FULL SHOW: Big Shot Keyzie

8:18Mike Minogue:We don't have time, man. You've got to play the White Stripes. Oh. You got interrupted, right? By a gang of you. We don't have time. We don't have time. Here's the White Stripes. The Hauraki Beat Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. One simple question. One weekend of a lifetime. Would You Rather?

8:40Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Would you rather Bathurst and or the NRL Grand Final?

8:47Mike Minogue:Just to correct you there, it's not and or. You can't do both.

8:50Keyzie:Or the Grand Final or Bathurst. And?

8:55Mike Minogue:Would you rather Bathurst and the Grand Final? Yes. Yeah, see that? Thank you. And then all of a sudden, you know, we're giving away two shots. Certainly when it comes to the prizes, we don't want to be making false promises, Keezy. Yeah, totally. Totally. We don't want to be doing that. Don't want to be saying that people can win something that they can't.

9:12Keyzie:Can't win. Yeah, that would be correct, fellas. That's never been on the table.

9:15Mike Minogue:That would be ridiculous. That would be like saying, oh, we've got$8 million to give away, a guy in the urinal told me, and then it doesn't even happen.

9:22Keyzie:I mean, that would be career-ending, Gizzy. Yeah, totally, man. Shocking bastard stuff. But let's go to the phone lines. G'day, James, you mad bastard. How's life? G'day, fella.

9:33Mike Minogue:That was very good, mate.

9:34Keyzie:How are you going? Oh, thanks, man. Good. Thank you for asking, James. James, what do you do for a crust?

9:42Mike Minogue:Yeah, well, I've changed jobs. I'm actually a loader driver at a rescue station now. Oh, backbone. Yeah, good. Is that fun, man, just going around just dumping crap all over the place? You know what? It's better than dropping steamers, I tell you. Yeah. I don't know, man. Have you ever dropped a steamer mid-Secret Santa, James? What was that say, mate? Don't worry about it. Hey, what would you rather, man, Bathurst or the NRL Grand Final? Oh, that's a silly question. It's the NRL Grand Final all day. Yeah, good on you. Come on, Keezy, man. Why did you even ask him that, Keezy? I don't know what he's into, man.

10:20Mike Minogue:What a silly question. Hey, James, who would you take with you if you won, mate? I'd take my mate Marty. He actually put me to the Tigers a couple of years ago free of charge, so I guess I'd better repay the favour. Why should you repay them for taking you long to see those hopeless mongrels? I mean, we were playing them to be fair. Oh, yeah. Backbone, backbone.

10:39Keyzie:Good on you, James. You're in the draw. Puck's arm will sort you out. Let's go to that mad bastard Gibbo. G'day, Gibbo. How's life? Hey, not bad horse. What about you?

10:51Mike Minogue:Horse? Yeah, mate. I like it. Hey, Gibbo, where are you calling from today, man? I'm up in Fungas, mate. Oh, yeah. Yeah, man.

11:00Keyzie:Beautiful day out there, is it, mate? Oh, there's not a cloud in the sky, mate. Palm trees are blowing gently in the breeze. Oh, how nice. Tell me, Gabbo, what do you do for a crust? I run a machinery business, mate. Oh, yeah, backbone. Backbone. There's backbone. What kind of machinery are we talking here? Excavators, rollers. Oh, yeah, that's real backbone stuff.

11:22Mike Minogue:The whole works burger, mate. How good. Do you have a steamroller, Gabbo? No, no, no, no. I haven't got a steam one, mate. I haven't got a steam one. Okay, just a motorised one. Yeah, fair enough. All G.

11:32Keyzie:Now, can I guess what Gibbo's going to pick here?

11:36Mike Minogue:Go for it.

11:36Keyzie:I reckon he's going to go Bathurst.

11:40Mike Minogue:Gibbo? Mate, I tell you what, when you're looking at a bus ride, three hours either side of six hours racing, that's value, isn't it? Yeah, mate. 100%, man. That's there. This guy gets it. This guy gets it. There you go. Which one are you locking in, Gibbo? Bathurst? Is the 8 mil still on the table? The 8 mil? No, it's not, mate. Sorry. that's just been taken out. Sorry about that. We better do Bathurst then. All right, mate. You're in the draw. Pugson will look after you. Gibbo, eh? Mad bastard. Mad. Big shout out to boystrip.co.nz. Sports travel made easy. If you want to go to Bathurst or if you want to go to the Grand Final, well, Grand Final, to be honest, it's sold out.

12:17Mike Minogue:Yes. The Boys Trip packages, however, there are still some available for Bathurst. The Boys Trip packages have sold out and so has the Grand Final Kesey itself. Wow, the whole thing. The whole thing has sold out weeks and weeks and weeks ago. It feels like we're on track for something special here, fellas. Yeah, I... It really does. This is a hot ticket here.

12:34Keyzie:I've got a feeling about this this year, fellas. I really, really do.

12:42Mike Minogue:What happened with those dudes that were outside your window, by the way? Oh. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

12:53Keyzie:Yes, indeed. REM there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday afternoon. and the time is 4.53. Let's talk TV. What's on the telly with Mike Minogue?

13:09Keyzie:Yeah! That's right. Hey fellas, today I went along to a special screening. It was very special. Alright? The film is called Heart of the Beast. Okay. Starring Brad Pitt. Oh yeah. Now you're talking. Oh, is that the one

13:26Mike Minogue:where he's in the forest with the dog? That's right. I'll give you the rundown here. After surviving a plane crash, a former Special Forces soldier finds himself trapped in the unforgiving Alaskan wilderness with his combat dog. Okay. Together they battle the elements and other animals in a harsh landscape that would likely kill any other man or dog. I don't think they've nailed that synopsis, that last line there. But very limited cast. It's got your Brad Pitt in it, J.K. Simmons and a dog. Filmed in New Zealand last year. I'm surprised how quickly this has come out because it was only filmed last year.

13:58David Eyre is the director. He's really good. He directed Fury, amongst other things. Maybe a Suicide Squad as well. And God, it's possibly the best advertisement for New Zealand in a film since Lord of the Rings. Right, yeah. Absolutely stunning. And nothing like the beauty of Brad Pitt up against the beauty of New Zealand. The two just go hand in hand. Absolutely stunning. It's an hour and 40 minutes long, which is an instant five buzies out of five buzies for old Mogey. I hate a long movie. I can't tell you what I thought of the movie. I'm not allowed to give it a review because there's an embargo on it.

14:35Yeah. But I'll tell you this, I'll be going again, fellas.

14:38Keyzie:Do you know, I often wonder if cameramen from outside of New Zealand come to New Zealand and just go, yeah, boy. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? It's like a dream kind of set up. It is. For, you know, your cameraman, Keezy. What about camera women? Or woman, yes indeed. I don't know if you know, this is a very, very attractive and highly photographic country we live in. Yes.

15:02Mike Minogue:New Zealand. New Zealand. Yeah, right. Very nice. I'll look into it. This movie is out on the 24th of September. I can't go into details, as I said, but I recommend you go.

15:11Keyzie:Fellas, I watched Pap last night, and by that I mean just, you know, it was something to do with, you know, family members killing each other. but it was a you know like a crime docker yeah it was like a series actually and people are just dumb is that it yeah that was it man how many buzies um one buzzy out of five out of five buzies wow it was lazy because we just went I don't know man we'll just go with this crap you know what I mean you know what I mean I feel you dog I feel you

15:41Mike Minogue:last night we watched the second to last episode ever of Colin from Accounts which is an Australian comedy it's on TVNZ Plus three seasons bloody good My wife has done the thing When she likes a TV show Of following the main cast members On Instagram Right Doing a deep dive into that And then Because husband and wife Wrote the show And they play the two main characters And then they also take turns At writing each episode Right So one's written I can tell Because one episode Is written in a particular flavour And then the next episode Is very different And they're all great That's very interesting And then she watched A behind the scenes interview With the cast Because there's only one episode Left to go And the question to them Was like If it made you filthy rich, would you make a fourth season?

16:23Mike Minogue:And they both said no. Yeah. Yeah, we'll see. But they're just like, we're done with this. The expectation and the amount of time it takes for you as a couple to work on and organise every facet of this TV show and get it all out and be the main characters. Well, what else are they doing? It'll be all-consuming. I mean, they're busy.

16:42Keyzie:Can you imagine the hurl of fights they had? Yeah. They would have had full-on fights. Creative disagreements Well imagine if your partner wrote a terrible episode What do you do then? Fire up That's a shock

16:58Mike Minogue:They're all pretty good But Patrick Bremel, I think his name is He was in The Devil Wears Prada 2 Oh yes As her love interest Yes And got slammed by critics Is that Anne Hathaway? Anne Hathaway's love interest He got slammed by critics today Yeah, they just said he was like a nothing character And then he went on Instagram and was like Oh they cut literally everything out of the movie that I was in Yeah, yeah, right Because he was so terrible Because he was, yeah But he's actually super funny. He is. He's great. Such a great actor. It's a good show. Colin from Accounts, TVNZ Plus. Give the whole thing 4.2 busies out of five.

17:27Keyzie:Yeah, great stuff.

17:28Mike Minogue:Hey, after five, fellas, we've got two of the leads from Cirque du Soleil, Alice coming out. Oh, how good. Alice in Wonderland and the Mad Hatter as well. Plus, I've got some questions now that I'm a full-blown actor.

17:39Keyzie:Sure, man, sure.

17:42Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

17:48Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope your Wednesday is absolutely going off. You're listening to The Big Show, incidentally, brought to you by Reburger.

17:57Mike Minogue:Crave with your street food, freshly made with Reburger. Yum. Yeah, yum. Fun fact about Reburger, when you go into a Reburger store, all the employees there are wearing hats. That's true. Well, they're not employees, they're family, aren't they? and the hats, you'll notice, have got the Reburger logo, but it used to be red and yellow and now it's black. Yes. Why is that, Jase?

18:21Keyzie:Well, you'll recall, fellas, there was a brief time when Reburger weren't sponsoring us anymore, but I love their cap. But I didn't want to be a sort of walking advertisement for them because they were no longer our sponsor. So I went, I love the hat and it fits me so well. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to black out the Reburger symbol there so you can't really see it. I did it with a vivid marker.

18:48Mike Minogue:And can I just say, you couldn't see anything. You just couldn't see anything. Oh, it was amazing.

18:52Keyzie:Then Kesey and I were down in Dunedin, Mogi. I don't know where you were. I was doing a little bit of work. I was also down there, but I was doing a bit of work. Oh, that's right, yes. Doing a live show, and we were having a chat to the fellas from Reburger. And one of them looked at my hat and they went, Boris. Boris, and he went, oh, is that a Reburger hat? And I said, yeah, man. He said, I really like it. And he noticed that I'd coloured it all in black. So you'll notice now the new Reeburger hat has a black instead of the yellow and orange and whatever it was. It's just black now. Yes. Because Hoity J blacked it out all that year, about a year ago, and they went, that's cool.

19:31Keyzie:We're doing that. And you had to sit down, didn't you, with Vivid and colour in every single one of them. Yes, I did. Unbelievable. That's a big job, man. But such is your commitment to the Reburg year. It just kept running out all the time, the bloody David. You know what I mean? They do. Really annoyed me.

19:46Mike Minogue:It was like a box for like 500 hats, wasn't it?

19:48Keyzie:Yeah, I know.

19:49Mike Minogue:Far out. Did they pay you?

19:51Keyzie:Well, yes. They gave me a hat.

19:54Mike Minogue:That's pretty good.

19:55Keyzie:Yeah, I reckon. It's Arctic Monkeys.

19:58Mike Minogue:The Hauraki Big Show. Weekdays from four on Radio Hauraki.

20:02Keyzie:Yes, indeed. She-hard there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show. This Wednesday afternoon. The time is 13 minutes past 5 o 'clock

20:11Mike Minogue:Fellas, I've been talking over the past week About an audition I had recently for an ad Yes Went really well Well, I mean, I assume it did Because I got a call back Yeah, man Which is where you sort of get shortlisted And you come back and do it again But with a funny wig on this time Yes Which is what happened Yeah And also, there's a man in the room with a camera Cameraman Cameraman Or person Yeah, but this was a man Or woman This is a man. And then the director was on Zoom or Skype or whatever it's called. Oh, yeah. On the computer looking at me and giving me directions. I then today got a criminal check.

20:49Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah. Criminal background check. Yes. And I was like, well, that's got to be a good sign, you know. Sure. Well, for people who don't know, you go and do these auditions and things, and if they want you, they then do a criminal check because they don't want you getting on air and then somebody complaining because you've got X, Y, and Z.

21:05Keyzie:Convictions. Convictions. Often the most specific ones is you don't want someone doing, say, a drink driving ad who's got multiple convictions for drink driving. Yes. Makes sense.

21:14Mike Minogue:I get it. So obviously that was sweet as clean as a whistle, old Keezy. But I was just wondering because – Skeletons in the closet there. Yeah. Holy heck. I mean, I did a test and it was fine. But I guess the reason I want to talk to you guys is obviously – I mean, this is like my fourth audition, and it's quite clear that I'm going to bag this thing. you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I was just wondering, now that I am kind of an actor, should I, do I, for example, this is just random quick, do I make my own IMDB webpage? Right. So the online movie database, whatever it's called, so that whenever you search an actor, I come up, because I'm now an actor.

21:57Mike Minogue:Did you make your own ones? You should have yours set up now. Four auditions in the last couple of years. Yeah, okay. I turned down a few, one callback. One callback. Yeah, that's good, man.

22:10Keyzie:That's a pretty good strike rate. One out of four. Yeah.

22:13Mike Minogue:25 % hit rate. Should I put the TV shows, non-acting TV shows I was part of? I wouldn't mention the Ditch.

22:20Keyzie:Yeah, I wouldn't do the shows you've done. Or the League Lounge. Yeah, just leave those.

22:24Mike Minogue:So none of the ones that were cancelled?

22:26Keyzie:No, no, don't put that out there.

22:28Mike Minogue:Okay, but okay. Good God.

22:29Keyzie:I mean, really, I'm telling you as your agent, don't do that. Right, okay. Okay.

22:35Mike Minogue:I don't have to be so intense about it. Why, just... I want you to succeed, Keezy. Do you? Yeah, man. You don't want things to come screeching to a halt. No, you're right, Moggy. It's all about keeping this good thing going. And also, aiming high. I was wondering also, Moggy, did you fill out your own application when you won the Actor of the Year Award? Or did someone else do that for you? Just because I feel like I should... Chris, I was so shocked and surprised. Generally, it's the producer that will put you forward. Okay. So I should have a question. Yeah. So, yeah. I'm not sure that there is a category for - For advertorials.

23:15Yeah. What you're doing there.

23:17Keyzie:Right, okay. It might be sort of, yeah, nah.

23:21Mike Minogue:Well, if it's all right, Jason, I'll probably get this from Mike just because he's won it.

23:24Keyzie:Yeah. Yeah. I actually got I actually won an award For my acting But I turned it down Oh yeah What was the award? Best male lead Right

23:38Mike Minogue:Tell me this was outside of school

23:40Keyzie:In a school production

23:45Mike Minogue:Should I put actor in my Instagram bio? Wow I'll just say that Whenever you're coming into the country Or leaving the country You're You know Your occupation should now be actor. Oh, when I fill out the little declaration. When you fill out the customs form, yeah, actor. Oh, that sounds cool. Or is it thespian? Or pretender. Yeah, yeah. Pretender, is that another name for it, is it? It's another name for what you do, yeah. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Kesey. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

24:15Keyzie:Pearl Jam there on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. The time is 5.26. But listen up, New Zealand. If you want to win yourself a double pass to watch the WARS this weekend, give us a call right now on 0800 Hauraki.

24:31Mike Minogue:That's right. They're playing Saturday evening, 5pm, against the Manly Seagulls at good old Mount Smart. Time to chat footy with me, Keezy. What are the Warriors up to? It's WARS Wednesday, fellas. Yeah, man. Which is when we get a double pass to give away, which is bloody exciting. Last regular season home game of the season, and Mogey. And it was a real risk this game that you book tickets and then the Waz name a pretty, you know, B team to rest all their main guys. But they're only resting two chaps really. Wade Egan and also Kurt Capewell. Yes. Both have had a long season. Both very experienced.

25:08Mike Minogue:Very crucial. However, I was listening to old Raylene Ramsey reading the news there before. Raylene.

25:13Keyzie:She's a backbone.

25:14Mike Minogue:She is. And she was saying that Aaron Clark and James Fisher Harris said no to resting. Yes. They were like, we're playing. which I love. Isn't that just fantastic? Yeah, that's good. Yeah, and I think it's okay because they're going to have a week off shortly anyway. Yeah. So because we're finishing the top two, you get a week off around the semi. So good on them. And the other thing is I think it's really important, Kese. You tell me, man. What you don't want to do is bring in two halves that have been out for three or four weeks due to injury and have them come back in and put them in behind a makeshift pack that is then going backwards during the game so they can't get their flow on.

25:51You need them in their mojo back. Yeah, they need to get their feet under the desk, man. Thank you. Yeah, yeah.

25:57Keyzie:Or their slippers under the bed.

25:59Mike Minogue:Yeah, that's a saying in league. It's like, Jase, for example, if we had a really big week of radio coming up, right? Yes. And the week before, the bosses were like, hey, do you want the week off? Yep. You know, going into this big week, we'd all say no, right?

26:12Keyzie:No, totally, man. Totally. Not in your nelly.

26:15Mike Minogue:Yeah, we'd do it, right? Yeah, I'd put my slippers under the bed, man. I don't know if that's a saying, Jase. G'day, Dylan. Dylan, how you going, man?

26:22Keyzie:Oh, g'day, Keezy. Good, mate. Good, good, good. Good on you, Dylan, you mad bastard. What do you do for a crust, by the way?

26:29Mike Minogue:Ice cream, brother.

26:30Keyzie:Ice cream?

26:31Mike Minogue:Hey, back, mate. Sorry, you're making it. You're driving a truck. What are you doing? Making it. Fully making it, man. Fully making it. So you're making it from scratch, man? Are you out back milking the cow? From, what's it called? From cow to plate. From teat to plate.

26:47Keyzie:Oh, nice. How bloody good, mate. And obviously, Dylan, you're a massive WARS fan.

26:53Mike Minogue:Oh, yeah, man. Went to high school with old Fisher Harris there. Oh, did you?

26:56Keyzie:Where was that exactly, mate?

26:59Mike Minogue:I hung it at boys. Oh, yeah, good, good, good.

27:01Keyzie:Tell me, Dylan, who are you going to take with you?

27:05Mike Minogue:I'll pick up my mate on the way, and, yeah, old Zane. We'll go up for the old game there, yeah. Old Zane, oh, he's a mad dog. Old James Fisher Harris there, man. What do you remember from school, man? Were you guys pretty tight? Yeah, he was my bloody roommate at boarding school. Oh, there you go. How about that? Wow. Has he got a bit of a sense of humour on him? You don't see him laughing very much. Oh, he's a cracker. Is he? Yeah, okay. This guy gets it. He got him. Good on you, Diller. Oh, hell good. You hold the line, mate. Pugs will sort you out, but have fun at the WARS on Saturday. You all right?

27:36Mike Minogue:Yeah, cheers, fellas. Thank you very much. No worries, mate. Good on you, man.

27:38Keyzie:Have a good one. Good. Hey, coming up next, by the way, we're going to be speaking to the stars of Cirque, Alice, Dizzy, and Layla.

27:47Mike Minogue:That's right. Cirque du Soleil, Alice in Wonderland, me and Mogi went on Friday, and it was absolutely magnificent. We loved it. The Hauraki Big Show with Jase, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki.

28:01Keyzie:Welcome back, you massive backbones. Hope you're surviving your hump day okay. You're listening to The Big Show, by the way, brought to you by Reburger.

28:09Mike Minogue:Serving good times and good food. Dine in or take away Reburger today. Reburger.

28:15Keyzie:Yeah, man. Yeah, man.

28:17Mike Minogue:Hey, Jase. Yeah, man. What are you having for dinner tonight, man?

28:20Keyzie:Re-burger.

28:21Mike Minogue:Oh, here he is. Are you?

28:22Keyzie:Yeah. You sure you're having a re-burger? Yeah, totally. Totally. Really?

28:26Mike Minogue:Because a little birdie told me that you're getting the hot pot.

28:29Keyzie:No, no, no. You don't want to overdo that sort of stuff. At heart, I'm a down country kind of young – oh, not young, I suppose. No. You know, I like my burgers. I love my chips. And some days, it's just the right time.

28:46Mike Minogue:Yeah, and today's re-burger day? Yeah, I think so. Right, right. What spice level are you going to get?

28:49Keyzie:Especially now that they're, you know, in the CBD. Oh. You know what I mean? I was very excited to hear that.

28:57Mike Minogue:Are you talking about the one on Key Street? Yes, that's the one, Key. Z. Moggy, tonight? Tonight, yes, it exists. You and I, Key Z, we're going to be going out on a little date together, and you're just saying to me, oh, I'm a little bit hungus. The date that we're going on, they're going to have food there. Yeah, I was going to say, sure. I have horse duves. Canapes, yeah. Yeah, canapes. Canaps. To be honest, though, the issue with canapes is I'm too like... Much of a guts to just have one and sort of leave it at that. You're like, grab the tray and you're just like shoveling it down.

29:33Keyzie:Just leave those there, mate, is what Kesey says. Just leave the tray. I take the tray off them. Yeah. No, but the issue is I can't... You take the uniform off them and then you're going around and you're just grabbing all the trays, pretending you work there, but you take them into the toilets there, the cubicle, and you just scoff at them.

29:48Mike Minogue:I take them into the toilets, and then I just dump them all on the floor in a pile, and then I get down on all fours. And look over your shoulder. And then start eating, and then Mogi comes through the front door, and I look back over my shoulder on all fours. And I say, I thought I'd find you here. Yeah. With crepe all over your face. Yeah, crepe. Crepe. Hey, fellas, actually, you know, all jokes aside. Yes. Coming up next, I have to make an apology to the listeners. You do, man. You do. Because I made one of the biggest mistakes of my career yesterday on the show. Yeah, I know. And I feel terrible.

30:21Keyzie:I wanted to just go away and, you know, slip it under the carpet. No chance.

30:26Mike Minogue:Under the rug. No chance. No, the carpet, man. The rug can be moved. The carpet can't, you see. Okay. Here's Smashing Pumpkins. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike, and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at 4 on Radio Hauraki.

30:40Keyzie:Linkin Park there on the radio. Hodaki Big Show this Wednesday evening. The time is 6.14. Over to you, Keezy.

30:48Mike Minogue:Jase, could you please play the apology music? Sure, man. Nah, it's wrong. Thank you. Fellas, yesterday on the show I made a mistake, a huge mistake. It's the worst mistake I've ever made in my entire life. Wow. I mistakenly said to the audience, which is vast, I said, hey, do you want to come down to Dunedin? Do you want to come to Dunedin to the beer festival there? That's right. Do you want to win a prize? People called up. Oh, 800 Hodaki. People were keen. Yeah, it was a good prize too. Bloody hell. Yeah, trip for two down to the Dunedin Beer Festival. Flights, accommodation, the whole kit and caboodle.

31:33There was only one problem, wasn't there, Keezy?

31:34Mike Minogue:Yeah, yeah, yeah. The prize didn't exist. Yeah. what I had mistakenly done is not read properly and just assume that that's what we were doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I knew I'd made a mistake because as soon as I said it, I looked into the B studio and Pugs was bursting to tears. Yeah, he was sobbing. I've never seen him like that. We don't make mistakes like that on the big show. Wow, wow, wow. Very real. Yeah, yeah, wow. Hey, and another way to look at it is, fellas, it's like, fuck, good run. Five years, zero mistakes. Yeah, you've had a shocker, though, the last couple of weeks, haven't you?

32:05Have I? It's been a real couple of weeks. A couple of weeks for first, if I remember correctly.

32:11Keyzie:Eight F-bombs, too, over the years, too. Yeah, shocking bastard.

32:14Mike Minogue:Eight. But look, that might happen in the future, right? That prize might happen in the future. Let's just say that. For now, though. I was talking to Bogsy. He said it definitely won't. It's off the table. The CEO? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's very involved for a CEO, isn't he? Well, he needs to be, man, because you are all over the show. You need a steady hand at the tiller. You do. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

32:38Keyzie:Otherwise you just go crashing into the coral. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've got to be careful, Keesey. Otherwise, next thing you know, you'll be chucking the rugby ball around the studio, knocking glasses of water all over the computers. Smashing bowls. Smashing bowls out in the kitchen, kicking the ball around willy-nilly, acting like you've got skills, you've got none. Hey, I cleaned those up.

32:55Mike Minogue:You know, we've got to be careful with you, man. I cleaned both of those messes up. Oh, did that actually happen? Oh, did it? Hey, but fellas, here's the prize, right? Here we go. I think I'll have myself a beer Big Show The Radio Hodaki Big Show Name our beer That's right, name our beer fellas 2026 today in Craft Beer and Food Yeah boy They're making a beer specifically for the festival It is a tropical, hazy pale ale It needs a name If you'd like to name it You give us a call right now On 0800 Hodaki You suggest a name Boom! Free Emerson's hoodie

33:34Keyzie:Yeah, nice.

33:34Mike Minogue:Just like that. Boom. 0800 Hodaki, give us a buzz right now with a good name for that beer.

33:40Keyzie:And that's free, that hoodie.

33:41Mike Minogue:It is free. 100 % free.

33:43Keyzie:I tell you what, I love me a good hoodie. You do? I love me hoodies. Hoodie J. Yeah, Hoodie J. You're wearing one right now, man. It rules. Yeah, thank you. It's not an Emerson's, though, which is a bugger.

33:56Mike Minogue:No, you're right. Emerson's, of course, are the ones that are making it all possible. They are, well, they've been a big partner of the big show for a long time. fellas. They have. Don't forget if you're keen to go to the Dunedin Beer Festival. DunedinBearFestival.co.nz It's happening a little later on in the year. We're talking Friday, November 27th and Saturday, November 28th at Forsyth Bar Stadium. Shapeys are playing. Shape chef the Troy King in Rib Fountain. How good. Plus more than 75 beer food and beverage vendors. 100 % true, Mogey. I don't lie about this sort of shit.

34:26Keyzie:Yeah, I don't know if I can trust you. Bloody great. Well, let's go to the phone lines. G'day, Jordan, you mad bastard. How's life? Oh, I'm great, thanks. What are you, how are you? Yeah, good, thanks, mate. What do you do for a crust, Jordan? Oh, just innovation. Oh, okay, renovation, sweet. What did you say, innovation? No, no, I said innovation. Oh, innovation.

34:44Mike Minogue:Sorry.

34:44Keyzie:Yeah, backbone. Yeah, good on you, man. Backbone, shit. We need our innovators, don't we, fellas?

34:49Mike Minogue:Actually, do you have a good innovative name for our beer, Jordan? Oh, yeah, I might do, actually. You might like it.

34:56Keyzie:It's Keezy on all four bottles looking over his bottle top, Keezy.

35:02Mike Minogue:Jordan, that name is shit. That is good stuff. I couldn't help myself. No, it's good shit, Jordan. Boom, you've got yourself an Emerson's hoodie. All right, brother? Oh, thank you so much for that. No, you're welcome, man.

35:13Keyzie:Thanks again. That's a great name, actually. It's a good name for Jordan. It's Beer Jordan. Yes. Beer Jordan. Beer Jordan. Yeah, that's what he should call himself. And it's a silhouette of him. Yeah, that's right. Scaling a beer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just over the net there. Yeah, good stuff.

35:27Mike Minogue:Hey, fellas, big shout out to Emerson's and also a big shout out to the Dunedin Bear Festival. Don't forget to hit up their website, dunedinbearfestival.co.nz for tickets. Beautiful. The Hodaki Big Show with Jase, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hodaki.

35:42Keyzie:Yes, indeed. Faith, no more. They're on the Hodaki Big Show this Wednesday evening. Fellas, let's give out some advice. Me, Paddy Nips, 69 at gmail.com.

35:56Mike Minogue:Get in touch with the fellas. With the fellas. Meet pattynip69 at gmail.com. Real email address. Get in touch. It's anonymous. We give out great advice and you get a re-burger voucher if we read it on the show. G'day there. Fellas, anonymous here. I've got a proper nightmare going on at my place. Oh, no. Some hooded joker is rocking up to my building every day at 4am, dumping a mountain of bird seed on the street and then gapping it before anyone can catch him. It's been going on for ages now and every morning it's an absolute circus. hundreds of birds and whatever else going feral outside my window.

36:32Mike Minogue:My car is copping it daily. The street looks like a crime scene, and I'm running on stuff all sleep. Best part is the keen bastard doesn't even stick around to watch the chaos, just does the drop and bails like a proper ghost. How do I deal with this shocking bastard, fellas? I saw this on the news. This was on the news, Jase. Was it? Yes, they had a news crew that accosted the person. I think it might have been in Australia, though. weirdly enough. So I don't know. So yeah, I don't know. It's a tricky one, isn't it? Nah, I don't know. I'm going through it at the moment with the birds waking me up.

37:06Yeah. That's with no seeds involved at all.

37:08Mike Minogue:That's just one or two though, isn't it? It's just a couple of vocal bastards there.

37:14Keyzie:There's a young lady

37:18Keyzie:in the square, Aotea Square there, who every couple of days or so stands in the middle of the square with handfuls of seed. Oh, yeah. And is just... Birdseed. Birdseed, yeah. Absolutely mobbed. And she lived by pigeons. Like, literally, there'll be 50 pigeons on her. And she just stands there. Loves it. And I'm like, I couldn't think of anything more icky than being covered. Does that give you the ick? With flapping birds. Well, to be fair. Pecking away. I mean, that's my nightmare.

38:01Mike Minogue:To be fair, my old flat, we used to have chickens. We had six chickens.

38:06Keyzie:Do you used to feed the chickens?

38:07Mike Minogue:Yeah, and I used to fill up my hand with grain and feed the chooks. Yeah. And I loved it. Like, it's a really nice feeling.

38:15Keyzie:Peck, peck, peck.

38:16Mike Minogue:Yeah, it's fun. It's like you're part of nature, you know?

38:18Keyzie:I don't know about you guys. For me, they're a pest. Birds. Yeah. All of them. Yeah, I mean, you know how I feel. I went through that weird phase where I was getting attacked by birds. There were birds doing weird things in my roof. I've got no time for birds. So what would you do? I totally get what this guy is talking about. What do we do? What do we do, Jase? There's a guy dropping birdseed. Have you listened to this, man? I wouldn't leave the house.

38:45Mike Minogue:So your solution is just to stay indoors? Yes.

38:49Keyzie:Don't leave until this guy gets caught. And put away for 10 plus years. I would, this guy comes every morning about 4am, was it, Keezy? Yeah. I'd get up there, I'd set a booby trap. Right. You heard about that? Like dig a hole? No. Put a blanket over it? No, no, no, no, no, no. Booby trap. So while he's distracted, you tackle him.

39:15Mike Minogue:Oh, so someone, one person, oh. That's a good idea. You like that? And then there's seed everywhere. The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Red Hot.

39:30Keyzie:Chili Peppers here on the Radio Hauraki Big Show this Wednesday evening. Fellas, I've got a bone to pick. I got a bone to pick. Now, you'll be aware of the fact from the past that old hoodie Jay doesn't like birds very much.

39:47Mike Minogue:When you say that, what do you mean?

39:48Keyzie:Well, it's just as a kid I was attacked by them. I got attacked by a magpie once, and I think that's...

39:54Mike Minogue:Picked you up and flew off, didn't it?

39:55Keyzie:Yeah, it did. You were raised in a nest as one of its own. I was for ages. But in the end, you know, I just had to jump out. Was it the beak, do you reckon? Yeah, I think it was the beak. Well, that was the thingies. I thought it was a massive beak.

40:10Mike Minogue:Because you were wearing all black like you are now. Yeah, I was.

40:13Keyzie:And what you don't know about me, when I was about five years old, I had this weird grey streak in my hair. So I used to wear black with this grey streak in my hair And this big magpie saw me and went Macaw, macaw And picked me up and dumped me in the nest Far out But anyway Happens quite a lot This is my bugbear Now you'll be aware of the fact that I live in the CBD now Old hoity J

40:41Keyzie:And my wife and I are prone to the occasional cafe visit As you do when you're living in the city You know, it's right there on your doorstep.

40:49Mike Minogue:I would say as you do if you live anywhere, to be honest.

40:51Keyzie:Well, not out west. There's heaps of cafes out. There's a great cafe just on the corner by my house. I don't call a petrol station a cafe, Keezy. Oh, okay. Well, never mind. But anyway, so what I've noticed, and particularly in my two favourite cafes, which I won't, you know, name, is the amount of birds inside the cafe. Now, you'll be sitting there, right? No, I'm prone in one of the cafes. You're prone. So you're lying down. You're lying down. I'm looking over my shoulder or on my hands and knees. What I like. That's not prone. What do you like when you're prone? When I am, you know, ordering my favourite dish, which is Turkish eggs, and it has a labneh, you know, which is like a cheesy sort of sauce, which is really good.

41:36Keyzie:But there's always like a couple of pigeons flying around. I don't know about you, but I find that massively disconcerting. I find it unhygienic.

41:46Mike Minogue:Pigeons, yes. They're big.

41:48Keyzie:I hate the idea that I'm tucking into my Turkish eggs and then one of the pigeons does a massive pigeon steamer right on my Turkish eggs. Well, that's not going to happen, though, is it? Well, I mean, why wouldn't it happen? Is there flying around the place? You know what I mean? It's like, what's going on here? The birds flying, these pigeons, you're inside. You're inside the cafe and there'll be a pigeon buddy hopping around. So hopping or flying? Well, they hop and then they fly. You know, the last thing you want to do is order a ham and cheese croissant and have a big splatter on it. You know what I'm saying?

42:25Mike Minogue:Do you find it ironic that you're in a cafe eating eggs from a bird and complaining about birds? No. Good. But you know what I mean? The Hauraki Big Show with Jace, Mike and Keezy. Tune in weekdays at four on Radio Hauraki. Mogey.

42:44Keyzie:Douche, douche, douche. Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.

42:48Mike Minogue:Mogey.

42:49Keyzie:Well, there you go, you mad bastards. That's the big show done and dusted for your Wednesday. And the disclaimer today, the new name for what used to be previously called the outro podcast. What clip have you got for us, Keezy?

43:01Mike Minogue:It's a clip about Jay's putting and having the yips. Did I tell you to think about hot pot?

43:07Keyzie:No. When you were putting? I was already thinking about hot pot.

43:10Mike Minogue:Boydee Jay's got the yips.

43:13Keyzie:Oh, have you got the yips?

43:13Mike Minogue:He's got the putting yips. No, you've had the yips, right? I have. No, but he's starting to really dwell on it now. Right. Which is making it way worse. Getting it inside his own head, yeah. And he'll step up to hit it and he'll say stuff like, this is where I f***ed up last time. And I'm like, Dad, of course you're going to hit bad if you think that as soon as you go to hit it.

43:32Keyzie:Yeah, we're broken men. We're broken golfers, Mogi. But anyway, moving on, what's your plan for the night? Me and Keesley are going on a hot date. Yes. Can't tell you any more than that. It's a bit of a surprise. Bit of an industry who's who situation.

43:44Mike Minogue:That's right. Yeah, exactly. So looking forward to that. We might have some information about that tomorrow. A few yarns to tell. Yeah, how good. Oh, Mogey and Keezy out on the town. Painting it red, brother. Yeah, sounds good. We've already got the yarn about me getting all the hors d 'oeuvres, putting it on the floor in the toilet, and then eating it on all fours. You're a shocking bastard. Sometimes I forget, Jase. He's a shocking bastard. I know. You can't take him anywhere. You don't need to remind me. But you keep taking me places. I keep doing it. I know. Shocking bastard. You know, at some point, man, I've probably got to blame myself, don't I?

44:14Yeah. Because I keep taking him places, he keeps on doing it. But, you know, you've just got to expect it from the guy because it's just part of who he is. It's who I am. It's who he is, man. Is it his fault or is it my fault? It's probably my fault for expecting anything different.

44:27Mike Minogue:Actually, Jase, you're having hot pot tonight. What's hot pot like eating off the floor of a public toilet? Yeah, really good, man. Really good. Yeah.

44:35Keyzie:I might try it. I'm off. I'm going to don my skull candies. Douche, douche. Just sit in the restaurant with your skull candies on. My wife will be opposite me. She'll be on her phone probably looking at Insta. You guys have got a great relationship. We'll scoff it all down and then go home. I don't know, actually. I think I might watch telly and then go to bed. No, because I'm really a bit sore after the old golf today. Have a sauna, man. Not a bad idea, Keezy. He won't. I think it might be closed, though. Actually, I should investigate that. You should. I've never been quite sure. You should investigate it, but you won't.

45:12Keyzie:You do nothing.

45:14Mike Minogue:Investigate it like you're a detective.

45:15Keyzie:Oh, no, actually, I think it's up until like nine. Yeah. Yeah, good stuff. Okay. Or I might just have a... You know what? I think I'll have a bath. No, you won't. You don't have a bath. You'll do nothing. You haven't had a bath or cleaned yourself in years.

45:29Mike Minogue:Goodbye! See you tomorrow.

45:39Thank you.