What’s the Snark on Colton Underwood?

29:00It was very, very scary. And I think she later dropped the restraining order. But regardless, at some point, she felt incredibly threatened and scared by this man, as did her family. Yes. It is so disturbing. And that's why also it was so jarring when I was doing this research and reading up on the details of the stalking and harassment case. And then to turn on Hulu and watch him co-hosting a show, it is so jarring because this is so beyond disturbing, you guys. Trigger warning. It is just if you have experience with a crazy ex-boyfriend who is off his rocker, maybe skip ahead. This is so crazy.

29:48Speaking of unknown number, it's giving Kendra Licari. One of the things that Colton would do was he would send Cassie weird slash threatening text messages from a stalker from an unknown number and then also text himself. Oh, my God. I forgot about that, Sophie. Crazy. Okay. So I will read some of those texts. But first, Colton was sending texts to Cassie and her friends and family from his own number. Before the anonymous harassment started, he would say things like, you're a selfish person. This was after they broke up. And Cassie is clearly trying to distance herself from him. And he's not letting her.

30:33He is having a problem with being rejected or losing control over Cassie. You're a selfish person who isn't ready to be loved. I spent two years loving you the best I could. And now I'm sitting here feeling like a fool. You've hurt me beyond words. I've always done nothing but be there for you. And you still disrespect me all the time. And she's like, what did I even do? What caused this? Why are you so angry? Just crazy stuff. He goes, I'm not like your ex. I'm not going to sit around and let you use and abuse me. This playbook is all too familiar. Such a weirdo. I remember this kind of being a thing.

31:08She had filmed a reality show before going on as a contestant of The Bachelor. And he weaponized this against her. He said in the same text message, I remember telling myself when you went back and filmed Young Once with Michelle during Bachelor to clarify your position with him, asking myself, if this chick just did that to her ex of five years, what's she going to do to me? I'm praying for you and hoping you have a deep dive within yourself and your motives with the people in your life. You have a good heart and good people in it. I hope you don't drive them away. Yeah, so he would constantly weaponize that against her.

31:41That's such a good point. Like he basically accuses her of using him for fame. Yes. He also texts one of her best friends a crazy amount, just a bombardment. There are screenshots from the restraining order filing. And it is like 35 texts in a row that aren't being answered. He says things like, this is just a small segment of it. I've held my tongue on a lot of stuff and saved her multiple times. I've always put her first. He's talking about Cassie to one of Cassie's best friends. Put her first in everything I did. Want to know what I got in return? Her mom taking a trip to Paris with her. What?

32:21Her sister taking a trip to Miami with her. So if she goes on trips with her family members, that's good for her. Her telling me she needs to feel independent and free. Yeah, that's pretty fair. Her admitting she's texting her ex of five years. Her seeing Landon, a guy who fucked her in her own home against her parents' wishes. What is he talking about? This is, to be clear on these screenshots, not responding at all. It's paragraphs and paragraphs and paragraphs. Yeah. Oh, my God. He also texted Cassie's brother about her. And this is after, like you mentioned, Cassie's brother saw him loitering in the alley behind their parents' Huntington Beach home at 2 a.m.

33:07That I remember rang a serious bell. And for reference, Colton is six foot five and like 260 pounds. He is terrifying. The fact that he was loitering in the alley behind their home at 2 a.m. is terrifying. And so Cassie's brother, like a good brother, thank God my takeaway from a lot of this is like, thank God that Cassie had the support system that she had during this time. Cassie's brother confronted him. Oh my God, This is so scary. Sorry, I'm reading ahead. Colton sent him paragraphs and paragraphs. She went on The Bachelor, the same show that caused my anxiety and depression for nearly a year.

33:47She knew that show fucked with me in ways no one else knew and messed with her too. We agreed to not talk about our breakup and the first place she took it was the same people who harassed and abused me for a year. It's like, what is he talking about? Yeah. I know you know Cassie and so do I. She's a kind-hearted person who wants to be loved. She just did it at my expense this time. I have no one else in my life to talk to about this. I moved to California to be close to her and feel a part of your family. I don't have that anymore. I have no support system out here. And the one person who gets me doesn't want to be with me.

34:18I know I had plenty of issues or flags for your fam to deal with. I think you meant red flags. But I'm not used to this either. I needed the same grace Cassie got. Instead, I took the blame for most of it, dude. This is hard and confusing and lonely as fuck. I know I had plenty of issues. Or wait. Yeah, same text. This is hard and confusing and lonely as fuck. Same text. And then the brother goes, to be completely honest, man, this isn't a conversation that I feel like I can totally have right now. Not really sure I can talk too much on this topic. Talk for her slash talk for her. It's just something you guys will have to talk and figure out.

34:49But as far as being lonely in regards to talking to someone about this, I'm sorry, man, that's a hard place to be. And I'm here if you need a call. But I'm not going to sit here and text back and forth about this. Just not my place. I text you because I saw you in the alley and just wanted to check to make sure everything was okay. Oh, and these timestamps, to be clear, when he said, I just I texted you because I saw you in the alley. It's 2.44 a.m. in the morning. And when Landon texts him that literally within 10 minutes of Colton, Colton doesn't respond. And then he texts him back five hours later at 7.30 in the morning.

35:22Oh, I'm sorry for putting you in a weird position last night. So you catch your sister's ex-boyfriend loitering the alley 2.30. He sends you paragraphs of incoherent gibberish. You respond saying, I'm here if you want to talk, but this is not a conversation we should be having right now. Then Colton doesn't respond, text him five hours later. Like, it's so weird. So weird. Nothing makes you appreciate good bedding more than a hot summer night, especially when your air conditioning is broken like ours was recently. I don't want to talk about it. Having something that's lightweight, breathable, cool, and easy to sleep in, no matter how hot it gets, is so freaking important.

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39:14that's the sound of zero sugar 200 milligrams of caffeine and the power to burn body fat storm energy for life storm energy blend helps boost metabolism which in combination with exercise and a healthy diet helps burn fat this product alone does not produce weight loss individual results may vary colton also at the same time while he's harassing her family and friends is also still harassing her over text and i know crazy sends her like a million texts yo, can you call? Can you call? This is after they're broken up. Says things like, I'm just sitting in bed trying to fall asleep, wondering if the woman I'm madly in love with is having a good time with her ex.

39:51I have a million questions and all of them. I don't know if I want the answers to. My heart hurts a lot right now. And I miss my best friend, my lover, and the one person I never expected to lose. Thankfully, Cassie sets boundaries. She responds to him. And this is after, is it, is it barrage or barrage? I always pronounce it wrong. I'm going to say it's barrage, a barrage of text. She responds, Colton, I really care about you too. I know going through everything is very hard and sucks and I appreciate you calling me to talk with me, but also I don't want to make it into something it isn't. You know that us trusting each other and being with each other and caring about each other is still there.

40:29I don't think that this is something that should be able to flip flop so easily. And also it's a different road we are navigating now that we aren't used to. Don't be upset. You know I care about you so much. You know that. A lot of Cassie's responses are trying to not only set boundaries, but be like, be cool because we are public figures. Again, this was after The Bachelor. They were on The Bachelor series together. They are celebrities at this point. She doesn't want this to get out. She doesn't want this to become like a messy thing that it ultimately ends up becoming. And of course it does.

41:05Yeah, she says after he continues to harass her, she says, can we just be cool, please? My mom isn't talking to anyone. I know you're hyper paranoid about things like that, but I wouldn't lie to you. I have no reason to. So for me and for you, let's just be happy and not overthink or stress. She's trying to like calm him down. Yeah. Constantly. To be honest, as I'm reading these messages, I'm concerned about his wellbeing. Oh, it's so concerning. Yeah. Okay. And she probably felt that too. She probably felt, I don't want to piss him off because what if he harms himself or does something extreme?

41:39Or harms her. Yeah, in a sound state of mind right now, but based on these text messages. Totally. As for the fake stalker texts, his fake stalker texts to Cassie, and this is from an unknown number. This is so scary, you guys. He says, and by the way, just keep this in mind. This is coming from Colton. There's no fake anonymous stalker. This is from Colton. And he later admits it. Hi, Cassie. You like playing games, huh? Let's play some games then. Let's just say we used to be family friends. Be young. Have your good time. You'll have nothing but regrets later with how you treat people. Smiley face, smiley face.

42:21She doesn't respond. Another smiley face. By the way, the timestamp's 11, 11 p.m., 3.50 a.m. Crazy. Totally seems like you're growing up, lols, living at home still, making fun of her for living at home, I guess. Was wondering how long it would take for you to run back to an old flame slash hookup. So it's kind of mirroring Colton being paranoid about her hooking up with her ex. The whole town knows all you ever wanted was to be famous. Congrats, you got it, but at what cost? Super fake. Wonder what Colton will think about this. Does he know you've been seeing Kaylin too? Lols, what's next for you?

42:59say hi to B for me. And B is her ex, apparently. No, so I'm actually so scared. No, I know. And again, she's not responding to any of these. And it's clear he's texting from a Google phone or from those weird apps because it's coming in green. But oh my God, she's not responding to any of these messages and he keeps going. It's so scary. And then he does the same thing to himself. Oh, my God. No, Sophie, I'm like, actually, I completely forgot about all this. This is so scary. I forgot that he was texting himself. I know we said it up top, but like to see it on the screen is very, very unsettling.

43:40Yeah. So he texts himself too. And by the way, B Brighton is Cassie's now fiance. So good for her. But he clearly was very insecure hear about B Brighton because he sends them texts about Brighton to himself as a stalker. Cassie has been seeing one of her old flames in HB Huntington Beach. Brighton is his name. Thought you should know. She also has been with her ex, Caitlin, several times since you broke up, but you already know that. P.S. Rumors are true. Her family doesn't like you. You should hear how they speak about you. Colton, question mark. You do know she's just in this for fame. We heard her mom set this all up.

44:21Why are you still, dude, smiley face, why are you still attracted to Cassie? She doesn't like you, dude. You are too square for her, lols. She needs a bad boy and you're a deaf, not that. Ha ha ha ha ha. I'm picturing the voice from the Unknown Number documentary. Yeah, like that, the scary robot voice. Yeah. The family obviously never liked you. You awkward fuck. Her mom made sure people knew that they were struggling with you. rumor was having you in their house during COVID pushed them to tell Cassie to dump your lame ass get a job so Colton used this to bond with Cassie and was like hey I'm getting weird texts from this weird stalker like are you getting these texts too oh my god diabolical so then like we mentioned also, Colton placed a tracking device on her car, a small black disc on her like bumper area, I believe, to monitor her whereabouts.

45:23Cassie discovered the device. And that is when she contacted the police and hired a private investigator to investigate who the stalker was. Colton would also obsessively, so she wasn't fully living with her parents. She also had a place in LA at the time. And he would obsessively walk around and stalk her LA home. From the restraining order, Cassie states that on July 27th of 2020, Cassie's friend, Kaylin, who they keep mentioning a lot. It's either Kaylin's good friend. It's not Kaylin Miller Keys. It's either her good friend or an ex, someone who she was spending time with. Based on these texts, it sounds like Kaylin was an ex or an old feeling because Colton's clearly triggered by this person.

46:11Colton's jealous. So Cassie's friend Kaylin visited her at her apartment. Colton somehow immediately knew and obsessively called and sent text messages to Cassie about the visit. Cassie was startled that he knew who was coming in and out of her apartment and felt like she was being watched. A few days later, Colton showed up again at Cassie's apartment, still upset again about Kaylin's visit a few days prior. he proceeded to yell at Cassie and threatened, I am going to keep you accountable. And that sounds like a threat, first of all. Second of all, just to remind everyone, 6 '5", 250, 260 pounds.

46:45This is like a former NFL, even if you don't really play, defensive end. That is terrifying. It is. And trust me, even though he's this sweet baby-faced NFL, I'm putting hunk in quotes, quotes, people have killed their significant others for much less. It's incredibly, I wouldn't say common, but this exists all around us. And it's really sad that this was just thrown off. It's like, oh, he's just sad. He's just a sad ex. I've had friends who've been stalked by exes who show up at their house, leave notes on their car with my friend not even realizing her ex was even in the parking lot. This is very, very dramatic for someone and leaves everlasting impacts on on their brain and on their life.

47:33Oh, for sure. Extremely traumatic. Yes. And like you said, this is how it starts with something that could end very, very, very badly domestic violence wise. This is how it starts. And it is him feeling like he's losing control. Her restraining order was, oh, OK, wait, important part. When Cassie, I believe, she told Colton that she was involving police and a private investigator, That is when Colton admitted that he was the one who placed the tracking device and sent the harassing text from that anonymous number. Yeah, he was just like, you know what, whatever. Okay, it was me. Sorry. Exactly.

48:15And I think he was trying to, like, do damage control. He's like, okay, okay, we can, like, stop now. But her restraining order that she filed was ultimately granted. And it ordered Colton to stay 100 yards away from Cassie, her home, workplace, car, etc. and they had a court date set in October of 2020. However, Cassie ultimately dropped the restraining order with prejudice and requested the police drop the investigation and said that the two reached a private agreement behind the scenes. And I don't know, like, did he pay her off? Or maybe it was just she didn't want to go through the stress of a trial in the public eye or anything like that.

48:52So who knows? I don't blame her. I was going to say that if I were her, I would probably have done the same thing just because having to go to court and the documentation and the paperwork. I mean, let's not forget that they're in the public eye and very heavily in the public eye at this time. That itself would have been another traumatic event on top of an already traumatic event. I totally do not blame her and understand that she decided to drop it. She's like, I just want to leave it behind me and I want to move on. Yeah. I watched a few YouTube videos about this, and I just want to read. There were some really good comments that I feel like shed light onto his motives, because you might be wondering, well, he came out as gay.

49:33What was his obsession with his ex-girlfriend who was a woman? Priscilla Carmona writes in the comment section of a YouTube video I watched about this. I'm a family law paralegal working in California. I see these kinds of issues every day. So it is mind-boggling how we do not talk about this issue more. It is such a devastating event that is so pervasive throughout all cultures and societies. It's disgusting how often the perpetrator's behavior is normalized, passed off as love bombing or I will never give up equals virtuous. You can clearly tell Colton views Cassie as a possession. That need to maintain power slash control over people is where all DV incidents, domestic violence incidents stem.

50:15I deal with some very egregious cases, physical torture and psychological violence. However, domestic violence always starts small and escalates when perpetrators test their victims' boundaries. The more they test and pass, the bigger the action becomes. I'm glad Cassie reached out for help when she did and had the resources to do so. People need to understand these behaviors will always escalate. Yeah. Which is such a good point. Yeah. It's never just someone comes to your door with a weapon. It's going to start small. It's texts. It's unknown numbers. It's loitering outside your home. You know, you start, quote unquote, small.

50:50Yeah. And like you see in the text messages where he's like, she just wants to be loved and I want to love her. And like, I'm so I have no support system. I need my best friend. Like it's starting. It's like, oh, he's just like a sad puppy in love. But really, it's manipulative. And it's about him losing control. And he sees Cassie as a possession and not an autonomous human being. When he says she had the audacity to go to Paris with her mom. Because she's my possession. How dare she go anywhere without my approval? Yeah, without me. That's just no, no way. So this other comment from Cole Cherise on YouTube, I also thought was really insightful.

51:30It says, I feel like if a beloved, handsome celebrity NFL player and actor like OJ Simpson could stalk, beat up and ultimately knife Nicole Brown to death because she rejected at him and saw something dark in him, who's to say Colton, another golden boy NFL player and reality TV actor, couldn't stalk and eventually kill Cassie for leaving him. Love and infatuation makes people do sick things. They think they've lost something they had earned with that person and they refuse to let another person have them. If he snapped this much over her breaking up with him, imagine what he'll want to do when she's moving on to a new love interest.

52:02Plus, he's probably furious and humiliated that she's reported him and made all of this public. He's basically undateable now to all other women. Yeah, I mean. It's true. So he shouldn't be dating any. He shouldn't be dating anyone at this point. This is a dangerous person. Yeah, extremely dangerous. If it's going to happen with Cassie, it certainly will happen to another individual. And once again, props to Cassie for advocating for herself via restraining order for making it public so that people know that he's dangerous. for just speaking up in a way that maybe some women would feel afraid to.

52:43She really had the balls. And I really, really, really commend her for... There's no, like, right way to act when you're in a situation like this. It was, I'm sure, extremely traumatic and terrifying for her. But she did all things right that you could want a victim of a stalking case to do. You report it to authorities. you have documented with screenshots yes oh my god just fucking terrifying actually that is such a good point the fact that she went out of her way to file a police report and i'm not judging anyone who doesn't either that's totally your own volition everyone's journey is different i think it takes a lot of strength and courage to realize that the person that you once loved or spent a lot of time with that you integrated into your family could potentially be a harm to you and you're actively taking action to document it and make sure that this person's wrongs are are made public this is not okay this is so so sad and and honestly I know how hard it is because my friend was legitimately stalked by her ex-boyfriend when they broke up and when he was showing up pounding on her door she called the police and was she was even scared to call the police she was like I can't call the police on this guy this is gonna this could ruin his life right I'm glad that she ended up doing it, but it's really hard to even take that step.

54:07I know. So she's a strong woman for sure. Oh my God. It's freaking terrifying. God, fuck Colton Underwood. It's great. And now take this information that you have just learned. If you weren't familiar with the details of the stocking case, know that he is, like I said, on TV right now, hosting a television show on Hulu and also is cast on the upcoming season of our favorite show, The Traitors. Like, it is so mind-boggling. Hey, friends. Olivia from Oli. Between new routines and the ultimate group project known as parenting, you need science-backed solutions that work with your life. That's where Oli comes in.

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56:32Other companies might sell just credit monitoring or just a VPN. Aura gives you all of it, together, at the same price competitors charge for just one service. Start your free trial today at aura.com slash remove. Protect yourself now at aura.com slash remove. Just a few short months later, in early 2021, Colton comes out as gay. During an exclusive interview with Robin Roberts on Good Morning America, he comes out and said that he had been struggling with his sexuality for quite some time and hated himself. And he's finally come to terms with the fact that he's gay and he's now the happiest and healthiest he's ever been.

57:14He also announced his new Netflix show, Coming Out Colton. Obviously, there was immediate backlash when the show was announced. Colton had serious allegations against him. And instead of confronting them or being held accountable, the show really kind of glossed over them and focused on his journey with coming out. There was a Change.org petition with tens of thousands of signatures for Netflix to cancel the show. Of course, we know now that they unfortunately did not. But something that was interesting, he also did an interview with Variety when he came out. And he disclosed that an anonymous individual sent him an email threatening to release nude photos allegedly taken during his visit to a Los Angeles spa known for catering to gay clientele.

58:09And the sender claimed to have been taking compromising images of Colton and threatened to expose them to the media. Colton forwarded the email to his publicist, Alex Bellier, making this the first time he openly addresses sexuality with someone close to him. He later acknowledged that this incident played a significant role in his decision to publicly come out. He also said this is when he admitted that he had been on Grindr and had sexual encounters with men prior to going on The Bachelorette on Becca Kuprin's season, claiming to be a virgin. and all of this like I said the announcement of the show garnered a ton of backlash and also him choosing to come out when he did garnered backlash even though you know coming out is never easy and applaud anyone who comes out publicly obviously you know it's also someone who was in the NFL like a very masculine locker room environment I'm sure it was hard for him to come to terms with this and to finally come out.

59:14So great. But obviously the timing was kind of sus to people. A lot of people felt like he was trying to control the narrative, rehab his image after the stalking incident became so public and distract people from his problematic actions. Writing for them, journalist Rafi Ermac called Coming Out Colton. So remember, in tandem, he comes out and then also announces this new show, little more than an empty and soulless PR stunt, and notes that the series ultimately sidestepped Colton's real story by avoiding accountability. Lance Bass also offered Colton some advice when he came out, suggesting that announcing the show as he was coming out was indicative that he was trying to monetize his coming out.

1:00:04Yes, objectively, that's correct. That's factual. Yeah. Yeah. So I refuse to watch Coming Out Colton. I draw the line at watching Coming Out Colton. I watched a little bit of Are You My First? I will not watch this. So I'm sorry. I asked chat GBT about Coming Out Colton and how they exactly sidestepped his stalking scandal. Basically, the premise is mostly about, I mean, it's obvious how Colton comes to terms publicly with his sexuality and navigates life as an openly gay man after years of hiding it. So it documents his process of accepting that he's gay, the self-reflection and emotional challenges he faced prior to coming out publicly.

1:00:49It shows Colton telling his family and friends, capturing the reactions of the dynamics of reconciling with loved ones after keeping such a significant part of his identity private. It covers his decision to come out in Good Morning America. It shows him exploring the LGBTQ community, dating, and his identity beyond the context of being a former reality TV star. He learns about gay culture and attempts to connect authentically in his new chapter of life. And it only briefly touches on the stalking scandal. You know what? I have to admit, I watched the first episode when I came out. Christy, no.

1:01:25I know. I don't even know why, what willed me to do this. I haven't watched Girls. I haven't watched Sex and the City, but I watched the first episode of Coming Out, Colton. And that is on me. And you know what? I'm willing to own that. You have to live with that. I have to live with that. Exactly. But I remember distinctly curious about how he would address it. And to your point in your notes, I do recall, I couldn't tell you anything about the show. Genuinely do not remember a lick of it. But I do remember this one scene. He was in his kitchen in his newly renovated home that he had just maybe bought.

1:01:57He was in the kitchen with, I think, a high school. It was a woman, I remember, he was talking with about the scandal. And of course, they want to portray him talking to a woman about the stalking of his ex-girlfriend. But he basically said, it was a dark period of my life and blah, blah, blah, giving all these excuses. And it was the woman who was responding back to him saying, I've always known you as a great guy. by trying to put him in this life as if he was such a normal man who made a mistake. Like, I remember just that kind of imprinting on my brain. I don't remember the specifics. Again, it was years ago when I watched this, but I felt like it was very intentional what they were trying to do to bring a female into his home vouching for his character when, in fact, the screenshots show a different story.

1:02:40Yeah. Angel. You're no angel either. You're no angel either, sweetheart. Thank you for being boots on the ground and having watched Coming Out Colton. I can't believe you gave up after episode one. Wow. I mean, again, I'll have to live with this for the rest of my life. I'm even ashamed to admit this, but I was just very curious. The curiosity pushed me to do so, but I couldn't tell you what the whole show was about after that. Yeah. So he, like you mentioned, brushes over it, says that he was fucked up during that time in his life, and he made a lot of bad choices, quote unquote. As we are reading some of those texts, it's very obvious that he was going through a very difficult period and was struggling with his mental health.

1:03:21That is not an excuse to terrorize someone and put a tracking device on their car. Yeah, there's got to be some boundaries. And there was not a single boundary for his own mental health. You can't bombard and traumatize someone just because you're going through it. Plenty of people go through it. You got to deal with that on your own. Talk with a therapist. Seek medication from a psychiatrist to help your anxiety. There's so many other avenues than attacking and harassing someone that was once a big part of your life. I've crashed out over an ex before. I have not once showed up at 2 a.m. in the alley of their parents' home.

1:03:58Correct. Or harassed them and myself from a fake number. It literally is giving Kendra Licari from unknown number. No, it genuinely is. And we did an episode on Kendra Licari on our Patreon yesterday, patreon.com slash snarkbait pod. But let us not fail to mention that not only is Cassie traumatized by this event, but her whole family, it seems, were drug into this and not at their own volition. They were totally brought into this whole circus and they didn't sign up for any of this. There's just a normal family living their life and they have their daughter's ex just loitering and trespassing around the perimeter of their home.

1:04:38How dare he? Bringing in the sister saying that even we didn't mention this, but in the text messages, Michelle Randolph, Cassie's sister, was dating Greg Sulkin at the time that Colton and Cassie were together. And not Greg and Michelle catching strays. He starts saying, oh, beware about Michelle, Greg. She's using Greg. Just bringing her whole family into this circus that they didn't ask for is completely diabolical and unforgivable. Also in those texts where he's like, when he's pretending to be the stalker, pretending to be like an anonymous stalker, he goes, she just wanted to be famous. As if you didn't.

1:05:14You're the thirstiest one out of this franchise, Colton. Exactly. Shut up. Exactly. He's so thirsty. Oh, my God. He pisses me off. Shut up. I know. I hate him. So obviously the show got panned and heavily criticized, like we said, for brushing over the serious nature of the allegations against him. It focused obviously more on his coming out journey than accountability for him. Them magazine described the series again as a distasteful extension of a brand that doesn't mean much to begin with. kind of suggesting that the show served more as a vehicle for Colton's public redemption arc than a kind of genuine exploration of anything deep or his past wrongdoings.

1:05:59Yeah. And it's crazy that Netflix gave him this platform to do this. Like, it's crazy to me. And I keep thinking back on this. If the roles were reversed and Cassie was doing this to Colton, do you think, and Cassie came out as a lesbian, do you think in any world Netflix would have given Cassie a show? No. Cassie would still have any relevancy today. And sorry, I'm just going on Colton's stupid, stupid Instagram. Guess how many Instagram followers he has today? He has like one point something million. 1.8 million. 1.8 million. Who is still following this man? It's crazy. What does he have to offer on his page that is of any value?

1:06:40Literally nothing. Nothing. So I feel like there's this tension between the fact that he is, you know, it's groundbreaking that he is the first past bachelor lead to come out as gay. Great. We want to applaud that. But at the same time, he as a person did this terrible, scary, horrible thing. There's no excuse for it. And so him trying to tie those two things together, I think a lot of people find troubling. Yeah. In 2022, Colton confirms he is engaged to Democratic strategist Jordan C. Brown after beginning the relationship in late 2021. In 2023, the two get married. And in 2024, Colton and Jordan welcome a baby boy via egg donor and surrogate named Bishop Colton Brown Underwood.

1:07:32So he's a family man now, you guys. Like, all is forgiven. He's a family man. Yeah. I mean, let's just completely eradicate from the internet everything that he's done. The thing with this is I'm not saying people aren't deserve second chances or they can't ever build a better life. If Colton has genuinely sought the help that he needs, I'm happy for him. But at the same time, the fact that he is given such public opportunities in spite of all this is where I have a problem with it. I'm not saying people are, you're irreparable and you can't make it out of like a dark hole. I hope for Colton's sake and his husband's sake and their child's sake, he has made it out of this dark hole.

1:08:14But that doesn't mean he should be granted any kind of public endeavors like he has been. That to me is unacceptable. Exactly. It's like, it's not just him. It's these reality TV execs that keep pushing him on us. Yes. No one's asking for this. No one's asking for it. Who is a Colton under? I mean, I guess there are 1.8 million, But it's like, yeah, what? It's just so confounding to me. Yeah. As for the present day, like we said, he has been cast in season four of The Traitors. And this was a very controversial casting decision along with Michael Rappaport. You are not happy about this because The Traitors is like huge.

1:08:57It is like such a vehicle. Look at Gabby Wendy. It's such a vehicle for people to, for ex-reality stars to become super relevant again and become part of the cultural zeitgeist. Look at Dylan Efron. He's on Dancing with the Stars. So it's like, oh my God, we are once again giving him this massive opportunity instead of giving it to someone else who is actually deserving, not someone who traumatized their ex-girlfriend. He also, like I said, is hosting Are You My First on Hulu alongside Caitlin Bristow. Oh my God, you guys. And honestly, fuck Caitlin Bristow for even partnering with this man. Yeah, it makes me side-eye.

1:09:37I mean, we have a Caitlin Bristow episode if you guys need other reasons to side-eye Caitlin Bristow. She has a lot of facepalm-worthy moments that we have discussed. But yeah, this makes me side-eye her also. It's like, what are you doing? Signing onto this in tandem. Like, she doesn't need this. No, her podcast is incredibly successful and she's earning a lot of money from that. this is just a stupid project that in fact dilutes and waters down your brand. Yeah, exactly. This is not a good, who is her team telling her that this is a good idea just because you can be on a random show that no one's watching.

1:10:13You're not hosting Love Island. This is not a show anyone cares about. This is not worth it. The juice is not worth the squeeze. And actually, Abby Montiel from Daily Beast wrote a review about RE My First. It hasn't gotten good reviews. Clearly, no one is really talking about it. We didn't even know it was out. All 10 episodes released August 18th. And there are so many, like I said, I watched like the first 20 or 30 minutes of the pilot, and there are so many virginity puns, obviously. But Abby writes for the Daily Beautyist, our host cheeky double entendres don't change the fact that there's a smarmy conservatism embedded in Are You My First Basic Premise.

1:10:51It quickly becomes clear that the shows concept of virginity is a heteronormative one centered on penetrative penis and vagina sex. One woman recalls an unfortunate fingering incident the years before, and another guy is shocked to find out that his bro hasn't at least quote unquote gotten head. Our society at large might perpetuate this idea, but that doesn't change the fact that at the end of the day, virginity is a myth. In reality, there is no single definition of sex, and some people simply aren't interested in it. Asexuality. Oh, my God. And they bring up Colton's restraining order, thankfully.

1:11:24Let's not forget, you guys. Underwood, whose Bachelor winner Cassie Randolph filed a temporary restraining order against him in 2020 for alleged stalking and harassment, has been open about how his own self-proclaimed virginity stemmed from religious trauma that prevented him from coming out as gay for years. Putting aside his thorny past, why is he so eager to host a show obsessed with gamifying straight sex in the first place? Yeah. how does how does this have well i guess the the virgin element is why they probably nudged him but still still it's just so disgusting so gross like we said caitlin bristow why are you doing this colton underwood go away please and if you're following colton underwood i'm curious as to why does he what is his content i don't follow him so i have no idea what he's doing as an influencer or what his career is, nor do I care to even see, but just curious.

1:12:16No, I know. Let us know, you guys, if there are any Colton Underwood fans, I don't know what you guys call yourselves. Carpenters? No, no. I just keep, because that's what Sabrina Carpenter fans call themselves. So like now I just call every fan base that I don't know the name of Carpenters. Yeah, it's stupid. But yeah, it's so confusing why reality TV execs still keep doing this to us. I just, what am I missing? Let us know, you guys, if we're missing something. If there's something about Colton that you love and we're just not, it's not clocking to us, let us know. Cassie, for her part, got her happily ever after with Brighton Reinhardt.

1:12:57What a name, by the way. Who is the ex that I'm obsessed with in some of those text messages? Good for Cassie. Good for Brighton I'm glad that they have escaped Colton's wrath yeah and talk about how Colton was claiming Cassie was only in it for fame Cassie was so quiet after her exit from the Bachelor franchise after her and Colton broke up you never heard about her really she was just kind of she wanted to do her own thing and I respected that and it just shows that Colton really was the thirst monster all along. Not Cassie. Yeah. Well, yeah, it's like compare it to people from that season, including like Hannah Godwin, Tayshia, Kaylin, who are everywhere to this day.

1:13:45Yes. And not there's anything wrong with that. They're capitalizing on becoming reality stars. But compared to them, Cassie has stayed so under the radar and so low key. She probably do you know what? I bet you she is probably so trauma there's I'm not saying this is the only reason but I bet you she sustained so much trauma from this relationship with Colton and the public scrutiny that this whole circus had that she just preferred to just stay out of the spotlight altogether she was probably like I don't want anything to do with my name out in the public and the media I just want to live a very quiet life with my family and with my fiance and good for her she's always been a queen I don't know I've always just really liked her so you liked her when you watched Colton season yeah she just seemed really normal.

1:14:30Like you would go to high school with her. She was like a normal girl who was just laid back and cool. I don't know. I didn't have anything bad to say about her when watching her, though. I didn't like Kaylin, who was her best friend on the season. Kaylin always gave me a bad feeling, but I don't know. So many Kaylins. Like, why are there so many Kaylins? Yeah, I know. Anyway, you guys, that about wraps up our Colton Underwood episode. God, what a piece of shit he is. Yeah, thank you so much for walking us through this. I knew all about it back in 2020, 2021, but it's crazy to be reminded of this because hearing you read off these texts were incredibly unsettling, but it's good that we're spreading awareness about why you shouldn't watch Colton's shows or endeavors or anything.

1:15:14But how am I supposed to boycott The Traitor Season 4? Oh, God, I know that's really gonna be tough. I can't not watch the traitor season four and that's something we'll have to live with but i think that can be acceptable because he's part of an ensemble cast yeah like i'm not watching for him obviously of course yeah you guys thank you so much for listening if you guys want more of us patreon.com slash snarkbait pod yesterday we did an episode on the netflix documentary unknown number like we mentioned earlier next week we're doing a deep dive on a very popular workout fitness studio that you guys have probably taken.

1:15:53And we have a really much requested deep dive coming next Thursday. I'm so excited. Yes. Oh, by the way, Colton was also on The Masked Singer last year. So once again, yeah, he's a professional reality star. Oh my God, I can't. Okay, sorry. So you guys know where to find us. We're at snarkbaitpod on Instagram. Sophie is at soap underscore Ross. I'm at christynoelle underscore underscore. score. Thank you to Jordan, our producer, Rachel, our social manager, and Olivia, our researcher. And we'll see you guys either on Tuesday for Dark Energy Tuesday, Patreon, Instagram, wherever you find us. Thank you guys so much for listening.

1:16:35Bye. Bye.

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