THIS Is The 1.5 Hr Car Ride That Will Change Your Business Strategy For GOOD | GaryVee Backseat Q&A Pt.2

0:28Hey everybody, I know everybody freaked for yesterday's episode. Yes, let's go to it. We have Liz asked, I started my business at 50 years old and it's successful, but I still have issues with imposter syndrome and confidence and raising my pricing. How to overcome that? I don't know her, but whether it's riding a bike, swimming, kissing someone for the first time, having sex for the first time, going to middle school, first day of middle school, first day of high school, first day of college if you went there, first day of a new job. Everything's scary until you do it. I think asking for more money is actually one of the easiest things to ask for because I'm comfortable with no, Liz isn't.

1:11When you ask for a higher price, if they say no, and you're understanding that you're capable of saying, okay, I'll take what you're offering, or you're able to say no, I'm sorry, I have to move on, you're good. Too many people get upset because they feel like that no is like some sort of form of validation. What about the idea of getting a no that ruins the relationship? It can't, never in the history of somebody asking for more money respectfully, empathetically, calmly, with context has that ruined? If I cut your hair for 15 years and you walked in right now and I'm, how much do you pay for your haircut?

1:5340. 40. And you walk in and I'm like, Dustin, you know what? You're a fucking motherfucker. I've been doing this for 15 years and like, you take me for granted. I'm$55 an hour, all right? Well, that can ruin the relationship. What the fuck just happened? because I've been holding it in and I didn't know how to ask and I had a bad moment just happen or I lost 10 of my clients or I saw you get a haircut on social media by somebody else but the reason you Dustin did that was it was in my video and the guy came to our room and did it and you just took it but like that triggered me fear leads to bad interactions versus Dustin you've been with me for a long time I want you to know something it's April it's April 7th right now.

2:40Starting the Monday after starting September 10th. Big shout out Sasha Vaynerchuk that's his birthday. Starting September 10th. You know I'm going to 55 bucks. I wanted to give you a lot of time. You know my hope is that you see the value in what I do but I wanted to give you enough time in case you wanted to consider going somewhere else. I really want to keep you. I need your business. If you're like hey Gary I'm sorry like my fucking boss Gary V's a real dick. He hasn't given me a raise in a while. I gotta stay at 40. Then I'm like you know what Dustin I've always really liked you. can you do me a favor?

3:08Don't tell anyone because I'll grandfather you. I may not grandfather everyone. It would undermine. That's a very different conversation. And that's the hard one. That's a current cluster. If you're 40 bucks haircut, ready, watch this. And I'm always 40 bucks for Avi, for you. Mackenzie, let's role play. Mackenzie, come in and be like, how much is your haircut? Go ahead. How much is your haircut? $50. Okay. Now, Mackenzie can be like, hey, I heard you were 40 and I can make a decision. Mackenzie could say yes. Mackenzie say, that's a little too much. I'm going to go shop somewhere else. I'm in control of my next move.

3:40Many times in my career, I've said this much. They've said no. And I'm like, okay, I'll take that. Many more times, thankfully, because I keep ascending. I say, VaynerMedia, my speaking fee, everything. I say, and they leave and I'm cool with it. And many of those times they come back and want it. And you see that at the baseball card shows at the national. If you look carefully, you'll film this year. I'll negotiate. Sometimes they walk, sometimes they come back, sometimes they don't, but it's not scary. I get that it's scary for many, but done respectfully and knowing that you can change your mind and go back and realizing their no doesn't mean that you're not good or you're good or this or that.

4:23Once you get there, you're unstoppable. And imposter syndrome must be eliminated. Webster's, I don't know if you, I assume you put it in your book, take it back out, leave it there as like, we just are going back to being insecure. People are putting makeup on big words to make it more palpable. You both know this. It's an insecure way of saying insecure. It's an insecure way to say insecure. Well said. Think about with your homies, you're like, you guys are in that age group, you're in life the last 10 years, right? Imposter syndrome, it hits so different if your friend's like, yo, I'm just insecure to ask people, what the fuck?

4:58You're getting coddled when you use imposter syndrome. You're getting pushed harder if you say insecure. every single person's gonna resonate with this right now. You tell your homies, your best friends, your parents, whoever, your boss, you say imposter syndrome, you get coddled again. You say insecure, you get pushed. Say it out right now, everybody. Take a pause. Hey, man, I'm really struggling with insecurity to ask for a raise. What the fuck, Don? Go for it. You're the fucking best. I have some real imposter syndrome to ask for a raise. Yeah, me too. It's a fucking coddle fucking circle jerk.

5:31Imposter syndrome is another word that's being used by the fucking over coddling society. I'm going to say this on the record so there's no confusion. I believe the over coddling society was well intended. I don't think they had some bad agenda. I don't think they're trying to fuck up the USA. I think it was well intended. But I also think it was delusional, driven by parents that didn't have their life in order in understanding how much entitlement, how much prosperity we have. This is why immigrants and people of less means just shit on this. They're fucking tired of hearing people that have it so good complaining.

6:14I have all sorts of people watching. The CEO of a Fortune 100 right now watching, making 38 million a year. Kid making$38 a year in a small part of the world is watching right now. And everybody in between, we're all hearing shit different. I'm trying to go to the universal truth. Whether you're making 100 ,000 a year, 4 million a year, or 4 cents a year, get other people's names out of your mouth. Stop judging people and you'll stop judging yourself. Stop judging people and you'll stop judging yourself. Stop judging people and you will stop judging yourself. You stop judging yourself, you will fucking move fast, light, happy.

6:52No pressure on the chest. That's why I sleep so well. How do you stay consistent with daily content when you're in a highly regulated industry like finance where every single piece of content has to be approved by compliance and marketing? Who's this? Doesn't say. LinkedIn though. Very easy. Because there's people that do it and get ahead of your content. Excuse City USA regulated industries. Yes, I'm aware that there's things for the SEC. And by the way, there's things for not marketing to kids. and by the way, there's things for not marketing to with alcohol. Diageo's a client. Mattel and Hasbro both have been clients.

7:34Chase and Visa are clients and big clients. I've seen it all. Excuses, your piece of content may take three days to come out or nine days to come out instead of right away because it has to go through compliance. The fuck does that have to do with making content? That means you're just on a nine day behind cycle. You make a piece of content out, comes out in nine days. I make a piece of content tomorrow, comes out in 10 days. I make two pieces of content the next day, comes out in 11 days. Sounds like if you keep doing this, you're starting your real life in nine days. Fucking excuses, y 'all.

8:05You got all sorts of excuses to me. I'm a perfectionist. I'm in a regulated industry. I'm this, I'm that. You don't want to do the work. I got excuses too. Mackenzie, I got excuses. Oh, Mike, I was out late on doing whatnot last night. It's so late. I'm traveling so much from London. I just took a long flight. I got excuses for days when it comes to being in the gym. By the way, this is why it's so easy for me to understand what people are doing at work in their career. Because I do it in the gym, I smell it on you because I got it in me too, not in this category. You saw when we were in the offsite and me and you worked out, people didn't want that heat.

8:43It was like Andy Rips, they don't want it. Right? But Rips is willing to work 19 hours a day. and others might not want that. Right? We all have discipline. Some people are disciplined eaters, working out, parents, readers, you know, like entrepreneurs and other people aren't. But I've also won in the gym in a certain way. That's why, like the gym has really mattered to me because I'm so far along compared to where I was. That means everybody here can make progress on their personal brand, on their career, on their entrepreneurial side hustle, on their actual startup, on their business. We can all get better.

9:25Every one of us. And that's staying within the walls we work in. Back to the big shit, we can all start new relationships and break up with ones that are hard. Spouse, siblings. I said this the other day. I'm not advocating for divorce. I'm saying we can be accountable. You can move to Thailand. You could. Like everything is yes. Maybe. And everyone's a no. Because they're more comfortable laying in the muck of their excuse. Second you understand that, you get happy. People don't see that. The last 25 years of parenting is the person sucks. You're like, no, you don't suck, baby. It's just, it's your boss's fault.

10:09It's your teacher's fault. It's society's fault. You got fucked. You were born in the wrong era. This Gen Z thing of like wrong era, best era. Motherfuckers are complaining that the boomers ruined it and making millions of dollars as 22-year-olds. There was zero 22-year-old millionaire self-made fucking 40 years ago. Best era. What 16-year-old could fucking grab a phone, make a video of themselves dancing, and become a multi-millionaire in three years? In 1986. Shut your mouth. You should kiss the ground the boomers lived on if you're talking about the era. separation of wealth yes inflation yes but doesn't mean you can't you can more than ever you know what really makes me throw up a lot of these like I really know a lot of shit and a lot of people there's people that make content shitting on boomers whose grandparents left them five million dollars people need to shut their fucking mouth is what really needs to happen if they're spitting poison stop being negative y 'all Oh, fuck.

11:17The only one that's losing if you spew negativity is you. With such a large team, how do you manage one-on-one meetings effectively? What do you do to ensure everyone feels heard, valued, and supported? You know, it's funny, and this is a tricky one. The real answer is you just schedule as many one-on-ones as possible. I'm sad that I can't do that for Vayner now. I really did it for those first hundred. That's how we became the culture that we became. I think the most important thing is for people to really know you're there if they need them. I would say that both of you have felt times of like needing more one-on-one time with me or at least a one-on-one time with me.

11:56But I would also argue that if I really pushed you, that you would both admit under a lie detector test that if you really needed me, if you're like, I really need 15 minutes with you, I think you both know it would be done immediately, not even in a week. Yes? Yeah, definitely. The fact that both of you could say absolutely, that's what I think is the answer to everybody. The answer to the question is you need to make everybody feel like you can be there if they need you in an emergency. And then you need to use your intuition on knowing who to talk to when. You know? Like if you feel it. And then you do things, right?

12:33You do little things. Like when you interact with people digitally, like there'll be times where I can feel a little something and I'll go out of my way of like, great job, Mackenzie. if I'm like, you know, like doing little baiting to see if they'll jump on that. Like, I don't do it to avoid the meeting. In fact, I do it to create the meeting. You know, when I give Erin a compliment on our team, as I've started to do a little bit, right? That's like, okay, she's like, okay, I'm being seen by him. If I need him, I feel now more comfortable to get him. Not, I'm doing that so I don't have to do it.

13:05I'm actually always open to do it and always open to not do it. Again, I don't want to create the fucking circle of over coddling. I want to do it when you need it. Because that creates scale and it also creates resilience and the ability to address things themselves. Other times, I mean I just told somebody that's been in the company for nine years that I was disappointed with them for not coming earlier. But they were trying to do the resilience thing. So it's all fucking balance. Balance, balance, balance, balance, balance, balance. By the way, if you want to start collecting V friends, which I recommend to all of you, the balanced beetle.

13:38Actually, I want everybody who's listening right now to stop and take the quiz. vfriends.com slash quiz. Find out which VFriend you are. I am literally building the next Marvel and Pokemon in your faces and 99 % of you that are in the middle of this video right now or the podcast literally are not collecting. It's a huge mistake, especially if you have somebody under 10. What your mom and brother have, that's what VFriends is. If you have a kid under 10, immediately collecting VFriends together because you can use the VFriends to teach them really good attributes will change your life forever because it will make you and your child closer.

14:10My sister and I are very close. We talk a lot about the fact that me and AJ have similar interests, which has allowed us to be close in a way that me and my sister is different. We have different kinship. We grew up together and we're closer in age and we're so close. But if my sister collected trading cards and was a diargetical, it's different. Similar interests matter. Finding those with your children matter for a lot of people watching right now, I really think VFriends can be that. Plus, I think VFriends is a co-parent. Like when you have to tell your kid what tenacious termite means, and you start talking.

14:45Some people never talk about tenacity. Did your parents ever talk to you about tenacity? I don't even think we knew the definition. Yep, yours? Great. I believe that if you open a pack of VFriends and your seven-year-old gets tenacious turkey, they're like, mom, what's tenacious turkey? And you talk to your kid about tenacity, that that will have a disproportionately meaningful impact on their life. in a way that I don't think most people understand. I believe gritty ghosts, tenacious term, right? Like accountable ant. This now goes into what the modern parenting needs to get back to purple, back to the middle.

15:17We don't talk about that shit. We don't talk about it and it's the thing. Resilience, grit, accountability. These will change kids' life. So I'm pumped about that. Sorry for that little VFriends commercial. But I'm telling you, you're fucking up if you're not part of VFriends. Come and join us. I know you say it's all about the individual piece of content, but I feel like my videos don't get seen by enough people to get me any traction. All my TikToks are me recapping the show Survivor, and I don't have many followers. Can you tell me how to find the success you're always talking about where someone with only a few followers gets a million views?

15:53Happens all the time. Now, a million's hard. A few 10 followers, a million views happens. Happens actually all the time, which is nuts, which is why this is the greatest seer of social media. but the answer to your question is garyvee.com slash attention if you don't have 15 bucks. And the answer is day trading attention. There is a skill to this. The end. This person clearly stinks. And that's okay. I stink at a lot of stuff too. I would argue we stink at TikTok. We're not growing. Like you have to give it love. What's my answer? My answer is I made a 44 page deck for free. Here it is. Flash it.

16:28For everybody who's listening, garyvee.com slash attention. Download it. Read it. Implement it. do it for a year and then call me back I have a funny feeling you'll have a post that does well and if you're a real leader about that life if you got 20 bucks go to Amazon and buy day trading attention I went deep on this last book it is a fucking banger let me do a break real quick we'll be right back everybody just gonna check make sure there's no fires I'm sorry to be jumping in the middle of the podcast but the truth is everybody else is getting people to review on Spotify and Apple and like the Vayner Nation does none of that if this podcast has ever meant anything to you please go to Spotify or Apple right now and leave a review.

17:05By the way, even if you give me a one-star review because you think it's shit, I respect it. But just leave a review, an actual review. Four or five stars and the actual details of why. Yeah, that would mean something for me. So thanks. Now back to the podcast. Barbara said, I am 44 years old and decided to become an author. I'm currently working on a book as a self-publisher. Part of that is creating a social media presence to reach people, but social media really can be extremely draining and time-consuming for me. The reality is I'm not really into that part of the process and instead just want to write.

17:36Do I really need to be the one to do all of that in order to be noticed? If you wanted to sell, Barbara. Now, good news, Barbara. You could be an author that is one in a million that just wrote such a book that it went viral by itself. Good news, Barbara. You could take money you have, if you have any. I don't know if you do. And you can hire someone to do the social media for the book. It just depends on what you want, my friends. Like, I didn't make up the rules. Like, I just hope everybody understands that. I didn't make up the rules that the way the world works is like people need to know about something to consider it to buy it.

18:16I didn't make up the rules that distribution changes. Like, yes, Barbara, in 1967, you might have wrote a book. A, you wouldn't be able to self-publish in 1967 without the internet. Barbara. B, let's just play a fantasy world, that you could. Yes, and a bookstore owner that was prominent might put you at the front of the table and hand sell it because they liked the book, just like I did for wines. There are many wines that I, Gary Vaynerchuk, there's one, Boudreaux, I think it's Boudreaux. There was one Washington State high-end wine that I just happened to buy, that I just happened to luckily walk down the aisle at Wine Library and grab and put on the table that I opened and my palette just happened to think it was remarkable.

19:05I freaked out, looked in the back of the label, told everybody what the address or email or phone number was, linked it into my Wine Library TV post and sent hundreds of people, thousands of people to the mailing list and now it's sold when it didn't before. That happens. Luck is life. You don't have to do shit, Barbara. But you're self-publishing which means you're self-selling. If you want people to read it, if you'd like it to be commercially successful, yes, you have to market. But by the way, you don't have to do social media. Go do 50 podcasts. But who the fuck wants you on without social media?

19:48People confused out here. Barbara, can I ask you something? I'd like to look like an Adonis without eating well and exercising like a freak. Possible? She can say yes, steroids, implants, Ozempic. Sounds expensive. Yale says, Yale. Yale, any advice for someone going into a new work field at 30? To realize you don't need any advice. 30? You're a fucking kid. Honestly, 30 and 22 is the same exact thing. You know, don't compare. Don't say I wish I started, like here's a good one. You start at Yale, starts at 30. A couple weeks in, she's like, I'm fucking loving this. We've had that happen at Vayner.

20:39We were very weird because of our residency program. We have a lot of people come in at like 29 and some of them will meet with me one-on-one and they're like, I wish I came in with all these 20-year-olds. I'm like, why? It's me. Right, right, right. I was in my 20s when I started. You started what? I was like 29 or something. When you came to Vayner? Yeah. Right. I'm sure it might have, you're a human. I'm sure it might have run through your mind, especially if you decided, I mean, you've obviously been here a little while, it's going well, like, you might have been like, damn, I should have done this at 20.

21:08But what? What is I should have or I wish? Poisonous. Sentence starters. I should have, I wish that. Like, so let's play out the scenario. Here's my advice. You're 30, you walk in, you love it. You found your place, which happens to a lot of people. You know yourself better at 30 than you do at 22. 18. Promise me, Yale, that you won't be like, I wish I did this or I should have done this at 22. Be grateful, be humble. Yes, what are you worried about? Starting behind? If you're talented, in a year, you might be past people that have been there for seven years. There have been people in our company that have started at 20.

21:45McKenzie, you're one of those people. I don't look very far. You can sit right here. 28, you come in a year later, you're more advanced than people that have been at the company for five years. Sounds like you're at the same place. So, don't cry. Next, like about what could've. That's another one. What could've. I should've. I wish. There's just, it is. Accept it. Swallow the pill of reality. It's good fucking medicine. It's a lot better than this dwelling potion you all fucking drink every morning. I like that. The pills of reality are more delicious than the potions of delusion. I like that.

22:31We need to make that as a picture card. And then clip this. When you swallow reality pills, they're yummy. When you drink delusional potion, it's sending you down a bad path. Now the other version. D.L. walks in, and a month in, it's a disaster. She's like, what the fuck was I thinking about medical field? I'm scared of blood, what the fuck was I thinking? Don't beat yourself up, good news. Let's say you walk in and it's a disaster shit show. You're just gonna text me, DM me next year, and say, any advice for somebody starting in a new field at 31? And I'm gonna give the same advice. At 33, at 37, the pills of reality are delicious.

23:15They're like those old Flintstones vitamins. They tricked you into taking that shit even though it was probably bad for you. That's why it tasted so good. You said in the closet once you eat them all. You did? You did? Because they were candy. They were a little fucked up. They were like chalk but like, oh, McKen's. It's all the same shit, you know that, right? Like I said earlier, it's only two things. Optimism, pessimism, good, bad, light, dark, hope, fear. and there's the same cliche 13 things underneath mom dad siblings bosses you know and now a new one public persona right we're all learning that that's what got everybody on tilt all this anxiety was always there but now people that were trying to impress everybody in their family and neighborhood now they got to impress everybody in the world got it the scale got heavier but it's the same I love how everyone was like, it's all fucked up now.

24:11I'm like, everybody was an alcoholic in the 60s. What are we talking about? We didn't talk about these feelings back then. We got better, we're better. But everybody thinks it's worse because we talk about everything. It's better. If you're watching or listening, you pick the single best time to ever be alive. But mainstream media is not going to make you think that. And then the people on social media amplifying mainstream media are not going to make you think that. But guess what? I'm gonna make you think that and I'm right here and I'm social media. Dust. Go put it on the fucking television.

24:42Go open the newspaper. Show me the positivity. Because I'm right here at GaryVee and I'm not the only one. So ironically social media's got a lot more positivity optimism, practicality than television but people want to blame it because that's a narrative that mainstream media wants to take. Those motherfuckers are pushing poison. I got no time for them. I got no time. I turn those on to know everything. But I don't let those motherfuckers penetrate me. Those fucking insecure pushers, poison pushers, negativity pushers. Negativity is fucking everybody up. Cut negativity out of your life. Television, social media, mommy, daddy, toxic voice, boss, excuse me, anybody, everybody.

25:32Cut, limit, cut, limit, cut, limit. Cut when it doesn't matter? Random friend, cut. Limit when it's mommy. I don't advocate for fully cutting out toxic mom. I advocate for limiting it and putting pressure on her. Mom, we gotta go to therapy together. What are you talking about? That. What about people that do cut off their mom too easily? Do you think that's like too extreme? I don't know if it's too extreme. it usually means that they have the same traits. Means they're struggling with the empathy and compassion they're seeking. In your experience, what's the number one thing that holds people back from progressing within a company?

26:18And what feedback do you give someone in your own company that's being held back because of this? That's a great question. Many things hold back people from growing in a company. Number one, things that have nothing to do with them. Timing. It's about to happen if we go into this recession. like if companies are shrinking there's no growth on top of that i've seen internal memos from major companies saying you cannot add for raises or headcount without showing us your ai plan so moments in time that's number one and then the human has to be self-aware to know that that's what's going on they got to bunker down you know what i mean number two uh lack of self-awareness which would hurt them on number one, knowing what's going on.