Spurs Are Falling Apart, The Top 10 Current PL Captains & Our Arsenal v Chelsea Combined XI ALL TIME Draft

28:40Yeah. Rourdon's injured, but Manny Juif's now... Yeah, of course. So, whipping in crosses. By the way, Brentford have their next five games at 3pm. so that's at least 15 goals for Thiago yeah but Brentford's best player at the minute other than Sangari has been Lewis Potter and they're bringing him to so they're not going to do with him unless they put him back up out wide they'll put him up wide again yeah he's been so good Lewis Potter Dango Sharder that's what I mean how big of a loss is Rodon he's out for a while now apparently well Elvedi's come straight in so I mean it's a good job they got that across the line yeah because otherwise they would be cooked but I feel Leeds probably need one more player in this window today yes What?

29:21Right now. Because Nanto's gone as well, isn't he? Yeah, well, the Leeds fans were sitting. They were a bit worried about the... Also, if DCL... If DCL... Genuinely, I don't want to keep banging on, but if DCL gets injured, they are in quite big trouble. Who is the backup striker? Yeah. Yeah, Tom, who is their backup striker? Who comes in for DCL? They don't have one. You said Okafor would start up front, didn't you? He's gone, hasn't he? No, he played. He played. He's a left... Okafor would go. No, he's the second striker. That's why I pointed it out. Didn't you have a bet with Reeve that he'd start over, get more goals.

29:47No, he didn't have a bet. He just called me up for saying. I read somewhere of I've gone mad here. He got taken off on the 68th. No, no, no. I read this morning he'd gone. They cannot get rid of him. That's what I thought. Yeah, that's ridiculous. That is so ridiculous. Okafor, transfer news. Oh, he got done by fake news. I think I might have been. Not fake news. I don't know if they'll be... They are signing a defender. Yeah, they're definitely in for a centre-half today. Or Nice. That's nice. He's pretty nice, man. Sorry, they have... What's his name? Steps at the back. Bard. Bard? Oh, he's really good at it.

30:20Can you see if I've got done by AI with Ockermore? AI.

30:26Ockermore didn't play well, though. No, he didn't. Nemeche was good when he came on, but... I don't see anything about Ockermore. Oh, no. Sunderland beat Fulham 1-0. Fulham might be in bother, you know. They are in bother? It's just like... Everyone thought they'd be flirting around that. George Bard is like thingy coming out and already throwing all the players under the bus a little bit. Yeah, that is just like two games in. You've just got there. The boss of the problem is to think you're a bit of a knob anyways. He wants to pay out to just stay in West London and live in the... It's just...

30:58Problem is, you're coming to... He's a new manager coming into not a settled team. Yeah. Pretty ageing team. Lost players. Also just like a light team as well. Yeah, and... Very small squad. I'm not convinced about him as a man. Not a good recipe. I don't think this was the time for Fulham to take a risk with a manager. You needed someone guaranteed and solid. It's a weird risk as well. It's not like he has a big background behind him. He's a sexy name. That's what I mean. I feel like whenever you do that, you may as well, you're going to fail. It's like when Villas-Boas is right now. I think that's a bit different.

31:34Villas-Boas is a bit different. Yeah, it was. What did he have behind him? Villas-Boas. No, Villas-Boas at least did well in Porto. Like, Abloas, like, what is he? It's just a name from Villas-Boas. and he's failed at Real Madrid and like you had genuinely you have nothing to go off by the way if you fail at Real Madrid with that calibre of player and you think yeah he can do a job with us at Fulham it's like what is going on behind that thought process Real Madrid's a tough job it's a bit harsh yeah but you come from a manager like Marco Silva who's like a really genuine like proper manager who's underrated if anything I think Fulham saw it as a risk reward opportunity and if it kicked on they probably thought they could have broken into the top 10 in the Premier League but obviously the managerial appointment doesn't seem as good as it did in their head.

32:18I think it was done to try and attract players. Yeah, of course. It has done as well, hasn't it? Yeah, but I'm not convinced. Yeah, Garcia looks okay though, I think. Yeah, that was a good goal. Isidore also should have bagged the second or first before his first. Robbie's been quiet, hasn't he, the first season? But he might just be like They've just sold the jokers. Yeah. Come on. He is. Oh, we're not having this again. Kit, It came in the week where they got the Europa League draw. Big tie in Milan. How do we see them doing in that? What, have they got? Probably beating Milan as shit. Full of AC Milan.

32:54Milan aren't Milan anymore, mate. They're crap. Aren't they just signing all the English? They're crap. Well, someone's just signed Thingy from Spurs. Danso, was it? And then they've let the winger go, who was shit. Well, they just beat Venice 2-0. Venezia. What, newly promoted Venezia? Yeah. Luka Modric, Loftus-Cheek. Gonzalo Ramos they are crap they actually are they are actual shit mate what's happened to them there's a reason they're in the Europa League in Serie A their bench it's actually rubbish it's the pinion place for AC Malek Italian football is what the fuck's like they signed him what do you mean they just kind of they just kind of bored anyone can't they Rafael's gone they've just broken their transfer record on Gonzalo Ramos haven't they I saw it how much did he cost like 70 odd million bloody hell I can't remember his name but I saw a stat where it was like the last player in Serie A to have played in a World Cup for Italy is not in the league anymore so Serie A doesn't have a single Italian player who's played in a World Cup Jesus but not they'd never qualify I've done it since 2014 how does Italy that's another question there isn't it how Italy fixed their league well I just need more money don't they what I thought that was a was that an innuendo or a double entendre how will they fix their league because they're fucking match-fixers aren't they you match fixing bastards that's what I was meant Bournemouth left it no sorry not Bournemouth Everton Everton left it like didn't they good finish from Tokovsky that yeah they were unlucky in the first half though they should have yeah Petrovic was phenomenal for Bournemouth I thought who had the header first half Branfway yeah I thought Petrovic was like unbelievable he was so good in that he's been good since he's gone into there that's another one Chelsea should have fucking kept yeah Yeah, packed official's brilliant.

34:42All the problems were actually at home. I mean, the solution's there. They got Jackie Grealish gone back. I don't think that's confirmed. I think it's happening. It's happened. I can't believe how old he is. It might be to do with the indoor. Is he actually 31? He's 30, isn't he? 30. How is he 30? How is he 30? The process of ageing, mate. How old did you think he was? I just felt like he was younger. Arsenal. He's been around for like... Breaking news. Ah, but he's like Sterling though. Malik Fafana's having a medical at Arsenal. oh the winger I didn't know who that is Derek Manu from Lyon he's going Chelsea from Lyon medical Kainé from World Cup from Roma wowie that's who you beat Sunderland he's going to be the Enzo replacement I know beat Sunderland I don't know what that headline said a little bit quite a busy couple of days in the transfer window at Everton they are look like they're losing Ndi and Becker but they're getting in Balogun and Greeley yeah Balogun Dundale apparently but is Ndi not signed yet I thought he signed yeah so confirmed it's been a Greed I don't know if it's been a oh right I mean Greelich I think he liked it there didn't he I think it's good for him to go back there and I think Balogun's an upgrade on Beto absolutely and Dye's a big loss yeah yeah well it's funny we were talking the other week about like what he's never would he never get that like big six million sort of thing and you I'm surprised yeah I was going to say you were up the opinion that like he won't start for them though yeah but do you not think 65 million in this current market for a Premier League proven forward no 65 but a Premier League proven forward that's actually quite a bargain £25 yeah it's like free I mean I still think it's it's the market's absolutely ridiculous it's all cooked there's nothing even talking about price tags yeah it probably is fair I don't know it doesn't matter to City seems a lot to me but I don't know Barry's shit yeah well told you mate told you Barry's shit you told me I told you i was team beto mate you kept telling me he'll come good he's better than beto no he's not that was gone bye bye beto no but they signed them back just with the new name they're all chanting for armstrong to stay as well why all their strikers begin with b yeah i mean he was good in the first game yeah they struggled a bit uh on the weekend but do you see moise's uh interview though no he was basically asked about like the transfer window and all this and that Everton fans are angry and he sort of said like well he answered it as I'm an Evertonian as basically saying he's pissed off with the board that he's not getting the transfer sort of budget yeah he's already stressed that he wanted more he wasn't happy that Armstrong not happy obviously the fans turned around that what do we think of that fans fan power changed the mind of a club and a board have they changed their mind yeah I was going to say it would have been a weird one anyway I know technically it's pure profit and stuff but you've got a 19 year old lad from the academy he's obviously a good player it screams like an Elliot Anderson the incentive shouldn't be to sell it should be to push that guy forward I might be wrong but I don't believe they have issues with FFP do they they haven't went crazy in the market I think they've learned a lesson after the deduction that's all separate incomes so if they don't have to do it why would you sell your youngster?

38:01you don't no Bournemouth look alright don't they again Bournemouth's best bit of business this window is probably keeping Alex Scott isn't it who does he look like he looks like no the cop no do you know who he looks like when he has his hat on Shawn Michaels just a sexy boy no new like new Shawn Michaels who's now old like that's who he looks like new old Shawn Michaels current Shawn Michaels like 10 years ago Shawn Michaels long hair switch to music his face though so imagine Shawn Michaels with a haircut? No, when he wears a hat. Oh, hat Sean Michaels covering his hair off his hat. Get him on.

38:37Sean Michaels with ponytail hidden in his hat. Yeah. We can't even see it. Our screen's not at work. Hartle beat Coventry. Liam Miller should have scored two as well. This is massive. He probably should have squared it when he missed it, didn't he? The thing is, that's just... Look, if you just do that, his face, he looks like Sean Michaels. Yeah. Yeah. We said Mark Bonner. I don't know who that is. That already is like a... This is huge. That's an early six-pointer straight away at Coventry. Two out of two. That is brutal. Six points already. I haven't considered a goal. It's not even that. It's the impact of that on Coventry.

39:15That is... We said last week winning or drawing or losing at Arsenal isn't going to define who's staying up. That is... Yeah. You can't be losing that at home. That is fucking brutal. Deservedly so. I think... Yeah. Hull had the bigger chances. Coventry obviously had the ball, but Hull seemed to just soak him up. Miller should have probably squared it when he had that opportunity, didn't he? Do you know what the thing is? He was lively, man. I think when a team comes up, you saw it with something. It's like momentum at the start of the season. It's just absolutely everything. So Hull continue.

39:47Yeah, they're going to build on this momentum. They're going to be playing with so much confidence. You see, Hull is... It's exactly the opposite of Spurs, though, isn't it? Yeah, it's the opposite of Coventry. So Coventry's going to play with... Coventry's down in the dumps now. They've just lost one of the biggest games in their season there, which has to be a win. Every game has more pressure to get points on the board. I think that's what makes teams survive or not. But I mean, you look at Hull, next game they've got is home to Villa. They'll be biting their lip at that. They'll be growling.

40:18Biting their lip? Well, sexually. Yeah, all of them are going to be going... Grr. They'll be starting to growl at Villa. What's going on, Ray? I don't know why I said that. starting to growl at Villa biting his lip the tigers are biting their lip at the villains they're starting to growl why are you looking at me like that I look skinny again that's really worrying for Cov I can't lie but they could get 9 points out of 9 if they beat Villa that's exactly what they could get yeah wow but I fancy Hull to beat Villa at home right now I'm going early Coventry's getting relegated they're as good as gone now the momentum's shot they're gone after 2 games they're as good as gone now honestly There you go, Cobb.

40:59Don't even bother. They're not even in the relegation zone. Honestly, they may as well give up now. Spurs good, it's gone. Or Villa, or Palace. They have actual good footballers. Am I wrong? Only three clubs have ever suffered relegation from the Prem after winning the opening two games. One of them was Hull in 2016-17. It's possible. They've got history. It's a long long season. I love all the fan videos after their games where you have like the fans like being just properly. Mobile time. I love it. I do when they point you out. So what are we going for? We're going for reactionary content. We're going for there's 38 games.

41:38Which one are we going for? There's 38 games, but that's a bad start. Six points is huge though. I know, but you just said they're down. No, no, because there's 38 games. Yes, but let's break them down. There's different categories of games where we can win this. We might be able to steal something. A draw is good or we're not going to lose. so realistically the amount of how many games do you think are genuinely like Coventry go in thinking we should this is a winnable you know what I mean cover how so what I'm trying to say is there's probably in those games there's about 10 wins Brighton at home Forest this is in the league Forest away Newcastle at home Spurs away it's Premier League stuff late innit so like for Coventry in their season there's probably 10 games where they look at it's like these are games that we should win you know no no but there are the ones that you should because Yeah, so it's coming through looking at their fixture list and going, we're getting 30 points a minute.

42:26That's one gone straight away. Yeah, so now they have to turn one of the... Yeah, so now you have to get it back from somewhere else. It's not like... When you start chasing your tail, but then also, I understand your momentum point at the start, but also if you get a bit of momentum from Feb onwards, that's huge. Teams have done that before. On the contrary to that, Hull have beaten Man United, which they probably wouldn't have put that down as a game they couldn't get points from. they've then beaten their relegation rivals so they're on they're staying up it's a long season for everyone but like for when you're a team fighting relegation and a team fighting for the Premier League like there's a few games there that like turn it you can't afford them big slip ups and that's a massive one is Frank Lampard washed no not my Frank friend of the show Frank well I did say you'd be lucky to get six points or you've done well to get six points so you've done well.

43:24They have done well. But that is the last of your points. There you go Tigers you've got the Tom Garrett approval. Anyways. Eat balling. Moving to the film from that. Liverpool 2, Forest 2. Isaac's back. 2, Forest 2. He scored. After your rant last week and he goes and spags a worldie. Oh mate, what a goal by that. He's about to play Ipswich as well so he very well could be to see it. He's the captain of my field. I've seen it before his goal I've seen a screenshot it was like it was like Aguero's football rating from when he had a heart attack in a game and then Izak's rating to that point and it was like Aguero's like ahead of him he is absolutely Aguero could have scored beforehand come on man he got his tapping yeah but my god he looked so like he actually he actually looks a lot better after he scored confidence bit of confidence I will say we actually said this in his interviews he just looks a bit sad that step over I think he's such a confidence player Of course he is.

44:20Of course he is. He's been shattered for a year. His body language. He's best when he's like a cocky player and he's giving it all that on the pitch and he's feeling himself. Right now, he's barely getting the ball. They're not getting the ball to him. He had actually the joint fewest touches ever since Opta began. I think so, yeah. 14. One goal for 14 touches is pretty good. Mate, what a ratio. The move up for the goals is a great loss from Gakpo. And then after that, he did have some better touches linking up, but they've just got to get closer to him. They're miles away from him. Munoz's goal he's good yeah really great term could he be their right winger option then he should be I said this one at the start I think I had him in one of the I thought he looked better on the right I had him in one of the things he's done he's off the table from City but they are getting Bradley Barcola 123 million there's just so unnecessary in that money though how do you think that move's going to go where's it going to fit in is it going to succeed it'll be on the left him and Isaac are going to cut and Munoz will be on the right Rio is the understudy for Barcola, isn't it?

45:20Yeah. Do you see it working? No. Yeah. Going with that amount of talent, you kind of just expect him to do okay. But yeah, when does Zagatko drop to the bench now? What's going on? He's been one of their better players this season. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what they're going to do. But I guess they need strength and depth. I think Barcola is the best player in the world until he has to finish. So, I think we're going to see a lot of frustrating performances from him. But if he fix that part of his game, his talent's undeniable. it's an exciting signing I mean it's a lot of money but so what's Gakpo what's Gakpo think he's like right so I'm not going to play anymore and you're not selling me Gakpo might start Evan Munoz though on the right hand I think Munoz yeah maybe but I think Munoz is going to slowly work his way into the team he is genuinely really good but isn't that the point of having good competition you need depth yeah yeah I guess so a good sign if Forrest though Munoz right back yeah linking up with Oli G 22 million as well pretty decent yeah He's 30, isn't he?

46:17And he's got a year left, I think. Yeah. Good signing, though. Very good signing. RIP, ain't it, mate? Well, they're just continuing their... They wanted Henderson as well. They're just, like, Forrest are obsessed with Palace, aren't they? Well, no, I mean... Are you calling out Mr. Maranakis? No, sorry, Mr. Maranakis. It's a good deal. Do you think it's anything to do with the manager? It's a good business. Yeah, but they took... To be fair to Lewis, they took him originally anyway. Yeah, the SCJ. Yeah, but they've been taking him from Palace. he was a free agent right but I mean to build it around but it is actually yeah how dare you without Mr Maranakis he's taken a homeless man in made him his manager and you're swagging him on sent him to Nottingham yeah what's wrong with Nottingham great houses great houses I know so I know how bad it is great houses Nottingham's better than Leicester Sherwood Forest yeah that is true Sherwood Forest Sherwood Forest that's where Robin Hood's from yep nice and Big John there's a pop world as well there is a pop world yeah and a hooters a what world a pop world there is a hooters I've been, have you been?

47:15Yeah. Great, great mozzarella dippers. Yeah. Yeah, just on the side track. Obviously, Hooters is great for many reasons, but... The food's really good. Hooters is good for food. Mate, I've been Hooters in Miami, Hooters in Nottingham. It's the only reason I go. Yeah. I only go for the mozzarella dippers. Mate, the ones in the UK are fantastic, but the ones in America... The ones in America, they're really good for sport as well. Yeah, they are. Great, great location, great spot. Sorry, tips. You can... Tips are great. You don't have to tip. Yeah but they're great tips Because you don't have to tip No Tips Yes Man City won 4-1 Cherky decided to Switch on after He got told off at half time Palace are in a bit of trouble They're in a lot of trouble Yeah Like a lot of trouble Like so much trouble I wanted to put them in A relegation zone I couldn't do that To stand out So I put Forest there But my whole heart Believed that Palace That's gone horribly wrong already Oh here we go That's gone wrong already Here we go So, Palace have been punished by Forest.

48:14By the way, you can't see your prediction. Say that again. No. Say it again. Do you think that's a terrible prediction at this point? Forest going down. No, I wholeheartedly thought Palace would be there, but I couldn't do it to my boy. You're a liar. What the fuck? Why would you ever give a fuck about that? What, my friend? No, stop lying. Why would I give a flip? A flying flip about my friend. Yeah, Gladys has gone by Christmas anyways. Which is not going to happen on it. did you see it that start of the season Cherky Cherky first half was just a bit of a lazy bastard wasn't he he came out in his interview and said I've got to do more I've got to feed Haaland well yeah he also said he was going to get dragged at half time he begged for two more minutes he said I was playing shit yeah and then Haaland laughed yeah and then Haaland went why don't you actually see what you actually think is that how Haaland he actually said that he actually said that he said that to Cherky and Cherky was like I just want to give assist to my team yeah he's Yeah, he's got to be the most enjoyable player to watch when he's on it.

49:13Yeah, when he's on it. There's not many of him about these days. The first goal, the way he's topo, disgusting. Is this a bit of a, not a breakout, because he was good last year, but it's just a season where we see Cherky really... He was good last season. He holds his minutes in the tent, yeah. If he's going to start, yeah. If Forden's not doing well, we're still hoping for Forden. He's still being rubbish. Like, Cherky can go in and be the part. Doki's going to be coming back, though. It's competition. Yeah, but then he'll be Semenya on the right, won't he? Keeping mid-sentence and kills. Also, never mind that.

49:39Whoever holds that 10 down between Cherky and Foden is going to go on to have a great season, I think. It's going to be Cherky. Yeah. Foden's playing. Buwadi-Anderson, Cherky midfield. Did get two assists. It's quite lightweight, but also at the same time, they're pretty good. Foden did get two assists. Did you watch the game? Yeah. He should have scored twice. Also highlights. No, I did watch the game because I watched it at home. Foden didn't play well, mate. I didn't say he played well. I should have said he got two assists. He should have definitely scored. So that's decent for his team. Yeah, he missed a sit-up first.

50:03Was it first off? First off, yeah. Buadi looked good when he came on as well he controlled the game very well they don't tend to make bad signings when they spend a lot Buadi did the basics so well he's an unbelievable passer he just controlled it he instantly got he demanded the ball he could be the key to unlock Anderson because Anderson is not going to have to do that dictating role no Buadi's going to play which I think he will yeah it'll be Anderson Anderson was good though he's going to be great in the away game winning the ball he ran his socks off again yeah He always does Don't you? Yeah Elliot As you know Have people written off City too soon?

50:40No I still think they'll get loads of points But obviously It is Palace We need to settle down It is Palace And Bournemouth It was a late turnaround Yeah They just calmed down a bit Their squad Their squad is good Squad is good from Yeah the players are really good I was really happy Because I had a bet on Haaland first goal City 3-1 Did you? Oh nice It was 4-1 Both came in then It was 4-1 Yeah I know It was a joke mate so that was when they scored the fourth I was just fucking and they've signed Alan and you're Captain Palmer yes wait so there's even more competition for the wingings for the wingings Alan yeah Alan who's Alan 22 year old Brazilian winger Alan from where Ameras yeah cool big off Alan no I don't think I think City look good like they they are good but I don't think they're going to be challenging Arsenal not close no yeah I think City-Chelsea would be an interesting second place.

51:36Yes, I agree. I agree. But Miss Maresca is fucking broad, isn't he? He just looks like Pep, though. It's really weird. He is Pep. Like, on the sideline. How do you know it's not Pep in a suit? I don't know that. Pep mask. Yeah. Have you ever actually looked at Pep, realistically? Shit, you're right. Have you ever met him? Pep. Been around him, technically, so. What does that mean? So, no. I wasn't allowed to go up to him. They weren't allowed, or they didn't want you to. How have you managed to answer that question without answering it? Well, I was on the touchline with him before the game. Did you meet, have you met Pe?

52:07I didn't speak to him, no. It's a yes or no. I stood next to him, but I wouldn't like to talk to him. Still hasn't said yes or no. So no. Have you met Pe? Yeah. No. I've met him, but I never spoke to him. He's a friend of the show. I've heard enough. He's a friend of the show. Moving on to our top 10 current Premier League captains, ladies and gentlemen. Yeah. Interesting. Because what is a captain to you? what is captain to you a person that sets the culture and leads which captain to you exceeds just like somebody who's been at the club for a while yeah yeah someone who's not been sold and still around get prepared for my arguments I'm going to be honest I don't yeah I'm not I haven't got I don't mind before we started Lou and me have had a discussion both felt differently about this topic what do we think of with this topic because my reasoning is going to be he's good at football and he's been at the club longest and he's been the leader and that's I think for the most part captains set the standard they're part of the culture they're the leader in terms of mentorship on the pitch that answer is normally the same for each of these people on the list whereas if you're ranking like a football player like there's so many reasons to be a good captain it's normally because you're either a good leader or you're best at the club no that's not true it really is it comes down to it's normally the best player or a really good leader who's been there a while.

53:30It's always up. He leads by example as well. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But he's not always the best player. Vandes could be a good captain. Yeah. Wow. Do you want to do the segment as well, Will? But Spurs' captain on the weekend was van der Ven. Yeah, he wouldn't go anywhere near the top 10. Yeah, he's fucking shit, mate. There's only 20. I also thought, I was like, fuck it up, I don't even think these are good captains by the bottom of it. I'll go. I don't care. Okay, fine. I mean, I posed myself going fast. You've got reasons. Yeah, I wrote them out. Really big breaking news. You've got reasons?

54:02Yeah, I wrote them out. Aston Villa have signed Ibrahim Mdai. Yeah, he was in the game last night. He was in the stands yesterday. He was one of the ones they cut to. Breaking news. Tom, I do want some reasons from you here. Okay. I won't be arguing it, though, because... No, I'm going to grill you. Oh, we will. Oh, you're getting grilled. So mundane. Tenth, I've gone dunk. What the fuck? I think that's actually quite low. What? he's a fantastic captain he's literally been one of the figureheads of getting them into Europe yeah he's been there for how long I don't even know his performances haven't been great also like he was out of the team a lot last season he's a great captain yeah but also I think to be a captain you have to be playing too he is playing he is now the only slant I have on Donk is like you're really going to take instructions from a guy called Donk yeah you are Louis Donk absolutely this is why we've got different lists He's the figurehead of Brighton and Hove Albion football club Actually That doesn't mean a lot No for You're the figurehead of Why doesn't it mean a lot Why doesn't it mean a lot though He got me to Europe Because he's Brighton They're tiny No one gives a fuck about him Can I ask a question What Exactly He's a fantastic captain That's been a new I wasn't Can I ask a question Yeah Where do we stand on like He's in my list Where do we stand on like Captains should also have like One of the bigger Rolls Penises No not rolls One of the bigger penises in the dressing Like if you're a captain I'm not even joking about it If you're on the show and your captain has like a three inch cock it's like I'm losing you're not listening to him.

55:29Yeah he was there in League One Lewis Dunk. Yeah mate he's in a great school war. I don't mind. I just didn't sit here. Oh you didn't have the knowledge on Lewis Dunk is that what you're saying so say sorry. He's got I'm going to apologise to Lewis Dunk. He's probably a cool legend. Theo was just on Wikipedia there. Yeah I wanted to check that he'd been in League One. I knew he'd been in the Championship but he played two seasons in League One. Did he know how many games he played without looking? Nine. It's not far off to be fair. He played nine games in league six so that's when he come through the academy basically yeah right uh yeah that dunks is still and he's solid it's just yeah he's a decent probably has a big box but he does have a bit of uh i have gone adam smith for similar reasons uh i thought i've gone tokovsky for the penis reason yeah it is it i actually do think it comes into a fair no it really does he also i feel like tokovsky is a captain that does step up i actually feel that's low it did on the week Tarkovsky reminds me of what I consider like an old school captain.

56:26Yeah, that's, yeah. I think Adam Smith's like. But I think I prefer captains who lead by example and lead without just shouting and bawling. I think there's better ways to lead. In my opinion, that's just my... Can I ask you a little question on the likes of Dunk and Smith? These are all players that have maybe when they got into the Premier League, people started writing them off. I know Dunk said might not be good enough, but they've adapted. Is that not a kind of a leader in itself? Absolutely. Adam Smith especially as well he's one of the first names on the team sheet and he shouldn't be well he's pretty good yeah but you could get a better right back Bournemouth could sign a better right back well yeah he's not that bad anymore but they kind of did they still kept me laughing with your massive muscles they actually did sign the right back yeah they did and then yeah that's true he's gone now yeah so he's back in the team he's gone with the wind Do you think I'd also say Smith doesn't play Every game But he's just so solid I think he's just A solid leader I'm not even on him I'm on Tarkovsky Right 7 I have gone Erdegaard Wow Yeah I quite like him As a leader I don't like him But do we not I think Ray should be captain But also To a degree Even in terms of like You see it with Norway Like He doesn't necessarily Need to be The major I think Erdegaard But he leads I think Erdegaard is really well liked.

57:50I think he sets standards on and off the pitch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think he's... We've said, though, we've reached him a lot, but not shown up in big moments. Yeah, that's... You know what I mean? As captain... In terms of ability and performance, yeah, I criticize him, but in terms of being a captain leader, I think, and what he's done for Arsenal, he's been a captain at a time where the culture's completely changed. Yeah, he's been a big part of that. And again, he's seventh. I thought you'd agree you'd want race. Yeah, but that's That's why I also agree with his point that he's a little bit lower down.

58:22He's definitely top 10, but I don't think you could put him that high for that reason. I imagine, I just feel like if you haven't showed, if you weren't missing in big games and everyone also unanimously agrees you'd rather a different player's captain, you can't... Yeah, but you know who doesn't agree that it should be changed? The club and the management and the staff? And also, he did lead Arsenal to a Premier League and a Champions League final. Huh? To back your point up. What did you say? He did lead Arsenal to a Premier League But even just to double up the point, going back to it Harland thinks he's a good captain for Norway that's a good bit of evidence to know that he's a good captain yeah I'm going to ship on my top 10 list is it 4 years he's been captain and he's only 27 so he's he was a young captain the problem the problem people have with Erdogan is he's not as Tom said like a traditional old school football captain people think a captain just scream and shout about and stuff scream and shout and let it See, I've gone Gibbs White.

59:20Wow. I really like Gibbs White as a captain. I think he's the epitome of lead by example. Yeah. And drag your team across lines. Fifth, I've gone Rhys James. I really like Rhys James as a captain. And he's starting to shatter people now. Did you see him having a go to Neto the other day? No. Neto, holding to shush. No respect. Absolutely. Didn't respect the badge. Of course. But again, James, I didn't think he had that in him. But against the Fulham one, he was very on it with people. than that people but he's usually more by example was Yates not captain he was White's the captain no Ryan Yates is the club captain but Ryan Yates doesn't really play he gives White's the captain now he's the captain now but Ryan Yates is the club captain if that makes sense it's the same as Dan Byrne isn't it yeah Charles is currently standing captain it would be a bit silly to put someone in he doesn't play you've got Ryan Yates I'm not saying but what we have just so we're clear as we're moving forward we've established like captains more than just on field isn't it look you see how I've got Lou you see how I've got that I don't see others in brackets the real captain I don't want to see others yeah right four I've gone Ampadu yeah Ampadu yeah I think he's a brilliant captain for Leeds yeah I agree and I didn't think coming into last season he'd even be playing but he's cementing himself as probably their best midfielder Leeds fans arguably think he's the most important player don't they third I have gone Van Dijk third whoa whoa Whoa, stinker alert from Tom Garrett.

1:00:49I do not agree with that. Third, it's hella low, bro. Low? Yeah. Yeah. What, low as in he should be higher? That's what low means, yeah. No, as in... No, low as in he should be lower. No, low as in he should be higher in terms of number. Yeah. So he should be like 10th. No, he should be second. What the fuck? What the fuck have you done? What the hell? Low as in he should be lower and he needs a higher number. No, because I meant lower on my list. He's the best captain in the league. No, he's not. Yeah, I agree. I know he's not the best captain in the league. I agree. I agree, he is. I agree with what I've just said.

1:01:25I think there's two way better captains. Yeah. Second, Xhaka. Yeah. First, McGinn. John McGinn. Do you think he's number one? I think he's the best captain. Off the base, off the stick of the bubble. And this is also little things like, I know. Is it because you just listen to a podcast with him? No, it's just speaking to... Nothing to do with the podcast. Nothing to do with that. Nothing to do with that. No, no, of course not. I think he's the epitome of, he epitomises Villa, but also speaking to people like Joe Tomlinson and that, he says anytime, he says McGinn's the best person. Like if you go there, usually you're waiting four or five hours for players to come out.

1:01:56If McGinn sees you, he comes in, goes and gets players. But I heard, well, he said it himself on the Sixth Football pod, like Unai Emery's often just never in the dressing room. Yeah. And he's the one running everything. I just think, yeah, I think those three are probably, no, I was definitely set on McGinn and Xhaka as my top two, like definitely really because I think because I think when when Liverpool have been at their absolute best Van Dijk hasn't been captain mmm always firing what you mean Henderson Henderson's a better captain and leader than Van Dijk I think I just Henderson sorry Van Dijk does control that team though didn't he like he sets a standard he's actually convinced me the other way out I'm honest that was a really good argument

1:02:45when things have gone badly Van Dijk has arguably what have they done achieve as well you're fucking I wasn't even I just look at Van Dijk that's a captain I don't look at Van Dijk as a captain I think he's obviously you know I think he's the best centre half you don't look at him as a leader I think he I could see him being a leader but I look at Xhaka and McGinn more like yeah I look at Van Dijk I say he owns that team I think he'd have really good standards but you didn't think that when Henderson was captain I would argue that Van Dijk was low key to captain when Henderson did it that's why they brought Henderson for his leadership in England absolutely Because everyone loves him.

1:03:22Very quickly, I don't want to ruin it because you might have him in. Yeah, I know what you're going to say. No Bruno Fernandes. Yeah. No. Why? Because I don't really rate him as a captain. I think he's a great footballer. Stinker. That's crazy. Oh, well. I get he got criticised in the past. I don't like all the arm flailing and I don't like all that. And I don't like... He's got 21 assists. He's just got a hat trick. He does what you would argue that Gibbs White does. I think he... Gibbs White ain't running around Momo. Not winning games for them. Did you watch Bruno's interview after the game against Ipswich?

1:03:53Let me guess, he said really nice things because they won. No, I just think he's... Since Ronaldo... He's maturing into a very good leader. Absolutely. And I think the way he spoke after the game is how a captain should speak. And it wasn't... He scored a hat-trick but he didn't want to talk about it. It was all about the team and improving. And I know that you're media trained and all that but I think he's showing maturity and levels to his game now. It's about time because he's like 30. He's fucking took a while you little dick. Also, he's got a small dick, so I didn't put him in. That's true.

1:04:24I reckon you've had a stinker list, by the way. Have I? Yeah, stinker list. I wouldn't love a recovery. Right, I'll do mine then. Tenth that have Adam Smith. What's your reasoning, bro? That's quite low. Part of the Bournemouth culture for a decade. He's been like 15 years. That is well low. 12 years, I think. He runs... How can you have him tenth? That's a fucking stinker, bro. Why can't I have him tenth? God, look, all this is making me angry. There's nine others that I just see. No, you can't say that's your reason. No, no. Why is Adam Smith so low? Because I think with a full strength team, he wouldn't be playing with you.

1:04:58Off the pitch, he runs that shit. You know how much inside out. He's been there 11 years, man. How do you know he doesn't bully everyone? He'll know every single person in that building. You've both got him live third. Mate, Adam Smith should be far higher than that. He should do. There's only 10 people there. My list is the order of how long they've been at the club. He's played two out of two this year. He played 23 last year. He also knows every fan. Yeah, he knows all. 15 of them. Don't go at the cherry bodies like that No I do have Verdegaard I really like him as a captain But I understand the argument That people think it should be Rice Or Rhea or Gabriel or Saliba That's the only argument Why he couldn't be higher Because within the club Everybody loves him as the captain But objectively people think Likeable guy Yeah I think the captain should be feared Eighth have gone Ruben Diaz I think since day one He's been a leader In a squad full of superstars To be fair He's a great leader.

1:05:48He won player of the year in his first season. If you're Paul Maia Janna, you're a leader for the group. They broke up, aren't they? But he's not high because he's starting to get phased out. You're going to respect him, aren't you? Seventh, seems a little bit blasphemy, but I've got John McGinn. Seven? Yeah. That's great. Did you watch the podcast? I did watch it, yeah. Runs the dressing room, obviously. I didn't think you'd get any worse than Tom's list. Your list's shit. Sick, I'm for do for the same reasons. You think he's a better leader than John McGinn? Better captain Yeah I think if you're In and around I think John McGinn Epitomises leadership Though doesn't he You like that word Did he Well I used it before Epitomise I can't believe He's a bit off me You actually stink Oh yeah sorry Fucking vocab expert Fifth Nathan Collins Better captain Than John McGinn Nathan Collins Yeah what's wrong with that P You Was he even a captain Last year Something in here sticks He plays every minute Pretty much every game And he's obviously captain Is he Obviously Over like over McGee yeah I mean I said that one might be a stinker but everybody else I'm kind of happy with fourth Bruna Fernandes I think you've seen this season he doesn't shy away from responsibility certainly in previous seasons as well I think he's well yeah who's the is it Coyle Coyle Coyle's the captain for Hull yeah third Tarkovsky what I really think bro your list is staking I don't understand why you think that's high why is Tarkovsky such a good captain He's big Every centre-back Yeah And big moments from him as well By the way But he did do a documentary So he has to lose points for that On about shagging as well What's your five activities?

1:07:27How should we tell them?

1:07:32Yeah honestly He has to lose points for that Loki sounded like Daniel Farker there That sounded German No he sounded Farker yeah No he didn't Second Granit Xhaka And first Van Dijk I think the most organic leader on the list Reeve you've had a stick Van Dijk's not a better leader than Xhaka. I think he is. Give me a response. He wouldn't lead that Stringland team the way Xhaka led them last year. Also, I like my captain to be in the middle of the par. Yeah, but centre-back's also a great position for a captain. Fantastic. Some of the best captains of all time are centre-backs. For me, centre-backs definitely take preference.

1:08:08I like my captain to be in midfield. I like my captain... Big and strong. Muscular Right He's the correct list boys Alright Shout out to Dan Byrne He hasn't had enough time yet Cause 10th Malik Chow You know One day he'll be in there This season 10th Lewis Coyle Why Would you like him As a captain Led them On an amazing Promotion charge An amazing promotion charge Against all the odds And then Into the Premier League Up against all odds 6 points Yes Title charge That's going on. Is it not a bit of an early goal? Why don't you go with Grimes? Why don't you go with Grimes? He led them to the title.

1:08:52Yeah, yeah, but obviously having an extended... I'm not even sure if Grimes was the captain last year. Look, how about this? I could captain Arsenal to a Premier League. I never know who captains are. Don't look at it. Yeah. For you, everyone's equal, Tom. You don't bother. They aren't bad. Yeah. Well, they have, like, leadership groups now, don't they? That's war. Now, Lewis Coyle, man. Respect the game. Louis. Louis Coyle. It's Louis. It's Louis. Louis. I.E. No S. His name's Louis Coyle. Let's agree to degree. What have you? To degree. Did you write down Louis? Nah, yes. Nine, we've got dunk.

1:09:24We've all spoken about it. Dunk on those hoes. Yeah, I'm going to dunk on that bitch. Oh. It's got Yates. No, like... He is club captain. Let me tell you right now, right? He's club captain. You just need to listen to this back home. You might not be starting for your team. You might not be the main member of your team at work, but you can be a leader off the pitch you can support those give them massages it's like what the old Leeds manager used to do in the Damned United he rubbed those boys down with his bare hands and that's what Yates does Gibbs White come on there pants down we're giving you a rub getting them ready I do think he embodies the forest culture well but he doesn't play been there 12 years yeah but it's difficult to put a guy in that's just not getting 12 years he's the one person who survived Mr Maranakis Mr Maranakis has kept him but does like captaincy on the field count for something as well.

1:10:14I think Gibbs White is a captain in all but name any of the minutes. It's just, they're not going to... Why are you doing that? They're not going to strip Yates. Honestly, you should actually get deducted because you've named someone who's not a captain. No, he is the captain. I didn't name Gibbs White. He's a captain when he's... He's vice captain. Yeah, he's vice captain. He's vice captain. He's not actually captain. Vice captain. So he's our captain. Wait, let me ask you a question. Who was captain? Who was captain against Liverpool? No, that's not what this is. It's in the name. That's not what this is.

1:10:43You actually should be deducted points. Now think of it. All right, then take my points off. Take it. I didn't say it. Just trying to find the last time Ryan Yates was the captain. He's the captain right now. You've been captain off the pitch. He played a lot in the rugby league last year. I am sweating my tits off. Sweating my tits off. Seventh, we've got Tarkovsky. Sixth, we've got Jam again. Didn't you have a go at me for putting him down there as well? No idea. Fucking hell. I think he epitomizes everything to take. I thought McGinn, Xhaka and Van Dijk would be the definite top three. Yeah, but I would agree with that.

1:11:16For me, last year, in my mind, you could consider Emi Martinez as a captain of that team. That's disgusting. Shut up, mate. You're on a belt. You make me feel disgustingly sick. Goalkeepers should never be captain. That isn't even close to them all. McGinn was captain last year. That's what I'm saying. So it wasn't even Martinez? Yeah, but the argument for Odegaard not being captain because you can see other people in that team being it is the same for Jaka. Martinez wasn't even good for them last year. McGinn was one of the best players. Garmigan. That's got nothing to do with it. He's the captain.

1:11:42Yeah, but in terms of leadership. What, just because he shouts and goes, oh, and says Dibu, like... Says Dibu? Yeah, oh, my name's Dibu. Fuck that, mate. I don't think goalkeepers should be captains. You can't even fucking hear them. Miles away. And they're mental, all of them. No, McGinn's like, he's been there since, like, the championship. Yeah, yeah. As we fondly found out in the podcast. No, I knew that. Yeah. He did a fucking right to glory around him. Fifth. Kearney. The fans literally Fucking love him Are you joking No A guy that just Doesn't get game time Is he even there Isn't he left Isn't Calvin Bassey The captain I think it is Bassey No Kearney's the captain No Calvin Bassey's Club captain is he not No Tom Kearney Will be club captain Bassey is You ask any Fuller fan What they think about Kearney No they love Tom Kearney But he doesn't play He's the leader Has he played a game This season yet Yeah it's been two games Give him a second Will he's boy No three Two He's moving across The punditry anyway mate Premier League captains not League Cup captains no he's the leader of the pitch he's been there 15 years he's actually injured he's sacrificed there was that video of him crying when they were showing him a video and she was saying how much he loved him and how much he changed his life he last started a game for Fulham in the 9th of May and that was his only start since April yeah I think it's tough to put in someone that's just not playing and he's injured though he's injured no no no you're a fucking idiot like me I'll fucking put him in mate he had fucking why's he a better captain who were you laughing at him for again why's he a better captain than John McGee Honestly mate I don't know I think this is stupid Oh Oh he's given up with it He's been Pinned to the corner He's been pinned to the corner That he's now Kicking off Like are you supposed To judge a captain It's like I'm not Somebody that plays Does help But I don't see We don't see Like 99 % Of the captains So then you base it On things you can see Like leading your club Do you know what I can see Him making a grown woman cry About what he's done For a club That's what I can see.

1:13:42And you don't think fans are saying that about McGinn? Lewis, what you've done is... John McGinn, who's led them. Yeah, he's sick. He's led them to overachieve. Well done. Every year. He's a poor verdict, again. Did you know Calvin Bastion was a standing captain? He's a vice captain. Did you Google Premier League captains or did you go on the games and see who's actually captains? He has been consistent. He said Yates and Ken. So he's not like picking on him. He was consistently shit and wrong. Why Kenny over McGinn? Sorry, I'm actually picking the captains and not the vice captains. Why Kenny over McGinn?

1:14:14I can't even know. You've been there longer. And also that you made the fans cry. Do you think? So based on longevity of playing. It's 11. If based on longevity of playing for the club, why is Kenny so much higher than Lewis Duncan, your opinion? Yeah. He's been there longer, number one. No, he hasn't. But has he played more games? Yes. Doubt it. He hasn't been there longer than Dunk, has he? A bit more games is irrelevant. Dunk was there as a youth captain. Ironically, Dunk. Do you know what? So this is an off-the-pitch captains list. He's just a great guy. Friend of the show, actually. So do you want some comparisons between Dunk and...

1:14:50So in 2009, Dunk was at Brighton. In 2009, Tom Kearney was at Hull. And then he didn't sign for... That's quite a long time. 17 years. 17 years, Lewis. So Dunk's been there seven years longer as a pro. he's been there all through the youth but you but obviously you base it more on longevity said Kenny's above dunk nice well done buddy I'm just double checking dunk was the fourth Adam Smith yeah I like that yeah I've been there so long he's just been there so long yeah he was born in Brighton third Jacka he's only been there two years yeah that's just crazy mate that's pedigree though for longevity He's a dog.

1:15:36And also, help him achieve things. Adam Smith's been at... 15 years. Is it 12 years? 10 years, 12 years? 15, yeah. Second Van Dyke and first Bruno Fernandes. Bruno Fernandes. Bruno. You think Bruno's the best captain of the league? Let me tell you right now. Go on, tell me why. Let me tell you. Tell me why. Right, Bruno Fernandes has number one. It's why I respect Mark Noble. He's had to endure the biggest heap of shit ever. Yeah, no, he's because he's flyly told and moan about it. Let me finish. Let me finish He has to endure The worst period Of Man United ever And he has stuck it out Why? I don't know But he has anyways He has stuck it out And I will admit He was a huge Massive rat But once Ronaldo left He was like I'm the only rat here now And he has done A great job In stopping them From getting relegated He's the only reason Man United are still A team that can Actually attract players Yeah he's the reason He's the only reason Amongst this terrible Man United team He has dragged them through from yesterday's season relegation battle to Champions League from relegation battle to Champions League was purely they weren't in a relegation battle oh yes they were Thomas Garrett no they weren't oh yes they were yes they were actually how because they were close no they weren't yes they were they were miles clearing the relegation zone saying it like that how long do you think Bruno's been the captain of United out of interest since Ronaldo left that's facts mate Bruno Fernand look I respect jokes aside I respect the player Man United work I respect of specter player about 20 points of relegation who can go and do better but says no i'm gonna stay in the hell i i can leave and do nearly 20 points from relegation i'm bruno fernandez i could go and play for nearly 20 points from relegation there were nearly 20 points from being relegated could bruno fernandez went on achieved more if he left yeah probably stayed and stuck it out with man united because no one no big clubs gonna sign a 30 year old he hasn't always been 30.

1:17:29Bruno should definitely be in the list. But there's a reason he's a better captain than, like, because he's also at Man United. No, because he stayed, though. He could have left. It's like Mark Noble. He could have left and got an England cap, but he's not sticking it out. What? It's like Jared Boyd. It's like Jared Boyd. It's like Jared Boyd. I could go back to the Rams. It's like Jared Boyd. England learning to sign him. Do you ever think you're too far down the Rams? Yeah, you've fucked up. Mark Noble could have left and got an England cap somewhere. No, he couldn't have. Yeah, he couldn't have.

1:17:54Who could he left to? Liverpool. Do you think sometimes, like, winning things as captain means? He won things, though. He has won things. They would not have won stuff if he left. They would have had nothing. Jokes aside, they would have had nothing if Bruno left, and he actually stuck by them. I don't know why. That's fucking... You're acting like I'm crazy here. You're acting like I'm crazy, guys. No, no, no. Having him in the list is so fine. Can I ask you a question? If you were to be a professional footballer, yeah, who would you want to play for most as your captain in your list? Well, I'd rather...

1:18:25That's kind of how I looked at it as well. Yeah. who would you want to play for no because no because like no because the team you're playing for is rather like playing like Man United they need Bruno because he's not necessarily going to be the best leader but he's set to stand as a player they need him as a player they don't need him as a captain but he's a maverick in that team but mavericks aren't often a captain a captain can lead the maverick obviously the maverick usually needs a captain next to them with a level head and like a solid base no not always though like a Henderson that's why Henderson was such a good captain for Liverpool He wasn't the best player.

1:18:58Sometimes you need a rat who's going to drag you through hell and that's what he is. I don't agree. I think he's too selfish to be a captain personally. I used to hate him but trust me, it hurts me more than anyone but he's the best captain. I don't know if that's true. Go on then Theo because that was wow rough. Actually, wow. Just to let you know, I put Howler for the title after that second. What's not Howler? That's really good. I'm sweating. Fuck me. I think I've got the best list. In 10, I've got Gibbs White. I think everything you said was correct. Yeah, well, shock. Yes. Vice captain. By the way, like...

1:19:28How are we getting away with having vice captains in the captain? I didn't put it. Because Gibbs White is the captain. He's not the captain. It's completely relevant He wears the armband every week. He is officially not the captain. But he does wear the armband every week. He's officially not the captain. He does wear the armband every week. He's vice captain. He is captain. No, I know. If Yates is on the pitch, who's captain? Yates never on the pitch. No, if Yates is on the pitch, who's captain? Yeah, but Gibbs White is also a captain technically. No, no, no. He's a captain. This is actually unacceptable.

1:19:53You need to hold your hand up and accept that you've actually put someone in who's ineligible. Have you got Ryan Yates in the list? It's not how it works. Gibbs White brackets Ryan Yates. They morph into one. If you type it in, who's the captain? It's Ryan Yates. We know that. It's yours, Ryan Yates. Yeah, you haven't got the captain. You pick and pick someone who's not the captain. But Gibbs White is the captain. He wears the armband. Who wears the armband? In the stead of the captain being missing. Yeah, you've had a stinker. Yeah, I've had a stinker. Yeah, tell him to. Number nine. I'm so passionate about this.

1:20:23I got Rhys James. Number eight, I got Tarkowski. Number seven, I got Amper. You're on about, that year's argument applies to Rhys James and who's missed like five seasons. Yeah, that's why I confirm it. He played last week. He played about 45 games last season. The last year or so, James hasn't missed that many games. He's played 45 games last season. He's got shit though anyways. What? He played about 45 games last season. You think he's shit as well? You've taken him out your FPL? Yeah, he's been shit for FPL. Shit in football as well. He played well against Fulham. He just didn't get me any points and he got books so I took him out I don't think using FPL is an argument in this I also took Gibbs Wright out of my FPL you choose your captain in FPL how many games did he play last year oh my god so number one I've got Erling Haaland as my FPL captain who was everyone's triple captain stop asking for tips bro you're on camera you're going to get minus 500 but 44 games last season ironically Bruno was my captain this week and I still don't think he's the number one Rhys James played more games last season since 2020 so So, hold on.

1:21:21You have Gibbs White as your best captain. Tarkowski and Padua in seven. I've got Lewis Duncan in six. I've got Bruno Fernandes in five. I've got Adam Smith in four. I've got John McGinn in three. Xhaka in two and Van Dijk one. That's a stinker. Yes. Why is that a stinker? You've got a guy who's not captain, ten. So is these two. I don't have Gibbs White. Why does he keep pointing the finger at me? Well, you should be. That's why it's a stinker. I don't have him. You've got Ryan Haynes. No, you agree with that list. I know you'll feel really passionate about that one. and let me know if you think Lewis will ever have sex again.

1:21:55Your list has made his list look good. My list is good. I think my team's going to agree. I'm fine with mine. I just decided who I'd want to play for the most. He's got Nathan Collins in there. He's a good captain. What's wrong with what? He's a shit captain. He's a very good captain at Brentford. He's a shit captain. He's actually terrible. He plays every minute of every game. How's that not a good captain? He's ginger. Is he? No he's not He's blonde isn't he Nah He's blonde Ginger Are you thinking of Collins usually Set off a West Ham Oh my god He is Nah he's ginger No you are You're thinking of him Nah No you are You are a fucking idiot Nah I'm joking We have a huge game At the weekend It's title Contenders Contenders Versus Title contenders How do we see this one going Arsenal win I think there's going to be goals actually I think 2-1 Arsenal a good defence versus a good attack I think 2-1 as well it's actually a good defence versus a good attack versus a bad attack versus a bad defence literally exactly that mate shit that's mental is this where we see how good Chelsea actually are yeah it'd be a good test for Chelsea where's it at the Emirates is that no it's at Stafford Bridge ooh Concer will be starting I believe first Arsenal game wait no I think it is actually at Emirates it's at the Emirates I was going to say we just played away at Villa can I go third and they played at home yeah go on then no no no No, no, no, no.

1:23:18Explain what we do first. You can't go first. Why? It's a draft. No, it's not. It is. Why can't I go first? It's a draft 11. It's a draft. Oh, shit. Do we get a pick? No. Did nobody... Why did nobody read the fucking... I know it's a draft 11, but why can't I pick first? Oh, you can pick first. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. They've done a team. Oh, shit. I don't mind. Is it a draft? Yeah, you've got a thing at the top of your head now. You've got a thing at the top of your head now. I didn't read that We have got a wheel shit Oh, no, oh, this is a hauler So then person to the left of them will go after yeah

1:23:55Read the prayer. I thought I did share Henry if that's okay, very good remember to write down here you get boys I don't know if I did it in a prep work for my players I've completely not read this because I thought it was this season at least I've done all time I did a command 11 for this season I did all time Chelsea 11 right I'll go

1:24:20I'll go Lampard who scores next now? me round I'm going to go you get two I'm going to go Terry okay I'm going to go Hazard like that and I'm also going to go

1:24:40Kanter that's a great pick I'm going to go Drogba one Arsenal player pick so far are they? yeah I think the best positions to get yeah I'm going to go oh I'm going to go Ashley Cole. Yeah, I think that was the number one to go for. Left back's the hardest one. Play three in the back, mate. So is it two for me? No, it's the same formation. It's a draft 11. You make your own team, brother. Do whatever you want. You play one at the back if you want, Theo. One at the back? With pace and attack. I will go Vieira and Fabregas.

1:25:28Okay, I'll go... what's happening here with the order two two two two goes around i'm gonna go van percy started that way and then every time we do a draft we do this yeah crazy isn't it it's like oh so you've just taken viera and fabricate and you've taken kante kante and hazard phil you always have terrible teams on this yeah it's even better when you do it from memory well my mid my mid my my are you looking at my midfield i've got is viera kante lampard well i've got lampard and you got lampard use that all brain he has it yes i'm gonna go for oh i'm gonna go for rice terrible pick stinker terrible terrible pick i need a midfield um i'm gonna go oh i'm gonna go oh yeah you sexy bitch going robin yeah nice and then i'm gonna go gabriel oh i like that a lot mate my my my yeah you get a single pick uh let's go Claude yeah I've only got Maca-Lay-Leh Maca-Lay-Leh I'm going to go with Essien yeah nice like that I will go with Bergkamp and Carvalho first Chelsea player yeah

1:27:14I'm a page five I'm going to go Saliba

1:27:26I'm going to go

1:27:31Perez

1:27:35What's wrong with that? I'm going to go Thiago Silva and Sol Campbell Yeah I was going to try and get Silva You bastard Oh Come on then Theo Tony Adams my three of the back is cooking. I'm gonna go we

1:27:59Me

1:28:14I think I'll go with fuck it give me Palmer oh right I will go that's a midfield Have we got formations in mind yet? Yeah. I've gone full three-three. Yeah. Alexis Sanchez. No, that's who I was going for next. You bastard. And. Bollocks. I will go. Rhys James. Rhys James. I can't believe people haven't picked a certain player yet. I'm going to go. with what? Well it depends it's positionally though isn't it? I think that's quite easy to fill I'm going to go with I'm going to go Zola Yeah nice definitely my considerations I'm going to go Petr Cech I'm going to go Costa and then Douglas Costa Diego Costa and then I'm going to go Diego Costa I'm going to Costa that's a good pick yeah it's a good pick second best Chelsea striker ever probably Kai Sado as well me again can you tell me my team's midline can you tell me about the formation you're playing here I'm 3-5-3 what?

1:29:44what? no 3-5 what am I doing? I'm 4-4-4 right you're next okay your formation is mentally I'm going to go Shit Oh shit I thought I was cooking You're going to have to put Robin left wing back Neto Get Neto in I've got Hazard and Robin And they're infamous With Trappenbach Yeah I'm going to go Mesut Ozil I'm going to go Asper Leclerc Right back Saka And Raya.

1:30:30I'll finish my front line with over Mars. Bit of pace. So I need full back and right winger. I'm going to go.

1:30:48You're miles off it, son. Oh, I thought I was really on to something. No, you're so bad. I don't think it's room. Let's go Loren Okay no I've got a great idea Is it my turn? Yep Gonna go Hasselbank It's actually not a bad pick Because now And then Raya Can't Already gone Check Already gone Already gone Try and name another keeper Portoie Yeah He's not been taken I thought he would have already been gone before then I'm going to go You've got Aspelicueta Yeah You've got Cole I don't have Cole He's got Cole Oh you've got Cole and Aspelicueta I'm going to go

1:31:40I'm going to go Clichy He was well good I'm going to go Desailly Clichy was class Oh my team's so good This team wins the league by far No, no mind's meant like. You're playing 4-4-9. I've got some good going on now. So, these are your last two picks? Yeah. Has anyone said Cucurella? No. I'll go Cucurella. Oh, I just need a goalie now. Wait, do I get a second? Yeah. Yeah, this is your last pick. And I need a centre mark. Oh, fuck it.

1:32:17I will go... Colo Torre.

1:32:24What position are you looking for? Just a goalie It's either Chesney or Kudicini Rabianski What? Royer's gone Everyone's gone Don't give him clues I don't know Seaman I suppose There's also another one as well Do you think you're going to chew Kudicini? My team is so top heavy, it's crazy. Yeah, I'll go Seaman. Kudu Cini over David Seaman. Kudu Cini was class. Not David Seaman. What about Jens Lehman? Even Lehman, yeah. Nah, I don't know. Not him. Not him. I'd rather have Kudu Cini than Lehman. That's mental. I'll go Jungberg. Terrible pick. Is he? Right, I'm finishing my team off now with the perfect glue.

1:33:15That brings it all together. Bruno G? Yeah, okay. I haven't played two games. No, honestly, like my team, when you hear it, it's going to make sense. All right, well done, then. Let's sponge the roux in order of our 11. Yeah, Jabot and Silva. In positional order. Right, I've got Seaman, Aspilicuetas, Saliba, Desoye, Ashley Cottle, Essien Lampard, Zola, Parma, Van Persie, Overmars. Parma on the right? very good team not that good Raya in goal back four of Rhys James Carvalho Coletor and Cucurello midfield four of Saka Fabregas Vieira and Sanchez and then a front two of Henri and Burkham oh 4-4-2 yeah stinker Sanchez wide of a fourth okay you can get overran on that left hand so okay so heat me out here so we've got Cotua and goal right got the back three Sol Campbell Gabriel Thiago Silva but oh no how are we going to cover the wings don't worry we've got Kant here and Kite Sado What, a wing back?

1:34:20No, no, no, no. Kante, I said a wing back. The hardest working, you know, most... That's actually quite small. Yeah, they can easily, they're going to sit in this area and they're going to cover, they pick up that space because they have that about them. And who's going to cover the midfield? Yeah, who's going to do that? Who's the workhorse who's going to bring in Hazard and Robin on the wings? It's Bruno G. It's Bruno G who can come deep and collect the ball and has been proven to be able to ball carry and distribute to these playmakers. Who are you holding midfielders? Kante and Kaisel. and then you've got Bruno G Bruno G he's going to take it off them no no he's going to pivot between 8 and 10 he's going to he's letting his forwards do the work yeah and then by the way because I'm telling Hazard and I'm telling Robin I'm like you boys you stay right there oh you're playing a 3-2-1 you stay right there 3-2-3-1 no he's playing like a 3-3-4 no 3-2-3-1 I've got no I've basically got a 3-3-4 3 3-3-4 3-3-2-2 so you've got Hazard and Robin on the win yeah but look can I see it on Kanté can cover this Bruno collects it.

1:35:15It's like a 3-2-1-4. Yeah. He's going to dish it out to Hazard and Robin. That's good. By the way, they have Hazard, free reign, come inside, do whatever you want and Costa up there be in the big shit house, finish it all up. Do you have Hasselbank as well? I'm Hasselbank, yeah, two up front, sorry, yeah. Two up front. Yeah, we've got Hasselbank. Two up front with Robin and Hazard. No, no, so I'm a 3-2-1-4. I'm a 3-2-2-2. No. Yes. No, because Bruno's in a one. Yeah. Yeah. 3-2-1 3-2-3-2 It's a 3-2-1 It's a 3-2-3-2 It's a 3-2-3-2 It's a 3-2-3-2 Yeah 3-2-3-2 It's not that 3-2-1 Actually I think that could work Can I stay it on Kantic And cover up that space And Bruno G can drop in anyways That is a mental formation And whenever in doubt You just smash it out of Hazard Yeah Or Robin Yeah I think that's a good team Yeah nice It's good to get goals Checking goal back four of Loren Terry Adams Clichy midfield what's so funny Clichy he was good he's shit what do you mean he's good he's renowned for being shit he wasn't yes he is he was alright in the grand scheme of a draft Chelsea-Arsenal in terms of left backs yeah that's why you have to go three in the back bro if you don't get actually caught okay Rice, McAlealy, Ozil front three Jumbo, Drogba, Perez it's actually the worst team no way probably is the worst team not a chunk Bryce, McAlelly, Ozil that's class Will Ozil give me soon?

1:36:47Well Palmer will be injured Compared to everyone's attackers those are the worst attackers Drogba's better than Diego Costa I disagree What? I disagree Costa's getting more goals By the way I've got Costa and Hasselbang Drogba's better than both of them Yeah Drogba's I've got both Drogba's better than both of them Put them together though It's not fucking Power Rangers mate I've got Hazard and Robben Yeah, they're class. Yeah, that's a good two selections. Hewreyes? Shit. You think Perez was shit? Compared to Hazard and Robin, yeah. Right, let us know who you think got the best team anyway. Let me quickly.

1:37:22Any players we're missing? Yeah, anybody you wanted that had gone? Nah. I thought about Balak and stuff like that. Deco? Nah, I think all the ones. Who are you on about big names who didn't get mentioned? Cech. Yeah, I thought Cech would have went up earlier. The keeper's the easiest one to pick. a lot of good minds about the goalie I was like I'm not going to waste there was three good goalies and then there's just one shit who did you have in goal? Seaman yeah shit shit you're playing the formation that doesn't exist yeah yeah well I'm doing what Jabby Alonso does really? does he play that way?

1:37:57yeah good lad still a good idea it was a good team right then you've got good individual players I don't think it's a good team I think Kante and Kaysido could do what I ask that's a good little They could do what I'm asking of them. Yeah, when I got to like, when I needed a wing guy, Malouda, but no, I won't ever. Didn't fill me with. Joe Cole. Joe Cole was one actually I nearly went with. But I wanted pace with Overmars. Yeah. Cole and Palmer, it's just too slow. Yeah. Bit too turkey. And Overmars was like a whippet. Well guys, let us know, do a draft with yourself and let us know your team.

1:38:29Anelka could have been picked. Solved a turkey million. Yeah, works for both. For both teams. Yeah, yeah. And Willian. Yeah, Willian. Wiltord. Oh my God. You didn't pick Ali Adier. Sterling. Played for both. Willian. David Luiz. David Luiz. Quincy Owusu-Bey. Yeah. Franny Jeffers. David Bentley, friend of the show. David Bentley. Sidwell. Yes. Number nine, wasn't he? Don't. Buddy. He'd come through at Arsenal as well, I think. Yeah. Well, anyway, let us know what you think about those teams and why Lewis is mental and why Theo's his shit. And drop your predictions for what the score's going to be this weekend for the Arsenal Chelsea game.

1:39:04Your predictions. 2-1 Arsenal. 3-2 Arsenal. 1-0 Arsenal Could be I'm going to go 2-1 Arsenal as well Nah fuck that 2-1 Chelsea Covering all bases again Yeah Oh classic Alright bye Bye everyone