CPAC Lines Up to Kiss Trump’s Ass

0:00We're doing a great job. There's never been a better year for a president. I mean, I've been rated. There has never been a better year for a president first year than what we had. that includes the stoppage of eight wars with the night to come. And what we've done, the economy is roaring. It's phenomenal. That's why I'm here. Yeah, it's hard to evaluate ourselves, Donald. We're doing a great job. But you don't allow anybody to disagree with you on anything. So, of course, you would think that you're doing great. We're doing a great job. And you know what? At this point, who am I to argue with this mental midget?

0:34Sorry, mental little person. We're doing a great job. Yeah, you are doing a great job, little buddy. There has never been a better year for a president first year than what we had. Now seriously, who are we to make fun of this man? Clearly he's got some special needs if he thinks he's doing a great job. We're doing a great job. Just smile and nod and be nice to the little guy. He's been through a lot and he just needs a nap on a big old nice porch at sunset with a warm blanket. in some Werther's originals. A rocking chair with an old pocket knife and that old chunk of bashwood that he's been meaning to whittle down into beautifully hand-painted mallards.

1:13Just in time for fall of 2026. I had an interpreter recently that wasn't good, talking to a very strong person from a different part of the world. And I could tell, even though I, even though I don't speak the language, I could tell the interpreter was not good. when you go, uh, uh, uh. When I give a long, flowing, beautiful sentence, and in this case it was a woman and she gave it in about one-fourth the time, I said, well, their language may be efficient, but it's not that efficient. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to divert your attention to a little story from our Vice President, J.D.

2:00Vance. A few, maybe actually a week or so ago, I walk into the Oval Office and Marco and I are sitting there talking with the President about something. He says, stop. And he looks at our shoes and says, you guys have terrible shoes. So he goes and gets a shoe catalog and gets his favorite shoes and orders like four pairs of shoes for me and four pairs of shoes for Marco because he's like, We need our vice president or secretary of state to look their very best. And then we went back to talking about whatever major international issue we were talking about. So Trump has been buying$145 floor shine dress shoes for people in his most inner circle.

2:42Marco Rubio was photographed wearing a pair that Trump ordered for him just by guessing his foot size. And they look incredibly too big, but he's walking around the White House with them anyway. Because you can't just send them back. To a guy like Trump, that's enough to get you kicked out of the circle of trust. You must wear your size 13s, even though Marco Rubio is 5 '9". Oh, irreverent news talk, opinion, satire. It's Newsweek Radio. I'm Jesse Edwards. Interesting to see some of these conservatives like Eric Erickson absolutely livid over Steve Bannon speaking at CPAC. Other folks are equally upset about Matt Gaetz being featured as a speaker as well.

3:18I don't know what they're getting so upset about. The buck does stop at the top here, people. and your president is the king-level boss grifter of them all. Of course shady goons like this are still tolerated in the conservative base. Steve Bannon presents himself as the intellectual godfather of MAGA populism, the same guy who pleaded guilty to fraud in the We Built the Wall scheme that, you know, stole millions of dollars from everyday Trump supporters who thought they were paying for the border wall. We're doing a great job. He spends his entire show screaming about elites ripping off the working class while scamming the same grassroots movement that he claims to represent.

3:58An absolute slimeball of slimeballs, who I've dubbed as the human scab here on Newsweek Radio. Matt Gaetz spent years under federal investigation for sex crimes with minors. So much that when Donald Trump floated him as a possible attorney general pick, the backlash was so brutal that Trump gave it to Pam Bondi instead. Were there any underage girls at that party or at any party that Trump attended with Jeffrey Epstein? This is so ridiculous and that they are trying to deflect. We're doing a great job. From all the great things Donald Trump has done. Hell, even Matt Schlapp, the chairman of the American Conservative Union that runs CPAC, has a sexual assault lawsuit.

4:40Accusing him of groping a male campaign staffer that was dropped after a$480 ,000 payout. The perception is that the entire conservative movement is swarming with these kinds of grifters these days, and some conservatives have the nerve to sit back shaking their heads like Ned Flanders, wondering how the movement turned into such a rotten pile of lecherous gypsies, tramps, and thieves. They warned me Satan would be attractive. Don't sit here clutching your pearls as if the president hasn't set the precedent. And yet they're all going to line up at CPAC, one after another, behind the same podium.

5:17Kissing my ass. Kissing Trump's ass with one side of their mouths and preaching about conservative values from the other. Even Roger Stone says he won't attend CPAC because Bannon is speaking. Wow. Imagine what you'd have to do to creep out a guy like Roger Stone. We got to get rid of this loser. This guy is bad. He's disloyal to the Republican Party. Most importantly, he is disloyal to the United States of America. No, Trump didn't say that about Steve Bannon or Roger Stone, for that matter. That's what Trump just said about Kentucky Congressman Thomas Massey, who has been a thorn in his side over the Epstein file since day one of his second turn at office.

5:58But imagine this. We now live in a world where Lindsey Graham is considered MAGA, while Thomas Massey is dead meat as far as Trump is concerned. He is disloyal to the United States of America. Disloyal to the United States? Is Donald Trump smoking crack? We gotta get rid of this loser. According to the American Conservative Union scorecard, the same conservative grading system tied to CPAC, Massey routinely ranks near 100%. One of the most consistently conservative voting records in Congress. Lindsey Graham isn't even close. Apparently conservative doesn't mean how you vote anymore. It means how much you kiss Trump's ass.

6:37So I just want to say I feel good about the Republican Party. Lindsey Graham learned how to do that rather quickly, considering that these two men were recently mortal enemies. Right now, Thomas Massey is still favored to hold onto his seat despite this pathetic and desperate move by our president. We're doing a great job. About a two-to-one chance of surviving the primary, but Trump has turned the race into a disgusting loyalty purge, dumping millions into the district to try to take him out. And it figures, too, right? The one representative left standing that I would be most likely to bet is least corrupt?

7:08Trump, of all people, finds the need to take them out. What the hell is in those Epstein files that Trump would need to take things this far to bury them? I know, we've all asked ourselves that question a million times. And pure speculation here, but I think it's because Mar-a-Lago was the original Epstein Island, in the sense that Epstein was Trump's protege. Just look at the evidence. Epstein himself said that Trump was his closest friend. So how do you know this? That was closest friend. Now, we don't know if that's how Trump felt about Epstein exactly, but if Mar-a-Lago was in some sense the original Epstein Island that delivered underage girls to the powerful billionaire class via the Miss Teen USA pipeline, you can start to see why somebody like Trump might find it reasonable to start World War III just to keep all that from coming out.

7:55But again, you know, we're only left to speculate because they're keeping all the facts away from us with every ounce of power that they have. We have the recordings of Donald Trump openly bragging to Howard Stern about intentionally entering the dressing rooms of underage girls just to look at them when they're naked. I go backstage before a show. Yes. And everyone's getting dressed and ready. And I'm allowed to go in because I'm the owner of the pageant and therefore I'm inspecting it. Is everyone okay? You know, they're standing there with no clothes. Is everybody okay? And you see these incredible looking women.

8:25And so I sort of get away with things like that. I remember being in the back and hearing the chaperones say, ladies, listen up, we've got someone that's going to come in and see you. Make sure you're at least covered up. All of the girls were changing, getting their bras and underwear on and getting ready to put on their opening number outfits. So when Donald Trump walked in, there were women in there who weren't fully clothed. Correct. Women were not fully clothed when Donald Trump came in. And some of those women were, what, as young as 15? Yes, 15 years old. this would have been more than enough to get presidents of the past not only impeached, but deported.

9:03The filth has always been out in the open, but we've been crippled from being allowed to put two and two together and say that Trump has already admitted to everything he's ever been accused of. And it still doesn't make any difference. It doesn't make any difference. If we as a people are incapable of keeping somebody like him contained, then that failure is on our shoulders, we the people. And it's time for us to face the brutal possibility that this vast and complex system of government that we've built around ourselves like a cocoon is beyond the point of reform and must be started over again with a new set of rules.

9:41Why do we need a representative government when we the people are more than capable of representing ourselves? Why do we need a so-called representative government that only seems to serve to make life more expensive for us as they cash in on insider information and ignore the will of the people for simple things like term limits and affordable health care and lower taxes for problems that we never voted on to fix. You can't even balance a budget, yet you're stealing from our paychecks before we even get to see them. To add it to the Ponzi scheme of social security that's going to be bankrupt before any of us are able to collect our measly, what is it, thousand dollars a month?

10:16Screw you. And screw this ridiculously outdated circus that we call a constitutional republic, when it's clearly been an oligarchy ever since Citizens United turned American elections into a billionaire bidding war. If our government that was of, by, and for the people no longer speaks of, by, and for the people, then why the hell are we still playing by their rules? Because the bastards figured out how to keep us busy fighting with each other so we don't join forces at the ballot box to purge this system of elitist incumbent trash that's ruining our lives. You want to make a difference? Stop trying to own the left.

10:52Stop trying to own the right. Because you just look like a tool. The same useful idiot that the system you claim to hate needs for its own survival. Are you going to be part of the problem or part of the answer? Because doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results is exactly how they keep winning. That's it for today. Until we can do it again, it's Newsweek Radio. I'm Jesse Edwards. Catch you next time. Bye. And we say bye-bye. Newsweek Radio is a member of the Trust Project. We're doing a great job.