In short
The episode of Little Fish (host James Harkin with Andrew Hunter-Murray and Anna Tashinsky) is a QI-style “fact-checking” show: they read listener-submitted “sweet plums,” debate whether they’re true, and add context. Key topics include: an ancient Greek actor (Hegelicus) famously flubbing a tonal line at Euripides’ Orestes premiere (calm vs weasel), a “Gandhi could have seen Jack the Ripper” wind-turbine thought experiment, and a football coincidence: Justin Klivert missing a penalty on 29 June 2026 mirrors his father Patrick Klivert missing on 29 June 2000. Other notable claims: Colorado’s “Denver” named for Governor James Denver despite his resignation; Norway’s Order of the Norwegian Lion awarded mostly to Swedes; Kenyan cave elephants dig for salt.
Guests
Andrew Hunter-Murray and Anna Tashinsky.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOThe Fluff-Up of Hegelicus
1:46 to 2:55
Discussion of an ancient Greek actor's infamous line flub during a play.
“I feel like we've heard from Doug Steen before.”
Bloopers in Ancient Times
2:56 to 3:56
Exploration of how bloopers and outtakes were perceived in ancient Greece.
“If it was in English, that would have been what it was.”
Gandhi and Jack the Ripper
4:00 to 6:50
Speculative discussion on the unlikely connection between Gandhi and Jack the Ripper.
The Origins of Denver
6:52 to 10:52
Discussion about the naming of Denver after a governor who had resigned.
“I think the months don't quite stack up But if we're saying he's clever enough to sort the months out, you know.”
Women's Baseball League Names
11:01 to 12:30
Details on the names of teams in a new professional women's baseball league.
“This is from Blake Hossack and it's sort of about sport and it's sort of about American names.”
Norwegian Order of Knighthood
12:31 to 13:34
Facts about the Norwegian Order of the Lion and its recipients.
“were kind of a joint country around that time, and all the people who received it were actually Swedes.”
A Royal Reflection
13:35 to 14:00
Discussion on Queen Elizabeth II's various knighthoods and legacy.
Discussing Knight Impersonators
14:00 to 16:28
The hosts share hilarious anecdotes about impersonators of British royalty.
“Otherwise, that would be, you know, the zombie queen.”
Exploring Kenyan Cave Elephants
17:28 to 19:32
Learning about the fascinating behavior of Kenyan cave elephants and their salt-seeking habits.
“I think this is the best fact I've read this week from a listener.”
Facts and Trivia Time
19:32 to 22:22
The hosts share interesting facts, including those from listeners about famous personalities and historical events.
“Yeah, they're really like they're properly high-end tech now.”
Show all 15 chapters
Humorous Fact Distribution
22:22 to 28:00
The hosts hand out amusing facts to listeners while providing comedic commentary.
“where we hand out some of our facts to people on the top tier of our patreon if you want to get your own fact then go to patreon.com slash no such things as a face join on the top tier and we will make you a custodian.”
Interesting Facts and Their Origins
28:00 to 29:56
Explore quirky facts shared by the hosts and their humorous interpretations.
“One of those facts, you cannot see which way it's going, you know?”
Monogrammed Gifts and Personal Stories
29:56 to 30:28
The hosts discuss the concept of monogrammed gifts and share personal anecdotes.
“If you're listening now and you've already sent your resignation letter.”
Monogrammed Gifts and Personal Stories
33:14 to 33:45
The hosts discuss the concept of monogrammed gifts and share personal anecdotes.
“Kitchen and bathroom professionals know what goes behind the tile matters.”
Monogrammed Gifts and Personal Stories
33:49 to 34:19
The hosts discuss the concept of monogrammed gifts and share personal anecdotes.
“Pro that knows everything about interior paint, easily compare prices and read reviews.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Andy Dawson:Save big on your next project at Menards. Check out our huge selection of Richmond water heaters. Whether it's electric or gas, tank or tankless, Menards has what you need in stock. Ensure that you have hot water when you need it most with a new Richmond water heater from Menards. Plus, check out our weekly flyer on Menards.com for all the great deals happening now. Save big money at Menards. Save big on your next project at Menards. Check out our huge selection of Richmond water heaters. Whether it's electric or gas, tank or tankless, Menards has what you need in stock. Ensure that you have hot water when you need it most with a new Richmond water heater from Menards.
0:50Andy Dawson:Plus, check out our weekly flyer on menards.com for all the great deals happening now. Save big money at Menards.
1:13Andy Dawson:Hello and welcome to another episode of Little Fish. My name is James Harkin. I am joined today by Andrew Hunter-Murray and Anna Tashinsky and we are going to go through all of your facts, things that you sent to the email podcast at qi.com and he has gone through them. He has picked out the very sweetest of plums, as we often say, and he's sent them to us and we will read them out and discuss them and see if they're true, see if they're not true, see if they're interesting, see if they're not interesting. Who knows what we will do? But let's get started. I've got a sweet plum. Go on then. Doug Steen sent this in.
1:49I feel like we've heard from Doug Steen before. Oh yeah. And Frequent Flyer Doug Steen says if you've not already seen it i thought you might find this fun and as professional entertainers
1:59Andy Dawson:that's us that's the nicest thing anyone's ever called me i think very sweet isn't it thanks doug but he says let this be a cautionary tale hegelicus an ancient greek actor we only know about him because he really really fluffed up his line and then he sent a link and it is this guy who's incredibly famous throughout ancient greece because at the premiere of euripides Orestes in 408 BC, he screwed up a crucial line and literally sort of every writer for about 300 years ripped into him. Do we know the line? We do. Yes. So a lot of pressure here, Anna. If you fuck up a fucked up line, is it doing it right again?
2:40I don't know. But anyway, he was playing the part of Orestes and the line was supposed to be after the storm, I see once more calm. After the storm, I see calm once more. Okay. Instead, he said, after the storm, I see cum. I see. It's really similar. If it was in English, that would have been what it was. Oh, wow. But because it was in Greek, it was after the storm, I see a weasel once more.
3:05Andy Dawson:Oh, my God. And this, and in ancient Greek, and I didn't know this, ancient Greek was a tonal language like Chinese. And they're really similar. The words for weasel and the words for calm. And he just accidentally changed the tone a little bit at the last minute and the audience were absolutely killing themselves
3:21Anna Ptaszynski:over it it's weasely done weasely done yeah it's totally different brilliant there you go there are the classics there are the two classics um i think they were also in aristophanes definitely it's so funny you mentioned aristophanes oh is this not aristophanes no it wasn't but it was in euripides but then aristophanes wrote a play three years later where he quoted the weasel line this is how famous it was that's i guess because there wasn't a rich media landscape then so you know that show the laughter files with dennis dennis norton's narden yeah it was like
3:52Andy Dawson:he used to show like outtakes from tv shows but they don't do that anymore really they don't do
3:56Anna Ptaszynski:it anymore but that will hit a very specific section of the audience will suddenly have remembered dennis norton's the laughter files but there are loads of tv shows so there are loads of bloopers to put in the show and you can get an hour of them whereas in ancient greece there's one blooper and it just is on repeat for 300 years i know when i was a kid you used to get these videos of like when footballers mess up and they show like 101 fuck-ups for a football match
4:19Andy Dawson:but it was always the same ones like it was always the same like the goalkeeper throwing the ball into his own goal and you'd have famous in any kind of blooper things you'd have the famous ones that everyone at school would know about for a year like that video when so and so it was a better time in media i would say but you know what spoiled it it was when media companies started owning their own bloopers and then you'd watch a movie and at the end they put the bloopers in or something and you're like you're not supposed to be laughing at this we're supposed to be laughing at you yeah yeah and then animated ones started making their own fake bloopers and that really
4:54Anna Ptaszynski:winds up i actually love those oh come on that's pretty good the toy story bloopers where woody gets his line wrong that's really funny it's funny it's funny i think it's bad when it's a serious film like i wish christopher nolan would stop doing it at the end of all of his films like those interstellar bloopers that he put over the credits they really took me out of it wait he didn't no is that a joke yeah it's a joke i just i don't look i'm not familiar enough with no as a professional entertainer i was making a joke and i won't do it again just let me know afterwards i
5:20Andy Dawson:think there are what you could have said at the end of schindler's list those bloopers were terrible
5:23Anna Ptaszynski:that would have been funnier and that's why james is a professional professional yeah um can i do effect yes please this is a bit of a droppers a liney one but it's borderline so it refers to something that we actually did have in the show a few weeks ago right but i thought this was better here just i'm just showing my working before i dazzle you with the thing okay very niche knowledge required to understand this explanation tom mcclatchy tom mcclatchy thank you for this fact he says medium fun fact setting the expectations tom's a professional emailer i'm saying it mahatma gandhi could have met jack the ripper oh now this was about whether gandhi could have seen a wind turbine in his life.
6:01Andy Dawson:And also whether Jack the Ripper could have seen a wind turbine. And we worked out that both of those two people could have seen wind turbines. But what you're saying is that one of those people could have been the other person. I'm not saying anything. Hang on. That's a leap, but go on.
6:17Anna Ptaszynski:What a cover. I mean, what an incredible cover to be the most famous pacifist, the most peace and love person of all time.
6:23Andy Dawson:It would be the person you least expect, wouldn't it? If you were to list all like 10 billion people who have ever lived Who was most likely to be Jack the Ripper I think Gandhi would have been the last
6:34Anna Ptaszynski:But he'd just arrived How old was he? Young, very young I think it was a student, maybe he was about 19 years old Oh, so old enough to still do the murders Very much so Right, well Was Gandhi's whole career an act of atonement for I think so A killing spree A cover up, yeah It's got to be a cover up, there we go I think the months don't quite stack up But if we're saying he's clever enough to sort the months out, you know.
6:58Andy Dawson:Where did he study? Did he stay in India his whole life?
7:01Anna Ptaszynski:No, no, no. So this was, no, he was in London. He was in London. He was in London during 1888 when the murders were happening. He was here as a student and he was.
7:07Andy Dawson:Was he living in his student digs in Whitechapel?
7:09Anna Ptaszynski:He moved around a lot, actually. But everyone said he was a great neighbour and he kept himself to himself. Good. For the conspiracy theorists out there. What fun.
7:20Andy Dawson:Another documentary in the making.
7:21Anna Ptaszynski:Dan, if you're listening, that one's for you.
7:24Andy Dawson:Okay, here is one from me. Actually, it's from John Gray. And I just think we can't let these shows go past without a bit of extremely oblique football knowledge, which just seems to be a bit of a common thread. John writes that at the World Cup, Netherlands striker Justin Klivert missed his penalty on the 29th of June, 2026 against Morocco, hitting the left-hand post as he was looking at the goal. Don't need to tell you that, Andy. So it's World Cup, right? World Cup. Jesus. Do I have to go through every word in this sentence? No. Spookily, his father, Patrick Klivert, the very famous Netherlands footballer, also missed a penalty kick on the 29th of June.
8:09Andy Dawson:That was in 2000 against Italy at the European Championships, hitting exactly the same post. Dun, dun, dun. What, they're using the same goalposts? 26 years, aren't they? No, he missed it so badly, it ended up in America. No, hitting the left-hand post. So, yeah. Spooky with footballs for the O's. It's just, if you're doing an Oscar about this.
8:32Anna Ptaszynski:Get this woman a job doing that Google thing of the day. It's great. Thank you.
8:38Andy Dawson:How do you audition for that job? Well, you just have to picture him. I'm here. Yeah, yeah. I imagine the CVs look amazing that people send in for that job. Guys, have you ever done the game, by the way? you know when you can't find a web page and it shows you that little dragon thing
8:56Anna Ptaszynski:and you mentioned this the other day on this very show god I am such a boring person that not only have I done it but I've mentioned it twice moving on
9:04Andy Dawson:hi Anna we really liked your idea for the google doodle but we've actually done that for the last three weeks have you thought about just having each letter a different primary colour
9:19okay let's move on and this is from Susan Partington from New Zealand. I think I know why Andy included this one. She says, I'm currently reading Andrew Hunter Murray's marvellous new book, Bad Deeds. I don't recall that bit of the email. That's weird that you kept it in
9:35Andy Dawson:because it's not that relevant actually. It really puts into doubt the rest of the email for me. I feel like she's probably, what do you call those narrators? Unreliable. I think she's an unreliable narrator.
9:48Anna Ptaszynski:Well, you know who else is unreliable? Alex, the protagonist of Bad Deeds, I'll tell you that much. Look, she says, here's the link to Andy's book. Andy's book features a character called Jack Denver. Correct. I've read it. It does. He's either the villain or not the villain, depending on whether you finish it.
10:06Andy Dawson:Spoiler, very much alert. Once you've read the first 10 pages, you can say whatever happens with Jack Denver is probably going to be flipped around at the end. Wait. Yeah, but you don't know which way.
10:16Anna Ptaszynski:That's the biggest amount. That's an Anna Karenina level event. People are going to be sobbing at home. Their lives were building up to reading this book. Someone's on page 399. What was the point now? I left it open. I did the Schrodinger's cat. Is he alive or dead? I can't remember now. Anyway, her fact is the state capital of Colorado was named after Governor James Denver, hence the link, to curry favour with him, the governor of Colorado, as it was newly made. but he'd just resigned from office. It's just the news hadn't yet reached Colorado. So the reason Denver is called Denver was to curry favour with a bloke who was already out of the job at the time.
10:58That's very funny. Yeah, there you go.
10:59Anna Ptaszynski:Oh, I've got a choice of two American name facts. Which would you like? Oh, great. That's a good one. One or two. That's pretty good. All right. This is from Blake Hossack and it's sort of about sport and it's sort of about American names. Brilliant. So there is a new professional women's baseball league in the USA announced on the 8th of July, Independence Day, plus four. And they announced the names of their first four teams when they announced the league. The New York Heights, the Boston Hunters, the San Francisco Firebells and the Los Angeles Queens. Of these four teams in the league, two of them are named after a person with an appropriate name rather than a functional quality.
11:42Anna Ptaszynski:Really? The New York Heights are named for Dorothy Height Who was a basketball player It's baseball sadly I read it as basketball the first time Dorothy Height was a very prominent woman in the civil rights movement That's great And the Boston Hunters are named after Harriet Hunt Who was the first woman to apply to Harvard Medical School That's really good Lovely Two in one I know There you go, what a deal, what a great deal
12:05Andy Dawson:Yep Here's one from Skjalg Nimo Let's say that I absolutely nailed that because Skelg's not here to say that I didn't. But it is about Norway, and Skelg says that the Order of the Norwegian Lion was a Norwegian Order of Knighthood established by King Oscar II in 1904. Despite being a Norwegian order, not a single Norwegian ever received it. Love it. And that's basically because Norway and Sweden were kind of a joint country around that time, and all the people who received it were actually Swedes.
12:40Anna Ptaszynski:One Norwegian got it, that feels like very bad odds
Read the full transcript
12:43Andy Dawson:Yeah, the new king of Norway Harkon the 7th became Grandmaster of the Order but he was actually born in Denmark Oh dear Were Norway just quite crap at things for a time?
12:58Anna Ptaszynski:Do right in Or was there some kind of prejudice Probably some kind of inbuilt prejudice
13:04Andy Dawson:I think it was the fact that the Swedes were more of the upper upper ilk in those days. Right, okay. Because when you look on the Wikipedia of all the people who had it, they all have this weird sort of flag which is neither Sweden nor Norway. And it's kind of the Sweden-Norway joint country flag. Oh. And then you have to go and check every single one of them to make sure they were born in Sweden if you're doing your due diligence on this fact. How many were there? Oh, only about a dozen. Okay, not too bad. Didn't take up your week. The queen, the true queen of England. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. QE2 Yeah She was a knight of the elephant in Denmark The knight of the golden fleece in Spain The knight of the white eagle in Poland And the knight's grand cross At the order of the Netherlands lion In Netherlands
13:51Anna Ptaszynski:Wow
13:52Andy Dawson:They're pretty solid names aren't they Four times a knight
13:56Anna Ptaszynski:That was her nickname of course
14:02Andy Dawson:Can you still go to the Tower of London Even though she's not here anymore Probably you never see her wearing the knight's gear ever you didn't well you don't know because she's in
14:14Anna Ptaszynski:the you don't know that it's her if you see if you see a knight in full armor but carrying a corgi that would have been the queen i see okay so visor down i suppose you don't yeah never took
14:23Andy Dawson:a visor up if she because i went to um warwick castle a little while ago um where they have lots of stuff about zog the dragon and they had someone dressed as a knight there i don't know that wasn't the queen. No, you don't. You can suspect it wasn't. The late queen. It was before she died. Otherwise, that would be, you know, the zombie queen.
14:44Anna Ptaszynski:I told you, didn't I, about my visit to Walmer Castle in Kent. I'm sure you did, Andy. Which is one of the, it's where the warden of the Sink ports used to have their traditional place. Oh, yeah. Sink, not Sank. It looks like Sank for the five ports. Is that how you say it? But it said Sink. Anyway, they had a queen mum impersonator there. Queen mum died, I would say 25 years before my visit to Walmer Castle last year. And they had, it was so weird because she was not very good. Oh, really? She was just a slightly elderly lady in a floral dress.
15:15Andy Dawson:Do you think the job becomes easier as people forget what the Queen Mother was like because it's been quite a while since she died?
15:22Anna Ptaszynski:It probably does. It doesn't seem like it would, yeah. She had a kind of consort with her, a big guy who was not meant to be, I think, a king. I don't think so. It was just a guy in a suit. But I made some joke about Oh the Queen Mum You'll have started on the gins Won't you And she did not laugh Because the Queen Mum Did like a drink And she liked to laugh Well So she would have laughed Yeah yeah So it wasn't the real one You know that
15:43Andy Dawson:It wasn't the real one I suspect the real Queen Mum Wasn't at your castle And the real Queen Wasn't at yours actually I'm starting to think the same Don't you think it's weird That they've changed The pronunciation of that word To sink When In a poor One of the last things You want Of course
15:58Anna Ptaszynski:Very good point So they should change it back Is it just because
16:00Andy Dawson:they don't want it to sound French. It might have been, yeah, because it's a
16:04Anna Ptaszynski:Henry VIII era innovation, the sync ports, you know. It's Walmart and it's Deal and Sandwich, which were anti-French defence places. So that was the deal. You could use the word five, couldn't you? And that would solve all your sync problems. More than the five ports. Don't like it. Not the same ring. No. Okay, fair enough.
16:25Andy Dawson:Say big on your next project and Menards. Check out our huge selection of Richmond water heaters. Whether it's electric or gas, tank or tankless, Menards has what you need in stock. Ensure that you have hot water when you need it most with a new Richmond water heater from Menards. Plus, check out our weekly flyer on Menards.com for all the great deals happening now. Save big money at Menards. Save big on your next project at Menards. Check out our huge selection of Richmond water heaters. Whether it's electric or gas, tank or tankless, Menards has what you need in stock. Ensure that you have hot water when you need it most with a new Richmond water heater from Menards.
17:15Andy Dawson:Plus, check out our weekly flyer on menards.com for all the great deals happening now. Save big money at Menards. I think this is the best fact I've read this week from a listener. And this is from Leon Miller out. And it's about Kenyan cave elephants, which I can't believe I didn't know about. But he says, I just learned about Kenyan cave elephants, which seems so incredibly improbable. I'm very amused by their existence. And they indeed are. They're amazing. Do you guys know about these? Cave elephants. You almost certainly do, you QI veterans. Not sure. But they basically, they exist kind of on the border of Kenya and Uganda.
17:57I think there are only a few hundred left. And they excavate caves for themselves to find the salt inside the cave. So they get their tusks into the ground. They'll find a little hole, make it bigger and bigger. They usually access a big lava flow where there's like a big tunnel. And there's not live lava in it. They're not sailing down hot lava. And there are photos of elephants deep down inside the bowels of the earth. And they go there to lick the salt out of the caves. and it's because there's too much rainfall there which sweeps all the salts off the foliage off the ground on the surface so they need to find salt somewhere so they dig out their own caves
18:32Anna Ptaszynski:It sounds crazy It does sound a Dan Schreiber style did you know on the Ugandan border with Kenya there are these cave elephants It sounds too crazy to be true
18:41Andy Dawson:And who fought against salt in post-colonial India? Jack the Ripper I'm just trying to put all of the facts together Like Dan would do Tied up beautifully And it's almost time We tied this up actually
18:56Anna Ptaszynski:Oh is it? Can I give you a nice Brief one from Randy Bandarob Oh yes Always Excellent Randy writes My fact is The author Kurt Vonnegut Oh yeah Huge deal in sci-fi Slaughterhouse sank Slaughterhouse sank It's actually sink Kurt Vonnegut Opened up one of the first Saab dealerships In North America But it went bankrupt Within its first year So Saab, the Swedish car brand Just to bring it back to Scandinavia We had a Saab when I was young
19:29Andy Dawson:Is that the end of that, Alec?
19:30Anna Ptaszynski:It certainly is But we didn't buy it from Kurt Vonnegut Because we didn't live in West Barnstable
19:36Andy Dawson:It sounds like very few people bought it from Kurt Vonnegut
19:38Anna Ptaszynski:Well, Saab have stopped making cars now They've gone out of the car business And they're now in the business of supersonic uncrewed aircraft Submarines and anti-tank weapons They've pivoted very hard Towards high-end military Yeah. We had one of those when I was young.
19:55That's amazing. I didn't know that about stuff.
19:57Anna Ptaszynski:Yeah, they're really like they're properly high-end tech now. But at the time, they were not very cool when Kurt Vonnegut was trying to sell them in America. And part of the reason was, I just love this. It was a two-stroke and not a four-stroke engine. It was boring. But the point is, every time you filled your tank with petrol, you had to pour in a separate can full of oil as well. so that it mixed and stayed the right suspension. And obviously nobody wanted to do this because it was a complete pain in the bum to do. So nobody wanted a Saab and they went bust. I can imagine that being a selling point.
20:28Like those crisps where you used to have the little sachet of salt that came along with them. That was quite fun. Yeah, true. I can imagine it being a fun element.
20:35Andy Dawson:I disagree. My car has been telling me to put washer fluid into it for about 18 months now. And I keep thinking, because it's an electric car So I don't really go to petrol stations very often, which is where I would buy washer liquid from. Yeah. I just keep thinking, oh, I should buy some washer liquid. And I can imagine the same happening in this.
20:55Anna Ptaszynski:And you get your wife a lot fewer flowers now, don't you? Now you don't go to petrol stations anymore. You've just triggered a memory in me. I went to an electric car event day recently. Oh, yeah. And I met a bloke. I met a bloke. He made his own petrol at home.
21:10Andy Dawson:What? Was it like out of fish and chip oil? Because people do that, don't they?
21:14Anna Ptaszynski:Oh, maybe it was. I mean he had a recipe It is illegal
21:17Andy Dawson:No it's not illegal But you have to pay The equivalent amount Of fuel tax That you would have done If you'd have bought it From the petrol pump
21:24Anna Ptaszynski:No Yeah yeah I mean how many people Are doing that
21:27Andy Dawson:I imagine all of them People are going to the effort For getting old Chipped oil And putting it into their cars
21:36Anna Ptaszynski:Yeah but you have to Set up this whole mad thing In your garage or whatever And make your own petrol What a cool guy Basically refine it You know I mean Yeah it's nice to have a hobby And he's at the electric So that's That was in the old days He used to do this When he was I see Because you are using something You're upcycling something I suppose But then you've still got emissions
21:54Andy Dawson:He now makes his own Batteries out of battered sausages
22:00Andy Dawson:Okay On that lie Shall we move on to I prefer to call it a joke But you know I just Can imagine that As I'm in the front row Of the comedy store Lie Not true Fake news that's very sorry i forgot that i wasn't hosting this even so oh yes oh yeah on that note of a brilliant joke we should move on to the my favorite part of the show i would say which is where we hand out some of our facts to people on the top tier of our patreon if you want to get your own fact then go to patreon.com slash no such things as a face join on the top tier and we will make you a custodian. So who has got a fax to hand out?
22:44I've got one here and this is to go into the care of Hannah Duvall with two A's, a bit like Saab. So there you go. Just a coincidence.
22:54Anna Ptaszynski:Just binding James's hands for the edit process there. Lashing into the mast of the Kurt Vonnegut fax. Great.
23:02Andy Dawson:I kind of say to anyone listening, we very rarely cut fax from this because we record quite sharp. Well, you might have noticed as a listener. The quality is steeply declined. So this is one of my favourite facts I ever found, actually, is that houses in Bali are built in proportion to the owner's body. Do you remember this?
23:23Anna Ptaszynski:Did we all make the incredibly obvious joke? I suspect so, yes. Do you want to make the obvious joke again? Really long drainpipe or something. Really short drainpipe. Some sort of penisy joke. Yeah, a huge dining room. Yeah. And this was that you get measured before you get a house made, don't you? So if you want to build an extension, I think you also have to extend your own body in proportion, maybe. That's my... But if you want to remove the conservatory, you have to have yourself decapitated. Yeah.
23:54Andy Dawson:So it's a big decision. That is amazing, really. Yeah. You would be able to know, like you could walk into a town to visit your friend and you'd be able to know which house was theirs immediately, I guess.
24:05Anna Ptaszynski:Or if you're a cop looking for a very tall suspect. You know you go to the longhouse Anyway that's a great one, enjoy that Hannah Duvall Here's one that goes out to Millie Millie congratulations to you because your fact is According to Isaac Newton The world is going to end in 2060 So you've got 34 33 years to enjoy that fact Millie I'm sure you will Basically Isaac Newton came up with a load of old cobblers As well as the laws of physics
24:34Andy Dawson:There was a lot of old cobblers going around in those days, wasn't there, in fairness. Very true.
24:40Anna Ptaszynski:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:41Andy Dawson:Here is one that is now going out to Abigail Harris-Jones. And Abigail, your fact is that there is only a one in 800 ,000 chance that nobody will cough during this podcast recording. Even lower if I'm in it, according to James when he does the edit. Well, quite, yeah. Sorry, that's the noise I make, isn't it? That's the noise that you make probably every two and a half minutes. usually over someone's punchline in a joke. It's because I want to cover up the lies that are propagated by this show. But yeah, I think one of the ideas is that people cough more in theatres than they would in the rest of life because you're kind of suppressing it and you're holding it in and then eventually it just gets worse and worse and you have to let it out.
25:26Andy Dawson:I understand that.
25:27Anna Ptaszynski:I went to a classical concert the other day and there are these weird cough breaks in between movements where you're not meant to clap but you are meant to cough. Is that right? It's a bit of free time for everyone to just have a bit of a rummage around.
25:39Andy Dawson:Okay. Sorry. Would you not? I think I would cough during the big crescendo.
25:45Anna Ptaszynski:That's another very good way of doing it.
25:46Andy Dawson:Or I'd go da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Like that just so people didn't notice it because there was another bit at the same time. Yeah, that's great.
25:55Anna Ptaszynski:That's a great idea. That was really good. Yeah. Do you memorize the piece beforehand so that you know how to sing along and insert your cough in the right spot? Yeah, I do.
26:02Andy Dawson:you know that there's an app you can find where it's always the best time to go to the toilet in movies oh yeah i have that app but for operas and when's the best time to come that is genuinely
26:12Anna Ptaszynski:a good idea yeah well i mean not a good idea but i can see it being useful i can't i love it it's funny that classical music thing yeah because everyone does always cough and it's like they've
26:22Andy Dawson:all been saving it up it's the same when you go and watch snooker is it yeah because you can't cough when someone's about to play the shot but you know that some people in a crowd of 500 people let's say someone wants to cough when they're playing their shot and so as soon as there's a little break and they're just sort of the referees picking up the balls and putting it where it's supposed to go you do hear people just getting them all out at once and also the world championships is in the middle of spring when everyone just seems to get a cold in Sheffield I don't know why but my my memory is that that was the one time of year when everyone got colds maybe it's a pollen thing maybe it's hay fever here's another one this is the fact that the coliseum has recently banned centurions and this fact is to go to ria carna i think in the um fact as we've sent it to ria we probably should have removed the word recently given that it was about 10 years ago yeah i guess it's recent in the context of ancient rome exactly still recent yeah they're not in their heyday let's face it and they're not real ones right this is bad fake tourist centurions who try and
27:28Anna Ptaszynski:um strong arm literally uh uh tourists into taking photos for money and stuff like that yes or stage fights and things like that what they should have done instead of like
27:37Andy Dawson:banning them and getting the police to get rid of them they should have got lions
27:46Anna Ptaszynski:oh that's a really funny one um here's one that goes out to darren john congratulations darren because your fact is from 1978 to 1991, tens of thousands of chicken heads were dropped from helicopters over Switzerland. One of those facts, you cannot see which way it's going, you know? Tens of thousands of chicken heads and then helicopters and then Switzerland. Just a lovely, a real rollercoaster ride. These were vaccinated chicken heads, which were full of the vaccine against rabies with the hope that the foxes would eat the chicken heads and become immune to rabies.
28:23Andy Dawson:Okay, my next one is that in 2015, a 10-year study concluded that punching glass is very dangerous. Now that fact goes out to you, Sarah Williams, and you can keep it on your wall behind a pane of glass maybe. Really nice. Which no one will ever punch because they'll read the facts and know, aha, I shouldn't do that. Yeah, smart. So do you think everything that's framed on a wall should be that fact because otherwise you're in danger of punching it. I feel like I will now scribble that fact on every painting in the National Gallery. Nice. Everyone behind glass anyway just so that people know. Good idea.
29:03Andy Dawson:Yeah. Here's another one and this one is for Hilgar Thorarinsdottir and this is that the oldest turkey in the UK is called dinner. Pretty mean fact. Although it survived.
29:16Anna Ptaszynski:Well, I don't know if the turkey is still with us. I can't be. This was about 2017 we did this How long do turkeys live for? About 8 months normally I guess It just feels like the oldest anything When it's almost 10 years later It's no longer going to be a thing is it? One more? Alright last one This goes out to Beth Beth your fact is That Cary Grant and Clark Gable Used to meet once a year At Christmas to exchange Unwanted monogrammed gifts They had received of this fact of course classic fact Anna Tudjensky fact this was a Christmas show wasn't it of course that's why there's a turkey fact then I remember we did this show either up the creek I think it was up the creek and this was a fact that was sent in by someone who went on to and employ as a researcher in fact really yeah it was by Lauren was it shout out to Lauren Gilbert oh sorry I thought you meant Beth who was receiving the fact was yeah she doesn't know it yet that was her fact and it came from her and now it's back to her and she's become a friend of the podcast I got very confused yeah yeah Yeah, I don't know why you thought that.
30:19Anna Ptaszynski:Because I wasn't listening. Beth, don't quit your job. If you're listening now and you've already sent your resignation letter. Beth, we'll see you next Monday, sharp 9am at the QI offices. Welcome aboard.
30:31Andy Dawson:Who would you swap your monogram gifts with? AM. AM rather than AHM. I think AHM would be too difficult. Andy Murray? Yeah, well, you could then swap not just monograms, but like personalised.
30:44Anna Ptaszynski:Yeah, the whole thing. Where do you get your, what, I suppose just school clothes with your names? stitched him. We'll swap school pullovers. That'll be great. Yeah. No, A.M. Oh, I don't know. Andrew Mountbatten. Andrew Mountbatten. Oh, great. I think I'll put those on a hot wash if we're swapping anything. Oh, dear.
31:07Andy Dawson:Oh, dear. James? I couldn't think of anyone myself, which was why I asked you to. J.H. The only person I can think of was Joanne Harris. Did she write Chocolat? She did write Chocolat. Yeah. I'll take that. Yeah, that's good. She probably gets lots of nice gifts. Is she still alive? Oh, yes.
31:24Anna Ptaszynski:Very much so.
31:24Andy Dawson:She'll get loads of chocolate, actually. She's not bad. Although, can you monogram chocolate? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Like an Easter egg with J.H. written on it. Brilliant. Perfect. Oh, I'm jealous. And she can get my monogram golf balls.
31:38Anna Ptaszynski:It's not a great swap, Joanne. And then AP could be... Comedian Andy Parsons. Yes. Lovely. what kind of stuff do we think Andy Parsons gets? So no, he's got a goatee, hasn't he? So like a goatee comb? A goatee comb, yeah. Maybe some jokes. Maybe you get some joke suggestions I could do with them. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
31:58Andy Dawson:Okay. That is the end of the show. Thank you so much, everyone, for writing in with your facts to podcast.qi.com. And thank you very much indeed to Beth, Helga, Sarah, Darren, Ria Abigail Millie and Hannah thank you so much for becoming friends of the podcast and like I say if you go to patreon.com slash no six things a fish you too can get your own fact that is it for today thank you very much to Andrew Hunter Murray
32:28Anna Ptaszynski:thank you
32:29Andy Dawson:thank you Anna would you like to do a quick cough yeah okay thank you and it's also goodbye from me goodbye
32:49Andy Dawson:We'll see you next time.
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From the publisher
Anna gives a huge spoiler to one of Andy's novels, while they and James discuss YOUR facts. This week's subjects include Google, bloopers, Kenyan elephants and Kurt Vonnegut. And the gang announce eight more Friend of the Podcast custodians.
Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes.
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Edited by James Harkin
Produced by Leying Lee
Team includes Tara Dorrell, Joe Mayo and Ethan Ruparelia
