Please Keep Me Anonymous with Vogue Williams

0:00Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney+. Let's go! Get ready for a new case. We're gonna crack this case and prove we're the greatest partners of all time! New friends.

0:09Rosie Ramsey:You are... Gary The Snake. And your last name? The Snake. Dream Team. In new habitats. Zootopia has a secret reptile population. You can watch the record-breaking phenomenon at home. You're clearly working at it. Zootopia 2. Now available on Disney+. Rated PG. Experience a membership that backs your business journey with American Express Business Platinum. When you pay with membership rewards points for all or part of an eligible flight booked with a qualifying airline through Amex Travel, you can get 35 % of those points back, up to 1 million points back per calendar year. American Express Business Platinum.

0:51There's nothing like it. Terms apply. Learn more at americanexpress.com slash business dash platinum. Hello, you are listening to and watching Please Keep Me Anonymous, a Shagmardinoid production. Ooh, nice.

1:07Rosie Ramsey:This week we are joined by Vogue Williams and it was such a fun chat. I actually cried laughing, which is my favourite kind of crying. Once again, like Ross from Friends and the Threesome, I could have just left the room and they probably wouldn't have even noticed I would have gone. But do you know what it is? I'm happy when you're happy, love. So I'm glad you had a nice time. Very, very good. Vogue's chatting about the jungle. She's also chatting about Celebrity Gladiators, which she has done and filmed. And it is on Christmas Day, 3.35. And interestingly enough, just a little tidbit for everyone watching and listening.

1:37Just before we spoke to that, I thought, ooh, I'd like to do Gladiators. And I text my agent saying, can I do Gladiators? And I have a missed call and a text saying, I can't tell if you're joking. So make of that what you will. Enjoy. Or please like, rate and subscribe. And if you're watching on YouTube, please subscribe. It would be very helpful.

1:54Rosie Ramsey:Thank you. Thanks. We had a fight about the jingle. We couldn't settle on a jingle. So this is the jingle. We hope you like the jingle. Do you want me to take them? I'll take one off so they don't bang. Are you sure? Yeah, I've got enough G.O.'s on, I'll survive. I love that to see you win that. I have a watch often you are literally Mr. T

2:28you are literally Mr. T that's the vibe I go for

2:36Rosie Ramsey:so funny I love that you're vlogging what does she even do what are you going to vlog I'm going to vlog life yeah okay I'm not going to I'm not breaking the mould of shit no no no just like anything that I think I'm doing is interesting. So this was interesting. The rest of my day is not. But I can guarantee compared to most you've got a really really interesting life. Yeah. Like you've got an interesting job. No but you do. I've seen you doing your washing on the telly. It looks great. I'm good at washing there. That's why I do excel in clothes washing. But people are like she doesn't wash her clothes.

3:10I'm like I actually do sometimes. Do you do?

3:12Rosie Ramsey:Was that your real was that one of your kids? Wasn't it? Which one did you watch? Was it your eldest? I'm sure on the advert. They've all had a go of it. Oh have they? I love that. Because they have to pay for their schooling. But there was one kid recently that wasn't mine. And I was like, he's the most well-behaved kid I've ever met. And I was like, that's obviously why Otto got the boost. They've not been asked back. They are not coming back. We'll have to ask. Have we even started? Have we started? We're recording wonderful. I love how chillies are. We used to do the full introduction. Like very much, very.

3:46Rosie Ramsey:And then we did the one with Olly Murs. And we were just chatting. and then Daisy kept it in and then we got loads of comments going it was really nice and at no point did I want to go stop talking a second hey everyone it was like let's just let them talk we do the intro later on and it's awkward for someone to sit there while you intro them I know it is someone reading your accolades while you're in the room it's one of the most revolting things I think that's northern people and it's Irish people we cannot bear a compliment that makes me shudder I'm like, can't take it. And also we need to come up with some other words because all we do is like, had a lovely chat, had a really great, like we need, what is that an adjective?

4:28Rosie Ramsey:What adjective is that? What adjective is that? I don't fucking know. It's an adjective, I believe is a describing word. We need to come up with more describing words. An adjective, that was good that you got there. You or your kids are out of the mind, so you're back in school. That's how I know. Yeah, I'm only going back to school now, so I'm only learning new things like that again. Our Robin's 10. It's horrible. And his homework, I swear to God. Adverbs, adverbials and all that. Spot the adverbal in this. Hello, chat GPT. Can you please tell me? I know, I Google everything. But like shapes, I'm like, I don't remember that shape.

5:00Rosie Ramsey:I know, oh my God, like what's a hexagon? What's a best to get like? I swear to God. Quizzes now, quizzes. I'm good at shapes. I'm minted shapes. Are you? You're good now? Yeah. Hexagon, six. Pentagon, five. Square, four. How come? Octagon, eight. He's obviously doing the homework. What have you been watching? Number blocks? I'll be watching the ships Welcome to ships with Chris Ramsey That'll be a great pod Great pod You'll never know You can't see the ships How was the jungle? Yes You're fresh, you are fresh out Fresh out, I've had the facial, got the hair done Nails are done, I'm back How long have you been back?

5:39Like two or three days? Two days I was busy yesterday It's like, time to scrape off the rotten. Was it minging? Was it as minging as it looks? It's like, I didn't speak to anyone before going in. First mistake. So silly. So much harder than it looks on TV. Like it's wild. Like Svenny was like, oh, I read an article with it where it said that they weren't being hard enough on the celebs. I was like, what? It's always nice to go in after they've had that revelation. Oh, I know. And I'm like, going straight after the year where it was easy. Yeah, that'll be nice. Yeah, it was not easy. but it is a lot of fun and like I've made I have made good friends because at the start when they were all really like have you fuck you're not speaking to them in a month it's Texas Ruby Wax this morning I love Ruby Wax alright come back in six months and tell me if you're still speaking well well you will see I will be with her in a month look what you have done you have made no no you have made a holiday friend we've all done it we've all made holiday let's meet up oh yeah you come out yeah and if they do meet up you can take them into your local and it's fucking horrible well excuse me for now I have friends yeah for now so you're still in a bubble I'm totally kidding because holiday friends it's because you're in an amazing place you're around a pool and stuff so you make friends easier it's probably actually harder to make friends in the jungle because one of the hardest bits I would find is genuinely everyone always says will you go in the jungle or whatever and I'm like I think most of the country would hate me if I went in the jungle because I'm sure you're true colours I need a certain amount of the day where I'm just on my own and left and he'd be with my own thoughts.

7:14The sitting around, filling the silence with people in the camp who stink, would upset me so much. The whole country would be like, and I'm not saying, fair play if you can do it, but everyone watching would go, he is a knob. He rolled, every time that poor lady said something, he rolled his eyes and then he went into that little booth and he slagged everyone off and he's not even, and he just looks in the distance when they're talking. You're not a team player either. The thing about it is though, you are filmed the whole day. I love being around people. I never spend time on my own. Not one second do I spend on my own.

7:53Can't bear it. So it was fine. So you're prying for it, yeah. They were very singy. So you would have liked it. I probably would love it, yeah. I'm not... When I'm at a gathering and some fucking twat gets an acoustic guitar out, I want to wrap it around the head. Honestly. Oh God, that is the worst. when someone brings a guitar. Oh see, I would like that bit.

8:11Rosie Ramsey:I can't. Oh look, Daryl brought his guitar. Oh what? No. No. I used to be married to a singer and I'd be like, ugh. Please groom. I can't. I'm just not a singy person. I'm not like that. Because I'm shy to this. I'm a really bad singer. I'm not a good dancer and there was a lot of singing and dancing. So I found that bit a little bit hard. Cringe. But like, it's not even that it was cringe because they were really good. Yeah, okay. It's cringe if people are shit. If people are shit. Do you know what I can't bear? I can't bear like board games and stuff. Do you know when people whack a board game out and when they're like, let's do this.

8:46Rosie Ramsey:I'm like, I'd rather die. I'd rather die. We played a lot of games. See, this is no, see, right. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do the games and shit. You're so bored though that you do this. You're so bored that you're like, Because there's no alternative. So it's like, most of it is just sitting around doing nothing. So you get, we try to work out the time because you don't know what time it is. They never tell you what time it is. And no one's allowed to talk to you. Like the security aren't allowed to talk to you when you leave the camp and you get a spell over your head. In my opinion, unnecessary.

9:13In my opinion, unnecessary. I just had full conversations with them though. I'm like, how are you? What's the crack? What's going on? They'd completely ignore you and I just continued this conversation. I made up names for them and there was one guy, there was a sound guy and he used to come into camp in the morning before we woke up and sometimes he'd wake us up and then we'd whinge about it but he would swap our mics and I was like, he was real, real good at ignoring me. I mean, I was like, but then I met him after and I was like, oh hang on that wasn't an act he's actually just he was still ignoring me when I went out I was like okay so hang on

9:47Rosie Ramsey:so you could wake up at half four in the morning or half eight in the morning and you wouldn't know we thought it was half five so we thought we woke up at half five in the morning they would start waking us up because we worked out that the show was on at seven so you'd hear them shouting I was gonna everybody get me out of here and then you'd kind of work it out from then that's like Hunger Games yeah it's like that's torture I know but like it was quite it's like being in the arena at Hunger Games and working out who's died by the dongs I don't believe Ant and Dec would have something to say about that but yeah whatever yeah oh I couldn't believe Ant and Dec you're running the Hunger Games shame welcome to the Hunger Games you can't feel like that at points but you don't you don't care though because like now that I've got back I'm like oh my god there's so much stuff to do and like you don't fully appreciate how much time you have to just like do normal stuff you don't have your phone and like it's quite nice to go and collect wood and to do all those things.

10:39Because like, so like back to, I don't know, the Stone Age.

10:43Rosie Ramsey:Yeah. Did you miss the kids? Yeah. That's my thing. I think that got me. Uh-huh. Yeah. I think that leaving them, because you don't speak to anyone, so they take your phone off when you land. Yeah. And then you've no phone, you can't speak to anyone. And I wish I'd brought a burner phone. But you had time beforehand, didn't you? So you went in later. Yeah. So what happened? So when you land in Australia, they take your phone. Take your phone. So then how long until you went in the jungle? so then it was three days before I went to the jungle and so you have a chaperone with you the whole time my poor chaperone I was like at half six in the morning come on we're going to the gym she's like meow oh my god wow she's cool I'd be like thankful I'd be like I don't want to be here but I'm actually quite glad they're going to be here stop you like just picking up a landline and no you don't ring anyone no but you forget about your phone so quickly and I was I love my phone so much and then I was like it didn't matter nice to have a brain and then getting out it's kind of I was a bit scared to turn it back on It's like, you know, it's your birthday and people find out and they start texting.

11:37It's like, you're ruining my birthday. Like, now I have to run back to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

11:40Rosie Ramsey:Yeah, stop texting. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, ba. This episode is brought to you by Google Chrome. You think you know a browser, but Gemini and Chrome, that's new. It can help you with practically anything on the web, like restoring a vintage motorcycle from a 50-page restoration block, or finally break down that long article you've had open for weeks. Gemini and Chrome is here for it. Ready to make anything online make sense? There's no place like Chrome. Check responses set up required compatibility and availability varies 18+. Legally, we can't say drinking Storm makes you smarter and more focused.

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12:25Rosie Ramsey:Plan B is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan. It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription or age requirement. It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception and it won't impact your future fertility. That's Freedom the B. Use as directed. So you've made friends. Who else have you really? who else have you made friends with? I've actually already seen Tom.

13:02Oh right.

13:03Rosie Ramsey:Okay. Was on the flight home. No, bumped into him at the bus stop. He was getting the bus stop. He was getting the bus stop. Do you get the bus? I get the tube. Oh. And I cycle everywhere. Oh nice. Do you wear a helmet? Do you wear a helmet? I do wear a helmet. Good. Sometimes I wear a helmet. I know. We were coming here in the taxi this morning and I can't believe the amount of people with no helmets on. Madness. They're going to come off and they're going to be brain damaged and they need to put a helmet on. you nutters your helmet helmets are a bit rotten but like you have to wear a helmet I do wear a helmet they're awful and your hair's going to be shit for the rest of the day but you are going to save yourself from a really serious head injury or death us two and the taxi driver this morning collectively came up with the idea of a foldable helmet like the Brompton bike Google it already exists foldable helmet so I was I was I was billionaire then it went I felt that's a great idea I wonder if that person how ugly are they though so they're more of a it's basically a headband with a pop-out top is the best way I can describe it it's like quite thick around this like those buckets you know the buckets the new buckets that you get they don't work as well no you're gonna you're still gonna have a bad head yeah and you're gonna get actually to be fair the legal troubles I would get into when someone died using one of my foldable helmets that I just invented I'm actually glad do you know what it is I've tasted that success and I don't want it you don't need it you're busy that was a rollercoaster in my mind there I was in court it's kind of a good idea are you like this like so you I feel like you are probably a really good entrepreneur and like you and Sven put Sven set together I can imagine you're doing like lots of business ventures and stuff like that me and Chris come up with loads of ideas right all the time and we never ever see them through ever I swear to God like we're always like oh my God we should do this we should do that never one never ever no no no how would you do it like what are we we're just stupid well I've loads of ideas that I don't bother either I was like I'm going to start my own coffee brand because I love coffee so much and then I'm like, there's loads of coffee brands, isn't there?

15:01Yeah. It is that in it though. I'll just bring a whole suitcase full from Australia. It's basically, that's fine. But it's basically like, right, I'm going out for a run. It's raining. Like that. That's how quickly you can just put your idea up. My most recent one,

15:14Rosie Ramsey:my most recent one was like, I would love to open a coffee shop where we live. Like a really lovely coffee shop. Oh, I know. Yeah, but then I was like, I'm going to have to get up really early and then I'll have to be there. I'll have to be there all day. and I would just put myself off and I was like and then yeah then I'll have to everyone who comes in I'll have to speak oh god oh no it's a nice idea for retirement tomorrow yeah yeah that would be nice that's not retirement though is it well I don't ever want to retire you see because I feel like as soon as I retire I'll die right you're a shark you're a shark what do you mean I'm a shark so if you stop swimming you'll die yeah exactly yeah do I swim the whole time sharks I think they never ever stop I think that's where the sayings come from I think am I hang on I'm so glad I've learned something today.

15:57Rosie Ramsey:If this jumps from into the day. So what's just happened is, and this happens quite often, I will tell Rosie a fact or a phrase. Is that true? Rosie will take the fact of the phrase. No, it is, but Rosie will take it and she'll tell it to someone else with the confidence of the person who knew it in the first place. And then a beautiful moment happens where, frankly, you've just said to Rosie, is that true? And Rosie's in her head, there's a fucking alarm going off. There's panic. There's fucking, there's chimps running around, there's madness. Ron, get out, fire. Who cares if it's true or not?

16:30Just say allegedly at the end.

16:33Rosie Ramsey:Allegedly. I need to have more conviction in what I say. If sharks stop swimming, they die. Well, I said Bob Dylan was dead the other day. I was like, God, Bob Dylan was playing. I was like, no, he wasn't. I was like, no, he didn't just die, by the way. He's dead years. And the producer was like, he's alive. I was like, oh, really? I had him killed off. I was so convinced of it I was like laughing at her and stuff I was like that's ridiculous Joanne wow he isn't alive wow he's fully I don't know I don't know he was dead over alive we do that all the time actually right you're going on you're going on Gladiators yeah you're going to be a bloody I've done it oh you've done it yeah but it's on Christmas Day Christmas Day at 3.35 do you know what that's actually that's a good time because that's a oh hang on are you posh No, my husband is though.

17:26Okay.

17:26Rosie Ramsey:When do you eat your Christmas lunch? I think we're going to eat it about, I eat around the kids' schedule. So like one or two. See, we have ours at like one o 'clock. Well, who doesn't have the evening? Oh my God. Something of it later on. I grew up with a girl from school and her family used to eat so late that I'd literally, I sent my mum, I was like, I can't go to her house, I've got such a bad stomach because they eat so late. I'd be like, my stomach would go. Every meal, not just Christmas. Oh, just all the time? Just all the time. But yeah, so people will be finished their lunch and they'll be digesting and the telly will be on.

17:57Rosie Ramsey:3.35 is actually the perfect time. That's perfect snooze in front of the telly. It's digesting time. I don't want them snoozing, please. Oh, they'll be snoozing. Okay, you'll be snoozing because of the beautiful, warm nostalgia that's getting pumped out from Gladiators. Gladiators were on a sick show though I always wanted to do it. Like so, but do you remember watching when you were younger? Oh my God. We used to say my stepdad was like your man because he's from Scotland and he'd be like, Amber, you will go. Oh my God. Because he was really strict and he'd be like, we used to get all the every Saturday night we'd get all the cushions off in the good room because my mum had like the posh room that we weren't allowed in mad she would drink her coffee in there in the morning I don't think she was very happy but anyway and then it's like a nice room it is a lovely room soundproof padding on the walls inside the lock and we would go in there every Saturday night and get all the cushions off the set A and jump around the cushions it was such a nice memory oh I know it's good what was it like it was the first time I was like I'm 40 like I was in bits I was in bits really because you do the first day and you kind of practice everything and I was like oh well not as good as I thought I'd be and then and that's when you're not against a gladiator what's the practice so you do everything so you try everything on the eliminator right I got Joe Wicks to film me doing the eliminator and I was like running up the what's it called the travelator yeah yeah straight down on my face stop yeah not a great runner even though I do a lot of it I was going to say you're super fit no not really and then the gladiators are coming at you so you're like you're kind of terrified of them but I love having people like that on TV because when you look at like young girls and I thought that like I'd love my daughter to watch them and be like look how sick they are yeah like strong yeah they're strong women who will absolutely batter you if you piss them off yeah yeah the female gladiators are no joke they're all they're all like stacked boys girls a lot of them we did a thing for children in need with them where I had to do a dance thing with them and they were just massive yeah massive they put so much effort into that and they're such like they're just great characters as well they're really lovely and what I said before not one spot on them bums spot boss oh my god why are you talking spot boss sorry she's just said that to me like I said before like it's a thing she always says what's happening I think about this all the time because girls with tongue bikinis how the fuck do they get how because if I'm on holiday maybe I've got a bit of a spot

20:33you're both laughing so much you're not making any sound just one

20:36Rosie Ramsey:just one little spot just a like a rogue little spot and you did that thing with children in the with the gladiators and all the girls had like tiny and I was like not one of them that's their costume they don't have any spots in their heart Press your stand, right? Oh, God, I've grown my eyes. I actually have a pair of bikini bottoms that I can't wear. Because they gave me such a bad rash. It was so rotten. It felt like, what's wrong with your arse?

21:08Oh, jeez, but God, it was so bad. The baby stuff.

21:13Rosie Ramsey:Oh, my God, yeah. I don't wear those that bikini anymore. Do you remember when I had Robin and I got follicles? I started to go at the top and I started to go at the top. It looked like someone had run a cheese grater over both our arse cheeks. It was really bad. It was red. It's like, I think people get it on their arms sometimes. After I had Robin, I had to go at the top. That's because I was like, what's happening to my bum? It's like really, really red, like exposed paws. Oh no, I love your arm. On the back of someone's arm, yeah, they'll get like the red. It's such hard that. Oh my God, I can't believe you get spot bars.