398 - "I Want to See Your Face One More Time"

0:00Bruce Whipple:I want to talk today about something serious, but not morbid. It's about time. And more specifically, it's about the fact that time is fleeting and none of us knows how much of it we have left. This past weekend, I visited one of my closest friends. He's been one of my best friends for 49 years, almost half a century. He has lived with prostate cancer for a long time, but now he also has pancreatic cancer. He is wheelchair bound. He's lost more than 90 pounds. His speech is a little labored, and he has months to live. He's also a doctor, so he knows exactly what's happening and what the score is.

0:45Bruce Whipple:I had been speaking with him quite a bit by phone, and I told him, if you need anything, day or night, do not hesitate to give me a call. His answer really did stop me. He said, I want to see your face one more time. That is why I went to see him this past weekend. It was a tough visit, to be sure. And I will tell you honestly, seeing him was shocking. There is no polite way to dress that up. When someone you have known for 49 years is sitting in front of you, physically diminished, knowing that his time is short, it hits you in a way that words do not fully capture. But I'm not sharing this to depress you.

1:32Bruce Whipple:I'm sharing this because there is a lesson here, and it applies to life, business, family, friendships, and the way you choose to spend the time you have. Most people, especially when you're young, act as if your time is unlimited. It is not. Most people act as if there will always be another chance to make the call, take the trip, apologize, forgive, say thank you, or tell someone what they meant to you. There may not be. There's a dangerous lie we tell ourselves. I'll get to it later. Later is not guaranteed. And when you're dealing with someone who is dying, later may become never very quickly.

2:20Bruce Whipple:So here's the first lesson. Do not wait to spend time with the people who matter to you. A phone call is good. A text is better than nothing. But sometimes you need to show up. You need to get in the car. You need to get on a plane. You need to sit in the same room. You need to look the person in the eye. Because at the end, people do not usually ask for another email. They do not ask for another spreadsheet. They do not ask for another business plan, my friend asked to see my face one more time. That should tell you something. The second lesson is stop wasting your life on things that do not matter.

3:06Bruce Whipple:I say this to my business acquisition mentees all the time. You say you want to build something. You say you want to acquire a business. You say you want to create wealth or freedom and a better life for your family. Fine. Then act like time matters because it does. Do not spend months pretending to prepare. Do not confuse thinking with doing. Do not keep telling yourself you are almost ready. You are not promised 20 more years. You are not promised 10 years. You are not even promised next year. That does not mean you should panic. It means you should get serious. And there's a big difference.

3:51Bruce Whipple:Panic creates chaos. Seriousness creates action. The third lesson is this. Relationships are not a side issue. A lot of ambitious people get this wrong. They think success is only about money, deals, titles, and accomplishments. Those things matter to be sure, and I'm not going to pretend that they do not. But when someone is near the end, the scoreboard changes. The question is not, how many emails did you answer? The question is, who loved you? Who did I love? Who showed up? Who did I help? Did my life matter to the people closest to me? That is the scoreboard that gets very real at the end.

4:41The fourth lesson is, say what needs to be said when the person can still hear it. Do not save all those kind words for the funeral. Tell people now. Tell your spouse. Tell your children. Tell your friends. Tell the mentor who helped you. Tell the mentee you're proud of. Tell the person who made the difference in your life. It does not have to be theatrical. It does not have to be perfect. It just has to be said. Because one day the opportunity to say it directly may be gone. And the final lesson is this. Use mortality as a teacher, not as a source of despair. We are all going to die. That is not pessimism.

5:30It's just reality. The question is, what are you going to do with the time between now and then? Are you going to drift? Are you going to make excuses? Are you going to keep putting off important things? Or are you going to take action? Are you going to make the call? Are you going to send the letter? Are you going to have the conversation? Are you going to visit a friend? Are you going to build the life you said you want? For my business acquisition mentees, this matters directly. If you're pursuing acquisitions, stop acting as if you have unlimited runway. You do not. Learn the craft. Make the calls.

6:14Build the board. Contact the sellers. Follow up. Take the meeting. Do the work. And outside of business, do the human work too. Visit the people who matter. Say the words that need to be said. Do not wait until someone is too weak, too sick, or too far gone to receive them. This weekend reminded me of something I already knew but needed to feel again. Time is fleeting. The people we love will not be here forever, and neither will we. So use the time. Do not waste it. Do not drift through it. Do not assume there will always be more. because someday someone may simply say, I want to see your face one more time.

7:04And when they do, I hope you go.