Tom Hanks: #1 Theory Tom Uses in Order to Live a Balanced and Fulfilled Life

30:13And church was a place you could look back on work and home and reconcile and reflect and think about - You can ponder why bad things happen to good people and vice versa. Yeah. Correct. It was a place spent, literally meant for that. This is why you come here. Exactly. And now what's happened is, let alone three spaces, we don't eat, we just have one. So we work from home, we live at home, and then our third space or the closest thing to it is a television, probably. There isn't a separate space. And so it's arguing the fact that there isn't that space almost to have those thoughts, conversations, ideas, insights that may arise.

30:49Parking shouldn't slow you down. Park Whiz gives every driver a shortcut. Book ahead, save up to 50 % and skip the hassle of circling the block. Park smarter, park faster. Park Whiz. Download the Park Whiz app today and save every time you park. I'm Radhi Dvlukia and I'm the host of a Really Good Cry podcast and I have the opportunity to talk to Logan Ury. Logan is a dating expert, a behavioral scientist, a best-selling author and someone who is seriously changing the way we think about love and dating. In our conversation, we talk all things dating, that Logan has studied and tested from what to put in your dating profile, the pictures you should and shouldn't be using to the conversation starters that actually work.

31:28And the huge no-nos that people probably do not realize are reducing their chances of success on apps. Whether you're single, dating, or just trying to be more intentional in love, Logan offers the kind of clarity we all need. Relationships do require work and the best relationships are people who really work on them together. They're so focused on if I find the perfect person, then I'll have the perfect relationship instead of understanding really that they can choose someone great and then build that relationship together. They don't need to keep searching for perfection. Listen to A Really Good Cry on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

32:05Have you ever looked at a piece of abstract art or music or poetry and thought, that's just a bunch of pretentious nonsense? Well, that's exactly what two bored Australian soldiers set out to prove during World War II. when they pulled off what was either a bold literary hoax or a grand poetic experiment, publishing over a dozen intentionally bad but highly acclaimed works of expressionist poetry under the name Earn Malley in an incident that caused a media firestorm and even a criminal trial. The Earn Malley episode made fools of believers and critics alike and still fascinates poetry lovers to this day.

32:40We break down the truth, the lies, and the poetry in between on Hoax, a new podcast hosted by me, Lizzie Logan. And me, Dana Schwartz. Every episode, Hoax explores an audacious fraud or ruse from history, from forged artworks to the original fake news, to try and answer why we believe. Listen to Hoax on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The generational thing, I think, is wickedly important. Whether or not, you know, like, they don't, you know, sometimes it's just the old person that's sitting in the corner, you know. But other times it's like, you know, a big, there is some aspect of the big family that is not for everybody, you know, because God knows not everybody wants to come to Thanksgiving sometimes because they don't want to have that same fight again.

33:26I had a friend who he had, his grandmother was like, already had a nine, like she was 93 or something like that. And she was always just there, you know, just there. and at one point he was uh he was arguing with his parents about not wanting to do something i can't remember what it was didn't matter but everybody was saying why are you doing that why do you what's that about how can you do how can you da da da blah blah blah and my friend said wow hey man because life's too short and this 90 year old grandmother is just sitting there And she said, no, life's not short. Life is long. Which I interpret it as being life is long.

34:10So if you're doing something stupid, you know, you're spending a lot of time relishing, you know, living inside that stupidity. Yes. And my kids, my youngest kids, essentially were raised along by us as well as a couple of people that have, you know, been employee-like families for members of family, but also their grandparents. Their yaya and papu, as they say in Greek. People who were never not engaged with them when they were babysitting. We never had to have babysitters. We never had to have a nanny. We didn't have anything like that. What we had instead was two generations removed of people speaking Greek to them, asking them questions, what are you doing, from the moment they are toddlers until they're 14 years old.

35:04What they got from that is so different from what I got from mine. There is a joke in my family about how bad I am with tools. I mean, as soon as I pick up a screwdriver or a hammer, I start getting cold sweats. Because my dad had no patience with me about, he never said, let me show you how to use it. Let me show you how to scrape that off. It was always, oh, come on, you knothead. Don't you know how to sand a board? Don't you know the difference between a standard socket wrench and a metric? And I never did because nobody said, let me show you how you do this. You got to learn it. So that you're talking about something there that is, it's almost, it's like water on a stone, you know, it just has an effect over time.

35:53And, you know, for in many cultures, you have to look at that and say, the more, the more generations around that table with regularity, you know, not just for, you know, three holidays, three holidays a year. the richer the lesson is going to be, you know, the deeper, because you're going to pick up some stuff just by, like an old story from, you know, from the old country. My father-in-law, dad, he was Greek but grew up in Bulgaria and had escaped the communists and whatnot, which is a fascinating story unto itself. But when he told the story about being told by his dad, to take the donkey up to this, you know, up to the mountains and get something and bring it back, knowing that there was the meanest dog on the planet Earth up there that was going to try to bite him.

36:52He came back. Oh, I think what it was is he said, take the donkey up there. And he didn't want to wrestle with the donkey. He just wanted to go up there and get it back really fast. And on the way there, this dog, you know, nearly mauled him, scared the living daylights out of him so when he came back down his dad said i told you to take the donkey because the donkey would scare off the dog you know like that so you know you don't that's the kind of stuff you got to pick up over time yeah but did you did you have uh multiple multiple generations in the home as you were growing up i i felt that for me my my monk teachers became that for me because they were older and so sure i had a monk teachers in his probably 60s when i met him, I had another who was in his thirties when I first met him.

37:37And so they became that. I wasn't so close to my grandparents. And so I didn't really have that same interaction as you as mentioning your children did. I didn't really have that with them. So I had my parents, I had my uncles and aunts, but then I think it was really later on when I met those two generations in the monastery that, that really expanded my, uh, breadth of, you know, human experience. It'd be nice if it worked across the board, but sometimes, you know, grandpa's a drunk and, you know, and grandma does nothing but smoke cigarettes and, you know, and watch Wheel of Fortune. So maybe it's not always great.

38:10No, maybe it's not always great. But it can be sometimes. It can be, it can be. You were talking about your experience with your father and, you know, with the tools. And it's so funny because my dad was the opposite. He was useless at DIY. And so I'm useless at DIY. Oh, there you go. And so I have that experience. My dad was great. My dad could fix everything. There was a story I was talking to my older brother. He and my dad, my dad was like, why in the world are we spending a lot of money? For crying out loud, we could get it. We could get an electronics kit and make our own amplifier. We don't have to go off and pay all this much money.

38:41We'll hook it up to a turntable and a speaker. There we have stereo systems. So they got a kit, and I saw them working on it together, and I was kind of jealous. And honestly, 40 years later, I said to him, you know, when you made the amplifier with dad, I was really jealous because, oh, man, I wish I would have done anything to trade places with you. My dad was so miserable as we were doing it always. You knothead, don't you know how to solder? It's like, oh. So, you know, it's a perspective of everything. Yeah, definitely. Did you try to parent differently? Like, did you try to avoid something?

39:13You know, you try to, but I made every mistake, you know. You scar the kids somehow in the same exact way. And as they get older, you know, you come back around. I said, hey, can I talk about what a knothead I was with you for all those years? And I said, yeah, sure, dad. Yeah, been kind of waiting for this. Why don't you unload? So, no, but I would say at the same time I think there was, you know, does it come up to be 50-50 maybe? The attitude and the, you know, the life that we led, the laughs, you know, that stuff's worth its weight and, you know, gem-encrusted gold. What's something that they've taught you?

39:54What's something that they've inspired you? How different they all are, you know? They are not the same type of human being ever. My youngest at one point said something that was definitely true for him. And I thought is in fact true for all of my kids, which makes me feel good. And that was, he was younger. He was like seven or eight. I said, oh, you know, at one point, let's go down. We were in New York. Let's go down to the park and we'll take our gloves. We'll throw it around. We'll bat the balls. Let's just find a place of grass. He said, okay, do that. And it got away from me. Didn't happen.

40:31This called that something happened. And I realized that, oh, the sun's going down now. And I said, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Hey, I'm sorry. I said we were going to go down and throw the ball around. It got away from me. Forgive me. And he said, no, it's okay, Dad. And he sounded disappointed. That's okay. I said, well, you know, I feel bad. I don't want you to be bored. And he looked at me with a look on his face and said, Dad, I'm never bored. And that is, that's curiosity. That speaks to curiosity and drive and also the comfort of where one is in order to feel free, in order to explore whatever world that is.

41:10And I think I could say that maybe in varying degrees for all the kids. Their ability to pursue their own interests without being prodded, without being forced to. I've learned from that because, look, there was that isolation that I was talking about. There was a time when I was so comfortable doing absolutely nothing. or, you know, pursuing some brand of, you know, disconnection that wasn't good for me. And I, you know, they, everybody has it in some, some, some degrees, but you could be of a, with all that you have, with all you kids, with all your advantages, I do not want to hear that you're bored.

42:01And they have never, they have never said that they're bored. They've, they have always had some action thing that was going on, whether I understood their passion for it or not. Hey everyone, it's Jay Shetty and I'm thrilled to announce my podcast tour. For the first time ever, you can see my On Purpose podcast live and in person. Join me in a city near you for meaningful, insightful conversations with surprise guests. It could be a celebrity, top wellness expert, or a CEO or business leader. We'll dive into experiences designed to inspire growth, spark learning, and build real connections. I can't wait to see you there.

42:40Tickets are on sale now. Head to jshetty.me and get yours today. I couldn't be more excited to share something truly special with all you tea lovers out there. And even if you don't love tea, if you love refreshing, rejuvenating, refueling sodas that are good for you, listen to this. Radhi and I poured our hearts into creating Juni sparkling tea with adaptogens for you because we believe in nurturing your body and with every sip, you'll experience calmness of mind, a refreshing vitality and a burst of brightness to your day. Juni is infused with adaptogens that are amazing natural substances that act like superheroes for your body to help you adapt to stress and find balance in your busy life.

43:25Our Super 5 blend of these powerful ingredients include green tea, ashwagandha, acerola cherry and lion's mane mushroom, and these may help boost your metabolism, give you a natural kick of caffeine, combat stress, pack your body with antioxidants and stimulate brain function. Even better, Juni has zero sugar and only five calories per can. We believe in nurturing and energizing your body while enjoying a truly delicious and refreshing drink. So visit drinkjuni.com today to elevate your wellness journey and use code ONPURPOSE to receive 15 % off your first order. That's drinkjuni.com. And make sure you use the code ONPURPOSE.

44:12What attracted that isolation and disconnection at that moment in time? What was it that was so appealing about it? I think I just had to get used to it because I was number three. People ran out of time, you know? They didn't have the wherewithal, the interest. Because I was so young when my parents split up and there were so many other factors that had to go into, man, it was logistics and legal thing and time and distance and stuff like that. That I took care of myself and, you know, was satisfied. I think it was reprieve for them. So I just got used to occupying myself by being alone. Yeah.

44:49And that's really great. And it can be really detrimental. Yeah. I can relate to so much of that as well. I felt I was the eldest, just one of two. And my parents, you've used this word previously in other interviews of having your parents had a fractured relationship and so did mine. And so there was definitely a sense of I had to build independence, accountability and responsibility very early on because I had to take care of things. and I also look back at that as such a strength and I'm so grateful for it in a kind of weird way because I feel like it made me grow up earlier not in a way that I felt I lost a childhood or I didn't have amazing experiences but I'm really happy now when I look back that it gave me strength and courage much earlier but as the older one did they have some expectations of responsibility put on you did like where are you going and you have to be back by now were there rules placed no rules no rules for me, more expectations educationally.

45:49And what was strange, which is so much linked to what I do today. And I've, I've drawn that line fairly often for myself is I was emotionally depended on by both of them. So I became the therapist. Wow. Wow. That's a burden. I'm sorry. No wonder you went off for three years to sleep on the floor, sleep on the ground. Yeah, yeah. So I'm grateful for it now, though, because I think it gave me the ability to listen closely, be empathetic, understand both sides, care for both. Like, it gave me that ability to recognize how it takes two to tango. I think this is a viable study about where you are in that pecking order.

46:27Every now and then I read about it because because I was last and last by like five years, I had no rules. I had no expectations. They had spent so much time trying to establish that with the older, you know, my older siblings. They didn't want to bother with it anymore. So if I was gone for, you know, like two weeks, I just didn't come home for two weeks in high school. They knew I was sleeping at somebody's house and doing my homework and getting to school on my own. They were thrilled that they didn't have to, you know, they didn't have to discipline me or punish me. They didn't even have to think about me.

46:59I just came and went by myself. But I was not the oldest, you know. I did not have somebody that was establishing the rules and, you know, the structure of the family. Yeah, that was different for me too. I had expectations academically, which is normal in an Indian family, but there weren't any rules for me as well. So if I was out and about and doing whatever it was, it didn't matter. So I'm going to, is the stereotype of the Indian family, are you all brilliant students? Do you all work really hard and finish all your homework? You're forced to, yeah. You're forced to. You're forced to prioritize homework.

47:35Education is all that matters. Your social skills, life, relationships don't matter. It's all about how well you perform. I'm glad I'm not an Indian and there's no way I could have been. Oh, Lord. Yeah, it's all about how well you perform academically. Your whole life revolves around that. Were your parents like high academic achievement? Well, I think they did. I would say they did very well for what they had. So my dad became a chartered accountant. He qualified in England, but he grew up, he was raised in India. And my mom never did any more than what you'd study up until age 16. Okay. And then after that, also became an entrepreneur and became a financial advisor.

48:10So they'd both struggled and worked hard to - I love it. It was going right where I thought it was until you said, and then became an entrepreneur. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, which I didn't realize growing up that she was an entrepreneur. Well, that comes from somewhere of that structure of education and homework done, even no matter the gender. Exactly. Okay. Exactly, exactly, definitely. But I was thinking about, as we're talking about your life, I can't help but think about the movie here. I'm so grateful I got to watch a couple of days ago, a couple of weeks, no, a week ago now. And I really just felt that it was a work of art.

48:46That's kind of what I took away from it. It was a work of art. Because rarely, as a film more recently, had me so fixated on, first of all, the way it's produced and created is beautiful. It's a pretty deep throw. It's so deep and it's perfect for this conversation that we're having. And even as you're reflecting on all of these scenes in your life, to me, I can't help but project. Oh, dear. Oh, but because it was the four of us, you know, Bob Zemeckis and Eric Roth and Robin and I and everybody else in it, you know, Paul and every other actor in it. We, the scenes are very, very specific of a moment in a family's life.

49:29Yes. And everybody was armed for bear. Everybody had a thing that had happened to them that was like that, not necessarily example, but the sensory experience, the emotional connection. to every single moment in this thing was really quite resonant for us all. And I had to, when I, people would say, what are you working on? Oh, I'm making a movie called Here. I say, not H-E-A-R. It's H-E-R-E. They said, well, what's it about? I've said, it is about how important things are when they happen here, you know, because you cannot control them and And they are, if you, the film, I mean, all of the permutations where it goes, you know, we say, oh, the camera stands still in space, but it moves in time, you know.

50:22Everybody, every character in it is going through that profound thing that happens in a specific moment in their life. And where does it happen? It happens right here. So we were always talking about presence, you know, some big aspect of it. And also that we do not know that we're living in a moment of history. We don't know. They don't know the first tribes, you know, the Native Americans. They don't know that they're Native Americans. They're just living in the moment. They don't know they're living, you know, 600 years ago. Nor do the people that build the house that takes place. They don't know that they're living in 1911.

51:03They're just living in the right now of it. And that's a type of thing that really is so examinable in a very specific type of cinema that is the point of what the whole movie is that, you know, that Bob and Eric fleshed out long before Robin and I came along. Yeah. And along with that comes together, the four of us have a history that we can go back to. I mean, Robin's worked with Bob a couple of times. I've worked with Bob a number of times. Eric is one friend of mine. We've worked on stuff all the time. And every time we've done it, we have a pinpoint of the difference between here, at the moment that it happened, and now, at this moment where we're talking about establishing a whole new other place in time.

51:55Yeah, I mean, when I was watching it, I couldn't help but think of every place that has been monumental in my life and then think about how many other events must have taken place in that room, in that space that I'm not even aware of. And I might even take for granted and not recognize the value of both in my life and previously and, of course, the future as well. Well, I had to wrap my head around this thing that I had never experienced. we lived here i've never lived any place you know i i you know now now i've now now i've had i've had in the same literally home as in three-dimensional structure in time and space i've had that now for you know a couple of decades here but this idea of someone putting so much i don't want to say importance but having so much emotional centeredness in literally this place in room by these stairs through this door.

52:56The TV used to be there and there it was there. Here's where mom and dad did this. Here's where I did that. I don't have that. I got it, you know, once we got married and, you know, finally I did, but I didn't get it until I was 35 years old. And my kids have it. And sometimes I have to ask them about their perspectives. I moved around so much as a kid. I looked forward to it. When we moved out of the house that my kids had been born in and lived in for the better part, you know, lived in for like 14 years apiece, they were sort of undone by it. And I didn't understand it. I literally, in the back of my head, if not verbally, said, what's the big deal?

53:42You know, how's that for a perspective? It is a huge deal if you're actually there. And Richard, you know, Robin and I are characters, you know. I'm born in the house. I grow up in the house. My kids are born in the house. Our entire marriage and family is spent in that house. And is it a solace or is it a boundary that you're never able to get through of? Experiencing that and examining that was, oh my Lord. I can't tell you how much conversation. This whole movie was just one big-ass conversation about what it means, not so much about what the words are, how we move around. That's the technical stuff that goes along.

54:24But every moment that we were off by ourselves, it seemed to me we were trying to weigh this very specific thing of what we have all been through in our odd, celebrated, goofy, stupid individual lives and what it meant to this, the H-E-R-E aspect of this story that we were trying to tell. And Bob particularly, I mean, Bob's, we all, I think, incorporated our own approach to our art form and commercial life to it. Bob is a filmmaker, is not about to do a shot that anybody could do, you know, and he's not about to tell a story cinematically in ways that have been done before. He's just built that way.

55:10He went, well, hell, anybody can do that. You know, he says stuff like that. And Eric, as a screenwriter, he's constantly landing on this place where only his words on paper can. Parking shouldn't slow you down. ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut. Book ahead. Save up to 50 percent and skip the hassle of circling the block. Park smarter. Park faster. ParkWiz. Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park. The risks they took would be unthinkable to any doctor today, but odds are someone you know is alive because of them. Welcome to the Wild West of American Medicine. I'm Chris Pine, and this is Cardiac Cowboys, a podcast that tells the gripping true story behind the birth of open-heart surgery and the maverick surgeons who made it happen.

56:02It changed the way we live. It changed the life expectancy of people throughout the world. I should be dead. The repair that he did when I was six years old saved me. A ragtag group of surgeons united by a common mission. Some appeared on the cover of Time magazine, operated on kings and advised presidents. Others ended up disgraced, penniless, convicted of felonies. Together, they ignited a revolution in medicine. It's as if a man landed on the moon and nobody even told the story. except this is more important. Listen to the Cardiac Cowboys podcast starting February 6th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

56:45Hey guys, it's AZ Fudd. You may know me as a gold medalist. You may know me as an NCAA national champion and recent most outstanding player. You may even know me as a people's princess, but now you're also going to know me as your favorite host. Every week on my new podcast, Fudd Around and Find Out, I'll give you an inside look at everything happening in my crazy life as I try to balance it all. From my travels across the globe to preparing for another run at the Natty with my Yukon Huskies to just trying to make it to my midterms on time. You'll get the inside scoop on everything. I'll be talking to some special guests about pop culture, basketball, and what it's like to be a professional athlete on and off the court.

57:23You'll even get to have some fun with the FUD family. So if you follow me on social media or watch me on TV, you may think you know me. But this show is the only place where you can really fut around and find out. Listen to Futter Around and Find Out, a production of iHeart Women's Sports in partnership with Unanimous Media on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Translate this thought process. And Robin and I, you know, Paul, everybody in the thing is like, I know the lines turn me loose. Let's go. Let's go. What are you going to do? Are you going to try that let's try that where are you going to just take it you know this ongoing game of uh improvisational emotional football in which you just and i mean football is the international sense yes premiership the championships league it is a ball that is kind it's a matter of entrance it's a matter of a curve it's a matter of being in the right place at the right time in order to to receive what's given to you and then pass on to somebody else yeah it was uh i know the film uses digital anti-aging technology and you get to see yourself many years younger.

58:32Was there any special feeling of that? No, it was kind of great. I mean, because it's a great tool. Because it's been, you know, people are aged and younged up in movies, you know, since Edison stole George Melies' film process back in the early 1900s. It was fascinating to watch because it ended up being the tools were so much better that it was a different completeness to it. Absolutely. You know, we all had, you know, you always have hair and makeup. We went through extensive everything. You know, they did what they had at one point. I'm sitting there and Jennifer, our fabulous makeup artist, she's just looking at me.

59:12She just grabbed both of my ears and then lifted them up and shoved them into the top of my head. And I said, what are you doing? He said, oh, Tom, we're working on you being 17. And as you age, your ears grow and lower on your head. And so I'm trying to see if I'll be able to glue them up. I said, have at it, girl. so that all of the tool aspect of it is standard what was new is that we could see it in real time we didn't have to send it off and wait for a long post-production thing because that was the deep fake technology that uses some form of ai just to make it much much faster yeah and immediate and listen what what it one of the things that it shows is just how old i am uh because you know you got to have posture and energy.

1:00:10And if everything else about you looks like you're 22 years old, you're going to have to embody a 22-year-old. I'm going to tell you right now, it's very hard to leap off a couch in enthusiasm as a 67-year-old guy at the time that we did it. I didn't even think of that. Hey, you know what? Had a lot of tea, had a lot of protein bars, got a lot of rest, got a lot of stretching in order to make that happen. Yeah, you mentioned presence there, and that was a theme that definitely struck me. What do you find helps you be the most present today as you're living? There are times that I think you have to be oblivious.

1:00:48You have to sort of like enforce it. You have to not think of things. It's crazy, but one of the most basic things I think that I learned, probably in junior college, when I actually, for the Shabot Community College, when he truly did begin to study this kind of stuff is that the words, what you are saying has to be so familiar to you that you don't think about it. And that is a degree of being oblivious to the specifics of what you're doing. Because if you're trying to get through it, that means self-consciousness. That means you are not getting out of yourself and self-consciousness is the death of performance.

1:01:31Ask any actor this thing. If you have a scene where you have to go to a deep emotional place and the only way to do it is to go there, chances are you have had the most wonderful day of your life prior to that. or it is so much fun to come to work that day. All right? So that's one thing that you have to do. And the other side of it is if you have to be charming and convivial and funny on paper, on stage a day, chances are you're going through some personal hell, you know, off camera, that you just have to be oblivious to somehow. And along with that, there's, I can't discount enough, the joy of the hang.

1:02:15I think what I do for a living, joy does, it promotes it. And joy not necessarily being we're all having a great time, we're all singing campfire songs, but the joy of allying yourself with great collaborators and trusting that they are going to get better stuff out of you that you could possibly bring yourself and being open to just knowing it so well. Everybody says, well, what do you mean by learning the lines? I mean, learning the lines like you know the lyrics to the best song you ever heard in your life. Yesterday, all my troubles seem so far away. Now I need a place that's here to stay.

1:02:55Oh, I believe in you. You got to be able to rattle it off that fast, that easily. It's got to be so much a part of you that you don't have to think about it. If I actually sang the right words to yesterday. Yeah, no, that makes a lot of sense. And I feel there's this, it's amazing to see your enthusiasm, excitement, joy, you know, continuing in your career when you're even what you just said now of working with people who can get even more out of me. And that belief that there's more in you always. You've talked about imposter syndrome in the past, which obviously I'm sure everyone, when they look at you, find it hard to believe.

1:03:31But I recognize when you've shared or I've heard you talk about it before, it's very real. It's very genuine, this feeling of like, oh, well, you know, walk us through that, how you've been able to constantly believe there's more in you to give, more to do, more to find. Somebody wanted me to do a movie, all right? And it was great. And I should have done it. It was going to be for a lot of money. It would be, and you go somewhere cool. You get a good per diem, you know, all that kind of stuff. There was no reason not to do the movie, except there was something that I just said, this is not the match for me.

1:04:13Because number one, I don't have any curiosity about the subject. Now, that's not the only reason to do it. But in order to translate the theme of the movie through a performance, there has to be some sort of challenge and curiosity. to it and i had none that was one thing but the other part of the two i was searching i was i was having a one-on-one uh talk with the director and i was just i said look i said i don't i don't have the i don't have the um I don't have the countenance. and the director said countenance the hell does that mean i said there is a thing that we all carry with us we have a countenance that comes from everything we've said all the work that we've done all the all the times that we've either succeeded or failed because they both go together you failure teaches you a lot more than success does i'm talking about commercial success but That idea that you walk away from a job and you think that we went to a new place in order to examine this theme that only we could have done unless we all got together and challenged each other and made it happen.

1:05:24And without that type of stretching of one's countenance that you come into, that to me is the big magilla. I still find myself completely at the mercy of that instinctive moment of saying, oh, my God, that's what I think. And the next thing you know, you want to do it and you're talking about it continuously. And there is nothing that anybody says that detracts from that initial experience. experience uh because you know other other you know that there's there's plenty of things that you can do um uh because they're fun i mean my my uh my beginnings uh the first time i was a professional actor we were in repertory theater uh at uh with my vincent dowling at a place called the great lake shakespeare festival in cleveland ohio and because we were in rep we did everything We did Hamlet and King John and Othello.

1:06:29At the same time, we were doing fabulous rip-roaring comedies that everybody dug. The countenance then is exchanged between the two. And that's something that it's not a burden at all, but it is a prism through which a decision has to be made. Going back again to this idea of this. I believe that my countenance, look it up, staff, look up countenance for me. My countenance is not going to aid the examination of this theme. And movies work when the theme is worthy of being examined by that movie. And so in that case, you just have to say, no, you need somebody that's going to come in there like a, you know, like, like a, like a mad dog and, and devour that bone.

1:07:26And I just, by countenance doesn't match up to that. Yeah. It sounds like you've never compromised that. Oh, I've compromised plenty of time. You know, making mistakes, you know, there was a period of time, look, look at my IMDB. It might be up in triple digits by now, you know, and it was a time where I just said, they are asking me to be in a movie. You don't say no to that. And that's young, that's the stuff that you do in your twenties and in your thirties. And then sometime in there, you start thinking about no no no no wait a minute wait a minute wait a minute the greatest decision by the way i don't think i've ever said no yet except by schedule but now it turns out to be that's where you start shaping um what your your art and the body of work you have to start the power is saying no and that's really that was really hard to do when you know everybody thinks you're great you show up and everybody wants you to do it and everybody says fabulous things but i I've compromised, I didn't know I was compromising because I didn't know any better.

1:08:22But there was a moment, I guess, when you said like, you know, I don't, I don't want to, I don't want to, I think I'd be compromising somewhere here. And so the first time I said no to something, it was a very, it was, it was on one hand liberating. And of course, I might've thought I made the biggest mistake of my life. You know, if you take any great, take any great magnificent, take, let's just pull from the take, Faye Dunaway and Laurence Olivier. They have very specific countenances. There is a thing that you will say, oh, my God, the countenance of Laurence Olivier. Really, really. Ozzie Davis.

1:09:01Well, you know, any great that, wow, that countenance matches. Yes. And that's, I guess that's what I'm talking about. There is like a, you know, some sort of cosmic weight that they carry along with it that makes sense for what they're doing. Yeah, for sure. There's a, listening to you speak about, I mean, it's so relieving to hear that you've compromised sometimes, like, because it's a relief. Come by my house, we'll have a night of compromise, you know. How about that? You want to do that? We'll bring the DVDs and say, this is the DVD of compromise. I mean, that would be amazing. No, I think because I think we're so good.

1:09:38We forget that you're used to celebrating and counting someone's wins and hits when they've had so many and you look over the compromises or whatever it may have been. And so it's a relief hearing that because your values of how you pick a project, of how you work on a project seems so strong and defined now. And that's obviously come with time. As you were making here, was there a particular scene that reminded you of a time in your life that you want to revisit, relive, rethink? Eugene O 'Neill wrote Our Wilderness. He wrote that play as the life he wanted to have. He wished he had had, the family that he had wished he had.

1:10:24And I always read that. Eugene only is a big reason why I became an actor because I saw great productions of his stuff back in 1975, 76. And when I finally saw All Wilderness, I was knocked out because it was as delightful a play as it was. And I'd always heard that he wrote that as, you know, the family that he wished he had. I thought about that when I was doing Here because there are moments, for example, when we're just sitting watching TV. and you know Robin is there the kids are little and we're just there and we ended up talking about what would be on the TV you know and I went right back to you know I don't know it's a Dean Martin show or you know an episode or something even down to some of the commercials that we wanted to and those moments were transporting for me but not in a home the way we were picturing it I remember seeing those in an apartment that we lived in for two and a half years when I was walking to school by myself.

1:11:29Or the first years, you know, somebody was married to a step spouse that was not the most benevolent human being in the planet Earth, right? But sometimes I remembered sometimes just that gathering around like-mindedly getting the same thing out of a TV show, like an electric fireplace. But it was solace. It was a togetherness that belied what was really going on in the house. And there's a couple of those, particularly when the kids are little and Robin and I are in early years of our marriages, that were sublime. right then and there because we're laughing. It's there. The kids are being goofy.

1:12:16There's a moment that comes along. And I don't think there's a better example of a true sense of family and home and connection in moments that are not Thanksgiving or Christmas morning or a wedding or a kid. They are when you're just sitting around on a Thursday night, you know, content and happy. and nothing is happening except the sense of presence that's there. There's a couple of them. It's funny that you should ask that because I realize now that the amount of suggestions we all had for how we would sit there, what would be on the TV, what we had done just before, was coming right out of our individual lives, from Bob, from Eric, certainly from Robin and myself.

1:13:03Yeah, it felt so real. It feels so real. every scene, every conversation, every event feels so real. One of the things that we learned, because it's shot in this very specific, you know, aspect ratio, you know, camera position, is that everything works. Everything. If you're in the scene, even if you're not talking, you are registering in a way that warrants attention. The stuff that is on the walls, I can't say enough about the TV. Here's something goofy, I walked onto the set one day and it was from a period from, you know, early 1960s or something like that. And the TV was an old General Electric TV that was the same model we had when Apollo 8 flew around the moon.

1:13:55We had, this was the TV. We had this old black and white thing with General Electric and had this big channel changing knob on the side. It was like that. And it was the same maple cabinet. It wasn't big. It was just not much, you know, it was on legs and it had the cloth speaker. It said General Electric and things like that. And I immediately took a picture of it and I sent it to my siblings. And I said, you recognize this? And they all said, hey, that's a TV from the Johnson house, you know? It was like that. So it had these kind of like talismans that came along with it. Oddly enough, they were both great to see and bittersweet to remember.

1:14:32Does that make sense? Yeah, for sure, for sure. I know you're fascinated by space. Do you have any desire to go to the moon? Oh, you know, if they were going to do a thing where, you know, regular blokes could just go up and go around it, I mean, I'd take that. You would? Oh, yeah, just to do it. But, oh, yeah, I think it would be. I'm sure Elon Musk would love to take it. Oh, I'm not going with him, but he's not going there anyway. You know, they're just going up now. But I've met, I've talked to the crews that are in line to make the next orbit around the moon that could happen as early as 25, 26.

1:15:08And man, oh man, I just say, hey, if you need someone just to clean up and crack jokes, you got room in there, give me a call. I'll get down to whatever weight requirements are necessary because I wouldn't pass it up. But I said, but only if all of the windows are clear. Because a lot of times they have gone up and the windows get kind of like messed up because of zero gravity and the vacuum outside and the building material. Right. Was that fascination only from movies? Is that where it came from? No, no, that came from, I was right smack dab. I was that educatable generation for which it was, space travel was, the embodiment of every discipline that we were studying.

1:15:52Current events, politics, physics, art, engineering, math. It was all wrapped up all into one. It was on TV regularly. I was just, I was the, of course, now you're going to think about this, but the idea of being alone in space in a space suit, it was kind of mirroring my life when I was like 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 years old. Wow. Yeah. I mean, it's, I don't know if you saw that movie, Fly Me to the Moon, recently. No, I did not. But it's, you know, it's streaming in the new movie economy, so I know it'll be there for 1 ,000 years. Yeah, I just watched it recently. It was fascinating. It's a little bit of the conspiracy theory really didn't happen yet.

1:16:32Normally I hate that kind of stuff, but it's good quality people. So I'll try to check it out. I'd love to get your thoughts on it when you see it. Yeah. And your other fascination is world wars. Well, this is another thing that goes back to the study of it. Let me put it to you this way. I was born in 1956. That's 11 years after the war is done. So essentially, everybody who is an adult in my life had memories of those years, whether they went to war or not. They had memories of the, what I like to call the emotional stasis of the early 1940s, in which, go back again, they did not know the war was going to end.

1:17:20in 1943, they had no idea how long the war was, who was going to live, who was going to die, who was going to win, who was going to not, who was not, who was going to come back. 1943, if you're alive, they're not saying, hey, don't worry about it. The war is going to be over in just another 18 months. They don't know that. And that was a palpable thing that was passed on to me because when it came around time to get to know the life stories of a teacher, a friend of my dad's, you know, parents of my pals. They would talk about those years, their youth in three distinctive parts, three acts of their lives, you know, which might have been picking up on because, you know, some sort of story sense.

1:18:07When they were kids, it was before the war. When my dad was in high school, it was before the war. When he was working on a farm, listening to the radio and worried about, you know, not being able to afford the dentist. It was before the war. Then there was, well, that was during the war. It's a whole different storytelling process. The whole different guidelines of the narrative. Well, you have to understand that was during the war. That was 42, was during the war. And their daily life was completely different than what it had been. There was less of things. There was this fear of this unseen enemy possible attack.

1:18:46There were blackouts. They couldn't get cling peaches. They didn't have birthday cakes as much. It was during the war. And also say, well, where were you? Oh, well, that was during the war. Well, where were you? Well, I was in a battalion. My dad was in the South Pacific. He was a machinist. And he would never have been in the South Pacific as a machinist or not for the war. Then the rest of their lives, when we show up, you know, when this next generation shows up, when their kids show up. All this stuff happened. And again, the narrative has completely changed. We have to understand that was after the war.

1:19:22So on one hand, there was something to celebrate. But on the other hand, there was, guess what? Life became one damn thing after another in a different way than it had been before the war. And, you know, the people that you, the people who did it well, you know, the storytellers, the teachers, or even the friends of my dads when we're sitting around and everybody's relaxed on a Thursday night and they're drinking beers, you know, and they're talking about when they're getting to know each other. The stories from any one of those acts I thought were fascinating, were ponderable, because as a seven-year-old, I'm hearing my dad and my mom and other people talk about when they were seven years old.

1:20:11With the magnifying glass and the division of, well, that was before the war. We did not know what was coming down the pipe. Then everything else that goes along with it. I still can't quite get past the fact that in 1964, the Beatles are on the Ed Sullivan show. And my dad is of the generation of just 20 years prior. The war was not yet over. And they had no idea when they were ever going to come home. And now these four kids are up on there saying, yeah, yeah, yeah. And playing guitars and stuff like that. And everybody's making a big deal about it. Part of it is never saw this coming, never would have, never.

1:20:53And in a lot of ways, now us younger generation did not have the same attention span for what they had been through. I mean, until the, you know, you can talk about Elvis Presley all you want. Rightly so. He was a massive generational force, changed the world a lot of ways. But still, vis-a-vis, a World War II generation. The Beatles come along in 1964, and it's almost as though the last vestige of that generation carries import, you know, has weight that we can pay attention to. even though I've never stopped studying of it because at the end of the day, it's just great storytelling. You want to talk about great protagonists, antagonists.

1:21:37You want to talk about the irony. You want to talk about the schizophrenia of what can happen in good and bad. World War II is about as good as you're going to get. And also here's this other thing that's ridiculously satisfying about it. It ended. There was a time when it was all done. And wars now go on for generations, and they go on for decades. And there are no moments when, you know, the swords are pounded into plowshares. Not that that happened in, you know, 100 % in 1945. Yeah. It seems as though, like, not that it's any comparison with the events that took place, but our language of this generation has become pre-pandemic, during the pandemic.

1:22:28About that, yeah. Yeah, you could probably look at it. There was a moment, certainly the AIDS crisis came along and the pandemic of AIDS. That certainly altered all of society in the same way. You could talk to an awful lot of guys who will say, well, you know what I'm saying, that was before AIDS. You know, that means it. And, yeah, you would say the same thing about certainly the COVID pandemic. We went through something that, I mean, look, I got grandkids who are now talking about their lives. Well, that was during COVID. And so they didn't go to school and they didn't see their friends. They were trying to do things online.

1:23:03It was really different. And now COVID has let go. And guess what? Now they're just getting on with the rest of the tasks of growing up with their life. So they too, you know, it might be a little young to remember, you know, before COVID, but they do. So yeah. So what's going to be next, do you think? What's going to be that next three-act structure to our collective history? Well, as you keep saying, more will be revealed as well. Yes, this too shall pass and more shall be revealed. And we will never all know of everything that we need to know. Yeah. You've been seen as the, or even in a poll, voted the most trusted man in America.

1:23:42There's an anomaly in the vote-taking process there. After all the times I've lied to everybody, oh, no, this is a great movie. By all means, come see this movie. That was a lie sometimes. How do you deal with that kind of a thing? Oh, you know, I don't know. There's a, okay, you know, I get it. That's good. I guess that comes around to perhaps the thing that I was talking about countenance-wise, you know. If you were going to take somebody who is an artist and say, who is the scariest person alive, you know, you'll come off with, you know, I don't know. Parking shouldn't slow you down. ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut.

1:24:28Book ahead, save up to 50 % and skip the hassle of circling the block. Park smarter, park faster. ParkWiz. Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park. I just think the process and the journey is so delicious. That's where all the good stuff is. You just can't live and die by the end result. It's scary putting yourself out there, especially when it's something you really care about and something that you hope is your passion in life and you want people to like it. Let's get delicious and put ourselves out there. I'm Simone Boyce, host of The Bright Side, and those were my recent guests, comedian Phoebe Robinson and writer Erin Foster.

1:25:03On this show, I'm talking to the brightest minds in entertainment, health, wellness, and pop culture. And every week, we're going places in our communities, our careers, and ourselves. It's not about being perfect. It's about going on a journey and discovering the bright side of becoming. Few people know that better than soccer legend Ashlyn Harris. It's the journey. It's the people. It's the failures. It's the heartache. It's the little moments. These are our moments to laugh, learn, and exhale. So join me every Monday, and let's find the Bright Side together. Listen to the Bright Side on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

1:25:43I'm Jonathan Goldstein, and on the new season of Heavyweight, I help a centenarian mend a broken heart. How can a 101-year-old woman fall in love again? And I help a man atone for an armed robbery he committed at 14 years old. And so I pointed the gun at him and said, this isn't a joke. And he got down, and I remember feeling kind of a surge of like, okay, this is power. Plus, my old friend Gregor and his brother tried to solve my problems. through hypnotism. We could give you a whole brand new thing where you're like super charming all the time. Being more able to look people in the eye. Not always hide behind a microphone.

1:26:27Listen to Heavyweight on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

1:26:38You know, Vincent Price, you know, whatever. I'm an artist, I'm a storyteller, And I think I'll take that as a testament to, I guess, the veracity that I brought to my craft, my choice. I'd like to think that, you know, go all in on a story and say, hey, sit down. You might be interested in hearing this. Is that you're – it's an onyx exchange between myself and the audience. And if it's an onyx exchange, then you could come to trust them. You know, that's not a bad thing. that's not a bad thing. Absolutely. And it's, it's quite magical, actually. I mean, trust in that way. Of course, you know, Hollywood success, you've spoken about it so many times, which is why we haven't dived into it.

1:27:24And then, you know, a happy, healthy marriage. And how did you know Rita was the one? Like that's, you know, how did you know? Divine providence? You know, maybe it's kind of like the same thing that happened when I was in school, uh, and in high school. And I said, this can be school. Um, there was a thing with, uh, with, uh, with reader where I just thought, wait, it could be like this. It could be like, just sit around. That's it. It could be like a carefree union. I didn't know that. How about that? I had, honestly, I had not truly experienced that somehow. And when it's there, you just kind And I go, oh, you know, I'd like to say, and then, you know, and then we met.

1:28:15And I said, and, you know, and that was that. Okay, yeah, that's pretty much it. Then you get on with it. And, you know, years later, no small amount of me saying things like, oh, let me get this straight. You know, there's a lot of plenty of plenty of examples of that going on, you know, with so much so that, oh, here goes dad. Oh, here goes dad with a let me get this straight. Why would it work for me argument? I pull it out. I pull it out all the time. And, you know, we do. She does too. And that's the exchange. Yes. And it remains glorious. And you can't create it anywhere else. Can't fake that.

1:28:56Yeah. There's that beautiful acceptance speech that you have in 2020 when you talk about how a man is blessed with this beautiful family. Oh, yeah, yeah. when you were in tears and that, you know, you can't, number one, I am a sap. Number two, you don't expect, you think you're going to be able to get up and, you know, get away with it. So I'm going to get it. There'll be some straight shooting. I'll see some great stuff. But then I just, you look down and, you know, there's my wife and there's, you know, there's, you know, a combination of all my kids, sometimes four or five, you know, they're all just there.

1:29:29And what do you see? I see little babies, you know. And I, you know, I see this woman that is put up with so much stuff. And you just, you know, life flashes before your eyes a little bit. And there's that moment of surrealism where it's like, can somebody explain to me how this happened? I'm not quite sure. And here does the same thing, the movie. Here, H-E-R-E. Yeah. There's a sense of watching your life flash back. What I really loved, okay, I guess we have to be careful about spoiler alerts. I know, I'm trying. I'm trying, I'm trying. We don't want to go there. But I think that it ends up examining this truth that sometimes life passes in the wink of an eye, and it's like, wow, are we here already?

1:30:24But there's other times in that same wake of an eye, you comprehend it all. And I think that's what the movie works towards, if I can be so bold. And in many ways, that was the theme that we were all working towards. And even in the perfectness of just the word. It happened here. This is where that happened. Have you ever been in like a really super historic place? Yes, a few times, yeah. Where something went down. Now, maybe it's something from thousands of years ago, or maybe it's something that you witnessed on TV yourself. You go to like Washington, D.C. and stood on the, you know, look, I made a movie in front of the Lincoln Memorial.

1:31:12I couldn't believe that was happening. And then years later, I'm going back. And there is a plaque at the top of the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, which is where Martin Luther King stood. And I have since gone back and read about that extraordinary day that did not happen by accident. In fact, it was originally going to be a protest. It was going to be a sit-in. And the powers that be all got together and said, rather than make it a protest of a sit-in, make it a march. and suddenly also things happened like there were plenty of bathrooms lined up. There were sandwiches that was made for people.

1:31:48There were social services. There were cops. There were army men standing by ready in case it was going to be a riot. And in 1964, 63, a riot was definitely a possibility. It would have been a massive amount of civil unrest. And instead, it was all of these speakers. Marlon Brando was there. Charlton Heston was there along with everybody. And Martin Luther King was, everybody could only speak for seven minutes because they did not want it to run over and become unruly. So everybody who spoke spoke for seven minutes, and that includes the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King. And there's a reason that plaque is there in order to place it.

1:32:32And to be there and see it and then just envision everything. It's a powerful place. powerful, powerful, spiritual. Yeah. Are there other places you've been to like that or revisited multiple times to decode and discover? Oh, yeah. I'll tell you one. Who cares what I said on other podcasts? When we were doing, believe it or not, when we were in Philadelphia, because I was making Philadelphia, kids were, you know, I only had three kids there and some of them were with us It was a freezing cold day. We had a day off. So we went and saw the sites, including Independence Hall, Liberty Bell, you know, a whole bit.

1:33:13What are you going to do in Philadelphia? You're going to go do that. You're going to see the Liberty Bell. You're going to go like that. And Independence Hall being a famous place, and it's still in the same joint, and it still holds the same, you know, dimensional structure to it, you know. Maybe a lot of everything that might have been, you know, recreated, but nonetheless, there it is. and we were up in the senate building and um the senate room you know because it had congress the supreme court and the senate right there and uh we were there and the the the it's a national park and the ranger said uh if you look at all of this stuff is reproductions except that chair you know which is the original chair it's a wow look the same it looked like a chair to me so said that chair that's an original chair and looked exactly like the same is that all this other stuff has been recreated to the best of its authenticity.

1:34:01And there's a riser there. And he said, that spot in front of that dais, John Adams was sworn in as the second president of the United States, taking the place of George Washington, was the first time in recorded history when the rule of a sovereign nation was passed to another without bloodshed and him not being a relation. I said something like that. And the head, I said, we are in holy ground. Nobody died. The king is dead, long live the king. No one was murdered, butchered. The hordes didn't come in and take away. No one was passing it on to his son in order to go on. There was no relation between John Adams and George Washington.

1:34:51The only thing that happened was this modicum of a thing they called democracy, which wasn't really democracy. I mean, women couldn't vote. If you were a slave, you were only three-fifths of a human being. The only people that actually voted were a bunch of white men, property owners, who originally didn't want to pay their taxes to the crown. But look what happened there. I mean, I've been to plenty of cool joints, but this idea, not unlike the place where Martin Luther King stood. The idea that was communicated right there was tantamount to being in, you know, some version of the holies of holies, you know, a precious shrine, a place of great faith and hope.

1:35:33I mean, speaking to that impact, you received honorary Greek citizenship. Oh, yeah. I got a passport. For your amazing work there. Well, yeah. Yeah. Look, we just love Greece. And, you know, it is the home country to my wife's family. And, well, you can do it. This is something that we do in Greece. You know, you go off to some other island, you're swimming somewhere, you're on a boat. And you can kind of like pivot. And all you see is land, sea, and sky. There's no sign of humanity. and you go like this is exactly what it's looked like for 110 ,000 years you know this is exactly what this island was here in this exact same fort and by the way there's a port right there which was you know of places of antiquity or that but to be able to look at something that is on scarred exactly as it was it's like looking at primordial force like going back in time and you see this aspect of the sky and the wind and the aridness of it but the power of you know a ship in order to get there.

1:36:48I've done that, you know, any number of places, you know, great historical places like that. And it ends up, it makes you feel really, really teeny tiny sometimes. It's like, who are we? But, you know, specks in the course of all of this is like standing under, you know, a big massive sky and finally seeing on a really super dark night, the, you know, our galaxy or the, you know, the Milky Way, our solar system. And it's like, wow, I haven't been out of town for a while. I forgot how big that sky is and that that's a part of this. It's important to go through that. So important. So important. Have you ever seen a solar eclipse?

1:37:27I'm sure I've kind of, but not, yeah. Not the last one, but the one prior to it, we made sure that we were in the path of totality and we saw it. And oh my God. God, I cannot talk, no special effect in any movie has ever had the same impact or effect on anybody who takes a look at what that is. You feel as though you are witnessing the clockworks of God, and they can predict it, they know what it's going to be, and every step of it is you cannot fathom what you are seeing. and it made me feel on one hand, it made us all feel on one hand really super tiny, but at the other hand, magnificent because we're a race that knew when it was coming and could predict it, could make sure we're there watching.

1:38:20It was really marvelous. Where was that? When you read it, there was like these paths, you know, you can look at it on a map, but we just made sure that we were up in the panhandle of Idaho in order to take a look at it. People were just parking their cars willy-nilly everywhere in order to be, They were driving from, you know, hundreds of miles on either side of it in order to get to this very specific path of totality. And it is, man, it is a totally immersive experience. Don't miss it if you can. Okay, next one. Tom, it has been such a joy spending time with you today. I feel so grateful to have been able to hear stories, be taken on adventures, and learn life's lessons through your insights.

1:39:00My boy, it's just been a delightful conversation. I've learned, I've loved hearing about your history, you know, how you got there. Very kind. For the oldest boy of a, what is it, a fractured marriage between Indian mom and dad, I think you've done well in your pursuit. Thank you. I'm very grateful. We end every On Purpose episode with a final five. These have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum. One word to one sentence maximum. which I will probably break the rules, so don't worry if you do. Okay. But Tom Hanks, these are your final five. The first question is, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?

1:39:41Throw deep, baby. And why? If you're going to do it, do it. If you have the chance, do it. Don't pause. Instinct, man. If you've got an instinct, go at it. Throw deep. I love that. Second question, what is the worst life advice you ever heard or received?

1:40:07Do Fantasy Island. I didn't take it, but there was no reason to do Fantasy Island. That's great. Question number three, how would you define your current purpose? To be present. Wherever one is, whoever is one around, be present. Be right there. Show up, be present. Why? Because that will teach you then, I think, how the difference between telling the truth to the best of your understanding and being all right with what happens next. If you can't do that, life is going to be a wasted opportunity, if that makes sense. Question number four. Are you making these up as you go along? No, no, no, no.

1:41:01These are all, no, no, no. All right, okay. Every single question I've asked you today. What's something you believe you're learning and evolving into right now or something that you're tinkering with right now personally? There is an addictive quality to examining the past that can be counterproductive if you're only doing it in order to wallow in a nostalgia of how easy things were back then. I fancy myself a lay historian. Vanity of vanity, all is vanity. There's nothing new under the sun. Okay, so this stuff has been going on forever. If you are not looking, if I am not looking for examples of the frailties of the human condition, if I'm only looking at the past in a version of There was an antagonist and there was a protagonist and the protagonist one.

1:41:55Missing the point of how miraculous the human condition is. If you're going to, I went to Egypt and I saw all the stuff that tourists see when they see Egypt, right? And if you're going to Egypt in order to come up with some, oh, this is the home of great spirituality is there was a cosmic power here and this is where, okay, fine, go ahead. I'm not going to tell you that's not what's going on. But if you're not also seeing this ongoing frigging mystery of what humankind has figured out on its own, you're missing out. Yes, they call them the great pyramids. They weren't necessarily built for great reasons.

1:42:44Sometimes they were just built in order to maintain the status quo of the haves and the have-nots. When I heard a guy say, the Sphinx, you know, the great Sphinx, you could have been alive 2 ,000 years after the great Sphinx was built, and you're still in pharaohic Egypt. It's still before the common era began. And guess what? But you and nobody else has any idea who built the Sphinx. That's how old it is and that it's bailed as well as it. And if you don't take that and understand like, man, there's mystery there. Who did it? How they did it? That stuff's always interesting. The why they did it, that's interesting too.

1:43:32But also that incredible impact of that, the Sphinx will never be explained. if you're just there for the nostalgia you don't want to ride the camel get your picture you can do all that stuff and that's a blast but there's something to the past that if you allow yourself just to be soothed by it you're missing out on a great life lesson something that is important as physics or poetry so powerful why do you think we do that I think because we're looking for a we want to feel good about going to sleep at night, you know? We want to feel as though that there is this purpose that outside, I think, outside the cosmic understanding that, hey, you know what?

1:44:24You know, the universe is indifferent, but the human condition is not. That's what separates us from, you know, the chaos theory. We don't have to live in chaos if we choose not to. And if we're only looking at the past in order for some degree of, oh, it was so much easier back then. No, it's never been easier. As I said before, you know, no one knows that they're living in the 1400s. They were just alive back then. And it might be highfalutin, but what it says is, oh, I'll tell you this, what it says is, our best days are yet to come. We are going to progress from here. And if you're just looking at the past and saying, man, that was when it was great.

1:45:08I wish we could go back. No, you never want to go back. You always have to understand that our best days are still ahead of us. Otherwise, what's that say of us if we don't move forward? It says we gave up or got lazy or ended up putting too much power in maintaining a status quo that ends up being a division between the haves and the have-nots. Absolutely. Well said. Fifth and final question. We ask this to every guest who's ever been on the show. If you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be? Man, you spring this on me? Really? I'm looking at a wall of shame of people, your Polaroids of people that have been, they all came up with something for that?

1:45:55They did. one law that everybody had to follow, a law, meaning you could be punished if you don't obey this law? Sure. Well, it can't be like a philosophical thing like be kind, you know. Being kind is in the eye of both the kinder and the kindee. I would pass a law that says no one is allowed to infringe or prom the right in regards to what somebody else reads. That is, no matter how disagreement, whatever that disagreement is, to be free is to think. and the most physical manifestation of thought is in the choosing of what you read. So I would say that no one is allowed to infringe upon the right to determine, figure out what the legal, no one is allowed to infringe upon the right of an individual to read what they choose to read.

1:47:14That would be the law. Now, take a look at all the societies. You know, I'm fascinated by communism, man, because those guys were idiots. You know, they truly were. And the idea that in East Berlin, you cannot read To Kill a Mockingbird or Dr. Zhivago, for crying out loud. The idea that you can maintain order in society by preventing somebody from reading what they want to read. This is madness. This is tyrancy in its boat. This is Draconian, what's the word I'm looking at? That's despotism at its absolute height that you can do that. And I think on the opposite of that, absolute freedom to read what you want to read and along with that, create what you want to create as well.

1:48:06That should be the default position of the human condition. And is it amazing that it's not? So that would be the law I would pass. Powerful, unique, and completely original answers are worth waiting for. Well, as an author, you know, as a guy who writes, I'll bow to that. Tom, thank you so much. Oh, this was magnificent. Thank you so much. Oh, it was great. Such a pleasure. And I can't wait for everyone to go and watch here on November 1st. All right. Yeah, we'll pay that. Oh, yes. Go ahead. Now, by the way, you can only see it in a theater. Yes. Okay, here's the thing. This is why Crackstaff is so petrified.

1:48:42There is no streaming deal for this movie. Yeah. You know, you're not going to be able to, you know, log on, enter your passcode, you know, share it with your friends. The only way you're going to, you're going to have to drive to a place and buy a ticket at a certain time and sit in a room with a bunch of strangers. I love it. And watch this movie. It's almost unheard of. And of course, everybody is petrified that that's going to be the requirements of seeing a movie. But that's the way it's going to be. I love it. Theaters are still one of my favorite experiences. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's the, you know, not to continue along with that, but there's this thing that we talk about all the time right now.

1:49:16And I actually believe that podcasts can be an example of it. It is the experiential economy, meaning that it is one thing. Look, everything is a one-on-one. You listen to a record, you see a band. But the experience of being with others as opposed to being in your house or being on your headphones or being like that, being with others has a value to it. that in some cases is worth money. Okay, that's commerce. But on other cases is to be sought after. My wife and I went to see a play in New York. It was a revival of Into the Woods. And it was more or less right after the pandemic. Theaters were back opening again.

1:50:00People were essentially living their lives again. Everybody had gotten enough vaccines and what have you. and COVID wasn't killing as many people as it had. And so we went to the theater because we knew some people in it and it was, this thing happened. You know, it's a theater, a mumble, everybody, blah, blah, blah, blah, sold out, big hit and mumble, mumble, mumble. And when the house lights went to half for the first act, there was a standing ovation. people stood up before a word before a note had been sung nothing had happened on the what was happening was the show is about to start and it was a standing ovation and i i literally said that's that's the experience people are reacting to the experience of being with strangers or a handful of friends with strangers in a room and nothing what is going to happen in this room will never be repeated.

1:51:01The only people that will participate in this is the folks that are here right now. And movies oftentimes can have that same experience because I can remember going to see 2001 or Jaws or Close Encounters or Aliens or Full Metal Jacket. I can remember the specifics of all those things. And it's the same experiential experience. And maybe it's part of the economy or maybe it's just part of the great human purchase that we all want to participate in. For sure. Thank you, Tom. Thank you. Thank you. Such a pleasure. I really enjoyed it. If you love this episode, you'll love my interview with Will Smith on owning your truth and unlocking the power of manifestation.

1:51:43Anybody who hasn't spoken to their parents or their brother, call them right now. Don't think you're going to have a chance to call them tomorrow or next week. That opportunity with my father changed every relationship in my life. Parking shouldn't slow you down. ParkWiz gives every driver a shortcut. Book ahead, save up to 50 % and skip the hassle of circling the block. Park smarter, park faster. ParkWiz. Download the ParkWiz app today and save every time you park. Hey guys, it's AZ Fudd. You may know me as a gold medalist. You may know me as an NCAA national champion. You may even know me as a people's princess.

1:52:23Every week on my new podcast, Fud Around and Find Out, I'll be talking to some special guests about pop culture, basketball, and what it's like to be a professional athlete on and off the court. Listen to Fud Around and Find Out, a production of iHeart Women's Sports in partnership with Unanimous Media on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The risks they took would be unthinkable to any doctor today, but odds are someone you know is alive because of them. Welcome to the Wild West of American Medicine. I'm Chris Pine, and this is Cardiac Cowboys, a podcast that tells the gripping true story behind the birth of open-heart surgery and the maverick surgeons who made it happen.

1:53:07Listen to the Cardiac Cowboys podcast starting February 6th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeart Podcast.