What kids wish their parents knew about fun | Mila Rojas

0:00Sometimes adults forget how rewarding play is because they are too busy or feel like they have too many responsibilities. They rush to unpack. They ask us to sit still for pictures. They miss the magic because they're focused on planning instead of play. You're listening to TED Talks Daily, where we bring you new ideas to spark your curiosity every day. I'm your host, Elise Hu. It's not often we get to share a talk from a fifth grader on this show, and this one is a good reminder of just how much we can learn from the young people around us. A year ago, Mila Rojas spent a hot summer day at a water park with her dad.

0:40He was beaming, laughing the whole time. A few days later, when he video called the family from work, he seemed like a different person. Tired, less happy. That contrast stuck with her, and it led her to a conclusion that she thinks, And I agree, a lot of grown-ups need to hear. Play isn't an escape from your life. It's a way into it. Adults often tell kids to go play. But for adults, their own play gets buried under schedules, expectations, and pressure to be serious. In this talk, Mila makes the case that play isn't just for kids, and that adults are missing out on one of the best ways to connect with their families and enjoy life.

1:19Part of the problem, she says, has a name. According to the American Journal of Play, adults often have play guilt because their inner voice tells them that play isn't productive and that they should be doing something more beneficial. Mila shares simple ways families can sneak more play into the everyday. No extra to-do list required. As a mom of three daughters, I loved it. And I have a feeling my girls are going to love it too. That's coming up right after a short break.

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4:10And now, our TED Talk of the day. A year ago, I was at a water park with my dad, and we were waiting in line on a huge green water slide that swirled like soft-serve ice cream. It was a hot summer day, and his face was beaming. Even while we were waiting in the long lines, he kept turning everything into a game. like who could slide down the fastest and we were laughing the whole time. He was relaxed and completely himself in that moment just like a lot of kids are when they play. When he FaceTimed us from work later that week I could sense that his mood was different. He was less happy and more tired probably like most adults at work.

4:56That contrast stuck with me. It made me realize that play isn't just a childish activity but something adults need to do to connect more deeply to their families and live life more fully. Adults must add more play to their daily lives. We've all felt that sense of wonder as kids. Finding a new playground, going to Disney, or for Thanksgiving, making the big dinner of pumpkin pie and jello salad, and decorating the table with a fresh linen tablecloth, fancy plates, and silverware that we don't put out any other time of year. But sometimes adults forget how rewarding play is because they are too busy or feel like they have too many responsibilities.

5:41They rush to unpack. They ask us to sit still for pictures. They miss the magic because they're focused on planning instead of playing. I've seen this in my own family. One Christmas morning, I came downstairs filled with excitement. The house smelled like gingerbread cookies, and everything felt special. But when I was opening presents, I was told, don't open the next one, call Grandma to thank her, and smile for the camera. Wouldn't it be better if parents were fully engaged with their families? Present, curious, and willing to explore without worrying about checking something off a list? What if instead, parents had all the really special presents in a scavenger hunt?

6:23Parents should enjoy play, not because it's productive or efficient, but because it's fun. For kids, this happens naturally. When kids play, they swore without worrying about being right, imagining new games, and inventing rules. Play isn't an escape from your life. It's a way into it. Adults often tell kids to go play. But for adults, their own play gets buried under schedules, expectations, and pressure to be serious. According to the American Journal of Play, adults often have play guilt because their inner voice tells them that play isn't productive, and that they should be doing something more beneficial.

7:02As responsibilities grow, play is often viewed as immature, unnecessary, or distraction from getting things done. Over time, that belief becomes automatic. Play starts to feel like a waste, even though it's actually one of the most effective ways humans learn, connect, and regulate stress. UNICEF holds an international day of play to remind us of the importance of play for all ages. But it doesn't need to be so big. Adults don't need to add more things to their to-do list just to benefit from play. They just need to bring up play mindset of curiosity and exploration into responsibilities they already have.

7:43Take parenting, for example. Instead of just managing schedules and routines, what if parents modeled exploring and curiosity? by racing until you could pick up the most toys or clothes, or while washing the car starting a water fight, or after work having a 30-second dance break to your favorite songs? What if before dinner, everyone looks through your pantry or fridge to make a work of art with anything they can find, and you serve it as a fun appetizer for dinner? What if families just take one night a week to play, relax, and have fun together, doing things like setting up a pickleball court right in the middle of the living room.

8:26Tonight, ask a parent to start a themed game night. Ask to plan a family trip so that it has fun activities that both kids and parents will enjoy. Anything to stay connected. In my own family, I've seen a play can have a real impact on adults. I go on the wall with my dad and my little sister. We talk, laugh, and breathe for a moment. instead of rushing through the day, giving him a chance to unwind after work. On Friday nights, my mom and I make pizza together. It's messy and creative, and it reminds her of something she loved as a kid. These moments don't take much time, but they change how we feel afterward, connected and happier.

9:08Kids, we need to remind adults that play again. Parents, what did you love to do when you were 11? Playing doesn't have to be big or perfect. In fact, the more creative it is, the better. It just has to be shared. Because play isn't something we need to grow out of. It's something we need to grow with. It helps us stay curious, connected, and human. At every age. Thank you.

9:42That was Mila Rojas at Play at TED in 2026. If you are curious about TED's curation, please visit ted.com slash curation guidelines. And that's it for today. TED Talks Daily is a podcast from TED. This episode was produced and edited by our team. Aspen Fitzgerald Dorsey, Oliver Friedman, Lucy Little, Shu Han Hu, Debbie Rolfe, Emma Tomner, Connor Titsworth, Tonsika Sungmar Nivang, and Hannah Yu. Additional support from Isabella Aslarona, Daniela Ballarezzo, Valentina Bohanini, Ban Ban Chang, Christopher Faze-Bogan, Cinnamon Horn, Lainey Lott, Matthew Polis, and Yadi Vasquez. Learn more at podcasts.ted.com.

10:27I am Elise Hu. I'll be back tomorrow with a fresh idea for your feed. Thanks for listening.

10:47This episode is sponsored by Ashby. Every talk you hear on this show started as an idea, and every idea that actually gets built needs a team. Today's sponsor, Ashby, is the software that supports hiring for those ambitious teams. Ashby is the all-in-one recruiting platform used by the teams at Lovable, Notion, Plaid, and Clay. If you wish that AI could help you move faster through scheduling and scorecards, that you could find that silver medalist candidate from 18 months ago in a few seconds, or that you had better visibility into the state of your candidate pipeline, Ashby is for you. See why over 80 % of Forbes' top AI companies choose Ashby to hire the best talent.

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