Please Keep Me Anonymous with Mollie King and Matt Edmondson

0:00This episode is brought to you by Welch's Fruit Snacks. Big news for your kids' lunchbox. Welch's Fruit Snacks are now made without any artificial dyes. A snack parents can feel good about and the same delicious taste kids can't get enough of. All made with no artificial dyes. Try Welch's Fruit Snacks today. Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney+. Let's go! Get ready for a new case. We're the greatest partners of all time! New friends. Gary the Snake. And your last name? Death Snake Dream Team New Habitats Zootopia has a secret reptile population You can watch the record-breaking phenomenon at home Zootopia 2 Now available on Disney Plus rated PG Right now you can get Disney Plus and Hulu For just$4.99 a month for three months With a special limited time offer Ends March 24th After three months plan auto-renews And$12.99 a month terms apply Hello you are listening and watching Shag Marinoid Please keep me anonymous Yes and on this episode We have the hilariously funny and lovely Matt Edmondson and Molly King and we it's the first time I've met Molly it's the first time I've met both of them yeah and they're genuinely lovely people hilarious as well you know and you can tell people are like genuinely really nice not fake not just nice well I've known Matt for quite a while but I haven't seen him for ages so it was lovely to see him lovely to chat with them both and I know you know the intro to this podcast please keep an anonymous is sponsored by the word lovely it is literally all we ever say but we're just lucky to have really genuinely nice people on so far it's been good Molly and Matt are on promoting their new podcast Novel Idea which is a crime podcast where they basically write a novel a chapter each and they'll explain it totally in the show but honestly the way they explain it I'm going to listen it sounds great and we get on to a little bit more about what they both enjoy and they're very different people so the chapters of the podcast and book are going to be very different really nice really good idea and disclaimer at one point we tell them about a film we love and none of us can think of the name of the film.

1:59I quickly Googled it afterwards. It's called Coherence, just so you know. It might be rubbish, though, because we watched it on a plane. It might be. We did watch it on a plane. It might be rubbish. Rate and subscribe. If you're on YouTube, please subscribe. And yeah, enjoy. We had a fight about the jingle. We couldn't settle on a jingle. So this is the jingle. We hope you like the jingle.

2:30Joel Domit, apparently, when he came in, he just had his varicose veins. Because you were taking painkillers. And when he came in, he was on painkillers. Because he just had his varicose veins out. And then I learned that that was a thing. Oh, God. I keep imagining it. I'm sorry, I'm on these painkillers. I pulled my neck. Oh, my gosh. How did you do that? I don't even know. I don't even know. I think I slept funny. That's the most annoying thing. It's the worst. It's so irritating. I've seen two physios. They don't know what to do with me. So on Sunday, I had to go to A &E, and I was like, I just need anything that's going to take this pain away.

3:04Oh, bless you so much. My God, what if I sound a bit weird on this part? No, it's absolutely fine. That would be the real me. Oh, bless you, though. That's awful, isn't it? Sorry about that. I hear that we're just getting to that age, though. We're getting to that age where things start to break. Things start going weird. It's really irritating when you sleep wrong, though. Oh, I know. Your body goes, sorry you didn't do that properly. I'm going to be, yeah. Yeah, and I'm like, I was sleeping. How has anything happened? I'd love a dramatic story to be able to tell for the injury. It's really irritating.

3:35It's not really irritating. Do you want me to hook you up? I know you'll see Nick, aren't you, on Thursday. I'll see Nick, yeah. Anyone who has ever had physio always thinks their physio is the best physio, and I think my physio is the best physio. I need to see your man. You need to see him. He's fantastic. Do you want to have a physio off? Yeah, he's great. Oh, God. He's called David Harris. I do believe my physio will beat your physio. No, no. No, mine is like... Let's see. Let them keep digging, come on. Mine is, why are you the physio? No, I'm not the physio. I was going to say, you're the physio.

4:03No, I am not the physio. Can you get on my back, please? Oh, my God. I'm not the physio. She just stands on me back. She just jumps up and down on me back like a toddler. I'm not the physio. My physio, he's the goat, honestly. You go to him and he's just like, oh, yeah, it's exactly this. He points it out to you on like a diagram. Oh, does he? Yeah. He always does like a, it's like, what's the scan you have when you're having a baby? A son of a grass. He does all that. And then he does his manipulations. And then you come out and you feel healed. And then he gives you some exercises that I never do.

4:35Yeah. I feel like no one ever does the exercises. But yeah, I need someone to go, that's where it's hurting. And here's an elbow. It's time to go see them. Tell me about your physio. England first team physio. I mean, sounds like that. probably decent probably decent and it's such a weird link it's her friend's husband went to uni with him and I got him through nothing to do with me doing anything I do I got him through literally a guy who lives in Hartlepool oh my god that's great also you're ridiculous though because you did Strictly and kept in touch with the physio and he came to our house like all the time yeah that was the Strictly physio I was like this is so weird then I found the England one and then I dropped him like a Yeah, you've got to do it.

5:19Popatino. Blocked him. Ghosted him. Where do you go from there? It's like the Brazilian football team. Who's doing the physio for those guys? I need Argentina and Brazil and then I've got the full set. That's right. Collecting first team physios like panini stickers. I don't know. What were you having done? What's wrong? What do you need physio on? So I do Brazilian jiu-jitsu a bit and I'm too old to do Brazilian jiu-jitsu. And you do need a Brazilian one. I do need a Brazilian one. Not as much now, but when you first start, you think, I'm strong. and you just hurt yourself. But now I'm very calm with it now and I don't hurt myself as much.

5:51How are you doing that? That is good. A couple of times a week when I can. Oh my God. But it's me body goes, stop this. What's your makeup lady called? Claire, would you like her? What do you want? Can I just ask her to check I'm not looking shiny on the monitor? Can Claire quickly check shine? See, I like a bit of shiny. Do you? I don't know. It makes us feel like youthful. Youthful. When you're glowing. There's a fine line between shine and sweat though, isn't there? Thank you so much. I'm trying to teach Matt the difference between sweaty and that youthful shine. And glowing, yeah. The glowing.

6:21I don't think he's got there yet. It's a gold smell. Do you wear makeup for telly? Well, I'm not wearing any now, but if I were on telly, then yes. Yeah. Not a lot, really. You have to drag Chris to the makeup chair. Like, literally. Basically, if I've got a little red mark or something, I'll just have them do that. And they like putting powder on so you don't shine. So you don't shine, yeah. But otherwise, no. I mean, my first ever job was on kids' TV, and there was a woman and she'd done this some course where they have you ever had it where they got like an airbrush literally like a spray oh they used to do that didn't they yeah that was a phase and she was bang into trying it out but she didn't know what she was doing and honestly it was like an inch thick of foundation every day oh right was she trying to tell you something I never understood that I just created a sort of offence yeah yeah yeah it was horrendous oh my god and you get to the end and they give you a wipe and you sort of try and wipe it off and it would be like you'd create a chasm in it full Mrs Doubtfire the first telly I ever did was some TV show on Channel 5 a little chat show on Channel 5 Ian Wright hosted it and they did that to me then and they put the spray on us I remember watching it back it was the first thing ever I watched it back at home and at one point I touched my face and it looked like a ghost was touching my face it looked like a ghost's hand had come from under the table to touch my face It was unbelievable.

7:45I should tan your hands on her. I saw Claire who does our makeup. I wouldn't let her put too much on her face because then she has to tan me hands and I don't like it on me hands because it smells like biscuits. The hands are always the giveaway, aren't they? When you hold them up, it's like, oh, there's the real me. Yeah, the Donald Trump effect. The real me. I've seen makeup artists apply foundation to your legs. Yeah. You're the only person I've ever met that I've seen that has makeup artists on their legs. Well, yeah, because if they're out and I haven't been bothered to fake tan, And I think, do you know what?

8:14These are a bit ghostly. Yeah. Which they often are. Never sunbathing anymore. Then we might put a bit of foundation down there. Oh, yeah, we don't see the sun anymore. Oh, hiding from it. To the point where our friends are having a baby, right? And we're going to a wedding. And the baby, they're like humming and harming about weather to come, aren't they? Yeah. And the baby's going to only be six weeks. And I said to my friend Shannon, I went, Shannon, I don't sit in the sun. I will sit in the shade with that baby. You can go back to bed. Like, I don't do the sun anymore at all. No, me neither.

8:40Nah. I want to see it, but from probably inside. Yeah, I want to feel it for just secondary, like through the shade. Totally. But it means that I'm quite ghostly. But then she's always sat next to me, so it's fine. So then I suddenly get really sun-pressed. I used to say about makeup, when I first started doing tennis stuff and put makeup on, you catch yourself on the camera and you go, oh God, I look young, I look vibrant, this is amazing. And then going in the dressing room afterwards, wiping it off, it's like getting really ill really quick. Yeah. It's like you apply a hangover to your skin.

9:13Yeah, totally. Do you know what I mean? You're just like blotchy and that again and you're like, oh my God, I'm back to reality. And people see you in public and go, oh God. I fully think men should embrace makeup more though. I really do. I really, really do. He's aged well, don't get me wrong. I think men, for some reason in this world, look better than women aging. But you could do with a bit of makeup. You definitely look better with makeup on. Yeah, okay. I live in South Shields, Rosie. I can't keep putting makeup on in real life. You do what you want. I'd kick the shit in Sainsbury's. Someone will jump on us, man.

9:42What would you have him do? Just a bit of concealer. Just a bit of like under eye. Your skin's so good, Craig. I've got makeup on now, man. Oh, right, okay. That's why, that's why. I was going to say, I agree with you. Sorry, I'll take it all back. He's only just started the last, how long? Three years? He's only started using like cream, like moisturiser. Well, I washed me face in the hotel last night before bed and put moisturiser on and then came through and wanted to pat on the back of Rosie. I was like, I've washed my face and put moisturiser on. Yeah, I know, doesn't it? Never, ever, ever.

10:09Really? You haven't aged since the day I met you. You know that, don't you? Well, thank you very much. Yeah. It's because I also never go in the sunshine. Right. I don't drink. Yeah. And I sleep. Are you trying to say alcohol causes aging? I think it does. I won't have a bad word to say against something. It's a conspiracy. You all don't want me to have a good time. I feel fine after two bottles of wine, actually. My day is not ruined at all. I can get through my Saturday with them kids. It's extremely healthy to piss the bed. It's so healthy. What's your problem? Do you know the damage that it does to your knees getting up and going to the toilet in the middle of the night?

10:51We're like the opposite of self-care, which is really not good. We'll go through stages. That's the thing, though. We'll go really, really well. But then when we are having a drink or having a night, we go hard or go home on both sides, in my opinion. We'll sauna, we'll gin, water. electrolytes all that and then when it's a night off it's like you know I'm going to dip this curry in a pizza yeah it's balanced it's all balanced totally you're doing so well Molly for having a bad neck thanks so much the fact that you came in and popped pills here and then you got a bad neck don't start rumors there's nothing worse no but there's not so obviously I'm on tour at the minute and a different pillow every night in a hotel oh no you're not taking yours with you that's just you look like such a don't you travel with your own pillow travel with your own pillow I've got enough.

11:37Do you have any idea how much shit I travel with? Go on. There's all makeup in a bag of foundation. A team of 12 makeup artists carrying all my stuff. All your videos, yeah. I've got a maid on hand to change the bed sheets that I've got. Of course, yeah. All the plastic sheets. Yeah, the plastic sheets, yeah. That's what I've got. Xbox. Xbox. Well, I was going to leave the Xbox to last, but I've got Xbox. I've got a monitor for the Xbox. I've got my hold all with my stuff in while I'm going to go to the venue that day on. I've got my case with all my other stuff. gym stuff, jiu-jitsu stuff, golf clubs.

12:09Wow, gosh, you are travelling a lot. Spike mat. He's on his adult days. How much time off is he going? Exactly, he's on his adult days. Spike mat, what's that? You're just like an acupressure mat. You've seen them. Well, like a bed of nails. Exactly like a bed of nails. Right. Unbelievable. Exactly a bed of nails. He's an anxious bear. He's a bit of an anxious bear child. When you get off stage, you're absolutely buzzing, right? Yeah. And then, obviously, you have a couple of drinks and you're chilling in the hotel and you wind down a bit, but it's still kind of there in you and then sometimes three, four, sometimes six in the morning, it's really bad if it happens at like seven.

12:39That adrenaline, it's been sitting somewhere and it hits you again and the cortisol's up and it hits you and you wake up and you're like buzzing off the gig but you're like, oh my God, I didn't get to bed until one. I can't be up at seven. So if I go to sleep on that mat or if I lie in bed on that mat, it takes all of the... Oh, you're putting in bed. I lie in bed. Sometimes I fall asleep on it and I wake up an hour later and I'm very upset. Is it actually quite painful? When you first get on it, it's really painful. You get used to it You should not be sleeping on that. I thought you just did it for 10 minutes.

13:05Yeah, I thought you were going to be sleeping. I do for 10 minutes, but then I sometimes fall asleep. I'm not lying on a hotel floor. Are you joking? I don't touch hotel carpet. True. Oh, God, no. And does it catch the piss?

13:18That's the real reason he's joking, yeah. It's like a little tray. No, Chris has never pissed the bed. A sauna blanket, a sauna suit. I'm going to take the sauna suit next week as well. A sauna suit? So it's like a sleeping bag, and you climb in it. and it's a sauna. Your head as well or just up the neck? No, just up the neck with your little chin. Do you know not about these things? No. That's amazing. Like a microscope hazmat. It's like a really heavy sleeping bag. Right. A couple of liquid, right, which is obviously a lot less than an actual sauna and you just zip it up, you get in, you've got to have clothes on in it otherwise you will burn yourself.

13:52Okay. But on tour I do towels so I just do a towel on top of it, lying on towel and then a towel on top of it so it's not touching my skin. 35 minutes. How is it? How's it warming up? It's like infrared. Yeah, it's electric. It's plugged in. You sweat, you drip. What's the benefit of it? Sweating out the infrared. It's really good for you. Just sweat everything out. Good for your bones. It's crazy. God, we need to come on tour with Chris. Guys, what the fuck? And you're pissing it, and the piss immediately gets up for you. I thought you'd be well in all of this stuff. You've got really good stuff.

14:25No. Pop star, yeah. None of that. None of this. This is wild. One of the worst things I ever did was, have you ever done an isolation tank? No, I don't believe I could be with my own thoughts. Yeah, it's like a coffin full of water and it's the temperature of your body and it's got salt in it, so you float. So the idea is that it deprives you of all of your sensory input. So it just feels like you're floating there and they close it and there's just sort of faint light on the ceiling, which is about here. I've seen them before. And you're meant to be in there for an hour. And a friend of mine, this is before I knew I had ADHD, a friend of mine said, I wish I'd go and do one.

15:08And I went in and I was there for about 45 seconds. I thought, what am I going to do for an hour? But to be left alone in a coffin with my own thoughts for an hour, horrendous. That's torture. I'll be lying there. You know, Godzilla, Eminem, fill them with the venom and aluminum. Fill them with the venom and aluminum. I don't like silence. I can't deal with it. Do you like silence? I hate it. I hate it. Even when I treat myself to a massage, you know how they've got the lovely spa music? I don't want it. I want an episode of Friends or an episode of a podcast running so I don't have to think about my own thoughts.

15:41Otherwise, I'm just lying there thinking, got to do that, got to do that. Oh, did that go okay? Oh, I shouldn't have done that. Actually, I just want to hear nonsense. I start counting their strokes. And I'm like, I am insane. You've never got out with double digits. I was going to say, what's your pee? You've never got out with single fingers. You've never got out with single fingers. Yeah, we never got up to double digits. One day. No, I'm the same. I think about everything else. I can't switch off. The stroke was just such a terrible word to use. You left, that was an open goal. You know, the stroke, yeah, I'm like, one.

16:11So I get obsessed. I don't know if I've told you this. I get obsessed with the symmetry of it. Oh, yeah. They haven't done long enough. Yeah, so they'll do the one side of the leg and then they do the same. I go, oh my God, they didn't do the same on that one. It's never as long as it. I'm going to be walking around in circles this afternoon. They've broke us.

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17:47Guaranteed at no extra cost. Exclusively at the UPS Store U.S. retail locations. Send Easter joy on time at the UPS Store. Visit the upsstore.com slash airguaranteed for full details. Terms and conditions apply. here's another thing because my sister used to be a reflexologist and she used to tell me how much it hurt her hands so when i'm getting a massage i'm thinking are they in pain like genuinely i'm like are they are they am i the last one of the deep somebody once said to me if you're going to have a massage only go in the morning because they'll be tired in the evening i thought yeah i don't want to be putting them through pain massaging my back i always i like firm pressure and massage it's my favorite thing if i was like rich beyond my wildest dreams yeah And I could change anything about my life.

18:28I'd have a masseuse. A live-in masseuse. Like Simon Cowell used to have one. I think Reza used to tour with one, if I remember rightly. Incredible. So good, right? Imagine. But I like the pressure to be so, so hard that it causes me physical pain. Oh, my God. And I always say to them, like, they go, is that pressure enough? And I go, just give me everything you've got. And sometimes they take it as a challenge. They're like, I'm going to... I'm going to destroy you. And I love it. I love it. Sometimes they just press the intercom and they're like, he's in again. Can we get you in? Yeah, yeah. Did I hear that right?

19:00Did you just say he likes needles? No, he gets the giggles. Oh, God. He likes it so fun, don't you? Yeah. I once had it where this guy, like, you know when they push in and you can feel the muscle twitch and they just hold it there. And it was so painful. My reaction to it was to, like, laugh hysterically. I was like a joker. It was weird. Wow. That's interesting. And that stops me from having the thoughts because if the pain's there, I'm like, it's so painful, but it's going to end soon. And that's all I can think about. What sort of thing? So if you like that and it might calm down and release, what do you do?

19:37What else do you do? So Chris is riddled with anxiety, right? Same. He has found Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, which genuinely is like the best thing ever. Switches your brain off. It's like going in that tank, but you're not in that tank. Yeah. It switches off. So people who are watching and listening to this podcast be sick of me banging on about it but when i get off the mats i've got verbal diarrhea because i've had time off from my own brain and sometimes if i'm when i'm traveling around and i go to with j i did it i didn't tell you this i went to a gym the other week and i literally got off the mats it was just a gym i'd visited on tour i got off the mats and i fucking sprinted out the door because i was like i will tell these people my life fucking story if i don't get out of here now my god the guys in my gym are fine i've known them for ages they just know he gets off the Matt and he can't talk.

20:21If I'm with strangers, they will literally be like, what is wrong with this person? So I had to just sprint out. Me two of my own just was waiting outside and I just literally still sweating, still didn't have my shoes on, ran out of the door. So I was like, I'm going to make a total tosser of myself. With jiu-jitsu, do you do it on your own or have you got someone there like a coach? You've got to fight for someone else. It's a fight. He wanted to buy one of those fake men that you've practiced with at home and I said no. Sorry, I didn't want to buy one. I asked for one for Christmas and I said never turned up none of my presents on Christopher Nolan were wrapped like a man in a gimp suit on the floor it's the worst thing I was like where did you where did you envisage living in the house well exactly bottom of the bed like a dog yeah yeah just wakes up every morning no but there's one of them no but you can there's one of them it's got actual sensors where arteries are and where joints are and if you get it in the right bit it goes tap tap tap it says tap and you go oh my god that's great I wanted to go ouch I want to go I want to go Is that all you got you slug

21:26More pressure Yeah exactly Well listen if you need to karate chop a neck I'm volunteering Oh yeah you should just practice a match As long as it's painful When I did Hebbin the sitcom Hebbin Kimberley Nixon who played me partner in it she went for a massage once in Manchester and she said to me she was like I need she was the same as you she was like I need them walking up and down me back. My God, I don't. Isn't that weird? I'm like, it hurts sometimes. I'm like, oh. But I never tell them. I just go through it. Whatever they say, is that pressure okay? Whatever it is, I say yes. Yeah, well. Even if I'm thinking.

22:01It's because you're people pleaser. I know, I know. Even if I'm thinking, oh, I wish it was a bit firmer. I'd never like lift my head up and go, do you know what? Could you actually go a bit firmer? And then I think, come on, Molly. You're paying for this 60 minutes and she's just there stroking you. Did you not have a pop star days? Did you guys not have like a masseuse around with you? No. Like when we were travelling on tour, sometimes we might treat ourselves like if there was a spa in the hotel, then it'd be like, I'm going to nip downstairs for a deep tissue. But no, we never really had someone following us.

22:29I remember JLS did. They were always on tour at the same time as us. And we were always so jealous. We were like, they've got a masseuse. They've got all this amazing stuff. Got her on condoms. Fucking hell, man. No, we never did. We never did. Oh, you see, you're missing a trick there. I know. It's all the backflipping that Aston was doing. If you were backflipping, then I'd gone for it. True, true, true. He loves a backflip, that lad. Loves a backflip. I think he's hurt himself recently. Really? He's probably doing backflips, that. They were on this podcast, and then I think they went on tour.

22:59He came on from all the tour. I think he went on tour, and on the second tour, I think he's done himself in. Oh, no. He's done a backflip, genuinely. I'm not 100 % sure. I think there's a problem with a backflip. I think if you can do a backflip, you're never going to stop, are you? I think it's a very addictive thing to do. Hello, Benson Boone. Totally. Because everyone's going to want you to do it, aren't they? Yeah. Can you show us the back? And you're like, go on then. So my fear would be three pints in, Ramsey, do your phone backflip. I'm like moving tables in the pub. You'd be doing it. We did.

23:30But if you nailed it, oh my God, what a feeling. We had a mate when we were younger. You used to live opposite him, Chris Simpson. Yeah, he could do backflips. He did gymnastics when he was a kid. And every time it would be like, do the flip. and everyone would be like walking home drunk from the town centre and he'd be just cartwheeling down the street. Every school has one kid that can do a backflip. Yeah. So on the estate I lived on when I was a kid, we used to go across the road to this other bit to play football and there was rumour of a kid who could do a frontflip off a wheelie bin. Was it him?

24:02No, it was a different kid. So it was just this random kid. I don't know if I've told you this. Now he's famous. I'm not kidding, right? so it wasn't bin day so there was no wheelie bins kicking around I'm not kidding we walked around for about an hour looking for a wheelie bin for this lad and we eventually found one it was just on the side of someone's house and we quickly went and got it and we pulled the wheelie bin out and he got it he jumped and he flipped and we were like hey we'll put it back it was what a night what a night the anticipation of trying to find it it was so incredible he would jump up and it was like it wasn't like he turned during the jump he went off the bin full rotation in the air landed perfect it was incredible unbelievable incredible I mean, that is an amazing skill.