Opposites Attract

20:17Yeah.

20:17Clair Buckley:What did I do? I can't remember. No. And then I just call you. Exactly. In the car. You do do that. How are you getting on? Just seeing how you're doing. How far have you got now? Seven miles? Okay. I've got another message here from Spencer. Spencer. My wife recently called me out for something I hadn't noticed before, and now I can't stop noticing it. It's awful, that. When you notice something, you do. Sometimes it's best to sort of let things just run their course. Sometimes you get into little habits and you keep sort of doing something, making a noise or something like that. Sometimes it's best to don't draw attention to it.

20:59I feel like I'm quite bad for that with you, though. I always point stuff out to you.

21:02Clair Buckley:Yeah, you like to point things out about what I'm doing wrong. Spencer says, I'm a huge comedy fan and I have consumed all there is to see of British comedy. The problem is I've watched so much, it inevitably makes its way into my daily conversations. Put it this way. If anyone ever asks me what I do, it takes all my might not to say I'm a friend first, boss second, probably entertainer third. Is that David Brann? Yeah, you know it is. Even your character in The Inbetweeners has a starring role in many of my conversations. If I had a pound for every time someone tells me they're going out with a mate and I follow up with all friends, I'd be a very rich man.

21:43Clair Buckley:And that's just the family friendly stuff I say from your character's mouth. I don't want to make any assumptions, but I believe James will understand this plight and maybe even have a case of it himself. Oh, absolutely. You do. Spencer says, am I going crazy or is this normal? Spencer, I'm with you. You are going crazy. It's not normal. I do things all the time he just needs to come out and come and hang out with you and Joe, you and Joe Thomas you and Joe Thomas have literal conversations for so long and it's just turns into a whole episode of The Office yeah like you say something and then he'll reply with an office line and then you and I'll just keep going and going until one of us can't remember the next line which never happens no So here's an example for you.

22:37Clair Buckley:What's your name? Spencer. Here's an example for you, Spencer, where I am totally with you. In the early days when we first got together and I was ordering a curry and they were like, how many poppadoms? And I went, how many poppadoms? And you put your hand up with five fingers. And I just went, fab. Which is a really obscure partridge quote. And to be honest, I can't even remember off the top of my head right now when Partridge actually says it. I didn't even know that was a Partridge thing. I thought that was just you. Fair. Because you've been doing that for years. Well, then it became a thing.

23:15But it becomes a thing for you because I get dead embarrassed because I know there's a person on the other end of that phone.

23:21Clair Buckley:I know. And I'm like, why are you doing that? I don't consider that. I always forget. I'm like that with phones. I don't think there's an actual person on the end of it. Yeah. There's another thing that I like to do as well for all you bottom fans out there. So we never give our home number out. We've all got mobile phones, right? So if the landline calls, it's usually someone asking me if I've been in an accident recently or if I've got PPI payments or something like that. It's usually a scam. I know what you're going to do. so whenever the home phone rings and it could be anyone and sometimes I forget that the school has our home number yes absolutely but I but they only call that if our phones they'll try you first then me next and then they'll phone the home phone and can I say what you do so people know this is real because you do do this in the living room go on where the phone is yeah hello 444 I do I love it he does that all the time just pick up the phone hello 444 444 And I'm like Oh sorry Yes this is Mr Buckley Oh I'll be right there Yeah Harrison shit himself again Don't say that Oh Five Was from Alan Partridge's Countdown to World Cup 94 Was that Goal Eat my goal Shit That was liquid football.

24:56Do you think you're good at that?

24:58Clair Buckley:That is a goal. He must have a foot like a traction engine. Stop feeding on them. Enough. What about me? Do I look cool? No. Well, do I? No. Do I really look cool? Do I? Do I? Do I? Okay. Spencer, I've got absolutely no idea what you're talking about, mate. And I cannot relate at all. I want to hear from Spencer's wife. That's who I want to hear from. Because I get it, hen. I get it. I've got another one here. Oh, we've got a few emails. Here's one from Lewis who says, hello. In case you may be wondering, I'm the same guy who came up with the shit invention for the popping off bed sheet. Oh, yeah, Lewis.

25:46Clair Buckley:It wasn't a shit invention. It was. Well, Lewis says, anyway, as of writing, Father's Day is approaching or might have already been, depending on when you get this. I want to talk about the time when my partner was in labour and I required more medical attention than she did. Or did I? Lewis, you're a liability, mate. So 15 hours in total, we were sat in this room. Couldn't close my eyes Couldn't even breathe without being shouted at The decision was made This needed to be done by C-section Well that was it I got hot, I felt sick The room started spinning I had nurses, midwives, even a doctor at one point Surrounding me A midwife calling me down with a newspaper The nurse taking my observations And the doctor asking about my previous health issues Completely unaware Whilst I was going through my medical crisis my darling partner was screaming bloody mary and was preparing herself to be operated on all on her own no surprise i still haven't heard the end of it absolutely horrendous podcast piss poor five stars yeah you've not come through for it there lewis i'll be honest with you mate listen as a man there's not a lot um that guys can do in the old um birth situation right the delivery room Yeah.

27:14Clair Buckley:Unless I am a doctor or something like that, I can't really help out. Yeah. Yeah. The only thing you're supposed to do, Lewis, is not faint. No, just be supportive. You just got to go, oh, this will be all right. This will be okay. I was there. I remember I was talking so much bullshit. I think I spoke about it before. Which was the one that took forever? Judd. Judd was two days. Right. I was in labour. And it was like they kept going, you're not dilated enough. You've still got a while to go yet. And then you wouldn't see the doctor for about another two hours or something like that. Yeah. And during that two hours, I was just spent the whole time going, listen, when this doctor comes in next, I'm sure he's going to say, you are so dilated.

27:56Clair Buckley:Everything's going to be fine. This is going great. What are you worried about? Oh, well, the doctor looked worried when he came in. No, he was just, he was thinking about something else. And in my head, I'm going, oh, yeah, the fucking doctor did look a bit worried. I don't know what the fuck's going on here. This was just. I'm absolutely shitting myself but to you I was going next time our doctor comes in that baby's going to fly out don't you worry yeah this was Jude and then he would come in and it would be like yeah you're three centimetres and I was like I've already been here for a day what do you mean and I was going oh it's fine this is how it works isn't it babies this is totally everything's normal and everything's fine everything's totally normal but I didn't know what the fuck was going on either I know you didn't know I know but I'm not going to say I'm not going to let my thoughts go I think this might be a bit of a fucking mess babe I think we're in the shit here sweetheart no listen I think Lewis did the worst thing that would really piss me off if you had fainted and became and the doctors were all run you I'd be so annoyed I would be like it's annoying when someone fights while you're in labour I'd be like I knew you would do this I knew you would do this No, my mum fainted during my first labour.

29:14Clair Buckley:It was hilarious. To be fair, she'd had... Teeth out? Yeah, she'd been to the dentist. She'd been to the dentist, so she'd had local anaesthetic. Yeah. She hadn't eaten all day. And then I went into labour. Because she was about to have some dinner, and then we ended up going to the hospital or whatever. And then she did... It was like a cartoon faint. she like put her hand up. I don't think she put her hand up. And I like had to grab her to stop her from falling. Yeah. And then you were in the bed sucking on that thing. Gassing there, yeah. Like you're trying to have a baby and you were sat up like looking at her and I was like trying to cushion her fall.

29:59Clair Buckley:And then I went, hello. Yeah, James, the most panicked I've ever seen James. He was holding my mum on the floor. I'm inactive labor. I turned really posh. Yeah, he went, excuse me. I went, hello. Hello, can anyone help me? Because I was like, what are you talking like that for? She was out. She was out. Yeah. They took her out. They gave her some toast and a cup of tea and stuff. Yeah. She's going to love us for telling this again. This is from Matt. Matt says, hello, James and Claire. Hate the podcast. Always have to listen to it for some bloody reason. I don't care how you listen to it. I don't care if you enjoy it as long as you listen to it.

30:43Thanks, Matt. We appreciate you.

30:44Clair Buckley:Growing up, my mother insisted my siblings and I had to learn an instrument. Yeah, it's a good thing to learn. Yeah, it's a good thing. After my piano teacher kept yelling at me, I decided I wanted to change. Introducing the coolest instrument of them all, the saxophone. Oh, the saxophone is cool. That is cool. Which was far more convenient than my sister, who out of protest chose the French horn. Fast forward to about year nine, when there was so much more to life than learning to become the next John Coltrane. My mother was steadfast in her commitment to my musical education and would not let an evening go by without the enforcement of practice.

31:26Yeah, see, that's where you lose them.

31:27Clair Buckley:One evening alone in the living room with sax in hand, I blew my top. I smashed my sax against the sofa. Now, saxophones are not cheap. Having realised what I had done, I came up with a plan. I took it into school the next day when my lesson was scheduled, which I forgot the time of. Making sure to put it in its soft case, not the hard one. Upon arriving home, I opened it and acted shocked that someone else had dumped their instrument on mine in its soft case and severely dented it. To this day, my mum still believes this saxophone sacrilege was not my fault and I think it's time to come clean.

32:10Does your mum listen to the podcast?

32:12Clair Buckley:Well, Matt hates listening to it, so I don't know if his mum listens to it, but Matt's mum, that saxophone was Matt. He'd had enough. This is the problem, though. when parents make you do it too much when you don't want to do it. There's a fine line and I think we've also talked about this, haven't we? Because our oldest plays a lot of instruments. Harrison's a very talented musician. I'd like to see him practice more. Well, that's the thing. I don't want to make it into a thing. Yeah, you don't want to turn it into an argument that you have to have all the time because it turns them off. I want it to be his thing that he enjoys.

32:54Absolutely, yeah. So it's tricky

32:57Clair Buckley:Perotting is tricky It is Perotting's a fucking It is Because when I used to dance My gran was the one That took me to dancing And she made me practice All the time And it did It made me hate it Yeah But then you understand Like looking back now I understand why she did that Because I was good And she wanted to Push me And make me You know Maybe go somewhere where And you just don't You don't think about it You've got trophies and stuff And things And ribbons I've got ribbons I've got loads of trophies Right Well, there you go. Matt's mum. It was Matt. Matt smashed up his saxophone in a rage. Wow.

33:33Let's have a little swipe and then I've got a feature for you. Okay.

33:38Clair Buckley:Hey, Claire, it's time for a feature. This week, we're going Buck in the Day, brought to you by McDonald's. Jingle me. Tell your family, tell your friends. Things were so much better then. I just really want to say. How I miss bugging the day. Now, if you're a regular listener to this podcast, you know that it's very rare that I go through a whole episode without mentioning the 90s. I love reminiscences. That's Claire. That was very delicately done there, Claire. Thanks. I'm a little delicate flower, mate. Which is how we managed to stumble on one of my favourite features. buck in the day. Before we do get into it, a little reminder, keep your buck in the day memories coming in by emailing thebuckleys at platformmedia.uk or you can message us at thebuckleyspod on Instagram and TikTok or send us a voice note 0203 951 4651.

34:44Clair Buckley:We have a letter. A letter?

34:49Clair Buckley:We have a letter here from Adam. He is 11 buck in the day. So we've got a letter here from Adam. Adam says, hello, Buckleys. I want to reminisce about birthdays. Over the years, they become less important. I have a theory as to why. I think it's because nothing, and I mean nothing, compared to having a McDonald's birthday party when you were a kid. That was the peak of childhood The private little area Just for you and your mates The balloons and of course the food Having a party at McDonald's Is one of the most vivid childhood memories I can even remember the smell And every time I nip into one That smell transports me right back That's actually true Thinking about having my 40th in a Mackey's And I know more of my mates would come Cheers Adam I would come I think Adam's onto something.

35:43Yeah.

35:43Clair Buckley:I'm 40 next year. I definitely think your classic 90s McDonald's birthday party for people in their 30s and 40s. Yeah. I think that's a thing. Did you have a McDonald's birthday party? Do you know what? I don't think I did. You'd know if you did. I don't think I did. now but i so my dad um you know how you just you know you just like remember stuff so my dad used to love a mcdonald's but obviously back in the day we are back in the day we would only go like it like on a special occasion or maybe like a weekend right now see i lived right next door to my whole estate did you? no we had to we had to travel I had a whole estate it was like this say this is the estate this isn't going to work for audio no it's a circle it's a circle and then right next to that circle was a big McDonald's right so you went all the time yeah I didn't but constantly meeting at McDonald's it was a place where we met well when I got older we would meet at the McDonald's we would always go to McDonald's in Komarnock and I just remember being little in just thinking that those fries were the best thing I'd ever had in my entire life.

37:06Clair Buckley:I didn't get a McDonald's birthday party. Did you not? No, I went to many. I never really ever had a birthday party. Oh, guys, have we got the violin? Did you forget the violins again for James? No, it's because of, listen, it's not a, it's not a thing, it's not a mean thing. It wasn't just because my parents were being mean or anything like that. It was because my birthday was during the summer holidays. As soon as school finished, you were out. You were out of the loop. That's true. You didn't see everyone every day and stuff like that. So I never really had a big birthday party. Right. Because it'd be really difficult to get everyone together and to let them know this is when the birthday party's happening.

37:45Fair, fair. Did you ever take a girl on a date to McDonald's? Yeah, of course I did.

37:51Clair Buckley:It was the only place we had in Dagenham. Did you? Yeah. Who? I can't remember off the top of my head. Sure you can. I can actually. I can actually, but I don't want to say. Go on, what's her name? Kirstie. I was about nine at the time or something. And did you pay? Yes, I did. I genuinely think if there was a McDonald's restaurant somewhere, if there was one of the restaurants somewhere that wanted to go back to the 90s and make a little section. Absolutely. Huge. the you know 40th birthdays and stuff yeah i would want to do my birthday oh oh yeah you would in fact i would have you seen them people do weddings and stuff and they get mcdonald's after the you know like after the dinner and then we're like a little evening thing and i always thought damn that was such a good idea yeah one of the things I remember when I was when I was like 18 19 going like for a night when you woke up you were feeling a little bit rough the dream was always if McDonald's delivered then your life would be absolutely perfect and now it does and do you know something our kids will never know that feeling when I was in the flat before I met you my flat was used to be in a really good location it was in a hub it did yeah we'd go out the night and then everyone would just end up back at my at my flat yeah and then we'd all wake up the next day and it was like who's going yeah and hurry up as well because it's the cutoffs at 10 30 yeah yeah um which i think they've extended nowadays i'd say the the times where we hit mcdonald's the most is after school hockey practice after hockey after swimming anything that they're doing right now listen to this question drive through yeah do you ever do that thing where you go to the drive through order the meals whatever you're getting and then eat some fries in the bag on the way home never and I tell the kids off for doing that as well I always do I say keep it sealed I always do no I never do it yeah no but when you go to the drive through it's not sealed they do they just roll it over yeah they roll it over so when I get the bag I then crimp it a bit more with my hands Yeah, but before you do that.

40:17Clair Buckley:And then I hand it to either you or one of the kids and I feel like that's safe because I've got to drive. And then I turn to my left and Jude's like that. And I go, keep it, because my stuff's in there as well. It's not just your fries. Do you know there was one time that me and James did a McDonald's drive-thru and he was driving and we were going home and he put the heat seater on, put the McDonald's on the warm chair It made me sit in the back all the way home. It was a little system that I came up with. Yeah, I know. Made me move. I forgot about that. Well, it's just a system that I came up with.

40:57Like all the heating, like the air con was off. Yeah. The chair was warm. I got moved to the back.

41:05Clair Buckley:Yeah. I used to do that even during the summer and stuff. Oh, so James always says this thing whenever, you know, like if you're at traffic lights or you're in a bit of a busy road or whatever, in the police, you hear them coming from the back and they overtake every day. James always goes, he's got a McDonald's in there. Because that's just how he thinks. That's what I would do if I was a police officer and I'd just gone through a drive-thru. He's got fresh nuggets and he just wants to get home. Just traffic. Woo!

41:41Clair Buckley:Hey, quick, very quick question, Claire. Okay. To wrap this up, right? Okay. So McDonald's, they've got a few nicknames on the go, haven't they? Right. Right? Yeah. I mean, I've only got one coming into my head. Is that what you're going to ask me? What do I call it? Let's, from this day, from going forward from now, let's just go, this is it. Now, you've got Mackie's. Yep. You've got Maccas. Right. Grab a Maccas. Okay. Mackie D's. That's the one. That's the one. That's the one. Nothing else counts, right? No. I do like the Golden Arches. That gets me excited. Because when you do see them on like a long journey, you think, ah.

42:29Clair Buckley:It's like, listen, don't get me wrong. when I have seen the Golden Arches, I've had to go to work and you're in some country that you've never been before and you don't know how to speak the language and stuff. And then you see the Golden Arches. Right. And what do you hear? There you go. Right. That was bucking the day, guys. Right. That's it for this week's episode of The Buckleys. Thank you very much for listening. We do appreciate it. Remember, you can get in touch with your stories and questions by emailing thebuckleys at platformmedia.uk or you can message us at thebuckleyspod on Instagram and TikTok and don't forget to follow and subscribe to the show on Spotify whatever podcast app that you like to use I saw even once and if you're feeling extra generous why not go ahead and leave us a review all that is left is for Claire to say see you next Thursday oh are we allowed to say that can we say that I don't know hey chiefs go to chiefs