Why body language is the key to self-expression — and hot selfies | David Suh

0:06You're listening to TED Talks Daily, where we bring you new ideas to spark your curiosity every day. I'm your host, Elise Hu. These days, we are all getting photographed so much more than a generation ago. But if you're anything like me, it can feel uneasy to be in front of a camera. What are we supposed to do with our hands? What's my best side? Do I have a best side? In his 2024 talk, TikTok's king of poses, David Suh, has a message for all of us to feel more confident and comfortable in photos. And this advice works even if we're not going to be in front of the camera. After the break. It is so great being up on here.

0:48I also want to make sure I commemorate and take a quick TED selfie. Hold on. Sorry. Don't mind me. What was my best selfie angle again? Anyone else have that question? A few? A few? Okay. Well, it's a question I get asked all the time as a posing coach. It's so silly because it's really simple. There's chin up and chin down. Matter of fact, can we try this from our seats real quick? Everyone just do a simple chin up. Let me take a look, all right? Okay, let me try to figure this out for everyone here. And chin down, yeah? Great, okay. How does everyone look good in both angles? But before I go on to solve the world's mystery of Southeast review today, Let's address the elephant in the room, shall we?

1:38Because I have a feeling that not everyone here is so deeply invested in taking the cutest selfie every day. But that's okay, that's okay, this is still going to be good. Because I'll take a bet in saying that every single one of you here deserves a powerful headshot that not only reflects your identity, but your ambition and success. For the past decade, I've been photographing over thousands of people. Few you may recognize. Celebrities. CEOs. But mainly people. People like you and me who have a simple human desire to be seen and heard. And there's something this external validation-seeking culture of selfies that I learned that this culture hasn't taught me.

2:27is that posing for a photo doesn't have to be this terrifying experience that subjects you to beauty standards. In fact, posing should be natural because it's something that you've been speaking. It's a language you've been speaking your entire life, body language. And I'm here to show you that our body is so interconnected with our hearts and our identity. Perhaps on the chin up, you felt a sense of confidence. Maybe on the chin down, you felt like I was flirting with you from the stage. I told you everyone looks so good here. But how does something so mechanical start to express emotions? It's not voodoo magic because this is something that we can all do, matter of fact.

3:18Let's try this all together one more time. Okay? Everyone this time, just relax your shoulders with me. Yeah? As I take a deep breath through your nose. And out through the mouth. Beautiful. Chin up very slowly with me, feeling powerful. Back down to neutral. Chin down just a touch. Head tilt to the side. Nose around slightly. And just the eyes down towards the ground beneath you. and just the eyes again slowly bringing it up back to me. If you felt something in here, in your body, my friends, you felt a fraction of the power of posing. Just using your chin up. Imagine what you can do when you use your entire body.

4:08By the end of this talk, I want to show you that you can become whoever you want to become through a single pose. But how did David get here? where he can orchestrate a whole room full of beautiful people to just flirt with him in a matter of seconds. It started in high school, not the flirting. It was a passion, it was a simple passion of taking a photo for someone else that they would love. And it's an honorable passion, but there was a big problem. Posing. David, what do I do with my hands? Don't look at me, I'm just a shy Korean kid hiding behind his camera.

4:51But because they didn't know how to pose, they felt awkward, therefore, they looked awkward, and then they saw the awkward photo where they said, oh, once again, I look awkward, further validating their limiting beliefs. But it's okay, because high school David had a solution. He went to Google and typed in top three poses for a woman. Easy peasy, right? Nope. Because David learned that everyone has different body types. I mean, how can he? Okay, that makes sense. But what if David learns the top three poses for every conceivable body types out there in the universe, surely he would be set up for success, right?

5:42Nope. Because even if two people have the same body types, how they perceive themselves and how they want to be seen can be drastically different. This is a problem with today's definition of posing. It boxes you in based on your physical traits and your labels. Ah, you are a woman. This is how you need to present your body. Yeah, let's not get canceled on the TED stage, my first time here. There's a client that taught me this lesson really well. She was an ex-dominatrix, now author. I know, really cool. So she was getting her hair and makeup done. I went over, I said, Miss Client, how would you like to be photographed today?

6:31she looked dead straight at me and said, David, I want to be a bisexual assassin.

6:42Yeah, let's do that. And as I slowly walked out of the makeup room, immense panic just, what does that even mean? David went to his laptop and typed top three poses for bisexual assassins immediately regretted it.

7:09Eventually, I had no other options. I had to trust my process. So David guided her limb by limb intentionally to feel within her body. And I nervously presented a photo to her and she said, David, this is me. I learned that day that it wasn't my job to teach her how to be a bisexual assassin. All I had to do was give her space to be who she already was, the baddest bisexual assassin in the world. It's not about contorting your body to fit someone else's idea of you. It also doesn't matter if you see a version of what you believe is bisexual assassin here or not, because Krista connected with herself.

7:58that is what posing is it's a declaration of self telling the world that you belong that you are deserving of self-exploration self-acceptance and self-expression a playful promise to tell yourself that i will see myself as a work of art a one-of-one

8:21this this is how posing should feel it should feel grounding it should feel empowering. And this is how the shy Korean kid that you saw earlier on came to be him today, me on stage.

8:41I mean, don't get me wrong, both Davids are beautiful, but this David saw posing as a tool to look good, to almost pretend. Me now, I see posing as a way to embody who I've become and who I'm destined to become. So the next time you are in front of the camera, whether it's for a selfie or a headshot, please remember that you deserve to take up space. Shift your balance to comfort your body. And remember David asking you, how are you and your future self showing up for you today in your body? Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

9:27That was David Suh speaking at TED Next 2024. If you're curious about TED's curation, find out more at TED.com slash curation guidelines. And that's it for today. TED Talks Daily is part of the TED Audio Collective. This episode was produced and edited by our team, Martha Estefanos, Oliver Friedman, Brian Green, Autumn Thompson, and Alejandra Salazar. It was mixed by Christopher Fazey-Bogan. Additional support from Emma Taubner and Daniela Balarezzo. I'm Elise Hugh. I'll be back tomorrow with a fresh idea for your feet. Thanks for listening.