Why More Stuff Doesn’t Make You Happier

0:06Pushkin.

0:11Hey, Happiness Lab listeners. Welcome back to our special series on spring cleaning your happiness. We're continuing our deep dive into the Happiness Lab closets to find all the show's well-being boosting insights that you might have missed. In today's episode, Throwback, we'll tackle the happiness boost that comes from literal spring cleaning. That is, decluttering all your material stuff. In this episode, you'll meet Kate Flanders, a writer who went deep into debt so she could buy all the clothes, books, and gadgets she thought would make her happier. But spoiler, buying all that stuff didn't work.

0:45But there was something that did. Throwing it all away. So get ready, because in this classic Happiness Lab episode, I, your intrepid host, will tackle a spooky British barn overflowing with movie monsters and a swanky California convertible ride with bad 80s music tunes. All so that I can teach you about the joy of letting go. That's all coming up when this throwback episode returns right after this quick break.

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4:00Pickup location. Uh, S-F-O. Pickup time. 12.30 p.m. If there's one car you absolutely have to rent when you go to San Francisco, it has to be compact, two-four-door, Ford Focus, or similar. I'm not really a car person. Automatic transmission, yes. Uh, aircon, yes. My regular ride is a slightly scruffy 2011 Nissan Sentra. Dual airbag. Awesome. If you can't picture that in your head, that's okay. I'm not sure anyone can. It's kind of a dull silver color. And relatively anonymous. Loss damage waiver. No. Child seat. No. When I travel for work, I usually rent the cheapest, boxiest, and most ordinary car on the lot.

4:52Prepaid gas? No. Uh, confirm rental. Done. But when my producer Ryan and I arrived at the San Francisco airport last fall, we were in for a bit of a surprise. The woman at the car rental place apologized profusely. They'd run out of normal boxy compact cars, and intermediates, and full sizes. Would it be okay, she asked, if instead of the car I booked, we accepted, at no extra cost, a bright red Mustang convertible.

5:32We in our amazing car took San Francisco by storm. We crossed and recrossed the Golden Gate Bridge and soaked up envious glances from teenage boys at crosswalks and blasted 80s synth pop on repeat the entire time. Instead of a dull trip into the city for work, Ryan and I had the time of our lives. laughing like idiots and making memories, all because of the car. That Mustang experience got Ryan thinking. He's always kind of hated my Sentra. He wants me to get a newer, safer car, especially since my Nissan does have a few bodywork issues. I kind of hit a huge rock. So Ryan started texting to make his case.

6:14Get a Mustang. Get a Mustang. Get a Mustang. Mustang. This carried on, and on, and on. One text contained a single word, all caps, with an exclamation point. Mustang! I know Ryan only wants what's best for me, but I have a mostly working car now. And the science suggests that giving in and buying a newer, more expensive vehicle would have a surprising effect on my well-being. It might hurt my happiness, rather than help it.

6:46Our minds are constantly telling us what to do to be happy. But what if our minds are wrong? What if our minds are lying to us, leading us away from what will really make us happy? The good news is that understanding the science of the mind can point us all back in the right direction. You're listening to The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos.

7:12I've had a lifelong fascination with the supernatural. I wrote a book about that. My first book was about why we believe in the supernatural. This is Bruce Hood, a professor of psychology at the University of Bristol in the UK. Like me, Bruce is intrigued by some of the weirder, more irrational parts of the human mind. But I didn't realize how personal that interest was until I visited his house for the first time. You see, Bruce lives in a lovely converted barn in a quaint, quiet part of the English countryside. And so I was expecting the inside of his house to look rather cozy.

7:49But that wasn't what I saw when I first opened the door.

7:59Everywhere I looked, there was blood, claws and fangs. Which is just the way Bruce likes it. I've loved horror movies and that sort of genre from a very early age. I became obsessional about buying vintage movie posters with werewolves and vampires and all that sort of thing. Bruce was able to actualize his childhood horror obsession once he finally got a professor-level salary. That was when he discovered the miracle of online auctions. I have over 100 posters now, and there's no way, I don't think anyone's got a house, well, not unless you're very wealthy, have got a house so you can easily accommodate them all.

8:36So a lot of them, I'm afraid, are just stored away. But I have framed most of them as many as I can, and they're all over the walls. You have over 100 of these. I have over 100. Yeah, and they're like a meter by two meters big, so they're not little things. They're big posters. Why would anyone buy more movie posters than they could possibly display? Bruce realized that it wasn't really the posters he loved so much. It was the pursuit. I would search on eBay and you can see the bidding line and you can offer a bid and then you see someone's outbid you and then you get frustrated. I used to get a real buzz and a thrill of I'd got it and then complete desperation and disappointment of I'd lost out to some other guy.

9:12And of course, the posts were turned up weeks later. And it was great getting them, but nothing compared to the kind of exhilaration of winning the auction. That thrill we get from buying a new prize on eBay is well understood by science. It's caused by a neurotransmitter called dopamine. Whenever we buy something exciting, the reward areas of our brain release a bunch of dopamine, which not only triggers a pleasurable sensation, but also makes it more likely that we'll repeat the behavior. evolutionarily speaking dopamine is there to ensure that we keep doing all the important things like eating and having sex but nowadays dopamine can just as easily make us chase after things that we don't really need for our survival like for example more vintage horror movie posters than can actually fit in your house of course bruce understands the science of dopamine knowledge is not enough you can know these things very objectively and yet still be a victim to the same sort of mechanism.

10:06So at least I kind of understood what was driving it. But I got to a point where I literally could not buy or put up any more. And after that, I kind of started to realize, well, this overconsumption thing, this possession thing is really interesting. Bruce began to study the science of why we like to accumulate so much stuff. This research became the basis of his recent book, Possessed, Why We Want More Than We Need. We buy for a number of reasons. There's a whole area of evolutionary theory called signaling. The poster child for signaling, of course, is the peacock. Why does it have such a silly tail?

10:38It costs so much in terms of energy. It's not very efficient. It makes them very vulnerable to attack. And yet these animals have evolved this elaborate display because it signals to potential mates that they have good genes. So rather than fighting or learning to run away or whatever, they've developed these signaling behaviors. Like peacocks strutting their stuff, we humans are naturally drawn to shiny cars, fancy clothes, and other status symbols. These things act as outward signs of how awesome we are on the inside. And so our species really likes to accumulate stuff. So much so that we've gone beyond just filling our shelves and closets and attics and garages.

11:16We've fueled a whole new growth industry, self-storage rentals. I mean, there are more storage units than there are McDonald's. It's just ridiculously a symptom of a culture which has become obsessed with possessions. So that's why I call the book Possessed, because it's like this demon, this little imp in our mind telling us to buy things, and don't throw it away because it might be valuable one day. But is all this purchasing really making us happier, at least beyond the initial pursuit? I mean, it doesn't really seem like it, which poses a bit of a paradox. since many scholars initially assumed that increased material wealth would lead to happiness.

11:54The Easterlin paradox was identified by Richard Easterlin back in the early 70s. And he noted that if you look at the gross national product of the U.S. in particular, as it's been rising, it doesn't seem to have a corresponding change in increased happiness. And so he said, that's the paradox. We should be happier. You may have heard the term retail therapy. And there's a sort of bit of truth in that. People do enjoy the process of shopping. But just like me and my posters, that initial buzz I get from doing it doesn't last very long. When the buzz of buying wears off, when that dopamine rush in our brain subsides, those new possessions can make us feel even sadder than we did before.

12:30The trouble is, is that as soon as you get something with outstanding quality, it makes all your other possessions look pretty rubbish. So this is called the Diderot effect after the French philosopher. He really wanted a dressing gown and he spent a lot of money on it and he really coveted it and he got it and he loved it. And he looked around and everything else looked a bit shabby. So then he realized he had to go and change everything else in his household. And he started to spend more money than he had. And he realized that, you know, in the past he had control of all his possessions. But as soon as he took on board this new thing of high status, that changed it.

13:03It almost controlled him. I experienced a hint of the Diderot effect when we rented that swanky Mustang.

13:12The valet at our hotel did look at me and Ryan a little oddly. Like he was surprised that the people who dropped off that kind of car had the crumpled clothes and crappy luggage that we did. As we rode the elevator to our rooms, I thought back to my beat-up Nissan, with its squeaky windshield wipers and sticky coffee cup holders. None of that had really bothered me when I drove it in earlier that morning. But now my own car seemed, well, pretty crappy. I mean, don't get me wrong, the Mustang was super fun to ride around in. But if it entered into my life on a more permanent basis, I might fall prey to that Diderot effect even more.

13:48I might wind up changing the other things in my life, to fit with the fact that I now owned a swanky car. As the name of Bruce's book suggests, my new ride might end up possessing me far more than I possessed it. The good news is that there is a way to enjoy the happiness boost that Ryan and I got from the Mustang ride, without ending up on a treadmill of buying a new car every few years. And we'll talk about that science-backed strategy when The Happiness Lab returns in a moment.

14:27I've been doing a little spring reset with my closet lately, focusing more on quality over quantity. Just building a wardrobe of pieces that are well-made, versatile, and easy to reach for every day. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. The fabrics feel elevated, the fits are thoughtful, and the pricing actually makes sense. Quince makes beautiful everyday pieces using premium materials, like 100 % European linen, organic cotton, and super soft denim. With styles starting around$50, their spring pieces are lightweight, breathable, and effortless. The kind of things you can throw on and instantly look put together.

15:03These days, I'm obsessed with Quince's washable, stretch, silk-tiered maxi dress. With a light hoodie, it's the perfect dress for spring weather. The fabric quality is comfy and light, and it feels way more high quality than I expected for the price. It's now one of my go-to pieces of the year. Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash happiness for free shipping and 365 day returns. now available in Canada too. Go to quince.com slash happiness for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash happiness. It's Wayfair Day at Wayfair. From April 25th through the 27th, you can score the best deals in home.

15:46Wayfair makes it easy to find exactly what fits your style and needs, from furniture and decor to home improvement and outdoor essentials. and it's all on sale during Wayday. My home has a very eclectic style, which can make it hard to find the perfect piece, but with Wayfair, it's easy. Take the gorgeous living room rug that I bought recently on Wayfair. The rug was the perfect color and it fits my strangely shaped couch super well. Wayfair makes it simple to narrow down exactly what works for your style and budget. Plus, Wayfair's filters and visual tools make it super easy to figure out if a new piece will actually fit your space.

16:22Wayday is the sale to shop the best deals in home. We're talking up to 80 % off with fast and free shipping on everything. Head to Wayfair.com April 25th through the 27th to shop Wayday. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair. Every style, every home. Happy Earth Month. Darnier is proudly partnering with the National Park Foundation, the official non-profit partner of the National Park Service. Garnier's support of the National Park Foundation's Service Corps program is enabling young adults and veterans to help care for and enhance the national parks that we all love. The National Park Foundation and Garnier are proud to support these individuals as they explore future careers, gain practical field skills, develop confidence as leaders, and help address priority projects across our national parks.

17:16Together, Garnier and the National Park Foundation are committed to a shared vision of preserving and protecting our most treasured places for future generations. Want to lend a hand? Explore Garnier's partnership with the National Park Foundation and learn how you can help support our national parks at garnierusa.com slash NPF. Seeking more brightness these days, research shows that simply gazing at bodies of water like the Pacific Ocean can help lower your heart rate and increase feelings of relaxation. Consider a trip to sunny San Diego. Put your toes in the sand. Smell and feel the ocean breeze.

17:56Spending time in nature can be great for your mental health. And as you soak up the bright side, feel your taste buds, your health, and your wellness with a local cuisine fueled by San Diego's year-round farm-fresh produce. San Diego isn't just a destination. It's a disposition. Come to the bright side. Plan your trip to San Diego by going to sandiego.org. dot org. Funded in part with City of San Diego Tourism Marketing District Assessment Funds.

18:34So maybe they make us happy for a little while, but over time we just stop deriving as much satisfaction from them. I wanted to find some evidence-based strategies to help me decide about this car situation. And so I decided to call a world expert on happier purchasing. I'm Amit Kumar. I'm an assistant professor of marketing and psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. Amit studies the way our minds mispredict the pleasure we get from what we buy. And so I told him about my car dilemma. Based on his research, he predicted that any happiness boost I'd derive from buying that Mustang wouldn't last much longer than the new car smell.

19:11If you've listened to other episodes of The Happiness Lab, you might know the reason why. A phenomenon that psychologists have christened hedonic adaptation. We just get used to stuff far quicker than we think. What seemed kind of new and exciting, at first that excitement tends to fade. I guess the other thing is that it's always there in front of you, so when it malfunctions or if something goes wrong, you're just kind of bothered by that. But there's a second reason that our possessions don't make us as happy as we think. That green-eyed monster is always with us. People are often kind of peeved when they find out that someone else has a nicer TV than they do or if they have a fancier wardrobe.

19:52It can be similarly annoying to find out that someone who has the same thing that you do, like the same gadget that you have or something like that, paid substantially less for it. So these sorts of destructive comparisons can stand in the way of happiness. So if I caved in and splurged on a new car, not only would every scratch and dent make me sadder, but I'd also unwittingly enter an arms race with my friends and neighbors, comparing my purchase to whatever car they had in their driveways. And even a new Mustang would look crappy next to my colleague's brand new Tesla. But Amit's research shows that there's an alternative kind of purchase we can make that can bring us some lasting joy.

20:35Money could make us happier if we made different decisions or choices with what we did with it. To get the most happiness bang for our buck, we should make purchases that are experiential rather than material. So experiential purchases are essentially something that you spend money on that's an event or a series of events that you live through. So basically it's money that you spend on doing things like travel, vacations, dining out, going to concerts, sporting events. If you're anything like me, you might feel a bit bad about spending more of your money on meals and trips. It can feel a little frivolous.

21:10So in some sense, they might seem fleeting. But in a way, this is actually a benefit of experiences compared to possessions. So people do tend to habituate to get used to things and derive less value from them over time. With an experience that's already over, that doesn't seem to happen. But experiences don't just make us feel better after we finish them. Experiential purchases can also make us happier than material possessions, even before we get to enjoy them. One thing that's interesting about waiting is that waiting can also sometimes feel good. So when it comes to material possessions, it feels more like impatience or anxiety or frustration.

21:51But with respect to experiential purchases, waiting is just a more positive state. We tend to look forward to what's to come with great excitement and delight. we look at restaurant menus and we go through our travel plans in advance, that tends to feel good instead of bad. But Amit has found that the biggest reason experiences bring us more joy is that they aren't normally a solitary activity. So if your purchases are promoting social interaction, if you're talking about the things that you've done, or if you're doing them with other people, that's one reason they're going to make you happier than some material items that you might buy.

22:28And experiential purchases don't just keep us social while we're doing them. They also let us connect with people afterwards, too. So if you go on a vacation somewhere, there's all sorts of things that you can talk about, what you did, what you saw, who you were with, what you ate. There's just lots of directions to go. It's a bit harder with material goods. And sharing stories about things you've done, or just reliving the memories, also has another happiness-boosting effect. It turns out that sort of generally speaking, reflecting on experiential purchases inspires more gratitude than reflecting on material purchases.

23:03So people are more grateful for what they've done than for what they have. Part of the reason that this is particularly interesting is because of what gratitude tends to predict. So researchers have found that feeling grateful is associated with a whole host of positive outcomes. So in some fun studies we've done, for instance, we found that when people think about their experiences rather than possessions they've bought, they end up being more generous to others. They end up treating other people better as a result of reflecting on their experiential purchases. All this goes to say, experiences, be they big or small, they beat material purchases on literally every happiness metric Amit has studied.

23:45And yet, we still can't seem to break our habit of filling our closets and attics and garages with so much stuff. So after the break, I'll introduce you to a person who has taken this research to heart. Someone who became so weighed down by her possessions that she decided to get rid of nearly all of them. And became a lot happier as a result. If I'm really honest, if I didn't love it or use it, it was gone. The Happiness Lab will be right back.