9 Minutes to Remind You Why Gratitude Is the #1 Ingredient for Happiness

0:00Perspective. It's so interesting to me why I deem myself happy because I just am so grateful. Things like the thing we got excited about of the data behind being a human being is 400 trillion to one. When you just start there and you realize forget about the odds of beating homelessness or being born in a communist country. Just actually becoming a human. I always make the joke of your mom could have had another glass of wine. and like where your dad could have been late and the odds are so insane. I'm just so grateful for what I have versus what I don't have and I think people just have all these admirations and envy and all these hard wiring things.

0:45To me it's perspective. Just like I just genuinely believe there's always somebody that has it worse and the problem is that's where I default into mentally and have practiced to put myself there versus somebody's got it better. I know a lot of you say I hate luck. Let me tell you what luck is. Luck is that you were built in a way where that is genuinely the way you feel because then you actually do it, because you love it, and then enormously awesome shit happens to you. So how do you think I worked so hard? Because I'm filled with gratitude that I was built that way because that gift, that fucking gift, is the fucking thing.

1:17This is the GaryVee Audio Experience. I just really, really believe in what I see.

1:27Gary Vaynerchuk:and I have like just incredible appetite and ambition to try to scale it. I see a clear path to how we can get there which is grounded on building up self-esteem, countering hate with love. Right now we're so hate on hate. Triggered? Right? I'm like, I go triggered and it hurts. Like every single person that says you suck, it hurts. Everyone. I wonder if I can get others to see themselves the way I do which is just like a, like kind of like an empty pipe. I'm just an empty pipe. It's like, you give me accolades, my mom. You shit on me, you just don't know me. It's all empty. It's just like, I think of ego, confidence, and humility as a triangle.

2:16Gary Vaynerchuk:It's not even like a triangle because usually that's like a thing together. It's like just these constellation of like three things. The game is like if you can just focus just on, hey, you have self-esteem, I'm a good person, I'm doing the best I can. Doing the best I can.

2:34Gary Vaynerchuk:And humility, if it's going well, being like, yeah, okay, there's eight billion people on Earth, I'm sure there's billions that are doing it better than me, better looking me, nicer me, smarter me. If you can play on that, you win. If you go to ego, which is just insecurity, it's all over. I think a lot about that.

2:54Gary Vaynerchuk:It's like ego, which is just pure insecurity. You think you're shit, so then you make pretend that you're good. You think you're shit, so it's lack of self-confidence, so then you spend all your time shitting on everybody else and fake pretending that you're good. Posturing. All to protect that you're weak. The reason I give so much trust, you know this, is because I'm strong. You fuck me, cool. You lost, not me. Compassion is really, like the difference between empathy and compassion is something I've been spending a lot of time for. There's a lot of people who like are nice and they're like, there's like a lot of sensitive people that are nice but their weakness and their insecurity creates some areas where they lash out and aren't nice.

3:37Gary Vaynerchuk:It's a funny one because if you're sensitive and empathetic, you do have feelings, you actually have a lot of good but it's your weakness and your sensitivity that's causing your bad. That's why some of the shit I heard at VCon, this guy's got to get in, he's got 18 ,000 Instagram followers. Come on. What does that even mean? Like, who talks like that? Everyone wants to go there so fast. Like, posture. People's intent is selfish because they're trying to plug holes. My mother and my circumstance plugged my holes before they started so I'm a grown-up with no holes. Of course I have holes, but like, fuck a lot less than a lot of people.

4:17Gary Vaynerchuk:People live their whole life trying to close their holes. I'm like, the holes are closed. So fuck it. Let me go close other people's holes. I'm fucking closing other people's holes. So I think a lot about these thoughts. Like, because when you're confident but humble, you're just balancing. You know? You're purpling. Purpling. Also, if you lack self-esteem, you're in trouble. Like that's just, if you don't think you're good, it's over before it started. You lost when you woke up.

5:02Gary Vaynerchuk:Now a lot of people that are sensitive or soft or insecure lash because they want to attack first. Because in their mind they're like if I stay passive here they're gonna hurt me. So I'm gonna hurt you first. Start, you know? A lot of managers, insecure. They're like, I'm gonna put down that person right now. Let me start beating them down. Make them weaker so they don't get me. It all starts with shit. I'm like, hey! Because nobody's doing shit to me. It's not fucking happening. All eight billion can be like, you know what? We all decided you suck. I'm like, cool, let's go. Give me first eight billion.

5:41Gary Vaynerchuk:You know what I mean? which is why I want to get everybody to understand you're good. Like seriously, everybody, like fuck man. I really talked to camera like fuck it. Like Jesus, like what? Everybody else stinks too. Like you're doing the best you can. Like you'll be better tomorrow. Like beating yourself up, it makes no sense. There's just no logic to it. I understand why you do it. Somebody, you know, your dad told you you sucked. So he said you suck. Like I get it. But it's just not true. It's not true that you suck. It's not. You think you suck. Which then triggers everything else. You can just change your mind.

6:17Gary Vaynerchuk:You can. You can love yourself. How can you be kind to anybody else if you're not kind to yourself? How? Impossible, you have no energy to give. This crazy combo once where, I was like, I just wanted the money and all this and I was like, you have health. I was like, do you want to know about my You know any of your friends who have terminal cancer? You wanna switch? No? Why not focus then on what you do now?

6:56Gary Vaynerchuk:Just got a lot of good feelings from like, I feel really reinvigorated. I feel more ambitious. Like I'm like, okay, let's fucking go. like 1 % of the time. Like it doesn't feel daunting to me. I'm a good bricklayer. At 22, it didn't feel daunting to me that I was gonna give a decade and a half to my dad and then start. Same now. I'm like, okay. 6.2 billion people not happy. Let's go. One, two. I'm gonna get you today. I'm gonna get you today. Tomorrow I'm gonna get somebody else. And in four days, I'm gonna get somebody else watching this. For 19 days. And in 27 days, I'm gonna get somebody who's gonna get somebody else that I couldn't have gotten to.

7:37Gary Vaynerchuk:Brick by brick by brick by brick by brick. Just a game of laminate. It's the most binary simple game on earth. People just want to be loved, but they don't realize they have to struggle with themselves and they have to accept self-awareness. You're not going to be an athlete. You're not going to be a billionaire. You're not going to be a supermodel. Cool. Go be something else. And that leads to everything. The reason I've always innovated is I'm not scared to fail. We gotta figure out how to get everybody to love themselves. Which is why we have to change success from money. Because not everybody has skills to make money.

8:17Gary Vaynerchuk:But we can teach everybody to have skills in being content and happy with what they have. Ratitude. I really want it. It's a game of why not.

8:29Gary Vaynerchuk:Why wouldn't you want the world to be happier? it's a better world.

8:45Hey everybody, if you enjoyed this podcast, please go back and look at the prior episodes. They're loaded. I appreciate your attention and thanks for being part of this journey. See you later.