"Close To Home" Freddie Flintoff on Ricky Hatton Cause of Death & Surviving Horror Crash

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1:00You had this horrific crash, but you've survived. I did think I was dead, and I thought, is this what it is when you die? I got dragged out and under the car, and I'd taken a big impact, and I couldn't feel, but I couldn't see it. I didn't think I had a face. From being pleased I was still there, it turned into fear pretty quickly.

1:27We knew you'd survive, but then you kind of disappeared. How important was your family? I'm sure it wasn't easy. You know, I'd cry a lot, I'd get snappy, I'd get angry. It was a mess. But Rachel was strong. She had to be for both of us. I think you realise what's important and you realise how fragile, I suppose, life can be as well. I'm still figuring it out, please. Do you drive now? Yeah, I've only been driving about four months. Just being sat behind the wheel and getting all them thoughts back. It was an adjustment to begin with. To physically see you again is actually... it's a great feeling.

1:56Yeah, probably one of the few people here said the feeling's mutual.

2:02For the record, who did piss in the garden at number 10 Downing Street? F*** was it? Fantastic! Well, British viewers need no introduction to Andrew Freddie Flintoff, an undisputed sporting legend. Australians probably know him as more of a sporting tyrant after a string of unforgettable performances, an iconic rivalry. Even our US audiences will remember his second coming as a Top Gear star. However, they were allegedly offered subtitles to help navigate his very, very northern accent. Well, Fred's new book, Coming Home, The Moments That Made Me, is an instant classic in many ways. I'm delighted to say he joins us in the studio now.

2:44I'm actually delighted to see you. Thank you. Because I have not seen you since your accident. No. So we've known each other for 20 years or so now and obviously communicated a lot, but to physically see you again is actually... It's a great feeling. Yeah, probably one of the few people here said the feeling's mutual. Thanks, Fred. How are you? Yeah, I'm all right. It's been an adjustment over the past few years. Obviously, with the accident, it was one thing. And getting over that, whether you actually truly get over it, I'm not quite sure. Do you think you ever will? I don't know. I'm accepting of it now.

3:21With what happened, I suffered from PTSD. I had flashbacks and nightmares, but I've probably got more of an acceptance of them now. But I suppose the biggest thing it did do was brought me back to cricket. And obviously with family and friends and cricket have been the things that now have probably helped me more than anything. There's an amazing thing at the start of your book where you talk about your cricket instincts, honed from facing, you know, 95, 100-mile-an-hour fast bowlers where you literally have to rely on your instinct to get you out of trouble, where you get hit. And you have that instinct as the car's rolling.

4:01I'm not going to labour the crash because I know you don't want to overly talk about that. You don't need to. You've done it. But that moment when those instincts kicked in, can you remember that vividly? Yeah, because one of the things about the crash was I was knocked unconscious. So I remember everything about it. And it was in a car where I was exposed from pretty much here up and no helmet on. And as it went over, it was like I've got a decision I need to make here. And I can only relate it to batting at cricket and probably American viewers of baseball, how fast it is. So if someone's bowling around 90 mile an hour, you've got 0.4 of a second.

4:41and in that.4 of a second, you've got to decide where the ball's going to go, if it's going to swing, you've got to get your feet in the right place, your body, you've got to think about where you're going to hit it. And I think in some ways, having them instincts saved me, so I had a decision I had to make. I thought if I get hit sideways, I'll break my neck. So I just turned and looked at the floor and braced myself and shook my eyes and took my left arm out, because they say, keep your arms in the car, because you might lose one. But I thought I'm right-handed, so I just gripped tight with my right hand and tried to brace a little bit with my left one.

5:12Thinking you might lose your arm? Possibly, yeah. So, you know, and I got dragged out and under the car and it turned out, obviously, not ideal, but I was alive. And possibly in that moment, that's probably what saved me. So I'm thankful for that. And then also, probably as well, I was obviously a supporter of family and friends, but I think cricket has played a massive part latterly in getting me back into life almost. That moment when you know you're not dead, when you've had this horrific crash, but you've survived, is that moment, albeit briefly, is it a moment of euphoria? Or did you instantly think, well, I may have survived, but I'm in real trouble here?

5:56I think two things. Initially, I did think I was dead, because I couldn't see anything. I was just in darkness. And I thought, is this it? is I'm just going to be like this in darkness is this what it is when you die but I had a hat on and the hat had got in love with my eyes so I pulled it up and I was like I know I'm on the Top Gear track and then initially I suppose please but then fear because I knew that I'd taken a big impact and I could feel what had happened but I couldn't see it so my initial thought was actually checked on my body I can still feel everything although I've done my wrist and a couple of ribs but then I didn't think I had a face that was the hardest bit is like I don't know what I look like here is my face still on that runway of what's left of it and I suppose from being pleased I was still there turned into fear pretty quickly about what the lasting impact yeah I just couldn't I didn't know what I looked like I didn't know what I'd done to myself and then all of a sudden the pain started you know the pain started and the blood started pouring was it just agony agony it was no i was bust open all the way around here just open and it was minus two so it was like burning my face was freezing it was yeah i just wanted to get up and walk and just get away or just close my eyes and this is this hasn't happened i remember the news breaking and like everyone that knows you obviously complete horror what i was hearing and then you kind of, we knew you'd survive, but then you kind of disappeared.

7:33You didn't really respond, I think, really just more than just a handful of people. Through that period of quite a few months, what was going through your head then about why you just felt like you had to kind of cocoon yourself? I got air ambulance to the hospital and the care I got at the hospital at St George's was incredible. You know, I know the NHS and things are under pressure and get scrutiny but the people they were incredible you know the care and the compassion they showed me and then when i left there after about a week 10 days i went home and i think as the painkillers started wearing off on the drugs i think that's when it really started for me and i couldn't i just found myself getting up in the morning sitting in the same room from 10 o 'clock till midnight not wanting to see anything not wanting to speak to anyone um you know there's cameras outside my house all the time which didn't help but it was just I see for the first time it was I I didn't want to die but I didn't know if I had it in me to carry on so it was tough and the only times I left the house actually was for medical appointments so I come down to London I go and see the surgeon or the dentist to get some teeth or whoever I to see and then I go to the office Richard Thompson our mutual friend mutual friend who runs the agency I'm with the Mecca thing of it so get some nice food in and have an hour just eating and chatting to people and that's when Rob Key who's my boss and one of my best mates I saw him for the first time I just didn't want to face the world I found comfort at home in a room.

9:11How important was your family because you're very very tight with your family I know a lot of your family how important were they to help steer you out of what must have been incredibly negative thought processes all day every day yeah massively because one of the things you want is is like they carry on almost as best they can it was me who was sat there I'm sure I was I wasn't easy you know I'd cry a lot I'd get snappy I get angry the kids are incredible I think you know I've seen I did the documentary Rachel warned them about what I was coming about like. Just carry on. Kids are actually very resilient, aren't they?

9:50More than you maybe think. Yeah. I think that, you know, it probably just, it didn't affect them probably the way you feared it might. Well, I had a laugh at Corey because we got doorstepped by the press and he did a mini press conference. It was the younger one because he'd have been pressed and he'd have been, what, two, two and a half at the time. And he wouldn't come near me to begin with because I was a mess. It's all good now. But Rachel was strong, I suppose. she had to be for both of us. So, no, they were incredible. Mum and dad are just always there. Your parents are brilliant. Yeah. What was your mum's, I mean, I can only imagine my mother in that kind of situation.

10:28How was your mum about it? Yeah, it was interesting, didn't it? Because I come from, obviously, the north, a northern family. And one of the things, my dad, it's like, you get on with things, don't you? It's like, come on. And not really mentioning it, just trying to carry on as normal as possible. Was that helpful? Yeah, yeah. But then almost as well, I think, I don't really know. It was, I found it quite hard being around them or being around people because I could see the impact it had on them, you know, as a mother seeing her son in that position. And she's seen me in a lot of positions and states over the years, but nothing like this.

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12:14I think one of the main things is I think you realise what's important and you realise how fragile, I suppose, life can be as well and how it can turn in an instant. Like that. Yeah, and I want to enjoy it. And it's not always been that easy for me at times. And, you know, it's going back to, you know, obviously the family are incredible, spending as much time as I can with them and my friends, but then also doing things that I actually want to do and be more present. Do you have a bucket list now of actual stuff? No. I don't think I ever have because I'm never quite sure what's going to happen next.

12:48And I've done things and been places and seen things that I never knew existed, never mind having a bucket list. But I suppose the one thing is I'm more present. So I don't know about you, Piers, but I think a lot of the time, especially with TV or cricket, you're always looking to the next thing or what's the next job or where am I going next? And you don't actually allow yourself to just enjoy yourself right now. So I think that's a big driver. But, yeah, I'm still figuring it out, be as far as. In the book, you go back over, obviously, cricket career. I'm delighted to say I make some appearances at your more notable moments.

13:24And actually, one of them really is notable moments. It's 2009. It's the last time you play for England. It's at Lord's, the most hallowed turf in cricket history. And you take five wickets for England. It's an amazing way to end playing for your country. And I happened to just have the fortune to have dinner with you that night with our wives. And we went to a pub. We had a fantastic time. We had red wine, Guinness. He talked about it in the book. And he had a great time. I remember the paparazzi coming out. And it was just hilarious, classic, I would say, Freddie Flintoff night. And then not long after that, you sort of decided, I'm done with drinking.

14:03Yeah. And I remember thinking, I've had a lot of fun with you with alcohol over the years. and you just made a call and you stuck with it. I mean, you've been clean for how long now? A long time now, years. How long? I think 10, nine, 10 years. Right. And I would never have thought you could do that. What was the catalyst for you to say, I'm actually done with this? Because I used to enjoy it, obviously. Yeah, I did. And, you know, that night, it was a punch bowl pub, wasn't it? Yeah, it was, yeah. It made for you. Guy at Richie's place. There was about 30 paparazzi outside after us and you went out in all your glory.

14:38Here I am, here I am. And they were like, actually, we're here for Frank, would you mind getting out of the way? No, I think it's not so much to drink, I suppose. I think it's the reasons I was drinking. You know, I had some great times, you know, in Ashes and games and going out with mates and nights like that. But then it was more understanding why I was drinking at times, whether it's to change your mood or try and create a reaction. Especially after I retired, because at 31, is everything I wanted to do and everything. And then all of a sudden I've got nothing to do. And, you know, I suppose there's no coincidence that actually I got back on track once I stopped and then started building another career and doing other things.

15:20You look incredibly fit and well. Do you ever get a yearning for a drink? Or is that it now? Do you think you're done for that? Yeah, I see it sometimes. I'm like, I'd be nice now, wouldn't it? And it's not something where I say never again. We'll just see. But at the minute, I'm trying to get fit. I'm working with the Lions, like England's next generation, and we're going to Australia in a few weeks' time. So I'm getting fit. I'm going to take my shirt off around the pool. You talk very honestly about mental health in the book. And again, when I first got to know you 20-odd years ago, you had the kind of persona of Freddie Flintoff, which became iconic in the 2005 Ashes, which was all shown on network television here, which made a big difference, I think, to the level of fame you guys enjoyed in that period.

16:11But then I was told by a few people that knew you really well, you know, there are two Flintoffs, right? There's Freddie Flintoff and there's Andrew Flintoff. His family call him Andrew. They don't call him Freddie. Freddie's like this kind of slightly caricature person. I mean, how accurate was the fact that there were basically two of you? Yeah, it is. I remember 16 years of age being a professional cricketer for the first time and going into a dressing room at Lancashire full of internationals and men. And at school, I was quiet. You had to be at the school I went to. I played cricket. It was like Billy Elliot playing cricket in the north of England where I grew up.

16:48So when I went in the dressing room, I realised actually I'm not going to survive this and then started getting a bit of success. It was actually drinking initially. So when I was a bit older than that, we went on a tour and we were playing drinking games and I had to do it with coke and I had next about eight pints of coke and it was horrible. It was like, just give it that Guinness, let's try it with the Guinness. And all of a sudden I could do that and everyone was like, wow, look at this fella. And all of a sudden I was one of the gang and it's probably developed from there. But sport is incredible, it's not normal.

17:22You get the chance to walk out in front of 30 ,000 people at Lourdes or the Oval and you can be whoever you want to be. And you walk out and you want to give the impression that you're bulletproof and you've got it under control and you enjoy the crowd and you go with them. You don't always feel like that, but I think that was like playing a character. It's almost like an actor. For American viewers, where did the Freddie nickname come from? Flintstone. So the coach, a fellow called John Stanlath, he was coaching the second team at Lancashire and he just called me Fred as in relation to Fred Flintstone and it stuck and I don't mind it to be honest it's alright, it just gets hard when you get older so you're going on the school drop off or you're going and I'm not quite sure what to introduce myself as and someone called me Andrew and I'll just ignore him and I actually realised that's my name rather than Fred What do you prefer being called now?

18:15I quite like Fred The public presumably call you Fred Yeah, it's fine. It's all good. And then you get interviewed by Sean as Fred, but Andrew, there's a few people. My mum, my dad, my wife. Steve Armisen, one of my teammates. David Lloyd, one of my coaches. And Keezy calls me Trevor. Why Trevor? It's his middle name. There's another, actually very poignant now, given what's happened since the book was published. You talk about coming to L.A. when I was there and we saw each other. And so I was in L.A. filming and I popped in to see Piers Morgan. And then you add, I think unnecessarily, I know, I know.

19:00No, it's too easy. It's OK. It's OK. I moved past it because I wanted a media perspective, how the press writes about mental health. And you were doing a documentary. It was a really good documentary about mental health. And you said, when I was there, Piers says, have you spoken to Vinnie Jones? because I knew Vinny very well. He lived out there. Amazing success story in movies, having been a big football star and hot carry originally, but gone through a lot of very difficult things in his life, including, you know, in later years, the very sad death of his wife. And you rang him up and he said, yeah, come around.

19:33We've got to be done by 7.30. It's poker night, which is true. He used to play poker with all these movie stars and stuff. But when you saw Vinny, for example, What kind of perspective could he give you about mental health that really resonated? I think because you put me onto him and then I phoned him up. And I was nervous about phoning Vinnie Jones up. You know, it's Vinnie Jones. Obviously, he's got his movie side, which we've all seen. He was part of the crazy gang at Wimbledon. And you got this persona of what someone's going to be like. He's this big, hard fella. And I phoned him up and he couldn't have been more nice.

20:10He said, yeah, yeah, come over, come over. I was in his kitchen and we were setting up. And then he's so engaging and he's so articulate and he was talking about his troubles. And then you realise, actually, this can happen to anyone, even, like, the strongest person that you ever think. It's not like mental health, it's not selective on who it picks. It can hit anyone. And rightly or wrongly, I took some comfort in the fact that Vinnie Jones was able to talk so well and so openly about it. And it made me feel a bit more at ease about some of the things that I've been through. And, you know, we've seen it all over now, and unfortunately I'm going to Ricky Atton's funeral.

20:52I was going to mention Ricky because you give a lot of credit to Ricky for helping you with your mental health stuff. And you say, you know, you're filming a documentary for BBC, that's the one we're talking about, The Hidden Side of Sport, He said, I've always liked Ricky. Our careers run alongside each other. He's this proper fighter, all hearts and guts, but also really warm, funny, vulnerable. So when he talked about his struggles, it floored me. He opened up, and with that meaning to, so did I. I think that was the moment I realised I wasn't just presenting the thing. I was in it. I thought that was so powerful when it happened.

21:26But now we have this appalling situation where Ricky has taken his life. He's obviously, you know, he talked honestly about maybe doing that before. How did you feel when you heard what had happened? He's quite close to home in a lot of ways. Ricky, one of the great men. I met him years ago. We did a thing for Sky Sports and I went on the pads and he started hitting me. And I was a fan as well. So you've got Ricky, he's charming, he's funny. Our careers ran parallel with each other at the height at the same time. I went to his fights against Costa Zoo and all these, and had nights out in the press club in Manchester and we'd sung karaoke together.

22:11And I'd never knew all these things that he was struggling with until we sat down. And when we started talking, obviously, he was so honest about what he'd been going through and how he felt. And then as he was talking, I was, like, relating to it. I was like, I see, I've felt like that. That's what I've been like. And then it just turned into a chat between two blokes being really honest. And I suppose that documentary changed and I wasn't going to give as much away about myself, but then felt obliged to actually, if he's doing this. And, you know, the similar things that we talked about Vinny, this working class hero from Manchester, he goes into the ring, he fights all heart.

22:53He's funny. You see him doing stand-up routines at press conferences. And he feels like this. and then obviously what's happened over the past two weeks has been devastating for obviously his friends, his family but also anyone who's been in contact with Ricky. I've been in contact with his manager, Speakey and obviously he's broken. When did you last see him or speak to him? I sat with him a while ago on a train. I got on a train and we sat together all the way back up to Manchester, quite unexpected. I think it's like all these things. When something like that happens and you speak and everyone says he seemed fine, he seemed all right, he was looking forward to fighting in the next few weeks out in Dubai, there's almost a guilt upset.

23:42It's like how people didn't know. And the one thing I've found in recent years, over the past few years, it's happened to more and more people. You know, we were Graham Thorpe in cricket, who's an absolute great man, someone who is thought of so dearly by everyone he played with and everyone he's coached and you know you just feel like i thought he would have known but you know it's it's terrible today's show is sponsored by oxford natural makers of the optimum day and optimum night all-natural supplements thousands of brits and americans are already taking them with incredible results optimum day boosts your energy and supports weight loss throughout the day optimum night helps you relax and get deep refreshing sleep.

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25:56I am jubilant at this news I'm not going to pretend otherwise I mean, that's a massive bonus You want to play him with him in, don't you? Well, that's the interesting thing Because in 05, you guys took on the best of the best But then McGrath got injured Yeah, but that's the thing. He was so happy. Exactly. He stood on a cricket ball and then we're all looking over. It feels a bit like that this time. Their talisman, their captain, their leader, their best bowler has basically done the Glenn McGrath. Yeah, I'm sure that in some ways the lads will be looking at that smiling, but then others will think, we do want to play against the best side.

26:29And Pat Cummins, he's incredible, isn't he? He's led that side as a bowler. But looking at the two teams, it's going to be so good. It's probably a 50-50 game, isn't it? What do you make of this England team? What do you make of the way we play? Because in a way, your mate Rob Keyes, fantastic guy, Baz McCollum, the coach, Ben Stokes, very much a Flintoff warrior type of all-rounder. What they've cultivated is a team that plays basically in your image, right? It's aggressive, it's attacking, it's got flair, it never takes a step back, it's always on the front foot. I mean, it's a Flintoff mentality.