Heights Hotline | The Best Thanksgiving Side Dish, Dry Ass Turkey & Is Halloween the New Christmas?

0:00Halloween is actually a better holiday than Christmas. You're a f***ing idiot, Thaddeus. Christmas is cool and all, but Halloween's the best. I'm trying to think in what world somebody would think Halloween is better. And the only thing that makes sense is that their parents gave them a s*** Christmas. Don't you put that on Thaddeus' parents. I'm definitely putting that on Thaddeus' parents. That's the only possible way Thaddeus thinks that, is that his parents gave them a s*** Christmas. If I'm just going to be honest, I'm kind of with Thaddeus in this one. Apparently, Brandon's parents gave him a s*** Christmas as well.

0:30welcome to this bonus episode of new heights a wondery show and we're your host travis kelsey this is my big brother jason kelsey subscribe on youtube wondery plus or wherever you get your podcast and follow the show on all social media at new heights show with one s and jason is now going to tell you what exactly you get in this bonus episode that's right welcome to today's bonus episode. That's right. Maybe you're here because you stumbled across us on your phone or internet or whatever your device is. Maybe you're here to see Travis Kelsey or listen to his voice. Just maybe you're here to listen to some holiday hot takes from some of the 92 percenters, call-ins, and other shenanigans about holidays and hot takes.

1:16All right, here we go. All right, we got a few options. The bold ones seem to be the ones that they prefer us talking about? I say you just go ahead and hit the bold ones. Alrighty. Holiday, Halloween better than Christmas? I can already know this is not accurate. Hey, this is Thaddeus from Kansas City. Thaddeus! Thaddeus, great name. My holiday hot take is that Halloween is actually a better holiday than Christmas. You're a fucking idiot, Thaddeus. Better decoration. You had us with Thaddeus and then you lost us. Just better all-around vibes. You get to spook kids and play pranks and christmas is cool and all but uh halloween's the best all right take it easy it's a hot take i mean he does share your love of scaring children it's a very hot take i love halloween it's great i'm very on board with halloween you can spook kids in christmas too that's the thing about spooking is that you can spook kids whenever yeah christmas is the greatest holiday on the planet there's not even there's not even something that compares to it yeah i'm There's just nothing that gets people happy like Christmas does.

2:24It moves the stock market. That's how influential it is. Consumer products. This is so ingrained into our culture and so unanimously. I knew Jewish people that celebrated Christmas. Don't say who they are because then they will be frowned upon. I think it's pretty commonplace at this point. I think I bet if you it's it's it's it's gone beyond religion at this point. It's like so ingrained into American culture and it comes down to family giving the holiday spirit like all of it. Like, it's just it's a fantastic holiday. And I love Halloween. But I mean, it couldn't sniff a fart of Christmas to be close to you two weeks off on Halloween.

3:08That's right. That alone. It's remarkable. It's a hot take. It's a very bad take. All right. Next one. Yeah, it's tough. Thaddeus, though. Great name. Great name. Horrible take on Christmas. This guy was getting cold for fucking presents every year. I just, the joy that Christmas gives you, just seeing the decorations, going to Christmas parties, the thanks, the joy of seeing another person open a present you give them. Like, what is this going to be? It's underrated. I just don't know that there's any. I'm trying to think in what world somebody would think Halloween is better. And the only thing that makes sense is that their parents gave them a shitty Christmas.

3:50I don't know what else. Don't you put that on Thaddeus' parents. I'm definitely putting that on Thaddeus' parents. That's the only possible way Thaddeus thinks that, is that his parents gave him a shitty Christmas. He's just got to see it clear. He's got candy vision. He's got spooky vision. He's just got to see it for what it is. But Halloween has candy. I mean, Christmas has candy, too. candy canes you hate candy canes i love candy canes what you don't like candy corn candy corn is shit yes exactly the the candy that represents halloween and the candy that represents christmas is night and day better for christmas they don't they don't make a christmas reese's yes they do it's a christmas trees yeah they make them yeah that that's not a stop it's the same you put candy in the stocking.

4:39It's basically the same thing, but you don't have to walk to other strangers' houses. You just get them from your loved ones. Thaddeus, you're kind of right, though. Christmas candies now. I'm kind of with Thaddeus. If I'm just going to be honest, I'm kind of with Thaddeus in this one. Apparently, Brandon's parents gave him a shitty Christmas as well. Oh, God. This is a failure. Anybody who thinks Halloween is better than Christmas, their parents have failed them. I had a great Christmas. I've turned into a Halloween guy in my old age. I don't know how that happened. Halloween's fine, but It doesn't hold a candle to Christmas.

5:11What were you this year, Brandon? Me? Oh, we did it one battle after another. I was Penisio Del Toro. I was Sensei. Oh, that's right. I saw that. Lauren was in DiCaprio. Yeah. Great costume. The dog was Sean Penn from that movie. Great costume. Have you ever tried to put a wig on a dog on Christmas? See, that's a Halloween thing. Thank you to our partner, Gillette. All right. Now, Jason, you've been retired for a full year. Let's talk pregame rituals. do you miss them still have them i kind of have one i guess for monday night countdown like i kind of i go to the production meeting then i kind of iron out what's happening in the rundown then i go to the makeup lady then i go to the hair and uh then i go on set i was just curious to see if you were putting that same game day energy into your uh new broadcasting routine that's all well first and foremost it includes making sure that this beard is looking real nice which is finally starting to show some of my grays again after dying it.

6:10I'm getting those natural colors back. Thank you. Thanks so much. But yeah, I have some grooming individuals that make sure it's looking nice and tidy. If you were looking for a tool to help wrangle it in a little bit, look no further than Gillette Labs NFL licensed razor. Special edition razors have those long-lasting Gillette Labs blades and the precision trimmer on the back that's perfect for cleaning up this guy. Nice. I hear it's a must-have for NFL fans this season, and clearly you too. Sold. Available now in 12 teams, including the Eagles and Chiefs. Get it while you can at Gillette.com slash NFL.

6:54Gillette, the best a fan can get. Thank you to our presenting sponsor, Reese's Oreo Cups. Ooh, Reese's Oreo? nice Reese's cups with Oreo cookie crumbs included you asked for it we definitely asked for it and it is finally happening for those of you that don't know we just said Reese's Oreo cups that's right they also have regular Oreos with peanut butter in the middle two fan favorites coming together to make everyone's day a million times better. Wait a minute. Could Reese's Oreo cups be like the Kelsey brothers of candy? Which one of us is Reese's and which one of us is Oreo? Which one of us is Reese's and which one of us is Oreo?

7:44Yeah. Are we talking about Oreo with peanut butter in the middle or Oreo with white in the middle? Just regular Oreo. I mean, I'm clearly Oreo. I'm a little bit darker.

7:55You got to love it. So grab these Reese's Oreo cups today. wherever candy is sold, better yet, grab them right now. Or we're going to grab them first because they are seriously that good. They are. And we wouldn't lie to you. They're very good. Thank you to our sponsor, KFC. Are you a dark meat or a breast cutting guy? When you get KFC, you can get it all. Just put it in that bucket. It's true. Thanks, Danny. He's coming up. And KFC is starting a little holiday debate. Turkey or chicken? Not much of a debate if you ask me. Yeah, let's be real. It's the you need gravy to survive it, Bird. It's beige of all kinds.

8:33Let's be honest. Is it really worth spending eight hours cooking a turkey when you could just get something better, especially if it just causes you to go through a drive-thru and get a bucket of it, maybe? How about KFC's Extra Crispy Chicken? Juicy, crispy, and always finger-licking good, baby. Extra crispy does sound good. It's the underdog choice for all your holiday gatherings. KFC is saying cluck turkey this Thanksgiving. That's right. We're inviting all of you to give dry turkey the bird. It's time to ditch the dry boring bird this holiday and order KFC instead. You can't go wrong with a bucket of chicken, a good game or movie, or just some good times with friends and family.

9:16Everybody's going to love it. If you show up to a Thanksgiving meal with extra crispy chicken from KFC, people are going to love you. Especially a bucket of it. If you come with a bucket of extra crispy fried chicken from KFC, you're going to get some thank yous. This year, skip the turkey and celebrate with KFC's extra crispy chicken. Hi, Jesus Travis. I would like to give an extreme hot take since it's the damn season. And that is turkey is one of the worst dishes on Thanksgiving of all time. Hard to agree. It's so dry and people who like it just are weird. Thank you. Listen, I'm fully, this is why I fry turkey.

9:49It's hard to eat turkey unless it's deep fried. I'm with you, man. Like, you know, boiled in fat grease. We never had turkey. We agree. We purposely never had turkey. Mom would make pork chops or some other meat. I love everything else about, well, I take that back. I love most other things about Thanksgiving fare, right? I'm a big mashed potatoes guy. I'm a big corn guy. Kylie makes a badass green bean casserole. Fucking love that dish. Mama Kelsey dinner rolls. Like everything else about Thanksgiving is so fantastic. and then it gets kind of muddled down with for the most part the way most people make it a dry ass bird that you got to splatter gravy and cranberry sauce on to redeem anything about it i mean it's just the honest you gotta fry it you gotta fry it or you gotta be in that thing non-stop injecting it with like you gotta fry it or you gotta fucking spatchcock that sucker there you go spatchcock it yeah or or what you haven't tried yet it's traducan you gotta stuff that thing with the duck you're right i have not tried the turducken but i'm very in on it the premise of it sounds incredible what um i'm out um what else was oh the other thing that i don't um pumpkin pie is okay but i think it's also commonplace for a lot of people maybe i'm wrong on this apple pie around thanksgiving i'll go on this apple pie it's got to be the most overrated dessert on the fucking history of top shelf desserts it's got to be there's got to be a fuck ton of cinnamon in that thing it's got to be a fuck ton of cinnamon and butter and i got a fucking that's got to overpower the apple i'm just not apple pie just doesn't i like ice cream so like when you put it with ice cream i'll do it that's the thing that's another thing i am definitely more of a cake guy than a pie guy although um steven cookies down the shore they make a mean blueberry pie it is fucking incredible see blueberry pie different type of pie and this is they do it weird to it like isn't as like i guess like jello-y you know what i mean like a lot of the pie is like a texture thing that i just don't really warm fruit doesn't make me excited i like cold fruit noted i'm trying to think there are pies that i like though pumpkin pie is not bad pumpkin pie key lime's the only key lime cold fruit key lime's a cold pie key lime pie is the closest thing to like cheesecake that i'll ever have i feel like raspberries would be good in a pie it's got to have a little bit more like tartness for it to be good apples just don't bring that like note that really makes me enjoy it that much i need something in the inside that doesn't just like give me like a comp you know i mean like a like a like a comp you know i'm talking about come i think it's c-o-m-p-t-e is what you're thinking about there it is yeah but it's is it compote it's compote c-o-m-p-o-t-e right there you go i think i know either way i don't like that that stuff i'm out on i don't mind if it's cold i just there's something about the warmness of pie that i'm just out desserts i don't like warm desserts were you ever were you ever uh uh apple that's not true i will do some warm desserts that's not true i'll take that back uh what were you ever a caramel apple guy no i don't like it i like apples i will eat an apple by itself.

13:06Apple with caramel? I'm not a big dressing. I like apple and peanut butter. I'll throw some peanut butter on that apple. So you don't like caramel is what you're saying? I like caramel in certain things. I just don't really... The other thing is a caramel apple for me with a beard to eat is just like sounds like the biggest disaster of all time. It's going to be fucking everywhere. I'm not... Yeah. Yeah, you could cut it up, I suppose. I just... Like I like caramel in certain things. I like caramel mixed with chocolate. I don't like caramel with apple. No. All right. Nice. Noted. yeah anyways i don't know what we just don't know where that even yeah so yes we agree turkey sucks all right sweet potatoes let's go let's hear it okay so my thanksgiving holiday hot take is that sweet potatoes have no place in a thanksgiving menu um whipped mac uh roasted they are just the least of the least they're the worst thing on the table and you're fucking on your mind This guy's a fucking idiot.

14:01Maple syrup, it's a dessert. Yeah, you're right. You're right. What are you trying to watch your calories? Put a marshmallow on top. Just have both. Where's this guy at? Sweet potatoes on your menu. You could do roasted root vegetables. You can do your mashed potatoes. Roasted root vegetables? Honey glazed carrots. Honey, I'm in on honey glazed carrots. Now you're just getting carrots to dessert. Honey glazed carrots. and they just don't go well. They don't meld well. They don't put marshmallows on potatoes. They're a dish, basically, in a whole bunch of savory stuff. You're not going to put your gravy over your sweet potatoes.

14:37You're not going to, you know, take a Brussels sprout and dip it in your sweet potato. Brussels sprout? That's just weird. You can't do it with bacon or anything. It's got marshmallows, maple syrup, and that's it. It's wrong. It should not be on a Thanksgiving table. That's my best hot take. well you're wrong sweet potatoes and marshmallows and freaking i think potatoes and sweet potatoes both you don't need to have one or the other and sweet potato fries if somebody made sweet potato fries i'd be fucking jazzed personally i don't understand the roasted root vegetable like this guy walks fucking did he go where the fuck he's the odd that is you want to talk about a hot take beets in here like what are we talking about and then he said like you can't you can't candy up the sweet potato but you can have candy carrots with honey glaze on them listen if you gave me the choice of honey glazed carrots or sweet potatoes or marshmallow on them i'm taking the sweet potatoes and marshmallow all day some roasted honey carrots are good though man i don't i'm not in on the honey carrots dude i got you yeah no carrots when they get roasted they just get mushy they get too mushy for me no you still gotta have that crunch a little bit yeah but it's If it's cooked perfectly, I could do it.

15:50Yeah. But I just, I prefer carrot cake. That's how I prefer my carrots. Ooh, see, now we're talking. Green cheese frosting? Dude, I didn't know you were a carrot cake guy. Next time you're in the city, I got a place. Dude. Get these little carrot cupcakes and make you feel like you're not doing too much? I'm not a big frosting guy. The only reason I think I like carrot cake is because of the cream cheese frosting. It is. Dude, I got the place for you. God damn, it's good. It's so good. I got the place for you. like what do we make an apple pie for just put the carrots in there jack stack has one of the best carrot cakes ever dude it's so good that people like just like go in and get the carrot cake like cupcakes just so that they don't feel too bad about getting the entire fucking mammoth of a cake that that you could get there we have a couple spots around here that we'll go and specifically just get the carrot cake and then we'll eat it like two fatties all day it's the best the best and they do they just slab that fucking cheesecake uh icing on there it's so fucking good no doubt we're big um stocks people as well in philadelphia that's a big dessert one for us i don't know how we keep getting back to desserts we keep getting back to desserts all right we're talking about sweet potatoes sweet potatoes are fine they're good they're fucking awesome i mean you can have sweet potatoes and mashed potatoes i don't think you have to differentiate between these two and i disagree like you can do sweet potatoes with marshmallows and the maple glaze.

17:11And then at the end of the day, you can have your dessert, too. Like, what do we... We're not calorie counting on Thanksgiving. No, that's not what we're doing here. We're making the most delicious thing possible. If that means throwing marshmallows on top of it, bring it on, brother. Throw that shit on top. Throwing roasted root vegetables. Like, that's fucking gonna get it done. Unless you're throwing fucking marshmallows on those. This guy's coming with beets. I don't even know if I'd like that. Yeah, I don't even know. I mean, I like beets, but that's if you put it with goat cheese and smother a bunch of fucking salad dressing on it.

17:45I just had a beet beer in Las Vegas. It was like a beet sour. It actually wasn't bad. Your curiosity to know what shit tastes like blows my mind. The fact that you actually had a beet. You'll try any kind of fucking beer, and it's absolutely disgusting. You gave me a fucking blueberry beer one time. and I wanted to fucking shoot myself. Probably great. It was disgusting. I like experimenting. I like a little citrus lime or something. Or like a... Yeah, a little garage beer lime. I got you. I like a cider. I'll drink a cider. Ciders, I'm not a big cider guy. It's too much. It's too sweet. But beet beer was good.

18:27It was okay. I wouldn't want to drink a bunch of it, but for one glass, it was a unique flavor profile. It had like a borscht sour-y kind of thing happen, and it was not bad. That's all I got for his sweet potato take. Yeah, the sweet potatoes. I mean. That was a rough take. That was a rough take. This is my last question coming from me, just based on that conversation. Oh, gosh. Really quick. No, no, this is good. This is good. Last question, real quick. What is the best Thanksgiving side dish? One, two, three, go. Ready? Green bean casserole. Ooh. Travis? Mag and cheese. Mag and cheese. Yeah, okay.

19:01I knew it was more of a Travis on this one. I knew we were locked in. The problem with mac and cheese is it's not. No, that's where you're wrong. The problem. There is no problem. Well, here's the problem. Here's the problem. If anything. It's an everyday. Not the way you make it on Thanksgiving. Yes, it is. It's not. You guys make it all the time. You guys are like, you guys are not just doing out of the box. You do it. I've had a baked a thousand times, too. Yes. Like, I don't. It's not always out of the box. I'm not. Green bean casserole is like an exclusive thing to Thanksgiving. Really? Maybe in your household, not mine.

19:34the sweet potatoes travis is having it every goddamn day i'm having it never travis is not having green meat gas room that's true i mean it's mac and cheese the answer i'll go one step further mac and cheese the day after get that congealed i'll go one step further and the mac and cheese is the most overrated dessert or a side item it's not i'm not a big mac and cheese guy travis has always been a big mac and cheese guy i've never been a big so now we have canada mad at us we have the mac and cheese fans mad at us we're just going down it's okay i just think it's overrated it's not there's a thousand other things you can have cheesy and i would prefer i think when you get it just right and it's got like that baked crust that is yeah i hear you if you get the crunchies to it get the crunchies it's good it's good you also can fuck it up real good too i've seen some people deliver some wet ass noodles it is not good i don't like shit too cheesy that green bean casserole god damn i can't wait wait does kylie make that what's in this green bean what do you make on thanksgiving jason what do you help with i fry the turkey and kylie doesn't even eat that so i pretty much make a turkey for myself this guy's so

20:43she doesn't trust me cooking this shit cooking it right what's in this casserole i believe i could be wrong because i've never made it uh green beans are a component i believe it's um like this mushroom uh oh my gosh what's it called it's like a cream mushroom thing that's like the base of it yeah it's like a creamy texture on it with green beans and then it's got uh fried onions on top of it basically like it's across the board i think travis is not a big fan of green bean casserole i think when i was there i tried it just because i was appreciative and thankful like my dad always taught me but i'm looking at pictures of it i know travis is out on this this is the anti-travis kelsey dish one thing we never had growing up that i'm a big fan of is cranberry sauce but kylie only likes the like canned cranberry sauce she's correct I don't like the canned cranberry sauce as much as I like like an actually made cranberry sauce.

21:33Yeah, because canned isn't actually made. Well, it's like more, I like a fresh cranberry sauce made rather than a cranberry sauce that's. I want to see the ridges. I want to see the outlaw. I don't like that. I want to see the ridges. I don't like that. I want to see the ridges, brother. I'm out on the ridges. I want that thing to call them plopping out and don't even touch it. Just let it sit as a cylinder. Like spam. Yeah. That's what it looks like. Let it be nasty. All right. So you like Jell-O. Exactly. That's what it is. Jell-O is technically cold fruit. I always steered clear Jell-O because it was always like hospital food.

22:03That is a little weird. I feel like pudding is more of a hospital food in my mind. I would like eat the Jell-O packs like they were fun dip. But I wouldn't fucking, I wasn't very in on. That's very funny. That is so funny. Yeah. Just dipping your little finger in there. Like that's like a Kool-Aid play. That's odd you would do that. Jell-O piping. You know what? You know what? That might be. No, I think it was Jell-O. I think it was Jell-O. I think you could technically do it with Jell-O too. It's just sugar and fruit powder. Yeah. Little Travis Kelsey with just green ass fingers. I wonder what he's been doing.

22:42All right. And that wraps up another edition of Heights Hotline. That's right. Nice. We'll have some more bonus content for you all in December. So stay tuned for what that might be. And now, once again, New Heights, a Wondry show. So please follow the show on all social media at new height show with one S. And, uh, we give a big shout out and a thank you to our production crew for always making this so much easier and so much more fun than it could ever be. And thank you to the 92 percenters for listening to us. Talk about absolutely nothing, but kind of something all at the same time. We love you guys.

23:14Happy Thanksgiving.

23:25Thank you.