S11 EP2: Mick Jagger's Birthday Party

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2:01Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Whittacombe. Welcome to Parenting Hill, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping or hopefully how they're not coping and we'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips advice and of course tales of parenting woe because let's be honest there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing hello you're listening to parents in hell with rory can you say rob Bob Beckett and can you say Josh Josh Beckett well done is that Bob Beckett do you know what's interesting about that she only needed to prompt the first name and he had the second one in his bag really so he knew already can I say Rob and he said Bob Beckett and can you say Josh and he said Josh Widdicum Widdicum it's a tough one though Widdicum how is Josh Widdicum oh who's that first let's get the full details How is Josh Whittacombe?

3:12That's what I say in the mirror every morning. How is and who is Josh Whittacombe? Welcome to the podcast. Welcome, where I chat to guests about the things that make them, break them, and create them. Welcome to the show. It's called Behind the Curtain with Bob Beckett. Can you hear that plane going over? No. And every Instagram clip will start with you crying, and then it'll cut back to that intro. basically what we'll do is we'll get you to come to a studio in central London you'll have to make your own way there your own way back we won't pay you we won't pay you any money we'll force you to cry and visit trauma then we'll plaster that everywhere with some sort of mad thumbnail algorithm we'll pay people to promote that into other people's to Instagram feeds that don't even want it so the comments will be negative because it'll be enforced down the throats of people that don't like you um and then um what we'll do is we'll earn quite a lot of money from that and not pay you thank you very much here's a word for our sponsor how is and who is josh riddick how is and who is josh riddick well i tell you how is and who is emily and rory this is our adorable 22 month old who has been listening to your podcast since he was born whenever he hears both your voices he says your name we've been listening to the podcast as a family that's mental i just think that's mental what listening to this with kids well they're too young they're they're young enough that it doesn't matter but there's going to come a point when you have to draw the line well do you reckon that'll come what think will they pick up from it let me tell you this for free do you know what my son yeah i i i hate um i you know we're not a podcast of funny things our kids said Rob but no well my son did fall out of bed the other day yeah he fell out of bed twice in a week and the second time he fell out of bed I just heard a thud and then he went not again

5:17maybe we should be a podcaster what funny things that was great that was good stuff it was so tight wasn't it you set something up that's applicable to the podcast theme there was a punchline at the end we all laughed we moved we're not talking about traffic lights aren't working exactly this is what this is where the bloody money is mate come on Stephen Bartlett wouldn't be talking about traffic lights he'd have your kid on crying exactly what do you think made you fall out of bed um we've been listening to the podcast as a family before he was born and both my mum and brother as well as my partner drew and all love it thank you for keeping us both sane both pre and after covid not pre let's be very clear about that during during yeah not pre-covid early pre-covid pre-covid yeah um i've had two incidents regarding the podcast i just got gobble gobbled by a paramedic on the way back from the shop wow what out the window no i was walking past a a group of paramedics outside a coffee shop right and uh i'd cut through the middle of them because they were in the pavement and uh one of them just said gobble gobble as i went past gobble gobble yeah that's nice you've got been gobble gobbled by a paramedic having coffee also i had a dream about this podcast last night rob which is rare i dreamt that i'd already got up and done it and then just gone back to bed i wouldn't say that's a dream that what you've set me up for there is like you had a wonderful dream about how much you love this but what you've done there is you've just thought i haven't got time for this today do you know what in the dream i was thinking am i phoning this in because i've literally got up i don't know what i've said i've gone back to bed you sure it was a dream and not just the last episode that's the worry that's the worry in your head you've already done this pod did you do the anecdote about the your son falling out of bed because that was quite good no i didn't actually no no i didn't what did you say in the episode i just didn't in my in the dream episode i didn't remember anything i'd said and i was kind of thinking to myself that's not good enough you've you've not put any effort you've had an anxiety induced to-do list dream yeah oh we've been to-do listing all over the fucking shop today so you had a busy morning did you say before we start recording uh well yeah so my mother-in-law's had an operation on her back oh okay yeah so she's uh she's here uh rose is working my mother-in-law's sister whatever that would be is here as well to kind of help look after her while i do side piece yeah so while i do this podcast shout out to jiggy so your mother-in-law's sister has come around to be like look after your mother-in-law while you do the podcast well she was there last she got her from hospital last night because we were coming back from cornwall right and brought her back to here yeah to your house in london yeah right she stayed the night she stayed the night and she's nursing her sister she's nursing her sister and then uh God, it's shit getting old, isn't it?

8:10It's rubbish. Don't do it. Isn't it? Like, the thought of me having to drive my brother back from the hospital because he's got a back, I pray. Oh, fuck. You know, I don't need this. Yeah. And then... Is that too harsh? No, it's fine. Because I think getting old is shit. I think everyone who's old says it's fucking shit. That was my gran when I was growing up would just say, don't get old, darling. It's such a bore, she used to say. Such a bore. Such a bore. Yeah. Because it's just aches and it's pains and it's... Anyway, so... Well, I hope she feels better soon. She will. She's got a plastic brace around her.

8:51Like, but she's got to wear for three months. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah. But she's in good spirits. And she's actually pretty active, considering. Oh, that's good. I thought she would be kind of horizontal, but actually she's... She was up and about yesterday. Oh, that's good. Best wishes to your mother and mom. She's going to the coffee shop. Yeah, so that's going on. And then we've got the kids. And then we've got back from hospital. So they're off school tomorrow. Yeah, it's summer holidays. And they're not in any summer camps. My daughter's going to Art Bash next week. Art Bash? Wow. Art Bash.

9:25My kids have been in one this week, but then they're off next. They're doing one art class, actually. But it's balancing it, the old summer camps, because you want to see them as well. So they're off at the moment. You do want them to have a summer, don't you? You don't want them to be like those American kids that go to summer camp. And then it's just like, but my son, obviously nursery is still going. Oh, that goes through summer. Yeah. So you should do it off today? Well, no, because it's quite difficult to take him in when she's off. Do you know what I mean? Oh, yeah. Why does she get to snow?

9:57Yeah. So you're just like, fuck it. I'm doing this at 9am. So who's looking after the kids now? My mother-in-law's sister. Gosh, she's taking a hit, isn't she? Well, yeah. Until 11. Yeah, she is. We're just sitting staring at the TV. But my sons did have a week of nursery. Yeah. Which we've had to cancel because he's having his tonsils out. Oh, no. And you basically have to put them in quarantine for 10 days after they've had their tonsils out. So has he had tonsillitis a certain amount of times then? No, he's got sleep apnea. Oh, gosh. so when he sleeps it sounds like he's suffocating throughout the night oh my god yeah so he's got his tonsils out he does i hope he's not a listener because he doesn't know it yet

10:51he's been that if he's a listener he's been hammered so far this episode yeah um oh bless him oh that's horrible how you feel that's horrible yeah you've got a stressful little summer here ain't you josh yeah fucking hell i'm removing the house do you know what though just It's making me feel better about my summer. Yeah. I went to the driving range yesterday. The reason we're not talking about moving house, we can just say this. I went to the driving range and the gym yesterday. Oh, fucking hell. I could have all seen. I can't tell you how far I am off having the chance to do exercise. The kids are in summer camp, and I woke up, and I went, Lou, what are you doing today?

11:21She was like, nothing. I went, me too. I went, fuck it. I'm not going to the bloody gym. I went to the driving range, went to the gym, then did a food shop, then went to the chiropractor and got my beard trimmed. Fucking hell. Do you know what's happened this morning? What? I've got gobble-gobbled. I've had to go to the shop twice because we haven't gone in. That sounds like you started the day of a blowjob. Sorry. Woke up, gobble-gobbled. Rose went to work. Then I popped down the cafe. The cat's pissed in the hallway. Oh, how old's the cat, Josh? It's because she's been stressed because we were away.

11:54Yeah, and she's getting fed by neighbour. But she's old. And does she know she's moving? Is she a listener? She's not a listener. She doesn't know she's moving. um how old is she we got her when i went to australia so 2015 um 10 years old entering old for a can it yeah i think she's got a few more years i'm slightly worried about moving our vet because obviously we've got in a good groove with having her kidneys flushed

12:25and what how shit is getting old and we're not even properly old but a genuine concern of you is oh actually it's you know he knows how to flush her kidneys she knows he's gonna flush her kidneys we drop him off we pick him up flush the kidney it's fine so you need to find a new kidney flusher where you're moving to so we should say about moving because we didn't it's difficult to talk about the moving process yes legal stuff while it's happening like and you're going you don't want to be going fucking hell the surveys come back etc so we've we're recording it as we going then we're going to put out some specials yeah we've got a couple of secret um tapes of the what's going on with the move so we're not deep diving on the move in these episodes but when the move's sorted we'll release it or there's going to be some really bleak secret tapes of someone's house move falling through and you know what the listeners they want that they want sick sick people put it out i will put it out we'll put it out and you'll love it you'll gobble gobble that up and oh oh i can't wait to listen to that one his house move fell through you animals and you know what i'd be loving it too if i was yeah yeah too i reckon if we did an instagram vote 85 of you would say you want the house move to fall through

13:40and thank you and thank you our law listeners it's true though isn't it yeah and then there'll be a couple listening and you're probably listening now and you'll listen to the house smooth, full through, and you turn it off and say to each other, well, I think they rush that anyway. And they have their little opinions. Oh, yeah, what a mad thing to do anyway. Serves them right, actually. And I'd be doing it too. Yeah. Tomorrow morning is knocking. Stock your fridge now. How about a creamy mocha frappuccino drink? Or a sweet vanilla? Smooth caramel, maybe. Or a white chocolate mocha. Whichever you choose, delicious coffee awaits.

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14:50um how's your summer holiday been rob some holidays um it's been good actually we've um well i went to oasis i didn't even talk about going to oasis oh yeah talk to me i've got because i'm going oh my god that was another dream i had what that you went to oasis you've got to go you're not going i am going you are going when are you going gallagher died and i this is awful but in the dream i was like fucking hell if i had gone to one of the earlier tour dates but that was in the dream he's not dead though no gallagher is he not dead at the time of recording. He will be at some point. But he looks in fine, Fettle.

15:22I'm going on, well, I'm going in September to the Wembley in September. Nice. Tell me about it. That's amazing. Let's be clear. Yeah. I know, because I follow Lou on Instagram, that you didn't make swimming the next morning. I did not make swimming this morning. Last time you were promising you were going to make swimming with your kids. I didn't make swimming. I negotiated no swimming with the kids for a Pizza Express and a toy. Did you do the negotiation in the morning or when you got back at 1am? Do you know what the greatest power we have this summer holidays is? What? Lou won a raffle thing, which allowed her to buy a box of La Boo Boo's.

16:02What, La Boo Boo's? Lou Boo Boo's are these little furry teddies that everyone's going mad for. They're about 12 quid a box, and they're mystery boxes. Type in La Boo Boo Popmart. How you spend, oh yeah, right. And then basically what was happening was people queuing up to the shops to buy loads and sell them for 80 quid a pop. She won a raffle to buy them. Basically, you enter a raffle. If you win the raffle and you turn up on that day, you can buy a normal box and there's eight of them and at normal price. So they're about 10 or each. It comes about 80 quid. We bought one of them. We put them in a cupboard.

16:31And now, under strong Donald Trump-style tariff negotiating armies, look, if we don't go swimming, the boo-boo? Yeah, but you can't play them too often. We can't play them too often, but I needed to play them because I got basically. So talk to me about Oasis. How unbearable were you? Awful. Cried. I cried. Did you? During whatever. Cried during whatever. I basically wasn't going to try and get too drunk. Do you know why whatever's not on an album? I know it's a B-side. Yeah, do you want to? I know it was a single. Single. But it never made it onto an album. Do you want to know why? Why is that?

17:06This is boring trivia. Go on. It's not stopped you before. That's a shame. Sorry. Sorry, I'm going to apologise. It was such a nice time. You folded your arms. You've got in your own head again. Unfold your arms. Because the tune is taken from a different tune by, I can't remember, from a guy called Neil Innes in the 60s. So it's a reworking of a tune. And so they couldn't put it on an album. Because you'd have to pay him too much money. Pay him too much money. So it's a single only. It's a great song. I love it. I can't fucking wait. so basically we went and got really i met with our friends and i was like i'll drink in a day but not at the gig so i drank quite sensibly had a couple of beers had a big lunch what i'll do i'll start drinking and then that'll be the point at which i want to stop when i get to a racist having had five pints then i won't want to drink well what happened was and then i started drinking rose with loads of ice and sort of hydrating myself as i go yeah that's not a thing but yeah that is a thing that's something me and lou have been working on this summer lots of ice you're not even getting drunk you just get a little buzz okay yeah anyway so i did that it's quite good actually felt a bit tired and then richard ashcroft where were you having your rose and ice at oasis so the tickets were in we were in seated but like in the raw but i was sat where they give the fa cup out were you yeah so i paid for my tickets before you get in my head club wembly yeah and there was like a bar behind that area that's where i'm drinking and i paid for my tickets and i'll be honest they were punchy yeah they've got punchy um yeah so we were getting rosé with that and anyway the gig started richard ashcroft you've got to get in for richard ashcroft when he does i'm not going to be able to get into the richard ashcroft i told you why i can't get him for richard ashcroft my friends kept on bringing rosé but without without ice i was drinking loads of it got overexcited stood up and sang for the whole two hours the most amazing gig I've ever been to.

18:59Yeah. And then carried on drinking because I got invited to a party. Sorry, are you 18? You got invited to a party? Yeah. And I went to a nightclub. Someone had an empty. I went to a nightclub. You went to a nightclub? And I arrived there at midnight and left at 2am. What about your motorbike? I got the motorbike. Now, when it comes to Unrelatable, I think this, we might have to end the podcast here. Okay, you got the motorbike revving outside like a bad boyfriend. And the motorbike was amazing. I got the motorbike, zipped through London, and he dropped me off at the nightclub to my friend's birthday party.

19:36Who is your friend? Is your friend famous? When I say my friend, it's not my friend. I went to Mick Jagger's birthday party. What? No. That is mental. I know. What? How did this happen? So I got a text message off Jimmy Carr. What? You were at Oasis. I went, yeah. You went, do you want to go for a drink after? I was like, maybe. I've got to get back. You went, it's at Mick Jagger's birthday party. I went, yep, I'll see you there. That is mental. And I was not in a fit state to go to another party. So talk to me about who's there. So you get there. I arrive. What age is Mick Jagger? 82. And you can't say no to that party because there might not be many more.

20:20Of course. And I don't know if you'll be invited. And I don't think I was officially invited. I was Jimmy Carr's mate, basically. Did you speak to him? So I arrived in a pair of Adidas Ambers, Adidas socks, Stone Island shorts. Did you jettison your mates at this point? I ditched them. They're gone. Yeah. See you later. This is mental. You've changed. I have. Up yours. See you later. I'm getting on my motorbike. Good luck on the tube. Thank you. You do the same. See you next week. Anyway, I got there and then I got taken in by the security guard guys. and I got taken for it. It was a tiny little back room and Mick Jagger was there.

21:01Obviously, a lot of his ex-wives and children from his ex-wives. Get him on the bloody pod. He was Mariella Frost. Yep, Mariella Frost. She was someone Guinness, this sort of like fashion lady. Don't know. I don't know, but she looked like Lady Gaga. Yep. Sacha Baron Cohen. Fucking Nora. Ronnie Wood. and then a lot of family friends. It's nice that he's, because some people you think, oh, they probably aren't mates. It's nice that Ronnie Wood's going to his birthday. It actually felt like quite a fun, and I think his mate owns the club. Anyway, it was really nice. Everyone was really chatty and hospitable.

21:41The music was quite loud. So talk to me about the amount of people. Are we talking 12 people? Oh, 40 or 50. Right, right, right. In a little room. So you must have spoken to him. so I said hello to Mick Jagger I didn't properly chat to him because there was like another separate room that had him in it with like Sacha Baron Cohen and I was chatting to Ronnie Wood and Ronnie Wood's wife Sally who are lovely Sally Wood Sally Wood so I was chatting to them for most of the night oh wow and then Jimmy Carr obviously and then a couple of others and then I was like I'm too pissed to be here I was so pissed can I just ask Mick Jagger has a VIP area at his own birthday party yeah you've got to respect it and then the cake came out I'm stood there Josh I'm stood there I am absolutely I don't give a fuck about I'm relatable I've drunk I'd say at this point two espresso martinis and sorry has Mick Jagger gone to Oasis no idea I've had six pints of lager two espresso martinis and I'd say a bottle and a half a rose and just been to the best gig of my life and I'm stood wearing a Stone Island Anorak this is right with a vodka and soda after being on a motorbike chatting to ronnie wood and sally wood and jimmy car and i'm just talking absolute shite what did the motorbike wait no he dropped me off and then i then when i left i was like i'm going now and because all the security are used to looking after like yeah like the rolling literally the rolling stones yeah they're like okay he's leaving i got like frog marched out by four people that were like holding on to me They were just delighted.

23:19No, but... At last, he's fucking leaving. Maybe I got kicked out. I don't know. No, but they were, like, escorting me out. Because they're used to doing the Rolling Stones, they normally, like, put their arms behind their back and then, like, march them out, don't they? Yeah, and then they took me to the toilet, bog-wash me, and someone put my trousers down and slapped my bum. So just to confirm, Keith Richards didn't attend. I didn't see it. He might have been there earlier, but I got there late. Oh, right, yeah. But they're walking me out, like, they're extracting me, like I'm a Rolling Stone, and there's like 10 ,000 people trying to grab me.

23:48Poor Ronnie Wood. He's sober talking to you after you're that hammered. They said they wanted to come to a gig. I woke up in the morning and it said hello and it was a text message from Sally and Ronnie Wood. Amazing. Anyway, I'm getting marched out and they're like, come with me. And they're like, as if, but I don't need this level of security. No one even knows who I am really in this room. You're not married. Let me get to your car. Let me get to your car. And I was like, I haven't got a car. What? Because they're expecting like, I was like, I haven't got a car. I went, I'm getting a cab. and I went all right and I'm just on the street and then I got I got photograph coming out of it oh did you why I look absolutely wired yeah anyway and then I got on a taxi from Chelsea to my house and it cost it cost quite a lot of money Josh and I fell asleep but that is one of the great anecdotes and I had to get cash out but I was too pissed to put my pin number in it's bad you didn't take card well no where I live the signal's not good fucking hell mate what a different life you lead from like one minute to the next i fell asleep right and i'm like asleep in this and i fell asleep like i didn't fall asleep i basically passed out right of exhaustion and alcohol so i'm laying there in the back of the car and i'm getting bounced around and then he goes hello mate i'm at a cash point and we're like 10 minutes from my house and i wake up and yet have you ever like oh no you don't drink anymore i woke up and i was like i don't even know where my wallet is i don't know where my cards and i'm just stood in front of the cash machine like yeah i used to regularly end up get cancelling my pin because i couldn't remember it when you got drunk yeah just three years i very rarely have these nights out and it only got exacerbated because i got invited to that thing but you very rarely go to big jack's birthday party once a year once a year at most but yeah so that was it was one of the most mental nights of my life but that is fucking incredible oasis was i was on such a high then you still didn't go swimming didn't go swimming that was a tough morning so you prefer to hang out with celebs than your own children do you know what when my kids get to 18 and i explain what's going on they would they would say you were right yeah and i did explain to him on the podcast i said to him this is daddy's day i'm gonna do whatever the fuck i want today i'm gonna meet up it's my friend Mick's birthday.

25:58It's my good friend Mick's birthday. And I'm going to go to that birthday party, sing happy birthday to him, eat some of his cake and not have a full conversation with him, actually. What cake's he having? Because he's great. Lovely chocolate, lovely cake, lovely chocolate cake. Didn't put all the candles on, though. No, no, no. Wasn't 82? Fire lungs to blow those out. The amount of hairspray in that room. So how many of his exes were there? Was Jerry Hall there? I think so. I'm not sure because I was really drunk and I didn't really know anyone was, but I was just chatting to everyone. yeah yeah that was really chey i would say probably one of the most um dominant individuals at the party that one shouldn't be there or be talking to anyone in the state he was in i knew i was drunk because it was very hot in there and i wore anorak yeah the whole time i didn't even attempt to take it off did you talk to ronnie wood about oasis like or did you think that's a bit yeah i did i spoke to him a lot about he apparently you know it was quite interested in my upbringing because Mick Jagger and Ronnie Wood, obviously, are all very working class, boys done well kind of thing.

27:04So he was very interested about where I grew up and stuff. I think he was one of the... He said it's a dog's barking. Can you hear that? Yeah, that's all right. Well, no, it's not my call. Michael? I'm going to shut the door. I'm just going to shut the window. This is... Is that my dog? Can you give me two seconds? Yeah, of course. Right, I'll shut it. Oh, fucking hell, I nearly fell over. Hello? on the picture, your anorak that's not wet, is it? that's the design I just thought you'd it was probably the best one of the best nights I've ever had yeah, I bet it was, well I can't wait for Oasis now it's rock and roll's back, it's back it's the 90s again, it's crazy I'm very excited, go to Oasis before I know it I'll be at Ringo Starr's wedding anniversary laughter laughter laughter you know that I've got a bit of a I've told you that I've got a problem that I'm doubling it with a wedding.

27:58And where is the wedding? Battersea. Do they know you're doubling it? Yeah, because Oasis was in first. So what time is dinner? Are you there all day? And also, just to argue, just to argue, right? Go on. In my defence. Who's going, you and Rose, to Oasis? No, Rose is staying at the wedding. Who are you going to Oasis with? Three friends. And you're meeting them there? Yeah. Cool. Just to argue. I got offered to buy a ticket for Oasis the week before my tour went on sale so I was doing a tour show on that date that then got moved before it sold any tickets, before it went on sale because I wouldn't have moved it if it was on sale because it would fuck people over so had I not got the Oasis ticket I wouldn't be able to go to the wedding at all right so they're already getting Joshua and Cumbone this time No, what I'm actually saying is Oasis has made me able to go to the wedding.

28:57I can't then throw it back in the Gallagher's face. No, of course not. You've got respect to the initial booking. Exactly. So what times you're there, what times does the wedding start? I don't know. You've got to get there for the last Richard Ashcroft song. Well, I like cast, but I don't think that's feasible. No, cast were good. Richard Ashcroft was good. But the last, when he does Bittersweet Symphony. Yeah. that is a moment tell you who's making a bit of money off that who wrote the strings for that your mate Mick the Jackman yeah the Rolling Stones made a loan of money out of Bittersweet Symphony it's a bit like that whatever thing and you know what I ate the cake of that profit you ate the cake of that profit you enjoyed the song and then ate the cake of the profit full circle the only way to complete that circle was for me to have a shit at that nightclub leave my mark Tomorrow morning is knocking.

29:54Stock your fridge now. How about a creamy mocha frappuccino drink? Or a sweet vanilla? Smooth caramel, maybe. Or a white chocolate mocha. Whichever you choose, delicious coffee awaits. Find Starbucks frappuccino drinks wherever you buy your groceries. Want smoother, brighter skin without adding another complicated step to your routine? Try Daily Microfoliant from Dermalogica. This exfoliating powder activates with water to gently polish away dull, flaky skin, leaving it feeling smoother and looking brighter. It's gentle enough to use every day, so keeping your skin looking healthy and fresh is easy.

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30:39Right, I've got other stuff to talk about, more relatable. Yeah. Paul McCartney's babysitting for you. Little blackbird. Singing to the kids. So on to Lisbon with Lou. You are. By the way, Lisbon's outrageous. Lisbon's so good. Have you been to Lisbon? No, we were going to go. And then it was our last, it was right at the end of Rose being pregnant the first time. It was like the last, we cancelled it. And we've never been back. Right. And once our kids turn 18, you'll be there. We'll be there. So you had some time away from your kids. Time away from the kids. And I actually missed them a little bit though.

31:19Cause I've been, Lou loved it obviously. Cause she's been with them nonstop. Cliff Richard did a good job, didn't he? Like looking after them. We're all going on. But I had a bit of an incident on the way back from the airport. Do you want to hear what happened? What? Well, the flight got delayed, right? BA again. Yeah. My good old friend's BA. flight got delayed to two hours because of that radar not working it's quite scary that when you were in an airport they go the radar's not working yeah yeah anyway it was for everyone fair enough but you know nothing they could do anyway landed two hours late then was at the airport and then we waited for an hour for our bag didn't turn up yeah then we went to try and find the bag and then we basically lou went to um a lady at the reception said oh um our bag can you scan this and let us know where our baggage went oh well i've just scanned it yeah and she's scanned it she said she scanned it it's just arrived two minutes ago at carousel 11 okay um and then we went over to carousel 11 which wasn't moving and it's just loads of abandoned bags so like a big pile of every lost bag at he froze the saddest carousel in heath so it's basically all the lost bags so we spend about 20 minutes going for every bag to find our bag can't find the bag right then i spend 15 minutes doing it lou's still waiting at the original carousel so anyway now this is like three hours after we landed and then we go back and i and lou says to the lady can you scan this for me she went i've already scanned it there's no point and it was like okay well you scanned it before they've heard what you're saying about the bi and said it was there but it's not there do you mind she went no there's no point scanning it so refused to scan it so then i took the card and said to someone else excuse me can you scan this for me please so i can see where my bag is and the lady went yeah and she was lovely that lady she was like yeah okay she scanned it and She went, nothing's come up yet.

33:02It's not arrived at Heathrow. Nothing's been scanned in. So basically what that means is you need to put in the form. And I've done it before. My bag's been lost before by BA. It's not my first rodeo. So you basically go to an iPad, put your details in, and when it arrives, they send it to your house. So today's Friday. We came home Wednesday night. Apparently the bag's arriving in an hour. So it's been missing two days. anyway so i say so sorry it's not been scanned in at all and i was like your colleague just said it had been scanned in and it had arrived two minutes ago at carousel 11 so what did she why is she why is she lying to us oh and i and then i was like because if you just said it weren't here i don't mind bags get lost i get it that's and you've had a terrible day just tell me that we wouldn't have spent 45 minutes looking for a bag that wasn't there yeah and anyway and then the lady come over and she was so she was so aggy and she was like uh sorry what i was like so you you lied to my wife about where the bag was it was never there and we've just wasted 45 but she went don't call me a liar i'm not a liar why are you getting aggressive and i was like no i weren't getting aggressive i've seen you get aggressive and that annoyed me a little bit because like if you accuse someone of being aggressive it's very difficult to backtrack from that and i was like i'm not being aggressive and then it looked and it basically i hadn't even moved and she was shouting at me going i've been here for nine hours it's made it's been crazy and I was like I've been here for two hours I'm not even getting paid that didn't help and then she started going you'll be really aggressive and then she went don't call me I went well I'm not okay maybe I'll change the word I was misled but one of you's lying because one of you said it's been scanned in there so whether you're mistaken or not and she just got really angry and started shouting at me your bag's turning up with a shit in it in an hour yeah the bag's going to turn up with human shit in it in an hour so we'll see what's going on but then I tried to I tried to message BA right and they were like because I put a thing up they blocked you no but they basically I put a thing up going been shouted out lost my bag with BA and because I've got I've got a photo of a baby seat that's disgusting from when I flew before so I always have this running joke where when BA mess me about I go they'll make me release the photo have I ever sent you the photo uh yeah you have you yeah it's disgusting anyway so I just I was only joking around anyway and they went hi Rob sorry to about your luggage and they really to be fair everyone on the app the app's been really nice and on the plane it's just this one woman that's obviously having a bad day but she shouldn't be shouting at me for losing the bag anyway um she basically like I sent her all the details and they were like can we email you what happened we don't have any they don't have an email address Josh what BA yeah they don't have an email and I was like they don't think it's going to take off no pun intended not the only thing that's not taking off with BA am I right hey I do and then I said you don't have an email address and I went I said do you want me to write it all down on Instagram and then they didn't reply I went are you ghosting me you made the because they messaged me I went are you ghosting me you made the first move this is unbelievable and I went do you have a fax number so they don't have an email address and then I said I was going to but I was going to write if it's easier I can tell my friend all about it and record it as a podcast and send you the link

36:18anyway We're waiting to see what they say, but the bag should be arriving at 10.30. Oh, God. Bit of a ball ache. It's not all rock and roll. It's not all rock and roll, Rob. It's not all rock and roll. I've got a couple of other things as well, right? Yeah. Is it interesting to have recommendations of where we went to in Lisbon? Do anyone care? I'll take one. I'll take the top three. You know, potentially, and this will probably be once summer's over and maybe next year, we're going to do more episodes, a bit more deep dive ones and subjects. Do you reckon it's worth doing, like, destination ones?

36:46Yeah, I think that is worth it. And we can do that and you can talk about it as a couple and as with kids. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. We'll log that then. We'll do that another time. But one thing you've got to do if you go to Lisbon, yeah, obviously the custard tart. I mean, it's not a hot tip, but I'll tell you, we went for the custard tart, which was outrageous. The pastel donata. Oh, the pastel donata. But the place we went to, because the really popular place you see on TikTok is the original place where they first made them. You don't want to go to the place on TikTok though, do you? You don't want to go to that one.

37:15No. The place you want to go to, I'll tell you it, is called this was the one that a local took us to and it was absolutely outrageous it's called fabrica danata fabrica and how many did you have don't go to the one in belém massive queues go to fabrica f-a-b-r-i-c-a danata go there and then the other place you want to go to josh for a pork roll for a bifana i don't want to go for pork oh my god go to bifana's do affonso bifana's d-o b-i-f-a-n-a-s-d-o-a-f-o-n-s-o oh my god outrageous little pork roll bit of chili oil on it and mustard i know you can't eat that because you're a virgin i love the chili oil um the other thing i've got to tell you this about my friend's kid my friend's kid is going to secondary school okay yeah obviously there's a lot of parents out there now with kids going to secondary school don't fancy it incredibly stressful don't fancy it myself make no bones about it i say pound for pound even more so than your first job or uni i think the move from nursery to primary is nothing compared with the move from primary to secondary because also your defenses are down because when your kid gets to 11 in year six they're confident they're the big fish in a small pond also the whole thing about primary is the teachers all like yeah yeah we're just like letting them kind of you know we're we're all about kindness and we're all about do you know what i mean also in secondary school the scum you know the horrible scum they're sort of tearaways and a little bit cheeky at primary school but when they get to secondary they pube up and go full scum there's no real and i'm sure this wrong but there's no real and i'm referring to the kids here there's no real at primary school but you know that there is at secondary school that you can see them developing yeah the scum is growing but they really mature At my secondary school, I'm not going to be around the bush, there was some fucking psychopaths in there.