Devon Walker Returns

20:45But it's in my heart now. I learned about dynamic stretching recently. Sure. You know? And that's where I learned that you're supposed to do that before a workout. Okay. Where you're kind of bouncing in the stretch a little bit. Not too much. But where you're kind of doing movements in the stretch. Wow. Static stretching is for when you're done. That's for the cool down. Now, I've been doing stretching all wrong, if at all. Yeah. And I need to get into it. I want to get into yoga. I'm scared of Pilates. I don't think I can enter those spaces. That's a lot. But yoga, I need to speak with Adrienne.

21:13You can get involved. Yeah. I need to speak with Adrienne. I've heard she's doing good things. You could get involved. You know what a really nice time to get into yoga is? On a vacation. Really? Yeah. Do a little, because it's like you're in a different environment. You're somewhere new. Pop on one of them YouTube videos. Yeah. Pop on one of them YouTube videos. Hit one of them poses. Yeah. Feels good. You know, earlier you were talking about girls not wanting you to order meat lovers pizza. Yeah. And I keep thinking about, I never feel more distant from my girls than at dinner. Speak on that.

21:39Because my girls will be like, why don't you come over for dinner? I'll make us something. I'll go, okay. And then I'll go over. And their idea, and I love girls. You know that. Girls are my whole life. Sure. Girls mean everything to me. Girls pay my bills. They're the whole reason that we're sitting in here right now. I want to thank you to girls. Thank you, girls. That being said, a girl's idea of dinner is butter noodles. That pisses me off. Yeah. What the fuck are you talking about? I hear what you're saying. I don't like that. I hear what you're saying. And they're like, girl dinner, girl dinner.

22:05I'm like, first of all, that's a snack. Second of all, don't make me be involved in it. Yeah. It can be tough sometimes when you're with certain homegirls and you realize, especially with your homegirls who are on TV, your homegirls who are on TV, they're really not trying to eat what you and I would probably consider a meal. No. And I understand the pressures and where that's coming from. Yeah. But it's also like, I'm trying to get the spinach dip. It's like the only reason I want to dismantle misogyny. It's so that I can go out with my girls and have a regular meal. You know what I'm saying?

22:33I'm like, I want to get the spinach dip and I want to eat it together. Yeah. And now we've established a situation where you're like, oh, no, no, no. Because of society, you're like, I'm not touching the spinach dip. And I'm like, I don't want to eat it by myself. I really wronged a fat friend recently. Speak on it. I was in Los Angeles retirement community for young people. Yeah. And I went out with my friend and we ordered the guacamole. And I did ask for the chips to be replaced with vegetables. you die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain interesting i couldn't do it i didn't think we were see i couldn't do it why not because i eat too many of the chips and i can't stop and then i feel so bad yeah it's tough i need you to bring me the carrots it's a it's a whole situation with uh it's a whole situation you're right it's a whole situation with tortilla chips as a texan at like who grew up in places where like that that's just like customary you don't even have to order the chips and the salsa that just sort of comes with it yes once i pop that fun don't stop.

23:26You know what I'm saying? It don't stop. And you bring me carrots, I'm having two and I'm done. Yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. Because a carrot's never really, it's not giving you that rush, it's not giving you that satisfaction. And you know what? I will say, Chili's, Chili's does something nice for fat people. Okay? Fat people who love dips. Sure. Chili's makes their chips really thin. They do. Authentic Mexican places, they're making the chips thick as fuck. So I'm having two chips and it's like, that was half a tortilla. Right. You know, but the thin little Chili's chips, now granted they are covered in salt.

23:54Yeah. Lots of it Of course And the sauces are 3 ,000 calories a piece Don't even think about that That's a different thing Yeah, that's something else I And my fat friend Looked at me like I had Hurt them I'm kind of with them on it I am too I'm kind of with them I didn't like that I had to do it I'm starting to think about shit Yeah My body feels different No, I get it And it does And then when you start Making certain changes You're like, oh, like I actually do feel I feel better Yeah, we had the Guacamole Caleb style I can't wait to learn About other things That are done Caleb style Yeah I'm excited about this.

24:24I'm excited. Everything's a branding exercise. You know, the celebrities, the lesbians, they know what I'm on. I still haven't named my podcast fans. No? No, we're working on it. I really like your podcast. Oh, thank you so much. You low-key accused me of racism when I came on last. I believe it. Yeah. I stand by it. I believe it. Hey, and if you come on the pod, you could get accused of that as well. We'll see what kind of, it really depends on what kind of lyrics you bring me. Yeah. I saw you in Austin, Texas interview at South by Southwest. I saw you interview Randall Park and it was a fucking delight it was an incredible episode that was so fun I was really blown away and impressed by how good he was at being a podcast guest yeah he was awesome he was very prepared I'd never met him before that was literally the first time we'd ever met you guys were electric it was so nice he also like my podcast my favorite lyrics check it out if you can wherever you get your podcasts Randall it's like a rap and music lyrics podcast and Randall writes his own raps, as you saw.

25:21Yeah. And so, like, he came with, like, 32 bars. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? It went on for a long time. It was going on for quite some time. Yeah. Maybe that's part of his 75 Randall, is he, like, writes... 75 Randall! 75 Randall! Yeah. Yes, he writes... That's sick. He writes bars every day. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he must be, because he said them for a long time. He did. He did. And he was also rapping, you know, just based on how somebody raps, you can tell, like, you can tell their age. And I'm saying that not in, like, a derogatory way. I can just say like, you can tell what era they came up in.

25:51You can tell what like sort of inspired, you know, their, their style. And when I was listening to him, I was like, Oh, you're, you were a teenager in the 1990s for sure. Yeah. You were, cause you're rapping like Raekwon right now. Yeah. You're rapping like the Wu-Tang Clan meant a lot to you and you were there as it was happening. Yeah. Cause I had, I was looking back on the Wu-Tang Clan being like, Oh, like, you know, it was like cool to get into that when I was like 16. Yeah. He was clearly, he was there. Nicki Minaj wasn't on the scene when you started. And there is a clear delineation. Sorry to invoke Nikki.

26:21She just changed a lot for a lot of people. Sure. Now we're obviously not listening to her about a lot of things. But to me, there's a really clear moment where Nicki Minaj started rapping and everything shifted in a way. Sure, sure, sure, sure. And Randall wasn't there for that. No. I think if he was, he was looking at it with his arms crossed. You know what I mean? I do think he was present when it was happening, but he was like, these kids in there. Yeah, he was doing that. Yeah. Yeah, he wasn't happy when the BBLs came on the scene.

26:53What's up, you guys? It's Caleb, Gen Z correspondent here. This episode is brought to you by Booking.com. Booking.com offers a wide array of hotels and vacation rentals across the U.S. so you can find exactly what you're booking for.

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29:14Try Domino's Parmesan stuffed crust pizza today. Thank you, Domino's, for sponsoring this episode. Everyone deserves access to high-quality, affordable health care, no matter what. that's why millions of people rely on Planned Parenthood health centers for services like cancer screenings, wellness exams, birth control, STI tests, and more. In fact, one in three women in the U.S. have been to Planned Parenthood for care. So it kind of blows my mind that lawmakers are trying to permanently shut them down. They already passed a law that blocks patients that use Medicaid from getting the affordable preventative care they need, and now they want to make that law permanent.

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30:53to check out in seconds. Simple, secure, fast. That's Apple Pay. Terms apply. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast instead of doom scrolling? Smart move. Another smart move? Getting help from one of State Farm's 19 ,000 local agents when you choose to bundle home and auto. Bundling, just another way to save with the personal price plan. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings, and eligibility vary by state. Sierra has all the best active and outdoor brands for the super athletic stuff, like running gear for cruising up the trail.

31:32Woo! And the super athletic-ish stuff, like fishing gear for chilling by the creek. Nice cast. Fitness apparel to push for higher reps. You got this! And golf balls priced so you can afford to lose one. Or a few. Head to Sierra or Sierra.com for the brands you want at the prices that let you do it all. From athletic to athletic-ish, Sierra's got it. Would you ever get a BBL? Man, what a question. A Devin BL? Honestly, people don't know this because just stylistically we're in a place where all the pants are really big, but I got some cake. Really? Yeah, I got cake. Damn. Yeah, so I feel, you know what I'm saying?

32:16I'm built lower half. I'm built like my mom, so it's like we're set. Shout out to her. Shout out my mama for real Shout out to your mom Shout out to my mom Shout out to your mama as well I hope to meet her one day Shout out to my mom You and my mom will have a very fun time I believe that She seems like a blast My mom is a lot more fun than I am Oh sure Don't Chance laugh too hard at that But yeah But yeah she's a lot of fun I feel like Does your mom drink? Everybody Yeah

32:47He's right about that I asked if Caleb's mom drinks and Chance just goes, oh, does she ever? She would drink a frat house under the table. Oh my God, yeah. We would have a blast. She's a lot of fun. My mom's a party. She's way more fun than I am. She's a blast. Sure, sure, sure, sure. All right. At my last benefit show, she was super drunk in Kansas. She was super drunk in the front row and I gave her the mic for two seconds. And I said, mom, I'm thinking we'll have a cute mother-son moment. I hand her the mic, thinks she'll say something sweet. I go, mom, how you doing tonight? She goes, what's up, bitches?

33:21I said, go ahead and give me it back. Go ahead and give me it back. That's not how we're going to. You think she's going to be like, look at how much runny we raised for the hospital. I thought it was going to be sweet. I thought it was going to be something cute, you know, like a mom thing. All these kids are saved now. What's up, bitches? All right, give it back. Give it back. Mom, mom, mom, mom. Give me the mic. Come on, we can't do that, mama. Yeah. Yeah. She also, yeah, she's doing way too much with my fans. Oh, is your mom online? Oh, she's online. She's meeting my fans out at the bar And taking them back to her house to hang out She's like why don't we continue this back at my place I'm like why don't we not Invite people that you don't know back to the house No please don't do that Yeah really scary stuff If y 'all are listening stop going to Caleb's mama house You're not supposed to be over there Stop You're not supposed to be over there Some of y 'all who are listening Y 'all been to Caleb's mama house Shame on you Stop That's not where you're supposed to be You need to go back to your establishment Hang out with people at your age bracket If you see my mom at a dive bar in Lee's Summit, Missouri You hang out with her there very briefly.

34:19And then you make sure she gets home safe without accompanying her. That's right. She's going back to school right now. For what? She'd get more nurse. What? She's going to become more of a nurse. What? How much more of a nurse can you be? They're going to make her more of a nurse. How many levels of nurse are there? I know there's regular nurse and there's like nurse prac. There's like LPN, RN, there's like BSN, I think. I think she's getting her BSN right now. Uh-huh. And then you could just keep going at nurse forever. They have many, many nurses. This is brand new information to me. Yeah. Nurses can really be different kinds of nurses.

34:48What kind of nurse is she right now? She's an RN. Oh, and she's about to level up nurse-wise. She's about to go BSN mode. Do you want her to retire? Yes. My mom and I, I'm constantly asking her, this is so funny, I've been asking her for like three years, where do you want to go in the world? Like, what do you want to do? I'll take you. What do you want to do? You want to go to Spain for a week? Do you want to like, do you want to go to fucking Tokyo? What do you want to do? And she's always like, I'm happy here. I like it here. I'm like, no. This is, come on, man. Like, you know what I mean? Let's go do stuff.

35:18And then finally, like two months ago, she goes, I've been thinking about your question about what I want to do. And I think maybe we could do 23andMe. And then, which I'm like, God damn it. She's like, we could do 23andMe. And then when we find out where we're from, we could go to there. And I'm like, first of all, we're not going to be from somewhere interesting. Second of all, we're probably going to learn some shit we don't want to know. Sure. Because all white people in the Midwest are like, I think there's some Native American in there. There's something else in there. Okay? And I don't want to be involved with it.

35:50I don't know. So I guess we're going to do 23andMe. Oh, that's not... I don't want to do it. That's not like a trip. I don't want to do it. Well, no, we're going to do it, and then we're going to find out where we're from, and then we're going to go to there. Oh, I see. So it's going to be like, you're 13 % Czechoslovakian, and then I guess we're going to go there. You're going to the Czech Republic? I guess. This is all I can get her to do. Yeah. What do you think is in there? I don't want to know. Yeah. I am scared. We are straight up white people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't think there was no...

36:19You didn't... Because you know, like, some white people have, like, one picture of their grandpa, and he kind of had, like... He had, like, a little texture in his situation. It's not like that. And they'll be like, oh, like... It's not like that for us. Your great-great-great-grandfather was half a slave. Like, that kind of thing. I don't think it's going to happen. I think best case scenario. Yeah. Best case. We find out that there was... Way back, maybe we're from some cool white people who did some cool stuff. Oh, sure, sure, sure, sure. Who were maybe, like... Maybe they were some of the white people that were like, we're not really down with everything that's going on.

36:45Oh, they were fighting back against what was going on. That's best case. That's what you have to hope. Biggest case, we find out we were involved. Yeah.

36:57In the stuff. Yeah, biggest case, y 'all were leading the charge on some of the stuff. Biggest case, we were innovating in the space. Yeah. Yeah. Sir Archibald Heron was on one of the first ships over, and guess who came with him? Yeah. Yeah, he wasn't doing stuff alone. A lot of guys, and they were not his friends and family. This is a guy who looked just like him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's going to be like my exact face, but he's got like a mustache. Like fucking Forrest Gump. Yeah, he's got a mustache, and he's got like an African that he's grabbing by the wrist.

37:33Just out of frame. By the wrist. By the wrist. That was slavery. He was like, get over here. Come on. Devin, come on. Do you remember that in Forrest Gump when they randomly decided to make his family the Klan? No. Do you remember that? There's so many little pockets. Because, like, I saw Forrest Gump a lot of times, but I feel like I mainly saw it from it being on TV. And, you know, they condense that version. And so it's like, I feel like they cut out a lot of the stuff that's like the thing about his mom fucking the principal. So he could, like, get into school. Yeah. Which also, I was talking to my buddy about this.

38:07And my buddy was like, yeah, it's really funny because the school that his mom, like, fucks the principal for him to get into is a public school. Yeah. You didn't need admission. Crazy. Crazy. You didn't need admission. You didn't have to. So it's like she just kind of, I don't know. I very specifically remember seeing Forrest Gump for the first time as a kid and being really confused when she was talking to that guy. Yeah. And he was like, yeah, Mr. Gump, Ms. Gump. And I was like, why did he say it like that? I remember watching as a kid being like, why the fuck did he say it like that? That was a normal question.

38:36And then when they were doing the screaming sex thing, I didn't know they were having sex. I was like, what the fuck is going on? Sure. But yeah, there's a moment in Forrest Gump where he just, Forrest, I mean, Forrest is so, you know, he doesn't really understand stuff. Right. So he goes like, my great grandpa liked to dress up in sheets and ride horses. It's just like, what? They legitimately do that. You could have, his grandfather could have did anything. Anything. They could have gave him any type of job. He could have been the milkman. Could have been awesome. You know what I'm saying? He could have been doing nice stuff.

39:06He could have been giving back to the community. He could have been going to Native American reservations and teaching classes and stuff like that. Nah. He was in the Klan. Yeah. And then they show old-timey footage of Forrest Gump. It's like Tom Hanks in a mustache, and he pulls down his hood and rides off on a horse. And then they move on in the movie. Yeah. It's crazy. And that's what your fearful love. That's what 23andMe will do to me. In terms of your lineage. Yes. Sure. How long has your family been in Missouri? I don't know. we stay out of that kind of stuff that's when you get into a sticky situation that's when you get into a sticky situation because it's like Missouri I'm scared I already know what was going down over there there were a lot of cool white people in Missouri Devin the border wars and I'm not saying that there weren't a lot of cool white people it's just a real coin flip as to were those your people I know it I'm scared to give the place my saliva I'm praying for you my dad got really into 23andMe 7 or 8 years ago and I was just like, hey, well, so dad, where does this spit go?

40:04And he was like, to the people, the 23andMe people. And I was like, yeah, but. Who owns them? But yeah, I'm like, yeah, who's that tied into? And we never got to the bottom of it and God knows. They probably, who knows what they know about me. Yeah, I'm scared. Yeah, I spit in the thing. You spit in the thing for your dad? I spit in the thing. Hey, yo. Older people are really into this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they do. They like to know their lineage. I think that's in the same way that we're now in our 30s and we're getting into stretching. Yeah. Because we're thinking about the finality of our bodies and stuff like that.

40:34I think there hits a point maybe when you're in your 50s or 60s where you're like, I got to know where I came from. Where'd I come from? Yeah. I know where I'm headed. Exactly. How'd I get here? Exactly. Well, I don't know if I've asked you this before. I forget if we talked about this last time you were on. God, yes or no? What are you doing with God? Great question.

40:53Is this something y 'all talk about on the podcast? Oh, yeah. Oh, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. Oh, yeah. I would say, man, I think I've oscillated. I grew up super, super Christian, which I think you did as well, right? Yeah. Youth group and all that? Oh, yeah. But I never, I didn't really like it. Like, I didn't enjoy, I didn't enjoy the church part of church. Yeah. I liked the part of the church. I don't know if you ever, did you ever go to, like, church summer camp? Of course. Did you ever go to church summer camp? And, like, I kind of was going for the water slides. Yeah. And I was so excited about the water slides.

41:20And they'd be like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Three-hour service. No. Three-hour service, and then you can get on the water slide. I can't believe y 'all got water slides. Did we, last time I was on here, did we talk about the camp, the summer camp I went to in Missouri? Yes, we did. Okay. Yes, we did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did not get water slides. We went to Tennessee and like, we like built some woman a house. What? Oh, sure, sure, sure. We did stuff like that. Yours was not fun at all. In like Mexico. And then my pastor washed my feet. That was a real turnoff for me. Oh, sure. That was a real turnoff for me.

41:47I didn't like that. Sure. But it probably did something really awesome for him. He was like, I'm a servant. I was like, you don't have to be, brother. Yeah.

41:56That's like Jesus was... I know why he did it. But you just didn't enjoy it as it was happening. You're a grown man and a leader in the community. I need you to unhand my foot. Also, it's like... Scary. But today, present day. Present day. Water slides aside. God, I would say I'm leaning yes. I would say I'm leaning yes, God. That's big. I like that. Christian God. Yeah. Nice. It's just because that's the one I grew up with. That's your guy. You know what I mean? In the same way I'm an Eagles fan, And it's just like, well, that's what they were giving me at the house. It's not like I didn't actively.

42:30So it's like now as an adult, I've sort of grandfathered into Christian God. Yeah. I guess I could look into some other ones, but I just haven't yet. Shout out to everybody's God, whoever y 'all got. Shout out to all gods. Yeah, whatever you got going on. You think man in the sky? You think physical man? No, no, no. It was never man in the sky. I think, I don't know. I don't know how much I've interrogated my relationship with God as an adult, as a grown up. but I do think that it like, I do think that, I do like to think that there is like a, a greater plan to all this. I think it comforts me.

42:58Whether or not it's true, who's to say? Who cares? But it like does, it does make me feel good to like know and like put my prayers and thoughts out into something and like hope that that manifests into something positive in my life. Yeah, I've gotten so bored of correct. I don't care about correct. Yeah, I don't know what's actually going on, but it does, in this world, you got to find comfort where you can. Yeah. You know what I mean? With everything. And it's like, yeah, that does, it like feels nice to me to like feel like I have like a relationship with God. You can be right and lonely and sad and scared or you can be wrong and happy and comfortable.

43:29I'll take the second one. Wait, where are you at? God, yes or no? Oh, sure. Yeah? Oh, sure. I think so. I mean, man in the sky, no. But I'm down with what I think is no hell. I don't believe in hell. I really don't. I hope, I mean, I hope not. I just don't get, I think, I think every, I think maybe I could understand nothing happening. That makes a lot of sense to me. Sure. I can understand everyone getting to go to a good place. I cannot make sense of eternal suffering for absolutely anything. I don't think there's anything you could do on earth that would warrant eternal suffering. Nothing. Nothing.

44:01Whoa. There are horrible, horrible things you can do and you shouldn't. But eternity to me is like, that doesn't, that just doesn't clock. There's nothing equivalent. Sure. I don't think eternity makes any sense to me. I wouldn't, I wouldn't wish eternity on the worst person you can think of. I would wish very bad things. Sure. Which is bad of me. So it's like, it would kind of be nice in your mind if there was like, if you could sentence someone to like, to hell like prison. Where you could be like, all right, so you got eight, you did X, Y, and Z, you get eight years in hell. I don't know. And then after eight years, then you can get out and you can go somewhere else.

44:36How does that sound to you? I don't, I would be down with it if that's what God wants, I guess. Four years in hell for. You serve a little hell. You know what I mean? You do a little hell because you did some hell on earth. Yeah. And then you do a little bit of hell and then you get to, you do your time. You know, I've said this before, and this makes me sound really bad. Can't wait. But I think if man in the sky, Christian God, like really the way they've talked about it turns out to be real, I low-key believe that when I get to the gates, no matter what, I think I could win him over. I don't doubt that about you.

45:05I think I could make my case. I don't doubt that about you. I think he would be like, you were supposed to confess that my son died on the cross for your sins while you were on earth, and I could be like, that's seriously my bad. I really Hey big dog That's on me I really admit that I fucked up on that part But I really did Try to do good And be good to people And I think You play my tape So you can see my work Yes And to me that's I don't know That version of it Seems so much more realistic Than the version of it Than we got sold Or at least the version That I got sold When I was a kid Yeah Which was truly like I don't know I feel like I still have Residual shame From like the type of shit That they were doing They were always like Did you ever go to One of those like Church services Where like a guy who used to play like college football like comes and talks to you yeah did you ever have this a very classic if you grow up christian and i remember being a kid being like maybe like 10 and we had like a spring break church thing and they brought a guy in he used to play like like wide receiver at like texas tech yeah and he was like a high school hot shot and he came in and he was like man i remember you know i remember i was like the number one recruit in the country and i had a d1 scholarship and i was hooking up with a different woman every single night and i I had a motorcycle, and I was getting cash under the table.

46:19And I remember hearing, he was saying this like it was a bad thing, and I remember hearing all that stuff and being like, man, that life sounds awesome. Fuck yeah. That sounds fucking sick. What do I got to do to live like that? You're like, I'm kind of interested in sin. Yeah, and I'm like, I don't really know if I'm rocking with what you got going on right now. So what do you do right now? You sell insurance? And you come here? You sell insurance and you go to church, gymnasiums to talk to kids? That's less fun to me. Yeah. And so I don't know. I feel like I was always sort of sold this version of like, all right, well, you got to have like boring fun if you want to.

46:49You got to have like boring fun. You got to like not do trick-or-treating if you're going to be a Christian. And I feel like that version of it I like really reject as an adult. Well, yeah, it started to really not make sense to me when they were, it was just very inconsistent that they were like, they would say these big, beautiful, grandiose things. Like they'd be like, God is all-knowing and all-powerful and created the universe out of nothing. And also, he's jealous. Yeah.

47:14And I'd be like, what? He can't overcome jealousy? And I'm supposed to give up my life? I just felt like, I don't know. My guy might not be jealous. That can't be. Because if he is, then he can't be as grandiose as you're describing. He gets mad and punishes. He's no better than a dad who watches football. It doesn't make sense to me. Which one is it? It can't be both. He can't be the originator of all beauty in the universe and also be like mad at you for little things that you've done. And also be mad if you jerked off when you were 13. Yeah, I'm like, no. It's got to. It doesn't make any sense.

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50:38I remember very, in terms of sex, when I remember like, you know, obviously like there were always like no porn and no sex. And I remember I was just like, ah, well, even at my most Christian, I was like, well, I'm just not going to listen to this stuff. I'm just like, I'm just going to reject it. And if that means hell for me, then I guess, I guess I'll go out with a smile on my face. the rest of it sounds good but i am gonna play with my shit yeah i'm gonna be having a good time when my parents go to sleep on the on the family computer i'm gonna be on the family computer uploading all sorts of images because my playlists are gonna be good yeah because it's like we only got one life my parents were very like yeah they were very like my dad was like i don't want you listening to know like music would know like cuss words and like talking about this and talking about that and i was like no i was just like no i'm doing that i'm gonna do that stuff i just never i don't know i just never bought into the like really restrictive version of christianity it just like never just never clicked for me i was just like i just don't know how much time i got left i can't live as boring as y 'all are describing you want life to be i can't do it it's not for me i will say though look the constant question like that i think you have to ask yourself when you were raised religious and you turn out a good person is like well i don't know It kind of seems like it all worked out.

51:56There's so many things I learned in religion as a kid that I'm like, that was fucked up and really traumatized me. But then overall, I really think I turned into a person that I'm proud of. And I'm like, oof, well, fuck, I guess it kind of. Oh, I guess it stuck. Do you know what I mean? It's like something worked. I don't know. Maybe. I mean, who's to say? Maybe without it, it still would have worked, but I don't know. Who's to say? Yeah, I guess chicken or the egg, but I don't know. I'd have to imagine you wouldn't have ended up like a piece of shit. I can't have to imagine. We'll never know.

52:24Yeah, I guess we won't. We'll never know. I'm not saying there are good people that weren't raised religious, sure. But I'm just saying, for me, I'll never know because it was part of my thing. You want to have a family. You were talking about this. I do. You want to have a family. Would you raise your kids Christian? No, I'll raise my kids Universalist Unitarian. Yeah. I love the UU church. I think it's so fucking cool. And it's no dogma. And it's people of all different kinds of faiths. And it really is shout out to everybody's God. Like, it is like, yeah, there's Muslim people there. There's Jewish people there.

52:55I really like UU, and I think it's so community-centered and cool. Yeah, I'll have my kids in something, though. I can't. I've got baby fever right now. Bad. Really? Bad. Have you thought about, like, what route are you going for baby? I'm going to take a couple of them. Okay. I want to take a couple of them. Okay. I want to have, like, three, four kids. Whoa. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah. And it's like, are you going straight up adoption? Are you, like, you having a surrogate? What's the vibes? Surrogacy, I have questions about. I need to do some research. I still don't fully understand the ethics of surrogacy, which is no shade to anybody.

53:28I just have heard differing opinions. So I don't know. Here's my ideal. Yes, I'm going to adopt a couple kids. A couple kids out there that need a home, they're going to hit the lottery. They're going to end up with a real cool gay guy. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. They're going to have a lot of fun. We're going to really hang out and have a good time. And I'm going to get them lots of gifts and toys and cool shit. They're going to have a good time being my kid. Okay? I'll adopt some kids. No worries. And then what would be ideal is if I find a gay man that I want to spend my life with and he feels the same way.

53:58We'll call that step number one. All right. We are still in the R &D phase of that. Are you open to being a single dad? Absolutely not. Hell fucking no. Hell fucking no. No way. Sure. Someone's doing this with me. I don't care. I'll settle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I won't. No, I won't. Okay. but

54:25no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no i won't make you i won't do it i won't do it okay but me and this gay guy yeah okay or bi guy or queer guy whatever his deal is no worries i'm open this guy who's really into me his sexuality he really should be caleb sexual of course you know caleb sexual he should be on his caleb 75 He wants to be on Caleb Life. Right, of course. So me and this guy, we find two lesbians that really, really want to kind of go in split style on a baby. I see. And so then as a unit, you would all be co-parenting. Yeah, we have a couple.

55:02The four of us have a couple. Oh, that's nice. He gets one of them pregnant. I get one of them pregnant. I get the other one pregnant next time. He gets the other one pregnant. And then we all just have a couple kids that we're just kind of, we're all raising the kids. So now, I mean, now in this version of it, it sounds like you have like six kids. Well, I could do, yeah, I could do up to seven. Oh, my God. Minimum, I think minimum three, maximum seven. If there's a couple lesbians involved in the mix. If there's no lesbians, I'm out on seven. Sure, because you're going to need to be able to trade some of these little guys off.

55:31Yeah, I'm not going seven without the lesbians. Yeah, one of them homies is going to have some behavioral issues and you're going to have to be like, you're going to need to go over there. Yes. I can't even look at you right now. You're going to your mom's house. Yes. Sure. And so I'll do seven with the lesbians. No lesbians. I'm out on seven. I could cap it at four. Three or four? Three or four without the lesbians. Oh, my God. You're living like our ancestors for real. Yeah. Four to seven kids. I'm interested. It'd be fun, dude. God, brother, you better get started. One is crazy. You better go ahead and load up.

56:00I'm ready. You better go. I'm ready. Interesting. Who are you looking for? In a man? Yeah. Oh, God. Well, I've been kind of looking at everybody. Yeah. I've met a few of your... My mind is open. Yeah, I've met a few of your people. You can attest. I don't have a type. That's true. I haven't met that many, but I feel like of the ones that I've met, I'd say there's slightly a theme. What's the theme?

56:29I'm genuinely asking. What's the theme? Because I don't remember who you've met.

56:35It's black guys. No! No, that's not true. Sure, I did a lot of black guys, but I'm dating lots of other guys as well. I didn't say exclusively. I'm just saying of what I've known, of what I've been familiar with. I haven't seen everyone that you've been involved with. I just want the listeners to know, if you are a gay black man, yes, of course. Give me a call. But if you are a gay man who isn't black, you also could maybe get in the situation. Maybe. See, there's a skepticism there. You're hearing it. You're hearing it. He said, if you're black, ring my line. Ring my line. I'm available right now.

57:10If you something else, we'll have a conversation. Send us your resume and your cover letter and we'll look over everything and then we'll see where we land. We'll see. Well, that's, yeah. Mostly it's just there's less white guys. Less specifically white guys. Oh, I see. You're kind of, you're out on the white man. Not out. It's just there's more research that gets done. Sure, sure, sure, sure. Depends on what kind of. Because what, we're both going to be white?

57:34There's a, there's an episode of Seinfeld where Elaine is going out with this guy and she can't tell his ethnicity. She can't tell if he's black or not. He kind of looks like Logic. He's got a really whatever. And then by the end of the episode, he tells her that he's just white and he thinks she's Latina. Yeah. And then they both discover they're both white and they're like, oh, so we're just like two white people together? Yeah, ugh. Yeah. That don't seem right. Doesn't feel right. No, no, no, no. That's not, uh-uh. It's just, yeah, I don't know about that. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. I see.

58:07Okay. I guess it can go a lot of ways with white gay guys specifically. White cis gay guys? It can get yucky. Those are a lot of Republicans. I'm not interested in that. If you're a cute gay white guy and you want what I want, feel free to hit me up and we'll check out everything. I mean it. I mean it. Everybody come through. This is like the way that I respond when somebody asks if I want to go lift weights in the morning. because it's like I don't it's like I really don't but I'll be like you know what yeah just hit me hit me when you wake up and when you wake up I'll see if I'm up if we're both up then maybe we could do that if it's raining I probably won't make the walk but yeah no it's downstairs this is like when somebody asks you to work out on vacation and you're just like I had some drinks let's see how the morning plays out Yeah, yeah, we'll see what's up.

59:06Yeah, because my stomach could be with the flights and everything. We'll see. Yeah, that's like you and white men. We'll see. Look, I'm open to it. I mean, you know, I am tired.

59:19I am tired. Are you, do you do apps? Of course I do apps. Okay, got you. And I have to put in my Grindr bio, do not talk to me about my job. These gay men hitting me up. Oh, because you're famous. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I forget about. Low key. No, no, no, high key. Don't want to be. necessarily. It's something that's happening. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. But they're messaging me two in the morning. I'm clearly on here to get laid. Messaging me, yeah, I love your clips, King. If you don't get the fuck out of my DMs. I'm trying to get sucked off. I'm trying to get sucked off. Do not talk to me about TikTok.

59:50I wouldn't say it that graphically, but yeah. But that's what's at the core of your message. Unless it's, I love your clips, and I'm coming over. Yeah, I'm on the way. There's no need to let me know. Sure. Put it in the Instagram comments. I see. Yeah, that's truly, that does belong in the comments. Check with Live Nation about it. You know, see when I'm in your city. Yeah, no, I totally hear you. I've never even thought about the way that that must, you know, kind of get in the way of your whole situation. Well, a lot of gay guys that have a public life, they get off-grinder or they don't put their picture on there.

1:00:23But I'm hornier than them. Oh, I see. I'm much more serious about this. What? Okay. Would you date another person who's a public person? Would you ever do that? Oh, if I ever met one, I could stand. I mean, you beat these people. You know. I do know. I do know. We know. Yeah, we really do. And it really is like a big part of working at SNL was really getting to see famous people really up close and being like, I don't want to be like that. I'm good. I'm good on that. I don't want to be like that. I don't envy what you got going on in any type of way. At all. Yeah, that is, yeah, there's a lot to that.

1:00:57I'm just, if I met a single gay guy who was not interested in poly, who I enjoyed being around, and he happened to have a similar life to mine, sure, I would consider it. Interesting. But I'm asking for the world. That's a lot of... I'm asking for a monogamous gay guy who wants kids. I might as well be asking for a trip to fucking Mars. From my experience. Sure, sure, sure. You've done the research. You can have kids? I would like to, yeah. Nice. How many? I would like to have kids. Two tops. You want to do three? No. Okay. No worries. Two, because it's like, what are we doing at that point? I just, I would like, because it's like, because it's like, I want to, I do want to have a kid, but it's also like, I want to, I'm not an only child, but all my siblings have like, we have huge age gaps.

1:01:44So we all kind of grew up only children for like big sections. Like my older brother's 12 years older than me. So when I was finishing kindergarten, he was graduating from high school. Yeah. When I graduated, my little sister's 10 years younger than me. so it's like when I was graduating high school she was in like third grade. So it's like we all kind of like we all sort of grew up separately. You know what I mean? We were never in similar stages of life and I feel like I would want to give my kid like a proper sibling. It was like a few years apart. One is crazy. One is... To me, one feels crazy.

1:02:13You're an only child, right? Not really, but it's complicated. Oh, sure, sure, sure. It's similar. Yeah. Similar kind of. Yeah, it is similar. And it's like one just to me feels crazy and honestly because my brother and I were so not in the house at the same time really I'm like I think a couple more would have been nice yeah it would have been nice to like have that I really do really envy like siblings who have like like oh remember when you know remember that one Christmas when we were like I envy siblings who got to live in similar stages of life together yeah like I always it makes me happy to like hear people's stories when they were just like yeah like we were growing up our dad used to always fucking slip on this roller skate

1:02:54your dad was never slipping on roller skates? Well, but it's like, if he did, I couldn't laugh. I had to laugh about it to myself. You know what I'm saying? I really do. I really, I really, my heart does get warmed when siblings have like together memories and they're like, oh yeah, remember like, oh, we were doing this together because I like, I didn't have that. And so if I had kids, I would want to give that to them. Yeah, you slip on the skate in front of them, they get to laugh together. And God knows I would. Yeah. My dad would like, I guess I had to have that with my mom. My dad's whole, like a big thing that me and my mom will roast my dad about is like, he like wore a suit for work so he always looked nice when he stepped out of the house.

1:03:28In the house, couldn't care less about what he looked like. My man, ashy as hell at all times. Yeah, alright. Every Christmas morning we have pictures of him, his knees, bright white, bright white, like Casper the Ghost. He's going out in a suit and providing and you guys are giving him shit on Christmas? You got to. Leave my guy alone. Brother, we got plenty of lotion in this house. We live in a black house so there's all sorts of Vaselines of cocoa butters of various varieties. Like, you have no reason to look like this. And he would constantly. Oh, man, I feel for him. Yeah, he's fine. He's fine.

1:04:01He's good. Actually, don't worry about that. Don't actually worry about it. He's fine. Two kids I see for you. Three I think would be nice. Maybe you'll open your heart at some point. It's just like, I don't know. I already live in New York. Everything's always. Yeah. Everything's so pricey. Yeah. Everything's so pricey. The taxes of it all. Yeah. Now I'm adding kids, but I guess then you get tax breaks. People don't want to hear us talk about this. Sorry. No, they do. Oh, they do. I stopped caring what people want me to talk about on here after about the third week of having the show. Oh, that's nice.

1:04:28I'm just like, y 'all are going to get what I give. That's a thing that I admire about you a lot. I admire a lot of things about you. But a thing that I admire maybe the most is that you really kind of do what you want all the time. We were talking about TV stuff, and I was like, oh, would you ever like, what do you want to do? Do you want to write on a show again? And you go, I never write for somebody else's fucking show. I did. I didn't love it. You go, I'm never doing that again for the rest of my life. And it's like, I think there's, I was like, oh, that's so tight. Because me, I feel like I'm like, I don't know.

1:04:56I'll take a job. I'll take a job. I'll go do a thing. And you're just like, oh, no, I don't want to do that. So I won't do it. Yeah. And that's, I do admire that about you. That is not, thank you. That's very, very kind. I don't think it's admirable. I think I have a real problem. I think I have a real attitude problem. I have an issue with authority that is like clinical. Same. I do not like being told what to do. Same. Even by myself, even by a doctor. Oh. I don't like being, and last time I said this, people started telling me I have autism. Not everything's autism. They are trying to make everything autism right now.

1:05:25I don't like being told what to do when I'm autistic. Look, I send my love to the community. Shout out. I just don't think that's necessarily autism. Maybe it is. I don't know. But what I'm saying is, I can't do any. When you tell me to do something, I don't like it. I have that same thing as well. It makes me sick. Yeah. I'm like, no, I don't want to do it. It doesn't matter if I wanted to do it. It doesn't matter. I've said this a million times on here, but even when I tell myself to do something, That's why 75 Caleb is so important. And I'm excited to see, we don't see each other as much as I'd like, because we're both running around.

1:05:57But I'm excited to see you next time and see how many days through 75 Caleb you made it to. Before you leave here today, I'm going to put a check-in on your calendar. Please do. We're going to go to dinner. Maybe like halfway through? Halfway through. You owe me a dinner, by the way. Pardon? Yeah.

1:06:13The Chiefs and the Eagles played each other. The Chiefs and the Eagles played each other. Cut this. And we made a wager. We made a dinner wager during this last NFL season. I vaguely recall. Where would you like to go? I don't know. I'm going to look through some stuff. I'm going to look through some options. I'm going to sort$4 signs and up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You got it. I really want you to take advantage of this. And I would like to. I mean that. Wait, I wanted to ask you this. We both have a real authority thing. Yeah. Your dad, what was he like? My dad? Yeah. Like, what was he like?

1:06:47Was he like a real authoritarian type of old school dad? He tried sometimes, but he wasn't in the house and I didn't respect him. So anytime he would tell me to do something, I'd be like, you're not really my father in most ways. I mean, I love him very much and shout out and rest in peace to him. But he would try to, he'd be like, he'd be like, the important thing about being a man. I'd be like, you're not in the house. You know what I mean? That's one of the big important things about being a man. One of the big things is being in the house with your kid or being great at being a dad outside of the house.

1:07:13And you are not very good at this. Sure. So I'm not really going to listen to you about almost anything. He had some cool lessons. He had some good moments. My dad was brilliant. So I really respected his intellect. But yeah, as far as telling me what to do, it was like, I don't really think so. Wait, where do you think it comes from then? Because mine directly comes from having like a military dad. Opposition to your dad. Yeah, yeah. Mine's, I can directly tie it to like, I really don't like people telling me what to do. And if you tell me to do something, I'll probably do exactly not that. Yeah?

1:07:39Yeah, I have that. I think mine was that I grew up with a single mom and I had to grow up very early. my mom is a great parent but she was I had to do a lot of stuff for myself very young and I was a very like parentified child and so I became very self sufficient very young and then anytime after that I'd be like I'm basically like I don't know teachers would tell me to do stuff at school and I'd be like I fucking do more than you do like I'm sorry but I like get myself out of bed and get myself here and I keep track of my own homework and like I do all this shit so anytime someone would tell me to do something I'd be like what the fuck do you know?

1:08:11You're gonna tell me what to do i already do everything i had that too but i think mine was much less earned yeah okay i don't know if mine was earned but i was certainly doing stuff you were like doing you like had like adult responsibilities as a kid so you kind of wanted you wanted the adults to kind of meet you at that level yeah and like talk to you as if you had like that level of agency right yeah and also just leave me the fuck alone and stop with these bullshit i you if you if you realize that too young of an age that adults are full of shit they'll tell you shit they'll be like you can't do that and you go, why?

1:08:42And they don't have a reason and then you're expected to do it anyway. That would get me a lot of time. I'm like, fuck you. I'd just be like, okay, look, I'm down to do what you're talking about, but just tell me why it's important. And if you can tell me in a way that tracks to me, then it's like, I got you. If you can't, then I'm probably going to do it the way I want to do it. I get so mad. My little cousins, when they get told to do stuff at school and then they get in trouble for not doing it, I'm like, I want to go down to the school. I want to go down and be like, what's your fucking reasoning?

1:09:10Sure. Why? And it's not because I think they're right. They're kids. But I'm like, I just don't. You're not doing a good enough job of explaining it. And they're not supposed to be like little robots for you. I don't like it. I'm with you. It makes me mad. I'm with you. I'm excited to see the little non-rule following kids. Oh, no. They're going to fall in line. My kids? No, they'll be listening. They'll do what they're told. Yeah, no. I mean, I don't know. It'll be interesting to see. It'll be interesting to see. Because everybody has ideas about how they'll parent in theory. Sure. And then when you're an actual parent, I'm sure my theory is.

1:09:40series will go out the window pretty quick. Yeah. I'm curious. I mean, if we're going to do it, we got to start. You a little sooner than I.

1:09:52Jay, look, it's a little. I get on this podcast and Caleb talks to me like I'm 56. No, it's just the timelines are, they are, you know, objectively a little different. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. No, you're right. I do. I'm thinking about it. Time to get started up. I got to figure it out. Yeah, especially if you're planning on doing it OG style. That's true. Original recipe. That's true. But it's also like, I don't know. It's also kind of chic. Do you think it's kind of chic to like have a kid at like 45? Completely. Yeah. There's something kind of fly about that. I won't be doing it. Yeah.

1:10:20I don't know. I don't know if I want to do it with my like, who knows what's going to happen with my back. Yeah. I can't be throwing out my back, picking up my baby son. Yeah. No, not your baby son. Not my baby son. I'll throw my back out playing tennis. Exactly. And I've done it. And I'll do it again. Yeah. I want you to get started soon. I really do. I think my ideal is that I'd have four kids within about two years. I'd like them all to be just right at that same... Oh, I see what you're saying. Like, wait. Not two years from now. Within the same two years. Four children in two years? Yeah, I want them to all be about the same age.

1:10:53Like, maybe two in each grade. It's possible when you're a gay guy, because you don't have to wait on the reset time, respawn for the girl. Sure, so you're kind of... Respawn time. Do you know what I mean? I'm talking about pregnancy like it's Halo. Do you know? There's a refractory period. Sure, sure, sure. Now we're gay guys. It takes you a second to bounce back. Yeah, you got two lesbians that you're doing business with? Oh, sure. And especially if you can get two sets. Bang, bang, bang, bong. Bing, bang, boom. Yeah. And then you do adoption as well. All of a sudden, four kids. Maybe they're three months apart.

1:11:23That sounds like a lot of work for yourself. Really nice, though. Yeah, but I guess you kind of got it all out the way. Because it's like, let's just get them. Let's just get them. They can share cars to school. We're buying one car for a lot of them. One year, in like 2009, Lil Wayne had like four different kids with four different women. Yeah. In the same like calendar year. Sure. And that's how you were kind of trying to live. I feel that were I heterosexual, I feel that I would have two babies by now. Really? Not on purpose. Sure. You think you would have slipped up like in high school or something like that?

1:11:52I think for sure. Yeah. It would have been a really tragic story. Or would it have been beautiful? Or would you have been doing this version of your career as a, well, I guess, no, you're a straight man forever in this scenario. In this scenario, I never stop being straight. Oh, I see. I guess everything would probably be different then. I don't know that comedy... I don't think comedy works out for me as a straight guy. I don't think the way I am really works. I don't think it plays. Yeah, it'd be entirely different. I think I'd get a lot of passes for gay. Sure, sure, sure, sure. I see. Yeah, I'm curious.

1:12:25I talk to people a little crazy. I guess. for straight if a straight guy i don't yeah people it's not coming off as charming i don't think it's so cute if i'm a straight guy with children and a wife yeah they're like yeah also people you know when a straight when a straight guy with a wife has like our lifestyle you're like hey man you gotta time to walk in you know you gotta you gotta lock in go raise those children you know what i'm saying yeah go to the oil rig you can't be creating content exactly yeah but as for me when i'm like oh i'm doing 75 days where i get up before 9 a.m i think it's kind of cute It is funny because we live such unserious lives.

1:13:01We live such unserious lives. I work, man, especially now that I'm not on the show, this year, collectively, I've worked real work work. What, six, seven hours? Man, maybe the equivalent of one week. And we're about to be in June. If you add it all up, the amount of hours I put in, probably one full week of work. Yeah. And I'm doing fine, and that's fucked up. Yeah. That's really fucked up. It's legitimately wrong. And like, it's not right the way that we are allowed to live. And I do feel like I, yeah, it's when you say that, like waking up before nine, every time I do it, I'm like, I mean, it's pretty nice.

1:13:38And I forget that like people, I used to have to do that every day. A lot of things are nice when you are choosing to do them. Yeah, totally. Do you know, like when I had jobs that I had to get up at 7 a.m., I was like, this is fucking ridiculous. And now I get up at 7 and I'm like, this is the actually definition of luxury. Well, and also, like, our version of, like, waking up for 7 a.m. Like, at 7 a.m. is, like, all right, well, I work out at 8, and then I, like, have lunch with my friends at noon. Yeah. And then I, like, maybe do a show at night, and then maybe I, like, type a little bit in between that.

1:14:07See, but a lot of these comics are not getting up at all. They're sleeping until 3 because they got four spots at 2 a.m. True. That's crazy. I'm glad that I'm not in that. I've never been in that. I'm not in that. Maybe I should be. That'd be a fun era. I'd come watch your spots. I wouldn't even want you to do that. Devin, what's so true to you right now? What is so true to me? I don't know. I think just like leaning on your community, leaning on your friends and your family and like, you know, in a way that's like, you know, remembering, I think as a straight man, I think you forget that you can like lean on your homies when you're like going through some shit.

1:14:40And I think, yeah, reminding myself of that and then like doing that, leaning on the homies and like, getting uplifted in that way. Yeah. That's so true to me. You can call me anytime, Devin. I know. I just, I always assume you're gone. Well, call me anyway. Yeah, fair enough. Because I might not be, and also I'll come back. Fair. And I'll remember, but you can call me anytime. I would do anything for you. You can lean on me, brother. Damn. I got you. Lean on me. Come on. Say that. Yeah. Should we start a band? We should do something. We should do something. We should do something. We should do something.

1:15:11Yeah, for sure. We should do a show together. Okay. Okay. I'm down. You want to play a game? Yeah, let's do it. You know the deal. Devin, I'm going to read you 15 statements. You're going to tell me as quickly as you can if what I just said was true or false. If you get 10 or more correct, we're going to give you 50 U.S. dollars. Yes. Yes. You ready? Yeah. The Walking Dead ran for 11 seasons. True. That's true. Lacrosse has been played since the 12th century. True. That is true. The average lifespan of a goldfish is three years. False. False. It's 10 to 15 years. St. Paul is the capital of Minnesota.

1:15:36That is true. That is true. Vince Young threw more touchdowns than interceptions in his NFL career. That's false. That is false. The movie 8 Mile came out 24 years ago.

1:15:47That's false 24? No, that is true It's true Hippos can run at a top speed of 11 miles per hour I feel like they might be faster than that I'll say true False, 19 miles per hour I know, I was right I gotta trust my gut The Navy is the biggest branch of the U.S. military Ooh I'm gonna say true False, the Army Ringworm is a fungal infection That's true That is true Torchy's taco slogan is damn good That is true That is true Chlorine makes plants green. That's false. False. It's chlorophyll. Infinity is a number. That's false. That is false. Camels store water in their humps. That's true. False. It's fat.

1:16:27What? Oreos are a type of dolphin. Orcs. Sorry. Orcs. I use water in camel's humps. No, it's fat. It's all fat. It's a rumor. Where do the waters go? Where does the water go? Man, somebody fucked me up. I'm glad you went back to that because I said Oreos are a type of dolphin. And my brain really thought that was the sentence. Orcas are a type of dolphin. False. It's true. What? The current mayor of Pflugerville, Texas is Chad Harris. Oh, my God. I actually don't know the mayor of my hometown. I'm going to say true. False. It's Doug Weiss. How do you do, Chance? Oh, fuck. Ten. Ten. Let's go. $50.

1:17:07Of course it's Doug Weiss. The Weiss family and the Pflugerville started Pflugerville. Yeah. So, like, the Weiss's, like, I didn't grow up around Pflugers, but I grew up around Weiss's. I went to high school with Brandon Weiss, Courtney Weiss. Damn, shout out. And, yeah, I'm sure, and that is clearly a relative of theirs, of course. They literally, like, own the town. Like, they are, like, millionaires because they just, like, had all the land first. I don't like that. Vote him out. I'm calling on Pflugerville citizens now. Vote out the Weiss and Pfluger families. Get them out. They've both been in power.

1:17:37That's so funny. Of course it's a Weiss. That makes all the sense of the world. Yeah. I like that your town has that, too. Yeah. I'm working on a will right now I'm working on a will and testament Early Yeah well my business guy was like You need to get your shit in order And I'm not leaving anybody anything Specifically because of this I don't want my little cousin sitting around going like He's cool but would be nice Think again bitch I'm giving everything to my aunt And she will distribute it I'll give her some general ideas I'll say pay off a couple bills for everybody Whatever that is and then give the rest away.

1:18:14Nobody's going to be sitting around waiting on me to die. Whoa. Y 'all aren't getting anything. And another thing, for any interested young gay men, prenup. We're signing a prenup. Sure, sure, sure. We're signing a prenup. That makes sense. I think everybody should, honestly. An extensive one. I think if you think you're going to have anything for real, I think it just makes more sense. I think someday I might, and so we're signing a prenup. You're doing fine. Prenup. We're signing a prenup. Is that from an actual song, or is that just an original note? That's the song I'm writing right now. They're going to play it at my wedding.

1:18:44For any potential student. You're electric sliding down the aisle. Prenup. Me standing at the wedding. He signed a prenup. You're going to need to sign that prenup. I can't wait. It'll be good. I hope. You know, I'm excited to be at the wedding. You'll be there. Yeah, I'm excited to meet this beautiful fellow black man. If he's out there. God, God, if you can hear me. Devin's God and all other gods. Yeah. Send me whoever. I'm interested. Yeah. of course Devin it's been beautiful to have you I can't wait to have you again tell the people where they can find you follow me on Instagram Devin Walker internet Devin follow the podcast Caleb has been on for an episode it's called My Favorite Lyrics it's so fun we are legitimately building a we're building a base of guests that I don't think any other podcast has ever had we've had both Cash Cobain the rapper and Chloe Trost nobody other podcast can say that they're not doing that and yeah check it out it's honestly a blast and somebody that you like has probably been on it already.

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