MTGM EXTRA! "She's back in touch..."

0:02This is a Global Player original podcast.

0:10Hello and welcome to my therapist ghosted me with me, Vogue Williams, and Joanne McNally. And Joanne, we've a follow-up conclusion to the five-year ghosting. We've been asking for her for weeks and she has written back to us.

0:22Joanne McNally:We're very excited. What's going on, guys? How are we? Hello. what's the news what's the gossip what's the scandal what's the news at the time of going to press as my mother says every time I call well I I have been momming as you said this week quite a lot and I just took the kids to Emerald Park today which is amazing but I am like you know when you're so tired it's like when you're coming down with the flu or something I'm so tired after and I'm just like whoa and they didn't want to leave and I'm like how have you got energy to stay here. Well, I'm writing like a bastard at the moment. So I took one of my ADHD meds this morning and my brain feels dry.

1:07Joanne McNally:I don't know what it is. It just makes me feel dry. My brain feels dry and itchy. That kind of sounds quite nice. Oh no, I want to be a bit moisty. The brain to be a bit moisty. You want a nice wet breath. You need a bit of mental lubrication and I guess it is, but it's like just being on speed. By the way, speaking of writing, Pinafone starts this week. A tiny little plug for Barcelona, Bournemouth, Liverpool. That's it. Everywhere else I think is pretty much gone at this stage. At this side of Christmas anyway. Obviously in Killarney and Castle Bar but they know what they're doing to me. And when this airs it'll be starting tomorrow in Glasgow.

1:39Joanne McNally:Wait. Oh, I love Glasgow. I know. That's a really nice place to start. Wow. King's Theatre, yeah. It's a stunner. It's a stunner. We did it. Remember? Huge orchestra pitch. Remember? Yeah, it was amazing. I do remember. And everyone does just so much crack in Glasgow. We're going to have a great time. it's a great start but if anyone around the Barcelona area because we've gone to a bigger room tell your mates October 9th I think what date is your birthday? October 2nd October 9th you're in Chester oh let's not go down this rabbit hole they've got Google do you know what I mean I'm in October 9th oh my god this is where I go back to I actually you'll never get so much web traffic from me on joannmcnally.com I'm like where is I forgot about this.

2:28This was like the last time you were doing it. I was like, where is she? Always. Joe, I don't know why you're laughing. You're going to be up the fucking walls. I am the one who visits that site the most. During records, before records, after records, a lot of the time, just see what's going to be tomorrow. Just chip me. Please. Check her internet connection in the hotel. Someone help us.

2:50Joanne McNally:God. We should. Do you know what the three of us should do we've never done? We should put each other and find our friends. Wouldn't that be sweet? No. Would that be cute? I will if you want. I'd love to tag you, Joanne. I'd love to watch you running around as I rot away in my boffas. I'd absolutely love to have you on. But come on, Joanne, let's do it. I'm just worried about you. I want to keep an eye on you. We're like the three bears. You move too much, Vogue. I move too little and Jo's kind of in the middle somewhere. Yeah, that's what it is. I think we've spoken about being at three bears before and it really makes sense.

3:29Joanne McNally:Her chip is broken. It's, because it's just frantic moving up and down. Like she just ran to Liverpool this morning. What is her fucking deal? Whereas Joe's just kind of doing his bits and bobs, going about his business and then I look like I'm dead. You'll be sending the medics and my mother to the flat. Like she hasn't moved. She hasn't even turned in the bed in three days. Someone's going to the bed sores. Yes, thank you folks. Someone do the bed sores please. I went, I was so, I was put back in my box. I thought I've been getting really good at running. I was running with my friend who was 27 weeks pregnant.

4:04Now she is an amazing runner. And I was just still behind her. A woman who's 27 weeks pregnant. Really? It's going to have to stop running soon. And I was like, right, that's me. That's my start again. I still haven't improved.

4:17Joanne McNally:Yeah, but there's pace and stuff, you know. Like I watch people from my window exercising just so I can, you know, lap it up. I like to pedal but I do I don't know I watch them run and someone they run like they're on air like I can't they just make it look so easy and it's really inspiring to watch and then you get out there and it's really hard it's really sorry I get out there first of all and if I'm running with Spen or something I'm like listen to how hard they're stomping their feet like I'm some like I'm Linford Christie and then I go out with my mate he's like about to give birth and I just drag along behind I was like we can probably walk we walk for this bit Johanna she's probably very you know established and experienced run with me Vogue you'll feel like Usain Bolt no I remember I ran when he once I just had Jo pushing pushing the bed along beside you as I just two laps of Battersea bark Jo behind the bed just like wheeling me along faster faster push me faster I need water Jo I'm so thirsty do you not remember that time that time we ran together in Ballast City Park and we'd gone out to do the run we hadn't even gotten to that like pagoda thing and you had stopped about three times and you were like I don't want to run with you anymore I'm going this way and I was like oh the run's over yeah I was like you just run along there because I can't firstly the fact that you chat and run is terrifying I don't think you thought you were putting your headphones in when I was going we were on a date sure you'd do that with my ex when we were on holidays That's fair enough though I would have too One of my exes I used to make him walk ahead So that I could put my airpods in And listen to podcasts Isn't that terrible I'd be like I'll give you a head start I'd be like I don't want one I was like no no you're having one Just have a head start And I'll meet you at the restaurant Which is an hour walk from here I just want to listen to my podcasts Yeah I want to catch up in the world And they'd go to the restaurant And she'd order her wine And then put the headphones back in Yeah Oh we're not talking I got him a colouring book I'm like, I've got you a colouring book.

6:23Joanne McNally:You doodle away there. Mummy's going to read the papers. Holidays are testing for most relationships, friendships, parental relationships, romantic relationships. You know, it's a lot of time with one person. But yeah, I mean, you shouldn't really be sending them off with a head start. But there you go. Look, love is love and life is life. You would find it desperate to be on holidays with me because you wouldn't. And I'd struggle with you because you'd try and ignore me all the time, but I would be like a dog, like humping your neck, just trying to get your attention. You just, you're never, yeah, off as such.

7:01I love having the chats. Oh, I am off at about half seven.

7:04Joanne McNally:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah. I'd be putting you down early. Half six bedtime for you. You didn't have a nap today. Yeah, and you missed your nap now. I really felt that.

7:18Joanne McNally:It's been all day, folk. It's been all day. Have a packet of carrot sticks and shut up. Folk, you need a bit of screen time, love. Bit of screen time. Bit of Peppa Pig.

7:32Joanne McNally:It's whatever you're used to. Some people are just really big chatters. Like I was doing, when we were filming that Dermot Bannon thing that we were talking about the other day, like we, obviously hair and makeup started about half seven and then you're chatting, I was chatting with Liv obviously in the morning and then chatting all day, like doing the filming and then chatting with the crew and we weren't filming, you know. And by the end of the day, I was like, I, my, to use the term, to use the Zeitgeist term, my social battery was dead. Even mine was after that long day. Mine was gone. I had people come and drop and stuff up for the party and I was like, oh, can you just, can you just leave it in private?

8:10Joanne McNally:Yeah, you do. Even you, Vogue, do run out eventually. Yeah. I do. I do stop talking after a while. and we need to recharge they're like what's wrong with you like cheer up I'm like I'm fine just leave me alone yeah you're like I've just stopped talking for three minutes yeah no I'm not dead I'm still here it's a great gift any other news well the house is back to normal everything's cleared up they took the glasses I tried Joanne that's pricks they took them I only kept three but I know I have no idea I have no idea what you're talking about to be honest. Absolutely. I loved them so much. She thought she would go to 10 of them.

8:52You'd love them. I actually got her. There was a photographer up I was like get a picture of those cups will you?

9:01We have an email back from the five year ghoster. So the woman who got ghosted after being with somebody for five years didn't really give us the whole story. She's been back in touch.

9:13Joanne McNally:She's finally she's seen our back call. Beaming out of Leicester Square. Dying for an update. Jo texted us about it and I was like I can come on the pod early today if you can. Dying to do this. She was dying to do it Jo. Have you read it already? No. No. I had to do it in real life. IRL. Okay you ready? Okay. We can't act Jo remember. No we can't act. We've established that. All genuine here then. Okay. Dear Boak and Joanne I'm back in touch after your request with a few more details around my ex of five and a half years who ghosted me some context it happened in June oh my god there's loads it's a big email it happened in June it was a Friday night I don't think you should dump anyone in the evening time because that really affects their sleep I'd rather be dumped in the morning and allow myself to like deal with it and then possibly get a good night's sleep yeah fair that's the first issue yeah yeah asshole we need to keep need to keep the flow of this because I'm I really, as much as I love chatting about your sleep, I'd really love to hear about the email.

10:22Okay, eight hours solid last night. Only woke up once. I got home from work and expected him back within a couple of hours. The evening rolled on and I assumed he was out for drinks, which was fine. But I was a bit annoyed he hadn't mentioned it. Eventually, I messaged him. Why do I keep going into Sean Connery?

10:39Joanne McNally:Message. There's something, it feels like a Friday evening. There's a bit of a Giddiness in the air If I may Actually a Tuesday afternoon I know yeah Is it? Oh my god I usually hate Tuesdays I'm having the best Tuesday I've ever had It's freelance life No one knows if they're alive What day of the week it is It doesn't matter Sorry folk Now I've done it Please continue Eventually Can you imagine What mine and Joanne's conversations Are like when we actually Go out with each other Oh my gosh Have we just done Even Jo's now Rolling his tiny eyes Eventually I messaged him but notice messages only going to be one tick.

11:15Weird. Dead battery, maybe. I called, also no luck. Then I got worried, so I called his friend who said he didn't know anything. I called his folks and they said they hadn't heard from him. So yeah, I basically thought he died. No sleep that night. No sleep that night. And at 8am Saturday morning, his mother sent me a really short message. He's okay. I've spoken to him what a bitch what a bitch I called her

11:47Joanne McNally:the mothers involved didn't I say this to you didn't I say this to you before I said we spoke to someone else about this well via this medium and I said the mothers they'll always back their sons at the end of the day you think they're your friend when you're going out with their sons they'll always back their sons I just feel like I wouldn't I wouldn't allow that I'm sorry I think there's a level of being saying to your son and then being like cop the fuck on and don't be a coward and deal with this like a man. Yeah, yeah but publicly they will always have their sons back. Not always most of the time from my experience always with me.

12:23Joanne McNally:Sorry, go on. I called her for more information but she didn't pick up. I've messaged her loads and she's just been really cryptic and eventually she's cut contact well like mother like son. Two wankers. I worked out he wasn't coming back by Saturday night and then drowned myself in a bottle of vodka. Oh God. Never do this girls. It's dangerous. Piss on milk after and you'll be fine. You can get it down in Holland and Barris. Please drink responsibly. Do drink responsibly. It depends if it was a 70 CL or a litre as well. A 70 CL over the course of a night isn't like the worst thing you could do.

12:59Jo, why are you

13:01Joanne McNally:playing the woman? You should be saying date responsibly. Date responsibly. I mean everyone. I don't mean this woman. No, you're victim blaming. Okay, come on. we're going to get some good shit here. I've been waiting since two o 'clock. Thistle milk. Go on, Vogue. Sure, but the hangover from a bottle of vodka on its own and no food should be illegal. In the time since, his dad came round. Oh God, another arse. All that whole family, full of them. His dad came round and picked up a load of his stuff while I was at work. Oh. Oh. The dad's in on it too. It's a family affair. Oh, and I've had to cover the rent on my own.

13:36I'm hopefully going to recover my money through small claims? Yes! The small claims court, but all contact is being completely ignored.

13:44Joanne McNally:We're going to court. Sorry, did I miss something here? The mother just said he's okay. She didn't say like, she just said he's okay. Yeah, I've spoken to him and then just sent like very cryptic messages back and forth and then basically cut contact. But all contact has been completely ignored. Other than that, I know as much as you. The mad thing is that if I was hearing this being read out, I would think, I bet she's a fucking nightmare. But like, honestly, I'm not I'm pretty normal and if anything I let a lot go more than my friends would thanks for your advice on the pod and don't worry if this is too long Dorita oh my god she's so nice

14:27nobody deserves something like this and even if you were a bit of an RS hole you still don't deserve it no you don't you just don't after five years like just

14:36Joanne McNally:and we don't we don't let Melters listen to the podcast send me his address send me his address she'll get the hoath massive on him send us his Instagram we could ruin him and we will what an arsehole though that is just I actually think that that is just so I could ruin him I'm just making some calls you'd you'd you'd you'd you'd say you would and then he'd forget about it. Well, do you know, we could certainly do. Yeah, no, you're right. Okay, I'm not the best person to follow through. What we could do is completely cock block this man, but we won't because it's not our business. And he is going to cock block himself.

15:18So...

15:19Joanne McNally:She should put him up on... No, no, no, do you want to stop? She put him up on Are We Dating the Same Lad? You know that thing where all the women... But I think some of the men are suing now and stuff. I think it's gone a bit... It's gone a bit toxic. She's already taken him to court. She doesn't need him to take her to court as well. I would say definitely. Bring him to the small claims court though because that little bit of justice will make you feel better and he signed a contract to live in that house with you for a certain amount of time. He owes half that rent and you get that money and you take yourself on holidays.

15:46Joanne McNally:Small claims for a small man. I bet you he gets his dick filled with filler. Yeah. Hung like a pigeon's foot I'd say. Yeah. And I'd say he has bad breath as well. Halitosis.

16:02And bleeding gums as well because of halitosis. Corn. is so bad.

16:05Joanne McNally:And corn, corn, corns. What do they call those lumps on your toes? Disgusting. Corns. No, let's go Verrucas. Corns aren't as bad as Verrucas. Are they not as bad? I think Verrucas are worse. Yeah. Yeah. Probably, he's probably got syphilis. I'd say super syphilis and super gonorrhea. That's what I heard. And tell him the plague's back and it's coming for him. Right after it knocks on Joanne's door it's coming for him. Well, I want it for the social status.

16:38And so you can stay in your house more. Can't quite.

16:43Joanne McNally:Hear ye, hear ye. Once I'm not ringing a bell outside telling everyone to stay away, she's fucking riddled. That is just absolutely awful. And as well, when the family get involved, it's extra hurtful because you do want the parents to see. But like I say, they'll always take the side of the child. But I had a similar situation with a man I once went out with who, because I wasn't communicating enough with him, he decided to drop off communication with me all day for a day and kind of suggest that he was dead, basically. And I did that as well. I contacted his mother and was like, is he okay? And she came back and said, I'm going to go check.

17:23Joanne McNally:And then she never came back to me. And I was genuinely checking traffic accidents and stuff. And I was really worried. then I tried to contact her again and she never came back to me and then when I eventually had it out with him he had told her not to contact me and she didn't. I mean there's only so much that you can really like defend someone who's just doing something really wanky and they're actually defending him. Yeah but you don't know what he's said to them. You don't know. So he could have said complete violence to them and now they're like oh well she's awful when you're not. Or they're like yeah or they're like we're not getting involved but I do think if it was my son I would say listen FYI he's grand he's just trying to teach you some sort of weird lesson.

18:00Joanne McNally:I would but that's me we can't blame the mothers it's the sons that are the problem we can't be bringing the mothers into this no God he's desperate yuck you're well rid of him which I know you don't want to hear right now but in a while you'll think to yourself thank God I ditched him I always think though and like maybe you know obviously I'm a comic so it's different but I always think great fucking story though like come on that's a great story thank you for sharing it and thank you for sharing it with us and I hope that you start to feel a little bit better and drink is not the answer. It will just make you more anxious.

18:33It will. It just makes you more anxious. It's fine for a little while but it will just like make you more anxious when you're going through something like that. Thistle milk, you'd be grand. When I tried to do that with a break of just going to piss for ages and then just everything came crashing down and I was like, oh no, that wasn't a good idea.