Ari Emanuel ON: How to Silence the Doubt in Your Mind & Strategies for Transforming your Career

27:50And we kind of get it in 95 on my birthday, March 29th, we let loose. So, and that was the catalyst to say, life's not a dress rehearsal. You better get to what you want to get to. And that kind of thesis is at the 20-year mark changing how I look at life. And am I still going to be that angry guy? And, you know, all the different routes we all take in our lives to get to where the end is. Yeah. Did you try and change certain aspects of the culture based on that statement that you built, or did you find that? I just wanted to treat people well, you know, inside, and share clients and communicate better.

28:34And there was a guy by the name of Phil Raskin, the first employee. And they fired him. In the Israeli army, you don't let anybody stay. You know, you go get the bodies. So I said, you're hired. Now, we had no money. We were not making any money. And I said, we're hiring you if they're firing you. And how we treat people was kind of the crucial thing different about how we did things. I think one of them. And I think it's progressed. I don't know if it's perfect now. You'll have to ask the guys running the agency right now. But I think overall, I hope people feel that way. What was it like building something from scratch when there wasn't any money?

29:16because I feel like it's easy to look at you now and ever, you know, it's. Well, there was two years. Yeah. No salary because you're out on your own. Well, we were being, we were in a tussle with ICM over commissions and because we couldn't take the commissions because they said they deserved it because we're in a contract, this whole like, and they were going to sue us for certain things. And so we had no money. I mean, we knew things we had money, but a lot of stuff was old stuff. About a year and a half, two years in, we settled. I might be getting dates wrong, but right around then. And then we had money.

29:51And in that period of time, the world changed. Mike Ovis left the business who was the god and Ron Meyer, Bill Haber. And then Gavin Pallone left this company, UTA. And a lot of shifting happened. And we had put on, we had taken a couple people from CA, Marty Ailman, And we put on a bunch of TV shows that were successful. And we had money because of those, because they were going into syndication and packages. And so it was like free agency and baseball. We have money and people are like shifting. What are they doing? And we were home. We got, you know, with just timing. And we were in the right place at the right time.

30:31What was the hardest thing you had to do in those two years? You just had to work, you know, with no money. Just putting the time. Just putting the time. And you were doing 17-hour, 18-hour days. Wife was pregnant at the time, my ex-wife, with our eldest. And keep on building and how are we going to do it? And, you know, the five of us, I think, Marty had joined. And then two and a half years in, Patrick Weitzel had joined. And just kind of how we keep on progressing and doing it. Like, none of us had ever done it before. We were all, as my father would say in Yiddish, we were all pishers, you know, small nothings.

31:09And so we just figured it out. But, you know, it wasn't like, oh, we went from no money to, uh. Yeah, of course. It was nothing. And we were happy. Yeah. We were really happy because we were, in our own heads, it was successful. And it was hard, but we had fun. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. I couldn't be more excited to share something truly special with all you tea lovers out there. And even if you don't love tea, if you love refreshing, rejuvenating, refueling sodas that are good for you, listen to this. Radhi and I poured our hearts into creating Juni sparkling tea with adaptogens for you because we believe in nurturing your body and with every sip, you'll experience calmness of mind, a refreshing vitality and a burst of brightness to your day.

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32:40So visit drinkjuni.com today to elevate your wellness journey and use code ONPURPOSE to receive 15 % off your first order. That's drinkjuni.com. And make sure you use the code ONPURPOSE. yeah while i was a student and before i ever started doing things online i i used to do events in my local area in london and like 10 people would show up every week to hear me speak about spirituality psychology human behavior and i loved it i did it for 10 years before so he's saying you you went to school to possibly be a banker yeah and then what what not that this we're going to reverse the interview what was the transition to like oh i don't want to do this what happened in your mind or our life event so i think life event that i met a monk and i'd never met a before at school so they they would come and we'd have speakers come in whether it be ceos or athletes or celebrities or former alumni or whatever it may be and one day a monk was invited to speak at at a small college session and some of my friends were getting a business session no no no not a business just a general like yeah and i was invited to go because some of my friends were getting into meditation at the time.

33:52This is early, like we're talking about like 2006, 2007. So we were doing that and it was, and my friends were kind of getting into that space. So they were telling me to come along. And I was like, yeah, I'll go if we go to a bar afterwards. Like that's the kind of guy I was growing up. And so I went along - And you weren't married at design? No, no, I'm 18 years old. I'm 18 years old. I'm, you know, I had to start college around that time. And so I go to this event and I hear this monk speak and I'm kind of there going, okay, when are we going to leave? Like, who cares about this stuff? How does this benefit my life?

34:21And I actually walked away feeling completely just reflective because this monk was saying that the greatest gift was to use your skills in the service of others. Like he was saying that whatever you've been given, that was his main theme to improve other people's lives. And it was like, I'd never heard that from anyone before at 18. And I realized that when I was 18, I'd met people who were rich and famous and beautiful. And you thought that was a stack. Yeah, but I was like, this guy seems happy. He seems content. He has something that - At what point in the lecture did that like hit you? Because at one point you're saying, let's go get some beers.

34:55Yeah, at the beginning I was kind of like, okay, what is he going to say when he came out? And you know, he's dressed in robes and he was from India and like, you know, I'm a kid in London. Like, you know, there's nothing externally attractive about him. And then as he spoke, like as I actually listened to him, I was just mesmerized. And so I said to him, I just want to follow you around. So I ended up following him around for the rest of that week. He was doing events in London, homes and different things. and then at temples. And then I started visiting him in my summer and Christmas vacations in India.

35:24Wow. And then when I graduated from college, I went and actually lived with him as a monk for three years in India and the UK. And what did your parents say? They were like completely like scared and worried. What's going on with our skin? Yeah, and all of our friends and family, he's been brainwashed. It was like, it's really interesting because I'll talk to this about perception. It's really interesting because everyone now is kind of like, oh Jay, you're just, you know, this is a good story. And I'm like, dude, when I chose to become a monk, it was not a good story. People thought it was the dumbest idea of all time.

35:53Like it was like career suicide. This poor kid, what happened? Like what happened to this kid who got a first class honors degree at university, straight A's, you know, like what is going on here? And all of a sudden I'm taking this path. Your parents must have freaked out. My parents freaked out. And my extended family freaked out even more, which made my parents freak out more. They came from India? Correct. Yeah. So that upbringing and that. going back that way. Oh my God. Yeah, exactly. So, and, but I felt called. I started listening to my inner voice when I was 14 years old and it's been so loud ever since.

36:25I don't know any other way to go. And so for me, it was so, so loud. And so that was the shift in my trajectory where. So you come out after three years. I hoped I'd do it forever. And that I really thought I was going to do it for the rest of my life. It did not work out. And so what was, why? A couple of things. One thing was like, it's super tough on your health to live communally. Like when you're living potentially sometimes with 30 people in a room, a hundred people in a room, people wake up at different times. You're being woken up by everyone. The common cold, you're sharing baths, showers, like, you know, like the spaces, like everything's communal in that space.

36:56It's hard on my, it was hard on my immune system to live in that way. Of course, I'm a kid from London. Like I didn't grow up with lots of comforts, but it was definitely more comfortable than a monastery. And then on top of all of that, I just had this honest transparency. And that's what monk teachings are meant to do. It's meant to make you self-aware. And my self-awareness was, I'm quite independent. I'm quite a rebel. Like I like doing things my way. And I feel - This is not that. This is not that. I feel like I want to share what I've learned in this cool, accessible, relevant way. Where the world is.

37:26Yeah, where the world is, which is the world I come from. And if I stay here, then I'm actually going to be pretending to be someone I'm not. And so it's like, I'm going to go back and, you know, be myself. That's a big thought. It was, it was. And I had no idea what that meant then, but I just know that it was loud and that it was real and that - It had to happen. It had to happen. It was, you know, I think it's funny. Your brother said this about you. He said that, he said this in his book, Brothers Manual, the speed, danger, and risk that make other people nervous make guys like Ari serene.

37:57And I want to dive into that with you. But for me, that's what it was that - You didn't know where it was, but you knew you had to be on that road. Yes. And I don't know how to - stop myself. I can't pretend to myself is where I've always been. Like I have to be all of myself and I'm, and when decisions are against the grain and no one agrees, chances are I'm on the right path. And so even when I came back, then I had the opposite where everyone around me was like, you wasted three years. Look at everyone around you. They've got jobs now. What are they saying now? Yeah. Well, I mean, obviously it changes now, but obviously it changes now, but it's anyway.

38:34Isn't it unbelievable? I had this, I sent this email out to the company. You know, most people think success is this. That's success. And that you just, it's your journey. Yeah. And it just, you don't know where it's still going, but it's probably going to go this way and then it's going to go that, you know. Yeah. How have you had the courage, going back on that same point, how have you had the courage to be open to speed, danger, and risk when other people thought, especially what I think we don't recognize is as you become more successful, So as you make bigger decisions, it's not that just more doors open.

39:07Sometimes there's even more doubt because now people are like, can he, can he get the next one? Right? Most people don't want to risk it all. Correct. Once you get to something like, why would I risk that? Correct. Like why do that? You're, it's going to be on a perfect glide path. Yeah. So I've said this before in certain interviews. I don't remember exactly which one. When you're in a class and you're figuring out where to sit in the class because you think you've psychologically figured out if I sit here, the teacher won't call on you to read, and you're so anxious, and you're so nervous, and you're so afraid.

39:39It's not like I don't get anxious about big deals. I mean, I got really sick doing the UFC deal. Moving to London, not great for four months when we took over, right? Yeah, so what? I'm not nervous about those things. I don't know why. It's just my upbringing, seeing things I went through that I could get over. So working hard, doing all the things, showing up, getting on that plane for the lunch in China and then flying back after the lunch, that's kind of how I operate my life. I don't know what my mom fed me or did and my dad, but yeah, I'm not worried about the hard work, and all of it takes hard work, as you know, and I'm not trying to prove to anybody what, I'm not letting their definition of success, not success, what I should do, what I shouldn't do, dictate what I want to do like you.

40:40I got my own ideas about what I want to do. I just keep on following them. Hopefully I keep on getting in tune with my voices, definitely listening to people in my life that I trust. But then, you know, it's like, okay, it's time to bet. Like we just did with WWE and doing something new and here's what we're going to do. Yeah, those are not easy decisions. Yeah, it's really interesting because even... But I'm very comfortable in the uncomfortable. I'm really comfortable in the uncomfortable. I think when most people don't like uncomfortable conversations, don't like to be uncomfortable in business, don't like that, I do enjoy that a lot.

41:19I like awkward. I'm comfortable in awkward. I like just saying what it is. I do not care. you can like me not like me i was never one of the cool guys i'm good i think it was so funny because mike milken was sitting in your seat yesterday just here and and it was interesting because there's this shared experience of there's a healed sense of self-worth but then there's this embracing our own insignificance like you just said you're like we're i'm also insignificant and it's really interesting because everyone who's kind of has a settled mind. I'm not sure people get to the second one. But we need to.

42:01Oh, why do you think we don't get there? Sometimes what we need most is a pause, a moment of clarity that helps us breathe a little deeper, listen a little closer and feel a little lighter. On TikTok, those moments are actually happening every day. Creators share daily habits that people find helpful, personal insights that help them understand their own journeys and reflections that have brought them perspective when life feels overwhelming. You'll also find people opening up with honesty, about healing, about growth, about finding balance in their lives. And in that honesty, we're reminded we're not alone because one story of resilience can ripple into thousands of others.

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44:04Learn more about APU's 40 plus career relevant master's degrees and certificates at apu.apus.edu. APU, built for the hustle. I've had this conversation with many people, this concept of legacy. And once you actually believe it, not just say it. I mean, presidents have legacies, I guess. Some entertainers have legacies. Sports stars have legacies. Business people, no, they don't have legacies. And once you get to that point and comfortable in that point, this whole concept that what's my legacy, which is a jerk off conversation. You can move past a lot of this stuff. We're sitting there, what's my legacy?

44:53Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a bad question, I agree. It's a bad question. That's why you're doing it? Yeah, I agree. Oh my God, that's crazy. Yeah, do you know what? I think it comes from, I think we never get to embrace our own insignificance because we're scared of where it leads to low self-esteem. So there's that angle. Definitely, I don't have that. Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the deeper angle, which is what you're raising, is that I think as humans, we're so addicted to immortality because at least from a spiritual point of view, our consciousness and energy is immortal. And there's such an addiction to immortality and longevity that we have that for us to live after we die, we think the only way - So here's my thought process about that.

45:32Because people, because I mean, I am a crazy health nut. Yeah. I mean, I do some crazy stuff. Yeah. And I'm into it too. I'm really, really crazy. But for me, it's not about living forever. It's about being healthy while I live. Same. Agreed. As long as I am, because I see people that are older that are prisoners in their bodies as when they get to their 60s, 70s, 80s. I'm not doing that. The best thing that could happen is it's over would be incredible. And you die in your sleep. Like it's over. but until that point in time i'm playing golf i'm going on hikes i'm surfing i'm doing my thing this whole thing about this whole world of um and i hack yeah i hack myself to do that but it's not to live to ever and so that's the objective yes yeah no i get that and i and i'm totally aligned with that i feel the same way like i don't think it's what's the craziest thing you do for your health i mean i i've been recent because i'm still young there's certain things that people don't recommend yet.

46:36And so like, I've been talking to people about like stem cell treatments and things like that. I don't know if you've done any stem cell therapy or anything like that, but okay. So I haven't done any of it either, but everyone's always like, yeah, you're too young to start these types of things right now. But I'd say the craziest thing I do right now is same as you, like the fasting, the cold plunging, the infrared saunas, the deep rest and sleep, the meditation has been a part of my life for 17, 18 years. You got to push steel. Yeah. Yes. You got to do weights. I had to stop that last year for a, I had surgery, so I had to stop.

47:04But yes, I usually do weight training. You have to do that. You have to do stuff for your kind of CO2, your oxygen, your ability. How old are you now? 35. Yeah. So you're right at the, right if you do now, right? Yeah, this is the time, yeah. You got to reduce as much as you can your inflammation. You got to have gut health. Yes, this is exactly it. And then you have to figure out how to balance your glucose. If you can do those things, you have 35 % chance of getting to the objective of one night, you just don't wake up yeah right are you plant-based as well or you you try here's what it is because i'm 62 yeah okay wow so i was a lectin-free vegan following dr gundry's who got me when i had my thyroid problem really healthy the problem is now because i do push a lot of steel i do do heavy cardio i do do a lot of that stuff i have to have some protein in my diet so i I have moved up to probably very healthy, you know, grass-fed, grass-finish, no corn in it, all the stuff that causes inflammation.

48:05I have moved up into probably three or four days of meat and then the rest lectin-free vegan. Yeah. What's the craziest therapy you've done? You mentioned earlier there was some different shrinks. Well, I do, you know, I take helmets from Thailand and from the UK every morning. I do light therapy every morning after the cold plunge. I mean, if I showed you the list now, you'd be like, all right, you've lost the plot, Ari. No, I love it. That's what you look like. Here's what happens, though. As I go down all these paths, I always call my brother Zeke. Yep. And I only have the following question.

48:44And then he has to do the work. And I do work, too. I said, okay, can it kill me? Can it injure me or hurt me? If the answer comes back no, I do it. So I started on, you know, they're live microbes. They're microscopic. You can't see them. I drink them every morning now. I've gotten to a place where I do that. I worked with this guy from Duke as I read an article about him. And people were like, what are you doing? And I say the great line to them as they watch their facial expression. I said, well, they don't colonize in your system. And, you know, you can see them like. And so this goes to like, all right, I'm not, I'm just going to try these things as long as it can't hurt me.

49:26The list is vast. Yeah, yeah. It's great. No, it's great. I think it's, I mean, this is where, this is where the world's heading. And I think everyone's looking for solutions and looking for ways. So I love hearing about it from you. And it's, and it's great. And it shows, right? I feel like you, you seem really vibrant, energetic. And, and I think that's the key, right? It's vitality. I think. Well, the back is not turned into a mouse that's hunched over. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. absolutely have you ever seen those absolutely that that that that scares me yeah yeah yeah i will do anything not to because then it's not you're going to be a prisoner in your body yeah yeah that's that's that's that's that's not that's not where you want to be in life yeah talking about athletic bodies you you talked about what you did with the wwe there i remember when you first got involved with the ufc yeah there was a lot of like doubt as to how big it could get i believe there was a bit of skepticism how do you how do you when you're making a decision that's big money big risk and danger going back to that point but then everyone else is like oh it's a lot of risk this is like don't know if it's going to work out but then you're like no i i know where this is going to go how do you how have you found that the first thing that i mean the first thing that i do i mean i'm assuming you do it anybody's successful do it i read a lot yeah and i i i ask a lot of questions to once i read an article if i understand it don't standard i want i call the person or i call the person in the article and that happened early on how we started the firm like we know we were in the representation business and then i said we have all this business i want to buy something that we own i thought sports was going someplace that with increased distribution it was going to be more valuable and so it was like there's not many sports you can own i was already in business with ufc we did all the work about where we could take the economics internationally sponsored it was an easy bet and it worked out well it's well the world changed on me at the time for the like fox sold to disney so those two buyers out down trump wouldn't let at &t buy time warner so those two buyers are out and the rest of the they didn't nobody else wanted it at the time because they had already had too much so it was nerve wracking for a while.

51:32But then the world changed. Yeah. It's fascinating to me because I think that everyone in their micro universe or any universe is always having to make tough decisions that a lot of people around them don't understand. Whether someone listening to this right now is trying to start a new health regime, whether someone's - So there's not a pill. Yeah. In anything we do, as we now know, there's not like, because I don't know about you, people come to me. So what's the one thing? One thing. There is no one thing. I do 17 things. And it's grown from 10. Yep. I don't like being asked the one thing at all.

52:06It doesn't work. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why the questions I'm asking you, I'm fascinated by the thought process. Well, you're just, in our lives, we're just gathering information, gathering thought process, gathering perspectives, and then we go hunting for things that we want to do and where we think the world's going. And then once you get to that point, like, okay, you talk to a lot of people. You have to, for me, talk to investors, et cetera. And then you're, then you're launched. And then there's, I think, I might get this story wrong. Disney, when they bought Cap Cities, which had ESPN, they valued ESPN at zero at the time.

52:48And when it came out, it was the most valuable asset. Again, success, right? Who knows? Yeah. You know, you can do all the work you can do. And then all of a sudden, get into the pool. The water's warm, dude. You got to start swimming. Yeah. And that's what I think. I think there is so much pressure around making the right decision as opposed to making your decision right. Right? Like, as in you, I think a lot of people spend a lot of time going, is this the right decision? Is this the right thing to invest in? I'm like, well, make the decision and then make it right. It's just the way we started it.

53:18How many people can handle change and fear the, I mean, you just have to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. Yeah. Yeah. absolutely what have you seen you've worked with talent i know you still do in in in some intimate ways i work a lot of talent okay you still do all right i've heard you say well i was like i was thinking there's most of but you're working with the business as well as much as yeah yeah exactly so when you're working with talent what have you seen has been the because i think it was interesting i was saying when i was young everyone wanted to be an investment banker now we know in america most people want to be influencers creators some something to youtube or what what have you seen have been the best choices that talent have made long term for their successful careers or where are some of the mistakes people?

54:03I think most talent now realizes they're the ass and it's kind of moving towards them. And a lot of them are starting to try and figure out like, okay, what does that mean? Can I own other businesses? Can I get equity? Whether it be Ryan Reynolds, Dwayne Johnson, Mark Wahlberg, these people, right? And I think that's been at that level. So we're going to go through a whole iteration right now with AI that is going to, I think, I don't know what it's going to do, but it's going to transfer one more time our business, I think in a good way, in that I think people are going to have more free time than ever.

54:41They're going to want movies. They're going to want entertainment. They're going to need more. I think we're going to go down to a permanent four-day work week. Governments are going to need it for full employment. And that means the weekend is starting on Thursday night. and that means that's three days where people need personal interaction and so the value proposition especially as distribution changes you're going to go to six wi-fi you're now seeing more distribution rumble picking up shows i mean it's just expanding and expanding our job is to create a place where our talent can create really for the first time even more exponentially become their own brands and own businesses and do things that they, not just a movie, not just to tell other things and we'll be successful for them and they'll be successful as long as we can create this kind of perfect architecture.

55:32And we're not perfect at it yet, but we're getting better at it. And those are the clients that we want to be in business across podcast, all the different things. Um, and that's the hardest thing that we're trying to build now in this transition, but that's where I think the world is going. We all want to live with more purpose More connection and more joy Sometimes that starts with a small piece of wisdom A perspective shift, a grounding practice Or a story that makes you feel less alone On TikTok, those moments are being shared every single day Millions are finding people who show meditation techniques Discuss the science of the mind Or share daily habits that many find helpful Others are opening up about their own journeys Talking about well-being, resilience and healing in ways that can make you feel seen And what stands out is the way it's shared Ideas spread quickly and support can grow from a single post And it all happens in a welcoming and supportive space TikTok stimulates your mind in more ways than one It's a place for learning, for mindfulness, for tools that support healthier habits and reflections If you're searching for growth and connection that resonates with your own unique journey, you'll find it on TikTok.

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58:44You're going to have, and you know, you have COVID. That's almost a four-day work week now because people don't go into the office on Fridays. That means Thursday night, what are you doing? Yeah. Well, I'm in the entertainment. That's the objective. And so that's what we've been building, like events, Madrid Open, Barrett Jackson, art show, et cetera. And that's where I think the world's gone, sporting events, et cetera. So I think entertainment's going to become more valuable than it's ever become. I don't think it will be as disrupted by AI. There will be some disruption in it. Yeah, it's incredible to think about that because, yeah, I think people are only looking for more alternatives and options, especially for that human connection point you were talking about.

59:28How have you found it as a leader to have that where you've gone from everyone being in an office in an agency to then people working from home? Like, how have you navigated that to continue that, like, creativity? Well, listen, we have, you know, we had done this a long time ago. We had just restarted. We did a book club, not the way we used to do, with Rick Rubin on his new book. We do, we had a lecture on antisemitism. We were trying to get people in groups talking about big issues to kind of keep the company together from, you know, we're in, I don't know, 37 countries so that people get to, there's a communal and they were going to start a big retreat again which we hadn't done in a lot of years because of covid so that's the way we foresee doing that yeah yeah absolutely yeah and i think that that's that just keeps hopefully yeah and we just have to keep on working on how we keep that connection um ongoing in the company yeah you know because you do want if the architecture right you do want the licensing group talking to the motion picture group talking to the online on location group to create an experience.

1:00:34And you want all those pieces and, and the outside world and the clients is asking for it too. So that's where we have to. Yeah. I worked with so many organizations before and during mainly the pandemic and then even after. And the transitions I've seen are incredible because whether a company was growing rapidly. So I was working with Zoom, they were having the best success as a company financially, but it was like they had to scale, like what was a small organization really quickly. And so like the burnout that comes with that is really, really hard. And then you had other organizations, obviously like travel entertainment, live entertainment.

1:01:09Down, struggling with that and handling morale. And so it's really interesting to see how they both bounce back because it was hard either way. And it's really fast. You always think, oh, they're successful. They don't, it's hard. Success is hard. I promise you it's hard for them now. Yeah, of course it is. Of course it is. It's so complicated. It's really complicated now. Success is hard and failure is hard. Running a business. I don't, any one of them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Brutal. Yeah. What have been some of your, what would you say the last few years has been one of like your biggest misses or your biggest failures that you look back and go, that taught me a lot?

1:01:43Well, I'll say the following, because it was a success. And it was only success because I thought we had to like shut everything down. And Dana White at the OC said to me, uh-uh, we're not shutting down. I got scared. And he like slapped me across the face. I said, no, we're going. and then he said, get me an island. And, you know, I was like, you know, my brother's a doctor. He's telling me where the world's going. I'm like, and he was like, mm-mm. And he was just driving that train. And so we got him an island, and he did everything else. And, you know, kind of just remind me, like, yeah, it's nerve-wracking, but don't be scared.

1:02:21Yeah. And he was, like, amazing. Yeah. And I was, like, on the other side of that fence. And I said, you know, and that's why I have a great partner. He's an incredible partner. But I, for the first time, got really scared. And he just said, no, we just have to go. And we're going to take all the heat for it. And it was a lot of heat against him. But we did it. If we didn't have that, the whole company would have been tanked. Because we needed the ESPN deal to continue to go. We needed to put on fights. And his courage, like dragging me along, was incredible. The industry today, I feel like cancel culture, heat culture, like it's got, it's got harder basically because there's more people to cancel.

1:03:00There's more things that people are sensitive or care about or believe in and values. Like how do, how do you as a talent agent think about artists going through that? Because I'm sure you've seen over the years, just, so I coach a lot of people in the music business, actors, like sports people. I coach so many people in the industry. Don't jump in the water because most people want to respond. The news cycle is so fast. unless you've committed murder and something, whatever, let it go. The thought process is I got to jump in and respond. Then it just, the story just continues. The new cycle, I used to say it's like one day.

1:03:39It's less than a half a day now. And if you just get out of this emotional mindset that you have to respond and they have to know, really? Nobody's even like, it's over. Don't respond. and that's kind of, I think, the hardest thing for any artist. Yeah. How have you worked with, because I'm guessing you almost, by job, have to become a coach sometimes to the people you work with. No, this is my line of, like, why are you responding? Yeah. Don't. Like, they want you to respond because then they keep on getting the click. Yeah. Thank God I'm not on social media. Yeah. I won't do it. I won't. I mean, I get it, you know.

1:04:16Yeah, yeah. Sometimes my kids send it to me. Yeah, yeah. My wife sends it to me. I don't look at it. what's something that you're trying to immerse into your children like I mean you were just your son was just calling you're just talking like what's something that you feel you really want them to know and learn at the stages they are in their life I just hope I think they get it it was so funny my youngest son is now training he goes to Michigan he's working up at Apple right now at Apple Maps and he's decided comes out of his he's going into his junior year he's training for a triathlon a junior what i loved about him is he did the work and what i mean by did the work and it was like shocking hearing i was just such a proud father he talked about how you run better and how the people in kenya run better because they're on their toes and he'd done all this research about and he started doing it first three weeks was brutal on his legs but he's gotten faster on the bike yeah i have to do it in a box dad here's what and i ride and do epoxy training and all stuff and i said you're right it does and he has not stopped training you know he's 21 years old you know i remember how i was at 21 years old i wouldn't have been doing that but his work about how to get better he swam double the length this time he's got a month left and just the amount of work he's put into it the thought process behind it the research he did i'm like i mean you couldn't be prouder.

1:05:45And all of them, I just try and teach them one thing. You got to work hard and you got to show up. The results you're not going to control. If you do those things, and there's many other things that we all can list, but those are kind of it. You work really hard, you show up, outcomes you can't control. That's what you want. Good advice. I love that. It's, Ari, it's been such a joy talking to you today. Thank you. You've been, you've been such a, like, it's been such a treat just like i feel like we've been playing tennis uh or pickleball uh yeah yeah yeah and it's uh i was gonna say i need a pair of those i will just send one of those you'll send me the shoe size and everything yeah i want one of those too they look great wear it on the podcast so she gets a little i will have a little bit of kind of love from you i those are awesome yeah and i love new balance too so that's a great there are multiple colors okay i'm gonna actually have these in in in shoes too now okay well i'm gonna send them all you yeah i want it i want it all they look great they look great it looks it looks great on you too thank you for doing this i will but we end every show with the final five these have to be answered in one word or one sentence maximum so it's super tight it's the fast five i better sit up for this yes ari these are your final five the first question is what is the best advice you've ever heard or received know when you're on the field the second question is what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received I don't know if it was advice, but why would you do that?

1:07:09Interesting. Third question. What's something that you're trying to unlearn? Being angry. That sounds hard. It's hard. How hard is it? Let's talk about that for a second. You know, I'll tell you what it is. It's, you know, I know when it pops up, like all of a sudden, when somebody used to call me stupid in school, it was game on. And that thesis where somebody treats me as if I'm not smart or they're trying to pull something on me, I just go to a very dark, sick place. And I've worked very hard now not to go there to handle it differently. Not that I'm not going to be like, what, you think I'm stupid?

1:07:54Like by doing that, you're, you're acting as if I don't know what's going on here. And so, um, and they're pulling one over me and for whatever reason, the minute I feel like somebody's trying to. Yeah. Take advantage of you. Yeah. I get that. And so that is a lot of work. That is a constant work. And when I feel it coming on, okay, that's your shadow, whatever the phrase is, that's your, you know, that's the work I have to do. And I don't always do it. Especially those childhood ones. And so when somebody in business does that to me, recently I kind of like, I went to the bad place. I couldn't control it.

1:08:33And that's what I'm trying to work on. Yeah. What's been helping you work on that? It's just kind of like recognizing it. Once I recognize it, I can breathe through it and I can get to the other side of it. But in the moment sometimes. Yeah. Thanks for sharing that. I feel like, for me as well, I feel like your partners and your family often see the worst of you. And I always look at that almost like, how, what does my wife see? And the problem is you do things that are so not smart. Yeah. And it's, you know, it's, it's just not good. Yeah. And then you regret it afterwards. I'm not sure I regret it, but it's just like, really?

1:09:09You had to do that? You're 62. You had to do that? Yeah. You had to say that. You had to like make calls and try and kill you. No, I'm not doing that. Yeah. All right. Two more questions. The fourth question is, what's something that you used to value that you no longer value? Well, I thought it was about the stack. Now, maybe somebody's going to say, he's got the stack now. Yeah. But I never had, I didn't have the stack at the beginning. And I didn't, I mean, I don't, that was never the end game. What is the end game now? I am really happily married. I love my kids. They're in great shape. I'm comfortable in who I am I'm happy that I have to constantly work at it now and I'm actually in a good place to work at I understand the work I have to do which makes it even better all right fifth and final question we ask this to every guest these are longer than one sentence I know because you keep giving good answers you keep giving good answers I can't help it you gave a really interesting answer I was like if I don't dive into this my audience is going to get mad at me They're going to be like, Jay, why didn't you?

1:10:14I listened to my, this is what they're saying in the conversation. I love you to listen to your voice. Yeah, they're telling me. They're like, Jay, he just told you something amazing. Why didn't you? Fifth and final question. If you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be? It could be anything about any type of law. Don't be hypocritical if your whole thing is stay out of my life. Okay, stay out of my life on guns, stay out of my life on COVID. Just stay consistent. and that's the hardest thing because there's the shade of gray right i just want consistency without like the issue of money the affirmative action issue is you know oh it's sports and and legacy people or family you know kind of heritage that got into the school well that's about money like oh yeah the sports make them money and the the people that went there and their kids that they give a lot of money like okay we all get it like just stay consistent with when we decide to pass a law like that it is then across the board and the money doesn't get into and all those other things that that's the thing i just look at these i just look at these things i'm like the hypocrisy of of oh and i'm i'm hypocrite all of us yeah i am hypocrite i understand it i wish that we could figure out a law of that consistency whatever we decide so that it's like okay if if if really what you're saying here and we take it out across all these other issues here's what it would mean and so everybody gets i don't know what that law would be no the essence of the answer is great i love the idea of being consistent and removing hypocrisy and the challenges we and money yeah and we all have it like we all like we'll fight to death for this thing and then but actually you don't please don't say all my apocryphal things that i have done on air right so we all have well thank you very much all right thank you so much i love thank you i'm glad and i love Well, I'm going to send you these.

1:12:04I better get a case. We're going to send you a whole case. Thank you, Ari. If you love this episode, you'll love my interview with Dr. Gabor Mate on understanding your trauma and how to heal emotional wounds to start moving on from the past. Everything in nature grows only where it's vulnerable. So a tree doesn't grow where it's hard and thick, does it? It grows where it's soft and green and vulnerable. Hey, audiobook lovers. I'm Cal Penn. I'm Ed Helms. Ed and I are inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with our new podcast, Earsay, the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club.

1:12:38Each week, we sit down with your favorite iHeart podcast hosts and some very special guests to discuss the latest and greatest audiobooks from Audible. Listen to Earsay on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Follow Earsay and start listening on the free iHeart radio app today. This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.