S13 EP1: Hotdogs for Breakfast

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19:49Oh, can I ask you a question? Yeah. So we come back from holiday, had no food. So I looked in the freezer and I got out some hot dog buns and sausages, defrosted them because we had no food for breakfast. In the morning, we had hot dogs. Well, that's what I'm saying. We had hot dogs for breakfast. Right. Feels mental. Feels like, what the hell are you doing? It does feel odd.

20:11Josh Widdicombe:But then you would have bread and you would have sausage. I mean, it's a sausage sandwich in a tube, isn't it? Yeah, exactly. Hot dogs for breakfast seems insane. Did you have ketchup? Yeah, I had mustard. You had mustard? That's a bit weird for the morning, isn't it? Whoa. Do you know what? I'm sure Jamie Oliver always has chilli on his breakfast because it gives him a boost. A boost in the morning? Like, because chilli does something to you, like it gets your adrenaline going or whatever like that. Do you know what I mean? So you might have got the same thing off the mustard. Yeah, I was buzzing.

20:42I felt really good. Good start to the day. Quick hot dog out the door. Yeah.

20:45Josh Widdicombe:Yeah. Quick hot dog out the door, up to Manchester. That was my morning. What? Are you in Manchester? No, you're not in Manchester. No, that was Saturday. Oh, right. I was going to say, what the fuck's going on? I was in Manchester. I got back off holiday Friday, went up to Manchester to do 8 out of 10 cats, let's count down, come back down, got in at 4am, then drove to my mum's birthday meal down in Sandwich. Are you all right with, you had a sandwich? No, no, it was in Sandwich. Oh, right, sorry. This sounds like a, it was a lovely afternoon, but the setup of where we had lunch sounds like something from like a Phoenix Knights or sitcom.

21:22So we went for lunch at the cafe of a wakeboarding center and inflatable water obstacle course with an Ed Sheeran tribute act.

21:34Josh Widdicombe:Incredible. But sorry, but you weren't doing wakeboarding or inflatable thing. You just wanted to use the cafe. uh yes it's for my mom and dad's birthday meal and there was like 15 beckett's they got a connection to sandwich they they live 10 minutes away about 10 50 minutes away um so that's why they went there and it's it was nice food it's a nice nice vibe but it's on paper it's a mad sell you know what i mean was the edge was the ed sheeran tribute act there for your mom no he He was there just, or she. Of course. Well, I don't think he was just Ed Sheeran. I think he did a lot of Ed Sheeran.

22:14He did other covers as well. Did he look like him? No, no. He was more doing covers, and a lot of them were Ed Sheeran, as opposed to, you know, bad clothes, terrible hair, smiley face. Yeah, yeah, of course. So he was singing, but he's there anyway at the weekend, I think. Right, right. It's a real experience where like Ed Sheeran's on and he's really good distributor. So he sounds a lot like him. And then there's a guy like doing three sixties on the wakeboard track and you're like tucking into some.

22:47Josh Widdicombe:What's a wakeboard? Wakeboard's like a tiny surfboard that you clamp your feet in like a snowboard. And then you normally hold onto the back of like, it's a bit like water skiing. Yeah. But like it's on one plank as it were. but this center is like you're on it you hold on to a bit of rope that goes around in a circle like a track if you know what i mean so imagine a massive moving anywhere yeah you you hold on to this thing and it goes around this big loop track that i could track around the pond and you hold on to that and then you can do what's it attached to like that's above your head it's like almost like a almost like a zip wire yeah yeah but it goes around in a big circle of the the sort of the edge of the pond and did you want to have a go well no you can have a go but that weightboarding one's quite an intense thing but the inflatable course we could have done with the kids but it wasn't it was only about 22 degrees and we were there for lunch on the hill well exactly and i don't want to do the inflatable course after having that chose but then before or we'd just be soaking wet eating nachos.

23:59Josh Widdicombe:You can't enjoy Galway Girl if you're soaking wet. Exactly. I've done all of them, actually. It's actually really good. They're the ones I can do. It's really good. It's really good tribute act. I just wasn't expecting it at a wakeboarding centre for my mum and dad's birthday. Of course. How old's your mum? My mum was 72. My dad was 82. Oh, happy birthday. My mum and sister, my auntie Tina, were on shots at three in the afternoon doing shots of baby Guinness. Fucking hell. What's baby Guinness? I'm sorry I don't know any of these things I'm unaware of everything that you've told me What's a nacho?

24:34I bet you don't like nachos It's a bit messy for you

24:37Josh Widdicombe:I do like nachos No I do like nachos No you don't like nachos You like tortilla crisps next to a pot of salsa No actually no You like it all big and messy I love melted cheese Do you? Yeah it's one of the reasons I love pizza One of the big two reasons I love pizza the other one's all done. What's the other one? The other one's done. Filt on tomato. It does a job. It does a job. In the sense that I will stay away from the area of the menu that's those white pizzas. So you wouldn't get involved in the white pizza? I always like the look. No, it's just cheese and toast really, isn't it? I feel like you're being ripped off.

25:14Josh Widdicombe:Make a barbecue sauce instead of tomato sauce, whichever. No, I don't want to mess with the classics. Yeah, fair enough. Most popular dish in the world, pizza, surely? Pizza or fries? Yeah, I think so. We went to a restaurant on Friday, Rob. Yeah. And there was, I've never been caught in this situation before because I'd always go pizza normally if it's an option. Well, always, wherever you are. If pizza's an option, I will always take it. Really? Yeah. I'd never go pasta. I think you're insane to go pasta if pizza's an option. Have I told you my burger rule? No. Burgers, I think, can vary so wildly.

25:58It's got me into a bit of a corner. I'll never eat a burger I've never eaten before. Oh, there you go. So I have to have had it once before, but then I can't find new burgers. So you're stuck now? You're stuck now? I'd have to have a really strong personal recommendation to order a burger somewhere.

26:13Josh Widdicombe:So what is in and out? Is there any biggies that you've never eaten that are causing problems? So I've had a patty and bun I've had, which I don't know if they're still going, but that was a good one um never had a bleaker burger feels like that's that they're a popular one i've never really dabbled with you've never had a bleaker burger or is that a little bit like bleaker street but i but if it's a shop that just does burgers i could be swayed because i'm like well they must know what they're doing whereas if i'm in like a random pub i'm going nowhere near that burger unless i've seen it arrive and i've watched someone eat it and i've spoken to them directly yeah do you know i was once in a pub uh in camden and i ordered a jacket potato and the guy behind the bar said i don't think we do food and i said i've got the menu here and then 15 minutes later he came out the kitchen he'd made the jacket potato And I was like, it's mental.

27:15Josh Widdicombe:This guy didn't even think there was a kitchen 15 minutes ago. Now he's the one making my jacket potato. What a story. How rarely does this happen? Well, I actually had a jacket potato at the wakeboarding centre. I love jacket potato. Well, jacket potato was on there. I didn't want a whole jacket potato. I wanted some nachos. So me and Lou said, why don't we get a tuna and cheese jacket potato and nachos and we'll share. That's why you're a couple. That's why it still works. Exactly. Guess what came out in my order of jacket potato? What do you mean? So tell me what was on my plate. I ordered jacket potato, tuna and cheese.

27:50A potato. Yeah.

27:53Josh Widdicombe:Some tuna. Yeah. Some cheese. Yeah. And then three pieces of cucumber and two pieces of lettuce and half a tomato. Yeah, pretty much that. But one thing you're missing was another whole potato with tuna and cheese. so you've got two jackpotatoes if you order if you order jacket potato off the menu you get two jackpotatoes you can't deal with that you can't expect it you've got i think you've got a sack that's a sharing platter had they heard your conversation with lou and they'd gone do you know what should we sneak him an extra jackpotato it was massive the portions no because everyone else had jackpotatoes got two jackpotatoes the portions are mental how big are the potatoes the usual size well my dad was going do you reckon they just really really work up an appetite wakeboarding it can't be I've never done enough exercise to go I do you know I need two jack potatoes and they were massive they were like proper like big as a coconut and was the was the filling ratio good massive I can eat it so was it so you had the filling for two as well yeah yeah what like filling for two on either one on both of them yeah Bloody hell.

29:05Anyway, I've never ordered a jack of potatoes and got two jack of potatoes before.

29:09Josh Widdicombe:No. No. I reckon or again. Will you go back there? Well, it was a four-hour round trip, so probably not. That's no offence to anything or anyone involved. It's a long way for two jack of potatoes. I'd rather stay nearby and have one. Of course. Or just order two. Yeah, and share it. You didn't even need that. You were there, Rob? I don't think anyone would say, you know, that would be too gauche from you to order two jacket potatoes. No, but I think even before I was earning, jacket potatoes were never really a sort of, you know, goal food for me. No, no. I think I've always been very privileged enough to be able to afford a jacket potato.

29:50I've always been in that realm. Quality of jacket will obviously vary, but I'd say at a bog standard level, I could always afford a jacket potato at certain points in my life, especially back in the uh you know teens 20 teens tell you tell you why they don't like a jacket rob

30:06Josh Widdicombe:newcastle yeah here we go here we go why are you boarding

30:15Josh Widdicombe:oh rob i've got to tell you about someone got angry with me i thought you'd enjoy this oh and i like it you don't get angry back do you not really no um so i was it was on the plane back from holiday in Greece yeah I went up to the toilet at the front yeah and there was a there was a queue right and then you know the front seats um there was someone on the window seat and then there was two empty seats right so I perched on the um the arm of the the the end undeadly empty seat yeah yeah and then um i looked down and my my shoe was undone yeah yeah so i put it up on the corner of that seat put the on the plastic sole of your shoe went on the seat yeah and then i'm fine i made a mistake the woman said excuse me that's my husband's chair i said fine put it down right okay the woman that was sat down at the end Yeah.

31:18Yeah. So she's having a go. You've said sorry. Hands up. I apologise. She doesn't accept the apology. In what regard?

31:25Josh Widdicombe:Can you say what she said? She tries to continue the telling off. I'll be you. I'll be you. I'll be you. You be her. I'm doing my shoelace. Excuse me. That's my husband's seat. Oh, sorry about that. I'll take my foot off. Because the thing is, if you're going to put your feet on the seat, oh yeah sorry it's that but she just carried on explaining so i just kind of turned and queued up then guy comes out the guy comes out the thing you worried about how big he is uh if i was to give you his build who's the guy who's the guy that cheated on lily allen that kind of build oh big old big guy big strong guy then yeah i got you but yeah but not in the way where you go he works out in the way where you go he's big in every way and in so i'm queuing up to go in he whacks me in the back like goes past me like he's go sit down and then he does you know like richard ashcroft in the urban hymns kind of he walks back towards the toilet yeah like a footballer off the ball no like an argentinian defensive midfielder yeah and then he goes past me and he goes did you put your foot on my seat oh what so he barges into you and to get in front of you yeah to to get some napkins to wipe down the seat how old is this twat oh i've got a photo of him actually i took a photo send it down send it down and i want to look at him as i rip him apart because this bloke's a fucking it gets worse rob and then the he's so angry what did you say i said i'm sorry you know you just like i said sorry you know it's all i can do he won't accept he sits down with his napkins that um the air steward obviously has to go over and check he's all right oh absolutely yeah yeah and then the air steward comes back and he's like god there's one on every flight isn't there i like confides in me i obviously think this is my chance to dig in yeah i start laughing away with the air steward in full you've got a big laugh as well yeah i really i really go for it in the charming chat with the air steward all of them i just really just you're oh yeah also by the way at that point a woman comes up uh to say she's a fan of me absolutely perfect timing i was like this is glorious then later in the flight i come out the toilet yeah the woman's still staring at me even as i walk down the aisle she cranes her neck over her seat to kind of evil me as i walk down i've said sorry at this point all i've done is say sorry yeah an hour later i know it's an hour later because they're delivering drinks i two hair stewards talking.

34:19Josh Widdicombe:One of them goes, he's still cleaning his seat with a napkin. And the other one goes, it's been an hour.

34:33Josh Widdicombe:It was mad. Oh my God. What is that then? Well, obviously he might be germaphobic or OCD or something like that. So, you know. We'll get a fucking private jet there. yeah but yeah there will be other people on this plane so so let's be honest an air conditioned plane with 200 people and it's not ideal because it can't it was so weird because if he honestly i i was at the end i was also like oh god is he going to confront me as we get off but he was one of those guys but you know the person who when you get off yeah when the moment you stand up he was up and straight to the front so that he could be the first out even though he's in the front row he was basically yeah but then he had to wait so long at the um for his case because there's two things one is like his egos being like sort of challenged by you putting your foot on his seat also the germs only gonna go on his like jeans or his shorts oh some people are mad don't they it was so but you know what it made me go do you remember when i said to that guy what's this really about yeah write it if you've got any what's this really about because that felt to me like a real classic um yeah that one yeah what's this really about that's a good little sexy what's going on here yeah why have you done that why are you so angry at me because i've apologized i all right that is a mistake that i've totally accepted i haven't gone i'll put my foot where i fucking want love do you know what i mean yeah you've not gone back on it's only the corner why are you being so uppity you've immediately apologized yeah i do a weird thing happened to me at the we was at the buffet of the hotel right yeah and um i put some toastings i four slices of toast there's two toasters right with four four gaps in one one side of the this bench and there's one the other side of this bench right anyway so i put four slices toast in for us me and the kids you know i go away come back go in front of me just pops up my toast takes it that's not on That's not on.

36:36Josh Widdicombe:I've never seen that in my life. You're not going to argue for your own. He thinks that there's just a constant toast going through. I don't know. But he thinks that. The service is so good that they're constantly filling the toaster and you can come and take the toast. Also, there's four options of bread. There's like white brown sourdough and then like some gluten-free one. So it's like, hang on. How do you even know you want that one? Maybe it's happened to him, Rob. Maybe it's continuing. I was just stood there going, he's stealing my toast. And did you think to step in? No. One, I was in shock because I've been in a lot of – I've been in a lot of hotel buffets.

37:17Never seen it. Never seen that in my life. I've had people being a bit annoyed they're waiting or a bit like that, but never someone that just walks home. But I'd gone off to get other bits, so I'd left it unattended because it takes longer to do. But then I thought, do I say something? But I'm like, no, I don't want to be that guy. It's like, there's loads of bread. Yeah. I had nothing to do that day. Just got to lie in the sun for a bit. Exactly.

37:40Josh Widdicombe:Exactly. You're on holiday. Who cares? At the end of the day. I'm going to go and toast myself. Oh, can I say for the holiday thing, the blue marigold, big blue, basically big blue glove for the arm. Yeah. It does work and it saved the holiday. however on day five it did start leaking it got a bit stretched so i would suggest if you've got the money take more than one blue marigold how much was it like 20 quid or something i mean it worth it for what it got yeah of course yeah um so i would i would double up because you're in a situation where you can't but also my daughter did then invent a way to save it so if if you've got a leak it slightly leaking blue marigold she then tied a t-shirt around the top of her cast so that any water that got in would then get soaked up by the t-shirt that was so a t-shirt over the cast and then a marigold over the t-shirt respect

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40:25also as well i know we mentioned it before but my kids the neado situation at security my kids uh we've got into neados yeah so the they they stop them at security and it takes ages and i told my kids not to pack any they packed them anyway so both bags got searched and sometimes they will take them away from you yes if you've got a horrible thingy and you do not want a crying kid with no neado on the way out no no exactly good point very good point good point thanks Thanks, everyone. Anything else going on? What's your... Have you got a chilled summer? What's going on with you? Well, we've got a wall chart.

41:02Yeah.

41:04Josh Widdicombe:World Cup wall chart. We've got a world... Oh, don't... I've said that's over. Can I talk... Can I... You can veto this. Can I read out the text you sent about possibly going to the final and the reasons you shouldn't go? Yeah, go on. We can always believe it if it's too... So basically, I was in Greece and I was coming back on the Friday. I had work on the Saturday, but I could get to the World Cup final if England made it by flying out Sunday morning at 7.30am to get in at 10.30am. Now, I had a flight held just in case England got to the World Cup finals. I thought I had to be there. But by doing that, I had to cancel and change a lot of things.

41:45And I was just texting Josh about it.

41:49Josh Widdicombe:Okay, so you've put, I can get a ticket for the final. Not sure to go or not if we make it. Would fly out 7.30am on the day of the final. I'd have to cancel loads of work stuff. Everyone would hate me. I'd have to watch France win 3-0, which proved very incorrect on both counts. I have a prediction, that. Yeah. It would be my fourth final defeat in the row. Plus, I'd say England v France would be the biggest underdog out of those finals. What are you cancelling? Filming. Someone's flying in from Geneva to do the filming. And then you've put, I'm in two minds. I would also miss my parents' lunch on Sunday and a date night with Lou on Monday.

42:37Josh Widdicombe:That's tonight. Might just make it an event at home with the Lou and the girls and a couple of friends. I've been to America three times this year already. As well as Malaysia and China. it's July. I'm currently in Greece. I went to Dubai for a gig and I'm off to France and Germany in two weeks for a road trip for the TV. F-ing Nora. I'm going to combust, I think so. Day later, I've booked my plane.

43:12I'm a nightmare. I just can't. I can't say

43:18Josh Widdicombe:throughout that conversation I thought there's no doubt he's going there's no doubt I can't it's not FOMO as much I just sort of my mentality is we're here for such a short amount of time if you've got the capability or the ability to go and do something you can do just Burnham's in now we'll sort it out did you see his speech going yeah it's a nightmare we've had six prime ministers in ten years you've not fucking helped that

43:49Josh Widdicombe:was there part of you when we lost a small part of you that thought at least i don't have to go to why don't you know that choice is no longer yeah no i i think as well france or spain i think england would have lost yes if we got there do you know i mean i just i just think them you know our defense is too leaky and they're both so good attacking wise yeah and well no we did beat France in the third place playoff but that wasn't a normal game was it that was like a freak game imagine if that had been the final I mean I don't want to talk about football and I don't know when this is going out but the fact Saka was fully fit and never got brought on makes my rage I can't let's not do this I go to sadness I only go to rage with England with Arsenal I'm a bit more acceptance what it is yeah i'd say because i don't think i went to i didn't go to arsenal as a kid with my family my dad and that and it didn't feel so viscerally real i used to watch on the tv but england games were such a big event growing up there'd be all different family and friends around and a lot of tears and stress and crying and all that so it feels more real so um anyway anyway we'll save that well let's do you know what rob i've got to tell you where i watched it could i I'll just, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, go on.

45:08Josh Widdicombe:Because I need to tell you where I watch the games. We're in a nice result, right, in Greece, but it was like not, because it's a nice fancy result. It was an all-inclusive, but like, I don't really have TVs. There's a TV in the room, but the TV, when I tried to watch the France-Spain game, kept on glitching. And I think it was a connectivity issue because everyone was watching it. So if too many people are on one system, it can go glitching. I was like, I can't roll the dice for the England game here because I watched the Norway one on an iPad in my bedroom. yes oh right so this was the semi-final against argentina argentina so i'm like i had the same one with the norway one you went to a hotel bar didn't you yeah because the tv was in the room where my family was asleep yeah well my tv wasn't working properly so anyway for the argentina one they went oh we're putting a bigger tv out down by the beach there's more space i went there at nine o 'clock game was 10 o 'clock rammoed not not barely places to stand don't mind watch it and i'm like i can't deal with this this is too much and also because i was just milling about there's a lot of people i couldn't really chat to the kids because they wanted to they were chatting to me because i'm off the tv and all that and i thought i can't deal with this so anyway i went up to the because this is what i struggle with in fantasy results i always feel like i've got more in connection with the people working there than the people staying there i made a friend i made a nice friend who she was a listener of the podcast yeah um shout out to meg she was a guest and she got to watch the norway game in exchange for her husband was going to go out for the semi-final and go because they had two kids so he was doing the kids for this one and then um she was gonna do the kids for the semi-final we were the same level of caring but there was like Norway fans it was quite fun but we weren't like the furious angry but there was a guy who was just like Argentina and Norway they're different propositions to play against I know I know there's a guy next to us when and I know he messed up in the Argentina game but you know against Norway yeah they they made a substitution this guy just goes oh he's got his favorites hasn't he and I thought yeah because it's a football squad he has got his face that's so He hasn't brought 26 players of the same ability.

47:25Josh Widdicombe:I'm going to pick 24 people. We'll keep on Drew Bellingham because he's better than all the other players. He's my favourite. That's why I picked him. I'll just talk about that. I'll just tell you to go. So I asked someone, look, it's too busy. Where would you watch the game in the local town? You went, go to Breeze Bar. It's a bar called Breeze Bar. I'd go, that does not sound like the right recommendation. I knew it was. I knew it was. I knew immediately it was the right one, right? So anyway, I get a cab. This is nine o 'clock. I go, right, who wants to go on an adventure? Get 100 euros out of cash point.

48:00Boom, we're in a cab.

48:02Josh Widdicombe:Sorry, is your whole family going to Breeze Bar? Yeah, with iPads. Anyway, we're in the car. Lou's well up for Breeze Bar, right? Yeah, yeah, of course. I quite like a normal bar. What times kick off in Greece? 10 p.m. 10 p.m., okay. I'm in a cab to Breeze Bar. We get to Breeze Bar. We sit there. Anyway, the geezer from the resort says, I've messaged the owner. I'll get there. He's like, Mr. Rob, come this way. I'm treated like a king. He puts me upstairs because it's downstairs with a few English tourists, but he went always upstairs. So he went upstairs, massive air con unit, right in front of the TV.

48:35Perfect. Got a drink. They come, give us food, drinks, kids have some chips. That's the breeze that gave them their name, presumably. Exactly. Old Breeze, beautiful. Right. Good food as well. Right in the front. Lovely. Sit down, enjoy it. A few Argentinians behind us, which is quite stressful. there's just the only people upstairs that are English next to me young couple in their 20s right lovely anyway me and him are cheering everyone else is like going anyway we lose it's awful and ironically the Argentinians went they went fuck you England that's because you didn't try and play football are you kidding that come back to buy them in the final absolutely dirge fest anyway so we lose it's midnight we leave Breeze Bar I've just realized that I'm in the middle of nowhere with 20 euros and no idea how to book a cab get a cab don't even know where we go your kids fine they've got ipad anyway as i'm coming out a couple of english people talk to me the 20 year old couple they're in there the 20 year old couple start chatting to them and i say do anyone i go um i need to get a cab you know how to get a cab he went i don't know i've driven i'm like we're in here this is good news like what oh we've driven we got a higher car have you and I was like, don't fancy dropping us back, dear.

49:55Anyway, Joe drove me home. They wouldn't let us in the hotel resort. I had to give them my name, my room number and a card. But it was a fun night out. We enjoyed it. Shame about the result. Apologies to Meg, Joe and Connie. Yeah, but you know.

50:07Josh Widdicombe:She's doing small business. Hi, Rob, Josh and Michael. Long, long time listener navigating full-time work on summer holidays over here. Having heard Rob talk about how he's trying to get good at golf, to go on golf holidays, I'd love a small business shout up from my friend Jamie and Golf Sherpa who may just be able to help. As a toddler dad with a full-time job, Jamie launched Golf Sherpa as a side hustle in 2025 after years of organizing golf holidays for friends. Golf Sherpa is a golf management service that saves golfers time and money by designing and delivering unforgettable golf experiences, handling bookings and logistics before an event and an app to manage the competition in real time.

50:49Josh Widdicombe:Jamie and golf Sherpa colleagues, Stephen and Ben have already taken the golf world by storm, securing partnerships with some top golf hospitality venues and having made it to the finals entrepreneurial competition, Scottish edge and the heat visit golf Sherpa.co.uk or golf underscore Sherpa on Instagram. Thanks so much. Harriet in Bearsden pronounced bears den. Yes, really. I got it right. Near Glasgow. Hello, you shmexy shmexy slags. I'd like to shout out a small business in Coventry, Urban Sandwich. The sandwiches are next level with bread made fresh daily, seed oil free, stacked with flavour, also delicious.

51:29They're based in West Orchards, Coventry and well worth a visit. The main chef has been through a tricky couple of years and I'm sure he'd appreciate a few extra customers. They do hot and cold sarnies and breakfast flatbreads at good prices. The Insta is urban underscore sandwich underscore Coventry. Tara, Ducks. Hannah. There you go. Urban sandwich. Let's get involved. Josh, would you like to play golf with me? Nine holes, not 18, I'd say. How about we play nine and then finish on the 10th, if you know what I'm saying? Oh, here we go. Someone's a lot of there.

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