In short
Aston and Sarah Merrygold (JLS) discuss their relationship and family life, parenting routines with four kids, their fitness/healthy-snack habits, and JLS’s upcoming tour (including two O2 shows and a 21st sold-out show). They also talk about social media/TikTok dancing, movie-night swearing moments, and a listener’s “wrong name in bed” story. A major segment covers the origin and purpose of JLS condoms (“Love Safe”) created with Durex, including Aston’s mum’s role and the taboo-breaking rationale.
Guests
Aston Merrygold (JLS singer/dancer; toured and choreographed; tour rehearsals; O2/arena shows). Sarah Merrygold (his wife; choreographer/dancer; makes healthy snacks; TikTok content partner).
Key claims/examples
They met while both were touring; they keep kids close together (7 and 5, plus a 19-month-old mentioned). Aston says the condom idea came from his mum, a social worker working with young mums; they aimed to reduce teen pregnancies/STIs. Example: a drunken hookup where a man calls the narrator “Katie” (his ex) and later claims it’s his sister’s name.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOInitial Impressions and Parenting Tales
0:00 to 0:22
Discussion about Aston and Sarah's parenting experiences and their well-being.
“Pandora jewelry brings the sparkle to your summer.”
Initial Impressions and Parenting Tales
2:09 to 3:44
Discussion about Aston and Sarah's parenting experiences and their well-being.
“Jingo Babadoo babadoo babadoo Ba Jingo Hello, you're listening to Shag Married Annoyed.”
Life with Kids: Challenges and Humor
3:44 to 5:09
A light-hearted conversation about the chaos of raising kids.
“We're just excited because it's nice to talk to other people.”
Navigating Family Life with Multiple Children
5:09 to 7:15
Discussing the dynamics and challenges of having children close in age.
“Like, you know, it's one of them, like...”
Soft Play Adventures and Parenting Realities
7:15 to 8:43
Sharing experiences of soft play and parenting challenges.
“And we have separate weekends and we have to do everything differently.”
Soft Play Adventures and Parenting Realities
9:08 to 9:25
Sharing experiences of soft play and parenting challenges.
“It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks.”
Returning to Touring: JLS's Comeback
9:55 to 12:55
Conversation about JLS's upcoming tour and its implications for family life.
“Like you have a quick thought and go, oh, that would make quite a good little video, a little clip and just throw them out.”
Love Story: How Aston and Sarah Met
12:55 to 14:01
Aston and Sarah share the story of their relationship's beginnings.
“Like you're not mad that he's going on to her because you used to do that as a living.”
Condoms and Collaboration
14:01 to 15:32
Exploration of GLS condoms and their origin in charity collaboration.
“Somebody's sent in saying that they used GLS condoms.”
Ex Relationships and Communication
15:33 to 18:15
Discussion on how couples handle past relationships and communication.
“He's turned it around from his mum's idea about checking.”
Show all 19 chapters
Navigating Parenthood and Humor
18:16 to 20:58
Humorous tales about parenting, swearing children, and awkward moments.
“I don't think, yeah, we never kind of got, like, deep dive into, like, past.”
The Challenges of Homework
20:59 to 23:18
Sharing experiences and frustrations regarding children's homework.
“I really like, I don't want to sound weird.”
Anonymous Story Reading
23:19 to 28:00
Reading and discussing an anonymous listener's relationship story.
“It does get aggressively smaller as you get older, doesn't it?”
Introduction to an Anonymous Story
28:00 to 28:38
The hosts set the stage for an anonymous listener's story with intriguing details.
“Well, just to make me fucking point, lad.”
A Night of Regrets
28:38 to 30:05
The listener recounts a drunken night with a guy who mistakenly calls her by his ex's name.
“At some point during the night, I realised he was calling me by his ex's name, Katie.”
Humor in Awkward Situations
30:05 to 31:04
The hosts dissect the humorous and awkward implications of calling a partner by the wrong name.
“Although, my brother calls me Zoe all the time.”
Touring with Aston Merrygold
31:04 to 32:04
Aston shares exciting details about his upcoming tour and achievements.
“This could be the first episode he ever hears then.”
Reflections on Success
32:04 to 32:54
The hosts reflect on their careers and their children's talents, discussing the nature of success.
Throwback to Lip Sync Battle
32:54 to 34:22
The hosts reminisce about a past collaboration on a TV show, sharing funny anecdotes.
“Nah Lip sync battle Oh my god yes Holy shit You blanked it out I definitely I did actually Him in his pants Do you love that?”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:01Pandora jewelry brings the sparkle to your summer. Now with even better prices. Enjoy up to 50 % off select styles. From personalized pieces to must-have favorites made for the summer. Timeless designs that shine with you through every moment, wherever the summer takes you. Shop in-store or online. Now through July 6th. Terms and conditions apply. Visit Pandora.net for details. Study and play. Come together on a Windows 11 PC. And for a limited time, college students get the best of both worlds. Get the Unreal College Deal. Everything you need to study and play with select Windows 11 PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft 365 Premium and a year of Xbox Game Pass Ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller.
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0:56Rosie Ramsey:Hello, you're listening to Shagmire Denoid. Please keep me anonymous and I sound like a pirate. That was, yeah. Hello. Fuck up and there. On this week's episode, we have got Aston and Sarah Merigold. Obviously Aston of GLS fame and his lovely wife, Sarah. And they came in. Wow, lovely chat. We had a really, really nice chat. It was really, it was just really interesting, you know, because I feel like I've watched Aston over the years on loads of stuff. I'd never actually met him and I'd never met Sarah. And yeah, it was just lovely talking to them. They brought their little girl with them. I mean, I think we do talk about it in the episode, but they looked so fucking fit and well for having a young baby with them.
1:32I was well upset.
1:33Rosie Ramsey:They are. Well, they're fit people, aren't they? Ah, yeah. They're dancers. They're something I just thought who good looking is well upset. And then I've followed her on Instagram since and she made this healthy snack out of dates and nuts and dog chocolate. And I was like, that's why you look nice. Good skin, regular poos. Well done her. We'll talk about how they met. Obviously, we're talking about their lovely family. We're talking about what they're doing now. GLS are going back on tour. We're talking about that. And don't worry, everyone. We ask about GLS condoms. How could we not? It's a very large part of the conversation.
2:05Enjoy.
2:08Rosie Ramsey:We had a fight about the jingle. We couldn't settle on a jingle. So this is the jingle. We hope you like the jingle. Jingo Babadoo babadoo babadoo Ba Jingo Hello, you're listening to Shag Married Annoyed. Please keep me anonymous with me, Rosie Ramsey and my husband, Christopher Ramsey. Yes, hello. And we are joined by, at time of record, our first couple that we've interviewed so far. And please keep me anonymous. It is. Very exciting. It is Aston and Sarah Merrigold. Yay! Welcome, welcome, welcome. Thanks for having us. Thank you so much. Very pretty couple. Thank you. Very gorgeous. Well, do you know what it is, right?
2:53Do you know what it is? Let's let everyone behind the camera here. Let's let everyone behind the scenes. We were just getting ready there. We'll do a few of these a day. We've got the interviews. And you guys came in with your 19-month-old baby, looking fresher than I think we've ever been anywhere with any of our children. You rolled in with a child, smelling amazing, looking fresh and chilled and just with it. and honestly, from the bottom of my heart, fuck your balls. You just might have made an effort for you. It was unbelievable. I did wake up looking like this. It was unbelievable. Someone came to me and went, oh my God, they brought their baby with them.
3:32I went, but I can't hear screaming and shouting. They can't have brought their baby with them because they're not trying to kill each other and their baby's not crying. They can't be a baby here. Yeah, you had the two boys here and that would be very, very good. Right, so it's chaos.
3:43Rosie Ramsey:We have got two boys. So we get the... We have never brought any of our children to work with us ever which is such a shame no no once we took Robin we took Robin our management's office once Avalon and he screamed the place down he hated it he wouldn't he was a nightmare yes you've blanked it out yeah we took him in it was like oh take him around and meet everyone he was screaming shouting we were letting him on the floor he was rolling about crawling horror he hated every second of it and we left mixing it up I think I took him I used to work at Capital in the North East I took him there and he was awful yeah yeah yeah you had to come and get him yeah yeah anyway so we don't it all good anyway congratulations thank you happy for you yeah good she's out there not making any noise whatsoever no bother obviously doing better than us we did something wrong why did you never take us to work um because you are a little fucking country and you couldn't come oh i'll be personally no bother our beat person is going to be beeping like I was going to say, yeah.
4:43We'll stop. We'll last night. God, it's so fun. It's lovely to have you both here.
4:47Rosie Ramsey:Thank you for having us. We're just excited because it's nice to talk to other people. For people who might not know, how long have you guys been together? 13. You had to think about that. 13 years. 13 years. I always love to see the fear in a man's eyes when that happens. No, I was fine at that. Yeah, you seemed all right, though, but you just look at her and you go, oh, I'm going to get this right. Riley, I'm here for that. Do you get up in the night? Do you? She does. I just get into her bed now. Oh, man. Yeah. But it's... Easy life. I'm right on the edge. I've got bad back. Like, you know, it's one of them, like...
5:18Yeah. Oh, she knows all too well. Yeah.
5:20Rosie Ramsey:I share a bed with my four-year-old. Do you? Yeah, he's like my boyfriend. It's like... I mean, that's disgusting. It's really weird. No, we get it. We totally... Let's say it here. Do you want to say it here? And, you know, I just got to the point where I was like, I can't be arsed. No. And I'm not sleeping. And you're not sleeping. But when you're in here with me, we sleep all night.
5:41sleeping on my own. Like the other two. You've got the other two up and they just get up and come in. So it's not like. They sense there's space in the bed. Yeah. Yeah. I just. Yeah. We've talked about this loads haven't we? And like they're going to be adults one day and these days are going to be gone. So do it. Like oh my God. Who cares? The thing where they feel comfortable you know you and Ray feels so safe when he's lying in bed with you. So it's like no. And I love it.
6:06Rosie Ramsey:I love waking up and he's like morning. You have a nice dream and I'm like yes. It's just the cutest thing in the world. Because my sister's got two teenage boys now and she said the saddest thing ever and she went, Rosie, one night, they'll just stop coming in. And they'll just be gone. And then they're out all the time, you never see them. And then when they're like 80, 19, they'll accidentally come in thinking it's a toilet and probably piss in your bed. So you've got that to look forward to. So, you know, there is that. Yeah. Oh dear, that's going to be fun. Yeah, that'd be good. How old are your boys?
6:39Seven and five.
6:40Rosie Ramsey:Seven. Gosh, okay. So that's quite a, that's not much in between. Seven, five and 90 months. Yeah. That's intense, but get it done, man. Yeah. Do you know what? I think that was the, not the plan as such, but I think we always kind of went, any of our friends go, oh, you know, we've got our first coming and whatever. We went, don't, don't wait for the next one. Yeah. Just, just get it done. Yeah. Get it done. Two, three, however many you're having, just keep them close together. because then not only is it obviously carnage, but they obviously then kind of grow up with each other and become more friends.
7:13We waited too long.
7:14Rosie Ramsey:We waited five years and it's a nightmare on the weekend. They want to do different things. Oh, really? And we have separate weekends and we have to do everything differently. So I've got two of my best mates. They've got kids exactly the same age as my youngest, right? And we all go to a local soft play on a Saturday. I don't want to shout it out. That's very brave, by the way. Saturday soft plays. Yeah, mate. She goes on rainy days. It's insane. it's even I'm like what one of them gets there first gets the best table at the front right fair I don't want to I don't want to I love the place I don't want to see where it is because I don't want it to get busier who's already busy absolutely sausage sandwiches are unbelievable right in fact I'm thinking about going on Google and giving it bad reviews just so less people come oh that's harsh that's harsh they get shut down don't do that don't do that it's a local business alright anyway so my mates we've all got you know four year olds they go and they play together and we sit there God sometimes we sit there for hours don't we but you were busy on Saturday before we came down to London so I had to take the nine year old with us as well and I went listen mate I went you can take your iPad you can take your headphones I'll get you you know what I'll get you a little muffin and a cup of tea or whatever and you can sit there and I've got a photo from my phone he looks like he's working in a call centre he's got he's literally I swear to God he looks like he's like selling PPI I was like look at the clip of this man and the ladies are working there yeah he's got the headset on Turtle Beach headset and he's got his iPad and he's just chatting with his mates.
8:36And I was like, the women who weren't there, they were like, remember when he was four and he used to come in? I was like, now look at him. He's too big now. Can't win. Oh, he can't. Oh, we can't. I was going to say, will he not just join in? He's not allowed. But he was, do you know what? He was teetering in her. He was teetering. At one point, a yoga ball bounced about, a big yoga ball the player with bounced out and he like grabbed it like that and I was like, you can go in if you want and he went, oh, no. I was like, You want to go in. Me, but he was desperate to go in. Yeah. Awesome.
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9:55Yeah, just as many as you can. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Like you have a quick thought and go, oh, that would make quite a good little video, a little clip and just throw them out.
10:02Rosie Ramsey:Isn't that so funny? Because I put it on Spotify and I did the switch to video to watch the video because I'm more of a watcher. Yeah. Oh, there you go. I think, than a listener. There you go. Something about me. JLS are going back on tour. We are, yes. Oh, my word. Indeed. Very soon. Yeah. Very soon. November. I lose him next week, to be honest. Oh, for rehearsals. Rehearsals. planned that one nice 19 months old what a piece of shit right it's not the first time it's not exactly it's not the first time of course not the first time of course she's fine she's fine she's fine had fun though yeah it's good yeah it's good it's just um I think now there's not so much kind of we're going to rehearsal and it's very chill yeah do you know what I mean there's no pressure because everyone knows the routines you know what you're doing hopefully yeah well not all of us you will granted just saying oh that's full shade to the other three absolutely oh really Yeah, yeah, yeah.
10:53Or do they have to rehearse more than you? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sometimes. Fair enough. Did you ever choreograph these guys?
11:03Rosie Ramsey:Because Sarah, you are a choreographer. Yes. So is that, hang on, I don't know the backstory of you two meeting. Right. Was it, were you a dancer or were you? Yes, I danced with Jealous. A few times. And we toured. Fell in love. What? Of course. On the bus? No, all secret. On the tour bus? Yeah, thought no one knew. We was all being really secretive. of sneaking into each other's bunks and all of that. And we was like, let's just keep it us. We don't know if it's really a thing. Let's just see. We left and everyone was like, six months later anyway, we was like, right, let's go for it. Let's put it out there.
11:34Let's do it. Everyone's like, we all knew. We all knew. You're not that good. So yeah. Which is fine. I'm not that complete. Yeah, fine. It was fine. That was it. We were fine. So sorry, sorry. Can I just, I need a visual here of sneaking into each other's bunks. Are we talking about a tour bus with the little bunk bed? Yeah. look like the curls oh my gosh of course everyone knew
11:57Rosie Ramsey:it's a curtain they're asleep hey we've got to that's not clapping son that's not clapping son are they together? I don't know what's that that curtain's not a free thing they're making pancakes that's what it sounds like I think that's exciting just a cuddle that's pretty cool just a sweaty cuddle just a sweaty cuddle just a sweaty cuddle just off the dancing yeah yeah oh that's nice though no it was good it was um that was a great tour wasn't it it was a great tour I think it was it was a really like great time in life as well do you know what I mean it was a bit like we've kind of both been touring both been working like non-stop and it was very like I don't know like we just actually met at the like timing was everything I think with that I think it was earlier probably wouldn't have worked and wouldn't have happened if it was later, the same thing, do you know what I mean?
12:54So it was just like... It's the right place, right time.
12:55Rosie Ramsey:And you understand each other's worlds. Yeah. Which is really important. There you go. Like you're not mad that he's going on to her because you used to do that as a living. As much as I tried to make you mad when I heard it, I got nothing about it. Yeah, I know, she's like a bit jealous. It's really fun. Yeah, of course. Yeah, there is that, of course. We get to go along and watch and I take all the kids. It'll be fun. Yeah. But we're the same. we we like you understood my job because you'd been a performer and you've done things and it's like you know like some of your mates like some of my mates from home don't understand that i have to miss a wedding or that i can't go to her do you know i mean i've got like five god kids and i've only been to one of the christenings because i'm i've always been busy yeah like but some people don't get that but when you're with someone who gets your job it's like oh i get it yeah yeah you've got to be up you've got to go and dance in wherever yeah swindon literally middle of nowhere We've been last week, middle of nowhere.
13:49Madness.
13:51Rosie Ramsey:I've got a GLS merch question. It's come up on our podcast before. Somebody has sent in a question. Somebody's sent in saying that they used GLS condoms. I do believe it was on a one night stand. On a one night stand. Someone whipped one out on a one night stand. Right. Then we did the deep dive of GLS or condoms. Were you in that merch meeting? or did it? Did someone have power of attorney or did you sign that off? Honestly, this is going to sound wild as well when I say this. The whole thing was my mum's idea. I mean, I didn't even know this. I've got so many jokes. I know. Like, this is a traffic jam.
14:35There's actually a traffic jam in my head. Like, I can't. I can see what's going to happen. Are you going to clip this as well?
14:40Rosie Ramsey:He's going to die. He's going to burst. Yeah, no. No, so my mum basically was a social worker that worked with young mums for years and years and years. And it was very much that point of as soon as getting into the industry, our main demographic would have then been to like 16 to 24. That's the kind of boy band age range, right? So she was like, listen, it's a subject that even the government, they kind of just kind of steer away from. It's a bit like these are in place and we just kind of leave it alone because it's a bit taboo. So because obviously we had a platform of voice, it was a bit like, you know, we're actually not scared.
15:12to talk about, you know, anything to do with, I suppose, sex in general. I mean, it just is what it is. Sexual health, unreached pregnancies to fly out. Everything, everything across the board. So it was a bit like, do you know what? It just made sense in terms of a charity kind of collaboration that we had and with Durex to kind of make this JLS condom come alive. So yeah, it was...
15:32Rosie Ramsey:Okay, he's turned it around. Yeah. He's turned it around from his mum's idea about checking. I'm so glad I didn't do any of them jokes. I know. That would have been horrible. Yeah. Young girls aren't getting pregnant or getting STIs because of his mum. Oh, love that. What a legacy.
15:51Rosie Ramsey:But did they have to have your faces on them? On the package. Just on the books. But apparently some sold better than others. And I hate to tell you that. That's what we found out. You don't have to hate to tell me. I know that for a fact. Were they all the same size? Oh, absolutely. Oh, okay.
16:14the thing that we loved on the podcast when someone wrote it it was just someone whipping one out on a one-night stand just like don't worry love we've got this do you know what it stands for what just love sex just love safe just love safe yeah that is catchy yeah
16:33Rosie Ramsey:No, it's not. That's the kind of gist of it. And I hope that as everyone put one of them on, they would whisper it in the person's ear. It's okay, I've got the GLS condom. So we're going to just love safe. Why are you leaving? Why are you leaving? Please don't leave. Getting hot. Litty wasn't good. Sorry, guys. One more question about the condom. No, I'm moving on. If we don't ask him this question, and I'll tell you this question, Leah, you'll be so upset. It's true. Have you ever used one of the GLS condoms yourself? No, we weren't together, were we? Good answer. Did you know how I was saying?
17:13Rosie Ramsey:Yeah, exactly. It's all right. Wait, what's it? She's like, I know you did. I know. What do you think, sir? No, it's not Chris. No, it's not. No, it's not. What I do. Was it showing my head annoyed, yeah? I'm leaving annoyed.
Read the full transcript
17:30And don't forget, he's going on a tour in a fortnight, the bastard. I know, right? Right, I'm getting hot now. Sorry, I'm so sorry.
17:37Rosie Ramsey:This is a really good learning curve for us, because actually not all couples are like us, Chris. Yeah, we've got friends who don't talk about past at all. I have got a thing where whenever I mention one of my exes, I'll quickly straight away say, God, I miss her, as soon as I see it. No, we don't really talk about her, actually. Not really. We know a little bit, but... We don't go that far. Every time we miss. God, I miss them all. I miss them all so much. I'm kissing them. They're not dead. No. I just miss them all so much. She's laughing. It's fine. I know. There's no point that she'd be. We are weird.
18:12We're the weird ones. That's why we do this. We've always shared. We've always, you know. No, but it's good. I think that's healthy. That's very healthy. I don't think, yeah, we never kind of got, like, deep dive into, like, past. I think we know past. I know one of your exes. She's really nice. Yeah. Talk. Yeah, we do. You talk? Oh, this is good. No. This is good. She's just on Instagram. Oh, that's nice.
18:36Rosie Ramsey:Oh, that's nice. That's healthy, man. It's healthy. I've seen some of mine before and be like, hello. I'm sure there'd be some that I wouldn't talk to. I'm sure there would. Well, we had a whole thing. When we first started the podcast, your thing was when you were furious that when we got married, none of your exes turned up and tried to stop the wedding, weren't you? She'd have loved that. No, I didn't even get an Instagram message. and I'm like not even like she was like I didn't get a text a phone call like you know she wanted them all she wanted them all to turn up at my door in the rain going please think this rethink this she got none not one not a sniff not a sniff I actually I actually think all of them thought that well bastard
19:20Rosie Ramsey:so yeah not a sniff none of that and my friends have always said like slid my DMs like that X and I'm like oh no you don't maybe they're just they're so over infatuated that they can't bring themselves to do it yeah true yeah that used to be really really weird we had a good idea so that they've done you know still pretty weird you know I like that you got me I did I won I'm actually crying laughing here I'm actually crying you guys do quite a lot online together oh yeah yes yes how are you enjoying the world of TikTok it's a lot but yous are really funky and cool and you do the dancing no but you know you are I show Chris some of your dancing videos like it's really good it's sickening it is really good and I think that does really well on TikTok we're like a couple of old people trying to do do you have any idea how many times she's tried to get me to do shit this is the thing I dance Oh, this is the thing, we've got to do this.
20:26Oh, Chris, you've got to lip sync to this and then you've got to do this. Get in there, bin. That is what it is, isn't it?
20:32Rosie Ramsey:I know. Content is king, apparently. Content is king. It is. You've got to do it. And if it fails, they often like the ones more. So it's like, do you know what I mean? Yeah. It ends up, you know. This is very true. Yeah, you kind of film something and be like, yeah, this is great. Can't wait to upload this. It'll be really fun. It'll be really great. Nothing. No numbers. You're like, I thought that was really good. It's weird, isn't it? And then you'll fall over or, you know, camera. No, just put Riley in the video. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's fine. Oh, absolutely. Hundreds of thousands, millions of views.
20:58She takes us viral most of the time. Does she really? Our kids take us viral. We don't do it.
21:01Rosie Ramsey:See, I think. It's not us. No, it's not us. I really like, I don't want to sound weird. I think, I love watching kids online. I think kids are great. I know what you mean. It's not. Just clip it out. Clip it out. No, do you know what I mean? Yeah. Not in a pervy way. In a really lovely way. Like as a mum, I think kids are mint. I love watching them online. They do the funniest thing. They do. They say the funniest stuff. It's brilliant. Like me and my eldest watch a lot of the kid videos. Like, you know, the really silly ones online. Like when they get the babies and they're literally like, who is it?
21:35Rosie Ramsey:Take them back. They're so brilliant. Show me that one. Honestly, our eldest has now started to do the same thing. Like, oh, can I watch that video again? Watch that video again. I think we had that. It wasn't awkward. But you know when your child Like Okay paint the scene We're sitting in the living room It's Friday night Movie night Everything's fine Do you guys do movie night? Yeah We do Friday night We try and set it And make sure we have that kind of Because she can go to bed Then we kind of get both the boys attention All that kind of stuff Nice That's awesome But they were watching the film And we'd watched this film Honestly about Four times in a row So now you're being like I can't I can't do this anymore Yeah So we're just kind of scrolling Just like arm around Yeah Sarah had her phone and this one went, oh, fuck!
22:20In the middle of this movie. So, you know, obviously it's movie night, it's really lovely. Both the boys then just go, look at Sam, like, distraught. And then our oldest, which we've never heard him swear before. Right. Never heard him swear before. He went, oh, my friend said that the other day. He went, oh, you fucking idiot. And just carried on watching the movie and we're like, oh, man. But no, like a lot's just happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like in a really short space of time and then we were like, And I've just gone back to the film. Like nothing happened.
22:50Rosie Ramsey:What did he say? It's like a bullet to the heart. If you hear them swear, it's like... Yeah. But so innocent as well. Like the way he just said it, it wasn't like, yeah, but he just went, yeah, he said fucking idiot the other day. And you're a bit like... Yeah. It's terrifying. It's when they're not your little babies anymore. And it just comes slower. Sorry, it just comes quicker. It sort of drips in and it comes quicker and quicker. And you think, yeah. And you hear them talk to their friends and you're like, ah. It's that. It's the friends. it's the outside world that kind of starts to mould them and they just hear stuff can't shout at them anymore either like at all me or me but never mind it's cute it's cute our son didn't know the wanker sign the other day though did he when someone did it to him so sorry I'll give you I'll give you I need to go sorry
23:35only careful how I say it but another bunch of kids from another school saw the school bus that my son was on and he told us that they were all sticking their fingers up and then he went and then one of them did that and I was like what the heck's that and we were like fuck we know what that is
23:50Rosie Ramsey:well he did but he didn't know what it was he's nine he's nine he's gonna be ten yeah but he didn't know what am I saying yeah he did it a lot bigger than that it was like that he did it like that oh you know everyone does that everyone does that first off the first time oh yeah yeah yeah you're like GLS ones one fitness
24:13Rosie Ramsey:oh my goodness That is it. It does get aggressively smaller as you get older, doesn't it? It's just a shake. It's the aggression. Yeah, the aggression. It's the realism. You only moved your hand. That's what I mean. It's the realism. Exactly. It's just that, baby. I'm a professional love. Can't do it. There you go. I've just given myself cramp in my arm, pretending to do the wanker sign, which is just, what a tragic way to get injured. Oh, my gosh. Oh, it's gone up here now. Oh, God. Oh, right. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. Listen, you guys have got a story to read out. Okay. So this is from a member of the public.
24:52Rosie Ramsey:We have no idea what it is. And we've got an email full of them. Full of Phil. So you're going to do the first part and then... This is a lot of pressure, by the way. Yeah, it's all good, man. You know that? When you get asked to read out at school and you have to stand up and be like... Well, listen, if you make any mistakes, just start again. Can I just say, I would count the paragraphs To see you in English I would go right So I'd know I was like six paragraphs in And I would proofread the paragraph Thought I had to stand up and do it I'm the soust reader in the world You guys don't need to know how to read You can dance You can dance I couldn't speak We have to do the homework Oh my god Seven year old homework my god I had to google something we did I do think I've just forgot how many types of verbs are there do we know adverbial verb I've forgotten in what in what possible world other than if they go on pointless when they're older are they going to need to know that shit exactly I put a full paragraph of my son's homework in a chat GPT the other day and I said tell us what the adverbs are yeah that is a great idea to any of Robin's teachers listening and he did it all by himself.
26:11Actually, I only did that to check the marking because he already did the answer and I went, I'll check for you. If he didn't know I cheated, I went, I was like, yeah, that's right. Yeah. It's horrible. Matt. Yeah. My mate Carl Richardson, who supports me on tour, he was a friend of the podcast. He used to be a maths teacher at GCSE level and I am honestly, he's on speed dial for when the maths homework starts. I swear to God. Could we borrow? Yeah, of course. He's a very reasonable price. Maths is all right. I'm not bad at maths. English is just
26:38Rosie Ramsey:Are your kids quite clever as well? Because our eldest is quite clever Yeah We haven't got long, he's seven No but he's seven but it's year three but he's like the other day he was up in year five and you're kind of going what are we doing? Obviously great, we're doing great but you just kind of go I can't keep up with that No I'm not, you're more academic than me I am absolutely My attention span he had this big paragraph and I was just like staring at it I was like you've got to rewrite all that yeah it's a lot isn't it but then you can't see it to them no I was like yep let's go yeah let's go yeah homework is bullshit though just by the way oh totally I'm sorry not for him when they can't do it themselves it's for us it's homework for us it's not for them I've got to do it we've got time it's ridiculous again run teacher would you pack it in no I don't in all honesty knock it on the head I'm sick of it stop wait Chris would like a meeting with you.
27:41I wouldn't like a meeting. I wouldn't. Stop saying things. The amount of times I want to say it to him, though, it's weird, because he's like, we'll get to the story in a second, but my nine-year-old, he's like me mate, he's like me little best mate. The amount of times I want to go to him, I want to go, listen, mate, none of this fucking matters, man, honestly, I want to go, I got told, I got told, I want to go, I want to go, at the end of my first DVD I released, at the end, I dedicated it to every teacher who told us to stop talking. Now get that on, jump. Yeah, yeah. Dad, why are you smoking in the house?
28:07You don't even smoke. Well, just to make me fucking point, lad. Sorry, carry on. Oh, story. Come on, do me a shit reading. Here we go. Three paragraphs. Okay, wait. Dear Chris and Rosie, please keep me anonymous. When I was 19 slash 20, I was mad about a guy in my friend group. Eventually, one thing led to another, and after a drunken night out, I was back at his house while his parents were away. Foolishly, I had a few extra drinks that I could blame the alcohol for my pre-planned bad decisions. At some point during the night, I realised he was calling me by his ex's name, Katie. It didn't twig at first.
28:46As I was busy in the moment with a guy I'd dreamed of for months, but by the third time he had said it, I realised it wasn't on. So I said, did you just call me by your ex's name? While trying to make it better in his drunken, horned up state, he somehow managed to hit on one of the few statements that could make matters worse. What? No, because I'm proofreading whilst you're reading that and I'm going, that's not real. What do you reckon happened? I don't know. What could make that matter worse? So we see the X. Oh, my God, yeah, let's go on.
29:19Rosie Ramsey:I don't think it'll be that on the nose. Just love safe, Katie. I don't think it's going to matter. Okay, so he just keeps saying Katie. He keeps saying, so what could he possibly say that makes it worse? Does he think she is the ex? I'm confused. You look a lot like her. I just really miss her. Okay. I don't know. Oh, that would be bad, wouldn't it? I just really miss her. I'm sorry. I just really miss her. He's going to cry. He's going to cry? Yeah. What does he say? Okay. Come on, ask him what he said. He said, no, sorry, Katie's my sister's name. Yes, he tried to make it better by saying that he wasn't calling me by his ex's name in bed, but his sister's name.
29:55I don't know how he thought that was better. It was in the middle of the night, so I couldn't be bothered to leave, so I just sulked for a while instead. The following morning, though, the extra drinks came back to haunt me, and I was sick on his parents' carpet. Serves him right. Yeah. Who was sitting on my carpet? Katie.
30:12Rosie Ramsey:You said sturdies. I'm sorry, that's my sister's name. That is great. Although, my brother calls me Zoe all the time. Not when he's off shagging.
30:29Took a whole different time
30:30Rosie Ramsey:Come on That is That's That's Daisy That's one of the worst things he's ever said No it's not That is one of the worst things you've ever said That's nowhere near the worst thing I've ever said That is terrible We're just atrocious people No so my brother sometimes And it really gets on my nerves He's like Oh I see you later Zoe I mean Rosie I mean Zoe And I'm like I mean sister But it's Zoe Rosie Very similar Yeah So I'll let him off But let's hope he doesn't say it in the bedroom. Yes. I'm going to have to ask him. It's very weird. I'm sure he's going to be buzzing when talking about this. I'll never ask him actually.
31:01Rosie Ramsey:Yeah, maybe don't ask him that. This will just stay here. He doesn't listen to it anyway. Fuck you, Kevin. This could be the first episode he ever hears then. This is good, yeah. I won't. Loves you. He'll be all over this. He loves you. I'm so glad Aston Merigold is finally on the bus.
31:20Rosie Ramsey:He'll never listen. He'll never listen. He always goes, oh, one of my friends said it. the podcast is about this funny thing. And I'm like, did you listen? He's like, no. You don't like, this sounds like, that is such a bang on impression. It's actually frightening how good that impression is of our brother. It sounds exactly like that. It sounds exactly like that. Where's the tour going just before you go? Tell me where the tour's going. The tour is everywhere. Yeah. All the arena. Yeah. All the big arenas of the UK, which is great. And we're actually doing, or I say doing, we're actually joining the 21 club at the O2.
31:54so we've done the oh we've got two of the O2 yeah we've got two O2s this tour but the first one will be our 21st sold out show that's epic
32:06Rosie Ramsey:that's amazing congrats that is so cool we could do that we've only got 20 to do just join it she's got 20 nearly there no that's really cool we were chatting to Leanne yes of Little Mixed Fame earlier on and we're just saying like she only just recently sort of looked back on the success because when you're in it you don't but like what that is such an achievement that's amazing yeah it's nuts congratulations it is wild but then you just you know i think we said this yesterday didn't we just be like it's it's not that it's not a thing because it is incredible but now it's like we see our kids start to show like little sparks of stuff and you're kind of going oh my god like you're yeah well you just go you're so much better than i was at that age so you could this could just be really easy for you all the GLS have got kids similar ages oh my god they could be like a little S Club juniors they could they're all very you know wanting to be front and centre so I'm not sure how that would go can't all be Aston guys I don't know what you think this is do back do back now can't do back fucking go you're out get in the back get out of here I'll take it well genuinely two absolutely wonderful people thank you for talking it's been really enjoyable and sorry we've been massively inappropriate ooh to be more inappropriate just before we go last time can you remember the last time we worked together can you remember what it was come on come on last time we worked together just me and you he's blanked it out come on he might have blanked it out I definitely have blanked it out I reckon a show of some sort is it a show it was a show it was a TV show Yeah Yeah What was it strictly?
33:52Nah Lip sync battle Oh my god yes Holy shit You blanked it out I definitely I did actually Him in his pants Do you love that? Sexy back Yeah I remember Oh yeah Well Chris took his job off Yeah We're going to watch it on the way home now You know that Well you're definitely not going to because I tell you why they'll never show it again because what did I do I did Remixed to Ignition by R. Kelly Yes Thanks for watching everyone That shit will never see the light of day ever again. I'll never do better. He did two P. Diddy songs. You didn't. J. T. J. T. P. Diddy. What did I do? J. T. I did Madonna.
34:32I did Madonna. But you had a shirt on. No, that was Madonna then. I didn't have much of sexy pants on. Yeah, pants, yeah. It was good. Good fun. They'll never show it again. But it was fun. Nice to see you again. I love that.
34:45Rosie Ramsey:Thanks, guys. I think Riley's ready for a cuddle. She's looking. Oh, no, she's okay. We're coming. She's alright. They're coming. Thank you so much. Thank you guys. Thanks.
From the publisher
This week, the Ramseys are joined by pop royalty and parenting pros, Aston & Sarah Merrygold. The couple discuss the highs and lows of soft play, the joys of touring and how Sarah and Aston met!
And of course, Chris and Rosie ask Aston about the legendary JLS condoms! All of this plus a brilliant PKMA...
Find details to the JLS tour at jlsofficial.com
Send in your weird and wonderful stories to shaggedmarriedannoyed.com
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