The Assassin, The Count Of Monte Cristo, The Gone, and The Mayfair Witches

25:08Pilot TV Hosts:No, it won't be that much. It'll be a minimum a year, maximum a year. Well, no, from now. A year from when it airs. It'll be there till September. Yeah, but that's on you guys for watching it too early, right? But what I'm saying is, we've got a big old wait for that, but that one looks even better. Yes. No, I thought it looks even better. I thought the trailer for the next season looks incredible. It does. That looks like the best season ever. So without any judgment of the season that us two watch, Fabulous. Scratuitously. The trailer is brilliant. You too. And I watched it like three times.

25:42Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, my God. This looks incredible. Yeah. It's one of the best things on TV, and I delight in it. Very smiley. Genuinely, it made my weekend. I had such a good time. I had such a good time. And I have also watched Alien Earth, which we'll be reviewing on the live show, because it's out that week. Yeah, I've got those ready to watch. I think I'm going to watch them this weekend. Yeah. Kate's running scared from Alien. but alien based sci-fi horror what's the problem it's all my favourite things yeah it is all your favourite things what a treat for the life what is your problem what is your problem what is your problem what is your problem no I'm looking forward to it because as Alien is you know what Alien is the original Alien the first Alien is it your favourite film of all time it's one of my favourite is it pronounced is it pronounced A-Len is that what you're going to say Aline it is one of my favourite films of all time genuinely and if you really want to provoke an argument you know what you do with Alien K go on You say to James...

26:35Oh, here we go. You say... Have another wrong opinion.

26:37Pilot TV Hosts:Anyone who, in their right mind, knows that Alien, the original, is better than Aliens, the sequel. I mean, it's not, but sure. But if you're James Dyer, Aliens, the sequel, is literally your favourite film of all time. Do you know what? And you will brook no compromise. No. Do you know what? Usually I would fully endorse poking the bear, but on this occasion, because it's film, and because I have no interest in that film... Just shutting it down. I'm just shutting it down. It's just an FYI. No, it's good. I would like to add it to the arsenal of things to tease him about. No, but I mean, this is interesting because we're going to be watching and reviewing Alien Earth, so you should watch Alien and its superior sequel, Aliens, before we do the show.

27:11Pilot TV Hosts:That's a perfectly good, very good sequel, but just obviously not as good as the original. You'll be lucky if I even watch the TV show, so let's not push it. That's fair. And that's what I've been watching. Very good. Yeah. Okay. I've got a question, Boydie. Do we have a guest this week? No, I don't think we do. We don't? No. You were going to do an interview for this week. It didn't happen. No, it's never happened. No, sorry. All right, good to know. Philly Ors. And Freddie Highmore. And Freddie Highmore, yeah. No, yeah. It just didn't happen. It hasn't come to fruition yet. Anyway, I mean, it could be one of those where it ends up being...

27:44People say we're shambolic, but I don't know if we are.

27:46Pilot TV Hosts:I don't think we are. Organised chaos. Yeah, I think people appreciate... I mean, I spoke to them at the launch. Oh, of course you did. Of course you did. Of course you did. But we haven't been given a slot for interviewing. I think people enjoy this kind of live administration. Is it yet another reason why people think, I'm not sure? Yeah, maybe. Anyway, come and see us on the live event. We'll be really organised. Yeah, so organised. The most organised we've ever been. All right, should we have a listener question instead? Yes, let's. And it's less of a question, more of a comment. And it's from Elliot.

28:14Look, don't... James gets worried that it's going to be a criticism. No, not that. It's just now the listener comment section, but carry on. Are you the postmistress? No. Okay, so this is from Elliot, who says, in your intro to the Mixtape review, James asked whether teenagers send each other Spotify playlists. Oh, yes, I did. Yes. So you got in touch today, Having been a teenager recently, he's 21. We have young listeners. Wow. He says, I can confirm I both made and received Spotify playlists as a teenager. It's not quite the same as a mixtape, is it? Thinking it was cool, I did actually make mixtapes as a teenager too, which was a challenge, but much more satisfying.

28:50The flaw was that there was only one of my other friends who had a cassette play. I was going to say, you give it to someone, they'll be like, what the fuck am I going to do with this? So I thought that was very sweet. Yeah, so, I mean.

28:59Pilot TV Hosts:Cassette plays have come back, haven't they? No, no. No, they have. There was a whole feature on it on something I listen to. Really? Yeah, on the radio. But here's the question I have for you. And I've never fully understood this. So obviously vinyl has had a resurgence. And I get that a little bit because vinyl, like the artifact of a record is just cool. It's just a cool object, an objet d 'art, if you will. And I will. And people say, people say, oh, it gives a better sound. They sound better. They're warmer. And I'll submit, I don't see that. They just have like little crackly bits. I don't love that myself.

29:30But I get that there's a thing. But tapes are just objectively shit and have always been shit. Because half the time, I don't know if you had this, like in the sort of 1890s, where... 1890s? In the 1890s, yes, when I was a young man. Like, especially with Wartmans, you couldn't always guarantee they would play at the speed they were designed to play at, where they'd only be playing a little bit too fast or a little bit too slow and the song would just sound weird. Was it a setting you had it on? I don't think so. I think it was just shitty Wartmans. But yeah, this is genuinely a thing that I used to...

29:59I used to love Walkmans. Yeah, and CDs, obviously. They're digital. Good. I had a Discman as well. Did you? Did you? Discmans were really uncool. That was very posh. Well, it was so clunky as well. I wasn't carrying it around because it was pretty lame, but I don't know. Oh, okay. I never had a Discman. But what I would say is I've got a little test for you because we've recently watched something where a Walkman was in the show. Mixtape. Mixtape, yeah. No, not that. And there wasn't a Walkman in there, actually. Yes, there was. No, there wasn't. Yes, there was. Oh, yeah, of course. He's listening to it all the time.

30:29Sorry, I forgot the dual timeline. I was like, when was Jim Sturgeon listening to Walkman?

30:35Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, now this is on the tip of my brain. Yeah. Yes, there was. Tip of your brain tongue. Come on. No, it's not this life, obviously. Nope. He's listening to Walkman on this life, by the way. Oh, okay. And one of the things I thought about this, I'm sorry to go back to that very quickly, and I meant to mention this when we talked about it on Pilot Plus, is what a difference it makes when there's no mobile phones. Yeah. Mobile phones. Well, it shifts the whole nature of the show, doesn't it? The whole thing is incredible. That entire show is predicated on the idea that he has no way of getting in touch with you.

31:01Pilot TV Hosts:There's one bit where he has to go to a phone box and, you know, use a phone box. And you're like, oh my God, it really makes a difference. Anyway. Well, Stranger Things, which I watched recently, that has a Walkman in it. Yeah. Yeah. We've just reviewed it, guys. Wait a minute. Oh, you know, you did your own rewatch. Yes. What was it we just reviewed? Okay. Not, um, no. It definitely wasn't a narrow road to the distant north or whatever it was called. Deep north. Okay, I'm going to give you a clue. Yeah. Copacabana. Copacabana. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's Danny Tyrus, Mr. Big Stuff. Mr. Big Stuff, yes.

31:32But he's sitting there in the street. He's there. He's a recycling vigilante, and he's just listening to his Walkman, which he's found in a bin. Do you know what? It shows how old I am, that I didn't even for one second bump on the fact that he was using a tape-based Walkman. I just accepted it. It never occurred to me, why are you using that archaic piece of technology? He found it in a bin. Yeah, but it didn't occur to me that that was somehow out of time.

31:52Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, I looked at it, and I thought, that's a funny little thing. It's a funny little observation, yeah, that he would if he'd been using like a zoom or something I'd have definitely bumped on that yeah god I remember that yeah so anyway that was our our young listener got in touch we're grateful for Elliot and he has confirmed that people like young kids are swapping Spotify playlists so that's quite wholesome I like that that still happens yeah although you know god help them if like the object of their desire is in the Apple ecosystem and doesn't use Spotify what do they do then? I mean don't go out with them like me that's it I will not date you.

32:27You're on Apple Music. I'm having to filter you out on the basis you don't have an Apple product. God, do you think it's like that? Oh, no, you're on Deezer. I don't know. God, this is an insight to me. I do judge. Oh, God, this is actually. Oh, no, I want to hear this now. This is a media wanker thing to say, but the difference between a PC and a Mac, I do sort of like bump against. You judge PC people harshly. Yeah, that's probably all our listeners. Sorry.

32:52Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, yeah, I do as well. but actually then you realise that I'm sure you would concur with this that isn't it like gamers think that PCs are better than Mac well I think also most people in most jobs I think generally use PCs unless they're in creative profession unless they're designers or journalists I think most people use PCs it's just a wank it's like an ego thing it's just certain industries it's not just no it's not about wanking it's specifically about having certain industries it's media media people use it you can get porn on PCs just as easily God I wouldn't know about that whatever your plans for the weekend are You couldn't yourself, thanks.

33:24That's how I watch Slow Horses. I don't know how to tell you. But look, look, look, look. Guys, guys, guys. Guys, guys. No, I know what you're saying, but then people like a certain person who Boydie holds in very, very high regard feels exactly the same way, but in reverse. She has absolute contempt for Max. Who's that? Sophie. Helen. Helen. Oh, I didn't know that. She's a dyed-in-the-wool PCer. She uses an Android phone. We'll have none of this happen. Really? Why? Does that affect your affections for Helen? No, no, it's all right. If it was anyone else.

33:57Pilot TV Hosts:I'm just really telling you about lots of things, including the Fantastic Four film. Anyway, another film bit. But that's weird. That's interesting. I remember back in the day, before Steve Jobs turned the company around, that's how long I've been into Apple products. I used to sell Apple products in the 90s. I worked in a computer store. I used to sell computer games and computers. That makes so much sense. Where was this store? In Guildford? No, it was not in Guildford. It was in Harrow Town Centre. In Harrow Town Centre, I worked in... There was a company called Silica and it was a concession within Debnams in Harrow.

34:36I bet you were good at that job. And I sold... I don't know who that was. I had a little ponytail.

34:41Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, I need to see a photo. Bring the photo. Okay, this is it. Like the nerdy guy in The Simpsons. What's his name, that character? Yeah, comic store guy. Yeah, with a hat. Okay, this is the extra bonus. If you come to the live event show, maybe we will show that photo. I don't have a photo of you. You must have a photo of you in a ponytail. Well, not from work, no. I've been obsessed with Apple products for so long. And I used to be... I remember when the iPod was created, it being the biggest moment of my life practically, because it was like, oh my God, this is... You know, I was first in the queue.

35:17Pilot TV Hosts:I timed a visit to New York for when the iPhone came out so I could get it pretty much on the opening day, which I think was marginally ahead of when they came out in the UK. And I used to, I was obsessed, I was absolutely obsessed with Apple product. Yeah. And I would go around like on Wednesday looking for Apple products you couldn't get in Britain when they were on sale already in America. So I could not be further from... Well, until Apple want to sponsor us, no more Apple chat now because we've spoken about them quite a lot, haven't we? So much of gorgeous. Okay, move us on again. Some people might be interested.

35:46Well, I'm just thinking. No, move us on. Come on. to TV and we've talked about Apple products and me and my prejudices.

35:54Pilot TV Hosts:Apple TV Plus is quite a big streaming service actually. Again, you could not imagine Apple would have been involved. This is a TV point. Yeah. Valid. My final point on Apple products is if you just said to me 20, 30 years ago, by the way, in the 2020s, Apple would be running the most acclaimed TV shows around. I'd be like, what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, it's true. It is extraordinary. And actually, it's my favourite platform. Although, to be fair, when they launched, you know, they came out the gate swinging, see their first big show, you know, they knew exactly what they were doing from the get-go.

36:28The morning show.

36:28Pilot TV Hosts:That's what I'm saying. They knew it was the morning show, which I still haven't got the screen just for. I check it pretty much every day. You haven't seen it, Boyd. Why would you say that out loud? You know what's coming from him. I know. Just don't give him the platform to do it. Do you know what? It's been so long since I've seen him, I almost forgot what happened. Sigh. Has anyone got any news? Oh, I thought that was the other question we dealt with. Yes. So we should move on to this week's news. And what news have we got? Well, so I'm surprised by this, but obviously delighted for Owen Wilson fans that his golf comedy stick has been renewed for a second series on...

37:03Apple TV Plus? Yeah, the aforementioned... The aforementioned.

37:06Pilot TV Hosts:Yeah. Pishmanunciations all over the place. Pishmanunciations. Pishmanunciations. I think that dates back to the two Ronits. Oh my God, listen. Speaking of sketch shows. Listen, I've just said we've got one young listener. Don't make the tune up. They just like heard the two Ronnies. The two Ronnies? That is one for the kids, that reference. Anyway, yes. By the way, can I just preempt any criticism? If there is a sketch show that I've forgotten about that is on TV at the moment, I apologise in advance. I'm sure there is something I've forgotten about. I was racking my brain and I Googled it. So yeah, there probably is a sketch show that's on.

37:37Pilot TV Hosts:Carry on. Okay. While we're doing an apology, sorry for any PC hatred, I just had. So yes, anyway, it's been renewed for a second season. Okay. Yeah. They're sticking with it. Yeah, indeed. Also, I don't know if this is of interest. Oh, actually, it'll be of interest to Boyd, particularly. Only Murders in the Building's got a date. It's the 9th of December. It's going to land on Disney+. What date did you say? 9th of September. I think I said December. I think you said December, which is my birthday. So that was a bit confusing. That would be quite the present, Boyd. Yeah, it would be. And both of us would chip in so you could fly to New York to watch it.

38:11Thank you.

38:12Pilot TV Hosts:Oh, wow. I mean... What a treat. When I say both of us, James. yeah sorry the 9th of September on Disney Plus and that will be the 5th season that is exciting and a huge the cast list is just incredible I don't know if you've got it to hand but anyway it's just yeah incredible array of brilliant guest stars half of which were in the previous season to be fair so they kind of retained the core but that is exciting I still love that show by the way and let's never forget the fact that we did it week by week and James James refused it was like an opt-out I just failed yeah I think it was just to give him time to have like an eye rest or something I just I can't I do like when he does that because I just add it to my list of things I'm allowed to do because he's done it I think he actually would have preferred the last season more than any other because it was much more immersed in the Hollywood it was more like Hollywood self-referential stuff yeah and it was better it was better yeah it was actually better yeah that one that we watched was series two three two two which one did we review I think it was three well whichever one it was I did struggle a lot with that I did as well it was a series of highs and lows, to be fair.

39:15Focusing on the lows. Any other news? Well, there's big news from Channel 4. What? They're going to be putting out a multi-part Taylor Swift documentary. It's very, very exciting. It doesn't have a title, apart from possibly just Taylor. It's a working title. Are you sure it's not about Sheridan? It could be about Taylor Sheridan. It doesn't look like it's about Taylor Sheridan. I would be less inclined to watch. Do you know what? I'm not even sure I would be less inclined to watch that. That would be fascinating. Taylor Sheridan's rise from, like, Deputy Hale on Sons of Anarchy to like dominating modern television.

39:43This is a self-debate in action. Would I watch it? Yes, I would. A mass self-debate. Mass self-debate, yeah. All right, go on. But yeah, that's pretty much all the information. They're making a multi-part to Hayley Swift documentary. But you know what, the biggest... Which we will review on this podcast.

39:58Pilot TV Hosts:Really? The biggest story of the week in television is, you know what that is, it's the ongoing scandal of CBS's cancellation of the late show Stephen Colbert. I mean, that is actually very true. This takes in Donald Trump, CBS, the merger that's supposed to be happening soon, CBS and that production company, whatever it's called, I've forgotten the name of. And it's shaking American culture to its foundations. The latest, David Letterman's issued, this is that news today, issued a 20-minute video in which he talks about how CBS, the BS, sounds of bullshit. And all these people are supporting Stephen Colbert.

40:37Pilot TV Hosts:All of his rival talk show hosts went on his show the other night to do a sketch. Oh, wow. He did a monologue on Monday's show after Trump said, I absolutely love that Colbert got fired. His talent was even less than his ratings. Classic Donald Trump. And he told him to go fuck himself. You see what Colbert told Trump. His ratings, we should point out, he was by far and away the market leader in the late night talk show arena. Yeah, so the whole content, the late show is the biggest of the late night chat shows by far. It's the biggest hit. Now, what's interesting is depending on who you talk to, does it or does it not make money?

41:09Pilot TV Hosts:So according to CBS, it loses the money. I think something like 40 million a year, they were saying. 40? 40, yeah. Which, I mean, sounds like a lot in the scheme of things. Believe it or not, in TV, American TV is a huge loss. But then other people say, well, no, no, no, it makes money because they clip it up on YouTube, et cetera, and, you know, show us the proof that it's actually losing money. I remember when James Corden gave up, decided to end The Late Late Show, which was the show on CBS, after the Stephen Colbert, the Stephen Colbert show used to lead into his chat show, that you'd be surprised, even though it seems like a fairly cheap type of genre of television, a chat show, what do you need?

41:52Pilot TV Hosts:You just need your host, guests who are promoting stuff anyway, so you're not like you have to pay them. And what you do have in the show, American Jones, is a massive staff. so on the late show James' show I think he had about 150 people working on it you got the writers everyone right everyone writers and with James' show you had all the production of carpool karaoke and all that exactly all of that yeah so I think that was probably more expensive than Stephen Colbert's show because Stephen Colbert has bits pre-film bits and stuff of course they all do but not as many as James had in his show but according to CBS this whole genre they're basically almost kind of saying this genre is dying before our eyes the late night chat show which for me it's really sad because I love that stuff you know I've read all the books about it me being on set that time when I visited James Gordon's I had access to all areas behind the scenes to see how the show was made it was like one of the greatest days of my life honestly so this whole thing is wild and what people are saying is that CBS is acquiescing to Donald Trump because Donald Trump sued them over an interview in I think it was 60 minutes if I get the details of this one again apologies because I'm just This is off the top of my head.

43:02Pilot TV Hosts:And he accused 16 minutes of re-editing an interview to make him look bad. And CBS gave in and agreed a deal to pay him off, I think, like$90 million. 16, thank you. Wait, so they were admitting they had? Yeah, well. Bearing in mind that they had initially said this was an entirely baseless lawsuit. Yeah. And let's say, like, baseless lawsuits seem to be quite common at the moment. And if you were, you know, you wouldn't necessarily need a tinfoil hat, but if you were a conspiracy-type theory, you might say that them settling this lawsuit for 16 million, which they had said was baseless, it's interesting timing given that their parent company, Paramount, is looking to merge with Skydance, and they need FCC approval for that.

43:49And so if Trump doesn't want that to happen, he could stop it happening. So one might argue that it just looks convenient that this is when it happened, and also convenient, the cancellation of the show. Because Stephen Colbert did, shall we say, call attention to that coincidence quite vocally on his show and Trump doesn't like him. So, look, I'm not saying that this is all a big conspiracy, but were you inclined to look for one, you wouldn't need to look very hard. Yeah, don't worry. We're not going to have any baseless lawsuits against us. James is panicking.

44:18Pilot TV Hosts:Is that more or less the cover it off, Woody? You've summed it up very well, yeah. So Colbert has... The most incredible thing is that on his own show, he was slagging off CBS which was a bold brilliant thing to do well John Oliver used to do that all the time and still does in fact to HBO oh yeah completely but so you know he did criticise his corporate you know he bit the hand if you like but the consequence is really depressing I think it's miserable that you know I mean he'll be fine he's brilliant but it does threaten to sound the death knell for it's the times we're living Boydo I know but it's just really sad and Colbert did point out that you know he said if it is all about the money how could it purely be a financial decision if the late show is number one in the ratings so you know he's fighting against it and everyone I think it's lovely that everyone's all his rivals are rallying around Jimmy Kimmel and etc but we'll see what happens you know I wouldn't be surprised if someone like Netflix a streamer because Netflix has dabbled in the talk show format and the talk show's genre then you know they could conceivably hire him to do a talk show for them something like that so you know he will have no difficulty finding work like the man's incredibly We don't need to have a whip round just yet.

45:28Also, I would like to see you do an interview with Stephen Colbert. And I would like you to bring up your opinion on Lord of the Rings to Stephen Colbert, who might be the biggest Lord of the Rings stan on earth. I know. I'll see what he says.

45:40Pilot TV Hosts:Yeah, okay. Challenge accepted. The other thing I think we should mention is the passing of Ozzy Osbourne. Yeah. Because Ozzy Osbourne, the Osbournes, was an absolute groundbreaking piece. Yeah, one of the parents of reality television, right? Yeah, 100%. Yeah, so you cannot overemphasize the contribution that the Osbourgs made to that genre of celebrity-based reality TV. It was an absolute groundbreaker and brilliant. And he was the ultimate kind of weird, patriarchal figure who would come up with the most bizarre things to say. And he was just such an extraordinary TV figure. And of course, Sheldon turned Sheldon into a superstar as well.

46:21Pilot TV Hosts:So yeah, from a TV point of view, that's a massive, massive thing. I remember we shot him at Heat a couple of times. We interviewed him. I interviewed him twice. I interviewed him in LA. Wow. And in the, I think it was the, one of the big hotels where they have bungalows. So the whole family was staying in this bungalow at this hotel in LA. And I was, by the way, there's a big pool. I'll never forget. And I was interviewing him. And he arrived and I was in mid-chat with him, Aussie. And he looked up and he goes, a rat, a rat, I've seen a rat. There's a rat. And I was like, really? Are you sure?

46:51Pilot TV Hosts:And I still think to this day there was no rat. No. you're a rat you dirty rat he thought he'd seen a rat but there was never ever any evidence that he had there was a rat in his kitchen what was he going to do amazing another youthful reference there from you before this song from 40 years ago I think it's safe to say that Elliot is now stopping he's going to fix that he's not listening anyway I've got loads of Ozzy Osbourne stories if you want them save it for the live event save it for the live show oh I can save it for what I like to you I'm going to make one up so I'll do You've already now ruined the game by telling us that you're going to make one up.

47:25Yeah, but I'll do like... Yeah, I could do one that I make up

47:29Pilot TV Hosts:and two that are real. And you can guess which one's which. Yeah, there you go. That's my plan. I've hatched my plan. Another incentive to buy tickets, guys. Clearly. Russell T. Davis, that's one thing. But me coming up with a fictional Aussie Osborne-based anecdote could be the real seller of tickets. I mean, I'd buy a ticket for that. Yeah, carry on. Should we end news there? Yes, please, let's do it. Because I'm getting increasingly hungry and it's not the sight of Kay's weird peanut butter thing that's causing it. I did want to mention Sacha Baron Cohen's body transformation. Oh my God. We know we have to talk about it.

47:59Pilot TV Hosts:So this is the cover of Men's Fitness. Sacha Baron Cohen who is absolutely shredded. It is of course an absolute coincidence that he recently got divorced. No, it's for the film, isn't it? Yeah, well apparently although I have watched all of Einhardt and at no point does he get his pecs out in that so he didn't need to be shredded to wear, you know, a coat. But yeah, apparently for Mephisto he has transformed himself and yes, he's looking ripped. Yeah. Absolutely. How old is he? He's looking pretty good. How old? He's like, what, early 50s? Oh my gosh, yeah. I'm guessing, I'm guessing. He's 53.

48:31He's 53. There you go, yeah. Yeah.

48:34Pilot TV Hosts:Who among us doesn't look like that when we take our t-shirts off? Yeah, exactly. But anyway, I'm glad I mentioned it, because it was extraordinary. Extraordinary sight. Check it out. Check it out indeed. Okay, let's move on to this week's reviews and first up this week, we have The Assassin on Prime Video and this is a six-part thriller from Harry and Jack Williams and this sees retired hitwoman Keely Hawes enjoying a visit from her son, played by Freddie Highmore. Only for her old life to catch up with her in the most inconvenient way. Boyd-E is horribly compromised, of course. Having not only interviewed everyone, but clearly not for us, but also been generally paid off by the production company.

49:12So we turn, of course, to the voice of integrity, Kay. Was this a hitman or a load of wet work? It is an absolute hit. I love this. This is so different from the last time we saw Keeley having a Greek island adventure in the Durrells. This is her being a badass assassin. So this starts off with a brilliant and utterly brutal fight sequence where Julie, so this is Keeley Horse's character, but it's the younger version because it's a flashback. She takes on myriad assailants and comes out on top and immediately establishes who this character is. But what I love about what the Williams brothers have done very, very well is that it's dealt with so quickly because it establishes, okay, she's this badass assassin and then instantly it shows that she's got this pregnancy test and then it flips forward to 31 years later or something and then this is the Keeley horse, you know, then she's retired, she's living in Greece and it's just so neatly and deftly dealt with that I think it's like kind of a lesson in storytelling.

50:12Then we pick up and she's in Greece and I just love her character. I think Keeley's having such a great time because she gets to do a bit of fighting, but also she's just playing this character who is, she's a mother, as you say, Freddie Highmore is her son, who they're estranged and he is a journalist. He's highly anxious. They're completely the, you know, opposites. And he comes to visit her and he's looking to bond and he's looking to find out more about his father. And she is just like, she is so reluctant to reveal anything about her. She's unmaternal. She's kind cold. She would rather fight someone.

50:51It's more scary dealing with her son and the emotions connected to motherhood than it is potentially losing a limb. And I love that. She plays it so well. So yeah, I just love Keely as that retired cantankerous character. They sum her up. They say that she's a perimenopausal James Bond and I think that's the best description of her. I just am obsessed with it like I've had to not watch the next one though because I want to sort of savour it

51:22Pilot TV Hosts:oh I mean you need to watch the next one I know but it will just go too quickly I just but I love the characters and I think the dynamic between Freddie and Keighley is great because something happens which I mean I'm not going to ruin it but this whole thing is that they are they have to go on the run and it's about their dynamic and their relationship and I think the genius thing about this is that they've made the central character, this middle-aged, sort of cantankerous woman assassin. It's refreshing and she is loving it. If you remember, she pointed out, when I did speak to her at the launch...

51:57Pilot TV Hosts:But not for us. Not for the podcast. She pointed out that she played Lindsay Denton in Line of Duty, if you remember. Who was a kind of surprisingly furious slash violent, you know, outburst of some violence. She was also famously in Spooks. Yeah, famously in Spooks. But no, but I mean more in terms of her capacity for a sudden bout of violence. Yes. Lindsay Denton was... She was a great character. Was she the only, quote-unquote, villain who came out for a second series? Yeah, yeah. She was in two series, yeah. She was a nasty bastard. She was a nasty bastard. But she had quite a tragic arc as well.

52:32Pilot TV Hosts:Totally, yeah, totally. Nuance nasty bastards. Yeah. Absolutely phenomenal. I love that character. The bit when she's in prison. Yeah, 100%. And do you remember what she did to the neighbour who caused her to make too much noise? Do you remember that? Anyway. Anyway, she was an absolutely brilliant character who was, you know, kind of fully capable of dealing with any men in any way she saw fit, even if she wasn't a trained assassin like this character. But this character is absolutely brilliant, as you say. But I love the Williams brothers. I mean, they are absolutely phenomenal. From, you know, from The Missing, which they did two series of, Baptiste the spin-off.

53:08Pilot TV Hosts:Boat Story. Boat Story, which James hosted the screening of. I did. Exactly. and I hosted the in-person screening of... Okay, it's not a competition. It's a rival competition. It's always a competition, you know that. You're ridiculous. We've both taken William's Bucks. Exactly. Remember, now, Boat Race had... They love a bloodbath because Boat Race had the... Do you remember the scene in the police station? Oh, my God, yeah. The massacre in the woods. That's really upsetting. Right, it's extraordinary. And now in this, so you get the opening, as you alluded to, a sequence, which is when, as you say, in the flashback sequence, which you don't really know what's going on and you don't know it until she takes off her mask whoever she's wearing because she's masked.

53:43Pilot TV Hosts:So part of our point of it is you're assuming it's a man, aren't you? It's a kind of obvious ruthless killer for hire. This isn't a spoiler, but this is literally the first scene. Then a thing happens 20 minutes later in this opening episode, in the opening episode, which is even more violent and is an astonishing sequence, which is so brilliantly done. I have to credit... It's very well choreographed, isn't it? It's brilliantly choreographed. and Lisa Marquette directed it she directed the first half of the series absolutely brilliant job she's done because it's so cinematic and that sequence is phenomenal and you'll know it when you see it then there's the connection between as you say the relationship between mother and son is brilliantly handled and he's like permanently bewildered but Freddie Highmore and he's so anxious he's looking for her for reassurance that she can't give no and then he's like thrust into the middle of her mad world and has to like clamber aboard the motorbike so she can escape the sniper assassins.

54:46Pilot TV Hosts:Everyone's after her. Everyone's trying to kill her for various reasons. And I love, he's so funny in it. He's like, this is, I think this is one of the most comedic things they've done. I mean, back in the day when they first started the Williams Brothers, they did work on comedies. I mean, that was kind of what they did. There's a lot of comedy in all this stuff though. There is, you're right. They always have a sense, but I think this is almost more comedic. I don't know. Like, like, Boat Story had such a thread of absurdity. Like the killer who decided he wanted to be a potter and sort of chucks it all in to like glaze pottery.

55:16Pilot TV Hosts:That's true. But I think the relationship between Freddie Highmore and Killian Austin is it's like a double act. It's like a comedy double act. The banter comes thick and fast. The banter is brilliantly handled. But then you've got how these other siblings, Kayla and Ezra, played by Shalom Bruna Franklin, who was in The Tourist. And he's going to be in The Girlfriend, which is coming up. Indeed, The Girlfriend, which you know all about, Kay. And her brother, played by Devon Terrell, who's a total fucking knobhead. And brilliantly so. He's excellent, by the way, in that role. He struts around with his shirt off.

55:46Yeah, we see him on a... He's a boat wanker.

55:47Pilot TV Hosts:He's a yacht wanker. Yeah, yacht. Total yacht wanker, yeah. They are fantastic. And this whole series is almost about different interrelationships with different couples, if you like. And without spoiling it, the connections between them are made clear eventually. But it's so... Those interrelations are so brilliantly handled by the Williams brothers that all of the main characters in the show, and even all the supporting ones who get to me, there's a guy who ends up in prison and you don't really know how he's connected to the storyline. I feel very sorry for him. He is. But those scenes are, again, funny but dark.

56:21Pilot TV Hosts:Really dark but really funny at the same time. They handle, I think they are the best. Tonal shifts. At handling tonal shifts and at jumping, incorporating huge violence and then jokes and brilliant snappy dialogue and all of that. They are the best at it. I think they're absolutely unparalleled. and I think this is one of the best things they've ever done. It's so entertaining. It's so fun. And they don't give a shit. It's like they seem to have complete freedom about it. You know, they all have her calling people C-words, you know. Oh, that's so satisfying, isn't it? Yeah, but Keely Hawes, she's having the time of her life and she literally said yes.

56:56Pilot TV Hosts:I mean, you know, she's doing stunt work, she's riding motorbikes, she's shooting people, This is such a great get for Prime Video, don't you think? It's brilliant. The whole thing is, this is exactly what they should be doing. Yeah. You know, and so I love this. this is one of my favourite shows of the year, without a doubt, I've seen the first four or six, and every single episode is just fantastically entertaining. I can't wait till it's ready. It's really good. I, as you know, struggle with tonal shifts sometimes, and I remember the Taurus. We all know that. I like it. He says these things as if we don't know.

57:23I might get my T-shirt back on. Yeah, your tonal shifts T-shirt. Look, the Taurus, I didn't quite, and I think it was the tonal stuff that got me, but Boat Story was a really good way into William's stuff for me, because it dialed up the humour and the absurdity, I think, more than a lot of their stuff. It leaned more heavily into that. And actually, you start to really get it. It goes from really dark and super violent to utterly ridiculous and genuinely, you know, hysterical, like Daisy Hacker doing a comedy Russian accent. Wait, sorry. So why did that appeal to you when you hate Tony Schultz?

57:53Well, because I think in The Tourist, certainly the episodes I watched, I didn't watch it all, there's quite a subtle distinction between it. So it's not quite one thing. It's not quite the other thing. and it wasn't super funny, but it didn't take itself too seriously and I couldn't quite pin it down. I think Boat Story, it was very clear on both of them. Like, the drama really lands, but the comedy is genuinely very funny and clearly deliberately absurd. And I think just the way it's structured, and they had this sort of like comedy narrator, you know, as well. All of these, and the title cards, everything about it was so heavily stylized that I really got what they were going for.

58:27I really understood it. You need a purposeful tone shift. Yeah, I need to be spoon-fed. I need to be really fucking obvious so that I understand. is what I'm saying. No, fair enough. You need to know it's intentional. This is subtle again, but actually I think it works really well. I think the humour is very... Do you think it's subtle? I do think it's subtle. Oh, it's more subtle than the previous one. Yeah, I do think it's subtle. I think Boat Story, and this is not a criticism, I don't think it was subtle because I don't think it was trying to be subtle. It was very obvious in what it was. I think this one is a very fine thread of humour.

58:53It's definitely funny. It's definitely absurd, but it's not a comedy. It just has a very nice, sort of sharp sense of humour to it. Yes, comedy and dark moments. Yeah, but the thriller at the heart of it is compelling in and of itself. You know, you really want to know what's going on. There's an AI thread in the first episode, which is, I thought, quite interesting and topical, but not in a kind of clumsy way. I thought it was quite a subtle use of that, which was good. She's great, he's great. It's fabulous. Really like it. We all agree. We all agree. And that never happens.

59:22Pilot TV Hosts:And Gina Gershon pops up in a fascinating role. Jack Davenport, this life, topically enough. I'm just giving you Richard Dormer, etc. Yes, the cast is fantastic. The Assassin then, Prime Video? Well, it started on Friday because we followed the review embargo. We didn't break the review embargo, unlike other publications I might mention. Do we get brownie points? I want Prime Video. I was going to email, I have yet to do it, I was going to email them saying, I see a certain newspaper break the embargo. We've stuck to it many years. You can't, look, I know Ozzy Osbourne saw a rat, but you can't be the rat.

1:00:01Very good.

1:00:02Pilot TV Hosts:Call back. I don't mind being the writer, by the way. Really? Oh, no. Snitches. I haven't done it yet. You know what happens to snitches. Anyway, carry on. Next up. So it's already on, basically. It's already on video. Shall we move on to The Count of Monte Cristo? Let's. Please, God. Let's do it. Right, so this is on you and drama. It is the latest adaptation of the Alexandre Dumas classic tale. Very good. Well, I thought, you know, if I said Alexandre Dumas, you'd just come at me again. Anyway, this is the classic tale of false imprisonment, hidden treasure, and long-simmering revenge. here starring Sam Claflin as Dante's the man to whom it all happens now Boydie the question on everybody's lips is was Sam Claflin peak Dante's or a colossal count?

1:00:43good one James very good

1:00:45Pilot TV Hosts:one of the old very good responses he's happy as well he's very smart but rightfully so this time this is what I would call a euro pudding it's a co-production It's a French-Italian-British co-production of various people filmed in various parts of Europe as well with a kind of international cast telling a story, you know, of a kind of, in a period drama, a very traditional period drama way. There's nothing groundbreaking or particularly bold or daring about this show, but it's solid. You know, I think it's a solid, oh, you're looking at me like I've got it completely wrong, Kate. listeners, just in case you're not watching on YouTube.

1:01:32Yeah, please don't watch YouTube. You disagree. No, no, no, I agree with what you're saying, but I think it's a classic story. I don't think it needs to be groundbreaking. I think it, you know.

1:01:39Pilot TV Hosts:Well, no, my point is it's obviously literally a story, well, I can't remember when the book came out in 1844 or whatever. Yeah. What I'm saying is... Boyd had the first edition. True story. Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, totally. I thought you meant, oh, right, sorry. When you're adapting a classic old text like this, there's various ways of going about it. You can either go down the traditional route and you're just telling the story in old school. That's what I'm saying. This is an old school. Yeah, it's quite a sort of, it's faithful. It's a faithful adaptation. Whereas certainly like the cinematic ones, they've condensed stuff and tweaked stuff.

1:02:09Sometimes they modernize things.

1:02:10Pilot TV Hosts:But this is just the facts, man. Yeah. And basically, Sam Claflin's character, Edmund Dantes, is accused of treason. Basically, he's got two guys who don't like him, who kind of get together and frame him for something that he hasn't done. He's come back from, and voyages overseas, various places, come back to see his fiancée. And as soon as he sees her, he's kind of snatched away, shoved in this horrendous prison, and left to kind of fend for himself, while at least some people try and fight for his rights and fight for the fact that he's been wrongly accused. So it's kind of, you know, I enjoyed it as it went on.

1:02:48Pilot TV Hosts:Sam Claflin's pretty good in it. He's an exec producer as well. This is clearly like a, you know, an attempt to do a Sam Claflin project, as far as it's concerned, you know, playing the lead role. and, you know, doing a perfectly good job. Jeremy Irons pops up later in the series. He's not in the first episode. And I enjoyed it, but the reason I referred to it as the Euro pudding is it's kind of, I don't think there's anything vital about it. And, you know, it's not exactly must-see TV. It's fine, is how I would describe it. And they've done a decent job. It's relatively lavish, quite cinematic.

1:03:23Pilot TV Hosts:It's directed by Bill August, who is, you know, Bill August? or Chachana? Billy August. Who won Oscars for Pell the Conqueror and he's a kind of, you know, veteran. He's in his 70s now, I think. Veteran film director, highly respected film director. But even then, I wouldn't say exactly he brings a lot of directorial flair to the whole thing. It's solid, but I'm not going to carry on watching it in any way whatsoever. That's not going to happen. Again, you're looking quizzical. You disagree. Bring it on, Kate. I completely disagree. You're not hosting a Q &A, for the sake. No. How dare you? No, I agree with the fact that it is a faithful adaptation.

1:04:04It's traditional and it's storytelling. All those things, I do agree. But I loved it. I thought it was a really strong first opening episode. I think it's beautifully shot. I think Claflin's well cast in that role. I'm not familiar with the story. I know the themes of it, of injustice and retribution. I thought you'd like the latter part. yeah watch your back James yeah because I had the book and I've never read it so I was invested anyway but I just do you know what it really reminds me and I like a literary adaptation as my rewatch of Pride and Prejudice shows is that it reminds me of like BBC went through a phase of adapting Dickens and they had the Bleak House ones and you know all those kind of adaptations that I loved it used to be Sunday night and this feels to me a real sort of like almost BBC Sunday night adaptation that I mean weirdly it's on Saturday I don't know but maybe Saturday it's a new Sunday no one's told me and it's on it's a whole different world

1:05:03Pilot TV Hosts:on you and drama isn't it I think it should be a Sunday show though but anyway and it feels like an autumn show I've really enjoyed it and I can't wait to watch more you pinpointed exactly what I'm talking about because the Pride and Prejudice adaptation famously by who is that writer Andrew Davis Andrew Davis thank you who took a very bold approach to all of his adaptations often involving throwing in more sex action than you would normally expect from a period drama. He became famous almost for having romps in the middle of scenes of intimacy in the middle of his literary adaptations. And there are other writers.

1:05:38Pilot TV Hosts:It's like when Sarah Phelps does an Agatha Christie adaptation, she takes an incredibly bold, ventive, unexpected approach to telling those classic stories. But not all writers have to do that. No, no, no, I'm not saying they have to. I'm just saying they don't in this. And my preference would be for something slightly more challenging, daring, and bold, use the B word, as I often do, than this, which is a straight, that's my point. This is very straightforward, perfectly decent telling. For my own personal taste, I'd rather see something slightly more out there and slightly more challenging and, as I say, daring.

1:06:11Pilot TV Hosts:That's just my personal preference. Fair enough, yeah. But you've pinpointed exactly what I was trying to say better than I actually said it when I started this review. Well, I wholeheartedly enjoyed it. What about you? I'm probably more team Boydie. I can't really find a great deal of fault with it. It's a really clear, well-constructed adaptation of the book. But it didn't really hook me. I mean, unfortunately, I know how the book goes, but it didn't really sweep me up in it. It definitely got me in the way that, because it's kind of this wrongful imprisonment thing, you feel furious about the whole thing, and you want to see him get his revenge.

1:06:45So it does grab you emotionally. But I guess knowing how the story plays out, and I don't think there was, as you said, Boyd, I don't think there was anything hugely new in the framing of this story, in the way it was presented, in the way it was, you know, constructed, put together, shot. All of it just felt very, yeah, this is solid. I have no notes, no notes at all. But it didn't have any vim. It didn't have any kind of like je ne sais quoi. There was no sort of flair or panache to it. It was just very solid, very, not like workman. I don't mean like journeyman directing or anything. I just meant it was exactly what it needed, no more, no less.

1:07:20And I just feel like if you're going to breathe a new life into a classic story that has been told, let's be honest, many, many times before, I always think maybe you should do something different with it. Why? How many TV adaptations of this have there been? That's a good question. I don't know. There have been film adaptations, there have been TV adaptations. I couldn't tell you how many. I certainly haven't seen them all. You're not? No. You're not a Cary Monte Cristo collector. A Cristo completionist. No, I'm not. But I was waiting for the extra something. and maybe that comes on but I wanted something a little bit more you know exciting to happen I just you know a little bit of fair enough difference of opinion I was satisfied but if you if you two counts weren't then that's fine yeah don't deny that gave Kay a massive bone apart oh god James what Napoleon is like the linchpin of the entire story James I'd like to say that's beneath you but as we both know it's not oh god anyway please come and see us live anyway that is The Count of Monte Cristo which airs on you in drama when Boydie Saturday the 2nd of August

1:08:24Pilot TV Hosts:2025 at 9 o 'clock and it'll all be available to stream on the You streaming service all in one go all in one go do you know what I think that's a good shout because I do think like if it was all available in one go and I'd finish the first episode I quite possibly would just go into the second one to see whereas if it was week by week I don't think I'd come back to it but actually if it drops in one go maybe people should watch the first couple I would say because it is I mean it is a classic story and as Kay said he's very well called from it so and I want to see him get his wrench yeah that would be satisfying anyway and Jeremy Irons have you seen any Jeremy Irons bit of it yeah oh Jeremy Irons isn't it right in that case yeah five stars yeah okay we have to move on because we're running out of time but finally this week we have the returning series Jamboree whereby behind door number one the second series of returning Kiwi Irish crime drama The Gone and behind door number two we have Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches about for its second season.

1:09:18Oh God, where to even begin? I'll very, very briefly touch on the Mayfair witches, which is based on the Anne Rice books, which are The Witching Hour, Lasher and Taltos. That's the trilogy. I have read them. Even having read them, I had no fucking clue what was going on when I started this. So I didn't finish season one and I've just jumped into season two. And I should qualify this by saying that isn't the best way to see this at all. Because not only is it very complex in its plotting, but it's also completely crackers. So there's a demon in it called Lasher and at this point he's in the body of a small child and it's all a bit mad.

1:09:51But there's a lot more going in to this season. There's a lot more happening. The plot is a lot thicker, it's a lot more dense. Which equally means if you are not up to speed and you did read the books many, many years ago, you will be completely lost. But I think a lot of people gave up on the first season because the storytelling wasn't that coherent. I'm not sure they have resolved that particular issue with season two. It is still a little bit hard to follow what's going on. but and I cannot emphasize this enough I'm coming into this a little bit without knowing what's happening so I'm still undecided I'm sort of the same about The Gone actually yeah because I didn't see the first series it passed me by but I know it was very popular on BBC4 wasn't it

1:10:32Pilot TV Hosts:so they say it's a good drama but when you go into I mean it's a stupid thing to say when you go into series 2 it is picking up from the previous story that's the thing it's not standalone I have to be honest I was expecting this to be more of an entirely different story with two characters from the first season, which are the Irish detective Theo, played by Richard Flyer, teaming up with a New Zealand cop Diana, played by Akushla Tawakup. And I thought, well, the first series was, because I read about it, I remember when it was on, is about these two investigating a case. The second series is just going to be another case.

1:11:04Pilot TV Hosts:But actually, a lot of the story of the first season carries on over into the second season. I'd say the majority, yeah. Right? And there's a new mystery because there's a journalist character who's in the first story reporting on the mystery and this time she's the one who disappears. So that's the new case, if you like. But even then, she's heavily connected to events in the first story. So it is a bit bewildering. There's a recap at the beginning, which, so you could, you know, I would not advise people to dive into the second series. I would say, watch the first series on iPlayer if you think this is interesting enough and then watch the second.

1:11:35Pilot TV Hosts:But I have to say, even then, I would still judge it and I don't think it's amazing. I don't think it's brilliant. I think it is, it's a fairly, I would say it's fairly routine for me. It's like, you know, the whole idea of a mismatched cop, you know, one from one culture and one from another is fairly, that happens a lot. It's happened a lot recently. It's not particularly original. None of this feels original. The best thing about it is the depiction of the Maori characters who are interesting. There's a kind of couple who bring up another character and they're really, they're kind of fascinating.

1:12:05Pilot TV Hosts:They're the most believable part of the whole thing. I think the Irish guy is a bit one-dimensional and and it's not I don't think it's anything special I have to say for me this from what and I know it might sound unfair to judge it having not watched season one but I am doing that anyway and I am judging it and it feels like not the must-see crime drama of the moment shall we say if you want a brilliant New Zealand set crime drama Top of the Lake both series were phenomenal with Elizabeth Moss they are too I think you've made up for it by doing that thanks but yeah I did you know I don't like There are more New Zealand-based shows, I'm sure, but that is the absolute...

1:12:42Pilot TV Hosts:Top of Boyde's list. That is top of the list of Top of the Lake. Thank you. Thank you, Boyde. Thank you. I know you're trying to wind us up because we're running over. They're gone then. BBC Two. It's on Thursday, Thursday, July 2025, 9pm, and all on the iPlayer from that day. Mayfair, which is BBC One, Season 2, which is on Monday. Monday the 28th. And that aired in the States, I believe, at the beginning of this year. So many people already have seen it. What else did we miss this week, Boyde? Heavy Embargo Chief of War on Apple TV Plus on Friday that's the Jason Momoa project about the kind of establishment of Hawaii as a unified state when it's like four separate islands it's like a historical drama and we will cover that on Pilot Plus yeah apart from that I'm going to allow Twisted Metal is back for a second season on Paramount Plus which is the incredible thing with Anthony Mackie who's a huge star and he's in this really freaky Paramount Plus kind of post-apocalyptic bullshit show that's on Friday Fire Country is back on Sky and Witness on Wednesday that is the not to be confused with Smoke this is about firefighters and it's a kind of mainstream firefighting American primetime show and then of course Mrs.

1:13:52Brown's Boys

1:13:52Pilot TV Hosts:is back this week Mrs. Brown's Boys is back for four new episodes on Friday on BBC One because it's been just Christmas specials and New Year's for years and years and years if you're a big fan as I know you are then that is that's a big one that's Cambridge much Destination X on Wednesday and Thursday with Rob Brydon. It's exciting.

1:14:13Pilot TV Hosts:That's it. Excellent. What's up pick of the week? Oh, The Assassin. I mean, The Assassin. The Assassin. We have a consensus. Brilliant. Thank you very much. We need to leave the studio now. So I'm going to say please leave us a five-star rating. That's Kay, that's Boyd. They're both on social media. I'm sure you can find them. We'll be back next week. We'll be covering other shows. What's on? Platonic comes back for a second season. Wednesday's back for a second season. Eyes of Wakanda is on Disney +, Outlander Blood of My Blood, which is a spin-off to Outlander, and then there's Ridley on ITV1 with Adrian Dunbar, who will also be on the podcast, which is very exciting, but crucially, so will Paul Wesley, who plays Captain James T.

1:14:47Kirk in Star Trek Strange New World. And I had a chat with him. You'll be surprised to hear. And he'll be on the podcast as well. And then we just have one more show, one more show before the live show, which is very exciting. Oh, God. Oh, God, indeed. See you there. Pilot out.

1:15:08The Computer Po magazine are once applied to I Cream and blank McSulture animals.