Liverpool’s Salah problem, the moment Ronaldo clicked and Becks’s candles | The Good, The Bad & The Football

28:05So he was officially free.

28:08Paddy McGuinness:So I got a phone call. My phone goes, and the only time my phone ever rings when it says with L number is the Mike Sir Alex. So my phone goes, I'm thinking, whoa, he's coming back in for me here. I'm going back to United. So I'm like, hello? And you always know, in the mind on the phone, he always goes, and you think, you rewind back to getting bollocks what have I done where was the last night what did I do last night and he goes how are you doing and he's like he's going around the hours and thinking come on get to it tell me you want me to come back tell me you want me to come back he went talked to him about Michael Owen I thought for fuck's sake he's like oh no so I was saying what do you mean he said he's still got what it takes I said yeah he's unbelievable finish you he's not obviously got the legs of Utah but no brainer he's out of contract he'll score you goals so then I rang Michael and said to Michael just get on your phone he said why I said oh so I'm just going to ring you up I think he wants you he was like right I will right I will so I was a part of the chat we're talking about chats that was part of the chat I had with Michael going back to Man United going back as well to people burst onto the scene talk about ruining Ronaldo but we saw did you play in the game of Sporting Lisbon when we first saw him it was fucking ridiculous who did he absolutely ruin?

29:24Shayser Shayser absolutely destroyed him

29:28Paddy McGuinness:Shady got off Shady's not recovering from that Shady's not recovering from that We didn't fly from Chicago 20 years ago It was horrific wasn't it We flew about Jet lag We flew about 14 hours Went to this hotel Had something to eat Got back on the bus Didn't have a sleep Got back on the bus And went to play his game But I think it would have ruined him If he had the best preparation ever I had a defining moment for Cristiano We were playing AC Milan in the Champions League And he was playing against Maldina Yeah The fucking best ever Yeah and he was still very young he was lucky might have been his first season I can't remember but it took him a little time to get used to it he played against Maldini and Gattuso I remember Gattuso the little fucking midfield player he just kept running over to that side and taking the ball off him and I know I'm saying like it wasn't a standout performance but I think from that day he learnt that at some point he's going to have to pass the ball he thought I'm just going to take the ball I'm going to go past everybody.

30:27Wait a minute, it's Maldina. And they know how good you are. So Gattuso keeps sprinting over. So Gattuso keeps sprinting over. Just pass it. But he didn't do it. He wanted to do something different. He needed to show everyone how good he was. That's kind of a little bit of the sort of, that youth in it, the ignorance of youth. Remember when he first came?

30:47Paddy McGuinness:He was such a funny lad. Such a great lad, great kid. It was him and Eric Jember Jember together, weren't they? And they were like comedists. It was like Max and Paddy. they were like they were like Matt Maynard they were funnier alright sorry about saying you were late this morning a bit of a grudge no, Cristiano was good when he impressions he used to do Phil Neville's walking he was a comedian honestly I remember when he signed for United I watched him in a game and he like again million step overs when you've got players like you around and Roy Keane do you sort of go to him stop that when he takes it in the right way yeah he got told of all of us especially a big thing when he first came was he was diving yeah he was diving people are nowhere near him he's fucking going over really do you know we'd seen over the years we don't we don't like that type of stuff English no we just don't do it no I don't like it I hate it and even when we're looking and thinking fucking hell come on Cristiano just get up I think at the time a lot of us we've just gone over and picked him up it's part of the play though in Europe isn't it it's considered like of thing they do.

31:54Paddy McGuinness:It's just cultured it and that's what he was brought up doing so it takes a while to change it but yeah he got to obviously he got to stop doing it and then became the genius of coming. It's amazing isn't it like still at it no. That's ridiculous. As fit as a fiddle when you even back then when you see him as a young player and I know it's easy looking back and going and telling your sons this is what he did this is what he did he literally was the last one out of training all the time he just trained in the gym he was a young lad living on his own he didn't go home anywhere he just trained there do the gym always playing table tennis for some bizarre reason and was just obsessed with the training ground so you can see how he ended up I never thought he'd get to what he wanted to it's not a fluke no he was his life was everything towards football what I hear about him no it's still the same even though he's got all the money and the fame gyms at his house it's just recovery hydro pools when's he going to stop playing is he 40 now he's 40 now how old can you go on for possibly the game where he took shares his soul when you were in the changers after when you were in the changers after was it as quick as that where Sir Alex went we were sat on the bus we was on the bus weren't we after the game after the game going this is a fucking joke we've been on planes, trains and arm mobiles for two days basically.

33:25Paddy McGuinness:Yeah. Just wanted to get home, we're knackered. Come on. I mean, I don't think anyone knew what was going to happen because David Gill wasn't on the bus. So Alex wasn't on the bus. It's getting to like 90 minutes, sat on the bus and then the real person out of the shouting, what the, what's going on here? We need to go, we're going to go home. Anyway, the manager's come back on and said, sign Ronaldo, signed him. That's how, that was how quick it was. It was bizarre. Yeah. I don't think the manager was going to leave that. I think it's well documented and I think he said it enough times. Mind you, he wasn't leaving that training ground without that signature.

33:56I'm trying to think of when that's happened. It would never have happened, I don't think. In football, as quick as that, seeing someone.

34:03Paddy McGuinness:I don't think nowadays, with our football clubs, we run with sporting directors and all the recruitment and all that, I don't think any... I wouldn't imagine maybe Pep would be liable to go and say, I want that guy. I've just used my eyes for the last couple of hours. I want that player. I think the plan originally was he was going to stay there He was going to stay there for a year, wasn't he? He was going to stay at Sporting Lisbon for a year, but he was that good. Buying him out, though, back then, when we're talking about it's not a lot of money and all the rest of it, it probably weren't mega, mega money, were it back then?

34:31No. £12 million, wasn't it? Yeah, something like that. £12 million, yeah. Right. £12 million. Right, I just want to talk a little bit about, before we get back onto Premier League, England. So, Bellingham, Fordham, Grealish, all out the squad. What were your thoughts on that, firstly? Adam Wharton's been left out as well. Wharton? That was the one for me. He's played the same squad as last time. Do you think he's going, I know I'm going to take him, so I'm just going to try something else out. But surely you'd want to play him, wouldn't you? I think with the three lads you spoke about,

35:06Paddy McGuinness:Grealish, Foden and Bellingham, I think that might be the case for them because he knows about that. But I think Wharton's not been in that many squads. As if, correct me if I'm wrong, he's not been in a lot of squads. So you'd keep, I personally would keep him in the squad and get to know him even better. I think with the other three lads, I think they'll definitely be going. There's no way he's not going to attack them. Foden, Bellingham, Grealish maybe 50-50, but the way he's playing, he should definitely be going. And the other two, they'll go. I can see wise on it, because the three of them probably haven't performed for him when they've played for England.

35:37Bellingham's just off the back of an injury. Yeah, but he wasn't great when he... I think he had a bit of a spot as well, I didn't know how he said something in the media. And they played really well. but it was so big to beat, wasn't it? They were brilliant, to be fair. So that's probably why he's doing that, but I don't think he should be. I think if you look at the squad England have picked, no, that's not going to win the World Cup. Now, look, even with them three in it, still might be a little bit of a mountain to climb, but them three in it make the squad better. Them three have to be in it.

36:07And do you know what? He hasn't got that many games to get them together. Up until the World Cup, they've probably got November, if they've got March and then all of a sudden they wake up I think they should they need to be Warton's the biggest edge scratcher for me because like Butty said then those three plays you kind of go looks like they're going to be going regardless but Warton you want to be playing him you know Paddy they're fit they should be in the squad now Beningham's played the last couple of weeks for Real Madrid Phil Foden it looks like he's got himself back Jack Grealish looks like he's back to his body so why do you think

36:39Paddy McGuinness:the reasoning is do you know what gets me sorry all the chat years him and we played all the chat years was why don't they play the people that are on form for the club because you'd always get the same players playing for England whether or not they play well for the club he seems to have flipped that and go well they're not playing well for me I don't care what they're doing in the club kit if you look at Foden and Grealish they've been unbelievable for their clubs this season they should be in that Billingham obviously had a couple of injuries and coming back from a long injury I don't really know that one but certainly Grealish and Foden for their clubs have been phenomenal so I don't know what he's thinking it's a total difference to what every other England manager has done everyone Gareth South all of them go Paul Scholes has always done it for me I don't care what he's doing in the club he's always performed for me in an England kit that's why Pickford always got picked he's always been brilliant in competitions and tournaments for England and Tuchel seems to have flipped that now I'm going well they've not played that great for me I don't care what they're doing for City or Everton with them two lads they are England's three best players I'm baffled by it.

37:46But that's his choice. Just on a little bit of a tangent, I always hear ex-players talking about they've done the badges, right? What happens when you go to do your badges? Like, you know, when you're at school, you do your swimming badges, you get your bronze for picking the black brick up off the bottom of the pool and all that. So you get there, day one, what happens?

38:06Paddy McGuinness:We started ours, our B licence, when we was about 24, 25, just moved to Carrington it's because we have too much time on your hands and you get into a bit of we could get into a bit of my other going to town and doing everything you shouldn't be doing and so basically the manager got us all through it was me, Skolzy Olly Gunner Keeney I didn't do it did you not do it you just do what you want don't you I just didn't want to do it I did mine when I retired Olly Gunner Keeney Nev Phil Giggs we all did it at the Carrington and after that you then go well it's not that hard it's quite easy let's do the A licence so we did the A licence then the Pro licence it's really bizarre and no one thinks that you know no one thinks I don't think I'm better than anybody we're quite humble I'm not better than anybody I just my job's my job your job's yours theirs theirs and that's it but I find it really weird when you go on your coaching budget it's not it's not like people that have got a little bit of expertise should go on one course and other people should go on another one if I'm going to go and try and learn to drive an F1 car I'm not learning with Lewis Hamilton I'm learning with learners and the FA I believe I don't know if it's changed now, but at the time, you're just with people that are postmen and lollipop ladies.

39:17Paddy McGuinness:So anyone can apply for it. Anyone can apply and go into that. It costs a few quid as well. It costs a few quid. It's the most bizarre. So you've got Paul Scholes or Steven Gerrard. It might be a bit different now, but back then it was weird. You sat with a postman, lollipop ladies. You've got a Paul Scholes on the course, and it could be a P. McGuinness at the side of him giving it, I'm giving this a go. And that's it. And maybe that's right. I don't know if that's right or wrong, but it's like, I think you've got to have played Mourinho never played no no goalkeeper yeah but I did mine you know when you said you Roy guys I didn't want to do it and I did mine later I was about 34 35 but I did mine I think with some of the younger players like well I said younger players they were getting older than the likes of Rio John O'Shea Wayne Rooney and a lot of it's classroom stuff and it's painful honestly it's painful I remember the first one we did Wayne Rooney came he was going to do it the full course he sits at the front desk he was like a swatter at school he was unbelievable he's writing notes down he's asking questions every two minutes you know you're talking before you shut the fuck up I want to go fucking wazzle still asking questions didn't turn up again didn't turn up fucking game once that was it didn't see him again I thought my air licence one my air licence one was at it was for St George's part was built so mine was at Redding in a hotel in Redhill I swear to god it was like a stag do it was ten days of Every night, I'm lying in my bed, cover's shaking, going, I don't want to go down there.

40:43Paddy McGuinness:I don't want to go down there. It was like a 10-day stag do. It was horrendous. You've got all that's front post office on it. It's a bizarre thing. Who was on your A-license course now? Is there any of them who are managers now? Was on... He was... J-Moll, no. Yeah, no J-Moll. No, my pro-license. I was going to say with that J-Moll fellow. My pro-license was really good. It was... You have a group of four. Mine was Graham Potter. What's it called? The Dortmund manager. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. I can't remember his name come on he's not there anymore is he? Dortmund yes Terzic Edin Terzic so Graham Potter Edin Terzic it's me and another guy and by the way you know you see that people get what they deserve in life them two are by far the best on the course they were unbelievable but it was all not so much Graham but certainly Edin was all analytical way of coaching but they were both phenomenal I remember sitting watching them I think was it the semi-final of the European Champions League.

41:40Paddy McGuinness:Dortmund, yeah. Dortmund, Chelsea. They were both managers of the club and you're thinking that's why the managers are both of the Champions League and the finalists because they're both were very, very good at it. It's funny, isn't it, when obviously he's just lost his job recently, Annie Potter, and the fans are like, terrible, worst manager. Phenomenal. Yeah, that's what I mean. Everyone in football speaks highly of him. But it's different when you go on the ground and you've got to learn. Management for me is not just obviously knowing what you're doing on a computer and it's how you deal with human beings I think I think that's the biggest in my experience over my career that's what they can't teach on them courses is you can't teach on them courses how to know how to teach a human being because you're not a car you don't put petrol and just turn it on it goes you have to coax them into your way thinking get them on your the same ship if you like and go in the right direction that you believe in that's the secret to it they give you rather hypotheticals don't they what could happen if a player's not happy but really it's not real until you get to someone knocking on your door Imagine he can go out and eyeball the best two coaches to bring with him and they can do all that stuff.

42:42Paddy McGuinness:He has got to manage 24, nowadays anyway, 24 millionaires who've all got egos, who all want to be superstars. That is very, very difficult. Yeah, and I feel as though in the modern game, the players know that. Yeah. With managers, they know kind of going, well, I'll be here, you'll be gone. Exactly. That never happened when they were saying it, I can imagine at other clubs, people are like, fuck it, I'm not bothering this weekend. He's going anyway. I can imagine that happening all the time. Controversial on this, I think if you're a football manager, there's two accents that no matter what you're doing as a job, fans aren't having.

43:25And it's mad. I think Australian, I think that's what goes against Angelot, is accent and American. something about Premier League football when you see an American manager and an Australian manager it's so alien yeah and I think they get like people are on them straight away it's because football is not their sport though is it do you know what I mean yeah America especially where's soccer in America who's the lad who's the lad who's the lad who's the lad Leeds the manager Marsh Jesse Marsh yeah

43:56Paddy McGuinness:Jesse Marsh yeah we got the ball in the goal I was just going to say I've got a show call Ted Lasso I've never seen it I've been told I am going to watch it That's what you expect of an American manager He's brilliant to watch it, it's hilarious It just doesn't seem right does it I think with Ange, an Australian He's a bit dour I think that's why it comes across like that I don't think it's his accent It's totally wrong that people have that It's just It's like a bit of a weird It's like one of us going working for a basketball team, managing basketball. It's not our sport. It's not what you know.

44:37Paddy McGuinness:Obviously, they do know the sport. I'm not saying they don't, but it's just weird. It's not natural, is it? It doesn't seem natural. It is a funny one, isn't it? I think the prime accent for a football manager, Scottish. Yeah, because they've had so many good ones, haven't they? Yeah, but it's just, when they talk to you all, do they? Get the fucking ball! It's aggressive accent. It's a soon-ass as well. They've just fucking got authority, haven't they? Just look hard. I'm putting Scottish as the number one football manager accent. Spanish. Pep. Enrique. No? All right, then. No, no. Rafa Benitez.

45:17I'm going to go English second. English. Dutch as well. I think Dutch have got a bit, haven't they? Yeah, Spanish. Yeah, I think Portuguese is a bit low down. Mourinho, not that the great manager, but I just think for that, when you hear the voice shout at you on the pitch and you're like, Jesus. Yeah. You've got Alex Ferguson. That's scary. Yeah, that's not me. I'm scared.

45:42Paddy McGuinness:It is an aggressive accent as well, isn't it? Yeah. It's aggressive. But with Ange, again, when you're watching the news and the games and the results, and it is early in the season, seven games have been played so far. He's lost his first five games, hasn't he? Is that right? But when you look at, obviously they've got an erratic owner, and he's loved that owner, by the way, by the Forest fans, but were there, I think, as an appointment, the fans weren't really infused by him. Also, as well, you look at Amourin at United, who can't get sacked. I mean, he's trying his best. He's trying his best.

46:22He can't get sacked. It's impossible. Shy of him walking into centric pitch and having a shit. I think he can't do anything else now. He's tried his damnedest. He's gone, right, I'll give up. I might as well start winning some games. But to be talking for a manager to be sacked after seven games, I know he's lost his first five, is it? He'll lose them all. I think he's lost five games. I know he's not won any of them. They're not playing terribly, though, are they? I watched them in a European game against Bettis away. and for 20 minutes I thought they were brilliant yeah just sometimes it just takes that little bit of something a little bit of luck to get a result now look yesterday going to Newcastle if you ever want to go to a place that did the result Newcastle isn't the place no I think it's seven games

47:13Paddy McGuinness:and not all got a result for seven games not one in seven games is that enough to justify sacking someone no well it shouldn't be but with this owner he knows what he's going to get if he goes seven games out if he got sacked today I don't think anyone was surprised just because of the man who's in charge of the football club really Nuno should never have been sacked should he? no well that was a weird one because he came out in that interview didn't he? out of nowhere and went well you know you talk about asking for the sack he asked for the sack he asked for the sack though didn't he? with that in mind I saw an interview with Ange about a week or so no no I'm just don't like his accent no no no I'm not saying that I'm saying For all your Australian fans out there, me and Scorch, listen, this morning I'll give you a prime example of the accents thing.

48:04This morning, right, as you know, I'm doing this training regime and I thought, right, I'll do myself some healthy scrambled eggs. Opened up the egg box, all the eggs, white. Put me on the wrong foot. An egg should be like this colour. It should, do you know what I mean? Brown. It tasted exactly the same as any other egg, but it just put me on the wrong... I went, white eggs? This is a bit weird, because they should be a tan colouring egg. And that's my point. So when you see an Australian manager or an American manager, you're going, yeah, they're doing the business, but it just doesn't seem right.

48:41No, you're right.

48:42Paddy McGuinness:If you look at the films, all the football films, like Mike Bassett and all, they're not American, are they? Apart from Ted Lasso. Ted Lasso is obviously the one. Have you seen the character that's supposed to be, Roy and Ted Lasso. Yeah, it's funny, isn't it? Oh, fucking brilliant. You've not seen it, have you? No, I've seen a character called Roy Kent. And it's obviously being Roy. Yeah, it's aggressive as fuck. Brilliant. Have you spoken to Roy about that? No. No. Have you? No, I haven't. He's not seen it, has he? Has he not seen it? No, he's not seen it. But he's like him. Roy Kent. Roy Kent.

49:14He looks a bit... Darker. I'm not seeing it. Is there any other players in it

49:19Paddy McGuinness:who are supposed to be other players? One is supposed to be like Beck's in it. Yeah. I don't know his name. He's like the superstar. The superstar, the nice deals and stuff. Who else is there? I can't remember. I don't know. I'll tell you what, when I was at Newcastle, they filmed, remember Goal? Yeah. They filmed Goal at Newcastle. Remember he had the Newcastle kit and all that? And I'm like thinking, we're getting battered every week here. We're trying to train and all these fucking... And the lad who did it, who was the star of the goal... Was he a Spanish lad or something? Yeah, I swear to God.

49:46Paddy McGuinness:I was thinking, surely God there's got to be an actor out there that can at least kick a football. He couldn't kick a football. He had to get coached. I was just kick a football for about three weeks. And then he'd join in under the box. And he'd go in. Is he playing for you at the time? It's madness. He got a game. It's madness. But yeah, they filmed the goal up there. I remember Brian Robson in summer. What was Brian Robson in? He was in Jossie Giants. Jossie Giants, yeah. I used to, it's funny when you see footballers make them little cameos. Do you not remember Graham Souness in Boys from the Black Stuff?

50:18No. Do you remember Boys from the Black Stuff? of Yossi Hughes. And he looked like Graham Souness. And that was the scene in the bar. He goes, I look like you. What's he from? Fuck off. What was that accent? I am getting this Ange pointing if it fucking kills me. Go on then. About a week or so back, he does an interview where you were just saying about the talks that go on behind the scenes weeks and weeks before. He said at Spurs, he knew I think three or four months before that he were getting sacked he knew that is that how long a manager gets told or gets given a little bit of inclination I don't think they're told

51:04Paddy McGuinness:I think they just get a bit of a sick sense I think it's like what's happened the other day with Man United beating something that's not going to say the guy's job that's gives him a bit of breathing space for a few weeks that's it because if Man United get beat the next game or the next game after that it all ramps up again and I think I just think after a few a good few bad results and a bit of bad press you're right on the wall because you're not going to win every game even watching Amarim now and him speaking you feel like he's in that period now where you're thinking yeah this could go at any time he's gone I noticed it with A &O far too much Urgel he's gone his head's gone he's like just everything about Zadina's tracksuit as well yeah Zadina's tracksuit yeah it looks well in the old track I've got to say United even though they're having an absolute shocker it looks well the kit it looks well You dress well, don't you, United lads?

51:50Very nice. Going back to England, when we're talking about Wharton not getting the call, how far in advance do you get the call? I read this, actually. I read that. We never knew until the squad was announced publicly. No way. I've never ever had a phone call from an England manager. I've never had a phone call. Never. What? When I'm in my debut, I think that's where Alex said you were the squad. Yeah, they might ring the manager and he'll bring you in the day before and say you've been pit for England. But other than that, absolutely nothing. So you're sat at home with a cup of tea watching Sky Sports or whatever and you see your name in that England squad and you're going, Jesus, I'm playing.

52:31Yeah, it's the first time you know. I can't get me head around that, honestly.

52:35Paddy McGuinness:And that's why they always talk about why do you turn up with bin bags? Because nine times out of ten you've gone to, let's say, London on the Saturday morning and you're playing Arsenal on a Sunday and you'd see it on the Dicta board because it's not as early as it is now. It was like two or three days before the games, wasn't it? Or sorry, before the meet-ups. So you just get your kit man, Albert put your boots in a black bin bag, your shin-pagged boots and all that, and you'd have it over your shoulder. You wouldn't be turning up with your Louvertine suit carriers and all that kind of stuff.

53:05Paddy McGuinness:But I'll tell you a funny story about me and Scolsey. Two ginger-haired Mancunian lads. We played Arsenal on a Sunday and we were meeting up for England on the Monday. so we've got we'll stay down scores I think we beat Arsenal I think when Roy scored two goes in the black kit and we beat Arsenal so it reminds me of letting us stay down there so we said right come on let's go and have a look at the bright lights of London let's see what all this is about we were probably 22 21, 22 something like that don't go to the D &G shop no so we're like so we're like right we froze a little bit because we was like where we used to go out there was two, three pubs that's about it a couple in Manchester where did we go here we went to Cafe de Paris remember I've been there so the first thing is we went to a restaurant underneath what was the name of the restaurant called I can't remember it's like Sturz down to the square yeah so we go in and I remember we didn't book a table so we're like what are we going to do here so I've looked over this lad here and he's got one of these like iPad things obviously we're an iPad but a touch screen thing so I said oh a table for McGuinness because I see McGuinness written on there oh yeah we went in that really posh restaurant so you took someone he's leading over the council looking at the names I'm going like that.

54:16Paddy McGuinness:Yeah, table for McGuinness. And he's gone, oh, here you are, sir. Certainly, sir, we've got you here. Next minute, we see a lot of people coming in. That's their table, like, pointing at them. So we're eating this food. Two scallops from Manchester. Wasn't Nev with us as well? No, someone else. I can't remember that. I don't think it was Gaz. And then upstairs, there's Caffey de Paris. We got a bit fortunate because there was a Man United fan on the door there. So he goes, hi, lads. And we're like, honestly, we are just completely naive as anything. we walk into this big night club in London and we get on his table and we're just like I'm like star spotting I'm like there's like Chris Evans in there Danny Baker this guy texts us around this night club remember the dungeon cave downstairs with all like jacuzzi oh my god is the shooting this where the fucking knocking is I'm thinking this is not the Royal Oaken Garden this is not it's Cafe de Paris but we ended up this guy comes over and said that's my table and he was a sheik remember he was a sheik honestly I'm thinking but to be fair the guy's gone no they're having this table these lads and that was my first time hang on a minute they're all walking around with bottles of champagne can I just can I just say something here he's lent over and seen a name so he's picked Sheikh Mohammed no no no Bin Mohammed Bin who else and he's gone that's us that was a different place that was a different place that was a different one you're not fucking wrestling paddy that was a restaurant that was a restaurant yeah luckily I had a Man United fan that he looked after and got his table and like kept it for us but it was like an eye opener isn't it funny like when you're from north of England and brought up how we were all brought up like that like I was saying about that shop in Bond Street when you first go up London you do think fucking hell it's like what is going on here like it was open till back then it was Manchester was probably open till one o 'clock it was open till four o 'clock it used to amaze me London like two in the morning traffic be like Saturday afternoon in Manchester I never realised until then because I never really had it in London how many Man United fans are in London come on you must know you fucking must know that now but then it's like they know you they know you it was like 2021 it was a good night mate wasn't it even now though There's Teddy in there as well.

56:39Paddy McGuinness:Teddy might have been there or somebody else. Even now when I go to London, I've been going back and forwards to London for 20 odd years. But even now when I go there, I'm like going, there's that many players, that many things. I'm like, where the fuck do you go? Yeah, you just don't know where to play. You don't know where to play. You know everything, don't you? You know it, yeah. It's so big. I don't have a clue where to go. Just ring Bex up. Bex need a table somewhere. Do you know who my man is for tables in London? Jamie Redknapp. I ring him up. I could do with going that Zoom. Jamie, don't you worry.

57:07I love that he's a top, top lad, Jamie. I love that he is very well connected when it comes to restaurants in London. What goes on at the England training camps after you finish training? It's the most boring week of your life. It's hard, isn't it?

57:23Paddy McGuinness:No, it's all you're dreaming about is playing for your country. Yeah. It's difficult. The training, the playing is like second to none, it's the best thing you'll do, but like Scully said, bang your head against the wall. You're cooked up in a hotel room. Are you watching the other games, though, while you're in there? When there's a World Cup? Yeah. That's all you do. You have a cinema room set up. We have a couple of lads who are the bookies. Yeah. So you can have a bet, first goal. Probably shouldn't say, probably weren't allowed to, were we? But we used to do all that results and first goals.

57:53It's been done for that one before, haven't we? Results and first goals and all that stuff. And that got you through it a little bit. Yeah. But me and Nicky, we used to play pool. Pool. We've said this before, three weeks in Japan. Japan. what we did was play Pearl for three weeks how do you go on then when you're in them England training camps and like you say there's a lot of downtime you're bored to tears how does someone like like a you know like a Beckham who's a megastar are they just do they go off and do other things are they doing you can't do anything you can't go out

58:22Paddy McGuinness:we went remember Burnham Beaches Burnham Beaches downstairs in the dungeon we used to go down I must have had 50 I mean when you're playing spend a lot of time in dungeons you two don't get so fucking what's going on when you're playing football when you're playing for England I'm telling you now when you get to the game that's why it was always crap when you get to the games you've got to be near enough half a stone over your normal weight because all you do is eat because you have three meals a day and the food's fantastic you have a chef there it's phenomenal then you go up down and play snooker and you're bored so you'd have scones and cream remember the scones scones scones and cream international world cup and then you'd like you'd just like shake it is a skill and like you can understand why we'll be getting slagged off this going on cap can you believe they're moaning doing that it's not moaning we know how to look at that that dungeon was horrible wasn't it it's like no windows we used to go down there for hours almost like a dungeon we used to get the lads to sneak us stuff in he used to bring us scones and jams and sandwiches honestly I think football fans would be so surprised again when you look at elite sport even that not knowing you're in the squad until it's announced on the news.

59:35I think football, especially towards the middle of our career

59:41Paddy McGuinness:when all the sports science came in, so I'm talking like 22, 23, playing for England and stuff like that. It did change then because it was like, well, you can't go out. Other sports, the centre go out and have a bit of freedom. The Olympians go and do a towel. We were never allowed to do it. I think it's a part of your skills. So my lad plays football now and I'm like, he goes away for a night. He's like, I'm just sat in there. I said, that is one of the biggest skills you have as a footballer is learn how to use downtime because you're going to get a hell of a lot of it. And again, very lucky and very fortunate that we do, but managing your downtime I think is up there.

1:00:17Paddy McGuinness:One of the biggest skills of being a footballer you need to understand what to do in the afternoon because it's very easy to get into trouble. It's very different now though, isn't it? You say there's facilities there are now, but we had like a shitty hotel, you know what I mean? With a shitty old snooker table. Even in a good hotel, you're still confined to your little dorm, your little house and then your little fun room, like your cinema room away. I suppose they have Netflix and stuff now. We've never had stuff like that. You can't get away with it, I suppose. Yeah, see, for me, when you look at England, I'd think if they had something on for you all and you were doing stuff, it just makes the team better.

1:00:48I think that's what happens now. We had a night out for a go for a meal or something. That's what Gareth Southgate kind of did. You know, we had them all at the darts and all that, didn't we? Yeah. It's just better. How did you go on with someone like Sir Alex when you were on international duty? Was he never keen on you doing it? He was never that keen on the English lads doing it, I don't think. He had a little bit of summit against England. Unusual that for a Scottish geezer. There were always... There were different games, obviously, the qualifiers, and yeah, great, not a problem, he understands you've got to go.

1:01:22But he always wanted his players fresh and fit for Man United, which you would want, of course you would. And there were times when you had to embellish, let's say, an injury. Good word, that. What does that mean? I like that. Allegedly. Accurate an injury that wasn't really there. And I had to do it a couple of times, actually. The trouble was... Was that like if it was just a friendlier summer? Yeah, just a friendly, mainly. If you remember, we used to go sometimes just on a Sunday till Wednesday. Now they're all 10-day trips.

1:01:55Paddy McGuinness:But going back to the manager, you can understand why he did it, because it wasn't just a case of one or two of you going. It was pretty much 80 % of his squad was... I never realised that. Did you ever pretend you had an injury? No. Oh, I saw that in his eyes. Oh, I saw that. You didn't pick up on that, podcasters. No. I saw it. Did you? Yeah. Get the fucking polygraph in here. Did you? Yeah. When? I don't know. I think it was one of them friendly games with Glenn Hoddle. but I was scared though because there was nothing wrong I think he had to set a tight arm string he didn't really do scans and stuff so you could half get away with it the back's the one that's in any job the old back's gone but it was a time when he was asking people to go and see Eileen Eileen Drury oh that was all the she's going to find out she's going to suss me out afterlife thing Eileen's going to suss me out Ray Parler's one Ray Parler's one what was that he went in it was at Toppy Chris one wasn't it didn't he say can I have a short back and sides oh yeah he sat down and when you start touching your head for that he's gone can I give a short back and sides please he didn't go in the squad again that was his last that was his last I honestly it's mad you said that because I have totally wiped that from my memory that was I think the maddest thing I've seen in football and I've seen some fucking mad shit but you know he really believed it though he believed it yeah yeah but bringing her in with the team to talk to them and stuff I never actually saw the woman.

1:03:22Paddy McGuinness:We had time slots in La Manga. I remember that. Did you not go into it? I never went into it. You turned into it. I've got to say, for any younger people watching this or listening to it, so back in the day when Glenn Orwell was our England manager, he had a psychic called Eileen who was integral to the England team. It was the maddest thing ever. She was a faith hero. It's like having fucking Mystic Meg on the bench. essentially. Well, the young ones are going to know who that is, aren't they? I'm trying to think. They've all got Russell Grant, Claire, what's she called? Claire Rainer. Claire Rainer, yeah.

1:04:02Claire Rainer, that was another one. You used to love me horoscopes back in the day. Clinton Baptist. Clinton Baptist. But for you, it must have been like, what is going on here? I never went. He asked me to go see you that day. I went. Because I knew I was blagging it. Yeah. Did you actually think she'll fucking... Yeah, she's going to know to which. I was 21, 22, I thought she's got me, I'm done. What was her surname? Google that. No, I don't believe you, I'm not going. What was her surname? Eileen Drury. Did you ever have any rituals at England, like where you wet a certain thing before a game or you slept a certain way?

1:04:39Did you have anything superstitious like that? Not for England, no. I used to eat Turkish July the night before a game. Did you?

1:04:46Paddy McGuinness:I've shared with you all that time, I never knew that. I'm putting that open with that Eileen Drury thing that might have been later on later yeah you know me and Scorch we were best mates when we grew up together we were the worst roommates you'd ever seen I don't know how we lasted so long so we'd go to bed right about 7 o 'clock well we'd both go to bed at 7 o 'clock so nowhere else would fucking go yeah but I mean he would go to bed like get in bed and I'd have TV on and then I'd be awake with no TV on just wide awake and then in the morning I'd be knackered asleep when he'd be getting up at light six, I said, this is not good for me and we need to change roommates.

1:05:22Paddy McGuinness:Yeah. We did it for years. He's telling me, he was a nightmare. He couldn't have any light on. Do you know if there's a little red light on, I tell her, he had to go and cover it up with something. Oh, do you know who's like that? The spiral, if he hears somebody in the corridor, he's fucking jumping on what's going on, what's going on, what's going on. I'll tell you something like that. Peter Kay, when we first started off back in the day, you got no money or anything, so we used to share rooms, right? We used to share a bed, right? this is going to be good you get in the bed you come checking in and they go whoever he'd say like K and then they look at me and go no same thing they went just one bed and we go yeah we know so we get in bed together they must have thought you was a gay couple you just go we're just friends kind of thing but we'd be in bed and that'd be one of them so you'd be like that and he'd be like get up and he's pitched by and he goes what are you doing fucking cardigan behind the door I went what did he do he went I was a bit of like and then he'd be up fucking summit in front of Little Red Dog get in bed for fuck's sake since I had kids doesn't bother me no more I would tell kids that I couldn't I wouldn't sleep or anything he used to do that and then another thing he used to like wherever we were in country like say we're in the middle of summer and you I don't know let's just say we're in fucking Wales and we go, right, Saturday afternoon, he's got a gig at night, I'm with him.

1:06:49And we go, oh, we're roasting outside. Let's get out and have a little loop round Wales and a couple of drinks. Oh, well, I thought we'd watch a film in there. I went, watch a fucking film. 90 degrees outside? With curtains closed.

1:07:03Paddy McGuinness:No, but him, he's a talk. Like, same thing, no go. He'd have his curtains shut. Oh, yeah. His room in England was pitch black. Like, he'd walk in there all day like a vampire lived in there. it was just no air no pitch black and you go to Bex's room candles Bex he'd have candles lined up all over the table he'd honestly proper OCD yeah OCD you'd have tidiest room honestly you'd go like to an hotel for like two days he's like he is in between a game so you for example Havana when we played for the time in Casablanca he'd be like he'd be there for like 12 hours he'd take candles with him set all his candles up like that he'd have a little picture there and have a lamp with them Yankee ones all sorts but his room was like honestly black collar Calcutta it was minging nowhere nothing three to six weeks no window opening it was tidier I love how Beckson brought his own candles do you remember your room after the night out we had no celebrating the World Cup after the Italy game we took us to that little Italian oh that's what we took out the other week with Gazza You were drinking David Batty, weren't you?

1:08:14Yeah. David Batty was drinking... I used to like David Batty as a player. I love him. Brilliant. Good lad, good player. Yeah. He was drinking Cointreau and lemonade, David Batty. Fucking hell. Look at what that is. But he was saying, fuck it, you're so hard to like drinking that. But every time they'd come, he kept necking him. Fucking broke his neck. He was fucked. He was gone. He was drunk drinking Cointreau. He was absolutely gone. He stumbled on the coach. So we'd go and knock him up in the morning. Sick everywhere. Oh, it's horrible, isn't it? Just sick. I just want to clarify, though,

1:08:45Paddy McGuinness:I was allowed to do that because it was a celebration for getting into the... Yeah, but you're supposed to train after you mistrained. We all trained. No, I didn't mistrain. That's a lie. You mistrained. I didn't mistrain. It was controversial. You were a mess. I was a mess, but I got to train. Was it that bad that... Certain drinks, when you get a bad on them, if you smell them, you go, can't go near it. Pernod Black. Remember Snake Eyes? Mine's whiskey. Pernod Black topped up with K-Cider. Snake Eyes. K-Cider! I had a bad do on that. I used to work at Morrison's and there were pub across the road from Morrison's called the Sweet Green Tavern and they'd just come out, black bottle, red K on them.

1:09:19Red K, yeah. And one of the lads went, do you want one of these? I went, fucking hell, they're nice. Oh, about six or seven inch. Diamond White. You're a mirroring. Diamond White. They're Blast-A-Ways. Diamond White. Cast-A-Way, yeah. Cast-A-Way.

1:09:31Paddy McGuinness:And I put it in one glass at Yates' Wine Lodge in Ashton. Do you ever have a Turbo Shandy? That's a... It's a pint of lager with a Smirnoff. and then you pour it in bosh like that try that do you have the snake bite what's that half a cider half a lager when we talk about younger people do you ever have a black and tan no what's that that's mild and lager oh god no mild god have you ever heard that mild mild yeah anyway just say no just say no just say no thanks for joining us again on the good the bad and the football we're here every Monday from 6pm on YouTube Apple and Spotify. Also on the channel this week, we've got a special FA Cup podcast, Could It Be Magic?

1:10:14with Joe Cole, Ashley Cole and special guest, Jermaine Defoe. Hey, three great players there. Joe Cole, love him. Yeah, what a player. Exciting. Gets you on the edge of your seat. Don't you like we talk about? Ashley Cole, great defendant, Jermaine Defoe, what a goal scorer. Jermaine Defoe. Goal scorer.

1:10:30Paddy McGuinness:Ash was the best left back in the world. Yeah, he was at one point. Yeah, phenomenal. Phenomenal. We've got three top players. And that episode will be brought to you by Carlin.