COLD CUTS: Not The Bees

0:00Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keyzie. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

0:06Keyzie:Oh yes indeed, T-Rex there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Tuesday night. Let's give out some advice, fellas. Meet PaddyNip69 at gmail.com.

0:20Mike Minogue:Get in touch with the fellas. Yeah, man. It's a real email address, meetpaddynip69 at gmail.com. If you ever need anything, you reach out. We answer your advice on the podcast slash radio show. Yes. And if you get in touch and we read it out, you get a$50 Reburger voucher unless you've already had one. You've already had one. Yes. Yeah, we can't be doing that. Otherwise, Reburger. They get up in arms about it. Yes. Especially after the Reburger v. Burger incident. Exactly. We're hanging on by a thread here, fellas.

0:49Jason Hoyte:So this email has come in from anonymous at gmail.com. Hey, fellas. I'm sure Hoity Jizz is grateful for the European travel tips you've given him but I find myself needing some travel tips before I head to Vietnam at the end of the month, Jase, if I could just... I have most of the travel... How good! I have most of the travel plans sorted just at a bit of a loss in regards to money like I thought it was wise to get a wise travel card but I've been told it's best to have some cash on hand also I heard you can get good exchange rates as well but that makes me nervous Hoody J, nervous to get the exchange over there.

1:27Jason Hoyte:Hoody J, as the Vietnam travel expert, what did you do? Like, I'm thinking of getting my dong out at the airport. What would you recommend? Thank you, Anonymous.

1:35Keyzie:Definitely get your dong out at the airport. At which end? Both ends. I would go Wise, the Wise card, because it's bloody good. And it is good to get a bit of dong as well, because there's a lot of really small little places on the pavement there where people are sort of, you know, doing their business, as it were. Taking a shit. Doing their business, like selling, you know. Oh, running a business. Selling coffees and stuff like that. And they don't have, you know, Eftpos machines and all that sort of stuff. Eftpos. I mean, that's the correct pronunciation.

2:13Jason Hoyte:I haven't heard of Eftpos with such a hard T in it before.

2:16Keyzie:So, you know, it's really nice to have a bit of cash because there were a lot of times where I was like, oh, damn it. Yeah. Because I want to buy something from them to support them, and I've got no damn cash on me.

2:26Mike Minogue:You can't get your dong out. No, you need to have dong in hand or some dong in your wallet because especially a place in Southeast Asia, like I've done your Cambodias, I've done your Singapores, I've done your, you know, those kind of areas, Malaysias. I find you want to have about a 60-40 split of digital cash being 60 on your WiseCard there because you can always get more out. Yes. And with your WiseCard or other travel cards, you can use an ATM machine even if you feel it's a bit dodgy because they can only access what you've got in your account, which you can just make sure you've got$500 in there.

3:00Mike Minogue:You know what I mean? Yeah, totally. And you want 40 % dong because all the best food, you know, the authentic stuff, you can't use eft post.

3:09Keyzie:Yeah, you have to go dong.

3:11Mike Minogue:You have to go dong.

3:13Keyzie:That's actually very good advice, Casey, because that's pretty much what we did. about 60 % on the card and about 40 % dong.

3:21Mike Minogue:Yeah. The other thing too, here's a piece of advice. Don't go to the airport. Go to one of the ones like at malls around New Zealand. They have currency exchanges. Yes. And if you are going to, you know, for example, Cambodia, their currency is US dollar and they'll give you change in their local currency, which is less valuable, but they won't accept a note if it's got a tear or anything weird on it. So ask for brand new bills, which these currency exchanges often do have, especially the ones at malls. Right, okay. And so, like, go to the mall like a week out, get it locked in, get brand new bills because they're a bit iffy about it over in Southeast Asia.

4:00Keyzie:There you go. Wow, that was comprehensive.

4:01Mike Minogue:That was very serious advice. It was very good advice. Yeah, and it's kind of out of place, right? So I guess also get divorced. The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

4:12Keyzie:Yes, indeed, the Rolling Stones there on the Radio Hauraki. Big show this Wednesday night. Fiello's.

4:20Jason Hoyte:Fiello's. I need some advice from you. God, you need a lot of advice, Pugs.

4:25Keyzie:Fire out, man. Can't you just take a grip of your life and just, you know, deal with stuff?

4:28Mike Minogue:Yeah, or do what everyone else does and email us, meetpattynips69 at gmail.com.

4:32Jason Hoyte:You might even win a voucher if you do that. A re-burger one? Yes. God forbid that I come to two fellas that I trust and I know have a hell of a lot of experience in radio, and they've made good radio, and they've made shit radio, and some of them are even old rams put out to, what is it, old rams or something like that.

4:51Keyzie:Can I give you some advice right off the bat here, Puckson?

4:53Jason Hoyte:You're a fool to trust us. Fantastic. Well, this is actually financial advice, Jason. I know you have a whole segment on here called the Financial Report. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My partner went to this free investment seminar. You'll love her. that went to this free investment seminar over here at the office today that they put on for people that are budding investors or maybe looking to see if it's for them.

5:18Keyzie:Did they have snacks and stuff like club sandwiches and that sort of carry on?

5:22Jason Hoyte:How's this, Jase? Free pizza. Yeah, I mean, I'm not big on pizza, but anyway. And basically my partner came over after the seminar there and she handed me a brochure on getting into investing with this app and a piece of pizza as well. And I just wondered if you guys might be able to give me some advice on getting into investing because I know nothing about it. I didn't go to the seminar, but I don't really – I kind of want to sound like I know what I'm talking about.

5:48Mike Minogue:Yeah, so the first thing you need to know, rule one of the first day of investing school, the first lesson, the teacher walks in. Let's say the teacher's name is Professor Kesey, Teaching Investment 101. He gets out his piece of chalk. He writes, hello, my name is Professor Kesey on the whiteboard, really loud and sort of screechy. Yes. And then he turns around, he says four words, buy high, sell low.

6:13Keyzie:Yeah, man, that's great advice. Buy what?

6:15Mike Minogue:And then he throws the duster at the dude in the front saying, buy what? I haven't finished yet. Stocks. Okay, so that's five words.

6:24Keyzie:In all seriousness, a good investment at the moment, because I follow the markets religiously. Which markets? The stock markets and all that sort of stuff. Sunday veggie markets. Property markets, the veggie markets. Facebook markets? You know what's hot property at the moment? Property? Merkins. Oh, Merkins. Wait, what's a Merkin? A Merkin is like fake pubic hair.

6:46Mike Minogue:It's a wig for your downstairs. Yes.

6:48Keyzie:So you can have them in all sorts, like a heart-shaped example there.

6:53Jason Hoyte:Do you have to get rid of your existing hair to don Merkin? You would, yeah.

6:57Mike Minogue:You definitely would. So what you could do is go get a little pamphlet on Merkins. Yes. And then you know how she, because you were saying that she gave you the pamphlet with the pizza on top. Yeah. And then you ate the pizza and was like, oh, what's this underneath? A pamphlet. Yeah. Do the same thing but food that she likes. So get a big pile of tofu and just put it on top of a Merkin pamphlet. Yes. And then hand that to her. Some panera or something. And then say, Daddy's keen to do some investing. Huh? And then see how you get on. Yeah, I reckon. Oh, cheers, fellas. No, is there anything else you need, man?

7:27Mike Minogue:You all good? No, I think I'm really good.

7:30Keyzie:And you can do what Kesey's done in terms of if you're going to be sensible with your money, have like 50 accounts. That's right.

7:35Mike Minogue:Yeah, have a fun account. You know what? I'm good. You could have a wacky tattoo account. Ah! The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

7:47Keyzie:REM there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. New Zealand 13 for one. What over's that, Maggie? The seventh? We're in the seventh. Seventh completed. Chasing 175 for the victory. Now, fellas, I'm a pretty chill fella. I think you'd all agree, wouldn't you? So chill, man. Shit, you're chill. But every now and then, something really, really fires me up. Does it bug you? Yeah, it bugs me.

8:15Mike Minogue:It's been bugging me.

8:20Keyzie:And I was chatting to old Pugson there in Studio B. Oh, yeah. And he was telling me about a plan he had for dinner. and initially I thought it was a piss take but he's deadly serious and it's his plan to make a tofu carbonara. Right. And I don't know, there was just something about that that enraged me so much and I think you a little bit too, Kesey. The most disgusting idea I have ever heard and I think I still don't know if he's taking the piss or not.

8:59Jason Hoyte:Pugs, are you taking the piss with that man? With the tofu carbonara recipe? Yeah. No, no. Jase, let me start by saying I am thrilled to hear that even today something really fires you up, man. Totally. Even at your ripe age of 39. Is he 39? I'm losing track of what's going on here.