Caitie Delaney Slept in a Coffin

22:55I'm very interested in that world of comedy that you started to work in because that kind of fan base is a very particular place that has such intense, dedicated fans that they do start to think like, well, I could write this. I know this very well. I'm just as good at this as they are. I know the characters so well. It's a very bought in fan base that has its own peculiarities and interesting little pieces. Yeah. That's where you really cut your teeth on writing comedy, right? Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. I don't really think about it that I still struggle to accept that I write comedy that's my job oh thank you so much I was hoping for that maybe I'm happy to provide it yeah I just yeah I really like it but I guess I'm still suffering from imposter syndrome to this day someday soon someone's going to figure out that I'm not supposed to be here and I better just collect until they realize Yeah, I'm raking it in until then.

23:53Yeah, that's scary. I hate that feeling for you, though, because you are so good at it. Thank you. That's very nice. And we've gotten to work together on stuff. Ugh. We wrote a... We spent years developing a show together. We did. Called Best Buds. It was a cartoon. How come it never happened? Well, it went multiple places. I mean, Katie and I developed this show originally for... What was that? Peacock? No. Oh. Try again. Remember, it was for... Quibi? Quibi. Right. Oh! God, what a humiliating industry. Yeah, we developed a show for, what was it? Quibi. Which is short for Quick Byte. Of course.

24:30We developed it for Quibi, and then it didn't obviously happen there because of their imminent failure. And then we developed it for Peacock. No more Quibi. Long time with Peacock. They decided not to make it at Universal. Then we developed, Netflix bought it. Then we developed it for Netflix. So thankfully, we made money off this show quite a bit. But no one ever made it. And you and I truly writing this show laughed so goddamn hard. It was really fun. Katie and I, I will never forget one day we were writing and we just worked so well together. Like I really enjoyed writing, like developing that with you.

25:00There was one day where we were writing that my character in the animated show gets so stoned. Oh my God. That he thinks he's moving quickly, but he's moving so slow, climbing a ladder to go up a building. And we were truly like, we really wanted it. We wanted the sequence to go on for like two and a half minutes. It's like half the episode. Truly like him just like. They're like, we got to hurry up. We got to go tell this character this thing. Yeah. And it's like, okay, we'll go tell him. And then just like 30 seconds of like unmoving, still frame, just like them sitting there. I'm so stoned.

25:29And we were crying, laughing, writing this. And we had so many moments like that where we would just be truly like weeping writing these ideas down. A lot of fun. It's really weird that you can do all that. And then people are just like, no, we don't want it. Yeah. We're going in a. What? We're actually. I'm sorry. We fired the whole team that bought this from you, and the new team wants to go family-friendly. Or whatever. Yeah. They changed their mandate overnight. Four quad. Yeah. All of a sudden, you're like, oh, my thing doesn't fit into your deal anymore. It is the weirdest thing, especially when executives, not to go off about executives, tell you what the company is looking for right now.

26:05And it's like, well, we're really looking for our Ted Lasso. And it's like, no, you're not. You're looking for your Ted Lasso now. By the time you find it and you produce your Ted Lasso, and it's like three years in the future, no one fucking wants to see a Ted Lasso anymore you won't make it you can't go with what these people are telling you they're looking for you just have to do the best thing that you can also fuck family friendly media I'm just going to say it fuck that shit fuck you they say we need something that everyone would want to watch fuck everyone I want to make stuff for the people that want to watch me fuck if you don't like me don't tune in bitch Caleb Quad Caleb being happy Caleb being funny Caleb friendly content.

26:44Let's see Caleb friendly programming on the network. And that's what it was really. Yeah. Do you think there's any life left in it? Could we get the engine? I don't know. Maybe. I just remember that when it died at Netflix that our wonderful producers who we both love. Yeah. They're like maybe we could do it live action. And that's when I said I'm out. That to me was like we're trying too hard. Yeah. That to me was the death. Well we didn't hear anything after that so I don't think. Yeah. Well. Yeah. Maybe they tried. I don't have red legs. Everyone else was like, no. Yeah. We also had a really funny character in that show.

27:20He's a 12-step sober recovery guy that runs the liquor store. And we loved him. We really loved him. There was a Hooters-esque restaurant. There was an astrophysicist who was a server at Hooters. That's right. They're all really smart and have their master's degrees. They're all there to pay off their PhDs. Because we're allies. Yeah. We're so funny. And we have the teens who work at the Boost Mobile and no one really knows what happens at Boost Mobile. That's right. Empty store. Empty store. You go in and you're like, what do they do? And they're like, for sure. And you're like, okay. And then they had that door to the back where like every time they open it, it's like a fucking rave going on back there.

27:54And they want to see what's going on. Everyone listening to this being like, great, well that show doesn't exist. Yeah. Stop telling us about your non-existent show. Okay, so you wrote on Rick and Morty. Yeah. And then after that, you've done so much like, what did you just punch up? You just punched up something. Gee. I don't know. I do some punch up. I write jokes. You and I also I think became friends because we were both we both got big on Twitter during a golden era. Twitter when we were big on Twitter was like that was the spot. And you were smart. You left. You're gone now. Oh I left. I'm still in there.

28:32It's horrible. I'm fighting for my life over there. I like you know it's like I look at my follower count and I'm like three of these people are still here and watching and real. It's bad vibes on there. Heyday of our Twitter time, though, you were getting invited to Chance the Rapper's fucking recording session. That's right. That did happen. Like, Katie was like a fucking, an icon of the Twitter golden era. And then I showed up and he was just like, I think he thought I was going to be funnier. And I showed up to Chance's recording studio and I was just very quiet and intimidated and nervous about what to do.

29:09He was very nice, but it was bizarre. And also, I thought I was getting scammed for a second before I met up with him. Because he was so, he just DM'd me. And he's like, you're so funny. I love Rick and Morty. Come to the studio. I was like, what? And he gave me his phone number. I was like, huh? And then that didn't happen. And then it was many months later, I had saved his number in my phone. And I'm just lying on the couch. And my phone lights up. And it's like, Chancellor Rapper is FaceTiming you. And I was like, huh? and I just like didn't know what to do I didn't pick it up and then it hung up and then he texted me and he was like oh I'm sorry I realized that's probably like weird it might be weird to get a FaceTime from me we've like never talked before and he was like I'm at the studio now like you should come just hang out and I was like okay I'm not doing anything sure and then I was about to leave the house and I was like you know what Chance FaceTime me because now I think this is a scam and you're gonna fucking kill me and then he FaceTimed me and it was him and then we went and hung out.

30:05That's so funny. Very strange Twitter used to be so different That's how it was back then If you followed someone Who was doing something interesting and they followed you back It was like in a second's notice We will turn this into a real life hang No problem It was so fun That's how we became friends You and I, we followed each other I think you were brilliant, I thought you were brilliant And I was like we gotta be friends And I loved your jokes And then we are I remember what made me fall in love with you The video Sugar, tell them. Tell our story, Shug. The video where I was like, this guy's fucking hilarious, is when you're listening to your friend tell a story and you're trying to interject.

30:51Dude, give him a little taste of it. When you're affirming a friend who's clearly in the wrong. Yes. That was the big viral. Yes. That was one of the ones. But it was the one where you're saying like, but if you, yeah. Right. Right. Right. And if she, yeah. No, I would say in a career, you have to have many breaks. That was my first big break. That was bigger. Earlier that year, that was 2019. Earlier that year, I had screen tested for SNL. And this was bigger than that. I mean, this was like, this was like people, because a bunch of funny people and cool people making stuff like you saw it and were like, oh, maybe this guy's funny.

31:29That was big. That video was big for me. my big video never live it down is the fat joe engineer video do you guys ever see this it was Katie pretending to be the sound engineer for a fat joe song and he goes turn the fucking mic on and she goes it's on

31:49it still comes up a lot it's so funny and it's that type of thing do you have this feeling when like everyone thinks something you've done is really funny where you start to be like it's not that funny Yeah, you start to go, God, with this. And then as soon as people really liked it, I felt like, okay, I have to keep doing this. And there's plenty of songs that have the same sort of like, you know, especially like a rapper, like saying some shit at the beginning of the track that you can react to. But the more I tried to do it, I was like, what am I doing? This is not, I got to find something else.

32:18Yeah, you're chasing the dragon. Yeah. Yeah. I don't like when people think I'm that funny. Yeah. It's like, I want to tell them like, okay. I do. When people think I'm that funny, I go, yeah. Yes. you're right. No, I do. When they latch onto one specific... I want them to think I'm holistically funny. I want them to think that each new thing I do is funnier than the last. So when they hang on to an old one for too long, I'm like, come on! Yeah, I've got other stuff. I've got other stuff, man. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, really. That's kind of my one thing. That's kind of my one thing. So then, yeah, we met, and then I moved to LA.

32:50We were mutuals for a bit. Did we meet when I moved to LA? That's right. During the pandemic. Yeah, during the pandemi. I don't think we met before that. we would meet up at the Krispy Kreme we met up at the Krispy Kreme oh yeah we would eat Krispy Kreme on the hood of my car in Burbank isn't that so sweet LA pandemic was like wholesome and nightmarish it was really cute because everyone was finding these old school ways to connect you guys want to go sit around the fire but it was also like blooming disasters all around it felt very dystopic movie yeah pandemic Pandemic. Pandemic. Some say it's still happening.

33:29Well, we'd have to have one of them on. Come on out. Tony. It's Tony Fauci. Mr. Fauci. Mr. Fauci. I'm not calling you doctor. Mr. Fauci. Where is he? Right there. Katie, what's so true to you, dude? Oh, my God. Okay. Should we do a nice one or a mean one? Mean. Yeah. I kind of want to, and I don't know if anyone has gone off about this on your show. stop me if they have. I think that if you use chat GPT you are probably the worst imaginable person you did not believe in the future of humanity, you don't care about other people I think it's pathetic. It's so fucking pathetic. Because what do you mean you need it?

34:14You don't need it. You didn't need it a year and a half ago to make dinner and all of a sudden you can't figure out what to do with chicken and carrots. Google it! Knock it off, bitch. I hate the AI stuff. I hate it so much. I hate that people are like, well, it helps me with my email so it frees me up to do other stuff and yet you're doing nothing remarkable with the other time. Scrolling TikTok. Knock it off. Scrolling TikTok. I hate the AI stuff. I'm so sick of it. I'm tired of watching smart competent people act so fucking dumb about everything. Well, it's just easier. Well, you're smart. The defense too is that they're like, it's not going anywhere so I'm just going to use it.

34:49It's like okay, you want to be on the front lines of like the downfall of humanity. Like you're not, and also like you're not preparing, like you using chat GPT now does not make you any more equipped. Like everyone knows how to use it. Yeah. It's not some skill that you're acquiring to like be ready. Because you drew into it and then it tells you what you want to hear. It's so fucking, and it's the thing, like people wonder why I'm really like on my high horse about specifically chat GPT, but to me it's like the most harmful in so many different ways thing that you do not need to use at all. There is no good use for it.

35:24However, every time you use it, a bottle of water is fresh water that we need. We're like running out of that imminently. We low-key need that. Gone. Yeah.

35:36It's going to take our jobs. Yeah. Every time you speak to it, it learns from you and learns to emulate you and will take jobs from you. Every customer service job, gone. Yeah. Because you're fucking chatting with ChatGPT all the time. Because you didn't want to write an email at work. Here's another thing. I'll give a so true for the episode. People with email jobs, you're fine. These people act like, okay, here's my so true for the episode. If it is nine o 'clock at a hangout on a weeknight and you have an email job, you don't get to say you have to get to bed. You're going to be fine tomorrow.

36:06You're going to be fine tomorrow. You type emails for a living and fuck around in Excel sheets, you're fine. people with computer jobs acting like they are like going to war you have the easiest existence in the history of the world you can stay out late on a weeknight it's the whole reason you we used to want office jobs so that we could have more fun lives yeah you used to want an office job to be like oh i can fucking go out and have fun all i have to do tomorrow is an office job i'm not roughing houses and now you're saying what's the attitude of of office worker i'm saying so many people i know that have computer jobs like oh we got to turn in i've got work tomorrow your job is fake and then now on top of having a fake job they're using chat gpt to write the fake emails yeah you do nothing and they will be laid off in six months and that part is sad is it though they're contributing to it I want you to keep your fake job I know I want you to keep your fake job so that we can hang out but people are being boring and furthermore I have a second so true say it now okay you know those like delivery robots that are going all over the place kick them over fuck those fucking things one cut me off the other day one cut me off the other day I was driving and it pulled out on the sidewalk in front of me and I literally went, hey man.

37:13I'm talking to him like he's real. Well, that's the problem. I know. We've been primed. I'm part of the problem. I've seen a lot of videos on TikTok of people feeling sad because the little robot can't get across the street and he's so scared and he can't get over. No, fucking kick back over and kill him. Put a big magnet next to him and kill him. Because he has taken someone's job. Not a great job, delivery, driving, but it is taking wages from people. and I do feel like Pixar and whoever else has been humanizing robots for so long so that when we got to this point where they are taking our jobs we're like oh my god that delivery robot is so cute it is sad to watch him have eyeballs and try to cross the street they're doing something to us and we're wrong it has worked on me and I'm like what the fuck am I feeling like this for?

37:53this should be a human being take his eyes away take off his name tag they have a little name tag if you see a delivery robot, take his eyes away and take his name tag. Spray paint his eyes and take his name tag. We cannot see him as real. He's nobody. He's nobody. He's a thing. He's a robot. He's nothing. He's an it. You know people are calling robots clankers now? Yeah. Which is so, whoever came up with clankers, like, good job. It sounds so like a slur. It's nice to say. Yeah, it does sound like a slur. Which I love to say. It actually feels good and I think it's like as white people, it's nice to have a slur that we can safely participate in.

38:31Thank God. I've been waiting. It's good to be, let's get all the racist white people and be like, look, here's one you can do. Clankers, clankers. Yeah, run with this one. Run with this one. Leave real people of color alone. Run with this one. This is good. Let's radicalize. You should hate those things. Yeah, it's like, this is good. Like, I don't want these clankers taking my jobs. It's like, that's nice. Exactly. Do say that. Yeah. Take his eyes. Anyway, fuck ChadGBT. Fuck ChadGBT. And fuck you if you use it. You're stupid. You're destroying the environment. You're making yourself dumber. All of these kids are now going to college and not even learning they're going straight to chat gpt professors are using it now my dad is a college professor yeah and i've been talking to him about it and he has gotten to the point he'll tell me like the assignments that he gives to his students this one recently he was like i i sent a nine page article to my students and i asked them to read it and i said if you don't finish it just email me and tell me why you couldn't finish it that is like the assignment yeah he knows that kids can't even read a nine page article and all he wants is for you to say at what point you stopped reading because you were so fucking bored you couldn't get through it yeah and why and maybe explore that yeah he is at the end of his rope this man is trying to hold the education system together by a thread and he just knows like there's nothing to do he uses those ai detector he doesn't use chat gpt but he uses the detectors yeah and i think a lot of his students try to convince him that they're not using chat GPT.

39:57And he's like, dog, yeah, you are. I just want to ask all these people, what do you want out of your life? Exactly. What would you like your time on earth to be about? Is everything... Everything's time-saving. Is expedience the god that you really want to worship at? Is everything supposed to be so fucking easy? Do you really want to spend your whole time on earth never doing a single challenging thing to your mind and just fucking drool over a fucking slop bowl with chat GPT telling you what you should write to your friend who you want to see? That actually sounds kind of sick. Of course that's nice.

40:25Of course that's nice. Slap bowl? What's in it? I just had one. I'm saying like of course there's parts of this that are cool but do you want to spend every minute of your life doing nothing for real actually? That's crazy. I know. There's no more thirst for knowledge. Don't you think? I was giving you a pause because I thought you were going into something more but no you're right. No straight up. The thirst for knowledge is gone. Say that. I just said it. We start crying. We start sobbing during this. the thirst for knowledge is gone I want people to want to do anything you ever seen the breakup 2006 you love that movie I do really love it too what are you going to say about it well just Vince Vaughn goes why would I want to do the dishes and she goes I want you to want to do the dishes because you know I need help and it's a really great argument one of the all time great film arguments in the breakup 2006 is that the same argument as he was supposed to bring 12 lemons and he brought like 2 it starts with the lemons yeah there's a really funny joke in the breakup where she asked him for 12 lemons and he brings three or whatever.

41:26And she goes, you brought three lemons. And he's like playing video games. And he goes, yeah, my baby wants lemons. My baby gets lemons. But baby wanted 12. Baby wanted 12. Yeah. God, what a great movie. It's a really good movie. Really great movie. One of the all time great fights. And some really funny scenes in there. You guys should all go watch it. Should we remake it? Yeah. You want to star? Yeah, do you want to star? Yeah. We're in it together. You're Jen, I'm Vince. Is that believable? we were together and now we're breaking up yeah I think my character will have to have a secret but yeah layer we'll layer in some secrets his buddies he plays pool with it's not all they do but yeah this is interesting this is nice to think about we gotta make a movie together what's your favorite movie of all time that thing you do do you like that movie?

42:15who's in? well it's Tom Hanks written directed starring He's not really the star. He's a co-star. You know, it's about a band, like a one-hit wonder band. Who stars? You got Tom Hayden Scott. Is that his name? Thomas Hayden Church? No. Tom Everett Scott. Tom Everett Scott. Whoa. Okay. You got Steve Zahn. You got Ethan Embry. Don't know. And you got the fourth guy. I know Ethan Embry. He was in Sweet Home Alabama. That's right. Nice. And who's the fourth guy? Some guy. Got it. He did a great job. Got it. Yeah, he killed it. I don't really know anything else. He's watching this like, God damn it.

42:49He's a huge fan of So True. He's like, fuck! He throws his popcorn at the TV. It's a great movie, though. You have to watch it. It has everything. It has romance. It has great. It has that one really good song. Jonathan Shake? Is that who you were thinking of? How do you even say your name, dog? Jonathan Demme? Also, Jonathan spelled with an H. Paul Feig plays a... Is that the dad from Girls? Hang on. Damn, this is a cast. Yeah. Oh my god, Giovanni Ribisi. Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. What a cast. This is a hell of a... Clint Howard's in this thing? Good night. It's really good. Takes place in the 60s. You got Charlize Theron in there.

43:29Yeah. You got to watch the director's cut. Damn, I got to get into it. So that's your favorite movie, huh? Yeah. Wow. It's just so funny and wholesome and charming. What do you think of Tom Hanks? Is he as wholesome as we believe? Cut the cameras. What do you make of this Tom, fellas? Is he the guy behind the scenes? You know stuff? You remember when him and Rita got COVID? That shook the world. It did. They were the first people to ever get COVID. Shocked the world. In Australia, if I'm not mistaken. We said, not America's first lady. Yeah, that's when people started taking it seriously. Yeah.

44:02But they were fine. They were totally fine, and they're going to be fine. What do you think of Tom Hanks? Good guy. Good guy, I think. Love him. Love him. Tom Hanks has a gun to my head off. No, I imagine if I ever found out that Tom Hanks wasn't what we believe him to be, I would just be so heartbroken. It just seems more likely that he's not. No, no, no. That he's not what we think he is. Don't you think? Oh, jeez. You think? Everyone it. That sucks. Well, I also hate, though, that we've made him be something. Yeah. We make him be Tom Hanks. Yeah, I think maybe he doesn't even want to be Tom Hanks.

44:36He does not want to have this. He's like, no, I'm kind of an asshole. I'm like a regular guy. Yeah. Do you have a Tom Hanks impression? Oh, you know. Oh, I heard it. Woody. Or something like that, maybe? Will you do your Margot Martindale impression for us? It's my favorite thing about you. Well, you love two impressions of mine. Katie and I, a big part of Katie and I's friendship is sending each other voice memos and character. You send them to me. And then I try to do them and I get nervous and I don't send them. Well, she wants me to send her voice notes. I'm happy to send her voice notes. Honey, you made a big mistake.

45:13That's Margot Martindale. You make me laugh so much. If I had on a big wig, you could see it. she's a floozy she always like carries that I have a video of you in London where you're like you're in my room and you're looking outside out the window and you're like I wanna go outside but I don't wanna be hot it's too damn hot out there it's too hot I don't wanna be hot in it my other favorite bit is I'll send Katie like a seven minute voice memo just being like just being like apropos of nothing we won't be talking right and I'll be like that's the important part It was 1994 when I moved to Los Angeles, and I was having lunch at, I guess it was the Beverly Wilshire Hotel.

45:59And of course, my compatriot, Katie Delaney, was there, and she was writing a script for the television program, Rick and Morty. I'll do this for like seven minutes. The thing you always add, did you just say it? You always say, I was living in Los Angeles at the time. It's true, you are living all over the place. I was living in Los Angeles at the time, and all the stars were out as it were. And I'll just do that for so long. So fucking funny. And I'll just get back a three-second voice note from Katie going, ha-ha! And a better action. I have them all saved but also they gotta fix this saving the voice memo thing they don't even give me the option they don't give me keep all the time keep doesn't pop up right away so you gotta just stare at it until keep pops up but then after you've kept where does it go?

46:52you just have to scroll scroll scroll forever until you find it, you should go into a folder and then you can listen to all of them they don't do that so if I want to find your voice memos from four years ago it's not gonna happen what's the most do you have any voicemails or voice memos saved on your phone that you think about a lot i have a sad one i want my my my dad my dad left me a voicemail uh like 14 hours before he died we think we don't for sure know when he died what'd he say uh he was just like i mean it's kind of funny but he was like he was like hey buddy just want to be the one to tell you i was in the hospital i don't think anything's wrong but damn he's like yeah i guess i got emphysema i thought I quit smoking soon enough, but I guess not.

47:36Anyway, I'll be fine. I love you. And it's just like a, but it's sad, of course, because, you know, he goes on to die pretty quick. But do you listen to it? I've listened to it probably like a handful of times since he died. I listened to it a couple of times when I was writing the script about him. And I've listened to it a couple of times since then. Just like I got a new phone and I listened to it one time before I switched phones just to make sure that if anything were to happen for any reason that I would have heard it, you know? Yeah. And then it went over. So it was fine. So, but yeah, I listen to it sometimes.

48:01Yeah. It's really sweet. I'm really glad I have it. Yeah. I'm really glad I had the thought to save it. Yeah. I have a bunch of my Nana's voicemails from before she died. I don't really listen to them ever, but they're there. Yeah. Well, it's a weird, like, when in the middle of a day are you going to sit down and be like, all right, now. So you're my dead dad's voice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a weird thing to conjure up. But I have some funny ones, too, I'm sure. But that's the one I think of. But you don't know because there's nowhere to go. No localized place on your phone, a folder to go and listen to them.

48:29You need to create this. Tim Cook. Tim Cook? listen to me sir get it done Tim Apple Cook Mr. Tim, Mr. Apple can I ask you how you feel being perceived in this way by so many people all the time I wonder if anyone wants to hear it but yes you can, I've talked about it plenty on this show I think I feel insane I feel insane you're making me feel very comfortable I feel good but then when I start to think about like people will watch this conversation between the two of us and and form opinions about me yeah i think they'll form nice i don't think i'm interested i think yeah it's tough it's tough uh being a publicly commented on entity of any size or regard and you've experienced that but like a little bit not nearly as much as you it's a weird it's weird it's weird i don't know what's the percentage do you have like a lot of negative stuff coming at you virginia would be the better person to ask she runs you delete them she deletes good okay yeah when was it a lot um i think earlier when the podcast was yeah who the fuck is this guy yeah i i don't i try not to read too much of it i try not to have i've described it as a portal to the soul ziway and i talked about this recently where i'm like if you let the good in you have to let the bad in as well and i'm just as soon leave it out altogether and i'll just take my my notes about me from the people who actually know me and love me i think that'll be a perfectly fine way to do it and it's cool that strangers like my work i hope that people laugh yeah i've been doing a lot of press for the hbo special this morning i did like four phone interviews in a row and i was reflecting a little bit on like you know they're like what do you want people to get from the special i'm like i just want people to laugh yeah i would love to make people laugh and after that whether you think i'm a good person or you have a bad person or you think i'm fucking annoying or you think i'm the coolest or you want to be my friend or you want me to die or whatever that none of that is my business i hope you laugh and if you don't please keep it to yourself and i'm out of it you know what i mean i'm just stay out of it it's extremely evolved of you thanks dude i've had i'm i feel very lucky that it's gone slowly you know yeah i have not really had overnight success well earned i don't mean overnight sounds like you haven't earned it and it's just like happened in front of you yeah i think it's happened quickly as it should things are escalating very quickly right now but But I think I've had a long, like, I had a moderate-sized Twitter following many years ago.

50:55And that was the beginning of it, you know? And then I was in this thing or this thing. And I had this job and this exposure to the internet. And I think I've gotten to, like, dip my toes a little bit along the way. What I feel like has happened is that I have walked slowly into a body of water up to my knees. And then I, in the last two years, fell off a ledge. And now I'm fully submerged in it. But I got to walk slowly, at least. And there's sharks. and they're executives. And they all want to take a bite. Yeah. I did learn from a friend yesterday that she knows an entertainment exec who's using ChatGPT to give notes on scripts.

51:33Shut the fuck up. Yeah. And that made me, I was like, please give me their name. I want to. Did you get the name? No, but I was like, please tell me so I can never work with that person. That makes me sick. And she wouldn't tell me because she's a good friend to her friend. But I was like, that is, That is, if you are an entertainment exec and you are using chat GPT for anything, you must quit and go do something else. I'm begging you to get out of this. This industry is already so fraught. I'm begging you to go do something else. You clearly don't care about this. Well, what part of the job do you think they just like going to dinner?

52:08What do you like about this if you're not doing that? Yeah, reading scripts is probably the most fun they could possibly have doing their job. No, I imagine that what a lot of people like about this work is adjacency to power and relevance. Right. Yeah. Going to dinner. Going to dinner. With, um. Freaking Charlize Theron. Or something like that. Well, we love her. I would love to go to dinner with her. Freaking Charlize Theron or something like that. That sounds lovely. Matt Reif. Matt Reif. Oh, I had a dinner with Matt Reif. I was at dinner with Matt Reif. And I believe, who was it that joined?

52:39It was Charlize Theron. Of course we were at San Vicente Bungalows in Los Angeles And um Katie popped by She was doing slide of hand magic For the table Damn Hell yeah Someone put me in a Truman Capote funny biopic We did Capote serious Let's do the silly one You know Truman Capote was going to drag bars in Kansas City Back in the day When he was writing in Cold Blood he would go into Kansas City And go to the drag shows Just hang. Yeah, and you'd be like, I'm doing your dance. Or whatever. So demanding. Dance for me.

53:22Katie, time for a segment. You know what it is. You've seen the show. I have. Okay. Every week. No, I do know what it is. Are you okay? He's doing physical bits.

53:39Katie. I'm going to read you 15 statements. You're going to tell me as quickly as you can if you think that what I just said is true or false. If you get 10 or more correct, we're going to give you 50 US dollars. Really? Yes. Really. Okay. That's cab fare. Okay. Ready? Yeah. Quick as you can. World of Warcraft debuted in 1999. True. False. 2004. Giraffes are excellent swimmers. False. False. They cannot swim. Florida has a larger population than Greece. True. True. Angelina Jolie is six foot tall. False. False. She's 5 '7". The current president of St. Michael's College is William Eck. That's where I went to college.

54:15False. False. Richard Plum. A group of jellyfishes called a school. False. False. It's a smack. Fall River, Massachusetts, its town motto is, we'll try. True. True. There are more Taco Bells in America than subways. More Taco Bells than subways. True. False. Fuck. No word in the English language rhymes with month. False. True. In South Korea, a baby is considered one year old at birth. True. True. Skunks are marsupials. True. False. Fuck. There are no Apple stores in Arkansas. True. False. There's one in Little Rock, darling. Jennifer Coolidge was born in Boston. True. True. Glee never won an Emmy.

54:57False. False at 1-6. A pigeon's feathers are heavier than its bones. True. True. How'd she do? 10! Where's my$50? Well, I'll talk about it. Venmo, cash. We'll talk about it. We'll talk about it off camera. Shoot. Okay. So what else was I going to ask you? Katie. Yeah. You know what I asked a friend the other day and it was really lovely. And we don't have to talk about this if you don't want to. It depends on what the answer brings up. I was at dinner with a friend. I was at dinner with a friend and I asked like, who's someone that you haven't, that you don't talk to much anymore that you just really love from afar?

55:33Like somebody that you're like, oh, we haven't talked in a while, but I really love that person and I'm wishing them well. You. Genuinely. Yes. We don't talk a ton. We're bad at it. But you're just like doing so great out there. And I just, it feels like we talk a lot because I'm just so engaged with your socials. Your socials? I'm just all over the socials. I'm commenting. I'm just watching your presence. So, yeah, you. That's sweet. Like most of my friends, I have a lot of like day-to-day like see them all the time, multiple times a week friends. Those are like my friends. I have many friends that I hope are doing well.

56:08None are coming to mind right now. yeah I'm not thinking about them no yeah I don't know I just thought it was kind of interesting it is sweet that you see me though I do feel that way about you I'm regularly okay at keeping in touch okay to bad and this year have been bad I've been bad at keeping in touch I'm not great at it either though and I think you're the type of friend that when I see you we're just like back to it's not like oh fuck like we're not going to remember what each other is like if we don't talk every couple weeks or something like that we'll just get together when we get together you're in my dreams you're in my dreams and my prayers what are you praying for for me for you yeah what do you want for me the same thing I want for all peoples peace happiness prosperity love warmth connection connection above all connection is God I would love to see you connect with others me the universe yourself I think I'm doing it yeah because you've been praying I think you're connecting I've been praying I pray for your I pray for your uprising I do not pray for I do not pray for your downfall Thank you so much I pray for your rise Someone's praying for it I pray on your rise Thank you so much I pray on your escalation I don't pray but if I did You don't need my prayers You're doing so good You pray Katie Whether you know it or not I pray with my canvas and a paintbrush That's what I'm saying Yeah You're praying You know what It was a prayer that you walked in here today Hey It's an answer to a prayer God is good all the time.

57:34All the time. Let the church say amen. Amen. Well, Katie.

57:44I became a Christian in 2025 after doing a podcast recording with Katie Delaney. She was doing sleight of hand magic.

57:58Katie, I love you so much. I love you. Is there anything you want to tell the people about? anything you want to plug oh my god don't follow me on twitter that's over off there yeah hit me on instagram uh grab my sub stack which i'm starting i'm trying to move over yeah let's go we're trying to move from twitter over to sub stack yeah i really want to um work with more like this is so stupid no it's not work with more long form writing hello i haven't written anything longer than a tweet well i write for my job but but um i want to explore the thoughts in a more long form way. I'll be sharing my I paint, I'll share my paintings and my ceramics and my getting into quilting.

58:40It's going to be like a hobbyist fun thoughts getting through the horrible times sort of sub stack I think is what I'm looking to do. I love it. I love your fun thoughts. I have one of your gorgeous paintings hanging in my apartment. Which one? Oh, you have the little cottages with the station wagon in front. You have that one, right? Yes. Yeah, and I love that one. Well we just love you Thanks for being here I love you so much Thank you That was a HeadGum Podcast