The Fifth Annual “My Guy” Fantasy Football Draft With Danny Heifetz, Danny Kelly, and Craig Horlbeck

16:02Bill Simmons:Craig, who's our number one if he can stay healthy guy? McCaffrey. Yeah. Every year he's healthy. He's the best player in fantasy or he misses the entire season.

16:10Danny Heifetz:If it's not him, it's Mike Evans. And if it's not him, it's George Kittle. So I think it's the substation.

16:14Bill Simmons:quadruple down on a whole team of those guys while they play. It's just a parlay of injuries

16:20Danny Heifetz:every year. Where is Conspiracy Bill on the substation in the 49ers?

16:23Bill Simmons:You know, ironically, I want to, Conspiracy Bill, not me, Conspiracy Bill went on the Wait a Second podcast with Jason and Tyler this week. and we talked about it. I'm all in on... Yes. You know, it's one of those things where it's like, yeah, it can't be true. Would you want to play with it? Well, I wouldn't. Would you want to live by that? Yeah, no, you wouldn't. Well, you're a corded headphones guy. I am. A little bit of substation parallels there. It's very early on. Everybody's doing these wireless AirPods. I mean, I also don't wear a seatbelt, so I'm not the greatest guy for self-health, but you wear a seatbelt.

16:58Bill Simmons:I've been wearing it lately and it's, I don't know, I always felt like it was confining. I didn't like - That's the point. Yeah, I know. I'm getting used to it. It confines you from flying through the windshield. Yeah. People really made me feel bad about it in a real way. That's because they care about you. Well, then my wife was like, I've been telling you where to sleep out for the 27 years we've been together and you've never listened to me now. You make a point to note that you can get to Vegas faster than anyone in your car and then you don't wear a seatbelt. What are you doing? Listen, it is confounding.

17:30Bill Simmons:The duality of man.

17:31Danny Heifetz:Have you ever thought about how lame it would be to be dying at 19 miles an hour in the middle of a cryo parking lot? You're trying to... You've been very healthy the entire time I've known you. You're doing all this stuff. And I just fear that you're... I've been wearing it.

17:46Bill Simmons:I'm really trying it. I would not want to play next to the electromagnetic practice field substation, whatever the fuck it is. The video is where you can hear the buzzing from it. Can they at least put a wall up? I hate that you can see it. You want to build a wall? Yeah. Well, just in that one case. But yeah, can we at least conceal it? I don't know why we have to stare at it. Put a tent over it or something. They were talking about an NFL Live yesterday in these grim tones. Like just - This they should. The most grim thing possible. And I was thinking like if I had been on the show, I'd have been like, maybe it's the electromagnetic thing drove him fucking crazy.

18:18Bill Simmons:All of a sudden he's in a trailer park in Ohio. Too much exposure. It's like lead from like the 60s or whatever. Yeah, but maybe he's just lost it. Okay, so our number one, if he stays healthy guy, is still McCaffrey. Yeah. All right. Danny, I could zag on your pick. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe he was just really healthy last year, and maybe he's not really meant to be healthy every year. I know. That is scary. I have concerns about Kenneth Walker. Yeah. Because the rub with him with the Seahawks was always like, we can't count on him for 17 to 20 games. We need Zach Charbonnet. We need insurance.

18:54Bill Simmons:He was a just-in-case-he-gets-hurt guy. Now the Chiefs, who are no stranger to injuries, are now counting on him. But the upside is crazy. That's what I'm chasing, and I admit fully I'm not unbiased on this. I just love him. I think he's just so good. When was the last good running back they've had? Exactly. Kareem Hunt, 2017, probably. Kareem Hunt, rookie Kareem Hunt. Yeah. I don't know. I agree with DK. It's like, don't overthink it. The Chiefs and Mahomes have a really good running back. Yeah. And there's only like 12 good running backs in fantasy, and I think he's one of them. What do you have for your true love?

19:27So I know I kind of just pitched a whole, like, don't buy into preseason hype. Get a veteran. Oh, wow. Be safe. Luther Burton, I'm just obsessed.

19:35Bill Simmons:It's a recurring theme on your podcast. I don't care that he's got a hurt groin. I don't care about any of that. I completely buy it. I think he's like a Manra, St. Brown, mixed with Prime Debo. And I don't know. I think when he was going to— Those are some names right there. Whatever. If he was going to come out of college the year before he did, when he was, like, he wasn't eligible after sophomore year. If he came out that year, he would have been, like, a top 10 pick. And then the Missouri final season wasn't as great. But on talent alone, I feel like we're not, when you watch him, he looks like one of the best receivers in the league to me.

20:05And I fully buy the Ben Johnson thing. There was that big piece on him. I think it was in The Athletic. He's a psycho. I think it's going to be, it's now, like, McVay, it's Shanahan, and I think it's Ben Johnson. And I'm just, the quotes around Luther Burden are crazy. I think he's going to be healthy week one. And I don't know. I think like next year, he'll probably be like a first round pick or something.

20:21Bill Simmons:It was interesting with the rankings. You would have thought Adunze would have been the number one bear and the highest thing, but people, Burden seems to have psyched people out. I think the way, I think Adunze is more, more high variance. Like he, he's getting the deep shots, the, the, the balls that Caleb has struggled with a little bit more. Burden is in that Debo sense, where they're like getting him screens, little crossers, reverses. They just like get him the ball so much. And when the ball's in his hands, he's one of the best players in the league. We have Burden 24 for receivers, and we have a Dunze 28.

20:50Yeah, I'd rather have Burden. I think they're all good. I think the big three on the Bears are all worth taking. But I do think Luther Burden is very special. If you look at his rookie season, people can go nuts on the stats, but it's basically the last 15 years. It's him, Odell, and A.J. Brown in terms of yards per out run.

21:06Bill Simmons:There's some good long-well stats with him. I think he's very special. He really means a lot to you. Well, I'm sticking to my guns, even though his groin doesn't work right now.

21:17Danny Heifetz:Well, speaking of groins, I'm shocked you didn't have Luther Burden for the one of these is the Caleb Wilson, there will be no semen left in my body category. And I just thought that was going to be like a show-in for you. Is this room all-star? I'm reserving that for Drew Aller when he uncorks the 70-yarder. Can we? I'm all the way in.

21:36Bill Simmons:There were like four throws he made in the preseason where I was, it was like, oh my God. He made two throws in the last two weeks that very few quarterbacks have made in the last few years. God, I was going to say it. And he's big, too. He's huge. Cannon. His whole problem was like footwork and can you read a defense? McCarthy getting his hands dirty. It's already kind of paying off. I think you're getting your hands dirty. I am. I'm getting very dirty. No, I got, listen. He looks legitimate. I can't stay in the Steelers, but he looked legit. You can say what you want about him. You have to admit that he looks way better than anyone thought.

22:08Danny Heifetz:Our comp for him coming out of college was if Justin Herbert couldn't hit water if he fell out of a boat. and I mean it's Penn State he broke his ankle I think if he had improved at the end of Penn State like I think he would have been like a way better possible wasn't he supposed to be

22:19Bill Simmons:like a top three pick at one point there was a time he's a Heisman favorite well just because of the tools too I mean he's a big guy with a big arm what round did you get him in? third

22:30Bill Simmons:Steelers are interesting Sal and I are doing Thursday we're doing the two conferences and the win total over-unders and there's some buzz you know every year there's two coaches that take over a new team and it's always pretty easy to identify who the jumps coaches are going to be. Like Dan Quinn two years ago, Brayville last year. A little harder this year. McCarthy coming in and doing better than Tomlin did just seems abjectly insane, but might not be insane. No, I think the offense is objectively going to be better. The offense might be way better. Yeah, and I just think the roster's better.

23:04They just like Michael Pittman, and I think they drafted really well. I think the tackle they took is good. Jeremy Bernard, the receiver seems good. they brought in Brisker and Jamel Dean and their new defensive coordinator I think is going to be better than what they had last year I think they're just a better team

23:17Danny Heifetz:we always joke McCarthy Sean Payton and John Harbaugh just their resumes on paper with wins and losses are almost identical

23:23Bill Simmons:especially the John Harbaugh thing where McCarthy's we've all talked about this on our pods but McCarthy's considered like this retreat and John Harbaugh is like the savior and it's like I don't know how do we know McCarthy is not a better coach I'm down on Harbaugh and I'm up on McCarthy.

23:40Danny Heifetz:So in the name of pronunciation dyslexia, what would happen if I said retreat? You guys are fucking silent. I was biting my tongue. Yeah, that's what I thought. When I said retreat, it's retreat,

23:50Bill Simmons:which is okay because I have pronunciation dyslexia. Heitz is now like attacking Bill every time he mispronounces him. Don't treat on me. I'm attacking you.

24:02Danny Heifetz:I'm attacking you two for not saying anything to him. Look, I bit my tongue on that.

24:06Bill Simmons:Call me out every time. for some reason I said retread and it's retread

24:10Danny Heifetz:Scarcity's my favorite one you have Scarcity I have them too I can't say anything right so it's okay Scarcity's like a British accent thing maybe he was doing

24:18Bill Simmons:I think Scarcity should have been the way it's pronounced how about that my one true love I can't wait because I want to give you credit last year I believe it was Jackson Smith and Jigba was like your big guy last year no big deal I kind of poo-pooed that I think we were talking about that last night we were like Bill pick JSN I had some good ones last year the last two years what do you think my one true love is this year if you had to guess oh well I think it's AJ Brown what do you think Craig he's looking up I mean AJ Brown would make sense for you probably uh Abuka what do you think

24:52Danny Heifetz:I would have said Abuka before the toe injury now I don't know he was my crazy pills guy last year okay

24:58Bill Simmons:my one true love is AJ Brown oh I am all the way fucking in on this. He destroyed the Eagles last week. They were Pat's reporters tweeting stuff out like, in all the years I've covered the team, I've never seen anyone dominate the joint practices like A.J. Brown just did. This guy's unleashed. It might just be one year. Or it might just be one game when they played the Eagles in practice. No, stop.

25:28Danny Heifetz:You know I'm not just being like, oh, Patriots. I hate the Patriots. He's my crazy pills guy. I don't understand why everyone's not in on A.G. Brown.

25:38Bill Simmons:He was in the worst possible situation with this weird Eagles offense that used him. They won 11 games. They used him. Stop it. He was one of the worst picks in fantasy. So frustrating. I'm not going to stop it. Danny, would you go 50 % completely used wrong with him? I think he just checked out, which is what worries me. Stop. I don't blame him. Point. He did check out.

26:00Danny Heifetz:No, but that's the point. I think he have checked out. Because they were using him right. Exactly. And I think it's George Pickens this year. He's not a winning team. They're like contenders to go to the Super Bowl.

26:09Bill Simmons:He wants the ball. He's one of the worst offenses in the league. He wants the offense built around him, and he's going to get it now with the New England Patriots.

26:15Danny Heifetz:I 100 % agree. Receivers are more like NBA players than football players. They want the ball. They couldn't get him the ball. And it's George Pickens, where he's a head case that gets his head on straight. Drake May is a better overall passer than Jalen Hurts. You have going from Kevin Petula running the offense in Philly to Josh McDaniels in New England, who doesn't have to compare him to Randy Moss in 07, But Devonta Adams got like 1 ,500 yards at 31 years old, Josh McDaniels and the Raiders. And you look at this Eagles team. Wait, you left out two other key points.

26:42Bill Simmons:Mike Vrabel, who he loves. Obsessed with him. Grew up as a Patriot fan. Like this is like I got divorced with the wife I never liked, and now I'm dating somebody, and I've lost 20 pounds, and I have a new haircut, new clothes, and I'm just so fucking happy. This is A.J. Brown right now. Anyway, keep going.

27:02Danny Heifetz:No, it's fine. There was just an easy layup there that we're all going to just pass over. What was the layup? No, it's okay. You thinking Vrabel? Yeah, well, he just went from Vrabel. It's fine. But the... Bill? Bill?

27:19Danny Heifetz:Anyway. No, but to your point about using A.J. Brown around the offense, just powering through, but if you look at the top 120... Anyway, my pro football focus stats, but the 120 top receivers last year, if you just look at how often they were in the slot, A.J. Brown was last.

27:36Bill Simmons:I would say he was used incorrectly last year by them. The guys should get 8 to 12 touches a game. Craig's not, well, you might be old enough to remember this when Randy Moss came to the Patriots. Yeah, yeah, I'm familiar with that season. How old are you? I was 13. Yeah, you remember.

27:51Danny Heifetz:You remember the Giants beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl? Yeah, it was that game.

27:54Bill Simmons:We got Randy Moss, I think, for a fourth-round pick from the Raiders. and everybody had decided Randy Moss was no longer redeemable as a professional athlete and he mailed it in with the Raiders. Meanwhile, if you go back and look at that Raiders team, he's playing with crap QBs, crap situation and he's just unleashed when he gets to the Pats. I really think this is going to happen with AJ Brown and for some reason, everybody's talking about with the Pats, like, oh, the schedule is going to be so much harder, but the Pats are just distinctly better than they were last year. Depth is probably the biggest issue, but their offensive line is going to be better.

28:30Bill Simmons:It's the second year with the coaching staff. And they have A.J. Brown and Romeo Dobbs. Their best receiver last year was Diggs, who played 35 snaps a game. They just traded Kayshawn Booty, who was their second best receiver. They basically traded him for a backup safety and a six-round pick. They had terrible receivers last year. And I just think he's going to be awesome. And I don't know if it's going to last more than a year. It might just be one year, and then next year he's unhappy, wants an extension, like whatever. This year he's going to be happy. I agree with that. I totally agree. You shouldn't say that your crazy pills guy is also AJ Brown, but in the other direction.

29:07Yeah, I had AJ Brown crazy pills.

29:09Danny Heifetz:I sit next to these two guys all day long and they just can't stop talking about AJ Brown. I'm just like, do you remember what happened last year at all? He was one of the worst guys to have in fantasy. He was the most frustrating player to have in fantasy.

29:20Bill Simmons:He was absolutely miserable and seemed like he was trying to get traded during the season. He was reading books books on the freaking sideline he was completely checked out i just think we're kind of like

29:30Danny Heifetz:selectively forgetting that why would he be checked out again that's the point he's saying to prove yeah but he i mean what he they were on again they were on a competing team that had a chance to be like a super bowl contender all the offense was so limited he literally tweeted to quote aj brown quoting jesus if you're not welcomed not listened to quietly withdraw don't make a scene shrug your shoulders and be on your way that's not the guy i want to bank my entire season So you're saying that the fear is if he doesn't get targeted enough, he'll just bail. Yes.

29:58Bill Simmons:Well, they traded a first for him. DK counter. He's going to get targeted enough. I know, probably. You're going to throw him the ball all the time. I'm pushing back a little bit on the hype, that's all. I feel like I'm taking... Is it hype, though? I don't feel like there's been enough hype. I don't think there's any hype. He just hates that I like A.J.

30:12Danny Heifetz:Brown. That's it. You're tired of me liking A.J. Brown.

30:14Bill Simmons:Like ESPN did that Jeremy Fowler piece where they did the top 10 for each position. And that A.J. Brown ninth, which is like he should be in the top 10. The Patriots didn't have anybody in the top 50 last year. No. They didn't have anybody who could get open. Seattle's whole strategy was like, these guys can't get open. We're going to do this. And they just pulled our pants down for four quarters. How many receivers would you take ahead of A.J. Brown in fantasy draft? I think he has to be top five. So you have Jamar Chase. I would take him over Jefferson, FYI. Yeah. I think that's fair. I'm going to trust the Kyler Murray, J.J.

30:47Bill Simmons:McCarthy, however that plays out combo, over the Patriots with Drake May, who throws the best deep ball in the league? I don't have a problem with that. So you would do Jamar Chase, Puka, Amon Ra. You would take those guys over A.J. Brown? And then it's like Justin Jefferson, CeeDee Lamb, JSN. Would you take Puka over A.J. Brown? I'm just asking. I would. Talk about red flags, Danny. I mean, yeah. But when Puka's on the field. Name one thing. I mean, first of all. I thought Puka was the best receiver in the league. The biggest red flag is going on Logan Paul's podcast. That's the biggest red flag.

31:19Yeah, well. Matt Stafford is the kingmaker. I mean, look back through his career. Like, the Cooper Cup triple crown. Receivers need to be crazy. Puka Nakua, if he's healthy and playing, which is obviously like a big if, he is going to be the highest scoring receiver. He outscored JSN last year.

31:36Danny Heifetz:You always make the good point that Stafford is for the top 20 fantasy receiver seasons ever. I would take Puka. Stafford is going to feed him.

31:43Bill Simmons:I mean, I'd probably take Puka too. Push comes to shove. but the red I mean he was like I'm fine I'm fine I got my shit together and then there was a story out that he walked through a glass door at the Michael Rubin White Party which he told he himself told us he didn't call that two months ago I'm like why would you say that on a podcast stop going on podcasts

32:04Danny Heifetz:he said this week he started talking about McDonald's and I'm like who's allowing him to do these media if we had a ringer

32:09Bill Simmons:Christmas party and Craig walked through a glass door and then I go on Logan Paul's pod and I'm like last month was crazy I ran through a glass door. But he's supposed to be getting his shit together. And then he walked through a glass door. That was months ago. No, it wasn't.

32:22Danny Heifetz:It was July 4th. Well, it was less than two months ago. The problem with the deep ball tracking is you can't be like, well, my eyesight's not good. Because you're a receiver. You know, he definitely saw the glass window, right? Right. It's clear. It's a really nice party. You make a key point, though.

32:37Bill Simmons:Do you need to be crazy to be a receiver like that? Like the way Puka played was so reckless and so crazy that maybe that's part of how he's successful. Or maybe it's all of it. Every time he catches a pass, I'm worried he's not going to get up. Yeah, he peels himself off the turf six times a game. Nobody is as good as him when he's healthy. All right. We are going to take a break. Quietly withdraw. We're going to quietly withdraw and come back with the rest of the categories right after this. This episode is brought to you by ChatGPT. Imagine you're running a professional sports team. Nice. That would be a dream of mine.

33:14Bill Simmons:Imagine the player contract report is due today. Not so nice. You've got performance notes from the coaching staff. You've got a salary spreadsheet from your analyst. Three rounds of back and forth emails with the agent. And all of it is scattered absolutely everywhere. Well, that's where chat GPT work comes in. It's a new way to use chat GPT for bigger multi-step projects. Give chat GBT work access to your apps and files and can create real work documents. For instance, spreadsheets, slides, structured reports. You can bring all those to your next meeting. And when you don't need answers, you need help just getting the work across the finish line.

33:52Bill Simmons:Guess what? Chat GBT work can move your projects forward while you stay in control. Put chat GPT to work on your most ambitious ideas and projects. Get started. Just go to chatgpt.com by selecting work mode available on plus and pro plans. All right. So because we're live on Netflix, we have polls. We have a first poll. What's the first poll? We asked people to vote on our one true loves and I guess who they agreed with the most. The winner was Brock Bowers, 46 % of the vote. Then AJ Brown at 22, Ken Walker at 19, and Luther Burden at 11. Everyone's wrong. what if he sees him 11.8 % of people Craig's feelings are hurt we're not even done with the pod yet don't take him one of the best things about having Brock Bowers is when they go to him after the touchdown and he's just bald and looks like a fucking maniac hey now and he's just like high-fiving dudes and just looks like he's being cast in some action movie all he cares about is ball he would have been such a good raider in Oakland such a bummer next category you know what I mean yeah he would have next category my bear from obsession crazy pills guy we're named after bear from obsession okay crazy pills for bear uh craig who do you have for this um i feel like i'm taking crazy pills with people drafting zay flowers the ravens receiver so high i'm like what are we why are we in on zay flowers like what's changed this guy like i don't know what's crazier where he's going in drafts or the contract the ravens gave him four years 140 million that's that's that's keegan murray money on the kings Come on.

35:31Bill Simmons:I felt the same way. Yeah, totally. I thought it was so weird, the contract. He's never had more than five receiving touchdowns in a season. And I guess, like, sure, the new offensive coordinator's going to be cool. He's like 5 '8", 180 pounds. So you're saying he's basically the Amy Adams of fantasy receivers? Oh, what? Amy Adams just— Can't be an A-lister, but you know the name. A lot of Oscar noms doesn't win. Has she ever won? I think Zay Flowers can be on Cape Fear in 10 years. People wondering what's happening. I didn't have this pointed this out. Zay Flowers is the only Ravens receiver ever to make a pro bowl.

36:04Did you know that? Ever? Ever. One. He made one pro bowl and then they gave him$140 million.

36:09Danny Heifetz:My theory is twofold. One, I think that the Ravens gave Zay Flowers this contract because they're like, this is the best guy we've ever seen. And they haven't seen enough people. But my real theory is because the Ravens were the Cleveland Browns and the Ravens scouting system was set up in a Belichick-y way. I think that it's Bill Belichick's fault the Ravens can't track wide receivers.

36:26Bill Simmons:Another reason to blame Bill Belichick. sitting here watching on Netflix. Yeah, we're getting so creative on this. Danny, who do you have? Well, I had A.J. Brown, but I want to pivot a little bit here to the other guy that I kind of am not crazy about is Cam Scadaboo with the Giants. I feel like I'm taking a little bit of crazy build sitting next to these guys, going all in on this maniac who played, what, six games last year before he got hurt? I want that crazy bastard. He's like a kid in Toys R Us. I can't be around him. He's a maniac. Yeah. Derogatory. You need that. No, derogatory.

36:58Danny Heifetz:I like in the words of Bill Parcells, football is not for the well adjusted. I just think I just think a kid who would used to run into telephone poles for fun. That is exactly the type of player you want. He's going to get hurt is what I'm saying. I mean, yes, it is like a good football tree. I agree.

37:14Bill Simmons:He's he's on my D &D list. Really? Stop. You still like fun. No, he's fun. I like running backs that might play 10 games. Yeah. Yeah. I don't trust him at all. I think that's a good one. He's being treated like he's a top 20 running back, right? Yeah. I think he should be. I mean, when he's in, he is a top 20 running back. I will defend you guys on that. But I just don't know. I can't trust it for the whole season. He's been preparing his whole life to withstand concussions. He is the guy. He flies too close to the sun on every game. Yeah, we have him 18. At running back, yeah. We have David Montgomery 20 and Cam Scadaboo 18.

37:50Oh, I would rather have Cam Scadaboo.

37:52Bill Simmons:I'll take the David Montgomery 12 points a week for the entire season. Look, if you're not first, you're last. Come on. Like, this is... All right. Also, the Giants, not for nothing, last five years are 30th in touchdowns. Do we think that's going to change dramatically this year? John Harbaugh, baby. John Harbaugh is going to get fired before he started playing Lamar. And then Matt Nagy will be the head coach. It'll be great. Yeah. I think it's red flags galore. All you have is the, oh, one score of games. Bad luck last year. It's going to be better. That's like the only case for the Giants. I don't know if John Harbaugh is any better or worse than Brian Dayball.

38:28Danny Heifetz:I'm not as excited about the Giants as everyone. It's always a red flag when you hire a coach and everyone unanimously is like, this is the most amazing hire. What a great job. And then the fans of that team are like, good luck. Yep. The Ravens fans are not upset. There's some Pete Carroll Raiders parallels to Harbaugh this year. Talk about his speech. Talk about his speech to the team. Did you see the speech that Harbaugh gave the Giants? Oh, of course. It was awful. He just kept saying, you guys are the New York Giants. He had nothing else to say. It was worrying.

38:58Bill Simmons:it's a little worrying i'm worried i think when the fan base that you get the person or coach from the reaction the fan base i remember this happened 20 years ago with jd drew with the red sox when i can't remember who's phillies or the cardinals but all their fans are good luck dude i got so many emails about like you're gonna hate him i was like oh no did we and it turned out

39:18Danny Heifetz:we did hate him i was at so mallory rubin throughout the first pitch at the orioles game a few days ago that was amazing and i got to go and they did this giant meet and greet with all these house of our fans and some of them listen to our show and they came up i could in baltimore i could not believe six different people brought up daniel filele the backup guard of the giants who started for the ravens and ruined their season last year and they were like god can you believe harborough brought him with him like he still doesn't know and i'm like when people are bringing up your backup right guard to you yeah that's a horrible side who do you have for they just traded him for what it's crazy well they traded the jaguars because he got he blew he almost he blew a block in the preseason My crazy pills guy is A.J.

39:57Danny Heifetz:Brown. I just don't understand why people, I won't name any, but why people think A.J. Brown has a physical issue with the Eagles. I'm like, he had a focus issue. Didn't he also have a physical issue? He has a chronic knee issue, but he's also had 1 ,500 yards with that issue. So that's something. He was second in yards per route run two years ago at a puka. What about last year? Jalen Hurts couldn't get him the ball.

40:19Bill Simmons:Sure, okay. I have a deep cut crazy pills guy. It's Parker Washington, but not for the reasons you think. Oh, interesting. Parker Washington. Craig alluded to it earlier. Like, a lot of buzz. People love him. And now there's a Parker Washington backlash to all the buzz. People thinking, this is crazy. Parker Washington. I had Parker Washington in fantasy. It's great. He was fucking awesome. Wonderful experience. He was unleashed. Yeah. And, like, we have him. We have him at receiver 30 for 13 bucks. And he's right in that no man's lane. It might be, oh, maybe Myers. And he might be the third best Jag.

40:54Bill Simmons:Lawrence loved this guy. He threw to him all the time. He was always open. I actually feel like he can sustain that for the whole year. And to me, like the fact that Zay Flowers is considered a better fantasy receiver than Parker Washington, I don't get it. I watched it. I was very focused on him. It was a little like the JSN in 2024 where it was like, I had him on the team and I was just watching him get open every, every play for eight weeks. That was why I had him as my crazy pill guys last year. I just, I think that offense is going to be maybe even better than it was averaging, what, 32 a game for the last eight?

41:30Bill Simmons:Like, I don't like their defense. Their schedule is really hard. They have six home games, basically. They have nine road games and two in London. Oh, they have two in London, yeah. Bonkers. They have six actual games in Jacksonville, so and there's some harder schedule of that, but I think he's going to be awesome, so that's my guy. I totally agree. I think it's honestly, he was a six-round pick and he's not famous, and people are unwilling to admit that he's good. And it just takes longer for guys who aren't first-round picks. Yes. The way that Cohen talks about Parker Washington is like he's his favorite player on the team.

42:01First guy in, last guy out. And he has that sixth-round dog mentality. The chip on his shoulder. Yeah, the chip on his shoulder. It's like the Amon Ra thing. I totally agree.

42:09Bill Simmons:Very similar to St. Brown. Very similar to JSN. I just think he gets better the next couple years because of the workout thing. He's just always open. I've always gravitated to the receivers that are always open. That's why A.J. Brown who I know can make catches in traffic and stuff, but if they use him correctly, he's just going to be open over the middle. Anyway. He's one of those guys that... I thought that would be more controversial. Well, because I think we all like him. I think the question is, is the hype pushed him up too high? Yeah, it's like, how early are you going to have to... There's a lot of miles to feed that offense.

42:39Bill Simmons:My zag is, I don't think the hype has pushed him up far enough. I think he is a top 15 receiver and I think he's the best receiver on that team and it's not close. Yeah. Like, we all had... Well, we'll talk about Brian Thomas Jr. later. Okay, next category. The, my hate, I absolutely hate myself for doing this guy. This is always a live category. What do you got, DK? Jalen Waddell for the, for the Broncos. I have like a long running bit now that I just refuse to take any Sean Payton team players because he, you know, just kind of decides who he wants to feature in any game or any week. And then throughout the year, these guys are not playing enough snaps and everything.

43:17But I've, I was the Jalen Waddell defender last year when he was on the Dolphins. And now I feel like I just have to be the Jalen Waddle defender on a much better team. You're pigeonholed now. Yeah, a much better team, better quarterback situation. They're going to pass more. They're going to score way more points. I think we're going to finally see the real true version of what Waddle could be as like a former, you know, he was like a top 10 pick in the draft. The way that they're going to deploy him, I think, could be really big. Like basically last year he was running routes as an X and now he could be off the line, moving around, run after the catch.

43:47just let Cortland Sutton run like those outside routes and have him more in the slot where he can have a little more space. I think he's just going to be highly featured in this offense. And he's another guy, if he stays healthy, he's going to score a lot of points. And I kind of hate myself for falling for a Sean Payton guy again. But I guess I can convince myself that he's not the play caller for the first week, at least. Waddle is one of the fantasy darling. The analysts really love Waddle.

44:12Bill Simmons:Mina was big on him in Denver. It seems like all the nerds really yeah that's called Mina a nerd even though I think she's probably the nerd queen you in Jeopardy you're a nerd I think that's fine I think everybody's like this guy had Tua as his quarterback last year so nobody's more prepared for a Bo Nix ball that's sailing over his head trying to make a crazy play right but yeah it seems like a good spot for him I had Jalen Waddle in this category too really

44:36Danny Heifetz:I had Jalen Waddle we literally have disagreed Jalen Waddle for the entirety of our show Craig and I we joke about the Waddle model which is like they have the little projected points next to the guy's name and if it gets under that number, you're furious at that person and Jalen Waddle never hits that number ever. Like Yahoo never learns about Jalen Waddle. Like it always says he's projected like 12 points and you're like, great. And then he scores six every week. And you're like, stop projecting him for 12. You're ruining my life.

45:00Bill Simmons:I've spent so much time in my life getting furious at fantasy model for predictions for what's going to be this week. It's hard not to let it influence you. How are we not better at this in 2026?

45:11Danny Heifetz:I don't know. It's infuriating, but I'm afraid. This was Drake May last year.

45:15Bill Simmons:He was always too low. the Drake May stats it's like Drake May's one of the top five fantasy guys you have him thinking he's gonna score 12 points this week it's almost like they decided at the start of the year what the projections are gonna be for each game and they never change it despite how they're playing

45:28Danny Heifetz:I'm afraid but we hate Jalen Waddell for that reason and I never wanna take him he's been brutal I'm in on him this year because and I hate myself for it but God he's been playing with Tua and Tua I think might be even so much worse than we even realize and part of me thinks Mike McDaniel might be a genius after watching him without Mike McDaniel for like two preseason games. I mean, Tua's going to be the first quarterback to lose a quarterback battle where the other guy couldn't even practice.

45:54Bill Simmons:Not to step on Thursday's pod, but that's my biggest position on and under is the Falcons. Yeah, we're joking. I just can't believe how bad their quarterback situation is. Michael Penix beat out Tua in a quarterback competition that Michael Penix wasn't even in. He wasn't playing. He was hurt. He wasn't practicing. And he won the battle. The Falcons are like, he can't tear his ACL again. He's torn it three times. There's nothing left.

46:14Danny Heifetz:Just an empty cartilage. but I just think Waddle going from Tua to Denver with Bo Nix and then also Matt Harmon did a great job pointing this out at Yahoo where I mean Tyreek Hill did all the fun stuff at yeah with everything in the Miami offense for so long and now Jalen Waddle is going to be the guy and it's as simple as Jalen Waddle was on the line of scrimmage and he was playing the X receiver and he was outside and now Jalen Waddle is going to be off the line of scrimmage so no press coverage no getting hands on him early and then he's going to be in the middle of the field in the slot so you can go as you always joke Craig when you're in the slot you can go right or left instead of just out of bounds or left.

46:48Danny Heifetz:And that, those two differences of no Tua and you're going to be in the slot without dealing with press coverage and he's so fast. I just,

46:55Bill Simmons:he's... I'm always, one of my weaknesses with fantasy is I overrate concussion guys. I did this with Olave, like he was a D &D for me last year. Waddle's had a couple.

47:04Danny Heifetz:Yeah.

47:05Bill Simmons:That was, I think, why his stock kind of plus his quarterback situation. But then a couple years passed where you don't have one, nobody thinks about it anymore. But he has had a couple in the past. I do agree though. Olave's a guy where I'm like, I hope somebody else takes him. Yeah. I don't dislike him. I just probably want somebody else to take him. I kind of feel that way about Waddle. Did you go yet? No. This is the, I absolutely hate myself for doing this. Yeah. I'm going to do Rasheed Rice. I'm going to take the guy who had to rehab his knee in jail. Right. Which sounds like a plot of The Longest Yard.

47:39Bill Simmons:I think that happened in shot color. Look, man, I don't know why, but I've had Rasheed Rice on my team every year. And every time that guy's on the field, he's awesome. And the Chiefs, once again, have no good receivers and didn't do anything to add to it. And like, he already came back from the ACL last year and was immediately good. And he's just going to be on the field again this year. And everybody thinks he looks fat and slow and trick camp. I don't care. Rasheed Rice is good every time he plays. He's like a top five guy literally every time he plays. They feed him. Yeah. It is one of those things where if you have him and then he plays and he has like the eight catch for 120 and just it's like he can't be stopped and you're like, oh my God, I just won my league.

48:16Bill Simmons:Yeah. And then the red flag's next to him two days later. 100%. Or he's on TMZ. You know he's got his last 17 games, he has 120 catches. Last 17. He's really good. Yeah, I had him last year for a while and it was glorious. Yeah. The Chiefs are really the Niners of the AFC with Yeah But guys. Mahomes coming off an ACL. Kenneth Walker, durability. Kelsey, 35, has the dad body now. and probably doesn't even want to play football anymore. Rasheed Rice. Worthy. Worthy, who got hurt in the first half of the first game last year. This new rookie that everybody's trying to get us excited about. Cyrus Allen.

48:55Bill Simmons:Yeah. Do you buy in on that? No. Okay. My guy. There's always a Chiefs, like, fifth rounder. They always do this. They always do this. My guy is... I love Judkins. Oh, interesting. And I'll go further. Did not see that coming. I absolutely hate myself for doing this, guys. Judkins, Concepcion, and Boston. Oh, wow. I like the Browns skill guys. Then you throw in Fannin, it's like, I'm in. Who's the quarterback? Oh, no. Oh, no. I thought Judkins had a stretch last year where he was completely unstoppable. And they had no quarterback. I don't even think their offensive line was very good. And he was just fucking Derek Henrini.

49:38Bill Simmons:100%. Everybody he played. Yeah. And now I was more excited for him 72 hours ago because I think he just randomly didn't show up for a practice the other day. And there's concerns about his professionalism. And he could easily also be out of the league in about, you know, nine months. But that guy is one of the eight most talented running backs. And then you throw in the two rookies they got in the second round, the 30s. Those guys are monsters. Concepcion? They look like they're going to use him almost like old Percy Harvin style or Shahid style. And then Boston, the equalizer, has been a revelation so far.

50:15Bill Simmons:So, man, if they can just get a C-minus, a quarterback, I think that team is unleashed.

50:20Danny Heifetz:Are you excited about Deshaun Watson giving them a C-minus? Are you excited for that one?

50:23Bill Simmons:I think he's going to play two weeks and they're going to bench him for the home game. Right. Yeah. I think it's the last guy. Because he's working remote this year. And that's the thing that the owner is telling them to do this. Yeah. The owner's like, you got to at least play him for the two games, see how it goes.

50:35Danny Heifetz:Deshaun plays remote and then Shadour Sanders will go to the office and actually work in Cleveland. Yeah. But I do think, what's your favorite part? it's the lack of professionalism it's the broken leg he's coming off of it's Deshaun Watson at quarterback and then the other part is that I always think of as underrated with the Browns every game they have is outdoors in like snow or rain weather from week 9 on they literally all the good weather cities are coming to Cleveland and all the bad weather ones are there on the road so it's just like the lake effect snow hits in Thanksgiving and you're like oh my god yeah you stole my answer for the next category

51:03Bill Simmons:we have them 22 come on really they're not gonna are they gonna be in the red zone I'm just telling you You know what the end zone looks like? He hates himself for it, Craig. It's true. He hates himself. I mean, I think the Browns... DK knows. You've obviously crunched some Judkins footage. I mean, I love Judkins. He's great. He's really good. He's fucking awesome. One of the more under-the-radar rookies from last year. I totally agree. But I feel like the Browns are just a classic, like, year away from being a year away. There was one game where I bet against them in the second half of this season, and he just kind of took over the game, and it was like, oh, my God, they can't fucking tackle this guy.

51:36Bill Simmons:He's one of those, so... And then the other two, that team is I just wish they had a normal quarterback that team would be one of those like I want everybody on that offense 100 % totally agree speaking of that the next category is I'm staying away from that whole team team Browns do you have the Browns? I was going to say is this Giants and Jets are just the two answers to this? it's the Browns for you guys? oh yeah I'm picking the Titans yeah that's fair not buying the Tate stock No, I'll take a year off on Tate. I'm not buying Cam Ward. I don't want Tony Pollard. Wandale Robinson. Yeah, people like Raheem was trying to get the worst to first game wagon going for Titans.

52:23Bill Simmons:Is Cam Ward good? That's a good question. His stats were awful last year. I know that it was a rookie bad team and all that stuff. The coach got fired. I don't know. His stats were bad. If I'm wrong and Dayball fixes Cam Ward, I'm happy to take that L, but I don't think I'm... Also, you're in a division with Houston twice. They have a couple other good defenses to play against. Don't they go against the NFC North? I think they do. I had this somewhere. But yeah, I didn't like some of the defenses they were going against. So you had the Browns? Yeah, I had the Browns too. And you had the Browns too?

52:55I mean, he stole my answer. It was basically that in addition to the quarterback situation, which is atrocious, terrible, and I really like all these skilled players. Love Casey Conception. Love Boston. Love to hear that he's doing so great. I just think I'm going to wait on all these guys until next year when they have maybe hopefully a quarterback high in the draft or whatever.

53:13Bill Simmons:Well, my thinking is like, I feel like you get all these guys for dirt cheap. That's true. After the 10th round or in an auction, none of these guys are going for more than$5. I don't think anybody's spending$25 on Judkins. Probably not, yeah. But the eight out of the last nine games outdoors in cold, either at home or in cold weather city like Cincy, Baltimore, and New York, this is just having a Browns player late in the season sucks because it's like oh there's going to be three feet of snow and it's going to be a three to nothing game or whatever it's week 15 and it's like I need Shador Sanders to throw for 400 yards in the snow it's like he's going to pass for 125 maybe that was the beginning

53:55Danny Heifetz:of the year of CR was Chris making one waiver move the entire Ringer Fantasy Football League and then adding Shador Sanders and Shador Sanders was the number one quarterback that week and then Chris won or Chris got He made the finals. He made the finals.

54:07Bill Simmons:I will not have anyone from the Giants or Jets in any league I'm in. Yeah. My shameless homer pick. Cam Scadaboo for the Giants. That's what you have?

54:18Danny Heifetz:I love Scadaboo, man. I just love Scadaboo.

54:20Bill Simmons:So, Heifetz is a Giants fan. DK, Seattle. Craig, Pittsburgh. Pats, obviously. So, you have Scadaboo. Who do you have? I mean, does JSN count for this? Yeah. Yeah, it's JSN. I think even I logically have been talking about this. it's probable that he will regress this year based on what he did last year. I mean, like a 35 % target rate last year and 1 ,700 yards, 10 touchdowns. It's going to be hard for him to match that, but I'm starting to talk myself into the idea that he's not going to fall off that much. Like, maybe a little. Wouldn't the shameless Homer pick be you think he's the number one receiver?

54:53Bill Simmons:He could be. You can't have him be the... Offensive player of the year again. I mean, I think he is one of the top three receivers in the NFL. People are kind of down on him because they lost Kubiak, and it's like, eh, is he going to do the same? The Pats fucking shut him down on the Super Bowl. I don't know if you guys saw. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I remember from the game. That's the big takeaway from that game. Yeah, shut him down. Is that in his head? Yeah. Who do you have? Drew Aller? Absolutely. If I can pick him, I'll take it. You can pick whoever you want. I mean, Drew Aller's not a fantasy pick, but I would say that any Steelers player I would pick would be half-hearted.

55:28I don't know. Maybe Michael Pittman would be underrated, but I honestly, there's not a lot. that I could pick on this.

55:34Danny Heifetz:He has no home. Well, what about Jalen Warren being the new Kenny Gainwell? I think that has to be it. It's like every play is going to be for Metcalf or Pittman and then they're not open. It's a check down or a throwaway. The real guy I think could be underrated is Pat Friermuth who used to be a pretty good fantasy player and is still young and I think is really good and Johnnie Smith is now gone and I kind of think there's a chance that Friermuth could kind of pop back into being a top 12 tight end. So maybe I would say him.

55:55Bill Simmons:Can you guys do 40 seconds on your whole tight end theory this year? I've heard it on your podcast, but just for my audience. That there's only a handful that you want and the rest of them will just score eight points no matter where you get them. Just take them in the last round like a kicker. There's no point in taking like... It's like I'll take Fryer in the last round. Why not? If you're not getting Bowers or McBride, literally the odds are that the rest of them will just score eight points.

56:18Danny Heifetz:Basically the gap between like the number nine tight end and the number 17 tight end is like a pointer game, not even, and that's assuming you're playing them in their best weeks anyway. And so I think getting like, I mean, DK's favorite sleeper this year, at least my favorite sleeper of yours, is Juwan Johnson on the Saints. Yeah. Who now that Jordan Tyson, the rookie, is out a couple months, Juwan Johnson's probably going to be second on the Saints in every category and is borderline undrafted. And you get him in the 14th round and like you don't have to reach. He's not so good. You had like 800 yards last year.

56:43Bill Simmons:Like watching a basketball player play football. Yeah. My shameless homer pick is Drake May, who's been disparaged by Sal all year. I think Drake May is going to be number one in fantasy points this year. Okay. Yeah. He was, by the way, third last year. Yeah. But I think he is not only the number one quarterback, but I think he will get the most points. All the stuff that happened last year where he basically had nobody to throw to and his weapons are better. The schedule's more competitive. There were some blowout games last year where he was just out in the fourth quarter. They're actually going to need him.

57:17More shootout potential, yeah.

57:18Bill Simmons:31 touchdowns last year. He's going to have to run the ball in more games this year. I think they were little baby kid gloves with him last year with the running because they didn't want to get hurt. I could see around the goal line, maybe doing it more, but I just think he's going to have a better season.

57:31Danny Heifetz:What I hate about you saying that is that there's a world where if A.J. Brown falls to the third round in a fantasy draft, if you can start running back, running back, A.J. Brown, and then Drake May, and then A.J. Brown has the season, you think? Like, that actually would be probably a pretty incredible season.

57:43Bill Simmons:That was the last time I won my fantasy league with Sal was having the 07 Pats, like trying to build around them and a couple other things, but yeah. Okay. I think Dobbs is going to be good, too. Yeah, he's underrated. He's another concussion guy. He's got the big helmet. He's got the big helmet now. But I just think that Packers team was weird. They had these five receivers and two tight ends, and it didn't seem like there was any rhyme or reason to who got the ball. I think Dobbs is super reliable, like a great third down security blanket. They love him. Yeah. All right, your Veal Chop guy, Danny.

58:17Bill Simmons:Veal Chop, we did this concept a couple years ago. The Veal Chop hit or miss at a restaurant. It was on the menu last night when we got dinner. We did not order it, but we thought about it. Chang, this is the most infuriating take I have for Chang. He thinks the veal chop's amazing. It's the bad take. This is wrong. This is a fundamentally flawed exercise. Fuck you, Chang, would be my response. You're not the food czar I am on this podcast. We argued about it on Friday, though, because he's going to be in the draft. He's in the draft, yeah. Yeah, Dave's in the draft. Live ringer fantasy draft on Friday, so we can argue about veal chop.

58:52Bill Simmons:You're a veal chop guy, I see you, Dan.

58:53Danny Heifetz:I bet we all have the same guy. Well, we're going to run a Netflix poll because whether people understand what Veal Chop Guy means. My understanding of what this means is when it's done really well, it's elite. But also, if it doesn't go well, you feel dumb for getting it and also expensive.

59:08Bill Simmons:It's the riskiest, most expensive order. And it might be an absolute, like, you can't believe how good it is. It's like, you got to try this. Or it could be like, oh, fuck. I've never had one. I've never had Veal Chop. Neither? Is it that different from a steak? What is different about it? It can be too rare. It can be too fatty. But when it's so good, how is it different than a good steak? It's just there's something different about it. I can't explain it. It's the youth of the meat. Chang is now driving into traffic in downtown LA. He's trying to run over people.

59:41Danny Heifetz:He's putting his seatbelt back on. Who's your real chop guy? It's O'Mearon Hampton for the Chargers. It has to be him. On one hand, the Chargers offense, Mike McDaniel made Tua look good. Now he's got Justin Herbert. So he's going from like the most physically limited quarterback to the most physically, one of the most physically talented in Herbert. And the whole offense could just be supercharged. And Mike McDaniel compared O'Meara and Hampton to Terrell Davis, who ran for 2000 yards. So that's the upside. And the downside is you have a second year running back who already had an ankle injury last year in a three, three man backfield on an offensive line that will probably just everyone get hurt again.

1:00:12Danny Heifetz:And you're going to take them in the second round over like Derrick Henry and Chase Brown and Ken Walker and AJ Brown. I have the same guy. To me, Hampton is the only guy that is going in the top 20 in a draft that you don't officially know is good. Exactly. Every other guy, you're like, I know this player is awesome. I think Hampton's good. Yeah. I think he's good, but you don't know. Also, the interior Chargers line already kind of looks bad. I hate them losing Tyler Badish right off the jump at center, and they have Jake Slaughter coming in, but it's still a rookie center in the league where you don't want a rookie sledge center.

1:00:40Danny Heifetz:It's a fucking center. Come on. You lose your left and right tackle. But the center does the protections when all these defensive lines come up.

1:00:51Bill Simmons:We've seen teams win Super Bowls after their center got hurt. I'm not as scared about that. I think people are like, oh, here go the Chargers again. It's like, I don't know. Where are you at with Hampton? You know, it's interesting. As you guys know, I watch football for 11 hours on a Sunday over and over again. He never really jumped out of the TV for me. Even Juddkins, I was like, oh my God. Hampton was good. But like, was he better than RJ Harvey? Like, I just never saw him. Now, his offensive line was so bad, maybe we never saw it. But he never jumped out of the TV to me.

1:01:24Danny Heifetz:I think he's a, O'Marrion Hampton is a fake analytics guy, where I think that for the most part, I'm not like anti-analytics or anything, but I think that like the advanced stats, which usually are right, he's really great in yards after contact per attempt. But almost all of that, and people love to cut the sample size down. This is why advanced math is hard in football, because the sample sizes are small. They cut it to the first six games when the line is healthy. and then within that he did great but all the carries are just against the Giants in week four and the Giants are the worst run defense in the NFL for the first half of the season so it's like all these advanced things pointing out of Mary Hampton are based on one game with a defense that like was switching systems basically and was like doing terribly and yeah it's like the

1:02:01Bill Simmons:Pat's schedule stuff not to defend last year it's Pat's run but we had the easiest schedule like in a long time but then if you actually go game by game we caught some teams kind of before they sucked like we played Miami when they had all their guys, you know, and people thought Miami was going to be like a 9-10. So what are you saying?

1:02:18Danny Heifetz:It was hard? It was a hard schedule?

1:02:20Bill Simmons:I just don't think it was the easiest schedule of all time because I think how some of the teams performed in the second half skewed it a little bit. It was definitely a fucking cream puff schedule. Don't get me wrong, but I have a different guy for this. Okay. Same. Tootin'. Oh, I like that. That makes sense. Super fair. Travis Etienne last year was... in my league, which is the normal fantasy league, he was 10th for points. Tootin's getting the points. I don't, maybe they won't use him out of the backfield like they did with Travis, but I just think the other running back is Chris Rodriguez, who I just don't think is very good.

1:03:04Bill Simmons:I just think Tootin, I liked him. I liked when he was in last year in that offense and Liam Cohen. I don't know where we had, where do we have him? He's like a top 60 player. He's a good example, though, because kind of like Hampton, I don't know if I know he's good yet. You know, Tootin? And it's like you want to bet on Liam Cohen. Liam Cohen had Bucky Irving in Tampa and made Bucky Irving great his rookie season. And now you have Tootin. But this is a key point. We have him 27. Yeah. To me, those guys should be like this, right?

1:03:31Danny Heifetz:Who, O'Marrion Hampton? I think that's fair because I've been skeptical of Tootin because I'm torn. But the idea that you rather Tootin... Hampton was a first rounder. Yeah, Tootin in round five. Oh, yeah. In the real draft. Who was? Hampton. See, that's insane. The Chargers tried to trade out of the pick, though. They couldn't. I mean, he was a highly thought of prospect. And he's big. I don't know. And Tootin's small. Chris Rodriguez is like the boring, reliable, like you need three yards guy. Cohen coached him at Kentucky, so he has a connection to him. And I think he likes how consistent he is.

1:04:01And Tootin's more like the home run guy. He's the Charbonnet. So I think the fear is that it's a little bit more of a split backfield than you want.

1:04:07Bill Simmons:You know who I like? The running back on a team that scores 30 points a game. This was Javante Williams last year, right? Who nobody took. But I think if you have the running backs, that could be 10 to 12 touchdowns. He's going to get inside the five carries. So, I don't know. I just, I think he's going to go low, but I think he might be worth it as like a top 10 guy. I would rather take three swings at guys in that range than pay$65 for Jameer Gibbs.

1:04:32Danny Heifetz:I do think Chris Rodriguez is worth drafting, though, Sully, because he's a good example of a player that will probably go like in the 12th round of a draft. You have to get both, right?

1:04:39Bill Simmons:If you take Tootin, you also have to take Chris Rodriguez.

1:04:41Danny Heifetz:It's worth it with him because Rodriguez, no one's heard of him. Like even people who play fantasy football every year might not know who Chris Rodriguez is or have ever heard of him. And he also is the rare maybe starting running back that just is getting no bowels. Like, it is possible that he just leaves the Jaguars and carries in week one. And he's just not as exciting as Tootin. I just don't think he's very good. House was like, eh.

1:05:03Bill Simmons:All right. One of the most fun categories for us. The D &D list. Do not draft. I don't think we have to go into this in a ton of detail, but we can just go around the horn. Who do you have on the D &D? You start, Craig. Xavier Worthy. He's at equal risk to be hurt by his own teammates as he is the opposing team. Every game he goes down like a sack of doorknobs. I don't even think, the whole thing is how fast he is. I don't even think he looks that fast. This is your best take. It's your best take. I just don't, it always just feels like, fastest guy at the combine ever. Not that fast. I don't think he looks that fast.

1:05:36I kind of just feel like it's always a gimmick with Xavier Worthy.

1:05:39Bill Simmons:I like this. Danny will get this. You guys won't because you don't have kids, but when your kids have friends, there's always the one friend who gets hurt all the time. Yeah. it's like Bobby got hurt in the bouncy castle again we're in the playground Bobby fell at the jungle gym that might be Xavier Worthy who do you have? I have Jordan Addison for the Vikings I just don't want to live that life I think he's a good player and he has scored a lot of touchdowns in the league but I just think in this offense we don't know what to expect from Kyler we don't know what to expect from Justin Jefferson I think Jefferson is going to have the vast majority of the targets and it's going to leave Addison with a very low target rate and he's going to be very reliant on big plays and touchdowns.

1:06:19I think he's going to be a guy that's just on the waiver wire during the season. People are not going to want to have to deal with it.

1:06:26Bill Simmons:The flip to this is like what happened with Jameis and Williams last year who was like the Jordan Addison of the Detroit Lions and then all of a sudden was awesome last year. I think Jameau's way better though. Yeah. Who do you have, Danny?

1:06:37Danny Heifetz:I have Alec Pierce, receiver for the Colts. He does 1 ,000 yards a season and then he waited to get his surgery until after he got his free agent contract. So he delayed it by two months just to get paid. He's trying to return to practice this week. I'm like, I don't want a guy recovering from ankle surgery because he delayed it two months.

1:06:52Bill Simmons:Yeah, and in general, a little fluky. Oh, yeah. 47 catches. 47 catches, some bombs. Some things went right. Yeah, that's a good stay away. I have a Jackson Dart. I wouldn't take a few as free. I'm sorry.

1:07:07Danny Heifetz:How dare you? I just think he's going to get hurt.

1:07:10Bill Simmons:That means you wouldn't add him off waivers. not on my team don't have a spot for him the guy is a full-fledged maniac he just seems like he's determined to get hurt I've never seen anybody with less self-protection awareness I just don't want him because the worst part about him is his stats were good last year and he tantalizes you into thinking oh man I fucking nailed it with this Jackson Darpik and then he tries to take on a 275 pound defensive end and he's out of the game He's been in the blue tent. What was it? Scott Barrett. Every other game. It's like 47 % of the time he's played. He just cannot figure it out.

1:07:47You got to take him and then another quarterback, and then you just ride Jackson Dart until the car crashes. Honestly, you should have him and Jameis.

1:07:54Bill Simmons:You have him, and he gets hurt in the second quarter, and you lose the week because he got hurt. I'm just not going near him. I'm also not going near Jaden Daniels this year. The Tunsil injury, I'm out. Yeah. Thanks anyway. I didn't really love your offensive line or your schedule or anything to begin with. Also, Jaden Dano's got hurt a bunch of times last year. Especially at cost. I mean, he's very expensive. Yeah. I have a couple more. Okay. Can we go in more? Yeah, sure. You guys can do a second round if you want. I can do one. George Kittle? I had. He was on my list. Interesting. Like, why are we betting that the one, we're betting that the one guy who practices next to the substation who's coming off a torn Achilles, we're assuming that's the guy that's going to stay healthy?

1:08:34Yeah, that one.

1:08:34Bill Simmons:Also, tight end torn Achilles seems like a bad combo. In his 30s? He's always been really reliant on run after the catch, explosive miss, breaking tackles. Right, in January. He didn't get, didn't he like wait a while to get surgery too? He's the, I think the number one guy this year that people don't remember that he got injured pretty recently. Yeah, it's because he came back.

1:08:54Danny Heifetz:I'm usually the most skeptical of injuries on this show, but I believe in Kittle's recovery. I just, I'm not as worried about it.

1:08:59Bill Simmons:The problem with Kittle is that we've all had him at this point. And he'll have these weeks, like week six Arizona, where he's like 10 catches for 140 yards and three TDs and just destroys everybody. You're like, I love George Kittle. But yeah, not reliable. Any other D &Ds for you? I'm going with Brian Thomas Jr. Just ruined my, he ruined my league last year. I was like, I can't do this again. I mean, he might be a good player, but I don't want to go down that road again. He was supposed to be so good last year. And then he completely, I mean, he was hurt, which, you know, you have to take into account.

1:09:32But I think he also lost his confidence. He was dropping everything. just completely unreliable. And I think Parker Washington is the truth.

1:09:38Bill Simmons:It was devastating. It was devastating to watch in real time. I was able to rally with Parker Washington, but watching, and then the social clips from it, it just sucked to have him on a team. That's a good one. What do you got, Danny? Any second one?

1:09:52Danny Heifetz:You're talking about people I just hate and just emotional. It's Kyle Pitts. I just kind of don't want Kyle Pitts. DK is wiser than me and always talks about, you've got to cut out toxic people from your life. And Kyle Pitts and I have a toxic relationship and I don't want him in my life. anymore. Fair. Like the George Clooney movie where you're taking things out of your backpack? Yeah. Just don't have him in your backpack.

1:10:12Bill Simmons:Daniel Jones is obviously on here coming off the Achilles. I just don't trust anybody coming off an Achilles injury who plays football like eight, nine months later. The big one for me, a little controversial. Now, I would take him if he was free, but I wouldn't actually pay for him. I'm just out on DJ Moore. Oh. Yeah, I'm out. That's another one where the Bears fans are like, good luck yeah well he's a little bit of A.J. Brown to him I was gonna say are you gonna try or are you not

1:10:39Danny Heifetz:I think that exact feeling is why D.J. Moore is a great value this year because you know who loves D.J. Moore Joe Brady the head coach of the Buffalo Bills who have given him a prepotent they were together in Carolina I don't know I think D.J. Moore is gonna enjoy being a star in Buffalo

1:10:54Bill Simmons:I thought he had a shit year last year for what the expectations were with the great coach and I think a good quarterback why was he unhappy is he just unhappy unhappy? This is the A.J. Brown. What was wrong with him? A.J. Brown, I understand why he was unhappy. It was like, if I was A.J. Brown, I also would have been unhappy. Why was D.J. Moore unhappy? Because balls were sailing 12 feet over his head too often, I guess. I think Caleb was missing him a lot. You know, there's a lot going on in Chicago, a lot of mouths to feed. I don't think he likes Caleb either. I think they just don't like each other.

1:11:22Who else is Josh Allen throwing to? D.J. Moore's talented. Their receivers are brutal.

1:11:25Danny Heifetz:I had D.J. Moore stepping on another category, but look, somebody's got to get points. Yeah. All right.

1:11:31Bill Simmons:This next segment is brought to you by PNC Bank Fantasy Football, all about strategy and planning. That's what these guys do in the Ringer Fantasy Football Show. If you want to win your league, you have to be willing to do the boring research or just find some experts you can trust, like us, to do that boring winning research for you. Same thing applies to your finances, guys. You're better off leaving it to the financial experts at PNC Bank. We're going to do smart and steady draft strategy. Each one of us is going to do one player that we think is the smart and calculated lock. 12 to 15 points a week.

1:12:05Bill Simmons:Not flashy. Just somebody you can just throw in the lineup. Trust not think about. Who do you have?

1:12:10Danny Heifetz:Bo Nix, the quarterback for the Broncos. Bo Nix, he had the most pass attempts in the entire NFL last season. You can get him. He's affordable. Every week, he's going to be good.

1:12:18Bill Simmons:Does his ankle work?

1:12:20Danny Heifetz:I think he's going to rush for even more yards this year. Great.

1:12:23Bill Simmons:His ankle works. Who do you have, DK? Okay. I'm going with Chase Brown for the Bengals. Tough, durable, reliable. He's in there. He plays a ton of snaps, which is really important in fantasy, obviously. And he's in a good offense. And I think that's going to be a big part of it. He's going to score touchdowns. He's going to catch passes. He's going to get a lot of touches. Can I go with Brock Purdy? Yeah, you sure can. Speaking of finances, he kind of looks like he should be your accountant, but quietly like a top 10 guy every single year. Very dependable. Also can run a little bit. I'm going with Trevor Lawrence.

1:12:54Bill Simmons:who that offense scored 32 points a game down the stretch. His weapons are better than ever. And I don't think people think he's a top five quarterback, but he was last year from points wise. And you could probably get him for pretty cheap. And it's not that exciting of a pick because it's not like he's a sleeper anymore. But that's what makes it a fun pick. Anyway, that's the smart and steady draft strategy. This expert fantasy football draft segment was brought to you by the financial experts over at PNC Bank. Brilliantly boring since 1865.

1:13:30Danny Heifetz:For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters. Tremphaya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremphaya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject Tremphaya, proper training is required. Tremphaya is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur.

1:14:10Danny Heifetz:Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tremphaya today. Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more or visit TremphayaRadio.com. For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters. Tremphaya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremphaya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject Tremphaya, proper training is required.

1:14:55Danny Heifetz:Tremphaya is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tremphaya today. Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more or visit TremphayaRadio.com.

1:15:29Bill Simmons:This episode is brought to you by PayPal. All right, parents, PayPal's on your team this back to school. I've been there myself. You're paying for sports gear, backpacks, sneakers, laptops. You've likely got multiple carts, your favorite online stores. Well, that's when PayPal comes in with the assist. Pay in four, no interest, no fees, truly game-changing, subject to approval. Learn more at paypal.com slash pay in four. PayPal Inc. NMLS 910457. Our Aaron Brooks, please don't ever watch him. Just check the box score Sunday night to see his points guy. This has to be Malik Willis, right? That's who I have.

1:16:09Bill Simmons:I don't want to watch one minute of him. just give me your 23 points and we'll shake hands at the end of the year but he's clearly going to be like a top 12 to 15 QB yeah he's the fantasy loophole you know it's the rushing thing it's rushing yards are worth more for quarterbacks than running backs and the rushing yards or rushing touchdowns are worth more than passing touchdowns for quarterbacks last year I saw this in the four starts he made he had over the last two years he has a 17 % scramble rate last year the NFL leader was Drake May at 10%. And he was running for his life on 90 % of those scrimmages.

1:16:46And I think that just means in addition to that, he's going to have a lot of design runs. He's just going to be running a lot and that is a cheat code in fantasy. He averaged in those four games as a starter 10 rushing fantasy points per game. Josh Allen last year averaged 8 for reference. So he is, I mean, obviously he's not going to have the upside as a passer as Josh Allen, but like he's going to be running all over the place. That gives him a really good floor. If he throws a touchdown or two in a game, that's a bonus. I think he has a chance to be a top 12 quarterback.

1:17:12Bill Simmons:How many quarterbacks do you think had 100-plus rushing attempts last year? 100-plus. 17-game season. Six a game. Like four? Not many. Yeah, four or five. Three. Yeah. And the leader was Allen at 112. Hertz was 105. And a lot of those were the fourth and ones. And then Drake May, 103. Probably 90 of them running for his life with three guys behind him. Willis might have like 150 rushes this year.

1:17:39Danny Heifetz:Especially the garbage time. it's going to be like so much like Miami's going to be losing away a lot and then Willis and A. Chan are just going to be like just absolutely dinking and dunking down their way down the field as they're playing pre-vent defense. We always do this though. It's like remember the Justin Fields year? It's like well Justin Fields he could run a lot and he'll be a fantasy loophole and then it's like the team will be horrible. He sucked them. He like it quite literally couldn't pass. Is Malik Willis good? Do we know that? No but it's the whole point of like the point of those Malik Willis is not a top 100 player.

1:18:05Danny Heifetz:I think the difference is Malik Willis is legitimately like a 13th round pick. Sure. And the point being that what's the point of that is like I want someone not who's going to sit on my bench all year and be like a like a slightly below average. You want someone who will either be really helpful or I can cut. And Malik Willis to me is like the perfect example. You got to take a second quarterback with him. Yeah. Well, I would go further.

1:18:23Bill Simmons:I think there's enough good quarterbacks this year where you could argue you just take like four or one dollar guys. That's your move. This is the year it might actually work. You're going to see it again at the Ringer Fantasy Draft. Just do weight. Yeah. No, there's 20 guys I'd be fine starting. Yeah. Right?

1:18:38Danny Heifetz:Yeah.

1:18:39Bill Simmons:You'd go all the way down to Tyler Shuck and it's like, eh.

1:18:41Danny Heifetz:You're just going to get like Mahomes and Stafford and Malik Willis and Baker and you're just going to figure out who to start every week.

1:18:47Bill Simmons:My, that 2025 booty call isn't happening again, guy. For the guy last year in fantasy who in November and December good things started happening but maybe that's where it ends. I had Travis Etienne for this because I don't think good things are going to happen in the same way in new orleans i don't i that was the only year last year that he actually put a whole season together i don't trust it they paid him a lot of money i just don't trust it so that would be mine what do you have um i have travion henderson who it's fair i had a lovely time with last year i had a great night 140 night with him it was wonderful he what are the west palestine ohio yeah east palace east palestine sorry east you He took him to trailer parks?

1:19:35Yeah, it was great. You know, we got down and dirty. Because Travion Henderson was just like, randomly would just have a 50-yard touchdown every game. And to be honest... He had one game where he had two. Yeah, and like, the way you say that a Marion Hampton didn't jump off the screen to you, I kind of feel that way about Travion.

1:19:51Bill Simmons:Listen, you're preaching the choir with Pats fans. I think he's no good vision. Yeah, but he goes down with the first guy who hits him is the problem. And I was having a blast with these 50-yard touchdowns. Kind of don't think that's going to hold up. Ramondre's still there, and I think it's probably going to be the starter. So I'm kind of like, I think I'm okay. I think it was a great time last year. I'm going to let it be. I think that's fair. I didn't watch every play of the Pats last year. I didn't really feel like he could be a reliable, give him the ball over and over again, move the chains guy.

1:20:16Danny Heifetz:Ramondre did everything he could have done if he was going to lose the job. He kept fumbling. And they still get, Ramondre is literally one of the five or six best blocking running backs probably in the NFL and Henderson's maybe in the running for the worst blocking back. And also, coaches hate when you have a run design that they don't hit. and Trevion Henderson doesn't always just set up the blocks to hit the home run. Like he's striking out a lot.

1:20:36Bill Simmons:So you have anybody else for this or those two good ones? I had a repeat in Pierce, Alec Pierce. Yeah. That's a great one. I think it was just two high variants.

1:20:43Danny Heifetz:I just had Tucker Craft. It was the first half of the season but he had six touchdowns in eight games and it's hard but I'm like if he had any tore his ACL and then he kept playing He's the same deal. He had like a couple of huge runs. So you're good on Kittle 31 years old torn Achilles Tucker Craft 23 and his ACL's recovering great. You don't like that. Well, there's like a 40-spot gap. If people don't like the little questionable list of Kittle, it could be like five-round difference. I'm like, I'd rather have George Kittle after the top 100. I don't want to take Tucker Kraft over like DJ Moore.

1:21:08Danny Heifetz:I had him in two of my three leagues.

1:21:12Bill Simmons:It was honestly devastating when he got hurt. He was so good. He looked like Gronk. He really did look like baby Gronk. I believe in Tucker Kraft. Yeah, I'm not out on him either. My look, somebody's got to get points on that team, right, guy? I know this one. Who do you have? Wanda Robinson for the Titans. Just a PPR cheat code. That was your guy's best take last year. That Wanda Robinson was Travis Hunter with PR. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever that was. No, he was expensive. You were on that in August. And he had like a thousand yards. They just used Travis Hunter for like screens and stuff. It was terrible.

1:21:51I think Wanda is, look, he had the 11th highest target rate in the NFL last year. 11th. 27 % target rate. That's an elite number. And I don't think that's going to change this year. I think he's going to be a huge part of this offense. Dayball brought him over and paid him a whole bunch of money. Talk about the Zay Flowers contract, like the Wondell Robinson contract. It's kind of crazy.

1:22:15Bill Simmons:But Dayball seemed like he was all in on him, which I think is probably a good sign for Wondell Robinson.

1:22:19Danny Heifetz:Wondell's like a hard worker, big Kobe Bryant guy, like the kind of stuff coaches love. And Tate's going higher than him? Yes, quite a bit higher. See, I don't agree with that. I mean, Tate has, in two preseason games, five targets and zero catches. Like, they're not on the same page whatsoever.

1:22:34Bill Simmons:And usually the rookie receivers don't put together a whole season. Even Egbuka last year was good for half the season. It fell apart. I think Wandale is going to be an extension of the run game. Lots of screens, lots of design plays. You know, just get him to football, let him do his thing. Get five yards a pop or whatever and just be good with it. I like it. Plus, he's going to be in some blowouts, catching some dumb touchdowns at the end of games. Who do you have?

1:22:59Danny Heifetz:Maybe I'm cheating, but I have DJ Moore. Maybe the Bills are too good, but I'm like, the Bills are a top five team, and the only pass catchers who have been drafted are DJ Moore and Dalton Kincaid, and I just think DJ Moore is the epitome of like, he's going to get everything.

1:23:11Bill Simmons:They're 2-3-4 Shakir.

1:23:14Danny Heifetz:They have Khalil Shakir.

1:23:14Bill Simmons:Is your guy Palmer still on that team? He's still alive.

1:23:18Danny Heifetz:He was just hurt a lot of last year, yeah. Yeah. And then they still have Keon Coleman, the first rounder. Who just got hurt, though, but yeah. Who they can't stand and undermine. Yeah, they're just Palmer. That's the thing. So it's like, and again. It's pretty rough. If Skyler Bell, Michael Hart, yeah. Tyrell Shavers got hurt.

1:23:31Bill Simmons:Danny, 9-8. Oh. The Bills?

1:23:34Danny Heifetz:The Bills are going 9-8.

1:23:35Bill Simmons:Just throwing it out there. Why do we think the Bills are good? Bills third place in the division? Maybe. Why are the Bills good? Reason one, Josh Allen. What's your second reason? Offensive line, run game. James Cook led the NFL in rushing last year. Cool, you're going to score points. What else have you got? Well, that's pretty good, right? The best quarterback in the league, and they can run the ball? Defense is okay. Yeah, it's like average. How's your schedule? Not great. I don't know. I feel like we're better than them.

1:24:00Danny Heifetz:You got a superhero at quarterback. I think we're better than them. Like, because of coaching or because of the roster? I think we have a better team. I think we have more good players.

1:24:10Bill Simmons:That might be true, but you don't have Josh Allen. I can think what I want to think.

1:24:15Danny Heifetz:I think we have better players. Because you have your quarterback rankings and Drake Mays at the top.

1:24:19Bill Simmons:Josh Allen, I think, is the best regular season quarterback in the league.

1:24:22Danny Heifetz:Yeah.

1:24:23Bill Simmons:And it's very far-fetched to ever think of him not going 10 and 7. Would you rather have So you're emphasizing Regular season You bet I am Oh my god Would you have Drake Right now Would you rather Drake May or Josh Allen In a playoff game Is Drake May Going to be healthy For the playoff game Yes they're healthy Drake May wasn't healthy Last year They're both healthy Jesus Christ

1:24:42Danny Heifetz:The Broncos quarterbacks Were in either You're giving Drake May A championship game win

1:24:49Bill Simmons:You're forcing him I'd probably rather Josh Allen He's like How can I How can I play this This is going to be on Twitter. I'd rather have Josh Allen. You checkmated me. My Somebody's Got to Get Points guy is Jalen Coker. Oh, I like that. I'm a huge fan. He got hurt last year. He's a Holy Cross guy, so I was always monitoring him. And was going to be a real valuable guy for them. Got hurt, missed most of the season. Came back in time and was important for them in the playoffs. They went big on him. They gave him a new contract. and I think that team, the two receivers, that's really all they have.

1:25:27Bill Simmons:They don't even have a third receiver. It's going to be those two and running back by committee, but I think Coker is going to be a 1 ,000-yard guy. That's my most random dumb prediction of the pod. He's another guy that fantasy analysts really like as a player. He's another one who just makes big catches, especially like they had a lot of dumb fourth-quarter games last year. You saw down the stretch. It was like third and 11, and somehow he would get open and make a play. So I'm a fan. Did you have one for this? I was going to go. I think if I had to pick any Brown, I would take Harold Fannin, who I think...

1:26:01Bill Simmons:I do like him. He set the catch record for a Browns rookie last year. They have good skill guys. Really good. Incredible skill. The easiest throw for these quarterbacks is probably just going to be to Harold Fannin. And Munkin has always done good with tight ends. Especially if Shadur is the starter. Yeah, I'm like, they're just going to throw screens to Harold Fannin. I think I would pick him if I had to take any Browns. See, the reason they have to start Shadur, at least by week three, I didn't think looked good at all last year the crowd's gonna be so into it you're just completely flipping the energy in the stadium and they're gonna be it's gonna be like watching a bunch of parents rooting for their kids in a youth hockey game or something everyone's just gonna want it so badly Skip is gonna lose his mind did you see Skip yesterday on Twitter only cause you reposted it yeah did you watch all 19 minutes I didn't watch one minute of it it was good it was a little long but you know Craig, somebody pointed out that there was another 17-minute Skip diatribe from a year ago.

1:26:57About Shadar? Same exact thing. I just like the way that Skip is approaching media in 2026. It's an interesting strategy, what he's doing. Okay. 20-minute uninterrupted direct camera. What people want to see is a 20-minute video on Twitter. It's what people want.

1:27:15Bill Simmons:Brings his wife in sometimes, right? They're talking politics. Yeah, there's a lot going on there at the Bayless household. my sorry that's a little too rich for my blood guy for me it's McCaffrey he's just once it gets over 30 bucks yeah out good luck everybody it's so hard I thought last year he defied expectations that the advanced stats weren't even that kind to him no but he caught 100 balls he was the number one player in fantasy and if you've drafted him you won your league probably it's like having two players in one starting position on your roster if he's healthy if he's healthy McCaffrey has

1:27:50Danny Heifetz:literally in the last seven years been maybe the most important player to have on your team in four of the years and the single most important player to not have a new team he's literally the

1:27:59Bill Simmons:ricky bobby first or last he really should be the veal chop i guess yeah he's the definition of it yeah all-time fantasy veal chop because like when tomlinson had his run in the 2000s he was just good every year there was no you just could pencil him in for the numbers mcafree you have no idea yeah um but two people would bid on him and it'll become an ebay auction and somebody will spend $58 in him. And every week that he plays, he'll probably be the best player in fantasy.

1:28:22Danny Heifetz:It is like if Tomlinson just missed three of the years in the 2000s. He played like two games those seasons. Danny, who do you have? Chris Olave for the Saints. I think it's just one of those guys where the price has gotten so high now that I'm just like, I'll let someone Craig said it, I think, perfectly. I'll let someone else take him. It's like he's one you know, this is morbid, but one head hit away from missing the rest of the season. You know what I mean? It's like Tua kind of a couple years ago where it's just like, I don't want to see that. It just worries me the odds that he could miss the entire season.

1:28:57Danny Heifetz:You're a parent. This is why the football didn't score top five in the youth sport rankings.

1:29:02Bill Simmons:By the way, the CTA story this week wasn't great either. That was a huge downer. Yeah, that was a... I thought volleyball was a great call. Yeah? Yeah. Craig's a volleyball guy. I played in high school. I just think it's a great sport. It is. Craig got recruited. He's a great sport to cover as a high school reporter. Oh, yeah. Just like really easy to keep track. Sets. Kept your attention. Good parents. It's a great co-ed sport, too. If you have like a son and a daughter, they can kind of play together. Yeah. It's just like an easy family sport. You can play after in your 20s. Beach volleyball.

1:29:27Bill Simmons:Beach volleyball is great. Yeah. Did you have a...

1:29:30Danny Heifetz:Oh, the Too Rich for My Blood? Yeah. Did you have one? For me, all offseason, it's been Drake London for the Falcons. Nothing to do with Drake London. Everything to do with having watched Tua have to get my receiver the ball and I don't want to watch it. If Penix plays... The idea that Tua might lose this quarterback competition without Pettix playing is funny to me. I love it.

1:29:50Bill Simmons:They're like, you've lost the competition. Who did I lose to? It doesn't matter. The guy in the brace over there. You've just lost. He's in the blue tent. All right, let's do... We're doing bad on pace. We're going to speed round. Give me a$1 QB guy, Craig. Tyler Shuck. Hey, you stole mine. Yeah, that's Shuck. Daniel Jones or Jacoby Brissett? I had Shuck and I have CJ, a.k.a. C-plus Stroud. Yeah, he's another one. C plus drought I think could for a dollar probably have some big games now with booty is Mendoza in the running for this he's not gonna play he's not gonna play until I think he's probably sure he's not gonna play no not sure they said this about Drake May and he was out there in week four

1:30:28Danny Heifetz:the difference is Tom Brady is you have to have an owner who has is Tom Brady to do it I think it's the only situation you'll ever have where you actually could have the number one pick not play because Tom Brady's been making great

1:30:37Bill Simmons:decisions this year do you see his GQ I mean that's your guy we're very happy with all the Super Bowls we went with Tom and we wish him the best in his next endeavors is that what you say with Belichick too I love Belichick I'm like the last Belichick defender this is is he a Hall of Famer it's a witch hunt right now is he a Hall of Famer is Belichick a Hall of Famer we have a good UNC year coming what do you think my attention is on UCLA okay that's all I care about we're on to UCLA do you have a comment on Adam Vinatieri making the Hall of Fame before Bill Belichick I had a comment on him coming in as a Colt.

1:31:14Bill Simmons:This was very upsetting to the Pats fan base. And my challenge with this, as always, is can anyone name one kick he made with the Colts? Can you name one Colts kick from Adam Minnitari? Just one. You can't. Can you do a Super Bowl? You cover football for the ringer since we've had the ringer. I'm notorious for not caring about kickers. But they won. Was it because of an Adam Minnitari kick? You're just saying he was on a team that won a Super Bowl? I don't think that counts. Nobody can name a kick. I was going to do a thing on my podcast about this, and I didn't, but I watched an entire YouTube video of his biggest Colts kicks, and all of them were like, week 8, week 10, week 12.

1:31:58Bill Simmons:Anyway, it annoyed me. So he's like a Josh Allen type, only a regular season guy. Right. No, he's made all of the biggest kicks in the history of our franchise.

1:32:07Danny Heifetz:He signed with the Colts in 06, and they won the Super Bowl, and he finished his run with the... He had set the record for most field goals in a playoff run for the Colts. Great.

1:32:15Bill Simmons:Can you remember any of them? They're all in the first quarter, Ivis.

1:32:21Bill Simmons:My DeMar DeRozan anti-Lytics guy. We came up with this last year. I have Rico Dowdle. I like Rico. Just like him. Not that fun to take 13 for 78 with a touchdown every week and just grind it out. Good carries. Underrated guys. Yeah, I like him. he won the job right he's about to it's gonna be a split he'll get most of the cares I like Rico though analytics don't love him yeah but who do you have Mark Andrews I think everyone's kind of giving up on that old man he's a good zag guy yeah everyone's had him everybody's giving up kind of unreliable can't catch in critical moments but sneaky late late round dart throw more fun to take your own fan in I'm kind of like Isaiah Legley's gone yeah Mark Andrews might have 10 touchdowns I know he's probably gonna score double digit touchdowns this year Danny mine's Devon 8 Devon Echan for the Dolphins.

1:33:09Everyone's out on the Dolphins. They're going to have a horrific offense. They're going to lose every game. They're going to be behind. I just love Devon Echan.

1:33:17Bill Simmons:My question with the Dolphins, and I'm going to dive into this more with Sal on Thursday, but are they going to be kind of funky to play in a way that's actually good to have some of the Dolphins guys? Like, are they going to have this really weird... Because they're playing like Army? Yeah. You're playing them, and it's like you have to practice the whole week to prepare for their weird style.

1:33:36Danny Heifetz:Willis and A-Chan is like, instead of Thunder, Lightning is Lightning, Lightning backfield. And then the offensive line is huge.

1:33:43Bill Simmons:I think they're offensive lines and it's above average. I don't even think it's average. I think it's okay.

1:33:48Danny Heifetz:They have a lot of raw developmental guys, but it is just the people on that line are like Patrick Paul at left tackle and Proctor, I guess Proctor is going to start as a guard. Like they're just massive people. And again, I mean, I always felt like Derrick Henry, Lamar Jackson was like this unprecedented backfield, but A-Chan Willis is kind of too, like they're the fastest quarterback and the fastest running back in the league are playing together that's weird over under is really hard

1:34:08Bill Simmons:because they i don't know what their goal is for this year other than they're like actively yeah right but they're gonna have like two games where they just run for 270 yards on people and people are like oh my god the packers just gave up 270 yards rushing to the like whoever

1:34:25Danny Heifetz:um who do did you do one my analytics guy's just david montgomery he's a classic like dead zone running back like craig made a face about him earlier yeah he's 29 years old i just i love the I love the way he plays. I love David Montgomery as a real-life player. I like him as a person, but I feel like we let that influence, the fact that he's just going to be running for three yards and carry on the Texans. The Texans' run game has been horrific. It has been, but if it improves, which the bar is... And I love when we swap out linemen for other bad linemen. We're like, well, it could be better now, but it's also...

1:34:50Danny Heifetz:The Texans' defense is so good, there's just going to be so much carries in the second half.

1:34:53Bill Simmons:Also, they had Nick Chubb coming off losing his entire knee, basically, who just retired. That was their starting running back last year. I mean, And they had the worst running backs in the league. Woody Marks. Just didn't need a C-plus from him and a C-plus from CJ. Yeah. Just give us two C-pluses. We're good. I can't resist, even though I know I'll be afraid to look on Tuesday and see the red flag guy. This has been Mike Evans for seven years. I think we RIP that one. It's Mike Evans in this year. We should name it the Mike Evans. We should name it the Mike Evans Award. I have Laporta. Oh, that's a good one.

1:35:27Danny Heifetz:He's got a back injury right now.

1:35:28Bill Simmons:Laporta, red flag next to him basically for the last two years. even though we all love him. I don't trust him to stay healthy. He takes big hits. Always seems like it's a different body part. So I had him. What about Abuka? Amika Abuka. And he's already hurt this year. And he's got a turf toe thing, maybe, or a toe injury. And I'm just like, and he showed last year. He fell off a cliff last year. He would have been my favorite pick this year if he didn't have a toe injury. I think he's going to be great. We kind of saw this in college, too. He got banged up, and then his performance dropped pretty significantly.

1:35:58Like, he's one of those guys that maybe—

1:36:00Bill Simmons:Well, the big deal is his quarterback. is the exact same way. Where he starts out great and then by week 16 he's got eight injuries. Is there like an injury parlay team? Where it's like,

1:36:08Danny Heifetz:I need to hit all three. This is the offseason thing where like, whatever was hurt last year they'll get healthy. I'm like, no, everyone's rehabbing now and can just get re-injured. Which happens all the time.

1:36:16Bill Simmons:Dini, who can get to nine wins in the NFC South if you had to pick a team? Oh. Because Carolina's already I think I still would take the Bucs. I'd take the Bucs. I would take the Bucs. I feel like by default it's the Bucs, right?

1:36:28Danny Heifetz:I think their offensive line is the key. I like Kellen. The reason I'm out on the Bucs is that it's very obvious that this is the last year for Bulls and that usually goes poorly. He's quietly one of the older coaches in the league. He fired a lot of his staff. You had that day ball last year.

1:36:41Bill Simmons:Yes. Kept him a year late.

1:36:43Danny Heifetz:Yeah. That's why I don't like the Jets. Aaron Glenn's not coaching that quarterback they're taking next year. I'm like, the vibes disintegrate as soon as anything goes wrong.

1:36:54Bill Simmons:My 2022 Cooper Cup. it's a year after the year guy named after Cooper cup, having just the most insane single season and then never approaching it. Would you go Drake London or Michael Wilson for this one? Michael Wilson's a smart one. I think even though I like him. Yeah. What about Jonathan Taylor? That's who I wrote down. Do that as well.

1:37:15Danny Heifetz:I thought it had to be Jonathan Taylor or Jackson Smith. Jake, but I just thought it had to be.

1:37:19Bill Simmons:I'm just so tired of counting out Jonathan Taylor. And then he just looks like he's the best 45 degree angle running back in the history of the sport. He's amazing.

1:37:28Danny Heifetz:Our buddy Scott Barrett had this great point where it's Jonathan Taylor and Derek Henry are the two running backs that have the biggest delta between their fantasy points per game and wins versus losses because they don't catch a ton of passes. So they're really great running with good game scripts even against when the defense knows they're going to run. The difference is the Ravens are probably going to win eight or nine of the first 10 games because they don't play a playoff team in the first two months. The Colts, when they're winning all those games, Jonathan Taylor is incredible. Daniel Jones gets hurt when they're losing.

1:37:55Danny Heifetz:Jonathan Taylor is just not going to rack up the carries, 20, 30 carries game. So I don't believe in the Colts winning more than eight games this year. So Taylor's tough for me.

1:38:03Bill Simmons:I want no part of Drake London this year. None, zero, zilch. I don't want to go near him. And if anything, not only it's the combo of having a terrible QB, but then also having a terrible QB throwing you balls that could get you hurt. Right. Out. No, thank you.

1:38:19Danny Heifetz:Whatever, just every, you need to catch and it feels like a miracle, as Greg always says. Like, it's just the worst feeling in fantasy.

1:38:24Bill Simmons:And I still don't know what happened with Michael Wilson last year. I didn't understand it as it was happening.

1:38:27Danny Heifetz:He turned into the best receiver in the NFL. Unstoppable. Volume. He ran the most routes in the league over that stretch.

1:38:33Bill Simmons:It felt like they were always down 10 having to throw the ball. Out of principle, I will take Michael Wilson over Marvin Harrison Jr. I just like, what I saw last year, I'm like, Michael Wilson's better. He just is. Yeah. This episode is brought to you by PNC Bank. In today's sports, everyone is constantly trying to outdo each other. Trick formations, infield shifts, constant rotation changes, yet it's proven time and time again, that strong fundamentals are the thing that will lead you to victory. Banking, no different. While everyone else tries to outdo each other, PNC Bank just keeps going right down the middle with steady calculated money moves and the financial wins just keep coming.

1:39:09Bill Simmons:PNC Bank, brilliantly boring since 1865, brilliantly boring since 1865 as a registered mark of the PNC Financial Services Group Incorporated. PNC Bank, National Association member, FDIC. Hey, I was lucky enough to get a son and a daughter through their early teens and their mid-teens in the social media era. And even though we were constantly monitoring it, there's still a whole bunch of stuff that can go wrong. And that's why Instagram teen accounts have automatic protections on by default. Built-in content settings for the content teens can see, contact limits for who can contact them and time management tools like daily time limits, and sleep mode.

1:39:50Bill Simmons:Teens are automatically placed in the teen accounts. Teens under 16 will need a parent's permission to change any of these settings to be less strict. Instagram will continue adding built-in safety features to help create age-appropriate experiences. Learn more about teen accounts and Instagram's ongoing work to protect teens online at instagram.com slash teenaccounts. Who is your, I just want everyone on that offense. I don't care who team, correct? Detroit. Hmm. I got the Bears I'm shocked Bears interesting Loveland is a bit expensive but if he falls a bit in a league or whatever that you're in just people aren't dialed in the Bears are very pricey I think the Lions go deeper the Lions could lead the league in scoring they have the easiest

1:40:33Danny Heifetz:schedule in the league I want the Chargers I just think Mike McDaniel will it will be like oh right he made Tua look really good I think Mike McDaniel is going to be amazing for the Chargers I like Jacksonville for this

1:40:44Bill Simmons:I think Dallas is the case too oh yeah Dallas is the case running back and the two receivers. I'm just loading up and those are my guys. I'm going to go with my year too early fuck it guy. Honestly shocked by the price for this guy. Let me look at where he is on the ringer.

1:41:05Bill Simmons:He is. Oh, wow. Oh my God. 25th. I'm all in on price. I'm all in. I love the Seahawks I've already made the case I think it's just bizarre that they're not being treated like the favorites again and a team with a legitimate chance to go back to back I think they have the best coach in the league they might have the best receiver in the league they have one of the three best defenses in the league maybe second they're going to be able to run the ball we've seen that no matter who is running the ball for them he's usually going to be okay and and the only reason we don't talk about Price is because he wasn't most of the starter last year in college.

1:41:47Bill Simmons:And that always throws people off. But we've seen this happen over the years where the guy who didn't get all the reps in college all of a sudden is awesome as a pro. Charbonnet, I don't see at all. Not to mention he kind of sucked last year anyway, but then he got hurt. And people are like, oh, it's a timeshare. There will be no timeshare. They're going to play. The question is how many carries can you put on him? Not to mention the way they play. Like some running back is going to get points for them. He's 25th. I think he should be top 12, in my opinion. I had Price written down, too. It's kind of a zag because there's not a lot of hype on him right now.

1:42:23I think everybody kind of feels like he's going to be in a committee with Helani and then Charbonnet is going to come back at some point. But I'm like, what if Jadarian Price is just awesome? I mean, everything you've seen.

1:42:32Bill Simmons:Also, Helani? Like, come on. I mean, I think he'll be a good role player for them. But, like, it would not surprise me if Price is just 70%, 65 % of the rushes. Yeah, like 18 to 20 a game. And ripping off long runs. I think he could be more in the passing game than he would show in college. The one thing I will say, the tidbits that we've gotten from Hard Knocks is the teammates raving about Price, how he's looked in practice. As you know, this is one of my favorite things in August. When the teammate buzz about the guys, you have to get seriously.

1:43:05Danny Heifetz:People are like, yo, holy shit. I think it's a great, I love this point. so we do the take purge at the end of each it's like one of my favorite episodes I can't do it anymore but one of my one of my ones was going to be that Jadarion Price would just be straight up better in fantasy football than Jeremiah Love for this season and it's not as fun anymore because Jeremiah Love has a high ankle sprain so it doesn't really count but even healthy

1:43:27Bill Simmons:I think that might have been the case

1:43:28Danny Heifetz:well that's what I was going to say I think Jadarion Price will be better because he was just stuck behind Jeremiah Love at Notre Dame but Jadarion Price I mean he was one of the most explosive players like he was unbelievable he just had a couple fumbling issues He was at Notre Dame and he got benched a couple times. But I think he's incredible.

1:43:43Bill Simmons:Who do you have for this? It's really stupid to usually bet on a rookie playing with Kyle Shanahan. But Dijon Stribling, I'm like, the preseason stuff, I'm believing it. I think he's going to be really good. And I think it's going to be like Mike Evans and Dijon Stribling. Evans, by the way, has a groin injury right now. Kittle's hurt. I'm like, Stribling looks legit. Evans has a bunk bed in the electromagnetic complex with McCaffrey. He's like in the back of the tank. Just getting killed. You don't like shriveling. I saw you make a face. I don't. He feels like an August type guy to me. Really?

1:44:17Bill Simmons:People are pretty split on him in the draft. You were. I mean, I liked him, but it felt really early. Everybody thought it was a reach. Yeah. The second he got on the field, I was like, this man looks like a professional athlete. This guy looks like an NFL receiver. You know what? I think human nature does support your position on this because there's a part of me that thinks Shanahan's going to be like, fuck all these people that said we picked him too early. I'm going to feed him 150 targets this year. So ironically, him, Unfando, him, and Price have seemed, oh no, Price is lower. Price is plus 650 for Offensive Rookie of the Year.

1:44:50Bill Simmons:Stribbling was plus 850. Boston has dropped to 22 to 1. It was 45 to 1 when I was able to do the bet. But I think Price is the best out of all the favorites. And Stribbling would be the other one. who's I just don't trust him he's looked pretty legit though yeah everyone's hurting it's like Mike Evans is he gonna be healthy George Kittle is he gonna be healthy yeah Striblings looked great

1:45:15Danny Heifetz:I had Stripling for this category too you know what's sad

1:45:18Bill Simmons:this almost could have been a category with is Debo coming back what would that category be named

1:45:23Danny Heifetz:well sad reunion year because it's Rogers and McCarthy it's Debo it's Geno back to the Jets it's just like this all these sad is it J-Lo and Ben getting back together yeah it's like a second marriage it's bad reunion why are we doing this

1:45:35Bill Simmons:officially divorced. We already know how this is going to play out. It's bad reboots. Bad reboots. Yeah. No one asked for Gino. I kind of like Debo. I kind of like Debo. I kind of want Debo this year. He's another one that just took too many hits. Yeah. Like they ran too many plays where he just got pancaked by two guys over the middle. Yeah. Do you have one for this? Stripling. I had Stripling. Yeah. All right. Oh, we've talked about this. We circled this one, but the missionary position, we've all had them. This is getting pretty boring. Not even excited to see him in the lineup. So you think Mark Andrews for this or somebody else?

1:46:10Is this a guy that I like or I don't like?

1:46:14Bill Simmons:Neither. You're just complete. It's completely ambivalent. It's Terry McLaurin. Oh, yeah. I just, I can see that. I feel nothing. It's like, you feel nothing. I feel nothing. It's like frozen yogurt. This is where you really need to go. You really need to go to Palestine, Ohio. This is like, let's get frozen yogurt. Fine.

1:46:29Danny Heifetz:It's fine. They have a new vegan place. I literally had Terry McLaurin for this too. We're in the same place. You get the mind-milled going. Terry McLaurin taking shots here. This sucks. He's perfectly fine. There's no wiggle when you take care of McLaurin. He's never had, like, even that crazy year when the commanders were awesome. He was, like, the wide receiver, like, 16.

1:46:44Bill Simmons:Mine was Devontae Adams. Oh, yeah? He'll put up points. I just kind of know the game. You have two catches for 10 yards in the fourth quarter, and then he catches a one-yard touchdown, and his points seem okay. I'm just kind of good with him. My guy for this is, I'm going way different than you guys. I went with Jalen Hurts. just won the just won the hottest quarterback competition Maxim magazine slash Ringer Fantasy congratulations on that yeah you know it's it's spreading somebody told Baker Mayfield that he was 7th on the list in an interview he was happy about it really? yeah he looks happy anyway just like when somebody asked Bernthal about Wayne Jenkins the beams cross no but I've it's like you've I've had Jalen Hurts a bunch of times in fantasy it's great never feels great it never feels great but like during the games it's kind of like eh and then in the fourth party he scores like 15 points by the way same for the Eagles fan base I think AJ Brown and everyone has played for him yeah okay did you do one the oh yeah

1:47:45Danny Heifetz:we had Terry McLaurin too yeah

1:47:48Bill Simmons:new category how many of you watched The Sopranos I've watched some of them Out of Order which they think

1:47:55Danny Heifetz:is insane even though it was 10 years old I was 10 years old for the last season how was I supposed to watch it in order okay we don't need to get into that again

1:48:01Bill Simmons:this category is called my Vito Spadafore re-emerging, coming back to Tony Soprano like nothing ever happened and asking if he could run a construction crew again guy. Michael Thomas Jr. Right. You know what? I'm whacking you in the hotel room. We can't. There's no coming back. Wait, Brian Thomas? Brian Thomas Jr. He's like, hey, we're good, right? We're good, right? Sorry about last year. Yeah, we're good. Let's talk on Monday. And I'm whacking him that night. I will never take him again. I can't do it. It's the The scars will never heal. And that's it. Do you have a guy like that, Craig? You would just never forgive for the rest of your life?

1:48:39I got to say, I will get over it, I think. But Lamar Jackson last year was about as bad as they could possibly get. Yeah.

1:48:46Bill Simmons:He looked terrible. That's a great one. And especially if he's not going to run in the same way anymore. I don't know. I would still take him, and I'm going to trust that that was like a one-off. But like week 10 last year, I was like, I'll never look at him again. You know who I'm kind of thinking of right now? Lad McConkie. because I love Ladd and then he really betrayed us last year. He was bad. It was a tough season. I mean, he's getting beat by freaking Quentin Johnston. Yeah, this is the case. This is why we haven't gushed about Herbert and we are now at the one hour 43 minute mark. You mean the MVP of the season, Justin Herbert?

1:49:17Bill Simmons:Yeah, and it's like, oh my god, he's going to be amazing and yet nobody seems to like a single receiver he has. I'm very high on Quentin Johnston. I love Ladd. I still like Ladd. I think he's good. I like him, but it... The Pats could have taken him and instead traded back and took Jalen Polk, who's now retired from football.

1:49:36Danny Heifetz:Quite one of the worst trades there's been in a minute was that trade.

1:49:39Bill Simmons:Like a fireable offense. Do you have one for this, Ifitz? For the veto.

1:49:44Danny Heifetz:The veto. Man, I... Is there anybody who just... Who hurt you the most last year? Whack in a hotel room? The Ringer Fantasy Football League carrying Kyle Pitts' dead body for like 11 weeks. and then I released him for the playoffs and then he scored like 30 points.

1:50:00Bill Simmons:I mean, honestly, he was my guy three years ago. I'll never have him again. I laugh when other people take him. I thought it was hilarious when they gave him an extension. I'm just completely out. Craig has other ideas. Mike, goddammit, I fell for the preseason hype guy. Mine is Lane on the Ravens. Oh, yeah, that's a good call. Kind of bought in. Because for what we discussed earlier, I don't really love Zay Flower. So it's like if he's good, he might actually get real stats. I was watching their preseason game the other day, and he caught, and I was just kind of, I had the sound off. There was a play, he caught a pass, like, behind him and reeled it in, kept running.

1:50:35And I was like, who was that? That was awesome. Oh, of course it's Lane. And I was like, man, I'm kind of buying this. But then you get into the regular season, and he has probably, like, one or two catches a game. I'm like, I just can't live that life. It's going to be too, way too.

1:50:49Bill Simmons:I was impressed by the clips. Yeah, I think he could be legit, but in that offense, I don't know. Would you have Danny?

1:50:54Danny Heifetz:uh i the i for me i think it's cyrus allen for the chiefs i think that like that's the other candidate i wrote down yeah i'm like jacoby lane for the ravens i i think he's like isaac tesla where i think jacoby lane for the ravens is gonna have oh yeah that's a slot 20 catches this year eight will make sports center and kind of like how isaac tesla has all these highlights and then you're like where is other catches nope that was every catch and then i think cyrus allen actually has a shot to play for the chiefs this season in a meaningful role see when i get there's

1:51:22Bill Simmons:Chiefs hyperbole about young players they have. I now react like Yankee prospects. When the Yankees had incredible PR for all their prospects, like Dominguez, watch out. George Lombard, come on. He's fantastic. Well, that's the thing. George Lombard is really good, but I was so desensitized to all the Yankee prospects and all the guys that failed and the Volpes and everybody that when they actually had a good one, I was like, oh my God, they actually have a good one. That's Cyrus Allen. He's George Lombard. So he would have to be the George Lombard in this. I don't trust the Chiefs at all. And I think probably no team has more media connective tissue to just pump guys up.

1:51:59Bill Simmons:And I never know what to believe. All right. Two more categories. This is probably my favorite category because it really speaks to the person too. I'd never root for an injury, but he is one injury away guy. I have Tyrone Tracy. another guy who could probably win your league in the last eight games when he's just getting 25 carries a game because scataboo got hurt again come on he doesn't need this this these bad wishes upon him he's already these aren't wishes these are just bringing it upon himself just for the record you're at a draft you're just in the back of your head like yeah that guy wouldn't take a lot for him to all of a sudden be a guy who do you have greg jordan mason if aaron jones gets hurt on the vikings another good one i think could be there we saw him on the niners when McCaffrey was hurt.

1:52:49It was fantastic. He was very useful.

1:52:51Bill Simmons:He's another one when you watch the games. He just seems better than Aaron Jones. He just goes downhill. He just gets positive yards every time. Danny? I have Blake Corum for the Rams who is an awesome offense. A coach who has shown the willingness to just lean on one guy and give him all the volume. Also passes the eye test. And he's good, I think. There's so many plays last year where I couldn't tell whether it was Kyron or Corum. And Kyron was what? He was like a top 12 points guy last year. top 50 he had an awesome year and I feel the same way I've always felt like when Quorum was in I couldn't tell the difference

1:53:24Danny Heifetz:so we're talking about a guy that if the person ahead of him on the depth chart gets hurt an injury who could really step up basically I think it's gotta be Chris Ryan because I mean the guy ahead of him on the depth chart doesn't wear a seatbelt and if you think about it this is live big guy this is live I'm just saying

1:53:42Bill Simmons:I'm always one injury away but no seatbelts

1:53:44Danny Heifetz:I'm just saying you're talking about who's an injury away I'm just a little worried Chris Ryan's a great pick for this. What are the helmet thing covers? We got to get one of those for better. We got to get you a protect... You have the Romeo Dodds helmet. He just wears it everywhere. Sitting on LeBron.

1:54:01Bill Simmons:Chris Ryan flew too close to the sun with the LeBron signing. That was when the wheels have come off now. Just getting LeBron James randomly for$4 million a year. It's just too many good things. Last category. I know this is good value right now, but I simply don't want to root for him. guy. It can't be Deshaun Watson because don't be able to take him in the draft. This doesn't mean you personally hate the guy. You just maybe don't like his style of play. Maybe he's burned you in the past, but who do you have?

1:54:30Danny Heifetz:Yeah, I guess the Browns shouldn't count. For me, it's... I know you love Garrett Wilson and the Jets, but for me, it's Garrett Wilson and the Jets because everything on paper, I just... It makes so much sense that Garrett Wilson is so talented and Geno Smith and the Jets can be better, but I'm like, Frank Reich's been out of the NFL for two years. the two years before that he was in the NFL he got fired mid-season both times he was terrible at Stanford Aaron Glenn is just a lame duck fired a third of his staff three weeks after the season ended I'm like I've seen this Jets season a thousand times this is like the third time since I've been at the Ringer that they're like trying to make a last gas to save the coaching staff I mean and I just don't want the Jets I don't want the vibes in November the Frank Reich thing is crazy that he's calling it's like remember when like Francis Ford Coppola making Megalopoli you're like he's making a move somebody hired him he's doing this Holy shit.

1:55:16Wait, is Frank Reich like just funding the whole thing himself? you're like Adam Driver, like Shia LaBeouf, Aubrey Plaza.

1:55:23Bill Simmons:This is, fantasy's just slumped over right now. You just fucking killed fantasy. I'm like, Garrett Wilson's good. Like the offensive line is good. He's the Coquitlam Frank Reich analogy. Fantasy's dead. Like we're doing this? Damn. All right. It is. He was probably the worst head coach this decade, right? Was Urban Meyer this decade? Oh, 2021. yeah, Urban's taking the crown. Frank Drake was the worst coach of the last three years, I think. It's like the documentary about Megalopolis is better than Megalopolis, and I feel the same way about the Jets. I want to know. I'd rather watch the documentary of Frank Reich calling plays than watch Frank Reich call plays.

1:55:57Bill Simmons:It's really tough. Who do you have, DK? Jackson Dart? I don't know. He just annoys me. You guys hate Dart, man. I don't hate Dart. Now I'm defending the Giants. I just I just like it's partly a bit because I'm just trying to trigger Heifetz but my guy I know it's good value I don't want to root for him Jalen Hurts I'm kind of like Eagles offense maybe I'm putting too much emphasis on the Petula last year offense but like rooting for I had Jalen Hurts and AJ Brown last year and man it was third and ten and I felt like I had no hope like there was just no shot and Jalen Hurts it all feels gimmicky mine is Kyler Murray can't do it again you're a body language doctor he's the worst body language quarterback in a long time it's really a bummer because he also he's a false hope guy and he does put up points right you read any fantasy piece this year it's like hey by the way Kyler Murray here are his stats and they're pretty good him and Malik Willis are the two late round quarterback if you're going to take anyone Kyler Murray or Malik Willis

1:57:03Danny Heifetz:Kyler was the number one pick in top ten in baseball and Kyler has made a bad playoff. Kyler has been elite in fantasy. Malik Willis has six touchdowns in like three, four years. I'm not just saying they're close. They're similar picks. They are, but Kyler's going to play all year.

1:57:18Bill Simmons:But it goes deeper. There's more there. It's just not fun to have him on the team. Yeah. It's too frustrating. He'll rope you in. You'll be like, oh, I actually might have struck oil on this. And then he'll beat Kyler Murray in the next game. I just, the body language is bad. I think that's the big, I think that is probably the number one biggest question in fantasy this year is like, what Kevin O 'Connell did with Darnold in Minnesota, can that happen again with Kyler? And if it does, everybody in the Vikings is one of the best picks. He's really getting a lot of credit for the Darnold thing, who, by the way, was a top three pick in the NFL draft and was in the shittiest possible circumstances.

1:57:57Bill Simmons:But can you make the same argument for Kyler, I think he's saying. No, no, I'm saying like, I think KOC is now being presented as a miracle worker. he's just where were the miracles with jj mccarthy yeah he's just i think no miracle scene in that

1:58:09Danny Heifetz:one he was fucking terrible i honestly do think grant udinski who went to the jaguars was a lot of what's going on in minnesota and i think kevin again kevin o 'connell is just a tall very striking man with a great jawline and i do think they made him a quarterback whisperer i think the key with the vikings is you take kyler mary and justin jefferson but you got to trade him before gta 6 comes out because if kyler love call of duty but the gta 6 drop off for kyler's great pretty big

1:58:28Bill Simmons:I think KOC is on my first coach fired watch whoa

1:58:32Danny Heifetz:that's no way

1:58:33Bill Simmons:yeah I said it first coach fired I think first coach fired is really the Ringer Gambling guys were talking about this yesterday the first coach fired is really hard to figure out this year because we had so much turnover and you're basically looking at Dan Quinn Zach Taylor Aaron Glenn Aaron Glenn but why would you fire Aaron Glenn he's my best asset to get the number one pick Kevin O 'Connell Todd Bowles Todd Bowles and then probably a wild card that we're not considering. Somebody was like, oh my God, the Vikings started out one and four and they just fired KFC. I can't believe it. And then the media would go nuts because they all love him.

1:59:08Bill Simmons:But I don't know. He's on my radar. I think that division is going to be really hard. People don't seem to know where to place him either. But if I had to pick a fourth place team in the NFC North, I think that's the obvious pick, right?

1:59:22Danny Heifetz:Would you say Green Bay? I think they'd be. I mean, how much could have gone wrong for Minnesota that didn't go wrong last year. They won nine games. I'm like, I just think they're going to make the playoffs. The defense is good enough. How many good players do they have, though? Like, for real? Well, I mean, I think Derisaw is good. I mean, first of all, everyone on the offense is a first-round pick. Jefferson's a first-round pick. Addison's a first-round pick. Hawkinson hurt his knee. He's a first-round pick. Kyler was first pick in two different leagues. I know he's been hurt, but I'm like...

1:59:45Bill Simmons:Arizona paid Kyler to leave. He was like a$50 million cap hit, and they were like, just go.

1:59:52Danny Heifetz:The flip side, he's 1 ,000th highest-paid player in the NFL. Do you like Minnesota, Danny? Not like particularly. No.

2:00:01Bill Simmons:I think missing that McCarthy thing. I think when you miss picks like that, it's devastating. Yeah. You know? I've been leaning away from Minnesota more. Like I'm more worried about taking a guy like Justin Jefferson. I feel like all the other receivers are just like more dependable. I just get nervous about like the Kyler thing. Yeah. It's weird to be in that world now where you see Jefferson, you're like, ugh. Yeah, I'm like, meh. I don't know. Last year was the first year. just felt like he wasn't standing out. And it was because of the quarterbacks. Right.

2:00:28Danny Heifetz:But that's why the receivers can't be normal. God forbid. Like Jefferson actually was like the most professional receiver, elite receiver we've seen in that situation probably ever, who handled it really well and handled everything professionally.

2:00:39Bill Simmons:Larry Fitz would like a word.

2:00:40Danny Heifetz:Fair enough.

2:00:41Bill Simmons:Larry Fitz had like four years of just shit. Yeah. All right, that's it, guys. So give us the schedule for the rest of the way here for you guys for the show. So we're doing shows every Monday, Wednesday, Friday until the season. But yeah, so this Friday, the 28th, we're doing the live Netflix draft at 11 a.m. Pacific with all of us, with Sal and Chang and House and Chris and Mal and Sean and Van Tate. That'll be really fun. And then the week after that, we'll be doing the Tate Purge right after Labor Day weekend. We've got a live show at the Fonda on Thursday. We've got a live show in Hollywood this Thursday at the Fonda.

2:01:15Bill Simmons:And you have, you're stepping in for rewatchables on the Monday before football season. That's right. Do you want to say the movie or keep it secret? I always like saying it yeah you are you're a man of the people yeah I think it's fun say the movie the three of us are going to do Talladega Nights which is which I can't believe hasn't been done I know there's still some really good movies left that have not been done yeah we're 451 in we're not slowing down yeah no but yeah so you guys are going to do that and then and that's it four episodes a week

2:01:44Danny Heifetz:during the season too so people stick with us during the season as well and it's on Netflix as well

2:01:47Bill Simmons:when are you going to have your Super Bowl pick ooh right before the season, I guess. Yeah, we usually do that the Wednesday. Do you know it in your head? Repeat. You have to pick a repeat. Come on.

2:02:00Danny Heifetz:I think I might, actually. I love it. Can't pick the Rams. Come on. Super Bowl champions are under... People always forget how good Super Bowl champions do navigate.

2:02:10Bill Simmons:Five days in a row I've mailed house, the Rams won't make the playoffs, but on Fando, plus 350. Rams will miss the playoffs. it's like an easier path than you'd think. Well, they're also an injury house of cards. That's why it's an easier path. It's Stafford. It's Puka. It's like two things, and that team is 6-11. Garrett's already banged up a little bit. Yeah. I can hope. I can dream. So my schedule is, me and Sal live on Netflix on Thursday. We're doing the NFC win total over-unders. The second one's going on Sunday. I'm going to be in the draft with you guys. I was on, Conspiracy Bill was on, wait a second this week, with Jason and Tyler.

2:02:50Bill Simmons:And it was also on the Flops draft with Phenasy. Oh, yeah. I wanted to listen to that. Yeah. CR took, we vetoed a CR pick. I think he's still upset. Ooh, a rare L. Yeah, he's still mad. I don't, I didn't, they're worried he might not come back. So that is all that's happening. Thank you, fellas. Pleasure to do this as always. Thanks to Eduardo and Gajal, Jack Wilson, everybody behind the scenes as well. And I'll see you on Netflix on Thursday.

2:03:18Bill Simmons:On the wayside that I once said I don't have feelings within On the wayside On the wayside Must be 21 plus and present in select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 plus and present in D.C., Kentucky or Wyoming. Game problem, call 1-800-GAMBLE or 1-800-MY-RESET. Call 888-797-777 or visit ccpg.org slash chat in Connecticut or mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24-7 support in Massachusetts. or call 877-8-HOPE-NY or text HOPE-NY in New York for Louisiana. Call 877-770-7867. This episode is brought to you by my old friend, NFL Sunday Ticket.

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