Selects: Star Wars Holiday Spectacular

24:56Right. And you see Harrison Ford as if he's flying the Millennium Falcon. And you can just hear the guy off screen going, now look at the camera and just give a nod. Just look at the camera and give a nod. And he finally, you can tell he's pissed off. And he looks up at the camera and just sort of smirks. Yeah, and points at the camera like, okay, I'm looking at the camera. And then goes back to what he's doing. Yeah, it's pretty awesome. I felt bad for him. So early on, Valanche and others kind of— Did you feel bad for him, though, really? Yeah. I mean, like, come on. It's Harrison Ford. It's Han Solo.

25:28He has to go do this for like five days. Yeah. I felt terrible for him. I think it's hilarious that they had to do this, especially now. Well, early on, Valanche and others knew that they may be in trouble because they decided not to subtitle any of the Wookiee dialogue. Right. And they literally started after a brief opening scene setting it up. Here's the basic plot is Han Solo is trying to get Chewbacca back to Kazook in time for Life Day so he can celebrate with his family. That's the basis of the entire two hours. That's the basis of the entire two hours. They encounter a space battle and they're delayed.

26:04And the next two hours are kind of what's going on while the delay is happening. Back on Kazook. Back on Kazook. Because you hear like, oh, okay, well, Han Solo and Chewbacca evading the Imperial Guard and all that stuff for two hours. I would watch that. Sure. I would too. Yeah. That's not what they show. Killing time at the Wookiee household. That is what they show. Yeah. That's what they do. It's people hanging out, waiting for Chewbacca, worrying about him. Yeah. And then killing time while they wait for him to come back. Yeah, literally. So, um. And so, hold on. So you say there's a setup, right?

26:39Yeah, that's the initial setup. And then, Chuck, that's followed by this. Yeah, it's followed by literally 10 minutes, 10 solid minutes of incomprehensible Wookiee speak. So let's join it for a second, shall we? Yeah. Let's all enjoy it.

27:11ICF 말야

27:41And again, you said. 10 minutes, and you're not exaggerating. You're not being hyperbolic. You can time it. It's 10 minutes of Wookiees talking to each other with no subtitles. Fortunately, I couldn't follow it at first. Like, I didn't even know who it was. I thought it might have been Chewbacca's mom and dad. Oh, yeah, that's possible. And little brother. Sure. And I don't find out until later when Mark Hamill shows up via Skype call and says he really explains everything that had just happened. Like, you're Chewbacca's father, Itchy. You're Chewbacca's son, Lumpy. Lumpy. Yeah. And you are Chewbacca's wife.

28:21Oh, Mala. Yeah, thank you. So before everybody starts, like, freaking out, we know that that's actually their nicknames. Their real names are his father is Etichikuk. Etichikuk. It's really hard to pronounce. Mulatto Buck is his wife, and his son is Lumpawarump. as named by Lucas but Lucas also named him Lumpy, Itchy, and Mala so they're all back there wringing their hands trying to figure out ways to pass the time until they get word from Chewbacca that he's made it to what is it, ketchup? Kazook did you say ketchup? ketchup, or catsup if you're fancy but Chewbacca is having trouble getting back to Kachuk because there's a blockade by the Empire and they're looking for rebels, specifically Chewbacca, who I didn't realize this, he's the most famous Wookiee of all.

29:22Did you know that? Yeah, of course. I didn't know that. Well, I mean, he's the only one that really appears in the movies. Yeah, but we're seeing these people's view of the universe. What about back on... Kachuk, yeah. He might have just been a fly-by-night Wookiee. Yeah, but not the case. Very famous Wookiee. Yeah, and he really loved to soak in his fame. All right, so he realizes there's a problem. Valanche, he goes to Lucas and is like, I don't know, man, this is your world, but it may not be the strongest thing to do to set this in Wookiee land and have all this incomprehensible dialogue. And he says he was met with a glacial stare.

30:03Well, he put it a little differently than that. Well, he said glacial stare. He did. the glacial stare that he got was for this quote. He said these people just talk in what sounds like fat people having an orgasm. He goes if you want you can set up a tape recorder in my bedroom and I'll do all of the foleying for it. Yeah he's a large guy. He is. So that's what got the glacial stare. But Valanche later said that from this there was one development meeting that Lucas attended and it was here's the Wookiee Bible. Tell me what you got. And Valanche said he and the other writers and producers and director were just kind of throwing ideas, and George Lucas would either say, like, no, that doesn't work, give them a glacial stare, or say, yes, that's exactly it.

30:49Yes, let's make this a variety show. Yeah, and there was a little bit of background there. The Cantina players in the band had appeared on other variety shows at that point, and I think it went over fairly well just as a short segment on, like, the Richard Pryor variety show or Donnie Marie. Man, there were a lot of variety shows. But that's what I'm saying. That was television. That's what you did. Like the Brady's, the show had its course and then it became a variety show. It was just everybody loved variety shows. By this time though, everybody was sick of variety shows. So it really was a terrible choice.

31:31In fact, they even hired a couple of writers from Shields and Yarnell. Which I hadn't heard of, had you? Oh, yeah. I watched it. It was this creepy, this mime couple who had their own variety show. And they figured these two will be great because they are used to working without words. Right. So, and so there is a certain logic to the variety show. It's not just that variety shows were popular at the time. Somebody was like, well, Wookiees, you don't understand what they're saying, so this is all going to be very physical. So, these people who did, what is it, Shields and Yarnell? Yeah. That's a perfect choice.

32:08That makes complete sense. You can see this whole process of leading up to the point where it was produced and shot and everything. Yeah. A series of like, oh, we have this problem. Well, here's a fix. Yeah. But that leads to another problem. Well, we'll fix it with this. And no one stepping back and being like, all we've done is create a series of problems that are going to come together and make one extraordinarily large problem that will become legendary. No one did that, and so the whole thing was made. That's right, and it eventually airs on November 17, 1978, a Friday at 8 p.m. Eastern time.

32:46That's right, and according to Nielsen ratings, it attracted 13 million viewers, lost the second hour. Just in the U.S. It aired in seven countries total. Yeah, but no one cares about that. I guess not, because none of those are on the Internet, you know? And it finished second to The Love Boat in the second, or I'm sorry, from eight to nine. And in the next hour, it actually finished behind part two of a miniseries about Pearl Harbor starring Angie Dickinson. So it didn't even win their respective hours. No, 13 million, that's not bad. The thing is, apparently, if you look at the Nielsen ratings graph for the first hour.

33:24Yeah, we know about that graph. It's okay. Yeah, we do. And then after a very important part, which we'll talk about soon, it just drops off at the end of the first hour. And that actually probably made the executives at CBS cringe for a number of reasons. Number one is this special was originally supposed to just be an hour. But so many advertisers wanted to sign on that they extended it to two hours. Oh, you can tell. And it shines through. You can totally tell that this thing was never supposed to be. I think an hour might have been stretching it to tell you the truth. Oh, yeah. It's 30 minutes of content, 40 if you're generous, an hour, meh, and then two hours, it becomes one of the worst things that was ever put on television.

34:10All right, well, let's take a break, and then we'll talk a little bit more about the actual, I even don't want to call it content, but it is content in the strictest definition. Sure. Right after this.

34:31What if mind control is real? If you could control the behavior of anybody around you, what kind of life would you have? Can you hypnotically persuade someone to buy a car? When you look at your car, you're going to become overwhelmed with such good feelings. Can you hypnotize someone into sleeping with you? I gave her some suggestions to be sexually aroused. Can you get someone to join your cult? NLP was used on me to access my subconscious. NLP, aka Neuro Linguistic Programming, is a blend of hypnosis, linguistics, and psychology. Fans say it's like finally getting a user manual for your brain.

35:07It's about engineering consciousness. Mind Games is the story of NLP. It's crazy cast of disciples and the fake doctor who invented it at a New Age commune and sold it to guys in suits. He stood trial for murder and got acquitted. The biggest mind game of all? NLP might actually work. This is wild. Listen to Mind Games on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, Kyle. Could you draw up a quick document with the basic business plan? Just one page as a Google Doc and send me the link. Thanks. Hey, just finished drawing up that quick one page business plan for you.

35:45Here's the link. But there was no link. There was no business plan. It's not his fault. I hadn't programmed Kyle to be able to do that yet. My name is Evan Ratliff. I decided to create Kyle, my AI co-founder, after hearing a lot of stuff like this from OpenAI CEO Sam Altman. There's this betting pool for the first year that there's a one-person billion-dollar company, which would have been unimaginable without AI, and now will happen. I got to thinking, could I be that one person? I'd made AI agents before for my award-winning podcast, Shell Game. This season on Shell Game, I'm trying to build a real company with a real product run by fake people.

36:21Oh, hey, Evan. Good to have you join us. I found some really interesting data on adoption rates for AI agents and small to medium businesses. Listen to Shell Game on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. The moments that shape us often begin with a simple question. What do I want my life to look like now? I'm Dr. Joy Harden-Bradford, and on Therapy for Black Girls, we create space for honest conversations about identity, relationships, mental health, and the choices that help us grow. As cybersecurity expert Camille Stewart-Gloster reminds us, We are in a divisive time where our comments are weaponized against us.

37:03And so what we find is a lot of Black women are standing up and speaking out because they feel the brunt of the pain. Each week we explore the tools and insights that help you move with purpose, whether you're navigating something new or returning to yourself. If you're ready for thoughtful guidance and grounded support, this is the place for you. Listen to Therapy for Black Girls on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Lines and Tines with Spencer Graves on the iHeartRadio app is a podcast designed for hunters and fishermen to enjoy success. I like the idea of like, hey, put me on a big deer.

37:42You know, hey, there's a big deer out here. He's doing this. Be looking for this deer. But I also love doing it on my own. I love going out there and saying, running my cameras. I love patterning the deer. I like showing up at the right time, checking the wind, knowing what stand I need to be in. And then whenever it all comes together and it happens, that's the most satisfying thing ever. So when you do it on your own, it's like I then can hang my hat. But if I had somebody say, hey, pull up on these dots and catch them right here, and you're going to win, and then when I go in, it's like, yeah, that's cool.

38:16I won the tournament. The ultimate goal is done. But it's like, dude, when you find them and you make them bite, that's the puzzle. I love it. Listen to Lines and Tines with Spencer Graves on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

38:33Learning stuff with Joshua.

38:44All right. So the show itself, we've given you the main plot line, which again is that Chewie is trying to get back to his home planet to celebrate Life Day with his family. Right. That's it. And again, we almost barely see Chewie. Yeah. The rest is his family on... Kazook. ...waiting for him to come back for Life Day. Yeah. So some of the various things they did, there were guest stars. There was Harvey Korman from The Carol Burnett Show. Okay. One of my all-time favorites. Him or Carol Burnett Show? Both. He's great. Yeah. He actually, if you watch what he's doing, you're like, this guy's a comedy genius for sure.

39:23Well, apparently he too was like the only one on set that was bringing levity. He was joking around and kind of kept spirits up. Good for him. That's what I say. And he had three different parts. Yeah, he played, well, I don't even know the names, actually. We could look them up. But he played a Julia Child-like cook. There's an actual cooking segment. A long one. A very long cooking segment where Chewbacca's wife makes Bantha stew. To kill some time. To kill some time. Both on her planet and in our living room. Yeah, so Harvey Korman is in drag as a four-armed Julia Child-like TV chef. Right.

40:05I think it's Gourmanda is her name. Gourmanda? That makes total sense. Yeah. He also plays, there's this one weird bit where Chewbacca's son tries to figure out a way to trick the stormtroopers. The Empire had come and kind of, because the blockade, raided the house and other properties. So he tries to trick them by, I think, rigging a comlink to speak in a different voice. So he has to watch the instruction manual. He watches an instruction video. Which was Harvey Keitel as a robot. Oh, it would have been wonderful to be Harvey Keitel. Oh, what did I say? Harvey Keitel? Harvey Korman. Oh, man.

40:45Harvey Keitel murders someone in the middle of the instruction. That would have been great. Harvey Korman. And then the final role he had was as a bar patron in the cantina that drinks. He has a hole in the top of his head like a volcano where he pours his drinks in. That's how he drinks. And he loves Bea Arthur. Did we mention Bea Arthur was in it? Bea Arthur is not only in it, Chuck. She sings a song. She does. She is the, unbeknownst to everyone, she manages or maybe owns the cantina. She's the owner. Yeah. What's the Maz what? Maz Def cantina? No, Mostef is a rapper. Oh, yeah. I think you mean Mos Eisley?

41:24Yes, yes, that cantina. She's the owner. Bea Arthur is the owner. Bea Arthur of the Golden Girls, but in this case, Bea Arthur of Maud. Because as one of the people who wrote one of the articles we based this on points out, she's just basically playing Maud as the owner of the cantina. Yeah, and her song comes because they basically say there's a lockdown, so you've got to call last call at your bar. So she calls last call by singing a song to everyone. Right. And again, we can't possibly have the script lead anywhere else but Chewbacca's house while his family waits for it. So all this takes place as part of a public service announcement, basically, broadcast by the Empire about how immoral life on Tatooine is.

42:09So let's go see what's going on in the Mos Eisley cantina as it's being shut down for curfew. Yeah. All right, this is incomprehensible, but it goes on. So there in it, there's also Art Carney. Yes. Of the Honeymooners fame. Probably the star of the whole thing, really. He has the most lines, I would say. The most comprehensible line. Right. So he plays a trader, a human trader, that has recently been with Han Solo and Chewie and actually gets to Kazook and says, they're on the way, it's all good. Yeah, a trader, not traitor. Yeah, a trader is in trades humans for money. No, he sells goods. Yeah, a trader.

42:56He doesn't trade humans. Yeah, he's in the human trade. No, he isn't really? Yeah. He trades humans like he sells humans? I looked it up in the Star Wars encyclopedia. It said that he was in the human trade. Huh. So in this Christmas special, apparently they sanitized his background because he's basically just selling gadgets and novelties and stuff like that to the Wookiees and the Empire who were occupying the area. Yes. He comes bearing gifts. Yeah, because he's a friend of Chewbacca's family. Yeah. So he comes bearing gifts. One of the gifts he gives is sort of like a little digital insert to a, oh, I guess you would call it a virtual reality.

43:40Hair dryer. Hair dryer. Like a beauty shop hair dryer. Right. He gives it to Grandpa Itchy. Grandpa Itchy sits under this hairdryer, pops in this digital cassette, and it can only be described as softcore porn. Apparently, the writers who were interviewed for this said that was totally the intent. They were trying to get what amounted to softcore porn that would pass the censors. That's right. So it's all... You can't even say it's innuendo. It's too obvious and overt for innuendo. Instead, it's just gross. It's really gross. Diane Carroll, who, yes, she is, a Vegas staple, shows up and starts basically tantalizing Grandpa Itchy, who, again, this is Chewbacca's elderly father, who now engages in some sort of, well, he's watching virtual reality pornography now.

44:41And this is a pretty lengthy segment in and of itself. Well, yeah, and she literally says to him, like, now I can see you're really excited. Yeah. It's pretty rough to watch. Yeah. So then you've got another musical number. Because also, again, he shudders. Yeah. It's really strange. All right. So there's also a, I know it seems like we're jumping around, but it's so mind-blowing. No, we're not. Like, this is pretty much like blow for blow. Actually, I forgot earlier on in the special, there's one of my favorite sequences is when Grandpa Itchy goes over to Lumpy and basically sets up. Remember the hologram chessboard that they played in A New Hope?

45:24Yeah. Basically kind of sets that up and says, here, just play this. He pushes the button, which is clearly a 1970s cassette recorder. and another like it's like a Cirque du Soleil acid trip gymnast routine happens in front of the kids eyes and again this all just it's not like it shows a snippet they show the entire segments like 5, 6, 10 minutes long of all of these things so you would think they've gone to this hologram well a couple of times why not go to it again well they do They do. To kill more time while the Imperial Guard is ransacking their house. Art Carney apparently, I guess, is trying to get one of the Imperial Guard, the leader, I think, or one of the leaders.

46:14Who looks like somebody from Spaceballs, by the way. Very much so. And the writer of the Vanity Fair article, by the way, said, this is so incomprehensible, this special is. George Lucas didn't even have the Schwartz with him at the time. So, anyway, Art Carney's distracting this imperial leader while they're ransacking the Wookiee's house, Chewbacca's house, with a hologram. And this hologram, instead of being an acrobat or Diane Carroll or any kind of porn or anything like that, is Jefferson Starship. And they decide that they're going to play Light the Sky on Fire, which apparently is about UFOs.

46:54It's a little music video, basically. Yeah, it's the predecessor to Video Kill the Radio Star, you can tell. And again, it is the whole lengthy song. Yeah. The whole thing. So every time that somebody's like, we need to escape mentally from what's going on here in our house, let's go into the video world, it's not just, and they don't cut back and forth. No. It's, okay, here's five minutes of Jefferson Starship performing this song. Yeah, and even the Jefferson Starship guys were like, you know, it was sort of a weird trip. Like, we didn't get it, but we did it. Right. They gave us some money and some cocaine.

47:35Well, probably so. So we said, yeah. Chuck, I think, though, yet another segment like this is actually widely regarded as the high point of the whole thing. Oh, sure. Agreed. So there is a cartoon, actually. Yeah, that Lumpy watches. Yeah, Lumpy's, like, the Imperial Guard is still ransacking my house. I think I'll entertain myself by watching a cartoon on my little iPad. I don't know. I guess it was an iPad. And he watches this cartoon, and it's actually remarkable for a number of reasons. It's the best part of the whole special. Yeah, generally agreed upon as such, but not just us. And it introduces Boba Fett.

48:17It's the first time Boba Fett ever makes an appearance in the Star Wars universe. Yeah, it's actually not a bad, and you can't find it in the one version I told you to watch. They removed it for copyright, but you can watch a separate version. Right, you can find it on its own. Yeah, and it's very much reminiscent of the cartoon style of the day, like a He-Man or something. For sure. It's even a little more artsy than that. Yeah, but it does have a plot that you can follow that makes sense as a Star Wars thing. And it introduces Boba Fett, like you said, and it's actually not bad. It's like Luke and R2 and C-3PO.

48:52Yeah. And they crash on a planet or something. Yeah, and Han and Chewie are in it. And it's the first time we see, and Darth Vader, it's the first time we see Boba Fett and that he is just doing whatever he can do for money. Right. Like Luke trusts him at first. C-3PO's like, you sure you should trust him this quick? And he's like, oh, 3PO, you and your non-trusting ways. Sure. And then it turns out he's selling them out to the dark side. So it's basically Boba Fett is an allegory for George Lucas himself. So the cartoon comes and goes, and that was the thing that came at about the end of the first hour mark.

49:28And after that, everybody just turned off their television sets. Yeah, I don't remember. Did you watch this when it came on? Yeah, I remember watching it, but I don't remember much about it, like if I made it through at all. I mean, I was 7 and it was on until 10, so I probably didn't make it through at all. Yeah. Plus, you're probably disturbed. Who knows? I just remember that... I'll have to ask my brother. He might have a memory of this. I'll bet he does. I'm sure he met everybody afterward or something like that. You know, he has a picture. Well, he was 10 at that point, so cynicism had become a thing in his life, probably.

50:02By then? Sure. Didn't that, when cynicism kicks in? I can see Scott holding out to 14, 15. Yeah, maybe so. So, Chuck, the whole thing finally does end. And actually, there's a guy. His name's Nathan Rabin. and he writes over at the AV Club. He had a great quote. He basically said that one of the great redeeming values of this special is that it does eventually end. Yeah, you know what the first part of the quote is? I'm not convinced the special wasn't ultimately written and directed by a sentient bag of cocaine. Go read his review of the Star Wars Holiday Special because he goes on to describe exactly what that must have been like, that development meeting where the bag of cocaine is pacing back and forth talking about what should happen.

50:45Right, that's what it feels like. But it doesn't, and it ends even more. It takes this bizarre two hours and wraps it up in just a nice bizarre bow. Yeah, so what happens is eventually Han Solo— Should we say spoiler alert? Eventually Han Solo and Chewie make it to the planet. They park on the far side of the planet because they know the Imperial forces are there. And the exercise will do Chewie good. Yeah, so they have to hike over there. They eventually make it back home. They find the stormtroopers at their house, their tree hut. Yeah, way high up. The paintings that set this up I don't think we mentioned.

51:26I don't even call them matte paintings. It looks like someone painted something on the wall, and they just put a camera in front of it. Pretty much. Yeah. So they get back, and Han Solo hides around the corner. Chewbacca steps in front of his son to protect him. Sure. Han Solo jumps out and the stormtrooper trips over a pile of logs and falls over the balcony. And dies in a holiday special. So not only could he not shoot first with Greedo, but they couldn't even have him wrestle the stormtrooper and throw him off. He trips over a log. Right. And Han Solo has his hands thrown up like, wasn't me.

52:06It might as well have been a banana peel. But, again, this is basically produced by vaudevillians, starring vaudevillians. Why not have the one death take place from basically what amounts to somebody slipping on a banana peel? Exactly. It's a perfect way to end it. So that guy basically represents the end of the imperial threat for the rest of Life Day. Yeah. And we then see Life Day being celebrated, which is celebrated by lots of Wookiees assembling in what looks like a giant Olin Mills portrait. Yeah. And all of them are wearing red robes. Sure. And I know I'm up talking, and it's because my mind is still having trouble wrapping around this.

52:52Oh, yeah. And then Princess Leia comes out with C-3PO. Is Mark Hamill there? The whole gang's there, if I'm not mistaken. Okay, the whole gang's there. And then they all gather around to hear a great quote from Princess Leia, which we will read verbatim. This holiday is yours, but we all share with you the hope that this day brings us closer to freedom and to harmony and to peace. No matter how different we appear, we're all the same in our struggle against the powers of evil and darkness. I hope that this day will always be a day of joy in which we can reconfirm our dedication and our courage and more than anything else, our love for one another.

53:33This is the promise of the tree of life. Cue song. Right. And we should also point out, the tree of life has never been mentioned up to this point. I had no idea what that was. It just makes a sudden appearance at the end. And when you say cue song, by cue song you mean Princess Leia starts singing. Yeah. And apparently that was one of the big contingencies on Carrie Fisher being involved. Yeah. She's going through a phase where she's like, I kind of like singing. Bruce Valanche calls it her Joni Mitchell period. Yeah, and she somehow convinced them to let her sing as Princess Leia. And she does.

54:05And again, I've said that she looks like she's on drugs. This is the point where she really does look like she's on drugs. And it's not just me. Other writers who've written reviews of this, it's really obvious that she possibly smoked a decent amount of pot before she shot this scene. But she sings, okay, it's fine. It's just the fact that Princess Leia is singing. And actually, Bruce Valanche had a really great quote, too. He says that she very much wanted to show this side of her talent. And there was general dismay because this was not what we wanted Princess Leia to be doing. Yeah. She did it anyway.

54:45So the whole thing ends with her singing this song about Life Day. Oh, yeah. Which is set loosely to the John Williams Star Wars theme. Yeah. So along the way, the original director quit. A new director, Steve Binder, was hired to finish the job and bring it in. And he did. Over the original$1 million budget, of course, always. He did bring it in. And at this point, George Lucas, he was working on Empire Strikes Back. He didn't know what was going on. He wasn't around for the shoot. No, it wasn't until it aired, I think, that he actually saw it. Yes, and it was a travesty, obviously. If you haven't noticed that by now.

55:28Critics hated it. Star Wars fans really hated it. Everybody hated it. The people who were in it hated it. Lucas hated it. Even Harvey Korman secretly hated it. Yeah, even Harvey Keitel hated it. Actually, he loved it. But Lucas has been asked over the years about it a lot, and he doesn't talk about it much. But in 2005, and I don't buy this for a second, he says it was an interview. He said, the special from 1978 really didn't have much to do with us, you know. That part is true. I can't remember what network it was even on, but it was a thing that they did. That's a lie. There's no way he doesn't know that was CBS.

56:04Yeah. We kind of just let them do it. I believe that. It was done by, I can't even remember who the group was, but they were a variety TV guys. I'm sure he remembers a few of them. We let them use the characters and stuff, and that probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but you learn from those experiences. Yeah. I think they even used some of the footage from the movie. At the end. It looks like some of the space stuff. It's like a highlight reel of the gang. Well, and during the, it looked like some of the, they had some insert shots of like Imperial cruisers and TIE fighters and stuff. Yeah, and remember when Chewbacca like leans back and puts his hands behind his head?

56:43Yeah, yeah. That's in there. It's like just a highlight reel from the movie saying like, feel like this, go see the movie. Well, and also that means it doesn't match the look of the rest of it at all. Yeah, that's true. It's just sort of inserted in there. They tried. They definitely tried. And George Lucas is totally full of it because in 1987, he told Starlog magazine that the Christmas special would be out on videocassette very soon. Yes. And in 2007, two years after that quote you just read where he's like, I don't even know what you're talking about, basically, He apparently considered releasing the Christmas special as a bonus on the DVDs of the first three.

57:22Right, but did not. Did. And apparently Carrie Fisher told Lucas that if you want me to do DVD extras. Commentary. Yeah, commentary, then I want a clean original copy of the holiday special. Yes. So why? Go ahead. So I can play at parties when I want people to leave. It's pretty great. It is. And there is one of those clean copies that's floating around out there. So you can watch this in its entirety. Some of it, like the cartoon, was removed due to copyright infringement and that kind of stuff. But as is the case with the rest of the internet, you can just go find it elsewhere and piece it together.

58:00There's also the original ads that aired in Baltimore that are just fascinating. Yeah, those are always fun. GM ads, where one of the guys who's in quality control is he says, did you watch it? I don't think I saw that one. He goes, we really care about these cars. That's no jive, man. I'm a GM, man. He's dead serious. They're trying to be hip. Yeah. It's pretty good stuff. Here's my final thought on it. I love it. It does not taint my Star Wars experience or my love for the franchise. Okay. And I'm glad it is out there because it's a fun little stain that shouldn't be taken too seriously, I think it adds to it, actually, because it's campy and awful.

58:49Yeah. And I don't know, somehow that enriches the rest of it. I'm with you. You like it? Oh, yeah. I mean, I watched it twice. I wouldn't have watched it a second. I wouldn't have made it through the first time. Let me take that back. I'm a pro. Yeah. So I would have made it through the first time. I wouldn't have watched it a second time if there wasn't something about it. And I figured out, I think the thing that I like the most about it is Lumpy. Chewbacca's son, played by an actress named Patty Maloney, who frankly is hands down the best actor in the entire thing. She, like her responses and everything is just awesome.

59:24I think my favorite parts are, well, there's a great Wilhelm scream. Yes, I noticed that too. When the storm trooper trips over the log. Jerry would not have noticed it. And then there's a part where all the Wookiee dialogue you can't understand, but there's clearly one part where Itchy and Lumpy are having an exchange where Lumpy, you can make it out, goes, I love you. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I noticed that as well. But it's covered up. But someone was like, we have to have at least one exchange where you sort of know what they're saying. Sure. Or they were like, I think she just said I love you. Should we have them redo it?

59:58And the director's like, no, I want to go. And, Chuck, there's one other thing that I figured out from watching this. What's that? It's not readily apparent. The whole thing is made all the more odd in that there's situation after situation after situation where we, as normal audiences, we're trained to expect a laugh track, but there's not a laugh track. Had there been a laugh track, it might have been less bizarre. But the fact that it's missing just makes your, it agitates the mind. So it's this whole additional element that... It is weird. I never thought about it. There's just weird moments of silence all throughout it.

1:00:34Yeah. Like when Art Carney's doing his thing. Yeah, telling jokes. Yeah. Okay, I agree with you, Chuck. Don't take things too seriously. I think that's the great lesson in this. Yeah. That's the lesson of Life Day. It is. And in 2007, Riff Tracks, the great Mystery Science Theater 3000 guys, Mike Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy, provided audio commentary for the full version of the special. So try and go grab that if you can as well. Oh, you can. It's on their site. Because it's great. I think it's like$8. And those guys are awesome. They are. At least I think Corbett listens to us. So hey, Corbett.

1:01:12You got anything else? No. No, I think we did this. There's some good stuff. Go read the Vanity Fair article, Han Solo Comedy Hour. There's a book called How Star Wars Conquered the Universe that has a very interesting chapter about this. That's where we found it asserted that George Lucas never said that he would smash this thing with a sledgehammer. Right. And there's also an entire website dedicated to it, StarWarsHolidaySpecial.com. Yeah. And if you want to know more about the Star Wars Holiday Special, we have a ton of Star Wars stuff on HowStuffWorks, by the way. Yeah, we have cool sort of fun articles about the Death Star and lightsabers.

1:01:48Videos with Holly Fry from stuff you missed in history class. Yeah, she knows her stuff. She does. So you can just type Star Wars in the search bar at HowStuffWorks.com, and it'll bring up some cool stuff for you. since I said search bar, it's time for listener mail. Hey guys, just finished listening to the Voynich Manuscript Podcast. Found it super interesting, especially the theories on its definition or origin. I know Josh mentioned Chuck's theory of it being drug-induced. It's somewhat surprising or even unlikely given the language in the manuscript follows linguistic laws. Only founded in the past 100 years, but if you think about it, it's tough to stray away from familiar structures, especially for something like language.

1:02:30I think back to when I was younger and friends invented their own languages, or even in writing a song or poetry, creativity can sometimes be limited by what we know. So just thought I'd contribute that to the conversation. Nice, thanks. Big thanks for all you guys do. I found the podcast after moving to San Diego in the last few years for some noise around my apartment. So basically we were blocking out noise. We do that. Which I love. And then as a way to get through traffic on my commute home from work, you guys are far more interesting and enjoyable than television and YouTube videos. I'm sure I've listened to hundreds and will continue to listen to hundreds more.

1:03:04Keep on keeping on. That is from Amy J. Moffitt. Thanks a lot, Amy, in San Diego. Doesn't that mean like Place of the Whales in German or something like that? Yeah. Yeah. If you want to get in touch with us, you can tweet to us at SYSK Podcast. You can join us on Facebook.com slash Stuff You Should Know. You can send us an email to stuffpodcasts at howstuffworks.com. And as always, join us at our home on the web, stuffyoushouldknow.com. Stuff You Should Know is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

1:03:49What if mind control is real? If you could control the behavior of anybody around you, what kind of life would you have? Can you hypnotically persuade someone to buy a car? When you look at your car, you're going to become overwhelmed with such good feelings. Can you hypnotize someone into sleeping with you? I gave her some suggestions to be sexually aroused. Can you get someone to join your cult? NLP was used on me to access my subconscious. Mind Games, a new podcast exploring NLP, a.k.a. neurolinguistic programming. Is it a self-help miracle, a shady hypnosis scam, or both? Listen to Mind Games on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

1:04:29Hi, Kyle. Could you draw up a quick document with the basic business plan? Just one page as a Google Doc and send me the link. Thanks. Hey, just finished drawing up that quick one-page business plan for you. Here's the link. But there was no link. There was no business plan. I hadn't programmed Kyle to be able to do that yet. I'm Evan Ratliff, here with a story of entrepreneurship in the AI age. Listen as I attempt to build a real startup run by fake people. Check out the second season of my podcast, Shell Game, on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Whether it is getting swatted or just hateful messages online, there is a lot of harm in even just reading the comments.

1:05:07That's cybersecurity expert Camille Stewart-Gloster on the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. Every season is a chance to grow. And the Therapy for Black Girls podcast is here to walk with you. I'm Dr. Joy Harden-Bradford, and each week we dive into real conversations that help you move with more clarity and confidence. This episode, we're breaking down what really happens to your information online and how to protect yourself with intention. Listen to Therapy for Black Girls on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.