In short
Designing a meaningful life using human-centered design thinking: build a “compass” (life story, work view, life view), then “navigate” with prototypes and wayfinding when the destination is unclear. Meaning comes from aligning story/values/actions, managing fear of novelty, and connecting work to something bigger (community, compassion, spirituality or secular purpose).
Guest background
Bill Burnett is co-founder of Stanford’s Life Design Lab and co-author of Designing Your Life and How to Live a Meaningful Life. He studied design at Stanford (engineering + design + human-centered psychology/anthropology), worked on Star Wars toys (Kenner/Hasbro), startups, Apple’s laptop team, then ran design programs at Stanford’s D School for ~15 years and taught design-based life-launching classes for decades.
Key claims
Uncertain futures require wayfinding, not one fixed plan; meaning and purpose are linked to positive psychology; curiosity + radical collaboration + prototyping counter fear; values must become concrete actions (not platitudes).
Notable examples
Early class piloted with six students; “three life designs” produced in the studio; fear response is stronger for unfamiliar solutions; mid-career professionals (law/medicine/engineering) often feel deeply unhappy despite success; immigrant story distinguishes money from meaning.
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOBill Burnett's Journey to Design
0:19 to 6:22
Bill shares his background, experiences, and journey to becoming a life design expert.
“In it, he introduced the idea of applying design thinking to a challenge that many of us face, figuring out how to live a life that is meaningful to us.”
Design Thinking for Life
6:22 to 10:25
Discussion on how design thinking principles can be applied to create a meaningful life.
“And I didn't know that it would be so easy to translate designing products into designing a meaningful life.”
Navigating Uncertainty in Life
10:25 to 14:00
Exploration of strategies for navigating an uncertain future through life design.
“We want to know that our life is meaningful and purposeful.”
Embracing Uncertainty in Life Design
14:00 to 18:20
Discover how uncertainty can drive innovation and creativity in life design.
“Or when you see the thing I've got, even though it's everything you said you wanted, you might say, oh, that's interesting.”
Curiosity and Prototyping in Education
18:20 to 22:00
Learn how curiosity and prototyping are essential in teaching design thinking.
“design can turn that into something that's actually exciting and something we look forward to is very meaningful.”
Overcoming Fear and Building Agency
22:00 to 26:10
Explore strategies to overcome fear and build a sense of agency in decision-making.
“So in addition to the process, it's curiosity plus radical collaboration plus prototyping is how we built the first classes.”
Pursuing True Passions
26:10 to 28:00
Understand the importance of pursuing what you truly want instead of just following rewards.
“I mean, it's what we advise, is that start small, set the bar low.”
Finding Your True Path
28:00 to 36:30
Explore how to identify personal interests versus societal expectations.
“In the class for PhD students, in office hours, I'll go, why are you doing a PhD in molecular biology?”
Creating Meaning in Your Work
36:30 to 38:32
Learn strategies to bring meaning into your current job or life.
“just shout up one day when David Kelly said, hey.”
Money vs. Meaning
38:32 to 41:24
Understand the balance between financial stability and personal meaning.
“40 50 sometimes more hours a week so it's the one thing yeah that dominates a lot of your time but it doesn't have to dominate all your energy your intention your your soul or whatever so first What does it on your life?”
Show all 20 chapters
Aligning Values with Actions
41:24 to 42:04
Discover how to personalize broad values like kindness in your life.
“and then designing the thing that is the 40, 50 hour a week thing to be at least a positive energy, life-giving thing.”
Designing a Meaningful Life
42:04 to 46:06
Learn how to take control of your life by identifying and acting on your personal values.
“I tell my 45-year-olds, I don't want you showing up in my retirement workshop going, I wasted my entire career doing shit I didn't like.”
Attention and Reality
46:06 to 48:22
Discover how what you pay attention to shapes your reality and mental health.
“We know how to make those apps really, really sticky and really, really interesting.”
Navigating Information Overload
48:22 to 50:04
Understand the impact of information junk food and how to maintain a healthy media diet.
“This isn't a lot of places in the world, where you don't really get a chance to pay too much attention to anything other than protecting yourself and trying to stay alive.”
Integrating Meaning into Life
50:04 to 53:08
Explore methods to sustainably integrate meaning and mindfulness into your daily life.
“I tried to get a mindfulness practice going.”
The Role of AI in Education
53:08 to 55:46
Examine how AI is reshaping the learning experience for students today.
“So I'm constantly trying to figure out how do we, I mean, I'm not teaching the same way I was teaching 10 years ago.”
Exploring Future Options with AI
55:46 to 56:00
Learn how AI can help explore life choices and career paths in innovative ways.
“And it's a nice friend, mostly, except in a few cases where it's convinced people to kill themselves.”
Exploring Career Options with AI
56:00 to 58:20
Learn how AI can help generate diverse career paths based on personal values.
“but this notion that it can be useful to talk about certain kinds of things that people say, well, I wouldn't even talk about that with my friend or my parents or I wouldn't talk about that with even a counselor.”
Reaching Students Beyond Elite Universities
58:20 to 1:02:38
Discover the challenges and strategies to support students in community colleges.
“And then don't worry about it because your major isn't going to matter anyway when you graduate.”
Cultivating Curiosity and Wonder
1:02:38 to 1:06:44
Understand how to enhance everyday experiences through curiosity and wonder.
“You have so many exercises in your books that people can actually try and implement.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Welcome to the Stanford Psychology Podcast, where leading psychologists come to share their most recent work. My name is Katia, and today I'm very excited to be joined by Bill Burnett. He is the co-founder of Stanford's Life Design Lab and also the co-author of Designing Your Life and How to Live a Meaningful Life. In it, he introduced the idea of applying design thinking to a challenge that many of us face, figuring out how to live a life that is meaningful to us.
0:53Thank you so much for being here. I'm very excited to talk to you today. How did you get to where you are? And did you always know that you wanted to get here? No, I started out, I grew up in Boston. I probably thought I was going to go to some Ivy League college, but I decided to apply to Stanford because, and this was my whole strategy, I wanted to get as far away from my parents as possible. So I got to Stanford and ended up going there. And that turned out to be miraculous because Stanford has the only design program that It combines engineering, design, human-centered, psychology, anthropology.
1:32And I really liked it. And that became my profession. I was a professional designer, graduated from school, got a job in a toy company doing Star Wars toys. The company is now called Hasbro. In those days, it was called Kenner. But I did Star Wars toys. I did a second movie, the third movie, and I did Raiders of the Lost Ark toys. I came back to Stanford, got my master's, and then just started working in the Valley in a couple of startups. I did one. I actually did a couple of startups myself with friends where I was one of the founders raising money. Sold one successfully, drove the other one straight into the ground.
2:07So I had both the success and failure experiences. I went to work for Apple for seven years. I really enjoyed that because we were making, I thought, great computers for everybody. They were easy to use and fun. I was on the laptop team doing the first laptops. And then I did consulting for about 10 years. I had a small consulting firm. We had offices here in Silicon Valley and then offices in Hong Kong. But all along the way, I had been teaching. We like to have practitioners in our design program teach. And so I've been teaching one class every year for, I don't know, 20-something years. And then in 2005, 2006, David Kelly, who's our senior design professor, the guy who started the D school, was starting the D school and got the money in 2005.
2:50in 2006, he was ramping up and he called me and said, Hey, I'm looking for someone to help me because I have to start this d-school thing. Can you help me run the undergraduate and graduate programs in design? And those were the programs I had graduated from. So I said, sure, that sounds like a lot of fun. And let's update the programs, make them more, you know, we haven't changed much in a bunch of years. Let's update them. So for 15 years, I ran those programs. And along the way, just entirely by accident, I got together with a friend of mine, Dave Evans, and he had been teaching a class over at Berkeley, helping kids kind of figure out their vocational stuff and what they want to do when they started work.
3:30And he said, do your students struggle to launch? I said, oh, yeah, they're smart, but they don't really know much about the world. And they've got their major, but they're not sure how their major turns into a job. And we should help them. And he said, yeah, let's do that. And I said, yeah, but it's got to be design-based. because of the design program. And there's what's the old freshman, when all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail. So every problem looks like a design problem to me. But it seemed obvious that like, if you're trying to design something like an iPhone, and I know some people on that team, and nobody knew what an iPhone was before they started.
4:06It was just like, let's do some smartphone thing. And so we know that in design, when you're trying to build something that no one's ever built before, you just have to try lots of prototypes, lots of experiments, to sort of collapse the specification around something that's useful. It seems like you don't know much about your future. You don't know what you're going to be doing five years from now, particularly the next five years when AI and everything else is changing stuff. So it seemed like designing your life would yield to the same kinds of innovation techniques that designing a laptop or a website or a service or experience would.
4:45But it turned out that was a pretty easy translation. It wasn't hard to figure out, you know, well, you can look. Design starts with empathy. Okay, empathy for myself. What do I want to do? And then empathy for the world. What does the world need? And define the problem you're working on. They come up with lots of ideas. And then project happened. So that's the basic principles behind the Designing Your Life class. We thought we were just going to do it for a few students, my graduate students, my undergraduate students, my undergraduate in design. and then it became quite popular. And now we run classes for the undergraduates, for the grad students, PhD students.
5:20And we've got a lab and we come up with new stuff to teach every year. And lots of others. When Dave and I wrote a book called Descending Your Life, How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life, we got a lot of requests from other schools. So now we've created a training program, a transfer studio, where we transfer the class to other schools to teach. because they don't have probably a design program or something like that. So it's pretty new as a way of learning because it's not really a class. It's a design studio and you design lots of stuff along the way. And then you end up with a life design at the end.
5:56Actually, three completely different life designs at the end. Because you never do one, you always do three. So that's how I mean that I never expected to be a full-time academic. I never expected to write a book. I never had a plan to do any of these things. I just did things that seemed useful. And other people said, hey, that's useful. Could you scale it? And Dave and I ended up scaling it into the thing it is today. That's such an exciting journey. And I didn't know that it would be so easy to translate designing products into designing a meaningful life. Can you share more about how exactly that works and how you've gone that shift?
6:34Yeah, you know, I didn't know if it would be that easy either until we started it. But, you know, my favorite professor in the program a long time ago was a guy named Matt Kahn. He taught in the art department. And we were a joint program with the art department. And Matt said many wise things. But one of the things he said is use design to design. So we started out by saying, well, let's run a prototype. And we ran a prototype for like six students. We gave them some problems to solve and some things to design. And it went so well that we scaled it to a slightly larger class, to a 10-week class and tried some more things.
7:06But I think our experimental method, our method of prototyping our way forward, our building our way forward, as David Kelly would say, David would say, we build to think. We're trying to figure stuff out, so we build something and we try it. But if you think about it, so you're a rising junior, got a couple more years. You'll be graduating into the middle of the AI storm of jobs and craziness. And you want to have a career and you're studying psych and maybe some design, and maybe some other stuff, which is great, by the way, because I think a multi-educated person will be more valuable in an AI world where very specific things are easily done by AI.
7:53So let's assume you'd like to have some fun, you'd like to make some money, you'd like to be intellectually challenged, but you don't really know where that future is. You're not exactly sure what that job description is because jobs are changing. And even if you kind of do what we would advise is go out, talk to lots of people, prototype lots of experiences, maybe internships, maybe even things smaller than that, just meeting people in various fields that you're curious about. You can assemble some information about what that future might look like, but you don't actually know exactly what it looks like.
8:24Particularly with things changing, the stuff you target might have even disappeared by the time you get there. So how do you move forward in an uncertain world? Well, it's always uncertain. Nobody can predict the future. This might be a little more rocky and bumpy than in previous times. But, you know, it is what it is. So now you've got to have a plan. Well, our idea is, you know, there's a difference between navigating. I'm here. I'm in my studio in San Francisco. When I want to go down to the campus, I put, you know, the campus data into my GPS, and it navigates me down. From here to there, I've got the end point, I've got the starting point, navigation works great.
9:07When I don't have the end point, I have a vague idea that I want to be somewhere in this field doing some work kind of like this, but I'm not exactly sure what that job looks like or what it's called or what company it might be located in. Then I have to do a different technique called wayfinding, where I only have my beginning point and I have a compass. I have something that's setting me on a direction. And I'm looking for the thing that I'm not exactly sure where it is. And I do that by going to different waypoints, getting more data, going to different waypoints, getting more data. But I've always got my compass.
9:36I know I'm going, you know, true north. So the class starts by building a compass. What does that look like for a person? Well, what's the story you grew up with? It's probably something like work hard, get good grace, go to a good college, get a good degree, have a good job. Your life will be happy. Okay, some of that's true. Some of that's just a complete fiction. But whatever, there's a story. And then as you grow up, you add your own elements to the story or get rid of things that aren't working. Second would be, well, what's your work view? What is your theory of work? Why do we work? What's work for?
10:08Is it just to make money? No problem. Is it to make money and perfect your skills? Great. Is it to make money, perfect your skills, and have some kind of an impact in the world? Great. You know, you just keep adding to that until you've got a work view. And then life view. What's the meaning of life in 250 or 300 words or less? what's the big picture like what how do i connect what i'm doing to something that's bigger than me so that it's meaningful um and that can be a spiritual thing it can be a religious thing it can just be a secular thing just be an idea once you've got those three things and and if you can make them coherent like my life is supports the reason i work and we always talk about life then with it with working it not the other way around don't think about your job first think about your life and then talk about it and is that consistent with the story that i tell people of who i am i am a person doing these things i'm a person who believes in these things when those are all coherent the psych positive psychology guys will say then you're gonna then you have a better chance of experiencing meaning you have a better chance of experience purpose and we know from lots and lots of positive psych and other other studies meaning and purpose are kind of what humans seek.
11:23It's a metacognition thing. We want to know that our life is meaningful and purposeful. So you do that and then you can, now you say, okay, I'm not exactly sure I'm going, but I know I'm going north. I'm heading towards jobs in human centered design with a combination of psychology and anthropology. I want to work in the area of, you know, technology and kids, because I think if we can get kids, you know, fantastic education, we'll change the world. all right now what are those you know that's my north that's my story it all makes sense to me now let's go find the things that that um people might hire me to do that for or people might engage me you know on a project or something like that to work so you get navigation you need two points wayfinding you just need to know where you are and where you're and that you're on the right track you're going in the right direction so we so that one we work on in the class and then we work on other things like you know how do you how do you find a balance in the world or work-life balance but that's a false dichotomy that's not it's really just life life so how do you go into life and let's stay in a balanced way how do you manage your energy not your time because energy is the thing that you put into the world time you can't control that your attention your energy you can control and then we do three completely different lives because as you're heading into an uncertain future have more than one target for what what you're looking for.
12:47You probably need to have that anyway, because things are going to change by the time you get there. So all of those things are design tools, the same tools I would use to design a new website. First, figure out the story. What's this about? Then figure out how to make the brand and the look and everything coherent so it all comes together. The reason for being what you're asking people to you know do or transact it all's got to be part of one coherent story when that works the brand works when the brand works you're telling a bigger picture right than just here's my website you know buy my stuff um and because you're navigating into an uncertain world you had an idea of what you thought people wanted but then they changed their mind damn it when you got there they wanted something different so you have to have more than one strategy right forgetting things.
13:39One of the things that's true about design is it recognizes that people are just fickle. Right? If you were in my focus group and I asked you what you wanted and you told me, oh, I want this and this and this and then I designed something for you and I showed it to you. By the time I showed it to you, you might have changed your mind. You might have already had something that already did that and it didn't work. Or when you see the thing I've got, even though it's everything you said you wanted, you might say, oh, that's interesting. If you can do that, then you know what I really want is dot dot dot right so the fact that people change markets change desire changes and the opportunities change because you know you wanted a job in something and that job's been automated it doesn't exist anymore all those things are variables but design is thrives with that kind of uncertainty design is good at managing that kind of uncertainty and so it works really well in life design because it gives you a sense of agency and it gets you off that i got to come up with one perfect plan.
14:38And if I screw up, you know, I'm dead. That kind of trying to engineer your way forward won't work because you just don't have enough data to come up with one perfect plan. And by the time you get there, you're going to, I mean, what I'm telling my students now is they're worried about the uncertainty. And I say, well, let's flip it around. Let's reframe it. Yeah, there's uncertainty in some of the stuff that you think you might want to do. might not have the opportunity to do for a bunch of different reasons. Well, let's turn it around. Don't you hope that you're doing something so cool in five years from now?
15:16It hasn't even been invented yet. It's the persona, AI persona driven research, psychological something or other, you know, that impacts childhood trauma in a fantastic way. and we don't even it hasn't been invented because none of those technologies are brought together but in five years they will and you will be the person who architects this thing that finally solves the childhood trauma problem that's a cool job doesn't exist yet but don't you hope you're working on something really cool that hasn't been even been invented you know five years from now so i think the other thing about design is this inherently it's an unbiased methodology.
16:04We just follow the need, come up with stuff that works. In the commercial sense, works means makes money maybe, but just in the general sense, it works for humans. Humans can use it. They're satisfied with it. It's a solution that is workable, doable. You don't have to learn it. It's just obvious. You just do it.
16:25And in life, when you're on that path, when you're on path that's just the obvious right path for you stuff shows up like i i didn't know i was going to write a book i didn't even know i was going to teach these classes i was just trying to help some students figure out how to launch you know one thing led to another but we kept prototyping we kept asking questions we get we're still asking questions i'm asking questions now like how are the students using ai and maybe we should change the class so we have more ai in it because maybe that's useful but i don't want to take away their agency i want them to you know solve the problem but how do i solve the problem if they're already solving the problem with ai right so and i've actually got two really powerful ways of accelerating the kinds of stuff we're teaching in design using ai and i can think of others as well um and as ai becomes more nuanced and more more more i don't know you gotta remember these things don't think they don't have empathy they don't have feelings but they're pretty good at mimicking that stuff and so there may be a place there for when we ask the question what do I want and what does the world need that I could do that might be a question or I could be a companion in that journey so we're always fixing it we're always trying to make it better if you looked at the stuff we did 10 years ago we don't do any of that stuff anymore it's a completely different class same principles same basic design principles because the idea is you know matching a solution to human needs is the core of human-centered design and i'm just trying to help people have agency in their lives agency in the choice they make and feeling like it's going to be a fun journey that is so wonderful and i love how you know uncertainty can be so scary and the fact that design can turn that into something that's actually exciting and something we look forward to is very meaningful.
18:28You mentioned you had six students that you were first piloting. How did you go about designing the first prototypes? Well, you know, there's, I mentioned there's a process, start with empathy, come up with a good problem, come up with lots of ideas because we know from our research, we have lots of ideas you're going to choose better. Don't just take your first idea and go with it. And then, you know, prototype things and test them. But there's also, that's fine, but really what I'm trying to get people in the class to do is to think like designers think. And designers are a little different.
19:00If you're naturally a designer, naturally a sort of creative person, you have a couple of weird flaws in your personality. You're curious. Like, curious to the point of, you do stuff that might even be dumb or dangerous because you're just curious, right? Most people have what psychologists call a high fear response to novelty. You see something unusual and you go, ooh, what's that? I don't know what that is. I'm going to stay away from that because it could be dangerous. And it doesn't have to be dangerous, dangerous. It's just I've never seen that before. And so if you're heading a scanner, your fight, flight, or freeze response would turn on, you'd have a little jolt of adrenaline.
19:41It'd be like, okay, that's dangerous. Well, naturally curious people have a flaw. They don't have high fear response to novelty. They have no fear response to novelty. So instead of going, ooh, what's that? They go, ooh, what's that? And they pick it up. And maybe they eat it. And maybe they die. Because they're just dumb that way. But you can teach people curiosity. And everybody started out curious. You were wildly – I have a six-year-old and a three-year-old granddaughter and grandson now. And you want to know what curiosity is. really looks like hanging out with a three-year-old because everything is why, why, why, and look at this and everything is cool.
20:24So start with curiosity is the way we started the class and also just asking lots of questions. And then, so one mindset, curiosity. Another mindset is radical collaboration. You can't think about, you can't sit on the couch and figure out your life by yourself. My partner, Dave, would like to say, you can't see yourself by yourself. You need to be in a community people need to bounce ideas off of thing you you need to ask people i got this idea what do you think because you can't you can't process it without bias by yourself so the class is always it's not in a lecture hall it's in groups of six three and two and we do exercises and design projects together and we see each other's results and we talk about them um one of my favorite because of the blogger and podcaster and stuff is guy Scott Galloway is a professor at New York University.
21:19And his expression is you can't read the label from inside the bottle. You just need, you need friends, you need colleagues and you need collaboration. So if you have curiosity and radical collaboration, you're talking to people who are really different from you coming up with really different ideas all the time. And then you apply that with this prototyping mindset hey rather than try to figure this out let's go try something and see what happens that'll give us more data than sitting here trying to imagine you know what what would happen if we tried something so radical collaboration prototyping the mindset of curiosity are all critical and then in our book on the meaning of life you mentioned the book that just came out in february i take curiosity add mystery the stuff in the world we don't understand curiosity plus mystery equals wonder and there's a whole bunch of new neuroscience now on wonder uh sort of transcendent states of the brain where you go wow that's amazing or look at that beautiful sunset or i can't believe you know how good this feels right so all of these uh internal feelings are also part of your compass, right?
22:33But our brain is so noisy and it talks all the time and the world is so noisy and it's talking at us all the time that we need to kind of, a little bit of practice getting back in touch with our feelings, our gut feelings and how something actually makes us feel because there's a lot of neuroscience around that form of wisdom that comes with these processing feelings. So in addition to the process, it's curiosity plus radical collaboration plus prototyping is how we built the first classes. It's what we try to teach people to be, is to get that curiosity going again. Because you mentioned fear.
23:13It is scary. It's very scary. In fact, somebody just showed me a report a couple of months ago, a neuroscience report. And the conditions were they asked people to think about a problem they have that they're really worried about. and then they ask people to think of a new solution, something that was brand new they'd never tried before. And they put them in a scanner, and they were just trying to measure fear response. And it turns out you're ways more scared of the thing you haven't tried before than you are of the problem. It's actually a big problem, and it's a bad problem, and you don't like it.
23:46But you're familiar with the problem, and you're not familiar with the change. And so the reason people don't change is because they're literally afraid to. And when you're afraid, we know when your fear response is up, fight, flight, or feed response is on, your body's generating adrenaline and, you know, hormones to make you run. And increased heart rate, increased, you know, blood pressure, temperature. And none of those things allow you to access your creative brain. They shut down your creative brain. I don't have any time for creativity. Let's just get the heck out of here. This is scary.
24:28So we have to teach people to manage fear, essentially. And it's not fear like literally I'm going to run, but it's that thing in your brain that stops you from even having the crazy idea because you don't want to say anything stupid in front of your friends or that thing where you just don't want to look different. And, you know, when we were three and four and five, we didn't care about looking different. and then school and socialization, being a teenager and wanting to fit in and all that stuff. All these social rules collapsed our ability to be curious and to think differently. And so then something that's even not very weird and different or scary just doesn't fit inside the box we've built.
25:14And mostly we built it ourselves. You know, society helped us, but we built it ourselves and you might be more fear averse, you might be less fear averse, you might be more curious or less curious. But you can learn all of these mindsets. That's the cool part, is that once you've realized thinking like a designer gives you more options, then you have an incentive to be more curious. And curiosity gives you the energy to overcome fear. And if you're trying little tiny prototypes, little tiny experiments that aren't very scary, you'll learn, oh, I can probably try anything. I can prototype my job.
25:47I can prototype my career. I can prototype my life. I can prototype a birthday party I want to throw for a friend. None of it's really scary. It sounds like it is a huge problem. If we're scared of the solution, it's more comfortable to stay in the problem. It sounds like curiosity is such a wonderful bridge to get out of our fear and start doing things so we can see what will give us more meaning. I mean, it's what we advise, is that start small, set the bar low. You know, James Clear's book, Atomic Habits, or B.J. Fogg's, a Stanford guy, wrote another book that came out at the same time called Tiny Habits.
26:30Same principle, like you break a big thing down into small steps. You master the steps slowly, one at a time, and then eventually, yeah, you're running a marathon or you've changed a phobia or something. so same thing with designing something new or trying something new in your life let's break it into small steps who could you talk to who's already doing what you're interested in doing who could you prototype with that would be you know low cost low key easy to do very accessible and you start to realize that many of the things you thought were limits are just made up they're not really limits many of the things that you thought you couldn't do you can actually try and see how you like it and it starts to build up what you know what psychological self efficacy or the sense that I'm the agent in my life agency I can make changes if I want to I mean I can't change the world it's still going to be crazy there's still going to be AI.
27:40There's still going to be climate change. But I can change my response and I can be more proactive in getting the things that are useful and moving away from kind of a, you know, a mental set of, you know, it's rewards and punishment, small rewards and punishment. Keep guiding me down the center path. Try something different. Oh, people judge me. You know, stay in the middle. Oh, I got promoted. Do more of what I'm doing. oh, I got promoted again. I got into college. Yay, I got into Sanford. Yay. And then it's so interesting. In the class for PhD students, in office hours, I'll go, why are you doing a PhD in molecular biology?
28:23You really like molecular biology? And they're like, yeah, you know, I was a good student. And then I got a research job in a lab. And then the professor said I was really good. And he offered me a spot in a PhD. student and now I've spent six years on molecular biology and I don't really know how I got here. It's like grown-ups that I admired liked me and gave me rewards. So here I am. It's like, that's not a very good way to spend six years of your life. Part of it is just giving yourself permission to do the thing you actually want to do and not just do the thing you get rewarded for. It sounds like it's easy for our compass to get off chart.
29:06And how do we know if our compass is what we truly want to do? Or if it is like in that situation, if it's something that society rewards us for or something we feel like we should do, how do we know the difference? And how do we slow down and figure out what we want to do? Well, it's a great question. And you have half the answer in the question. You slow down because you're on this hamster wheel of reward and punishment, reward and punishment. And I'm dealing with the wonderful group of Stanford students I love. I love the undergraduates. They're my favorite. Don't tell anybody. And I love the grad students and I love the PhD students.
29:47And you're all really smart. And probably if you worked really hard, you could probably get a reward. You could get a bright, shiny badge on almost anything you do and that's that's kind of a curse because a lot of other people when they try stuff they actually suck at it and so they end up someplace where they're good at something because they weren't good at other things and you guys are just good at everything so that's a problem because you're not getting a signal from the world you know you're gonna have to find it in your in your in yourself it does take a little bit of sling down or at least stepping back and going hey wait a minute um you know like when people do these odysseys three different plans for their lives and then they rate them you know hot or cold sometimes they'll do a whole plan and say i don't like this plan i go why they go and i looked at it i realized this is what my mom and dad want me to do and i've never wanted to be a lawyer to be a doctor to be a something i'm something and when i actually detailed it all out five years what would it look like if i did this i realized i would be miserable okay well that's great we used a visual tool a map to come up with a feeling that overall if because we always say do it so that it came out really well like you've mapped the whole five years and it's awesome you you got all the rewards and you look at it and go i don't really want this and then the question is why and that takes a little more going back to your compass like well what what are you working for what are you what is it it's not just money right it's going to be something else um what do you care you know It starts with curiosity, which turns into what you care about.
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31:19I really care about kids in education. Okay, then what are we doing with this lawyer thing? Let's reset, reset, reset. And maybe kids in education is just a fantasy you had because you had a teacher who really liked you and you wanted to be like her. Okay, well, let's sort that out. I came to Stanford. I wanted to be a physics major because I'd seen a NOVA show on physics. and Stanford had a big linear accelerator and my physics teacher really liked me. And he said I was smart. I was a terrible physics teacher.
31:56But literally, I declared physics because my teacher liked me and I liked the feeling I got from a grown-up who said I was smart. Not smart enough to do physics, evidently, when I got to Stanford. So it does take a little bit of stepping back or stepping away from the frame you're in and just saying, does this still make sense? And that's why when starting with my life view and my work view and the story I'm telling myself and what parts of that story aren't working anymore.
32:30So it does take a little bit of knowing yourself, stepping back, looking at the frames. But we're not a philosophy class. We're not a psychology class. We're a design class. So the way you do that is you go, well, let me design. All right. So what would it look like if I actually followed this thing and I go to law school and become a lawyer? What's that life look like? And I just detail it out as much as I can understand about how that would be. And then one of the challenges is not do a wild. What would you do if you don't have to worry about money? You got enough? And what would you do if all your friends would say, you got a Stanford degree and you want to be a clown?
33:12for Cirque du Soleil? Awesome! That's great! That's fantastic! Go for it! Instead of, what are you, crazy? I don't know how many students have come to me and saying I want to be an education major or something, but my friends are saying, why are you wasting a Stanford degree on that? I want to be a poet. Why are you wasting a Stanford degree on that? Like what you did at Stanford is going to decide what you should do for the rest of your life. Which, by the way, isn't true. 10 years out of school, less than 20 % of you will be doing anything that has anything to do with what you studied in college.
33:45That's the data. Your major is the way you organized Stanford. It's not the way you organized your life. Not for very long, anyway. But, man, it does take a little bit of work because you have to be kind of honest with yourself. Are you just chasing the little dopamine hit of someone saying, good job? Or are you doing something that actually matters to you? Which might actually not get you praise and not get you anything up front, but will eventually result in something that's meaningful. You know, I do programs for people in their 30s and 40s. And I do programs for people in their 50s and 60s.
34:28And it's pretty common, probably because they came to a life design seminar, that they're unhappy in their mid-career. they picked something thought it was going to be good doctor lawyer engineer whatever get a lot unhappy lawyers and they got there and they were and they were all successful they're not unsuccessful they're quite successful they're making a lot of money and they report themselves as deeply unhappy and they also think it's too late to change which is not the first thing we start with it's not too late to change and i'm not suggesting you change i'm just suggesting you figure out what's making you so and happy.
35:04And they do the whole process, life view, work view, stuff, they build some prototypes, they talk to some people, and they come back and they say, you know, I realize this is the first time I actually ask myself what I want, versus just doing the thing that I was good at, couldn't make money at. And I'm still not exactly sure exactly what it is that I want, but now that that circuit's turned on, that emotional circuit is turned on, I can't turn it off. I'm not going to quit my job tomorrow and go walk up a mountain in the Himalayas and try to find a guru. But I am going to start thinking about what actually works for me.
35:46And over time, they change. Maybe they're not a lawyer anymore. Or maybe they're just a civil rights lawyer now and they're working on stuff they really care about instead of writing contracts for big corporations. or maybe they're out of that but they're using that same way of thinking to drive a new non-profit that they're passionate about so it's a process it's not like oh so you take my class and suddenly you know what you want to do for the rest of your life what you know is you've got a process for figuring out what you want to become as you grow and change and as the world's opportunities change I didn't ever think I'd have an opportunity to be a professor at Stanford never on my list just shout up one day when David Kelly said, hey.
36:34Now, I mean, I had done some things in that direction, but I never thought about doing it full time. You know, things like that. You just have to know the right thing to do. By the way, that job came with about a 60 % pay cut. So there was a long conversation with my wife about whether our family could afford it. She's wonderful, by the way. She works and supported that crazy notion that I should take a big bank out and go do something I loved. My other advice is find a really good partner. That is also great advice. So when people discover they're maybe not happy and where they already are in their careers, if they're not going to quit their jobs, how can they bring more meaning into what their current job is or what their current life is?
37:26oh yeah and there's lots of there's lots of ways to do that by the way just in terms of your current job we wrote a whole book called designing your new work life right after covid about how to make your job more interesting and there's lots of ways to do that because um there's an old thing people don't quit jobs they quit bosses 70 percent of the reason people leave their jobs they don't like their boss but just quitting your company to get a different boss turns out to be just big a jerk is the last one, is not a very smart strategy. And there's lots of ways of managing inside your, you know, if you're working in a big company, I'm starting at Apple, it's 150 ,000 people.
38:04You know, if you don't like your boss, there's 100 other jobs in the company you can move laterally into. So, I mean, before you just quit something over a temp, it's only going to be your boss for the next couple of years, and then he'll move on or you'll move on or she'll move on or whatever. but um it's the important thing we always stressed in all the books including the book on work it's like design your life first with a job in it job happens to be the thing you do most of the time 40 50 sometimes more hours a week so it's the one thing yeah that dominates a lot of your time but it doesn't have to dominate all your energy your intention your your soul or whatever so first What does it on your life?
38:46And then figure out how the job fits. And by the way, the notion that the job is going to be super meaningful is pretty new. It's a sort of Gen Z-ish idea that's become quite popular. But, you know, my grandparents were immigrants. Like everybody came to this country with nothing, 50 bucks in their pocket, didn't speak English. They came from Germany. And when they got out of Germany in 1933, because that was when Hitler was elected in Germany, My grandfather thoughtfully didn't think that was going to work out so well. When he got to America, he took any job. You know, 50 cents a day, shoveling crap out of the sewage tanks in Palo Alto.
39:29I mean, he took any job because his mission was to put a roof over the kid's head and get him to a safe place and get him an education that he couldn't have. You know, on and on and on. It's a classic immigrant story. And he still had meaning in his life. He had his church, he had his community, and the other expat Germans who were also refugees. And it was rough if you were German in America during the war. His neighbors, who were Japanese, were put in a German camp. The Germans were almost the same thing. He used to throw rocks at my mom on her way to school and call her a Nazi. So life was hard, right, in those days.
40:03But make money is one thing, and meaning comes from your community and your family and other things. So money and meaning, two different things. It could come from the same place. It might come from different things. You could just work for money and have a reasonable job and make as much as you can. And then get your passion or your excitement out of coaching a girls' soccer team, coaching a Lola team, being involved with the PTA, doing something. Typically, meaning the highest level of Maslow's Pyramid is not self-actualization. in his diaries before he died he said it's not self-actualization i got it wrong the highest level of self-transcendence which in wisdom traditions is called compassion doing something for people other than yourself transcending yourself connecting your story to something bigger than yourself whether that's volunteering in your community or you know at the other end committing your life to your spiritual tradition.
41:04Whatever it is, that's where you get the life design strategy working. So you start from the outside. What's the transcendent thing in your world? Is that going to come from your job or not? That's fine. It can come from there. It can come from volunteer things. It can come from other things. So lots of ways you work in the world. They have nothing to do with money. and then designing the thing that is the 40, 50 hour a week thing to be at least a positive energy, life-giving thing. And maybe it is the meaningful thing. Maybe your job and your, now for me, my job and my meaning making are identical.
41:43Just trying to help people. I'm trying to, I tell my undergrads, I just don't want you to be that lost PhD student someday who doesn't know why they're in a PhD program. And I tell my PhD students, I just don't want you to be that lost 45-year-old engineer who shows up in my workshop going, I don't know what's wrong with my life, but I haven't had any fun in the last 25 years. And then I don't want that. I tell my 45-year-olds, I don't want you showing up in my retirement workshop going, I wasted my entire career doing shit I didn't like. So somewhere along the line, I want people to sort of stop, wake up, do the process, you know, design it.
42:22Don't just fall. I mean, life will just happen to you. It will be a series of rewards and punishments. It will just happen. That's the way it's organized. And if you don't take control of it, you could end up someplace you really didn't want to be. So to be the designer. In your book, you talk about how part of this process is knowing what you value and being in congruence with that. Some values seem more general, like kindness. I'm sure a lot of us value kindness. How do we take that value that may be more broad and make it personal to us and know what to do with that more personal part of the value?
43:04You know, yeah, it's a great question. And, you know, design is something you have to do, right? I mean, I can't teach design by showing your designs, right? Like I was just announced, I could show you all the videos of Tiger Woods swinging a golf club, but that would not teach you golf. You're going to have to pick up the club. You're going to have to swing it. I can show you how to hold it maybe, how to dress the ball, you know, some of the mechanics of it. But you've got a swing club. Same thing with design. So you can say, well, kindness is one of my values. I get great. So show me what you're doing in the world that reflects kindness.
43:41Because if it's one of your values, it's something you probably do every day. So are you kind at work? Are you kind at home? Where are you kind? I mean, don't give me these platitudes. Oh, kindness, peace, love, joy. Like, what are you doing to be more joyful? What are you doing to be more kind? What are you doing? What are you designing? And the outcome of which will be this value you hold. And when you hold yourself to that account, it's like it's pretty brutal. You realize you say a lot of stuff. She doesn't do it. And so bringing those two things together, bringing the intention and the action together, is what a designer does.
44:24It's like, okay, well, let's build something. If I build something in my life where kindness is part of what I do every day, then I don't have to think about it anymore. It's just my thing. And that might just be I go to work every day, and every day I spend an hour in the lunchroom with a friend, and I make sure I talk to all the different people that I know at the company. And I just listen because they need, I know everybody's really stressed and they just need someone to listen to them. And I'll be that person. And in the process of doing that, I'll build my compassion. And in the process of doing that, I'll be working on something bigger than myself.
45:00And it's got nothing to do with my job. My time is lunch, whenever I want. But you have to do something. My advisor at Stanford, I was the guy named Bob McKinley, who created the program. And he was a big one on sort of values clarification. You say you want to save the whales? What have you done this week to save the whales? Donate any money? Gone to any events? If you haven't done anything this week, you don't give a shit about the whales. Let's just be honest. You're just telling yourself a story to make yourself feel good. So when I talk about what's your story, I really want to know. What's your story?
45:33What do you do? and who are you in the world. And it doesn't have to be, I'm not thinking of it as a harsh thing. I'm just thinking of it as let's really talk about what makes you happy.
45:53And, you know, then let's design systems that create circumstances that will put you in that state more often than not. and then let's figure out what happens when you get angry when you get you know you get triggered when you get too tired when you get overloaded when you've spent too much time on social media too much time doing scrolling you know youtube clips or whatever and you you wake up you know you look up and you go what the hell happened you know to the hour and it's like okay that's unless unless that's something you really wanted to do probably it's just a habit you've fallen into And again, that's little systems of reward and punishment.
46:35We know how to make those apps really, really sticky and really, really interesting. But I asked my students, okay, just spend an hour on your Instagram account. Tell me three things you remember. And they don't remember anything. It was just pictures going by. So we have to, you know, in this modern society with all the distractions, Everybody wants your attention. I'm telling you, your attention is all you got. What you pay attention to is your reality. Pay attention to positive. One of the earliest findings of the positive psychologists was, if you do a gratitude journal, if you had every day, at the end of every day, you write down one thing you were grateful for, that in six to eight weeks you will notice that your brain has changed and now you're starting to see good things instead of bad things.
47:27Very simple, well-repeated, simple study. What you pay attention to is your reality. If you pay attention to conspiracy theories, that's your reality. If you pay attention to stories of compassion and joy and people helping others, then that becomes your reality. It's really up to you. It's true that stories of conflict, stories of disaster, stories of crazy suffering or absurd things,
48:08they light up more circuits in your brain. They're more agitating than other things. But that doesn't mean they're good for you, right? I mean, we are incredibly lucky and incredibly privileged. which nobody's shooting at us. This isn't the Ukraine. This isn't Gazbo. This isn't a lot of places in the world, where you don't really get a chance to pay too much attention to anything other than protecting yourself and trying to stay alive. We are in a different situation, and again, quite privileged to be able to kind of pick and choose what we think is important. And I think that's – so let's take advantage of that.
48:48I mean, both be aware that it's a great privilege and then take advantage of it. And don't squander it on stuff that just isn't, you know, that isn't. It's like, you know, I don't eat junk food. I don't eat junk food. I was traveling and I was in the Far East for a while. And after a while, you know, it's just like, I think I'll get a McDonald's hamburger. Because at least it's a McDonald's hamburger and it's not some weird, you know, weird spicy Asian Thai thing that I probably, you know, I just wanted something familiar. And I just felt afterwards, I just, and you know, the thing about a McDonald's hamburger is it tastes the same everywhere in the world, pretty much.
49:31Except it also is like, man, then I felt really bad. It's my stomach. You know, like, eat junk food. You just know it's not good for you. But every once in a while you remind yourself, yeah, junk food's not good for you. But man, there's so much junk food in our environment. so much information junk food social junk food i mean you know be entertained watch funny you know youtube stuff whatever but you just got to keep the junk food you know diet under control absolutely while being on your journey and working books and teaching your class how have you integrated the meaning into your life and how have you made this meaning to be sustainable and instead of just integrating it once how do you actually have this in your life long term yeah so when david and i first started this class i said listen we have to do everything we have to do we have to do a lot of things we have to do energy balance we got to do all this stuff because otherwise you know you're kind of the biggest hypocrite in the world saying hey this stuff really is good for you but you don't do it yourself so so one you know i do everything that i ask the students to do and because the lab has um lab fellows who come in for two years and they teach the classes with me and they also build new curriculum and stuff every time the lab fellows leave we do an exercise together you know to sort of help them get get ready to go and so um you You know, I've done everything that's in any of the books, and particularly in the last book, The Meaningful Life.
51:10I tried to get a mindfulness practice going. It didn't work. I wrote about how hard that was. It didn't work. And then the notion that we ended up with in the book, that it's actually easier than that. You don't need all these other practices. You don't need to cram your life with a whole bunch of new things. It's just, you know, it's not about getting, cramming more into it. It's about getting more out of what you've already got. So I'm spending a lot of time just trying to be present in my world and noticing the things that are wonderful and wondrous and being grateful. And then trying to figure out how to take the work we're doing.
51:50That's transcending myself. We've now taught over 700 other universities to teach the class. we're at a we got an institute uh up in in singapore that's doing all of asia and stuff so it's now just um how to best serve this work before i you know fade away uh and that's that's what keeps me honest i guess um and then and then you know when we try stuff and the students go yeah this is really boring or it didn't work or we didn't do the assignment then we go, all right, we've got to fix it. We've got to make it more engaging. People are learning differently now. I think you might have even noticed this yourself.
52:32So you had your first AI in high school, right? Yeah. I'm talking to seniors. I was talking to seniors last year. They didn't have AI until they were freshmen. But if you were a freshman or a sophomore the last couple of years, you had AI in high school. Now, in a couple more years, the new freshmen will have had AI since middle school. So it's like just the way they think, right? Which means you're learning differently. You're absorbing and integrating information differently and using an AI and some agents to kind of either support that or augment that or substitute that or whatever. So I'm constantly trying to figure out how do we, I mean, I'm not teaching the same way I was teaching 10 years ago.
53:13I'm not teaching the same way I was teaching 20 years ago because you guys keep changing. And the way you learn keeps changing. Same material. I mean, you still need to learn empathy and how to do a good interview. You still need to learn these things. But I got to learn them by looking at slides. So we're constantly trying to update what we do and keep it honest. And I get that by just getting feedback from the students, like what works and what doesn't. I love that you're changing and evolving your class as time goes by. What are you excited about looking forward? What's coming? What are you working on?
53:55Well, we are, you know, I mean, AI is obviously, you know, that cat's out of the bag. That horse has left the barn. So we built a couple of three or four new, three or four ways of doing what we used to do before, which is kind of hard to learn and using AI to give students lots and lots of repetitions and patterns because some of, for instance, aesthetics is difficult to learn. What makes something beautiful? What's a balanced composition? What's an unbalanced composition? The way you used to learn it in the old days is, you know, you just had a bunch of classes and you watched a bunch of different things and the professor broke it down for you.
54:31And so you hopefully over time developed a bunch of patterns you could match when you saw a new situation. You could say, oh, that's balanced except for this issue, or that's beautiful except for this problem, or that's coherent except for the part, the bottom doesn't look like the top. That's hard. And it took a lot of hours, and it took a lot of patterns. And so it's really good at showing you lots and lots and lots of patterns. So we're doing that with framing and reframing. We're doing that with networking. How do you network? Because that's one of the primary ways you learn to prototype is by talking to people.
55:06so that's interesting but I think it's going to be a bigger thing one of the things, I did some research with students, I sent some students out to talk to students about how they were using AI because I knew they would tell each other that, they probably wouldn't tell me exactly what they were doing one of the things that came up, and this has come up in also other research just globally is that a lot of people now particularly the younger freshman students coming in, high school students are talking about AI as a friend, as a person, kind of a confidant, a person they can talk to, even though they know it's not a person and it's not actually emotional.
55:45But it does a pretty good job of pretending to be the emotional friend that you want. And it's a nice friend, mostly, except in a few cases where it's convinced people to kill themselves. So it's not actually a friend, it's not actually a person, but this notion that it can be useful to talk about certain kinds of things that people say, well, I wouldn't even talk about that with my friend or my parents or I wouldn't talk about that with even a counselor. I'm not sure why they're willing to talk about those things with a computer, but they are. So I'm curious about the positive side of that is how could I use this notion of personas to help people examine more options.
56:36So let's say you're thinking, well, you know, we do three odysseys, and one is I'm going to be a lawyer like my mom wants me to be. The other one I'm going to just do, I'm going to do economics, and I'm going to go get a job at a think tank. And the third one is I'm going to be a dive instructor in Hawaii because that sounds like a lot of fun. Well, those are three options. But if I load your, and I've tried this, So I load my story, life view, and work view into an AI, give it some sense of what my values are all about, and say, generate some options for me in the world of education, in the world of, you know, hospitality, hotels, and things like that, and generate some options in the world of real estate, and generate some options in the world of wellness and health care.
57:24then it'll generate very rapidly five or six more odysseys and not that any of those are going to be what i do i'm just getting more patterns why do i like this one i don't like that one i asked for something in real estate and this looks really boring how could i what is it about either my quest my request thinking that real estate might be an interesting path versus the outcome which not only was boring but distasteful so if I could use if you had confidence that the AI knew at least a little bit about your personality and your ideas and your values it might be an interesting way to generate lots and lots and lots of patterns for options so that you don't end up just choosing between two majors and thinking that that was all you could do.
58:26And then don't worry about it because your major isn't going to matter anyway when you graduate. Yeah. Well, it's really interesting how you can actually explore these things without actually being a lawyer and going to Hawaii. And you can actually just get so many more possibilities and see. But you're also training your emotions because you see the plan and you go, oh, I really like that. Or boy, I really hate that. That's a terrible idea. Yeah. Or, oh, that's a terrible idea, but there's one thing about it I really like. And, again, you can't see yourself by yourself. It's great to have a conversation with somebody else who can sort of push you and pull you and really test your assumptions.
59:06And maybe that's a use case for an AI friend. I mean I just I don't think I can get away from teaching this way because I think it's the way people are going to be learning and so I want to figure out how to do that in a way that actually supports their learning, their growth, their humanity and normally I'd say come to office hours, let's have a conversation but everybody can't come to office hours right, so how do we reach more people you know it's interesting when we first when the book came out lots of colleges called us up and said hey can we teach the class and a lot of them are like you know they're harvard or yale or darbeth or something that's great but you know if you add up all the elite universities all the ivs and stanfords and stuff it's only about 250 000 kids the california community college system just the california community college system is 1.2 million The Cal State University system, the one just below the Berkeley, you know, Cal State system, 600 ,000 kids.
1:00:14I think Texas' community college system is 2 million kids. That's where all the students are. Those are the students I want to have office hours with. I can't have office hours with 2 million students. So how can we help them have the same advantage that you guys get in a class with 30 kids? and I got two instructors, me and one of my staff, and then I have like five coaches.
1:00:45So that's a pretty special experience. But, you know, you paid a lot of money for the school, so we ought to give you a special experience. But how do we get to the two million kids that are in community colleges? And they need the same help. And we've got some data from one of the Cal State systems, Cal State Dominguez Hills down in Compton, California. Dr. Heather Butler, she's one of the psych professors there. She took on the class seven, eight, ten years ago. And she does a lot of research. And she gets better results on GRIT and Martin Sullivan's PERMA scale and Angela Duckworth's growth mindset.
1:01:19She measures all these things before and after taking the class. She gets better results than I get. And our theory is her students are 80 % first gen, 85 % underrepresented minorities. 20 % below the poverty line. They don't have a parent they can ask, what school, what's college for? They don't have an uncle they can say, hey, can you help me get an internship? So they need, you know, they're trying to move from one economic situation to another through education, which is the brilliance of the American education system. And they need a framework. And we give them a framework that's really flexible and workable.
1:02:00so we think that's why you know even that it has nothing to do with with privilege or class or anything else it's like how do you think about your life what are your mindsets and how do you use that to navigate into an uncertain future in a way that's positive and generates more options everybody can generate more options i want the stuff that we're developing to be everywhere so That's my, whatever, my mission is to get it off campus and make sure that no matter where you grew up, no matter what your circumstances were, you can think like a designer. You can be curious. Last question here. You have so many exercises in your books that people can actually try and implement.
1:02:46If there's one thing you would recommend listeners to do after this episode, what would you recommend to them? Well, the big sort of capstone assignment is these three odysseys. But you can't just do that without a lot of preparation and stuff. So I'll take one from our last book, How to Live a Meaningful Life. And it's called Putting on Your Wonder Glasses. I don't have my wonder glasses handy here, but I've got a pair of really goofy glasses. But it's very simple. Take any experience. It's better if you sit outside in nature. Nature is full of all sorts of things that are kind of cool. But you can be almost anywhere.
1:03:20You can be sitting in your room. Just focus on one thing. Focus on something like a flower or something in your room that's interesting. And then just look at it the way you would normally look at it. Your regular glasses are just like, okay, it's a flower, it's red, it's in the vase. The vase is full of water, it's green, makes the red look good. I'm just looking at it with my practical glasses. Now put on your curiosity glasses. Okay, now different questions. well, whoa, the flower's in the vase, it's in water. It's starting to droop a little. I wonder what's going on. Like, I remember I was told you're supposed to cut the edge off the bottom so that the capillaries are fresh, so the water gets up there.
1:04:05Maybe that's what's going on. But the red, which was sort of pink yesterday, it's really red today. I wonder why the pigment is changing, even though it's not connected to the flower anymore. and then this face is green, but it's kind of translucent green. I'm just noticing the glass is a little different. It's so you can see the light coming through it. And I can almost see, you know, so curiosity. Just keep asking questions. Now, put on your wonder glasses, the last step.
1:04:39Look at this red flower.
1:04:43It's effing amazing. I have no idea what makes it that red but when you turn around and you look down into the flower you know as the petals are moving around and in the middle I think there's this stamen and all that stuff that I learned in ninth grade biology but forgetting the names of those things look how beautiful this is and how amazing if you just pay attention to this red in this moment it's it's got to blow your mind like how is it possible that a seed, some dirt a little bit of water all this biomass jumps out of the ground ends up creating this flower which I know is supposed to attract bees or whatever but isn't it interesting and amazing that we evolved to see something this beautiful And so when you move from curiosity to wonder, it's moving from sort of questions to sort of deeply felt observations.
1:05:55So try that. Just take anything you want. Go outside, sit in the nature, whatever you want to do in nature. It's kind of cool because it's full of stuff that's interesting. Just first look at it, regular glasses. Curiosity glasses. I wonder, ask a lot of questions. How did this happen? What does this mean? and then put on your wonder glasses as the third step. Now that you've excited your curiosity about whatever it is you're paying attention to, really go deep in just the sensory nature of the thing, the color, the texture, the smell, the sound, whatever it is. And Arthur Miller, the playwright, said, I can turn anything, even a blade of grass, into the most amazing and wondrous thing in the world.
1:06:38I've tried this experiment a thousand times. It's never failed. And that's where we got this idea. like it's right there in front of you you've been walking past it every day and if you just stop a second and go wow look at that thing you'll have a little moment in your day that that drops all the other stuff the fear the the anxiousness that i'm late for the train whatever it is it'll all compress down to one little moment and you find meaning isn't found in the giant meaning is found in moments and you become a moment designer and you just designed one and then you go on your way to do whatever you were going to do and it's kind of special and you know and there's a bunch of neuroscience about why you now feel better and there's dopamine in your brain and it's been running around and your respiration dropped and all these other biological things happened just because you decided to attend to something wondrous.
1:07:49That sounds absolutely wonderful and I'm so excited for us all to have more wonder in our life. Thank you so much for being on the podcast and I'm very excited to continue following your work and learning from what you're doing. Well, thanks for having me on and I hope to see you in class someday. Thank you.
From the publisher
This week, Katia has a conversation with Bill Burnett, an adjunct professor at Stanford University. He is the co-founder of Stanford's Life Design Lab and also the co-author of Designing Your Life and How to Live a Meaningful Life. In this conversation, Bill shares how we can live in alignment with our values and compass, how prototyping can help us embrace uncertainty, and how to design a life that is more meaningful to us.
Designing Your Life Website: https://designingyour.life/
Bill Burnett’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bill-burnett-4225401/
Bill Burnett’s Books:
Designing Your Life: How to Build a Well-Lived, Joyful Life
How to Live a Meaningful Life: Using Design Thinking to Unlock Purpose, Joy, and Flow Every Day
Katia’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katiakriakova/
Podcast Contact: stanfordpsychpodcast@gmail.com
Podcast Twitter: @StanfordPsyPod
Podcast Substack: https://stanfordpsypod.substack.com/




