, and then - That's sick. That's sick. I've never even seen that before. Yeah. Was that just like a spontaneous idea and he just jumped? Well, that's a real move. That's a real move? That's a real move. I've never seen anybody do that. If you go over the top of someone, you jump over. so you bring your feet over and then you twist and do this kind of like, but he did it from a jump.

51:56Adam Schafer:So he wasn't like on top of the guy and then he did it from a jump. What a sick move. To catch him? Like the Saquon Barkley of wrestling. Twist your body? Yeah, what a sick move. Side suplex or whatever? Yeah, yeah. Did you just pop up in your feet or something? It's all been viral, right? So speaking of algorithms, my algorithm often times will have wrestling and judo on there because I love wrestling. I mean, that's a cool move right there. Isn't that rad? Yeah, yeah, that's super cool. All right, I got some studies to pull up on Manukora honey. Some really cool studies on Manukora honey, which is kind of wild.

52:27Adam Schafer:So I'm going to go through some of these. The healing honey. You should call it that.

52:31Sal Di Stefano:Bro. I want to try it on a cut. Dude, it's crazy.

52:35Adam Schafer:Man, you put it on post-surgical wounds and you get your heel faster. It shortens healing times for burns and surgical wounds. So if you have a burn, put Manukora honey on it. Put a band-aid over it. It'll heal faster. uh it's good it's also delicious don't lick it off bro it's also good for gingivitis so yeah dude so if you have like inflamed gums or whatever you could i know because of the sugar no it's the mgo and i think it's called is it mgo that's in there that is uh anti-microbial i don't know it's because i have caps but sometimes i get like bloody you know gums like that you're just you're gritting it do everything hard to eat rocks uh did you guys know that honey was more effective than over-the-counter cough suppressants for kids?

53:24Adam Schafer:No way. Yeah. There's a 2010 study. Because it coats the throat? No, it actually is a compound. More effective than the cough syrup? For kids. So they have stronger cough stuff for adults. So there are compounds in honey that actually affect the part of the brain that causes the cough reflex. Oh, I see. Okay, so it calms it down. It actually reduces the cough reflex. Interesting.

53:45Sal Di Stefano:What is the prescription? Just one teaspoon of honey? Yeah. Is that what?

53:51Adam Schafer:Yeah, a couple times a day. The next time Max gets a cough, I'm so going to try.

53:54Sal Di Stefano:And it tastes good. I know. I'm still going to try that versus giving some cough syrup.

53:58Adam Schafer:Put it in like lemon tea. Just let him take it straight off the spoon. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's not like it tastes good. You just do hot water lemon. You don't got to hide it or anything like that. It's also good for H. pylori. So if you have H. pylori issues in the gut or gut issues due to inflammation, consuming it is good for that. I made it. This is like nature's. I know.

54:20Sal Di Stefano:We just went through colds in our household, like, what is it, a couple of weeks ago when we were all talking on the show, and I made Katrina and I hot toddies with the honey. Yeah, I love those. I actually was... What is it? It's whiskey? You know, that's the first time. Whiskey. Yeah, and lime. Fresh squeeze lime, whiskey, and then water, and then the honey. Oh, okay. And then you could actually put a little bit. I did it twice.

54:44Adam Schafer:You could put the cinnamon stick. And then I put a cinnamon stick in there. They used to give that to kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think they used to give that to kids when they had coughs.

54:49Sal Di Stefano:Dude, I have actually never - No shots of whiskey for kids. So only because recently, like alcohol has been a part of my life, right? Since we've been doing this. I've never done that. I've never made a hot toddy when I don't feel good. It's never thought, I've never thought I would want alcohol when I wasn't feeling good. I'm like, you know what? I'm going to make myself one. I knew I had the monocular honey. So I'm like, I'll use that. I have a lemon tree. So I did a fresh squeezed lemon. It was like, Katrina was like, oh my God, this feels so good. All the ingredients in it. Yeah. It's going to be a go-to move for me the next time I have cold.

55:22Sal Di Stefano:It's not a bad call.

55:24Adam Schafer:You might have to do that next time. I mean, you have to have before you feel better.

55:26Sal Di Stefano:I mean, I had two. I had two. You can make them pretty stiff, you know what I'm saying? And the cinnamon stick is, I made the first one with no cinnamon, just water. And then I made another one where I did a cinnamon stick. And then I did it another time with apple cider, which has kind of a cinnamon flavor too instead of the water. Okay. So if someone who can't handle the straight whiskey water. It's more like a hot cider. Yeah, so probably like if you were. Dickens? Yeah. Dickens. I love that brand. It's a great brand. You did it. Yeah. For people right there, dude. I wanted to hear your money and happiness.

56:04Sal Di Stefano:Oh, I'll bring it up again. Because I saw you posting your story, and I wanted to argue with you.

56:07Adam Schafer:Yeah, no, no. So no, there's a lot of data around this. Everybody loves me to argue. Yeah, no, no. There's a lot of data. We've seen this before. I've shown you this data before. but uh so uh they've done a lot of studies on money and happiness and the reason why they do these studies is when people besides the necessities because you need money for things that are necessary and a certain amount to feel secure right so above and beyond that um people still oftentimes desire more money i want to make more money and you know when you boil it down and you ask people like why do you want more money it all boils down to i think it'll make me happier.

56:41Adam Schafer:Now it might start out by saying, well, I want a bigger house or I want a new car. I want to go on this vacation. But then you keep asking why, well, why, why, why, why? And it's because, well, it'll make me happier. So they've done a lot, actually lots of studies on this, on what's the best ROI on money for happiness. So, so what's the best use of this extra money where you're going to get the most happiness in return? Okay. And so, and so, well, yeah. So Thanks for giving it away. Yeah, no problem. The end of the story.

57:13Adam Schafer:So they've tested it. The worst is to buy things. That's the worst. So buying something, you get a spike in happiness, but then you can't repeat that. So if you buy the same thing again, there's no effect. And then the happiness wears off quickly and then it flatlines. So you buy a new purse, you buy cool shoes or whatever. And for the most part, generally what we see in the data is you get this spike and it drops down quickly and then nothing else. And then if you repeat it again, it's like a drug. You just get no effect, right? Get the same exact purse again. There's no spike in happiness. Then the second, which is better, is experiences.

57:48Adam Schafer:So this is where you spend on like a vacation. Because you create memories as you go. Yes. And so you see a longer happiness spike. And then when you think about that, depending on what happened, the more meaningful the experience, the better the reoccurring happiness from thinking about it. nonetheless you still get this diminishing return over time so i keep thinking about it unless it was profound experience like this is when i met my wife or this is when i had my child or something like that you get this diminishing return and you still get this kind of like like a like a drugs like a like your body gets used to it and so if i think about that vacation 20 years later uh unless it was this profound thing um i really don't get this happiness again and then the last one which which was wild is now there's some parameters around it, but the last one is if you use your money in a way where you voluntarily give it to someone to help them.

58:41Adam Schafer:And if you really want to maximize this, according to the data, you see the outcome. So like you have a friend who's struggling, uh, evicted from their house or they're sick and they need medical bills and then you're able to step in and help them. And then you see passively, but you're like following it all the way. Yeah. that then you get this high spike in happiness that lasts a long time. And then what they do in these studies, as long as they follow the people, so however long the study is, every time they recall that event, they get a similar spike in happiness with no drop. So it's like, hey, remember that time we helped our friend in that situation?

59:20Adam Schafer:Or hey, remember when we donated to those to help feed the poor or we did that mission trip? They get the same spike. And so if your ROI, if you're interested in is happiness, the best ROI based on the data is to give it away, which I think is really, really interesting. It's crazy. Really cool.

59:37Sal Di Stefano:So I knew where you were going to go with that. That's why I wanted you to talk about it because I've thought a lot about this. And I think independent of each of those things that make sense logically, but I also think that there's a way that all three of those can be fed. I'll give you an example. What do you mean fed? I'll give you an example. Meaning like a materialistic thing that gives the other two.

1:00:29Sal Di Stefano:Oh, okay. 10 or 15 parties in less than a year so like once a month practically where i host 30 40 50 in my family one of my favorite things to do so it's like uh it's it is a materialistic thing right

1:00:43Adam Schafer:yeah but that's not what's giving you the happiness right so it's enabling the thing

1:00:47Sal Di Stefano:right so so like like i think uh like um comparing uh those three cycles like i would say my shoes falls in that category sure once you buy one then you're on to the next one whatever it's like only serves me you know i'm saying it's like very but there's things like and then i would even make that argument like my buddy and i who's a who's a car nut like who's he's been in cars for a long time uh longer even longer than i have and we were having lunch one day after a drive and uh these these kids it was there's two special needs kids came up talking to us and they pulled out and they were oh they're so excited and uh we both let them get in and out of the car and stuff like that and him and i were make having this conversation that that's one of my favorite parts about that right like the initial enjoyment of the purchase and the drive of it once you've done all the cool things in it but actually one of the gift that keeps giving about it is being able to share that experience to someone's like i've never sat right or driven in one of these and so i i don't think it's as simple as this like you can't get any of these other benefits

1:01:45Adam Schafer:from material things what they call it is um uh god there's a term for it it's like if it uh if there's a social component that's not the term that they use so like an example would be like a guy who is pursuing growing his business because he wants to make more money but he uses that money to i don't know i'll use an extreme example build orphanages right now he's got incredible right happiness from building his business right so yeah i think you could tie lots of like like lots of different things that's why i said with the experience i think it depends what happens in the experience like oh man i went on this trip with my wife or you know the time we were dating and this is when I proposed to her.

1:02:24Adam Schafer:And so then, you know, you remember that. Yeah, yeah. So it's true. But generally speaking, and I know this because, or I think this is, people believe this, maybe not consciously, but subconsciously, maybe even sometimes consciously, because companies advertise to us what gives them profit, which is to buy things. Yeah. And the way that they sell it to us is they don't sell us the thing, they sell us the dream of what the thing provides. Yeah. Which is happiness, freedom, status. You know, it's never like the purse. It's like the purse, but the people see it. Now you feel like you're more important.

1:03:00Sal Di Stefano:Well, remember that's, I remember I've shared with you before on the podcast, the exercise that I do with myself before I make a purchase. There's like boundaries. Yeah, you wait like 24 hours before I won't make it. Then the next question is, is this something that I feel like I got to show to everybody else? Or is this something for me? Right. So there's a lot of layers because of that reason. because I know that I can be advertised market to impulsive about something. And just simply creating those boundaries makes me really think about that. But I mean, like using the house example is like, man, I feel like it's, it's also a gift too.

1:03:33Sal Di Stefano:So it's like this, it's a gift, it's experience and it's a materialistic thing. It's all, all three of those. It's like, and nobody in my family and our family has the ability to have a house like that, that can host and do all that. So it's almost like every time they all get together.

1:03:48Adam Schafer:That's a great point. imagine having your big place and not being around any family right how empty would that totally

1:03:54Sal Di Stefano:yeah totally and so and and and by the way i i learned this lesson so i mean i know the last podcast we were teasing me about my bath this is like me my house is not that big i had a much bigger i've had a much bigger uh arguably fancier place with views and everything to live but we were just far enough away from family nobody came over and i remember katrina and i being like Like, what is this for? We've got this cool place, you know, and maybe on Instagram, it would look cool to show people. But it's like, if I'm not using it to enjoy family, do that, then it defeats the purpose. And so being where we're at in a smaller place that's filled with love and people.

1:04:36Sal Di Stefano:And to know that every time I do that, it's like I get to give a gift again. And I get to experience something again. So to me, there's a fine line because I feel like there can be very extreme people on both ends. It can be this, I'm all material and status direction you're going. And then there can be the like, nothing matters. I find it interesting.

1:04:58Adam Schafer:If you look at, I mean, you're right, 100%. But I think more people struggle with the first part. Maybe they don't realize it, but if they really did an analysis, it's like, man, do I need all this stuff? And what do I think I'm going to get from getting these things? And what happens is like, it's a feedback loop. It's like, I got this thing. I got the little spike of happiness. It's gone. It's not happening again. Let me try getting something else. By the way, the data shows on the other side too, when people give to help others, they are, then they start to do it more because they start to feel it and realize it.

1:05:31Adam Schafer:And so it kind of becomes this positive feedback loop. So I mean, it's really, I think it's fascinating. It's interesting because I don't think a lot of people realize that, but if you really think about it, you're like, what do I want with this? like i got my stuff taken care of what do i want with this extra money what do i really want i just want to be happy i feel secure already i got my savings we're good yeah what do i want from i want to be happy okay let me see let me try it in this way yeah do you do you ever challenge yourself

1:05:56Sal Di Stefano:because do you or do you ever think of yourself on on one side or that extreme or the other and challenge yourself to go outside that a little bit because i'll be the first to admit that the first 30 years, I was probably somebody who leaned on that. I had to learn that lesson and maybe a little bit before 30, because I was doing things like the stuff that you know that I've done before for families and things like that. And I got to feel that. And that was a big, which by the way, I think for anybody, that's such a great exercise. Like if you've never done something like that, regardless of what level you are, you don't have to be at a super level.

1:06:31Sal Di Stefano:In fact, I would argue, because even when I did that way back when, I wasn't in a major financial status to where I had lots of extra money to go give. I think it felt really good knowing that I didn't and actually still did that. And being able to draw back on that memory of doing something for families like that and go like, wow, I could still think about that and get that spike a decade and a half, two decades later or whatever. So I think that helps pull that back in a little bit. And then just becoming aware of as you stack up some of those material things. I think my sneakers are a good example.

1:07:01Sal Di Stefano:I'm very aware of the ridiculousness of that. right like and it doesn't give it there is no nobody else is getting enjoyment there's no real experiences other than being on my damn feet that you know i'm saying like you should give them away i have i've given a lot of oh yeah a lot of my shoes i've given away a ton of my shoes i've given away uh so um yeah so i but i do think there's also yeah that i mean do you ever challenge

1:07:24Adam Schafer:yourself like you know i would i mean i have uh boy i have challenges in a lot of different areas I thank God that this one is, for me, for whatever reason, it's never been an issue. It's never been like a challenge. Maybe because I grew up feeling secure in this way. It was never a big deal with my family, I think. So when it comes to money in that way, I've never felt challenges there. Thank God I have challenges in a lot of areas where I really struggle. But that's one where I thank God every day. like okay this is not one that i this is a problem because i could see that one being a hard one especially if you become successful i could see that being a real um challenge for some people or not being successful i think that would be even harder yeah yeah imagine being challenged that way and also uh feeling like well i think that's where a lot of people land i think a lot of people land

1:08:16Sal Di Stefano:in that place of like constantly chasing this well look at the debt people have

1:08:22Adam Schafer:with like just buying cars yeah like the average car payment insane it's crazy and most people have it shouldn't even own that car but what are they doing it for i think there's they bought this

1:08:32Sal Di Stefano:kind of idea yeah did you see i shared with you i think you guys are chris nagibi's like on like the credit card deck it's unbelievable what uh we're in right now with like and the the ability now to defer like food and defer like your rent like that's crazy that's crazy yeah it's wild

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1:09:36Adam Schafer:Back to the show. Our first caller is Benjamin from Switzerland. Hey, Benjamin. How you doing, man? Hey, how are you guys? Good. Good. How can we help you? So a bit of context here. It's a two-part question, but a few years ago, basically, I lost a substantial amount of weight. And so it was a great benefit for my life, but I eventually pushed things way too far with training volume, running, intensity, and especially the whole calorie tracking aspect of things, which basically saw my hormones, energy, and just a lot of blood markers kind of just completely tank. and so for the last few years it's really been more of like a uphill battle in a way of trying to rebuild my body uh my relationship with it uh but also just managing overall stress better especially with i'm kind of leading two to three careers at the same time so that's definitely a challenge um i've run quite a few of your programs over the past couple years uh right now i'm doing performance again not too sure if i should stick with it but uh it seemed like a decent fit and so my goals right now basically are to try and put on some muscle again because i feel like i've been spinning my wheels um but without overdoing the volume uh i've been very into mobility and like handstand trainings also and recently did pick running back up which i know sounds counterintuitive but I've really focused more on just the joy of it, uh, without tracking metrics too much.

1:11:17And I've been loving it so far. So yeah, more than anything, I think to be honest, it's more about getting back to feeling like the little ball of energy I used to be known for being, I guess.

1:11:31Adam Schafer:Yeah. So yeah. Good question. So, um, in your email, it says you lost over a hundred pounds. yeah in the space of around two years i lost uh around 135 pounds great job oh yeah you look great great job man yeah and um and so now the main goal is i just want to feel better and have more energy yeah i think obviously the muscle and all that like that's something that will come with time but it really is just like you said the daily energy just feeling good um and whether that's also with my relationship with uh food exercise and it's gone so much already but obviously it's always a work in progress and then you said you have about three careers going on right now can you explain that a little bit so um basically i'm a professional musician i'm a cellist.

1:12:25So I'm a performing soloist after having done my post-grad in that. But at the same time, I'm working in my family business, which is a dermatology, but also longevity clinic now. So I'm working in that aspect of things and studying to become a health coach at the same time to kind of mend the two together.

1:12:48Adam Schafer:Okay. So this is a lot of work. yeah yeah long days okay okay uh so losing that much weight is a is profoundly transformational but also it's a big deal on the body um you lost the whole human um off your body and what it takes to get there is not where you want to stay to maintain and you're probably feeling the low energy because you're just doing too much. And you want to go through a period of rejuvenation and rebuilding. And you're going to need to go through this period for probably a year or two before you start to ramp things up and chase different goals. So you're going to have to go through a period of rest, essentially.

1:13:34Adam Schafer:Now, that doesn't mean you don't exercise, but everything that you do is kind of moving in that direction or centered towards that or aiming towards that and what you'll notice from that is more energy so less is more uh with this uh process um you know maps 15 would be your strength training protocol yeah um if you really really love running uh i guess it's okay uh but i if you want the energy i would walk and just focus on

1:14:03Sal Di Stefano:steps i would just make sure you're fueled if you're gonna do that running like where i mean You don't want to be running and really low-calorie, too. That would be a really bad recipe. Running with the proper amount of nutrients and calories for the enjoyment of it, I could see okay. But if I was training you, I'd want to know where we're at calorie-wise before I let you go run and do that. I mean, kind of where Sal's going and where my brain goes with where you're at in your life. You did such an incredible job getting down to where you are. You're in a much healthier, fitter place. your workouts should try your your workouts actually shouldn't be your focus your focus should be kind of the career your passions staying healthy and so you should train to to be that person you've you've done such a good job getting here and then all the other things the energy hormone stuff all that stuff will balance itself out because you work out to support your lifestyle what you're doing not to get to a certain place you're at a place in your life where you have a lot of stuff going on you've already accomplished the big the big rock which was getting all that weight off your body and putting yourself in a healthy weight now now what like your workout optimization looks like is is really doing the the least amount to elicit the most change which is just a minimal dose that keeps you strong uh get you good rest keeps you mobile um but not trying to stretch yourself and like hit these goals and trying to gain a bunch of muscle or get really good at bjj or it's like that that's what's going to optimize you uh for longevity and benjamin that doesn't mean you're always going to be there right right okay because it's a period of your time this

1:15:42Adam Schafer:is a season so to put it differently you went through a radical physical um and psychological transformation losing all that weight and so now your body needs to go through a period of rest That was a radical change. So like when I work with a woman who gets pregnant and has a baby, they're always like, how quickly can I get back in shape? How fast can I get back to how I was like, well, hold on. We just went through a radical change. Now, that doesn't mean you don't progress afterwards, but it's going to take a couple years before you start to feel like, oh, like I'm back to my old self because that radical change.

1:16:19Adam Schafer:Your change was massive. 135 pound weight loss physically is a big deal, but it's also psychologically a big deal. Like your mind had to change quite a bit to go from where you were to where you're at now. So now you got to go through a period of rest and recuperation, which is probably going to look like a year or two.

1:16:41Sal Di Stefano:Which also, by the way, though, is the fastest path to you feeling better. You white knuckling it and trying to work your way back to a healthier version of yourself is not going to work. No. So this is not like one of those things. It's like, can I do this? And can I do that? Can I do this to get to me to feel this way? Honestly, the less you do in this situation and focus just on healthy rest, recovery, doing as little as possible to build some strength. And that's what it looks like. So this is not one of those things of what are all the things I can do to get there faster? the fastest path actually looks like the kind of laying off like what sal's alluding to right now that is the fastest path and i think you'll i think you'll see positive changes oh yeah relatively quick uh before i think he's setting the table so you have to set your expectations right that this could take a year or so to get back to feeling like the best version of you but you could you could start to feel that right away and a lot sooner but it's not through doing more yeah the

1:17:43Adam Schafer:The reason why I'm saying a year or two is because you are going to feel better quickly and you might be fooled into thinking, now I can ramp things back up. Because if you started following MAPS 15 right now and you did no additional strength training, no additional workouts, and all you did was MAPS 15 and walk, okay? No exercise, no running, no calisthenics.

1:18:06Sal Di Stefano:No BJJ.

1:18:07Adam Schafer:No, nothing. Just walk every day, make sure I get 8 ,000 to 10 ,000 steps, and then my lifting looks like MAPS 15, which is like two lifts a day. Your energy be through the roof. Within a month, you're going to notice an increase in energy and you're going to feel good. And then you're going to be fooled into thinking, okay, now I can ramp it back up. Yeah, yeah. What I'm saying to you is you got to have a year of that, a year of feeling good, a year of that rest before you start to ramp things up. Maybe even two years because 135 pounds is not nothing. Most people don't even get close to that weight loss.

1:18:38Adam Schafer:You literally lost an entire human. so so that's the direction you want to go and the reason why you feel like you're doing these things but your energy isn't good is uh because it's time now to let your body settle after all that massive uh shift uh because if you keep pushing which by the way pushing isn't going to look like a lot so because you may judge it you may think well this is not that much i know people who work out like that yeah but they didn't lose 135 pounds so give yourself like a year or two of sitting in that rest and then i promise you it's going to be like oh man i can start ramping things up and you'll be a brand new person yeah it's it's funny because like i obviously and it's what we always say like i know deep down that that's exactly what i would tell others and it's always harder and it's always way yeah we we never follow our own advice.

1:19:34And that's why already I've now, it's been what, maybe eight months maybe or so that I decided to put BJJ on the side. And that was tough. Like I really fell in love with it. And it also, it was one of my outlets in the beginning to kind of shift my focus away from all the calorie tracking and all that. And it gave me this kind of focus that, I mean, you've talked about it, of like just performance and that kind of aspect. But I realized that it's still not the right moment. And I'll pick it back up, I'm sure, later on. But that was kind of, I know that was rough for me. But if I'm honest with myself, like I know that over the past four years since I lost that weight, like I've hovered around the same five kilos, which is maybe like 10 pounds of like trying these like kind of bulks.

1:20:29but then stopping a bit shy because I felt uncomfortable with it. Also, from my perspective, a side of it is always hard to judge in terms of, I know I like this, obviously some loose skin and stuff like that. So judging like also where I'm at body was like, like body fat percent and all that is objectively deceiving. And that often is a barrier in itself to, you know, just trust the process. And I've really worked since like September or so to just stay on. I set this goal of whatever happens, like I'm not going to do anything too drastic in terms of trying to even approaching the holidays. It's the first time I didn't approach it with a cut or anything.

1:21:13So like I've done huge improvements in terms of that. But it's always, yeah, it's it's something I know like it will take time. I'm just trying to navigate kind of this, how do I, yeah, the working out in terms of.

1:21:32Adam Schafer:Benjamin. I know you don't need much. Let me encourage you. Let me encourage you, okay? What you did to lose 135 pounds is a lot harder than what you need to do right now. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, you're being really hard on yourself. Number two, I've never seen somebody lose over 100 pounds and look as good as you do. Yeah. I've never. Yeah. You sent some pictures. You're muscular, dude. And yeah, you talk about loose skin. Like you look like your body bounced better than I've ever seen. Yeah. And I've worked with a lot of people who've had some pretty radical transformations through bariatric surgeries and the like.

1:22:05Adam Schafer:So you're doing great. Here's the deal. Okay. You're afraid of going back to where you were before. And I get that. Here's how you should approach your nutrition. Stop tracking. Eat until you're satisfied. Eat whole foods. Hit your protein. That's it. That's it. Don't weigh yourself because that's going to mess you up. And try not to study yourself in the mirror or take pictures of yourself too much with your shirt off. And don't try and bulk or cut.

1:22:34Sal Di Stefano:Feed the body when it's hungry. It's a beautiful thing when you're getting healthy and you're strength training with like a MAPS 15. It will tell you when it needs more calories to build that muscle. And it'll tell you when you're satisfied and fine. It's a beautiful thing.

1:22:47Adam Schafer:So long as it's whole natural foods, you can trust your satiety signals much more. So you just eat whole natural foods, hit your protein targets, which is your body weight and protein at that first, follow mass 15 and just walk lifts a day. You're good. That's it, dude. And it, yeah, it's going to be hard, but it's, I'm telling you right now, it is what you went through to get here way harder, dude. Yeah. You're being really, I think you're just got some fear, uh, because you're maybe afraid of going back to where you were before or whatever, but I don't think that's going to happen. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

1:23:16And like, I think, uh, it's kind of part two of the question, if that's all right. Like, I think you hit a right note about the fears that, like, I'm very aware of it. But there's, in a sense, also a bit of imposter syndrome, I think. Because a big thing for me right now, like, a massive goal and, like, driving purpose in my life, which I've always had from playing the cheddar, you know, performing for people. It's I want to help people and like serve. And in this case, I basically want to help them avoid the mistakes that I made along the way. And so like I know that everyone goes through the struggles, but there's that aspect of.

1:24:01I'm still struggling with certain things and I'm very honest about it. I have no issue talking about it, but managing that kind of reality of things while also being able to help others in their life journeys and transformations.

1:24:18Sal Di Stefano:Lean into it. Lean into it, Benjamin. That'll make you better. Lean into it. You've been listening to the show for a long time, yeah? I knew you were going to say that. Of course, I'm going to say that. I could have quoted you, I think. Because if you've listened for a long time, you know, that's what makes this show is that we're not afraid to share our struggles, the things today still today you know what we go through and our mishaps and what we learned and how silly and stupid we were before and how we keep making mistakes people connect with that and people will resonate with that and they'll they'll respect that so lean into that lean into where you're at in your journey where you get imposter syndrome is when you try and pretend you're something you're not and and people will appreciate the vulnerability and appreciate what you've accomplished already is amazing and can help so many people from, from your story.

1:25:09Sal Di Stefano:Don't try and pretend like you have all the answers and you've figured it all out. Let them know you'll be an imposter. That's right. Then you'll feel imposter syndrome, be who you are and where you're at and open with what you're still trying to figure out. And that is what will resonate with the people that you're helping. And you'll help way more people that way. And you'll be far more successful if you come from that place. Yeah. Yeah. And I started sharing actually some social media content, like focused around cooking because I love cooking uh and giving like kind of healthier tips around that like meal prep uh like you often like I may have used you a couple times in terms of cooking batch meats at the dinner before um but yeah trying to like because it's been a way to reclaim kind of power over food like the way that it controlled me and I'm trying to funnel that also um but yeah uh i i know i'm stepping in the right direction it's more just kind of being able to strip things down and get a clear view yeah i have no i have a lot of confidence

1:26:14Adam Schafer:that you're gonna do great you're doing good bro yeah i think the discomfort you feel is because you're such a fast grower it sounds like it sounds like you're pretty rapid with personal growth when you kind of decide to go in a direction and that's always uncomfortable but you're going great, bro. You're doing really, really well. Give yourself a good year of rest. So that's how you approach your exercise. A good year of rest around food, which means you're not watching every bite. You're just eating when you feel hungry, sticking to whole natural foods, hit your protein first. Those are your guardrails.

1:26:48Adam Schafer:I think it's great if you help other people. I think that's one of the things that saved me from going too crazy was that I helped other people um and be honest and be just totally honest make you a better coach better trainer that's it that's it yeah you're doing great dude yeah and i just wanted to say uh yeah thanks for all the stories also that you guys share i know recently adam everything you've been talking about like it just like what i want to be able to provide to others like it really does help give a lot of a more human like approach to this um so i think it's yeah it's amazing what you guys have been doing awesome thank you you're gonna do great brother do you have maps 15 do you have any of those programs i'll send so actually i do have uh 15 but i was wondering if maybe to make justin happy also uh do you reckon maps 15 performance could be something to look at yeah absolutely i'll send it to you they're both great you love them thank so much yep you got it dude good all right buddy and if i can ask uh one last little suggestion yeah uh you guys should consider doing uh some sort of like maps in a or maps in a circle program with jordan say at once great dude i'm sure that's something a lot of people would love

1:28:06Sal Di Stefano:yeah awesome we love jordan yeah he's great man he's great all right benjamin take it easy brother Keep it up. All right.

1:28:15Adam Schafer:By the way, the way he looks after losing 135 pounds is like best. I know. It's crazy. 135 pounds is huge. Yeah, it's massive. You got to go through. Look, you go through a drastic, dramatic. First of all, losing 30 pounds of body fat is a big change mentally, physically. 135 pounds? Yeah, you're going to need a year to just sit in it and just let your body rest. Just recover, recuperate.

1:28:42Sal Di Stefano:You were chasing for that whole time. It's really good that we had a discussion around that because I know what you mean when you say that. But I think a lot of people hear that and they think,

1:28:51Adam Schafer:a year?

1:28:51Sal Di Stefano:Yeah. I got to wait a year to see results. To feel good. Yeah, to feel good. Yeah, yeah. You know, I just think that it's, or just think it's going to be that long until they feel good at all. It's like, no, you'll feel better and better every week. And then it was - But you got to just wait a year. It was crazy. And you're right. What happens to people is they start off the right path. by taking the advice and then a month or two later they're like oh i feel great and then they start to ramp it up and they go right back and so that's really the advice is that listen you're going to be you're going to be feeling really good pretty quick you know a couple couple months of taking that advice walking and eating like that and and training mass 15 yeah you'll be humming 30 60 days he's going to be feeling really good uh what the what he doesn't know is that his body's not really good yet and it needs to stay in that place for a year and that's going to be the the hard part is the temptation to want to ramp up and do more.

1:29:43Sal Di Stefano:Our next caller is John from Kentucky. What's up, John? How you doing, John? How you doing, guys?

1:29:48Adam Schafer:Good. Good. How can we help you, man? Well, I'll just start with the emails. Most people do. I said, hello, guys. First of all, I want to thank you for the information that you guys put out and the way you put it out there. So many people like to make things sound so complicated, and I really appreciate the simple way you guys put it out so us common folk can understand it uh backstory time i'm 47 years old six foot four 322 pounds down from 380 at my heaviest uh it's been several years to get there uh yo-yo back and forth on and off uh so type two diabetic i am on uh moncharo uh more for the diabetes and the weight loss, but my doctor keeps pushing me to try to get my dose up.

1:30:34I'm currently on 7.5 milligrams weekly. It's the auto injector, all or nothing. I do have low testosterone. I was sub 100 when we found out about it. They put me on 200 milligrams every other week. Levels come up to about 404 average. So I've talked to my doctor into putting me on 200 milligrams weekly and after listening to um your uh mp hormones podcast the other day i've decided to start even breaking that up and doing the monday thursday like uh like he had suggested on that video so doing the 100 on monday 100 on thursday just started that this week so i can't really tell you how well it's working for me but hopefully it it works a lot better than what this has been.

1:31:21I am a stage three rectal cancer survivor, uh, with a stage one reoccurrence almost two years later. Uh, luckily, um, you know, uh, they were able to catch that reoccurrence super, super early. So it allowed for a surgical procedure that didn't leave me with any kind of a permanent, uh, uh, colostomies or stuff like that. So, um, definitely thank God for that one because I was struggling with that one. So I'm an athlete trainer at a local high school here where I live. Job's not always physically demanding, but there's lots of standing, lots of moving. And I've always been the fat guy, always been the fat kid, and started to stop more times than I can count.

1:32:09Kind of tired of it, time to make a change. Sorry I waited so long in life to do it, but I got to do it. So looking around on Spotify for podcasts on fitness over 40, and I found your episode about the best workout diet and supplement routine for men over 40. I wrote everything down, started doing everything to the letter. As with most knuckleheads, I decided to add a third day to it instead of doing the two days. And it's what it is, right? More is better, right? So after 10 weeks of that, which we're at 12 weeks now, I'm making good progress. At least I was. Ended up with a pinched nerve in my neck.

1:32:48My doctor, that's my medical director here, confirmed that yesterday. Put me on some high-dose steroids and some muscle relaxers. Doing a little bit of PT with a buddy of mine to kind of hope to get that lined out pretty quick, as quick as I can, and get back into doing everything. My nutrition isn't perfect. I work some crazy hours. I do the best I can. I was trying to eat whole foods. Doesn't always work. Sometimes Subway is the best I could do that day or, you know, unfortunately pizza. So I'm averaging about 2 ,600 calories a day, 160 grams of protein, 236 grams of carbs, 121 grams of fat.

1:33:31So I was losing with the pinched nerve. I was losing some, actually a lot of strength in my left arm as far as the triceps go, having pain and muscle spasms in that tricep. But I didn't know if I was overtraining or if it was the pinched nerve. I'm going to find out it's the pinched nerve. I'm probably overtraining a little bit too with not enough calories would be my guess. But elbow kind of kicks out, gives out when I'm trying to do any kind of chest or tricep exercise. So I started to go backwards on that. Really kind of hit me a little bit. I was doing so good that that back squat kind of hurt me there a little bit.

1:34:11But I just, I want to know your guys' opinion on what I need to do now. I mean, obviously, after I get this pinched nerve under control, where do I need to go from here?

1:34:21Adam Schafer:Yeah, you're doing pretty well. I mean, the black and white answers, and by the way, in your email, you said they wanted to up your dose of Manjaro. Yes, yeah. My doctor keeps trying to get me to push that up, and I keep fighting her. As a matter of fact, I've got an appointment next week, and I'm going to tell her I want to drop back down. I want to drop down to the five milligram to get up. It causes so much GI problems with me. It really hits me hard. When I take it at the beginning of the week for the first two or three days, it's miserable. Then it kind of gets better, but then it's time to take it again.

1:34:56I'm just tired of the GI problems with it.

1:35:00Adam Schafer:Is it constipation, diarrhea? Is it acid reflux, all of the above? It's diarrhea. it's um uh just nausea that kind of stuff okay i will i will tell you too though just so you know

1:35:12Sal Di Stefano:the most likely at least in my experience the um subway sandwiches and the pizza will exacerbate that for sure too just so you know like yes it definitely does not do uh well on foods that your body doesn't digest easy it definitely makes all those things really really difficult so my clients that have struggled with this, helping them connect those dots that, hey, it's like when you're taking that stuff, it's even more important to eat super clean. And if you don't, you're going to end up paying for it.

1:35:43Adam Schafer:You could try psyllium husk fiber. And you take that with each meal. And oftentimes it makes a difference. Okay. Yeah, with the GI stuff. Okay, so I mean, here's the thing. You want to be consistent with nutrition. Yes. Okay, and maintain that. And then as far as workout is concerned, and I can send you one of ours so you have something to follow. But, you know, also just taking a step back, John, you said this is something you've been just cycling, that's a challenge you've been dealing with since you were a kid? Yes. Okay. Your best bet is, I don't know if it's feasible for you, but working with a coach is going to be your best bet because it's going to be a bit of a process.

1:36:21Adam Schafer:Yes. So, you know, we have really good coaches. You would work with them. And what they would do is they would take you through step by step. So they'd start you off with nutrition. They'd look at what you're doing. We'll start tracking. make adjustments as we go along they'll also make adjustments to your workout programming where you could send you know videos of your technique in your form and then just continue to coach you along the way uh because it is going to be a bit of a journey i will say i think you're doing a great job yeah you got the hormones down uh looks like you've already lost uh like 60 pounds or something like that which is really good you're moving in the right direction for sure uh which would make you a really good candidate for now taking the step and working with a coach and I think six months of coaching would be uh super transformational uh for a guy like you I think it would be very very very transformational also really good timing with

1:37:10Sal Di Stefano:you getting the TRT up because 400 is still low now you're gonna you're gonna end up being higher than that now which is gonna be so nice and that's and and if you do hit those macros if we can hit those those are good macros uh you're you're the numbers you gave if we can be consistent with that trt levels up following good programming real good consistent program yeah you you should uh you should start doing really well so now that doesn't mean we won't have tough weeks and backslides but that's what the coaching and what sal's talking about is in those moments in those times that the coach who's just like all right this is what i want you to do from here probably the biggest mistake uh clients do when they're on their own with this is hard swings one way or either doing really, really good or you have really shitty, bad eating and bad, bad couple of days or what like that.

1:37:57Sal Di Stefano:And, and sometimes that's, uh, over committing yourself to too much too soon at certain stages. So that, and this is what good coaching looks like is that, that consistent conversation where it's like, you know, as a coach, I can see, okay, there's a couple of things he's doing here that I don't want him doing, but I don't want to tell him to stop all that stuff. I'm going to have him just focus on this one thing. Right. And let's get better at that. And that's what it looks like is just attacking one thing that's going to make improvement and then another thing that's going to make improvement.

1:38:24Adam Schafer:And you let the coach determine that.

1:38:25Sal Di Stefano:Yeah, and the coach determines that for you to help you stack these wins so it doesn't feel like this pendulum swinging back and forth really hard.

1:38:33Adam Schafer:Just so you know, the hard swings, part of the reason why it's a hard swing to the good side is because you feel like crap about what just happened. I just fell off. I just ate a whole pizza, whatever. Then you swing real hard in one direction. and then you hate it and then you swing hard uh in the other direction and so yeah here's several times i've let you know several times i've let you know a bad day or two bad days or something just kind of kind of sabotage that and i'm like well crap and then yep you know here we go but uh and you know what here's the deal too like uh feeling crappy about yourself in that way only makes it all worse and this sounds logical by the way it's you know you probably understand this up here, but, but, you know, getting through the process and feeling it, you know, in here, uh, makes a big difference.

1:39:20Adam Schafer:So I'll give you this advice right here. You're the coach will be very effective. The more honest you are and the more you turn to them. Okay. So what you don't want to do is keep from them the little mess ups, keep from them the challenge. Keep, they tell you, you're like, look, I don't want to do that. Be honest with them. Uh, that'll allow them to coach you in a very effective way. And I think in six months you'll be... Huge difference. Huge difference. You'll have some, definitely some physical changes for sure, but just the mental place you're going to be in very different in six months. And it'll be, your odds of success, consistent success will go through the roof.

1:39:56Adam Schafer:So that's essentially what you'd be looking at. Okay. You want somebody to call you? Yeah, definitely. Yeah, I'll talk to somebody. Alright, I'm going to have someone call you, John. Okay. And I'll let them know what we talked about and then i hope to see you in there dude yeah all right sounds great all right brother you're good man yeah appreciate you guys thanks i just want people to know too like listening like uh it's it's very easy for us experienced you know fitness guys to tell them the right answers of course that's that's not hard that's easy the hard part is like okay now we got to do it and we got to do it consistently and then oh you messed up what do we do now and you know you're looking at you know for a guy like this with what he's gone through you know between six months to a year of that real transformation where then it's like you know what i can do this i got this i can

1:40:47Sal Di Stefano:do this on my own well and i'm so glad you said what you said with uh the last piece of advice of being honest with your coach because a lot of the success or the failure of this is it hinges on that that's right if he's really transparent and like man that was really hard to do those things or i really like that or i you know i screwed up and i did this thing a good coach will be able to see that and go they can only work with what you tell them yeah and then then i know it's like okay i gave him a little too much you can anticipate i did a little too much too soon let me just have him do this and and then we start stacking wins and then i can add another thing and so and then and getting that and that's a six month to a year type of journey what happens

1:41:27Adam Schafer:sometimes oftentimes i would say uh is the person does well in the beginning then they start messing up, they hide it from the trainer or they tell them and then they get sick of telling them that they messed up a bunch of times so they hide it and then they stop seeing the coach. But it's not because they don't like the coach. It's because they're like, I just don't want to deal with this. I don't want to be that failure or whatever. So you just got to keep turning to them. They'll be way more effective if you do that. Our next caller is Rebecca from Florida. Hi, Rebecca. Hi, Rebecca. Hello. I'm a huge fan.

1:41:58Adam Schafer:So excited to be here. Thanks for calling in. How can we help you? So my husband and I are starting our first cut. We've been on a bulk. So we both like, to give you a little background, I started weight training about a year ago. Got in a big accident, had to kind of change up my routine. So started weight training for the first time, fell in love with it, started doing a bulk to build up my muscles. So I've been doing reverse diets. We listen to your advice all the time, kind of working out every day. four, five to six times a week. Now we want to start a cut and wanted your nutrition advice, workout advice.

1:42:37We're thinking about changing our workout routine to about three days a week, our training and kind of doing more full body. We did the push, pull legs, and then a variety of other exercises. So want some advice on that and some advice on nutrition.

1:42:52Adam Schafer:All right, Rebecca, first off, I'm going to ask you why you want to do a cut. You look amazing from here. Yeah, you look like you're at low 20s body fat. What do you want to try to get to? Well, I've gained about 10 pounds. I'm about a 22 % body fat, but I've gained about 10 pounds. So I'm feeling like, what do I do next? I don't want to keep gaining, but I want to make sure that I like - Where are your calories at right now? So I don't track that.

1:43:18Sal Di Stefano:Okay. I feel like I've been super hungry since I started. That's such a good - That's you getting - I eat a lot. Like, you know, we try to keep up our protein goals, but we don't track macros or calories.

1:43:30Adam Schafer:So, Rebecca, what's your husband's body fat percentage at? Did he test this? He is now at 21. So he went from 175. He went up another 10%. And then the also question is, we love working out together. We're really busy. We have three kids. This is our time together. Can we be doing the same or should we be doing the same workout? Your workout's fine. But, okay, so here's what I'm going to tell you. I don't think you should go on a cut. He could go on a cut. He could go on a cut. Yeah. Yeah. Your body fat percentage is low 20s. You're 22%. I can see that you got some muscle. That's a healthy range.

1:44:02Adam Schafer:You're 50. If you go on a cut, you're not going to like the way it feels at all. In fact, the better way for you to get leaner is to keep building muscle.

1:44:10Sal Di Stefano:Especially if you're getting the signal that you're still hungry. Feed.

1:44:13Adam Schafer:You'll actually get leaner easier. Yeah. You'll get leaner easier if you just focus on building. Yes. For you.

1:44:19Sal Di Stefano:Yes.

1:44:20Adam Schafer:If you start to cut, what'll probably happen is you lose some muscle, hormones are going to go not that good, and you're not going to be very happy. So I would have you continue on the reverse, and you can slow it down if you want, and just try to keep building muscle. I don't know where your husband's calories are at, so unless they're low, then that would be different. But if he's at 21. They're not low. We both try to eat. I mean, we have three kids, teenage kids. We have big dinners, but we have a lot of protein. We eat a lot of meat.

1:44:46Sal Di Stefano:Okay, good, good, good. he is so what about the fitness of what about the um training routine so we've been doing like five days we're thinking about doing now cutting it to three days full body i love that anabolic maps and a ball some like cardio on on the off days like on two days love that love that that's perfect love that maps and maps anabolic with the cardio on the off days yep yep two days a week Justin actually bought me muscle mommy maps.

1:45:17Adam Schafer:Yeah. 15, but I can't figure out how to get it into the routine that I'm doing. Why don't I just send you the original muscle mommy? Yeah, probably be better fit. Yeah. The original. Since you're working out a few days a week. In the trigger sessions, you do your cardio. Yeah, that's it. I'll send you that program. You follow that. And your husband can follow along if he wants to change some of the exercises.

1:45:37Sal Di Stefano:No, give him maps and a baller. And you guys can both be working out at the same time, doing similar stuff. It's a different programming. But put him on anabolic. He can run a cut. You stay the same. So is there, okay, since you don't track. Should we track? I mean, well, I'm not going to, I never would force a client, because you're especially as great as you look, and you're doing such a good job. But I'd ask a little bit deeper questions about your, like if you were to tell me what's our bad thing, like if you're not eating perfect, what does it look like uh our bad thing is not food it's drinking so we're trying to stop drinking during the week okay so like wine with dinner and okay so okay so here's my advice to you if you want to see yourself lean out a little bit try and replace the alcohol calories with meals

1:46:25Adam Schafer:so instead of instead of drinking instead of 160 calories of the wine have a meal like a real small

1:46:32Sal Di Stefano:you're not having 160 calories nobody has 160 calories this guy yeah do you have what do you have one do you say do you have one two out one two ounce glass of one no no i'm sure you have i'm sure you have four or five hundred calories worth of wine which is normal when someone's having a nice night of drinking so that katrina and i enjoy that everyone but if you want to see your body change a little bit more without tracking doing that do your best to replace the alcohol with a good meal a good balanced meal with the way your metabolism going the way you're building muscle you will build more muscle you will lean out if you can do and listen i'm don't even tell you to do it forever just do it for me for a couple months and i'll show you what that that your body and guess what when you build the more by switching that for a little bit building the muscle your metabolism go up then you can get away with more of the alcohol later on and still keep a better body so that so if that's your thing uh it sounds like you're doing a lot of the other things right and i and i bet the extra protein uh that your body will need will fuel that building muscle that would be it that's all i would change that's enough you told me enough right there to go that little tweak for a couple months will not only lean you out you'll see yourself your waistline probably come in and you'll build muscle and you'll look amazing your husband could probably go a little bit on a cut on anabolic you guys

1:47:44Adam Schafer:will be awesome he could cut the alcohol and not replace it with he talked to Marcelo from your team I gave him got some nutrition advice he had a call with him who gave him some advice on like how to like look at food with using your hand and it was really helpful

1:47:56Sal Di Stefano:okay good there you go perfect portions yeah you guys that's it you're set yeah but Sal's right I would not put I wouldn't put you on a cut at all. No, it doesn't make any sense. Especially since you tell me, too, you have these crazy hungry. Your body's trying to build. It wants to build more muscle.

1:48:10Adam Schafer:You'll run the risk if you try to go on a cut of losing muscle and ending up with less muscle, same body fat or higher. That's what I don't want to do is lose, because I've worked really hard to gain muscle. No, no, no. Keep going in that direction.

1:48:20Sal Di Stefano:If you just replace the extra calories that are coming from alcohol with meals, with high-protein meals, you'll build muscle and you'll lean out. Do you guys recommend three meals a day? or like eating more frequently with in between personal preference yeah it depends it's personal preference but keep this in mind okay it's really hard for both men and women to hit their protein intake with like three or less meals it typically takes at least it is it's hard to get that many grams of protein uh unless you guys you're eating 10 ounces of meat every time you eat it's hard to get enough protein each time especially early on breakfast meals that's where most people have the hardest time so four meals totally normally looks like a good good spot you know with with balanced protein uh is is a good spot to be at um if you do less you just got to keep in mind the you got to really eat a big portion of meat to make up for that protein so and if you guys were to ever track anything that would be the thing i'd have you track first is just just see if you're hitting your your grams of protein uh every day consistently and i bet i bet if we were to just track that and watch that because you get some of these empty calories from alcohol, alcohol occasionally, if anything's low, it's protein.

1:49:34Sal Di Stefano:And I bet if you bump that up, you'll see more muscle come on and you'll lean out because those are just empty calories. They're not doing anything for you other than enjoyment, but I'm not going to tell you that forever. Cause I bet if you like that, I like that Katrina and I Katrina loves wine. I like having a nice glass of whiskey. I absolutely balance that in my life, but when I'm trying to make some changes that goes aside for a little bit give me a couple months of running it and making good choice and it makes a huge difference huge difference yeah and your fight the fitness routine changing it from the five days to the three days of weight plus the two days of yeah yeah you'll probably get stronger you're gonna

1:50:12Adam Schafer:get you're gonna get stronger and you're gonna build muscle it's gonna be great yeah yes you're gonna build i wanted to thank you guys so much you have helped us both both uh personally in our relationship by starting this together professionally. I run a small company that trains teachers and we've started like with hard behaviors with children and started introducing some of this wellness to them. And it has changed the way that they walk into their classrooms every day. So I listen to my mom all the time. And a lot of what you share, I try to share with the teachers I work with and it's been super helpful.

1:50:45So thank you guys. It's really been life changing.

1:50:48Sal Di Stefano:Thank you. You got it. Thank you so much. Keep it up. Yeah. Okay.

1:50:53Adam Schafer:Yeah, I got to say, I'm just going to just people listening. If you're a woman over the age of 40, you've been strength training, your body fat percentage is in the low 20s, don't go on a cut. Don't go on a cut. You're going to get negative effects from it almost always. Listen, I don't care.

1:51:10Sal Di Stefano:22 % is lean. I don't care what age you are as a female. This is what I experience with Corinne right now. our body fat percentage was too low that our our like before we started seeing the results it needed to be up to see that's right it's like the most put it back up and you've been saying this for a very long time most one there's always exceptions to the rules right but for the majority most women do better at 19 plus percent as far as the results you'll see and in and we've talked about that you you recently talked about this with uh just being mind blown about uh where i just came in at higher body fat percentage.

1:51:47Sal Di Stefano:A body with more muscle on it at higher body fat percentage looks way better than you think it does. It's just a skinnier body. So if she puts on five pounds of muscle, she'll look 3 % leaner.

1:51:59Adam Schafer:Even if her body fat percentage just stays the same. That's what I mean.

1:52:01Sal Di Stefano:Even if she stays the same, if she puts five pounds of muscle on, she'll look 3 % leaner. Oh, yeah. And be eating way more and healthier. And stronger and mobile. And that faster metabolism then gives her that flexibility then to have that glass of wine here and there and be okay. Our next caller is Angela from Indiana. Hi, Angela. Hi, Angela. Hello. Hi.

1:52:21Adam Schafer:How are you? Thanks for having me. You got it. How can we help you? Okay. I'm just going to read my email like most people do. Okay. It says, I'm a 47-year-old perimenopausal mother of three teenagers. I'm a recovering long-distance runner, OTF goer, Orange Theory Fitness, and Beachbody workout person. I work a full-time job and two part-time jobs. I have been working out consistently for the last 18 months, but really haven't noticed any changes in my body. I'm reaching my protein goals and sleeping seven to eight hours per night. I have done muscle mommy twice and anabolic once in addition to other non-mind pump workouts.

1:52:58I would love your help to actually see changes in my body. I also have recurrent tennis elbow in my right arm. This has caused me to avoid workouts for up to six weeks in the past, and then I get an injection and it gets better. and just any recommendations on how to prevent this in the future.

1:53:14Adam Schafer:Okay, cool. So when you're doing our programs, are you doing anything else on top of it, like cardio, like any other exercise? So for the most part, no, just walking. Try to get 8 ,000 to 10 ,000 steps in a day. On the days I do a workout, it's probably closer to like 7 ,000, 8 ,000 steps. But on the days that I don't have a workout, then I make a leisurely walk my workout for the day. Good. And then when you say for the most part, what do you mean? um i did try running again a little while back but i've stopped it since because i was just tired of not seeing changes but i've stopped that um probably about six weeks ago okay so you're just you're just you're just burning the candle at both ends with full-time two part-time you got three teenagers uh you also have a history of just getting after it seems like that's your your mo uh one of our one of our maps 15 programs would work better for you you would get better you would get much better results uh with something like that um do you have a feeling you were gonna say that yeah do you work out in a gym or do you work out at home right now i work out at home good oh good good i'm gonna send you you like muscle mommy type style i can i can send you math 15 muscle mommy yeah that'd be great i'll send that to you do that maintain the walking keep hitting the protein and getting good sleep and i think you're gonna start seeing some good some good progress

1:54:26Sal Di Stefano:and as far as the the perimenopausal thing uh are you doing anything on the hormone side are you got somebody checking in and watching that is that all good yes so i uh start well i have a gynecologist we started looking into it last year i've actually been on hormone replacement since

1:54:41Adam Schafer:about september okay oh it's perfect yes okay cool perfect yeah you're just you're just doing so much uh that you need your the dose of strength training needs to be less okay i do plan on cutting back my jobs at some point in time but i have twins in flight school and so my husband and i are trying to pay off their flight school loans for them so they don't have a lot of debt oh wow Wow. Very cool. No, no, no. The 15 program. So after MAPS 15 Muscle Mommy, if you feel good on it, which I think you will, then go to the next MAPS 15 program, MAPS 15 Symmetry or Power Lift or traditional MAPS 15.

1:55:12Adam Schafer:I think that protocol is going to give you great results.

1:55:14Sal Di Stefano:Are you tracking calories or anything right now? Do you have any idea where you're at? Right now, no. At the beginning of the year, maybe a couple times a year I do, I'm normally between like 19 and 2100. Yeah. Just really low for a lot of activity. you're doing is so that you're not too bad uh you're probably going to want to bump another 100 to 200 calories and then drop to that 15 and i bet your body responds better to that so for as much active if you're getting eight to ten thousand steps every day and you were training that much and the jobs and everything that's a lot um and so you were probably just your body's stalled here's the thing though when you come out of this be patient because some it takes a little bit of time for the body to kind of reset get healthy again and then it'll respond So what it looks like a lot of times you'll start to feel better right away as far as like rest and just energy and like mood, all those things will start to improve.

1:56:05Sal Di Stefano:And then what will start to happen slowly is strength. You'll start to see strength go in the gym. And then what comes after that is the body changing the results. So just be patient. It takes a minute for the body to kind of reorganize and say, oh, I'm being fed again. Oh, this feels good. Oh, here, let me reward you. You're getting stronger in the gym. And then comes the aesthetic results. So just be just, this is the path. This is what you need to do. Trust the process. And then, and, but it just know that just know that it takes a minute to, to, for it all to get going. Don't abandon it and go, oh my God, this is enough.

1:56:39Sal Di Stefano:I need to start doing more stuff. Cause then you'll just go right back to where you were. Yeah. That's kind of why I reached out. Cause like I said, I've been trying to do it for 18 months. Obviously getting older, my husband's actually very fit. He goes to the gym frequently. My, all, all my kids are sons. They all like run, they go to the gym. and they do all kinds of stuff. And so, you know, I just, I kind of want to, I want to look like I work out. I don't have to obviously be like a Beachbody competitor. I've had twins. My stomach is a disaster. I understand all that. I just want to, I want people to look at me and look like I take care of myself.

1:57:07Sal Di Stefano:Yeah. Have you considered joining our Muscle Mommy group? We have a group of women that's, and I'd say good half of them are menopausal, perimenopausal, going through very, very similar stuff. And it's incredible community and weekly coaching and help along the way. Yeah, I've thought about it. obviously trying to pay off my kid's student loan. We try to be mindful of how much we spend right now.

1:57:30Adam Schafer:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why don't I get you in there for a month for free? You could bounce after that, but just get some advice. Oh, that would be great. All right, we'll send that to you. Okay. And you're doing good. Yep. You're doing good, hon. Be kind to yourself. Well, I appreciate you all. I listen to you all on my walks, typically. Yeah, you're doing good. And I really do think that's just too much. So I think within a week or two, you should start to see strength gains. And that's when you know you're moving in the right direction. Yeah, I want to be strong as I age. Good, good, good. You will.

1:58:02Adam Schafer:You will. All right, so we're going to send you a MAPS 15 Muscle Mommy, and then we're going to get you in the Muscle mommy group for for 30 days for free so you get some advice thank you so much i appreciate it thank you you got it all right i do i think people need to realize just like uh how much all the life stuff affects your body's ability to adapt to exercise yeah yeah of course you gotta factor that in but it's hard because it just seems like that's your normal yeah right but that's stress

1:58:30Sal Di Stefano:that's right well and and and also in the context of age how low your calories are like that stuff it just hormones kids like pills yeah it's uh it's redlining your engine with no oil in it or gas it's like it's eventually going to shut down on you um and then that's frustrating because you're still stepping on the gas uh hoping to go somewhere and you're not going anywhere and and and then also then being patient when you start to do the right thing because the right thing it takes a minute for that body to reset and get back to where it needs to be to start to show you results and that what happens is most people hear that advice and it makes sense logically for them but then they don't see the change quick enough and then they bail on it and

1:59:15Adam Schafer:go back to old habits look if you like the show come find us on instagram mind pump media thank you for listening to mind pump if your goal is to build and shape your body dramatically improve your health and energy and maximize your overall performance, check out our discounted RGB Super Bundle at mindpumpmedia.com. The RGB Super Bundle includes MAPS Anabolic, MAPS Performance, and MAPS Aesthetic. Nine months of phased expert exercise programming designed by Sal, Adam, and Justin to systematically transform the way your body looks, feels, and performs. With detailed workout blueprints and over 200 videos, the RGB Super Bundle is like having Sal, Adam, and Justin as your own personal trainers, but at a fraction of the price.

2:00:00The RGB Super Bundle has a full 30-day money-back guarantee, and you can get it now plus other valuable free resources at mindpumpmedia.com. if you enjoy this show please share the love by leaving us a five-star rating and review on itunes and by introducing mind pump to your friends and family we thank you for your support and until next time this is mind pump