In short
A bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me where Vogue Williams, Joanne McNally, and guest listener Q&A discuss ADHD-related mishaps, media/clickbait about celebrity relationships and working moms, “faux feminism,” and a listener’s sexual-orientation confusion. Guest/Caller background: A gay man from rural Ireland raised in a very Catholic family; he came out at 18, faced depression and long-term shame, has a boyfriend now, and has never been with a woman.
Key claims
He’s suddenly having intense urges and vivid sex dreams about women (including oral sex), feels guilt/“cheating” thoughts, and wonders if it’s curiosity or Catholic guilt.
Notable examples
Dreams about going down on Gemma Collins; discussion that sexuality can be fluid and “no boxes anymore,” plus advice to wait and see if urges persist before acting.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOSetting the Scene
0:45 to 2:45
The hosts humorously discuss Joanne's forgetfulness and recent night out.
“Nothing is my fault anymore I'm disabled in the mind It's official I can't even be blamed for this It's just part of my condition Jo Okay In which case I apologise I apologise to you Thank you.”
ADHD and Relationships
2:45 to 6:40
Joanne shares her experience with ADHD and how it affects her daily life.
“I'm due to go to Paris with a friend in December And she has a good book Who?”
Questioning Sexuality
6:40 to 11:20
The hosts discuss a listener's dilemma about questioning their sexuality.
“because you're a mother suddenly you can't talk you know me and you bro we always have these conversations about what's acceptable, what's not.”
Exploring Sexual Curiosity
11:20 to 14:01
Discussion on feelings of guilt and curiosity regarding sexual attraction.
“Because I think that we're dickheads and she's like I think you're in a bad mood and then I could start listening to it again the next day.”
Bath Calls and Shower Echoes
14:01 to 14:32
A light-hearted discussion about calling friends from the bath and shower experiences.
“I ring people from the shower and they're like why is it echoey?”
Exploring Sexuality and Guilt
14:32 to 14:58
A listener shares feelings of guilt while wanting to explore their sexuality, prompting a deeper discussion.
“as I love my boyfriend so much, but I just feel there's a part of me that's urging to explore my sexuality once again.”
Navigating Curiosity and Relationships
14:58 to 15:40
The hosts discuss the normalcy of sexual curiosity within relationships and societal norms.
“Marcus, Marcus, I forgot about that day.”
Identities and Modern Life
15:40 to 16:51
Conversation shifts to the fluidity of sexual identities and the lack of societal labels today.
“And I think that you, like, I mean, it's difficult for you not to maybe give it a go.”
Humor and Honesty in Conversations
16:51 to 17:50
A humorous exchange about authenticity and experiences related to gender and sexuality.
“identifying as a straight husband with children who are absolutely riding lads on the side.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:01Vogue Williams:This is a Global Player original podcast.
0:10Vogue Williams:Hello and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, Vogue Williams, and with the most forgetful woman in all of the land, not just Ireland, England, maybe the whole world, Joanne McNally.
0:25Joanne McNally:And North America, I would say.
0:27Vogue Williams:Every continent, I would say.
0:28Joanne McNally:Yeah
0:29Vogue Williams:If there was So we are We really have to not talk over each other today Because Joanne has Not only no mic But also She thought today Do you know what Fuck it I'm not going to take headphones either So we've no mic and no headphones
0:42Joanne McNally:I've ADHD now I'm disabled Nothing is my fault anymore I'm disabled in the mind It's official I can't even be blamed for this It's just part of my condition Jo Okay In which case I apologise I apologise to you Thank you. You don't have your microphone. Thank you. And you two should be delighted. I'm here for diversity, frankly. Which we are.
1:06Vogue Williams:We are. But Joe, we're bullying. She's going to go to Global HR and say, those two are bullying me because of my condition.
1:14Joanne McNally:I'm fucked, mate. I'm sacked. I'm gone. The worst thing to happen to me was that psychiatrist giving me a diagnosis. I've never leaned on anything more.
1:22Vogue Williams:I think you've gotten worse since she started the meds. I think the meds are actually making her worse.
1:27Joanne McNally:well no because I don't take them out I take them oh yeah she loses the prescription yeah yeah yeah it's all that jazz I mean it's classic yes yes I've known Mike and know everyone but I'm here and that's the main thing okay
1:42Vogue Williams:we're surprised you're here to be honest with you I know you were on the absolute lash last night after your first show in Dublin
1:48Joanne McNally:I was and I'm in the Leinster hotel and we came back last night and there I don't know I lost count the tiny fancy martinis which is basically just pure biz Yeah
2:04Vogue Williams:I'll describe the scene here for you Joanne's like right up close to the camera she has last night's fake fun definitely hasn't put a brush through the hair yet No
2:14Joanne McNally:eyes are very red still got some of the sandwiches Also locked herself out of the hotel room just before the record that she was she was late because she'd lost her hotel key Yeah and why why did all those things happen to me? What do I have Joanne?
2:27Vogue Williams:That's a great saying for Joanne You're your own worst enemy Jo? Isn't it? Suits her perfectly Jo, what do I have?
2:33Joanne McNally:She just disconnected there for a bit Because the internet is also shit You have ADHD Joanne And it means it's not your fault Thank you Thank you Thank you Well, it's my fault I'm no longer accountable for anything I'm due to go to Paris with a friend in December And she has a good book Who? I said I can't book Ross forget it
2:56Vogue Williams:I haven't been told
2:57Joanne McNally:about this I pay DHT you know I can't be I can't book anything so it's all up to you pal yeah it's great I'm delighted it's an unusual choice
3:06Vogue Williams:for you
3:07Joanne McNally:I don't know he wants to have the fucking Euro tunnel thing I'm telling you now it doesn't go under the sea I found that out there but whatever it does go under the sea I can't see the sea sorry it does sorry yeah it does but you can't see Anthony you can't see the octopuses or anything like that I said that to him but I don't know he's determined
3:22Vogue Williams:I mean, it would be kind of dark and dingy if they'd come here to me. Spenny started a challenge today. He went and swam in the Thames for an hour and a half this morning at 6am. And I was thinking, imagine what's lurking in there. Like, oh, there's probably full, just dead animals, badgers. I once saw a badger in the Thames. And like, it was along the canal. So like, I used to go for a walk along the canal every day. There for about six weeks and just kept getting more and more bloated until I assume it burst one day and I just never saw it again.
3:52Joanne McNally:sorry what you saw a badger
3:55Vogue Williams:explode in the tent no I used to walk Winnie over when I lived by Victoria Park I lived by a canal and I used to walk Winnie along the canal and one day I spotted something in the canal and I was like what the fuck is that a dead badger obviously he had fallen in and succumbed to the water and the dead badger yes
4:15Joanne McNally:and for weeks and weeks and weeks I walked he said he was But he's hardly alive. I have to say, I find this pivot in Spencer's character and life attractive. Watch yourself, folk. I have ADHD. I could do anything.
4:35Vogue Williams:I'd be desperate because he has it too. He got diagnosed. He has it too. Can you imagine the two of them
4:39Joanne McNally:living together? The trauma bond would be out of control.
4:43Vogue Williams:Can I stay though? I'd like to still be there and we can just take, like, oh yeah, that would be a perfect union.
4:50Joanne McNally:I need someone to run the house because it's certainly not going to be us
4:53Vogue Williams:all run the house
4:55Joanne McNally:yeah and raise the kids and all so the marriage won't last long if that's any consolation trust me
5:01Vogue Williams:well that's what everyone said about mine and Spence and eight years in we're still going strong did they say that?
5:05Joanne McNally:people are so mean aren't they?
5:06Vogue Williams:I heard one recently that I've this well it was actually I don't know it might go in the papers today I'm not sure because we just basically they give you a right to respond sometimes and like so we do and so we're like well that's complete bullshit so the story was it might come out today I'm not sure because it's so ridiculous I'm not sure if it will the story was that we are friends a friend, a source a friend of the couple said and I know it was you Joanne you dirty bitch said that Spencer said that Spencer and Vogue
5:42Joanne McNally:I don't remember but yeah go on what do I say
5:46Vogue Williams:Spencer and Vogue are headed for a breakup because they're spending so much time apart. And I can only assume it was because he wasn't in my content for Afrik because he came up on the Saturday. But I'm like, and maybe it's because he's going away as well on his thing for three weeks. But I'm like, can we not spend, like, any time apart? Do we have to be sewn together now to show that we're a united front? I'll
6:13Joanne McNally:say this. Firstly, the clickbaity, the thirst for clickbait shit is I was only looking I was going to post it and then I was like Joanne I think you are still a little tipsy from last night so don't there was an article titled Is Lily Allen the most mortifying mother in the world and I know and it was all about like the fact that she's singing about butt plugs and I was like I'm sorry so female artists can't mind their life like because you're a mother suddenly you can't talk you know me and you bro we always have these conversations about what's acceptable, what's not. But my point is, if I read an article about you and Spencer breaking up, even though you're one of my best friends and I have the inside scoop, I'd probably read it and be like, oh my God.
6:58Vogue Williams:I know, I know. But there's certain things that I read. I read something recently because there's been rumours flying around about me going places. And I read something and it was like, how could she go away and leave her children? And it's like, I wonder, do men ever get that? Remember I went on tour with you and people were like, oh how could she go away and leave her children because like I'm a human being outside of being a mother like it doesn't mean that I can't go and do something that I want to do you can be damn sure my kids are really well looked after but like it's like it's like you can only be one thing and the worst part about it is it's usually women saying it and I'm like just don't say that because like we should be allowed go and work and like like you don't need to concern yourself with how other people's children are you like you can be a working mom and also be a great mom and it's just there should be no shade around that it just annoys me and i know something about lily ann and it's not not anything dark but i know something to prove that she is a fucking great mother who works a great working mother it's really random for me to say that but like i just i heard it yesterday and i was like that's so nice of her that she like they're always it made me think they're always on the forefront of her mind wherever she's going whatever she's doing she's always making sure that they're there and happy and stuff like that.
8:15So back off.
8:18Joanne McNally:Nothing pisses me off more than faux feminism, fake feminism. And it's a real issue.
Read the full transcript
8:28Vogue Williams:And fake and fake worry as well. It's like, I also read this thing yesterday and I nearly responded to it. And I was like, don't respond because then it looks like, because then they'll know you've seen it. Because it was on an article I saw about me, but it was on Instagram and I looked at the comments and this girl was like oh I think like said one thing and then she goes but I really don't like her and then someone else goes why have you ever met her and she goes yeah I have actually and I looked at her profile and I'm like you've never fucking met me I've never seen you before in my life you're full of shit and I nearly wrote back oh really when did we meet because I've never seen you before
9:01Joanne McNally:I think you should you know sometimes I'm like let's fuck shit up
9:05Vogue Williams:we're very sometimes like
9:06Joanne McNally:yeah get involved I felt very Selena Gomez
9:09Vogue Williams:you know the way she sometimes does I was like, well, I do a Selena. Hello. I've never met you before. Yeah.
9:16Joanne McNally:Send me the deets. Send me the deets. When? Yeah.
9:22Vogue Williams:Imagine she wrote back this perfect description and I'd be like, oh, yes, I don't have a great memory.
9:28Joanne McNally:Electric picnic 2019. You're like, oh, shit. It's you, her and the Coronas.
9:36Joanne McNally:No one's their best self at electric picnic.
9:38Vogue Williams:That's all I'm going to say. a hundred
9:45David Attenborough is alive
9:52Vogue Williams:yeah Joanne's just come on and told Jo and I he was dead because she got the news from Reddit something came up
9:59Joanne McNally:in a Reddit thread and I Christ alive I'm on I'm on the edge and David if you're listening I'm a big fan of you and animals but I feel like he's like the father he's like the only kind of responsible one left and he's 99 and I guess I'm on I'm kind of waiting which is terrible he could have another 20 years with science put him in a tube keep him going freeze him like your man Walt
10:27Vogue Williams:clone him clone him he needs to be cloned that's the only exception there's an exception and it's David Attenborough get it done
10:34Joanne McNally:that's such a good idea yeah
10:37Vogue Williams:questions about my sexuality Hi Joanne Vogue and do you know what I actually have never questioned mine which I found like it's a bit
10:47Joanne McNally:boring. Me and Vogue have a mutual friend and she told me I am the straightest woman she's ever met in her life and she says sometimes I walk she says you don't walk like you're trying to attract men you walk like you're trying to repel them Yeah So yeah I think we are Turbo straight Turbo straight women yeah
11:08Vogue Williams:Okay Hi Joanne, Vogue and Jo I've been listening to your podcast for ages now and I've become obsessed with it I recently started listening through all the episodes again from the start I would highly recommend to do this to all listeners it's even more gas the second time around I would hate to have to do that I wouldn't like to know anything I've said in the past
11:26Joanne McNally:I can't even listen to us
11:29Vogue Williams:so like I have to listen back to our pods and if I'm in any way in a bad mood I'll listen to it and I'll just ring Luisa and I was like are we dickheads? Do we sound like dickheads? Because I think that we're dickheads and she's like I think you're in a bad mood and then I could start listening to it again the next day. I'm like okay I was in a bad mood. Well I
11:45Joanne McNally:as you know I love us again. There's three times I've listened to this podcast back in all three different ways it didn't work well it didn't work out well for anyone involved really. I talked to the WhatsApp group None of us enjoyed it. I was on to tell directly about the edit yeah so I've decided it's just better.
12:00Vogue Williams:Anyway okay I am a gay man who's happily in a relationship I love my boyfriend with all my heart. He's given me faith in men again after many dickheads. Yes, gay men are as bad as straight men, possibly worse. But my dilemma today is with my sexuality. Since puberty hit, I've been attracted to men. I hid my sexuality until I was 18 and I finally came out. Being from rural Ireland and a very Catholic family, this was a massive deal. The whole situation set me into a deep depression, oh God, which still haunts me to this day. and I've had such intense shame over my sexuality for years. Oh, my family have been outstanding throughout all of this and are very welcoming to my now boyfriend.
12:43Vogue Williams:However, recently I've been having intense urges to be with a woman. I have never so much as touched a fanny.
12:50Joanne McNally:Fair play.
12:52Vogue Williams:So I don't know where this has come from. Platinum gay. A night's out I've always been approached by women and not men as I get told I come off as straight passing. and never in the past have I been tempted by getting off getting with any of the women that approach me but now that's all changing during the night I'm having intense vivid sex dreams about going down on a woman I have always seen myself as a gay man but I've been having such sexual urges towards women constantly now I really wouldn't want to go down on a woman and I think all women are gorgeous every part of you but I just don't want to go down there well remember
13:27Joanne McNally:I had the dream that I was going down on Gemma Collins
13:33Vogue Williams:well I had that dream about Brandon Courtney did you see the time you were going down at Brandon Courtney no I wasn't going down but I was massaging him in the bath do you not remember
13:50Joanne McNally:you're so frigid just go down on him will you
13:56Joanne McNally:massaging him in the bath
14:01Vogue Williams:I think I saw him in his little budgie smoke clothes when he was away on holidays with you and it got me going
14:07Joanne McNally:I love when I get a call from Fiog and I just hear the splash there's this gentle splashing and I'm like are you ringing me from the bath again?
14:17Vogue Williams:I ring people from the shower and they're like why is it echoey? I'm like oh I'm in the shower
14:22Joanne McNally:Do you remember when Winnie when he was losing his mind he used to follow you into the shower Do you remember?
14:26Vogue Williams:God love him Oh, Winnie.
14:28Joanne McNally:I know. Poor old Watt and Mops.
14:31Vogue Williams:Okay. I feel intense guilt over this as I love my boyfriend so much, but I just feel there's a part of me that's urging to explore my sexuality once again. I feel dirty and even guilty thinking about this as it feels like I'm cheating in my dreams and thoughts. Do you think it's a case of curiosity that's fueling this or is it some fucked up Catholic guilt coming back to haunt me? Have you or Vogue ever had sex dreams about women or Joe, about men? Love you and thank you for the two episodes. of the pod every week genuine highlight I think that's completely
15:02Joanne McNally:normal I'm jealous of your libido because I am dead from the ways down at the moment I'd love to be dreaming about going down on anyone to be honest I need to have my like genitals resuscitated at this point so I am genuinely envious of this guy who wants to ride everyone I think this is fantastic honestly well
15:22Vogue Williams:on the 9th of December on the 9th of December you'll be back to yourself.
15:28Joanne McNally:Marcus, Marcus, I forgot about that day. Yeah, Marcus on the minds. Hopefully you never listen to a single episode of this podcast. I'd say I'll be getting a quick, discreet cancellation.
15:41Vogue Williams:Oh, weird. Marcus has gone off to you.
15:47Vogue Williams:I don't know. I think that that's completely normal. And I think that you, like, I mean, it's difficult for you not to maybe give it a go. but like if you're in a relationship I wouldn't suggest doing that when you're in a relationship but is it something that's going to go away I'd give it a few months see if it persists and then see what you could do Women are hot scratch that itch Women are hot and they're so nice as well
16:13Joanne McNally:Scratch that itch I'm so jealous you even have an itch to scratch Ride everyone What's this lad's name?
16:21Vogue Williams:Oh he didn't give his name for obvious reasons Christ that sounded bitchy didn't it? What? When I said he didn't give his name for obvious reasons that just sounded really bitchy
16:33Joanne McNally:Well he's kind of probably because he's in a relationship But honestly Also I know I know I know and Vogue we share these friends I know men living straight lives who are absolutely bi
16:48Vogue Williams:Do you know what I mean? I know men who are
16:52Joanne McNally:identifying as a straight husband with children who are absolutely riding lads on the side. 100%. So of course it goes it goes both ways. Yeah, do you know what I mean?
17:04Vogue Williams:God, I never even thought about that. Yeah, that is very true.
17:07Joanne McNally:And the beauty so fucking true and the beauty of modern life is there are no boxes anymore. There's no lanes. Do what you want. You know what I mean? I couldn't be more thrilled for this guy. What a journey he's about to go on.
17:21Vogue Williams:Well, we hope that that journey goes well. DM me.
17:24Joanne McNally:He's perfect for me. I want a straight game as a partner. I think that would be a really good fit for me. To very quickly answer the partner question that was directed at me, no, I haven't had dreams like that. But that's just... He just wanks off men in real life!
17:43Joanne McNally:You're not sleeping long enough, Pop. I knew there was no way through that. Time for the end of the podcast. You ever took it back? would you be do you ever tuck it in no never no never felt you've never done that where you turned it into a vagina
18:01Vogue Williams:you've never turned it into a vagina I think me and Vogue
18:05Joanne McNally:spill our guts on this thing and you don't don't bring honesty or authenticity to this podcast all of what I've said is honest and I try to be authentic as possible you've never tucked your penis in between your legs well probably at some point There you go.
18:23Vogue Williams:We knew it.
18:25Joanne McNally:We knew it. I imagine that's probably it. Can't pray the lies, Joe. The lies. Fine. Well, there we are. I'd be felt, if I had a penis, I'd be felt in a left, right and center just to see where it looks.
18:36Vogue Williams:Jesus, she's going to talk about her origami now, folding it in. Jesus Christ. Remember that can I do that? Fold it in.
18:46Joanne McNally:Fold it in like an origami.
18:46Vogue Williams:When did you say that? She was like, I had to fold it.
18:50Joanne McNally:I had to fold. When I wanted a rich fella, I was like, I don't care if he's impotent, so I'll foul it in like an origami master. Yeah. Great memory vault.
19:09Vogue Williams:This has been a Global Player original production.
From the publisher
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This episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.